this song gets me so emotional sigh

Preference: Telling Him You're Pregnant *requested*

Harry: You’ve told almost everyone else you could think of, except for the one person that really deserves to know. In fact, Harry should have been the first person you told, but you couldn’t find it in you to break the news. He’s at the very peak of his career right now, and you don’t want to ruin this for him by telling him you’re going to be having his baby. You feel like he’s not ready to settle down yet, as he’s still having the time of his life while touring the world.  However, you know you must say something eventually, because sooner or later, he’ll figure it out on his own. You’d rather him hear it from you. “Harry,” You mumble as you sit with him in a hotel room. He pauses in the middle of his sentence, concern washing over him as he takes note of your nervous expression. “I can’t put this off any longer. I have to tell you, I’m just so nervous. I don’t want to mess this up for you and-” He cuts you off in the midst of your rambling by placing his hand on your leg and softly massaging your skin. “Don’t be nervous. And it isn’t possible for you to mess anything up for me, so don’t worry about it. Now, what do you have to tell me?” He says, his eyes focusing on yours. “I’m pregnant, Harry. We’re, uh, we’re having a baby,” You spit the words from your mouth, wanting to cover your face with your hands but Harry holds your hands down. “Are you serious?” He squeaks, and you nod. “I can’t believe you were ever worried! Why wouldn’t I want to have a baby with you?” He excitedly kisses the back of your hand. “Do you think it’ll have my eyes? Or maybe your eyes would be better…” He trails off, lost in the fact that he’s going to be father, which he couldn’t be more thrilled about. 

Liam: After you find out for yourself, you decide to wait a while until you tell anyone. Having a baby is something that you and Liam never really discussed before, though you knew that you wanted to have kids eventually. You just aren’t sure what he’ll think about it all. You can’t help but be worried about it, yourself. You’ve been quiet about it for some time now, and you’re starting to feel that you shouldn’t be keeping this a secret anymore. You think that you should at least tell Liam, since after all, it is his child. “We really need to talk,” You announce over an otherwise silent dinner table. Liam is sat across from you, enjoying the meal you cooked for him. You, on the other hand, aren’t really in the mood for eating. You’ve been shoving the food around on your plate with your fork, refusing to eat any of it as you attempt to distract yourself from what’s about to come. “Uh-oh,” He chuckles, leaning back and folding his hands in his lap, patiently waiting for you to continue. “I don’t know how you’re going to feel about this, but it’s about time that I just tell you, anyway. We’re having a kid, Liam. I found out a while ago, but I kept it a secret until now,” You admit, fidgeting with your shaky fingers. “How?” He questions, more to himself than anyone else. “Do I really need to explain?” You say with a giggle. His hands move through his hair and a few happy tears form in his eyes. “This is amazing, sweetheart. Come, we need to talk about names,” He stands, extending a hand to you, which you gladly take.

Niall: You find yourself staring at Niall, and you can’t help but picture what your baby might look like. A smile tugs at your features when you imagine your child having Niall’s eyes. “What?” Niall’s voice interrupts your thoughts, and you see him smirking at you. “You’re smiling. Do I have something on my face?” He wonders while raising an eyebrow. “No,” You tell him, dropping your eyes to the floor. “Is something wrong?” He worries, moving closer to you and wrapping an arm around you.“No,” You say again, and suddenly you feel as if now is the perfect time to tell him the news; that you’re having his baby. It’s only the two of you, sat next to each other on the couch. He’s giving you his full attention at the moment, and you can’t think of a better time to tell him. “What do you think about having a baby, Niall?” You ask him, and he clicks his tongue. His eyelashes flutter and he looks upward. “I can see it,” He nods. “I wouldn’t mind having a few mini versions of myself running around,” He looks down at you again, and he’s smiling this time. “So, you’re fine with it?” You swallow, searching his face while his features soften. “Are you tryin’ to tell me something, princess?” He winks, and you shove him playfully. “I only ask because, uh…” You weren’t very nervous until this point, and you can feel your voice becoming unsteady as you force the words from your mouth. You close your eyes as you say, “I only ask because I found out yesterday that we’re having a baby.” He pulls you into his chest and holds you close in a bone-crushing hug. “I am so excited right now, I can’t even explain it to you,” He manages to squeak out, along with a few emotional sniffles. 

