this show sounds so terrible when you talk about it out loud

I never pranked my parents again after the incident.

by reddit user Eigengraulogy

I was 11 years old when it happened.

As a kid, I knew that something wasn’t quite right with the events that unfolded at the time. Even though it was never brought up again under any circumstances by either one of my parents, it’s something that always stuck with me. I can’t say it’s a memory that I tried to suppress seeing as it was always there at the back of my mind, bothering me like an itch that wouldn’t go away unless properly scratched.

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My kid does 13K in damage to studio equip, we handle it like lunatics.

[Part 1]

Some background:

I’m an audio engineer and score arranger full time in my self-owned business. It’s how I provide for myself, my fiancée (also CF), and my mother. I record, mix, and master for bands, voice-overs for local commercials, and write music for people’s weddings, college films, indie games, etc.. It was my passion since I was a child and every day I ask myself why I get paid to do what I do.

You know, until today.

I had a woman schedule to come in because she wanted me to record her monologue for an acting class. I thought it was going to be easy enough. I set up a mic and a music stand in the sound booth and got my workstation prepped for tracking. She was supposed to show up at 3:30, so when 4:00 came around, I called her to ask her if she was still coming. It was my last contract for the day and I was wanting to get home to my fiancée, dogs, and dinner.

“Oh, sorry sweetie, I’m going to be there soon. I just had to get my son from ex-boyfriend.”

Uh oh.

4:12, she showed up with her child.

To preface, I’ve never really wanted kids, and don’t really hate them either. But I’ve been childfree of mind for a decade now in league of several bad child experiences in public.

Anyway, I sat her down at the conference table and tried to talk to her about the contract and billing, etc., and just couldn’t because of the six-years-old pile of ovary droppings next to her.

“Mommy it’s cold in here.” “Mommy, I’m bored.” “Mommy, that guy has girl hair.” “Mommy, I want to play on the phone.”

The incessant whining went on for the entirety of the discussion. She did nothing about it. I had an ache in my stomach that this might be a rough session.

I was right.

I showed her to the sound booth, positioned the mic at face level, told her the basics of mic use, and then she floored me with a question.

“Can my son stay in there with you while I do this?” I insisted that he wait in the conference room (across the hall from the control room) because the control room wasn’t a very kid-friendly place considering the 120K of equipment at arms reach.

“But he’s a little angel.”

I shouldn’t have taken her word for it. I SHOULD NOT have taken her word for it. This kid was ANYTHING but. I let him in, told him to sit in one of the office chairs and don’t touch anything. Needless to say, he touched. I queued the recording arm and signaled her to start. She got three lines into her take before I hear a deafening screech and crash.

That little shit machine had just knocked over a $4,000 Korg into a rack with $9,500 of equipment. Completely shattered the touchscreen on the Korg, busted the dials off of half of the effects, and totaled my distressor that I use for almost all the vocals I track.

All of this, by the way, was the room’s length apart from where I told the crotch goblin to stay.

The kid, because of the loud noise, started full-lung screaming. Not crying. Not yelling. Screaming.

The mother, with no hesitation, ran over to the control room and DEMANDED to know what I did to her child. She cussed at me and accused me of hurting her little snot monster. Threatened to sue and even swung at me. When I told her that her precious angel had just racked up at least twelve grand of damages, she said “good”, spit on me, then stormed out, slamming every door on the way. So I pulled the security camera footage and had filed a police report. Grand total: $13,504.25. I also mailed her the bill for her session for good measure.

Of six years in the studio, this is my only truly terrible experience. Fuck mombies. Fuck having children. Thanks for making my vasectomy decision that much easier on me.

[Part 2]

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Basically, This is Basically What Every Dr. Phil Episode is Basically Like Basically
  • Dr. Phil: Hello, I am Doctor Philip, and today we'll be tackling an issue that is very widespread, but rarely spoken about. Gaming addiction. Now, I know many of you know at least one person in your life who plays video games, whether that be a child or, in some cases, a spouse.
  • Audience: *laughs*
  • Dr. Phil: But, when unregulated, gaming can lead to serious addiction. Today I have with me a mother who's home life has been torn apart as her very own son descended into gaming addiction.
  • Mother: *sniffing and wiping tears away* Hello, doctor. Will you cure my son?
  • Dr. Phil: Well, dear, that's... uhh. Let's just bring the boy out already.
  • *dramatic music plays*
  • Gamer: My name is Gregg, I'm 19 years old, I'm a gaming addict, and I don't give a f*ck.
  • Audience: *gasps*
  • Gamer: Yeah, I game for 19 to 20 hours a day and the other four hours I use for looking up sick gaming strats or beating it to anime porn. I once sucked off a dude because he offered me minecraft diamonds. I don't give a sh*t, I would've sucked him off even if he didn't have the diamonds.
  • Audience: *gasps louder*
  • Gamer: Do I hate women? Yes, I hate women. I've emailed Anita Sarkeesian my address. She knows where I am if she wants to fight me. Feminists, square the fuck up. People always ask why I don't do anything other than gaming. I ask them why don't they mind their own f*cking business. I don't think I have a problem. Dr. Phil can honestly eat my whole an*s.
  • Gamer: *walks out onto the stage*
  • Audience: *boos*
  • Gamer: F*ck all y'all! I don't give a f*ck! *flips off the audience*
  • Dr. Phil: Please take a seat, son.
  • Gamer: *sits very disrespectfully*
  • Mother: *starts bawling*
  • Dr. Phil: Son, do you think that was acceptable behavior?
  • Gamer: The only behavior I care about is the behavioral patterns for enemies in the S.T.A.L.K.E.R. series. I love video games: Master chief, Mario, uhm, Blinx the Cat... Blasto. Love those guys!
  • Audience: *boos*
  • Gamer: I don't care! You think I care! F*ck all y'all!
  • Dr. Phil: All these people are booing you, doesn't that make you feel bad?
  • Gamer: Are you deaf? Have I not articulated the fact that I absolutely 100% do not care about anything except for video games? I. DON'T. GIVE. A. F*CK.
  • Mother: He's always like this, there's no changing him. It didn't used to be this way... just *starts bawling harder*
  • Dr. Phil: I think there is a way to change him, and we'll find out more about that after these messages.
  • *Dr. Phil theme plays*
  • *The lights dim and every goes empty eyed and slack-jawed*
  • Gamer: Heh, this is weird. *nudges mom and whispers to her* Hey, we're getting paid for this, right. Hey, mom? ...Mom?
  • Mother: *completely unresponsive*
  • Dr. Phil: *completely unresponsive*
  • Audience: *completely unresponsive*
  • Gamer: Heh... this is REALLY weird. *looks around nervously*
  • Audience member: Hey!
  • Gamer: Huh?
  • Audience Member: I'm in the audience! Over here! My arms are strapped to the chair! You have to help me!
  • Gamer: *runs to the audience member*
  • Audience Member: Thank god, I thought I was the only one here left with any brains.
  • Gamer: *hastily undoing the straps* What the fuck is going on?
  • Audience Member: I don't know, but this definitely isn't Dr. Phil's show.
  • Gamer: Then what is it?
  • Audience Member: No clue, but we have to get out of here before the commercial breaks ends.
  • Gamer: *successfully undoes the straps*
  • Audience Member: C'mon! Let's go. *grabs the gamer by the arm*
  • Gamer: *resists* Wait a fucking minute. Why am I supposed to trust you?
  • Audience Member: Because I'm normal and everyone else is braindead if you haven't noticed.
  • Gamer: Yeah, but I'm not going anywhere until I know what's going on. Being on Dr. Phil is a huge opportunity for me to, y'know, advertise my brand. I'm a gamer if you haven't noticed.
  • Audience Member: Are you insane? Have you had a look around you? Does this anything happening right now seem normal to you? Who cares about your "brand". Do you even remember how you got here?
  • Gamer: Well... now that you mention, I can't really remember exactly.
  • Audience Member: Yeah, now let's get the fuck out of here.
  • *the gamer and audience member run through the back exit into the hallways*
  • *the Dr. Phil theme blares as the show returns from commercial break*
  • Gamer: My ears!
  • Audience Member: Move it! *jerks gamer's arm*
  • Gamer: Okay, calm down.
  • *the entire audience screams in unison*
  • Gamer: What the fuck is that!?
  • Audience Member: It's the reason we're running! Quick, in here!
  • *the duo duck into a cramped broom closest*
  • Gamer: Listen, you have to tell me what the fuck is going on right now!
  • Audience Member: Shh.
  • Gamer: Don't shush me!
  • Audience Member: *covers the gamer's mouth*
  • *agonized screaming and violently rumbling passes by the broom closest*
  • Gamer: Holy shit!
  • Audience Member: Stop yelling.
  • Gamer: How can I not yell when it sounds the gates of hell just passed by us!
  • Audience Member: You want it to turn back around and find us?
  • Gamer: Alright. I'll calm down... I'll. *start sobbing*
  • Audience Member: Please, please stop crying. You're too loud.
  • Gamer: I can't! I'm under a lot of stress!
  • Audience Member: You'll be dead if you don't shut the fuck.
  • Gamer: I never wanted any of this, I just wanted to go on Dr. Phil so people would recognize me on YouTube and I could become a popular Let's Player!
  • Audience Member: If you don't shut up right now, I'll-
  • *a snake bites the audience member's neck*
  • Audience Member: *eyes roll up*
  • Gamer: *screams like a baby*
  • *snakes slither under the closet door*
  • Gamer: *stumbles out of the closet and falls into hallway covered with snakes* Fuck me! Fuck me!
  • Gamer: *attempts to run away but falls beneath the snakes and into and empty void*
  • *agonized screaming echoes from all around*
  • Gamer: Am I in hell? I have to be in hell. You don't fall through a pool of snakes and wind up anywhere else but hell.
  • Dr. Phil: THERE IS NO HELL.
  • Gamer: Doc, is that you? If this isn't hell then where am I?
  • Dr. Phil: YOU'RE IN MY REALM SON. *Dr. Phil's face appears glowing in the distance, his eyes are empty sockets and his mouth hangs open*
  • Gamer: What the fuck are you?
  • Dr. Phil: I'M DOCTOR PHILIP.
  • Gamer: You're not Dr. Phil!
  • Dr. Phil: I NEVER SAID I WAS, SON. *a wall of gray human bodies lights up surrounding Dr. Phil's massive head, dr. phil's giant snake body slithers towards the gamer and opens its third eye* I'M DOCTOR PHILIP.
  • *the wall of bodies screams in unison as Dr. Phil devours the gamer*
  • *Dr. Phil theme plays loudly*
  • Dr. Phil: THE NEXT EPISODE IS STARTING. I'M LATE. *slithers into the wall of bodies and his snake body slowly transforms into a normal Dr. Phil's body*
  • Dr. Phil: *crawls onto the stage*
  • Dr. Phil: *dusts himself off* Woo, I went on quite an adventure.
  • Audience: *laughs*
  • Dr. Phil: I'm glad we can all find some time in our lives to laugh, but today's episode is covering something that is most certainly not a laughing matter. It's one of the most serious addictions striking America today and it's rarely talked about. I'm talking about people who love to pee on their mattresses and then pay people exorbitant amounts of money to suck their disgusting mattresses clean.
  • Audience: ... *someone clears their throat*
  • Dr. Phil: What's the matter?
  • Cameraguy: Spsss, Doc. That's not what the episode is about. It's about people with terrible gambling issues.
  • Dr. Phil: Oh, ah, fuck! Cut to commercial!
He tries to make you jealous (Zach Dempsey)