Louis: “Did you hear the crowd?” Louis asks as you pull your shoes off your feet. You nod and he sighs. “Oh, it was just amazing,” He says, still buzzing about his performance. “I love it when they sing along with us. They know every line, and their voices always blend so well,” He continues to explain, untying his own shoe laces. “For a few minutes, everyone just comes together in a song and it’s kind of magical,” He admits with a chuckle. “Okay, okay,” You roll your eyes. “Don’t get all emotional on me now.” He shrugs and finds a place to sit. He finally settles down in a chair, where he leans back and folds his arms behind his head. “I’m literally so tired, though,” He tells you as his heavy eyelids begin to shut. “Wait!” You shout, a bit too loudly, and Louis jolts, his eyes flying open. “What?” He gasps. “Don’t fall asleep yet. I need to tell you something,” You say. He sighs again, and relaxes back in his chair. “Didn’t need to scare the life out of me,” He grumbles under his breath and you find a spot across the room from him. “You should know…” You start in a small voice. “That I am pregnant with your baby,” You spit out, and once again, Louis jolts upward. “What?!” He shrieks. “Don’t mess with me, (Y/N). Now is not the time,” He warns. “I promise I’m not lying to you. I wouldn’t lie about something like this. We are having a baby, Louis.” He stares at you blankly for a moment, and you’re starting to worry, when he suddenly jumps with his fists in the air. “We are going to be the best parents,” He decides, motioning for you to come so he can hug you.

Zayn: “Sit,” Zayn’s mom instructs, pulling out a chair for you at the dinner table. You smile at her, and take your seat at the table as everyone gathers together. You’ve begun to feel really comfortable around Zayn’s family, and his sisters are almost your best friends. Therefore, you want Zayn’s family to know about the baby as soon as Zayn, himself. While you’re visiting at home with him, you think you should break the news now. You have no doubts that you’ll be supported, and you know that Zayn will be ecstatic once you tell him. The room has settled into a silence and you clear your throat, calling attention to yourself. “I actually have some good news,” You say, and Zayn looks at you with an eyebrow raised. You rest your hands in your lap, and an uncontrollable smile spreads across your face. “So, me and Zayn are having a baby,” You announce, and a mixture of gasps and squeals fill the room. “Really?!” Zayn stands, beaming from ear to ear. “Really,” You nod and his mother stands too, wrapping her son up in a huge hug, which everyone eventually joins in on. “When did you find out?” Zayn’s oldest sister asks you, after you break apart from each other. “Just before we left to come here. But I wanted to wait until we were all together to tell anyone,” You explain. “I can’t believe I’m actually going to be a dad, like that’s crazy,” Zayn muses, running his hands through his hair. “Well, I think you’ll be wonderful at it,” You say to him, and he presses his lips to your forehead.

I feel like Louis’ and Zayn’s aren’t that great because I was running out of ideas haha. If anyone has a preference request, put it in my ask box! :)

a day in december: words of good cheer

on ao3

this is ~technically~ part of the “seasonal fucking cheer 2016 ficathon” @msdisdain and @roquentine19​ are running, buuuuut i didn’t want to use all of the prompts so i’m just goING FOR IT

basically, i’ll be posting every single day in december. or i will die trying.

since i had finals today (and am supposed to be answering questions for a lit mem final rn whOOPS) i didn’t really get a chance to google much about holidays in france. so this one might be p americanized. i’ll try to either be better or be more focused on the wintery stuff. most aren’t going to be too christmas-y, but this is where inspiration struck

based off this one thomas sanders vine

MADE IT JUST IN TIME


“You have a ‘4x + 12yx’, right?” Adrien asks.

Marinette hums in response.

“Ok so I pulled out a ‘4x’—”

“Disgusting,” Alya mutters.

Adrien rolls his eyes. “Just factor out the ‘4x’.”

“Factor out the ‘4x’,” Marinette murmurs. “Okay. Sure. This looks worse than before.”

“I promise it’ll look less gross in about ten seconds.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” Alya says.

Adrien scoffs. “I’m just trying to teach math.”

“Math is a sin,” she deadpans.

He raises his eyebrows and is very glad that they’re just in a voice call, because Marinette would find a way to punch him through the screen if she saw the expression on his face right now.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

can you write some christmas stories plzzz starring members of bts btob and whoever else u like . ho ho ho mry xmas

A Winter’s Tale AKA BTS Hosts a Christmas Party (featuring BTS, BTOB, EXO, VIXX, BIG BYUNG, and selected members of Topp Dogg or rather just Jenissi).

“You know, when Exo planned the annual Christmas party last year it was on a yacht and David Beckham was there,” Jin comments, sorting through an old box of Christmas decorations and cringing when he finds a banner that reads, “Christmas 1989.”

“Yeah well,” Namjoon knocks into their Christmas tree and three or four ornaments fall and shatter. “They’re on that Suho budget. We’re planning it this year and all we’ve got is 15 bucks, a Dunkin Donuts gift card that may or may not be expired, that ancient box of decorations Taehyung found in God only knows where, and a piñata but the piñata is an Easter bunny. Thanks again for the Easter bunny, really Jimin, good job.”

“Hey!” Jimin yells, “It was on sale and is Christmas not just pregame Easter? Sure I mean most people celebrate the birth of Jesus around this time but is it really too early to party for the resurrection?”

Yoongi, not helping whatsoever and lounging on the couch, throws his hands up lazily and says, “He is risen!”

“I summoned that box of decorations by the way,” Taehyung adds. “I found a spellbook in the attic.”

Namjoon takes off his sunglasses, breaks them, and rolls his eyes. “Everybody stop saying weird things. What I’m getting at is that we’re never going to have yachts and handsome football players so we’re going to have to be creative.”

Hoseok is writing out the invitations and signing them with little horses in Santa hats. “Should we invite Vixx?”

“Nah, they’re only into Halloween and the occasional Friday the 13th.”

“That means no Big Byung.”

“Scratch that. Invite them.”

Keep reading

The Irony of Choking on a Lifesaver

Song preference

Ashton:

Stop fucking around with my emotions!” You screamed at him, but immediately regretted it.

“What are you even talking about?” Ashton sighed. You guys were having an argument over why you seemed so distant lately.

“Ashton you need to decide right here, right now, whether or not you have feelings for me because I’m tired of all this messing around. I’m tired of this weird relationship we have. Are we platonic, are we not? What is going on with us?” You said in one breath, thankful to finally get the load off you back.

Ashton sat for awhile, opening and closing his mouth multiple times, trying to piece together words. Until he stood up abruptly, as he frustratingly tugged on his hair, “Do you want to be platonic,or do you want to be more? Do you want to be with me as more than just friends because I have had feelings for you for the longest time, but I thought you only liked me as a friend.”

You quickly smiled, “You have got to be the most oblivious person I’ve ever met…”

“I don’t get it why are you smiling?”

“Because I’ve had feelings for you for the longest time, as well.”

“But Calum said-”

“Calum’s a doof. Don’t listen to him.”

Calum:

“Why can’t you just be happy for me?" You tugged Calum off to the side of the party, as he was starting to make a scene. You guys had dated, but broke up over having different view on where exactly the relationship was going. You guys had somehow managed to still be friends. It had been couple months later, and you had moved on, but it was obvious Calum hadn’t.

"I am happy for you, but why did you have to bring that whacker?”

“He makes me happy, Calum. Why? Are you jealous?”

“Of course I’m jealous (Y/N). How could I not be? And how could you have moved on so fast?”

“Well, let’s just say I haven’t.”

Luke:

“I’ll never be good enough no, I’ll never be good enough.Will I?” You asked Luke solemnly, as he consoled you after another break-up. 

“What are you talking about? Of course you’re good enough.” Luke said rubbing your shoulder comfortingly.

“Yeah,” You said sarcastically, “For who exactly?”

Luke shifted you around, so you could look in his eyes, “For me.”

You sat and stared at him for awhile, trying to decipher the look on his face, and wondering how long he felt this way, “I had no idea you felt that way about me, Luke.”

“Of course you haven’t (Y/N) because you’re too busy chasing after those tools who don’t even think twice about anyone but themselves.”

Michael:

“I’m sick and tired of false devotion,” You sighed, after having another argument with Michael. 

“I’ll try harder, I promise,” Michael nudged his face into the crook of your neck in an attempt to make things better.

“Yeah, I’ve heard that before.”

“I’m sorry… You know I’m new at this whole relationship thing,” He nuzzled even closer. It was true. Before you, Michael never really had an interest in having a relationship with a girl.

You sighed giving in to his ridiculous amount of adorableness.

“Tell you what, how about tomorrow we go somewhere just the two of us?” Michael sat up, grinning like a fool.

“Like what?” You smiled.

He nuzzled back to his previous position, “It’s a surprise,” he giggled.

Sorry they’re not of equal length.

Chasing Cars

After Andrea’s break down in one of the stores, she walked away there and just walked outside the mall trying to catch some air as she still had tears on her eyes. She stayed walking around there trying to calm herself a bit until someone found her, it was another pregnant girl that walked to her and actually were the first helpful person she had around on that shopping day. She got her to a big shop near the mall that she really couldn’t tell if it was a cloth shop or a damn terapist as the line of crying girls in there but she was crying too, really couldn’t judge them, they were like her. So after she get there and got more calm talking to some she finally walked around the place and saw something nice that she could like and finally, something that fit her so that made her feel a lot better. Before she realized, trying stuff and buying some other, it was 8 pm already. 

When she walked out there, she walked to the mall trying to found her car but then recalled she left the keys to Chace so obviously the car weren’t there. She openned her phone and called out a taxi, then she also saw some missing calls from the doctor so when she got in the taxi she called him back, he got the results and she decided to stop by there and get them. He gave him a letter where it said how good the baby was actually and the DVD and pictures of the baby that with the hurries they left there the other time and she smiled and walked back to the taxi. Where the next stop was their house, she sighed lighlty once she reach there and paid the taxi, taking all her bags out and walked in. Looking the lights on off the livingroom she sighed once again, she didn’t want to get into some argument with him about her missing the whole day, or whatever Aly could have told him talk, or anything at all so before he had time to react of her opening the door she talked. “I’m back also tired, I’m going upstairs” she said and runned upstairs closing herself on their room and sat like on the gif and sighed frustated a bit as she knew she’d had to face that conversation at some point.