shit, so i’ve been in love with thirteen reasons why recently. it’s got me hooked. zach dempsey has been one of my crushes on the show, so here’s one based on this prompt. i’d love taking suggestions! ring me up if you have any ideas- or, better yet, drop by my ask if you want me to make any more for you.

prompt: “i like you a lot, so i tried getting you jealous,” ft. zachary dempsey

Originally posted by pitterpratter


“Ah shit, Y/N,” Jess Davis groans as she wiggles into the tight row of cushioned chairs, trying to make her way to the middle of the line next to you. You giggle as the popcorn spills all around her clenched hand and into the laps of everyone nearby. There are whimpers of “Sorry, sorry!” and grunts before she finally lands into the cushioned chair next to you and sighs. “Ah Jesus, I didn’t know that would be so hard.”

"Maybe you should lay off the gummy worms,” You put in, and laugh as she glares at you and hits your arm. Your hand digs in the popcorn and you stuff a handful into your mouth, the satisfying crunch as you chew making you moan. Ah, popcorn. Jess rips open a pack of the gummies and snorts at you. “Maybe save those noises for Dempsey, hon.”

You choke on a kernel as she purses her lips trying not to laugh, her eyes steadying on the previews onscreen. A few snickers make it out either way, and you scowl at her and stuff more handfuls in your mouth.

Zach Dempsey and you, to put it lightly, were not friends. It was difficult to push you into a room together and not expect a night of sour jabs and endless bickering. Everyone at school knew it, and it was something that happened way before you were even freshmen. There was never a time you weren’t at each other’s throats. One time, he’d spilled liquor down the front of your dress at some party and you’d hidden his pants in a bush while he was in the hot tub later that night. Lately it’d been more of a joke between your friends, with Jessica mockingly swooning how romantic you two would be. 

The lights start to dim and you wiggle back into your seat, ready for some good old romcom- and then the Paramount clip cuts into black for a moment, making you groan and try to dodge whoever was blocking your view. You crane your entire body and glare daggers at the idiot who interrupted your film before it even started. You loved your movies, and you were pretty serious about getting the “full movie theatre experience” (which Jess liked to mock). Please, you were paying a good four dollars for a movie you could watch for free online. Your eyes rise up to the back of his head, taking in a mess of straight black hair, broad shoulders and the school’s infamous Letterman jacket hanging on them. You memorized the back of that head. You knew those shoulders.

It was Zach Dempsey. With him were Jason Friar and Justin Foley, all wearing their Lettermans. You felt Jess shift in her seat at the sight of them. Wrapped in Zach’s arm was a smaller girl, snuggled into his shirt and playing with his fingers around her neck. They scooched into the seats almost directly in front of you, with the girl turning her head suddenly and getting the tips of her ponytail in Zach’s mouth. He swats it away, annoyed, but smiles instantly when she turns her head to look at him.

“Oh no,” You moan, making Jess snicker at you. You don’t miss the way her eyes flicker to Foley and turn away. “Just what I needed.”

"Who’s the girl?” Jess wonders, squinting. “Not a cheerleader. That’s Jenny, I think. Or her friend Bryana. I can’t be sure. We have Com with them.”

"Ugh, who cares,” You roll your eyes and try to turn to the movie. As long as they don’t ruin your film. This was some good stuff showing- if you focused enough, maybe you could ignore them. Jess shrugs and follows suit. You take a sip of your cherry cola as Martin Freeman jogs up into the scene.

The movie drifts by, but you find that you don’t enjoy it as much as you would have. Your eyes keep landing on the back of Dempsey’s head- and as much as you hated it, his arm around the girl’s. Your popcorn started tasting sour. You focus on some surfer guy’s abs an hour in but your mind keeps drifting somewhere else. Suddenly, before you can even blink, Zach cranes his neck slowly and looks directly at you, as if he knew you were there the entire time. He catches you looking and his cheeks tinge pink as he whips back around. Jess snickers. “That’s like, the fourth time he’s done that.”

"What?” You blink. Wouldn’t you have noticed? Jess takes a slurp of her drink. “Yeah, didn’t you notice? I mean, he’s had like two bathroom breaks. Both times he’d looked right at you before he took his seat.”

You decide not to say anything and reach out for a gummy worm. You keep watch, but Zach never craned his head again.

The movie ends before you know it, and Jess is a mess. You can’t stop laughing at her state, and after a while she laughs with you and dabs at her tears with paper napkins, but her mascara’s everywhere. “Shit, Y/N, why aren’t you crying with me?” She scowls, and starts hicupping. You try to hide your smile. You find it best not to tell her that you were staring at other things than the movie.

The lights flick back on and the people file out. You grab your empty popcorn buckets and leave, but not before Jess excuses herself to the comfort room to freshen up. You drop the buckets in the trash can near the snacks counter in the lobby and wait for her, waving a hand at Hannah Baker, who was filling up drinks at the soda fountain. Your hand travels to your back pocket and realize your phone is missing, so you run back into the cinema’s swinging doors hoping not to find it lodged in between seats with a wad of chewed up gum.

You find something even more tramautizing. Sitting on Zach Dempsey’s lap was his date, clutching his face with her pale hands and making out with him. He’s fidgeting in his seat, but trying to keep still. You note that his hands are on the cup holders and not on her waist. Your face screws up and you groan in disgust, picking your phone up from floor. “Christ, Dempsey, get a room.”

Zach’s eyes widen and he scrambles up, pushing the girl out of his lap. “Yeah? Well, this was an empty room ‘til you showed up, Y/N.”

You snort, tucking your phone into your back pocket. “You’re a pig, Dempsey.” There are mumbles of "Ooh”’s from Foley as you stalk back to the entrance, where Jess was waiting for you, ready for some milkshakes at Rosie’s. You loop your arm in hers, failing to hear the “Shit, man,” and swears from inside the theatre.

-

You head into school next Monday with a great start, munching on your bagel as you make it to your locker. You’re wearing an oversized hoodie and high waisted jeans, but it doesn’t stop the jocks from whistling when you pass by. You roll your eyes at them and chew on your bagel as you turn the corner. High school boys were too immature. No wonder you never found the want to date one.

Passing by you in the hallway was Zach Dempsey, crowded with his band of loud friends who are laughing and pushing each other. You meet his eye and he stops, slinging his backpack over his shoulder. You roll your eyes and look away, and you can almost hear him sigh in defeat. Someone slaps him on the shoulder and whistles as you walk by. “Daaamn, Dempsey, you gotta let us share.” You don’t see him shove the guy and stalk off.

The first half of the day passes by like a breeze. By the time fourth period ends, you barely feel like the day has started. You head out for the cafeteria, stacking all your books in your arms and making it through the door, but it wasn’t long before you could hear footsteps running after you. “Hey, wait up, Y/N!”

You turn around and groan, continuing to walk. “Dempsey.” You try not to glance as he jogs up next to you and ruffles his hair, staring at you with this half grin of his you didn’t want to admit you liked.

“Uh, hey.” “Something you need?”

“No, uh, actually, I wanted to talk to you.” He looks at you sheepishly.

“Okay, talk.”

“Um, you look nice today,” He offers, biting his cheek. You stop, staring at him in disgust. “What?” He trails. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding with me.” You shake your head in disbelief and keep walking.

“What’s wrong?” He keeps up. “Seriously, Dempsey, are you hitting on me now?” “And why would that be so terrible?”

“Geez, Dempsey, what is wrong with you?” You deadpan. “You are such an ass, you know that? Do you always treat girls like shit?” You gape at his blank face. “Jenny. From last Saturday. You think it’s OK to throw girls around like that?”

“What? No! I- uh, Jenny and I aren’t serious, if that’s what you’re thinking.” He winces, scratching his neck.

“Yeah, right. Of course not.”

“Look, can I take you out this weekend? To Rosie’s maybe? I’ve wanted to maybe get to be with you out of school. We could go to the movies?” You’re at the cafeteria doors now, but Zach shuts them with his left arm, blocking the way in front of you. You snort. “You can’t be serious.” You watch as his face falls and his mouth twitches.

“What’s so bad about going out with me?”

“God, you are such a jerk, Zach!” You groan, throwing your free hand in exasperation. He winces at the sound of his name being used so hatefully- he’s only ever heard you say Dempsey. He tries to forget about all the times he’s dreamed of his name coming out of your mouth, but decides he hates it when you yell it at him. “You think it’s fun, don’t you? Having no respect for girls whatsoever. You get off buttering them up with kisses and flowers and take them to the movies only to ignore them completely a day or two later. Who, in their right mind, would ever want to go out with someone like you?”

“I only ever wanted to go to that fucking movie theatre because I heard you were going to be there!” His voice rises to a shout. It echoed through the halls, and you wince knowing someone would hear. “You think I wanted to watch that stupid chick flick, with all that shit about high heels and prom? Fuck, I never even liked Jen! Why would I when I’ve always wanted someone else?”

His breath was heavy. Suddenly it was hard to swallow. You try to stand your ground, staring at him. “Nice one. You think it’d be easy for me to believe that, what with your list of conquests and a new girl making out on your desk each week? You must be daft, Zach Dempsey.”

He scowls. “I never wanted them. Never. I just- I just thought that maybe if you saw that everyone wanted me, just maybe you would have wanted me too.” His face softens, and he starts fiddling with his fingers. “Okay, I get it. You could never want me. I know, I just thought I could change that somehow. I’m used to getting my way, you know. Girls flock me, throw themselves at me. I’m used to getting everything I want, but then you’re here, in front of me, and fuck, I’ve never wanted to kiss anything more in my life.”

“Okay,” You say softly, before you can stop yourself. He barely hears it, but his ears perk up. “What’d you say?”

“I said okay,” You clear your throat, and bite your lip to keep yourself from smiling as his lips form into a helpless grin. “Saturday night, Rosie’s?”
“Fuck yes!” He fistbumps the air, then stops as soon as he realises you’re still in front of him. You giggle and hide your face in your hands as he leans forward without thinking, grabbing you by the waist and lifting you in the air. You couldn’t help your cheeks from turning red. Zach Dempsey was adorable. He really was.

“Okay, I’ll see you in Trig?” He asks, palming his phone in his front pocket. He’d have to tell Foley, he was thinking. Man, his best friend would be so proud. His head was rushing when he swooped in and pressed his lips to your flushed cheek. “I can’t wait.”




thanks for sticking around! give this a heart and reblog if you want more, and follow my blog if you want to be notified overtime i post a new imagine! this is a brand new blog and i’m so excited to see what ideas you might have for me.

Sexting (Jimin smut)

Originally posted by minblush


Summary: On a lonely night, you decide to sign up for an anonymous sexting site. Of course you are matched with the notorious fuckboy you’re constantly trying to avoid. Park fucking Jimin.

Themes: Sexting, Fuckboy Jimin, College AU.

Pairing: You x Jimin

Word Count: 4k

This fic contains: Explicit and graphic depictions of smut, sex over the phone, swearing. 


ENTER USERNAME:

Cleopatra123

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?

Male/Female

WHERE ARE YOU FROM?

I’d rather not say/enter here:

WHAT ARE YOU INTERESTED IN?

Decent conversation/making friends/finding a language buddy/other

PLEASE INDICATE YOUR AGE PREFERANCE:

19-24

CLICK ‘CHAT’ TO BE MATCHED WITH A PARTNER!