2 - “Maybe you should” | A. I

Moans and squeaks from a bed keep you up most of the night. Its become a routine for this to happen, and as much as you try to can’t block out the noises of your roommate Ashton having sex with his girlfriend. They have been going out for months but you didn’t see what he saw in her. They always fought but they always made up, mostly in physical ways, it seemed then never connected on an emotional level. 

Someone like Ashton deserved better, and you deserved to be able to sleep. If you didn’t have work in the morning you wouldn’t care, but you had to get up early. It finally stopped at 3am and you fell asleep, but not until at 7am you hear yelling in the living room.

You walk out in your t-shirt and shorts to see what was going on, and you find Ashton and his girlfriend yelling at each other, “What the hell is going on here?”

Ashton looks over at you begging you to help, but his girlfriend keeps on yelling at him. You were done, “Listen! You are a guest in my and Ashton apartment and i’m tired of you always in here talking shit about my roommate, bossing him around, and treating him like shit. Either act like an adult or get the fuck out. I have work and after both of you keeping me up all night with your fucking then waking me up earlier then I needed to this morning.”

Her mouth drops open and Ashton doesn’t say a word, “Ashton are you just going to let her talk to me like that?” 

Ashton said nothing, “He doesn’t speak for my actions now get the hell out of are apartment, and don’t come back to you gain some respect for the people around you,” you say and she glares at both of you grabbing her things and slamming the from door.

It was silent and you shake your head, “Damnit Ashton I swear you know how to pick them,” you say walking back to your room but he catches your arm, “Y/N I didn’t want you to make her leave,” you turn towards him, “Well what did you want me to do Ash? I was tired of it. You’ve had no respect for me, and neither did she. How could you be with someone like that Ash? She doesn’t care about you. She only wants you for your dick.”

Ashton’s eyebrows knit together, “What the fuck is your issue. You know nothing about our relationship,” he says letting you go, and you cross your arms over your chest, “Are you kidding? I know exactly what your relationship is. You and her argue when she doesn’t get her way, then you apologize, and then you fuck,” he rolls his eyes, “That is not true,” Ashton says, and you shake your head, “Do you know her favorite food? What makes her laugh? What her favorite movie is? Anything about her family?” 

Ashton looks down at his feet and shakes his head no. “That’s what I thought,” you say confidently turning away again until ashton opens his mouth, “Why do you care!? Are you jealous or something!?” Ashton yells getting your attention. 

You turn back and explode back expressing all your emotions that you have been holding in for so long, “Maybe I am! Maybe its because I want to be with you,” you yell running one of your hands through your hair. 

You continue to scream heightened by your emotions, “Maybe I want to be the one to cuddle you at night. The one that you wanna facetime when you’re on tour, and the girl you write love songs about. I wanna be the one who steals all your t-shirts when your away so that I don’t forget you’re real, and the one to make you feel better when your sad and having you trust me enough to pour your heart out to me,” you say getting quieter and quieter as Ashton stays incredibly quiet mesmerized by your words. You sigh exhausted, “and maybe I just wanna be the girl to kiss you all the fucking time.”

You bite your lip finishing your speech and wait for Ashton to respond which feels like an eternity. He looks at you up and down then a slight smile forms on his mouth, “Maybe you should.”

You look at him with a confused expression, “What?” you ask.

He smiles stepping close to you, “Maybe. You. Should,” he says slowly, but you’re still confused, “Should what?”

He rolls his eyes in annoyance, “Maybe you should kiss me,” he said confidently, and you raise an eyebrow, “Maybe I should,” you say and he grins big, “Then do it.”

You sigh with frustration, “You cocky bastard…fine I will,” you say walking up to him, going up onto your toes, and pressing your lips to his. For a second neither of you were moving, but then both of you moved your lips slowly in sync getting used to each other, but far to quickly Ashton pulled away cupping your cheek with his hand as he rubbed his thumb against your cheek, “Why don’t I cook you dinner tonight, and we can talk things over when you get home from work,” he said, and you leaned your face further into hand, “I’d like that.”


Masterlist | Request

  • <p> <b>Me:</b> did yall see shawn, my maple leaf cutie, just perform mercy on snl!?!?! im screaming i really really really loved it there are tears streaming down my cheeks because its so beautiful and the passion that just flows through the performance really makes me get emotional and his voice oh dear his voice is so good and I just want to see him sing mercy live let's be real i wanna see every song live. *sighs* i love him<p/><b>Me:</b> *takes a deep breath* *yooooodeling*<p/></p>
Nervous part 2

Requested
Don’t forget to send in requests!!