YOU HAVE BEEN MATCHED WITH ‘THOR562’.

THOR562: 21 years old- Seoul, South Korea- also interested in ‘other’.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO CHAT?

Yes/No

YOU ARE NOW IN A CHAT WITH THOR562, ENJOY!


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BRACELET

Imagine starts at 55 seconds.

“You guys having fun?”

The thousands of cheers from around the sold out stadium echoes through the cool night, every single one directed towards Justin. It’s kind of crazy to think about it - that people literally spend hundreds of dollars just to see him from what probably is a shitty seat at the back of an arena, but at the same time its flattering, and by now I bet his rather used to it.

“I don’t know if you guys heard me, Are you guys having fun tonight?!” He repeats into the mic, fiddling with the gold chain bracelet around his hand.

Once again the stadium filled with screams and cheers from the beliebers, this time twice as loud. I watch as Justin let his eyes drift over to the side of the arena, and decides to yell “Top row, you guys having up there?!” And they continue to cheer.

Then the other side, “What about this side, you guys having fun up there?!”

A small smile fell onto his face as he leans back and removes the gum from his mouth muttering, “Alright, as long as were having fun. Just livin’ the moment.”

Then continues to move forward and lightly strum the first notes to Cold Water. A second later his hand moves back to his mouth, placing the gum he removed earlier back inside. I can’t help but roll my eyes at my boyfriends indecisiveness. Once more he continues to strum the guitar before for the third time, removing his hand and looking down onto the chain.

“This damn bracelet is annoying.”

Suddenly moving his wrist towards the guitar and using his bracelet to tap the strings while saying, “You see all this noise, I don’t like that noise. It sounds wrong. I’m not diggin’ it.”

I can’t help but smile. Its so cute when he just speaks his mind, and I can tell the crowd feels the same since I do notice a few people chuckling up the front.

Turning towards the wings of the stage, where Scooter, I and the backstage crew are all standing, he jokingly adds, “See Y/N this is your fault - Giving me this bracelet.”

After fumbling around with it for a while trying to remove it, he grumbles “Stupid bitch.” Under his breath, causing not only me but the crowd to laugh. “One second guys.” He announces.

While still attempting to take off the bracelet I bought him for our 3 year anniversary, he decides to make a witty joke, beginning it with, “Why did the chicken cross the road?”

The crowd actually responded with a whole lot of “Why’s?” And justin immediately respondes with “He wanted to get to the other side.”

A small smile cracks his lips as the crowd chuckles at his terrible joke and even chose to acknowledge how dumb it was by adding, “That was stupid.” then adds “but it was funny.”

Finally giving up, his head shoots up to look around the crowd asking “Does someone wanna come help me get this off my wrist?”

Girls from the crowd shoot up and cheer immediately with there hands in the air. As for Justin who is still sitting and waiting for someone come to his rescue. Scooter waists no time in suddenly beginning to push on my back, motioning me forward.

“What?”

“Go help him.” He demands with a smirk.

“What?!” My eyes trail down my body, instinctively cringing at my purpose sweatpants and staff hoodie I chose to wear. I looked terrible. “Nah-ah. No way.”

“Who cares about what your wearing, go help him!” He chuckles.

“I care! Plus I don’t wanna just walk out on stage! That’s scary.” I pout but scooter shows no remorse.

“Just go!” He puts his arms on my shoulders and pushes me out onto the stage. This time, I can’t turn back because by the way every one in the crowd has heightened there screams, they’ve definitely seen me.

I sigh and mentally note ‘there no turning back now’ before jogging forward over to the seat Justin was seated on by the edge. Justin’s eyes trail around the stage, looking for the reason the screams in the crowd have increased, and once seeing me making my way over, smiles and extends a hand for me to grab.

I don’t hesitate to reach for his gesture and quickly dash over to remove this bracelet as fast as I can so I can get off the stage as soon as possible. At first, Justin is no help at all. Instead, he begins rubbing my arm and trying to get me to sit and stay next to him. “Justin, stop fidgeting.” I laugh.

Justin shrugs his shoulders as if not having any idea what I was talking about before settling and begins cooperating with the process. This bracelet is so damn stubborn! But after some pull and tug, Justin says, “Pull it from this side.”

“Yeah, and you unclip it from over there.”

The crowd aw’s in affection at our teamwork.

As we work together and finally get the bracelet removed, I jump up in achievement and grab a hold of the bracelet myself. As I’m about to make my way back off stage, Justin grabs my arm and pulls me back pouting. “Stay.”

I chuckle nervously and take a glance at the screaming crowd in anticipation, finally turning back to Justin to shake my head.

“Oh c'mon!” He encourages, grabbing my hip and pulling me towards him. I fall onto the seat beside him, my back pressed against his side while his arm rest around my waist. “Have a little fun. I’ll sing you a nice sooong.” He coo’s as if I was a child. “give you a little kiiiss. We can cuddllle.”

“Shut up.” I chuckle to which Justin smiles.

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

Meanwhile, the crowd has hit the fan, their cheers going wild in a frenzy of excitement. Justin places his arm around my shoulders while using his hand to hold the right notes on the guitar neck. His other hand strumming lightly at the body.

After commenting about how terribly the guitar is tuned, he finally begins singing Cold water in a soft, melodic tone.

“Everybody gets high sometimes you know…What else can we do when were feelin’ low? - C'mon sing it with me baby!”

I chuckle at his enthusiasm and decide to not ruin the song and just keep my mouth shut, but frozen with a smile.

“So I wanna lay with you told I’m old!” He sang, causing my to furrow my eyebrows in confusion.

“Baby you sang it wrong.” I whispered into his side.

Still strumming the guitar, he looks over at me “Really? I did? Well then how does it go?”

“It goes, ’What else can we do when were feelin’ low? So take a deep breath and let it go -…” I quickly sing as Justin smirks.

I hadn’t realised that justin had actually moved the mic towards me, causing my voice to echo throughout the entire arena, the crowd cheering like crazy in the background while Justin smirked menacingly.

“Hey!” I pouted. “You stuffed the lyrics on purpose!”

“How’d you know?” He chuckled sarcastically. “Well, since you started it you gotta finish. C'mon baby lets go!”

With a sigh, I finally decided to just give in and continue with Justin. “And if you feel your sinking….”

I really like you, you know? (Zach Dempsey x Reader)

Request: “Can I request a fic with Zach where the reader and Zach are snapchatting. The reader is really sleepy because she’s been staying up late to get homework done and being so tired, she accidently tells Zach she likes him a lot. (Can it be fluffy and a little angsty?)”

————————————

It was still 4:30p.m., but you were already tired and longing for your bed. You tried really hard to keep your eyes open, but they had their way of beating you. Finally, you gave up. You got up from the table you were occupying on the school’s library, picked up your stuff and walked home.

The second you got into your room, you took of your shoes and slowly climbed into your bed. You hadn’t even closed your eyes yet when your phone lighted up and buzzed.

“How hard is it for a girl to get her beauty sleep in this wicked world?” you mumbled like a real drama queen, talking to the walls. You reached out lazily for your phone and, suddenly, all your complains went away. The top notification was a Snapchat from Zach Dempsey.

After waiting a while (in your mind, opening it up too quickly would make him think you were desperate), you finally saw his chat. It was just random letters, probably sent by mistake. You rolled your eyes, not believing you created all that expectation in your head. What were you thinking? That Zach freaking Dempsey snapchatted you saying he was madly crushing you?

You sent a question mark back and put your phone away. It only took five seconds for it to buzz again.

“You have got to be kidding me”

You didn’t want to look, all you wanted was a nice nap. Your curiosity spoke louder, and you picked it back up.

Zach Dempsey: Oh hello Y/N this is Zach and I stare at your Snapchat stories like an idiot
Zach Dempsey: I’m lovesick because of uuuuuu
Zach Dempsey: let me be the juliet to your romeo
Zach Dempsey: I’m juliet coz I’m a little girl

You realized it was one of his friends joking around, and laugh softly. You decided to mess around too.

You: I knew it.
Zach Dempsey: that I’m a little girl????
You: oh yeah. it’s common knowledge.

Video call from : Zach Dempsey

You didn’t expect this. You didn’t know if you should pick up or not. You decided to go on with the game, so you fixed your hair and made sure you looked okay. You pressed “answer” and Justin Foley’s face showed up on the screen. It looked like they were at the gymnasium, probably practicing basketball.

“Yo Dempsey! I got your phone man” Justin yelled, and the camera focused on Zach, who was standing at the other side of the gym. “You shouldn’t have told me your password!”

“Dude what are you doing?” Zach rushed over and tried to get his phone out of Justin’s hands. You giggled and, with that sound, Dempsey just stopped moving. “Foley. What was that?”

Justin showed him the screen, and his eyes widened when he saw your face.

“Well hello there” you said, not knowing what to do.

“Y/N, hi. I-uh, hang on, I’ll call you back okay?” The screen went black and his face disappeared. You waited for the call and, since it didn’t came, you tried to sleep again. Unsuccessfully, you should add.

Grumbling, you kicked your covers away, picked up your books and started studying again in your desk.

———

You were so entertained by your homework you almost missed the notification from Zach. Almost. You unlocked your phone and checked it out.

Zach Dempsey: Hey, I’m sorry for earlier. Justin is an idiot
You: It’s okay 😂

You weren’t really expecting an answer after that, but fortunately it came.

Zach Dempsey: well anyway
Zach Dempsey: wyd?

You gave the pile of papers and books in front of you a sad glance.

You: homework. u?
Zach Dempsey: just chillin I guess

You sighed, jealous of his procrastination.

You: let’s trade please, I can’t stand biology anymore
Zach Dempsey: send all the bio stuff for me. I’ll do it for you, I love bio

What a cutie. He loved bio.

You: don’t give me ideas, Dempsey. I’ll send it for real
Zach Dempsey: lol
Zach Dempsey: you can come over some day and I’ll give you a hand

Oh my god. Zach invited you to his place. You and him, at his house. What a time to be alive.

You: that would be nice :)
Zach Dempsey: so… I’m sorry if that’s like way too intrusive but I wanna ask something
You: dear lord… shoot

Your heart skipped a beat. Was he really going to ask you out?

Zach Dempsey: are you and colin jensen a thing?

Well, apparently not. No dates for miss (Y/N) and mr Zach Dempsey.

You: who tf is colin jensen?
Zach Dempsey: you know, skinny dude who works at crestmont

You let out a loud laugh.

You: you mean clay jensen?
Zach Dempsey: probably
Zach Dempsey: anyway
Zach Dempsey: are you guys together?
You: no sir

The conversation just went on and on, and you liked Zach more and more by the second. He was sweet and funny, and talking to him was just so nice… but you really, really needed to sleep.

You: hey, I gotta go
Zach Dempsey: why??
You: I need some sleep
Zach Dempsey: it’s eight o'clock my lady

My lady. Jesus Christ.

You: I know
You: but I didn’t sleep last night
Zach Dempsey: what were you up to?
You: at a date with my usual partner
Zach Dempsey: 🤔
Zach Dempsey: usual partner?
You: homework
Zach Dempsey: oh, I see
Zach Dempsey: but can’t you stay just a little longer?
You: that’s not a very good idea
You: sleep deprived (Y/N) usually talks more than she should
Zach Dempsey: one more reason why you should stick around w me
Zach Dempsey: this conversation is about to get interesting
Zach Dempsey: stay pleease

Well, he was asking… you guessed it couldn’t be that bad staying up just a few more minutes.

You: okay, I’ll give you some extra time
You: what do you wanna talk about?
Zach Dempsey: let’s play a game

Uh-oh.

You: what kind of game?
Zach Dempsey: nothing special, just asking each other some questions
You: ok fine, you go first
Zach Dempsey: I’ll take it easy on you because it’s the first question
Zach Dempsey: we’re just warming up
Zach Dempsey: what’s your favorite color?

You laughed again.

You: how original my man
You: green
Zach Dempsey: I’m one of a kind
Zach Dempsey: your turn
You: I’m not extending the courtesy of taking it easy, sorry
You: are you and justin dating?

He sent you a picture of his face. He was frowning, trying to cover a smile.

Zach Dempsey: you’re lame. that’s a terrible question, and the answer is no
You: that was a valid question
Zach Dempsey: there will be a payback
Zach Dempsey: you better believe in karma
Zach Dempsey: my question is why are you single

You didn’t really understood the question. You rubbed your eyes and yawned.

You: what do you mean
Zach Dempsey: I mean, you’re beautiful and smart and funny and I just don’t get how can you not have a boyfriend

You froze. Before you could realize the huge mistake you were making, you sent him the most stupid confession ever.

You: I couldn’t date anyone because you’re the one that I like, and it’s like a lot

Your eyes widened when your own words sunk in. You really should have stopped the conversation when you had the chance. Damn it, damn it, damn it. You waited anxiously for his answer. He opened the chat, visualized your message and…

He ignored it.

You even waited a few minutes but there was no response. “Well, congratulations (Y/N), you ruined everything as usual”, you thought, and climbed up your bed. You picked up your blankets from the floor and covered your ashamed and self loathing body.

It felt like you had just fallen asleep when a noise woke you up. Scared, you almost fell on the floor. It sounded like… knocks?

You picked up a baseball bat you kept on the floor (just for hitting strangers because you couldn’t even play any sports) and looked around. Suddenly, you saw Zach outside your window.

“Oh my god!” you whispered, in shock, and opened the lock so he could come inside. “What are you doing here? Jesus I only have my pajamas on!”

You covered yourself with your arms, which made Zach laugh.

“I came here because I wanted to know if what you said was true. You know, the I-like-you-a-lot thing” he asked in a serious tone.

“God just forget I said it, it’s embarrassing really” you looked away from him.

“I don’t think so”

“Well, that’s because you don’t have feelings for someone who doesn’t like you back” you whispered, trying not to get your parents attention.

Suddenly, Zach’s hands were on your waist and he pulled you close, with nothing but an inch of air between your bodies. Your heart started beating like crazy. One of his hands went up to your jaw and caressed it. His fingers made their way to your lips, separating them.

“Who said anything about not liking back?” he whispered too, and then pressed his lips against yours.

——————————–

Sooo I hope you liked it, I’m sorry if it’s different from what you expected!

The Only Exception (Part 3)

Summary: AU. Reader is given the task of running a popular love advice internet show when her coworker is fired. Her cynical attitude toward love makes her offer some harsh advice, and more than a few hearts are caught in the aftermath. Will hers be one of them?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 3,523

Warnings: language, fluff, wishful thinking, hot firemen, sarcasm, cynicism, bad jokes, drinking, sad story retelling (mentions of death and loss)

A/N: Moving right along…and yes, I used a Keep Reading line. Also, shout out to @redgillan for making my day brighter.

Part - 1 - 2 - 3 - 4

Originally posted by kittyseb

Keep reading

✧:・*i need u | two*:・✧

Description: Taehyung catches the attention of the one curious girl.

Genre: Angst

Mentions of: swearing, partying, drinking, violence, gangs, smoking

Word count: 2179

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

part one - part two - part three

“Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.”