_____________
Music was so high in the club . After the Grammys, a friend of mine threw an afterparty in one of the biggest nightclub . The only thing i love about being invited to an afterparty that your drinks are free and music so awesome.

I was chilling with my friends drinking my 5th shot for the night when i saw Justin Bieber . He is so hot in reality and very friendly. I don’t know why when we bumped backstage i felt like he needed help , i did my best and he surely enjoyed it .

He was walking toward me with his friends . He was well known in the party as he almost greeted and man hugged everyone in the party . I gotta admit he has some good music .

“Hey there ” he said sitting next to me . While his friends made their way to my squad.
“Hi , you were really good at stage ”
“Without you I haven’t performed that good ”
I blushed remembering me staring at his tattoos while he was shirtless under me .

“Its okay .. I also get nervous when performing ”
“Yeah its kinda crazy , one mistake can destroy the whole thing ” he sighed , looking all sad .
“Do you wanna get some fresh air ?” He asked trying to less the tension in the air . I nodded and then went to the roof .

“You have a really nice voice ” he said .
“Oh thank you so much ” i said smiling .
“I actually love your song Pain it is the best actually , full of emotions and lyrics is awesome”
“Yeah it took me a lot to write it ..“i said remembering the motive to write this song . It was because of my famous heartbreaker.

"You write songs ?” I nodded, he looked impressed.
“Well you can come to my studio and we can make something together ”
“What?! The Justin Bieber wants to make a song with me ?!! ” i raised my voice in excitement. It is awesome!
“Yeah .. Your voice is beautiful.. You are beautiful so why not ” he chuckled then brought up his hand and touched my check with his hand . I closed my eyes leaning in his touch .
“I don’t know why there is strange attraction pulling me towards you ” he whispered going down , his breath fanning my red plump lips . I just want to crash my lips at his . He slowly leaned in and crashed his lips on mine . Our lips moving together wanting more , hands crawling up my back playing with my hair . My hands playing with the small hairs of his neck . We knew we wanted more .

________
Y/N and Justine Bieber dating ?!

After days if the Grammys Awards , a 2 minute video of both Y/N and Justin Bieber was on the internet . The video was a hot make out session with both of them although both of them were still recovering from heartbreak . People saw them 2 entering Justin’s hotel at night while holding hands and this was confirmed by guest of the hotel . The Sorry singer was seen the next day holding hands marching towards their studio . An insider says that both of them are writing a song which will be released next month with DJ Tay James .

___________________
Okay I don’t know if i should do part 3 or nah 😂. If you are asking part 3 will include the incredible success of the song “ Servant For Love ” - bc I already wrote a song for it ;) - and they will both make a music video for it . Tell me what you want ;)

Anyway tomorrow i will be posting an imagine called “ The Jungle ”

Tell me what you think !
Thank you for your support
‘NA💯

Link for part one : http://naglaali2002.tumblr.com/post/138361795359/nervous

The Next Chapter #14 - MMFD Fanfic

I’m thinking there will be about 5-6 more chapters left ;x

“Come here, girl” Finn motioned with his arms wide open.

Rae was having a crappy two days. It was noon on Friday and her anxiety was at an all time high. The show was due to start today but she had been throwing up all morning. She had called Raven this morning to tell her about her pregnancy, and was a bit disappointed in her reaction. She said congratulations, but not before reminding Rae that she was under contact for the next six months. She lectured how the show had to be a priority and that Rae could have had better timing. Rae knew that being friends with your boss could be a bit tricky, but she was a bit disappointed by Ravens reaction.

She had also told her Mom and Kareem last night, which didn’t go over very well. In fact Linda had nearly disowned them both, talking on and on about being responsible adults and breaking trust.

It was all just a bit overwhelming and while Linda had finally came around in the end, congratulating them both, she knew their relationship was going to need a bit of work in the coming months.

Rae leaned against Finns chest as he wrapped her into a hug. “Tonight is going to be brilliant, you were meant for this.” he kissed the top of her head, which was too much for her emotions, because she started bawling into his shirt.

He led her into his office and closed the door. “Rae, please don’t cry babe. I promise everything is going to be okay. The show will be great and your mom will come around and well Raven is just a good business women. As long as we do well with the show I’m sure she will come to see that this is a good thing.”

Finn always knew exactly what to say to make Rae feel a bit more calm. “I was reading that book and it says that the sickness shouldn’t last much longer. Did you know that baby is the size of a kidney bean? We have a bean!” Finn put both his hands on Rae’s cheeks wiping her tears with his thumbs. “I love you Rae, more than anything in the world and I can’t wait to meet our little girl.”

“We’re not having a girl Finn, I told you he’s a boy.” she smiled keeping up the little game they had been playing as of late.

Truth be told, they both didn’t care what the sex of the baby was, they just wanted he or she to be healthy. Rae had to admit that Finn reading the baby book her mom had given them was such a turn on.