Keep reading

It’s April 26th, and it’s hot, unbearably hot. Harry feels like his insides are melting, about ready to ooze out of his body. He doesn’t remember it being this stifling the last time he was deployed; it’s like the heat is magnified, weighing him down, dragging him into the dirt. He’s trying to stay focused, he really is, but he has sweat dripping into his eyes and he’s miserably dehydrated and he feels off balance in every sense of the word. Liam asks if he’s feeling okay, and Harry nods slowly, furrowing his brows, wondering if he’s really that transparent. He feels pathetic, slightly, and weak for being the only one this affected by the 108 degree sun. He forces himself to keep up with Liam’s strides, his gear heavy, and by the time they catch up to Rob and Colin, Harry’s vision is spinning.

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Better as Three Part 1 (M)

Originally posted by got7hoe

**GIF NOT MINE

Mini-series.

Part 2

Characters: Mark Tuan (GOT7) x Im Jaebum (JB, GOT7) x You (OC/Reader)

Genre: Smut, Fluff, Slight Angst, AU (uhm they’re not GOT7 members ok? lmao)

Length:   3,609 words

Plot:  Because of that one rebellious, drunken night, Jaebum and Mark decided to punish you silently by ignoring you and not being affectionate towards you and you are about to burst a nut if this continues.

Warning/s:  VERY DETAILED AND GRAPHIC SMUT AS ALWAYS, Poly!Markbum, Polyamorous relationship, Boy to boy smut, Anal sex, Blowjob, Slight exhibitionism, Slightly drunk sex, Threesome in the next chapter/s, etc.

A/N:  A mini-series that my potato mind came up with in the middle of the night.  This is going to be a 4 part series and I will make sure to finish immediately (haha right).  And also, this fic is not in any way related to my first Markbum fic, (Of Dim Lights and Silent Nights) since this is in an AU setting.  That’s it and yeah so as always I don’t know how to write non-graphic smut because I am a hoe hahaah.  And I’m working on part 2 right away so you won’t need to wait long!!!


10PM.

You checked the wall clock in front of you and sighed heavily.  This is the second night that your boyfriends are coming home later than usual.

Keep reading

Higher (pt 7)

Originally posted by lawlliets

Member: Exo Suho/Junmyeon

Type: Fluff/Angst/Future Smut

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

You clamped your mouth shut, your eyes darting around the room to avoid his gaze. Your fingers scratched the sheets, your heart beating faster as you felt the bed shift. Then there was a feathery touch at your cheek, and you gasped, your eyes snapping back to his as his fingers lightly ran across your jaw. 

“I don’t think you want me to kiss you,” he muttered, his fingers still softly caressing you. “Look at yourself, you’re terrified.” 

Keep reading

shocktrooper-redstreaker  asked:

Tbh I sat up at night once and went "TFP Soundwave is nonverbal and autistic and nobody can tell me otherwise" and then I went to sleep completely satisfied with my brain for the moment

@shocktrooper-redstreaker @aphobic-soundwave @toothlessloveshiccup @agatharights tagging you guys since you all showed particular interest

but let’s talk about both TFP and G1 Soundwave? because pretty much all versions of Soundwave are strongly represented as autistic but those two are the strongest imo

and before anyone says “AUTISM CANT EXIST IN ROBOTS / CYBERTRONIANS / BLAH BLAH” well here’s a canonically autistic transformer!

Please note that this is mostly from my experience as an autistic person. There are MANY symptoms of autism and not every autistic person has them. Every autistic person is different!

If you want to learn more about autism (though I wouldn’t use these sources to write an autistic character – as with that, I would ask advice from actual autistic people), here  are  some  sources.

Also: remember to never use Autism Speaks as a resource/ref. for anything relating to autism! They literally want autistic people dead via eugenics lmao!


G1 (probably the most autistic imo):

  • he’s nonverbal. in G1, he’s shown to be almost exclusively nonverbal or reserved with his speech but then laugh and talk with Megatron, a person he’s comfortable with – autistic people (such as myself) can be quite talkative when around people we’re comfortable with.
  • he’s “socially awkward” - autism literally impedes people in social ability.
  • doesn’t understand most forms of verbal humor. we autistic people have a hard time detecting sarcasm from literal truth, metaphors, and other forms of humor. this is shown lots when the bots/cons make jokes and he’s entirely unresponsive or deadpan. LITERALLY HE ONLY LAUGHS TWICE IN THE ENTIRE G1 SERIES.
    Humor needs to be obvious and straight to the point for Soundwave. He laughs at more physical and obvious forms of humor such as when Starscream shoots at the “robotic plant” and his null ray beam bounces back to hit him and make him fall on his ass. Or when he’s kicking Blaster’s ass.
    Actually those two sources of evidence are the same video just at different times but yeah those are the only two times I can honestly remember that Soundwave’s laughed in canon despite the MANY jokes both the bots and cons have made around him.
  • he has motor skill difficulty. couldn’t find videos for this one so bear with me here. Soundwave in G1 has shown many times to have difficulty in motor skills. you can argue that it was just bad animation but shut up let us have this.
    If you watch G1, whenever the cons are making an escape, pay attention to how Soundwave runs in the bg. He’s clumsy and he almost trips a lot. He runs into things that he could easily jump over. HELL HE EVEN TRANSFORMS AT RANDOM SOMETIMES DURING ESCAPES LIKE WHY YOU DO THAT??
  • He’s monotone. Yeah yeah this is just a “soundwave trait” but lmao listen. Autistic people are terrible with our sense of voice inflections. We’re either too loud or too monotone and “emotionless” with our voices. Do I even have to source “evidence” for this bullshit?
  • he speaks in extremely specific ways. autistic people, when partially nonverbal (which G1 soundwave is), will speak in very specific ways. most of the time it sounds forced or awkward. usually we’re just trying to make sense of things and how to put words into coherent sentences.
    Soundwave speaks awkwardly. This is a simple fact.
    Even in utter panic he still speaks in his peculiar way.
  • he has huge empathy and emotion issues. autism effects people’s perception of emotions and empathy to the point where an autistic person can be blunt and have little to no sense of empathy or emotions (like Soundwave). it’s where one of the ableist myths that “autistic people are emotionless robots” comes from. (on the contrary, however, people with autism can also be hyper-emotional or hyper-empathetic and feel things to a huge extent - which IDW Soundwave also has going on whenever he lets his empath abilities loose).

TFP:

  • he’s nonverbal. like do we even need to debate this one. all soundwave’s are nonverbal and rarely speak.
  • he’s “socially awkward” - autism literally impedes people in social ability.
  • SPECIAL INTERESTS!!!!! TFP Soundwave is KNOWN to be a genius with anything tech related. You could easily argue that this is a special interest regarding tech things.
    (Special Interests (SI for short) are more than just having an intense interest in something. SI’s are specific to autism and mean that an autistic person is hyperfixating on something that interests them. This can lead to an autistic person knowing pretty much everything about a single subject (such as Soundwave with tech stuff) )
  • you could say that he visually stims with the lights on his visor. maybe people think he’s working but really he’s just stimmy. in case you didn’t know, stimming is a repetitive motion or behavior that autistic people (and ADHD people) do in order to relieve stress, focus, etc.
  • he has an “unusual gait” when walking which is actually one of the common traits of autism. he’s slouched and hunched all the time, only straightening out when Megatron is around (probably to show that he’s paying attention).
  • hyperfixates. not only on details to the point where he nitpicks what people say and replays recordings to them if he catches something, but also to the point where he hyperfixates on work almost obsessively. you could call this loyalty but my autistic ass calls it autism lmao.
  • He also has huge empathy and emotion issues, as explained above.

so yeah TLDR Soundwave is hugely represented to be autistic and no one can take autistic soundwave away from me

Kat’s Fic Recs: Sterek (under 10k)

*Yes, yes the first three are over 10k but they’re worth it!