Finn kissed Rae with a fiery passion and before too long she was seated on his desk, her legs wrapped around him, he troubles forgotten for the moment.

                                     **************************************

“Yeah, I understand Raven. Okay, yeah I will make sure to tell them all. Yeah go ahead and email it on over. Okay, thanks bye.” Rae hung up the phone after the five minute conversation had turned into a twenty minute one. She was exhausted.

“What did she say?” Finn asked, laying in bed his arms behind his head.

“She said that the ratings were really good, but that you’ve got to say ‘shit’ a bit less” Rae laughed climbing into bed and laying her head against his chest. “But, seriously they are really pleased with everyone, especially our shows on Wednesday nights. Something about ‘everyone loving a love story’ and that ‘your banter and bickering really drags them in’. They said the last eight weeks were the best the radio’s ever done.”

“We do not bicker” Finn noted looking into Rae’s eyes. “Rae, if everything is going really well, why do you seem so down?” He rubbed his hands through her hair that had grown at least six inches these last five months.

Rae shrugged. She was a bit shocked at how well the show had been going. She had been having such a good time especially now that her morning sickness was gone, but her energy had been so low, and she’d been so emotional she could barely even listen to the music she was playing. It seemed every song and every story had made her want to cry.

“You know Raven said you didn’t have to go on every night. We can start putting Chloe and Archie, or Me and Chop on some nights. Ya know, if it’s getting to be too much.”

“I know.” Rae sighed. With Izzy just hitting her 8th month of pregnancy, it wouldn’t be long before she would be needing a few weeks off. It just didn’t feel right pulling everyone in to work more hours, when they all have other things going on in life. This was her show and he idea and she went into it with the idea that she would be putting the most work into it. It was hard for her to explain how overwhelmed she had been feeling about everything though.

A lot had happened in the last two months. Finn had given up his flat and moved in with her and Chloe full time. She had a five night a week radio show to keep up with. Rae didn’t realize how much work went into a single show every night. Picking the music, reading the emails, it was a full time job, which she was happy to have, but lately her energy was just depleted.

“Rae, if something was wrong, you would tell me right?” Finn asked and she felt his heart rate speed up. “It’s just, you’ve been kind of distant lately. Like you hardly let me touch you anymore and you haven’t been eating all that well. Is there something going on?”

He always knew. It was a blessing and a curse because Rae needed someone to care, but she just couldn’t put into words how she was feeling. She knew that for both of their sakes, she had to try.
“I’m just tired Finn, I know it sounds stupid, but even eating is just so much effort. All day I just can’t wait to crawl into bed. My body has been aching a bit and this little boy has been kicking like crazy as of late.” Rae smiled as Finn gently pushed her onto her back and scooted down the bed so that his head was at her every growing stomach.


He was right, she hadn’t wanted him to touch her. She had just felt so huge lately. Her bump had finally started showing, but she just felt fat, not matter how much Finn told her how beautiful and glowing she was. She couldn’t help but be a bit envious at how cute Chloe and Izzy looked. She knew it wasn’t healthy to compare herself to them. Her body had always been an issue for Rae, but she hadn’t realize how effected by this weight gain she would be. Even if the doctor said at the last appointment she had only gained nine pounds, which was normal for how far along she was.

She was disappointed that they hadn’t found out the sex yet. The baby had not cooperated at their appointment two weeks ago, so the doctor said they could try again this Monday. She just felt disconnected and was hoping knowing what she was having might help.

“Well maybe we should discuss this with the doctor on Monday, just to make sure everything is okay with her. Maybe we should also go and see Kester. You know it’s okay to be a bit emotionally drained, love. Maybe talking with him would help.”

Rae knew Finn was right, but it didn’t help her to fell any better.

“Yeah I think you are right, and I’m sure he is fine. I’ll call Kester in the morning and see if I can see him directly after our appointment on Monday.”

She had been so busy lately that although she had spoken to Kester on the phone a few times, she hadn’t been in to see him in over a month. Actually not since she and Finn had told him they were expecting. Surprisingly, Kester had been really supportive which was a big shock. He seemed to think she was strong enough to handle it, but she wasn’t too sure.

“How’s my baby girl today?” Finn said, pulling up a bit on Rae’s shirt and placing his lips directly on her exposed belly. He liked to do this every night, but lately it just made Rae squirm. Her stretch marks that had always bothered her, had gotten a bit more dark since her stomach had started growing. Not even the cream her mom gave her was helping.

“He is doing fine.” She teased pulling down her shirt and placing her hands on Finn’s face, pulling his pouting lips to hers.

He attempted to deepen the kiss and for the first time in weeks, Rae let him. She missed his kiss, his touch and for tonight, she just needed to feel what he felt for her.

“Make love to me Finn” she said leaning over to turn off the lamp.

He didn’t need any more prompting and before she knew it, her clothes were on the floor. There was a little light coming in from the open curtains and if she wasn’t already naked she would have gotten up to close them, but it was too late.

Finn started trailing kisses down her body, but she grabbed his face, stopping him from going any lower. She just didn’t think she could handle it tonight. She just needed him inside her, that was all she could handle right now.

“Please, I need you inside me now.” she begged, a single tear rolling down her cheek.

The tremble in her voice was noticeable, but before he could ask her what was wrong again she said, “Please Finn, Please”

He quickly entered her before she could beg again and her hands gabbed his waist as e began to thrust. He held himself above her, on his knees and continued thrusting into her deeply and quickly until they were both out of breath and on the verge of coming. She knew she needed the release just as much as he did, but she just couldn’t get out of her own head.

As if he could sense her trepidation, his thumb wiped away her tear and he said “Let go, Rae. Just let go” and she instantly found her release. Finn wasn’t long after her and they lie together flat on their backs in the dark, their breathing slowly calming.

“Please” he pleaded making no move to touch her, but she felt as if he had slapped her. The hurt in his voice was enough to break her heart.

“I love you.” she rolled onto her side, placing her arm around his waist. “more than anything.”

“Why can’t you talk to me then. Why can’t you tell me how you’re feeling instead of having me fuck you in the dark while you are crying? Do you know how that makes me feel?”

He was angry and she didn’t blame him. But how could she tell him how she was feeling when she didn’t know. She didn’t understand it, she just felt so empty.

“I’m just… broken.” because really, that’s how she felt. Like she had somehow fell into pieces the past few months and even though she had such wonderful things in her life, she wasn’t happy.

“I don’t understand.” he shook his head, wrapping both his arms around her naked body. “I know a lots been going on, but I thought you were happy. You’ve got the show, the baby, the gang, me…”

“I know Finn, that’s why I can’t explain it to you. I want to talk to you so badly, but I just don’t know what to say that will make any sense. I just feel sad all the time. I feel stupid and ugly and like I don’t deserve you or this baby.” she buried her head in his chest ashamed that after all this time, she still felt like the lost sixteen year old girl.

“Okay baby, okay don’t cry. We’ll figure it out together, okay?” he continued to soothe her rubbing her head until she fell into a peaceful sleep.

                                            ***************************************

Monday November 4th 8:04am

Dear Diary,

I know it’s been a while, but I thought maybe writing how I’m feeling might be a bit helpful. I have an appointment at the doctors in about an hour. Hopefully we will be able to find out if the baby is a girl or a boy. Truth be told, I am hoping for a girl, because it seems to be what Finn wants.

I can feel Finn pulling away from me, but it’s not like I blame him, I pulled away first. I feel like I’m loosing him, but I’ve been feeling so lousy lately that I can see it’s been really hard on him. He hasn’t touched me since Friday night, not even a kiss. He stayed out with Chop until three am last night, saying something about one last hoorah before his and Izzy’s baby comes. I was asleep when he got in and he was in the shower before I even woke up.

I’m going to see Kester after my appointment today and I’m going to ask Finn to sit in with me. I’m hoping he will be able to help me work through how I’ve been feeling and to maybe if Finn hears how I’m feeling we can both understand. I’m also hoping that maybe Finn can tell me how he is feeling. He keeps it all bottled up.

Anyways I am going to try to write here a bit more often. I’m already feeling a bit better.

Rae Xoxo
                                             

                                ************************************

Thankfully everything with the baby was good. Rae hadn’t gained any more weight in the last two weeks, and the doctor said her emotions were pretty normal. He did advise that she see Kester, given her history with mental health issues, but he didn’t sound too worried. In fact he said, he had seen far worse.

Rae was relieved to hear this, but deep down she still knew something was going on. Thankfully she had seeing Kester to look forward to.

“Let’s see if this little one is feeling a little bit more friendly today” The doctor placed the machine on Rae’s belly and shut the light of. “Oh, it looks like he or she is moving around a lot today, which is really great..”

Finn smiled as she saw her little baby moving around on the screen.

“So what are you two hoping for?” the doctor asked.

“A Boy” Finn said.
“A Girl” Rae said at the exact same time.

They both looked at each other and burst out laughing, having suddenly switched up their picks.

“Well it looks like I can confirm one of you are right.” The doctor clicked a few buttons and some black and white photos of the baby printed out. He handed them to Finn “Congratulation, looks like you’ve got a perfectly healthy baby boy”

“No way?!” Finn smiled a mile wide and leaned over to give Rae a peck on the forehead. “You we’re right” he smiled at her, “I was hoping you would be.”

“Really?” she asked, “I thought you wanted a girl?”

“Nah,” There’s going to be plenty of little ladies around, us men are going to be out numbered.” he laughed, inspecting the photo a little bit closer.