For @prettyinsoulpunk, hope this makes your week better! 💖💖💖

On The Bus by bibliosexxual (13,299)

“Yeah,” Erica says with exaggerated slowness, “I did like Kira, and now I like Boyd. I’m bi.”

“Bi?”

“Bisexual?” Erica prompts. “As in, not gay or straight?”

Stiles is pretty sure his entire mind explodes. “You can like guys and girls? That’s a thing?”

Erica looks at him like, What planet are you from? “Uh, yeah. As long as they’re hot, I don’t care what gender they are.” She pokes him in the side, and he jumps. He’s always been ticklish, and unfortunately Erica knows it. “What about you? You ever like guys, Stilinski?”

*
In which Stiles and Derek ride the bus to school together, and there are bisexual awakenings.

You’ll Grow Into Your Skin by crossroadswrite (11,847)

“So funny story,” Stiles winces, “Remember when I joked you couldn’t get me pregnant?”

Derek nods his head. He remembers pretty much everything from that day.

“Right,” Stiles bobs his head, stops himself and does a little ta-da gesture towards Jacy, “Surprise?”

This is honestly so so cute and heartwarming. I don’t read much mpreg but this was so good and I recommend it 100%.

Word By Word by Cobrilee (11,843)

The first time Derek sees the words, he’s had a really shitty day. Laura was on his case again, all in the name of sisterly love, of course, and Cora was wielding her usual acerbic wit like a rapier. He’d gotten to the scene of a shooting too late and the victim had died before Derek could call for an ambulance. His Camaro had gotten a flat and while he was attempting to change the tire on the side of the road, someone drove by and sent a wave of muddy water arcing, drenching him, and he was cold, muddy, and miserable.

Then, as he was sliding into the front seat after toweling off as best as he could, he felt something prickling on his arm and glanced down. Shaky, thin lines began appearing, little by little, and he could do no more than stare as the infamous phrase formed on his arm.

Are you 18?

‘Til It Hurts or Bleeds or Fades by WeAreTheCyclones (10,731)

“For the peace and happiness of our friends, and that of Beacon Hills at large, can you please give us a warning if you two are ever headed for a nuclear fallout?”

Stiles scoffs. “What are you talking about?”

“The tension between you two rises with each passing year. For awhile there, it seemed to be turning into the sexy kind, but now it feels more like the murder kind.”

No Day But Today by fauvistfly (9,527)

“If you don’t change it successfully, you’ll be doomed to repeat it,” Deaton says, his face impassive despite the seriousness of his words.

“Repeat the day?” Stiles parrots, trying to wrap his head around what they’re attempting to do, the ridiculousness of his life and how it now involves time travel.

in which things in Beacon Hills are so bad that Deaton sends Stiles back in time to stop Kate from manipulating Derek and causing the death of the Hale family. The catch: Stiles only has 24 hours to change the course of the future, or he’ll be stuck repeating that same day until he gets it right. What will be enough to keep Derek away from Kate?

Where Others Fade Away by pr1nc3ssp34ch (9,054)

When the name Grzegorz tattoos itself across Derek’s wrist in neat, thin strokes, his mother pats him on the head in sympathy and Laura laughs so hard she has to go to her room, the sound echoing down the hall as she goes. When it stays there for six years and no such Grzegorz appears, Derek seriously considers moving to Poland.

Meanwhile, on Stiles’ eighteenth birthday when Derek crawls onto his skin, untidy and volatile, Lydia shrieks in sudden realization, and Jackson looks so entirely offended that even Danny can’t kiss him back to normal.

just the touch of a hand by scepticallyopenminded (8,591)

Things – as things often do in Stiles’ life – get a little crazy (a lot crazy) when, a couple of weeks before his seventeenth birthday, he wakes up to – not a wolf, but an amount of naked flesh, cuddled up to him where Dude fell asleep the night before. Stiles screams, a bit, flopping around and falling out of his bed, getting to his knees to see a naked – Derek Hale, sitting up on his bed, eyes wide. He seems to realize something a second later, because he glances down at himself and squeaks, pulling sheets up around him just as Stiles’ dad opens the door.

36 Questions by Leslie_Knope (8,071)

“So I’m doing my senior psych thesis on friendships,” Erica says, not-so-accidentally elbowing Derek in the ribs as she turns to face Stiles. “How they develop, how intimacy is fostered, stuff like that.”

“That’s cool,” Stiles says agreeably. “What’s our part?”

“Well, I can’t really tell you the point because that would influence the results. But it’s a set of 36 questions that you have to ask each other.”

“Just the two of us?” Derek chimes in, finally, and Stiles sighs.

“Okay, dude,” he says, making a face, “could you try not to look quite so offended? Like, my ego’s pretty strong, but come on, man.”

Of Glasses And Lacrosse Sticks by charlesdk (6,810)

“Okay, how 'bout this? One date, just one date, and if you still don’t believe I’m genuinely interested in you, then I’ll leave you alone for good. How does that sound?”

Derek hesitated for another moment, before he sighed and said, “Fine. One date.”

It’s Always Been You by charlesdk (6,085)

Stiles’ love life was practically non-existing, always had been. He was always terrible at picking up clues when people hit on him (it had happened, Erica had been witness to it and had been the one to let him know it was happening in the first place) because he never expected anyone to do so.

He wasn’t the most desirable guy around, he knew that. He was loud, extremely nerdy, never knew when to stop talking, not exactly much of a looker if you asked him, the list was endless.

Point was, he never did know when someone was flirting with him. Which was probably how he ended up in the fight that would change his life for the better.

One Year Down by haleofStilesheart (5,854)

Derek had never celebrated an anniversary before. At least, not an anniversary for a romantic relationship. But now that’s he’s been dating Stiles for a year, that’s about to change.

It’s Too Early For This by thepsychicclam (4,966)

Derek loves his job at the coffee shop, especially because Stiles comes in for coffee before early Saturday morning lacrosse practices. The problem is that Derek is too shy to do anything about his crush, and the situation is not helped by the rivalry between the basketball and lacrosse teams.

I Didn’t Know That I Was Starving (til I tasted you) by LadySlytherin (4,481)

Derek - who lives in New York with his older sister, Laura - is back in Beacon Hills, visiting his parents and younger sister for Christmas, when everything changes. Cora invites friends over while their parents are visiting other family, Derek drinks something he didn’t know he shouldn’t have, and things get a little out of control.

Misunderstandings abound, secrets are spilled, and in the end all it takes to find happiness is being brave enough to reach out with both hands and never let go.

Hello My Old Heart by eversall (3,944)

It begins like this – Stiles is hopelessly lost in the Beacon Hills Library, which has definitely undergone renovations in the last two years, and he’s wandering around trying his best to look like a helpless puppy or something and sure enough, a librarian in a navy blue cashmere sweater and thick-rimmed black glasses shows up, and that librarian happens to be Derek Hale.
Stiles’ heart skips a beat and he suddenly feels like he’s drowning in something unfamiliar, an ache beginning to build in his chest.
.
The pack drifts back together, and Derek in sweaters kind of breaks Stiles a little. In a good way.

A Treatise On The Importance Of Not Ignoring Your Date by LadySlytherin (3,490)

A tumblr-post-based fic, wherein Stiles and Derek have a meet-cute at a baseball game. Involves a kiss-cam, Stiles’ date being an ass, and a hot stranger.