“You see that? Yeah he is definitely my son.” Finn joked making Rae laugh ad the doctor left the room to give them a bit of privacy.

“I love you Finn” Rae grabbed his hand and his eyebrows bunched together at upon hearing the uncertainty in her voice.

“I love you too, girl.” he leaned over kissing her lips. “forever and ever”

                              ****************************************

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Cheating? (Harry Styles imagine)

It is pretty clear. Harry has an affair with Taylor. You hold the paper right in front of you and just stare at the the picture of them holding hands. How could he. He was the love of your life, at least you thought he was. You lay down the newspaper and walk towards the window seeing the raining drizzling down. You need to think, you need to go away for a while. You grab a back and fill it with some clothes, that’s all you need. As you want to walk out, Harry rushes inside and looks at you. He’s soaking wet and his eyes are red and puffy. You look back but don’t say a word. You just feel totally numb. ‘Please don’t go.’ He whispers. You both cry. ‘What do you expect me to do Harry? Snuggling on the couch with you and pretending it has never happened? It’s all so clear to me now. Why you were always home so late and didn’t pick up your phone.’ ‘I have nothing with here! Please believe me!’ ‘I don’t know what to think Harry!’ ‘Hit me, yell at me, tell me you hate me, but don’t leave.’ You shake your head while sobbing. ‘(Y/N) please I beg you! I love you! I love you so so much! You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me! Please!’ ‘I’m going to my parents. Leave me alone.’ You pass him and close the door behind you. You walk out off the street and call your mom. ‘(Y/N)! So nice you hear you, darling.’ You sob quietly. ‘Sweetie, are you crying?’ ‘He has someone else mum. Can I please stay with you and dad for a while?’ ‘Of course sweetheart, I’ll make your room ready. See you soon love.’ ‘Thank mum, I love you.’ ‘Love you too.’ You hang up and get in the car on your way towards your parents. You’re still crying and when you see your mum waiting for you, you cry even harder. She walks towards you and you hug her. ‘I hate him!’, you cry, ‘I fucking hate him!’ ‘Honey don’t say that.’ ‘I do! He has someone else!’ ‘Come inside, it’s really cold here.’ You follow her and sit on the couch. ‘And he just denies it! That’s the worst of all. He just lies to me!’ ‘I just don’t get it. Harry is such an honest person, remember when he always told you if he had done something wrong.’ You nod. ‘But I just don’t know this time. It just doesn’t feel right.’ ‘Darling, you can stay here as long as you want to. You just need time to think.’ You nod. ‘I’m going to take a shower.’ You walk upstairs and feel your phone vibrating in your pocket. It’s Harry. You ignore it and jump in the shower to escape your thoughts. The hot water runs over your body. When you get back in your room, you see you have a lot of text messages and missed calls.

Please (Y/N) call me

It is not what you think it is.

Please baby I love you so damn much!

Then you open the last text.

I don’t care what you think, I’m coming over.

That text was sent 25 minutes ago. As you listen carefully you can hear voices downstairs. One voice is very similar to Harry’s. ‘Fuck.’ You whisper. You just put on a sweater and some pajama pants and put your wet hair into a messy bun. ‘I just love her so much Emma.’ You hear him say. ‘I think I can hear her come off the stairs, I’m going for a walk.’ You hear the front door open close and walk into the living room. Harry looks at you and wants to hug you so tight, but he holds himself back. You sit next to him and look him straight in the eyes. ‘What are you doing here?’ He sighs. ‘Telling how much I love you and explaining the real story.’ ‘I listen.’ You were always really cold when were angry, like you have no emotion. ‘Taylor has asked me to help her write a song for her new album, so we got out for lunch. And if you are wondering why we held hands, it’s because the paparazzi was following us so I took her hand so we could get in the car. I would seriously never ever cheat on you. And I don’t care how much I have to tell you that I love you. Because I do!’ You look away with tears streaming down your face. ‘I’m going home. I just wanted to tell you.’ He stands up to walk out. ‘I’m so stupid.’ You say softly. He turns around. ‘What?’ ‘I’m stupid.’ You repeat. ‘No you aren’t.’ ‘Yes I am!’ Harry sits next to you and you fall in his arms. ‘You always tell the truth to me. So why didn’t I believe you this time?’ Harry kisses your hair. ‘I love you Harry.’ ‘I love you too. And your hair smells great.’ You giggle. ‘Harry?’ ‘Yes?’ ‘Do you wanna stay the night over here?’ ‘Sure if you’d like.’ You yawn and nod at same time. ‘Come here.’ Harry says and picks you up. He brings you upstairs into your room and lays you on your bed. You just laugh. He lays next to you and kisses your neck softly. ‘I just don’t know what to do without you.’ He whispers. You kiss him back. ‘It’s fine now. Don’t worry.’

You two cuddle the whole night and talk about weird stuff when you get so tired that you safely fall asleep in his arms.