Basically, Peter doesn’t survive the fire so Laura and Derek never go back to Beacon Hills, Scott’s never bitten, Stiles doesn’t know about the supernatural, and he goes to NY for college. Go, Mets!

Thank God Your Heart Is Too Close by hoars (3,469)

There’s a boy, (“Fuck you, dude. I’m seventeen. Not fifteen.” Stiles laughs in his memory) waiting for him back home.

Soulmates tbh by bleep0bleep (1,423)

“It’s been five months,” Derek says darkly. “Why am I still getting these proposals? You know these are probably all fake marks.”

Five months since the paparazzi had snapped that photo of him with the overzealous fan tugging at his shirt, five months since millions of people on the Internet realized that the birthmark revealed was in fact, the mark, five months Derek was inundated by claims from people who desperately wanted him to believe that they were his soul-mate.

Touka and Amon’s Conversation Says More About How They Haven’t Grown

I’ve noticed that I had a vastly different interpretation of the conversation between Touka and Amon then most of the fandom. To be fair the conversation itself seemed okay, until I got to a certain panel. 

Amon’s rhetoric has always been a simplification of a much more complicated situation, but this is an especially glaring example. What exactly about the Daughter arc gave Kureo no choice but to murder Hinami’s mom in the middle of the street in front of her daughter, then use her kakuhou and severed arm to lure that same thirteen year old child into a death trap?

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On Thin Ice *Part 2*

Originally posted by stallingdemons

Gif isn’t mine

IM SCREAMING !!!! You guys totally loved the first part of On Thin Ice, and, as I promised, here is part 2 on Valentine’s day! Hope you guys like this one as much as the first part :)

Summary: After running from the ice rink, Newt comes after you to see why you left in tears.

Warnings: A little bit of angst in the beginning, mentions of blood.

Author: @xfandomqueenblrx (me)

DO NOT post this on other sites and claim it as your work.

Reblogs are fine

For anyone who hasn’t read the first part, here’s part 1

Enjoy !!! 

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It was frigid outside. You were running against the wind, tears streaming down your face. This just wasn’t your night at all. You really thought you could just let go of your feelings for Newt for one night and have some fun, but it seemed that luck wasn’t on your side tonight.

You continued running until you reached the front of the Goldstein’s apartment complex. You yanked open the doors and ran up the steps towards their apartment, your elbows stinging on the way. Once you were there, you rushed to the bathroom, searching for the first aid kit. You opened the cabinet and came face to face with a little box that read ‘First aid kit’. Pulling it out, you set it down and opened it, grabbing bandages and alcohol pads to clean your elbows. God, this was gonna hurt.

Unbeknownst to you, Newt was already on his way to the apartment. He noticed you leave last second and stopped skating with Tina to ask Queenie and Jacob why you had left so quickly. They both explained that you had fallen onto your elbows and that you were hurt. Once Newt heard this, he immediately took off his skates and put on his shoes so he could go and see if you were ok. He couldn’t bear to think of how badly you might be hurting now. 

Meanwhile, back in the bathroom, you had just washed your hands to get rid of the dry blood. You dried your hands and picked up one of the alcohol pad packets. This was going to sting… A lot. There is a way you could heal them with magic, but you couldn’t remember how to, so this was the only way to go. Opening the packet, you pulled out the pad and slowly applied it to your elbow. You gave a loud hiss when you felt a terrible stinging sensation. Tears started to spring in your eyes again. Had you really fallen that hard?

All of a sudden, the sound of a door banging open and footsteps could be heard in the room. You jumped and tried to close the bathroom door, but it was too late. Newt was already in front of the bathroom, pushing the door open and looking at the scene in front of him. 

He stood there for a second, staring at your disheveled state.“Merlin’s beard Y/n, have you been crying?” Newt looked at your puffy eyes. You lowered your head so he wouldn’t be able to see your face. His gaze then traveled to your scraped elbows.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were hurt?” He came closer to you to inspect the damage. You immediately shrunk back and tried to hide your arms away from him, hissing once again when you accidentally rubbed the alcohol pad against the torn skin.

“Wait here, I have something in my case that will help to heal you up.” He slowly took the alcohol pad away from you and packed up the first aid kit. Once he had the kit back in the cabinet, he ran out of the bathroom and into his case. 

Newt came back a little bit later with a jar that had a strange green paste in it. You sat on the toilet and looked down, still avoiding his gaze.

He lifted your chin and examined your face. Your lips were trembling and your eyes were still red and puffy from before. Newt set down the jar and took off his coat, wrapping it around you.

“Newt, no, you don’t have to-”

“No, I insist. You must have been freezing, running away so fast. Now, let’s take a look at your arms.” He took your hand and slowly stretched out your arm. You grit your teeth and clenched your fist. Realizing that you were hurting, he started to rub small circles with his thumb onto the back of your hand. 

Newt took the jar from the counter and opened it up, taking some of the paste onto his hand. He then continued to take your arm and rub the strange green paste onto your elbow. There was a little tingling sensation that soon went away, leaving a cool bliss in it’s wake.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were hurt?” Newt asked. You were really hoping he wouldn’t ask this question again, but now it seems like you’ll have to answer him.

“I didn’t want to ruin your fun. You seemed to be having a really good time with Tina.” You glanced up at Newt to see what his reaction would be.

His eyes were narrowed in confusion. “Y/n, you wouldn’t have ruined anything for me. You were hurt, and I should’ve been there to walk you back.” Newt took your other arm and stretched it out. He then started to rub some more of that green paste onto your elbow.

“Well, I would’ve messed up a special moment for you and Tina. I wouldn’t want to get in the way of what you guys have.” Newt stopped rubbing to look at you. You’re eyes were downcast again.

“What we have? Do you think… Do you think I fancy her?”

You didn’t respond to that. Instead, you hung your head even lower, your hair covering your face.

“I don’t… I only see Tina as a friend. Besides, how could I have feelings for her when I have the most beautiful girl right in front of me?”

Your head shot up when he said this. Newt was looking at you with such intensity you could almost melt on the spot.

“I… What? Are you talking about me?” You asked.

“There’s no one else in front of me, darling.” 

You smiled. You felt your heart explode with happiness and you couldn’t help but giggle from all of the emotions brewing inside of you now. Newt smiled back at you and gently kissed your forehead. 

“So, you really like me?”

“Yes, in fact, I’ve fancied you for a while now, but you haven’t noticed.” A slight blush crept up Newt’s cheeks. You couldn’t help but giggle once more. 

“Well, I’m sure I fancy you too Mr. Scamander.” You leaned forward and kissed his cheek. He smiled and pecked your nose.

Newt stood up and rinsed off his hands in the sink. He then looked back at you and extended his hand.

“Come, I have a present for you.”

You put your hand into Newt’s and he pulled you up from your seat. He led you out of the bathroom and into the guest room the both of you had been sleeping in.

He let go of your hand and walked over to his bed. Stooping down, he looked under the bed and grabbed something. He stood back up and walked over to you, hands behind his back.

Once he was in front of you, he took his hands from behind his back and showed you what he was hiding. In his hands was a small brown box with a silver bow loosely wrapped around it.

“I didn’t really know how to wrap the bow around the gift the proper way, so it looks a little lazy.”

You chuckled. “It’s ok, I like it.” Gently, you took the gift from Newt, surprised at how light it was. 

You untied the bow from the gift and opened the box. There, in the box, was a ticket for a boat trip to Spain.

“I know we finished writing the book together, but I want to travel with you more. And now that we know of each other’s feelings… Will you be mine Y/n?”

You laughed and wrapped your arms around Newt’s neck, bringing him in for a hug. He put his hands on the small of your back and hugged you back.

“I’d love to travel with you once again, Newt. And I’d also love to be all yours, If you agree to be mine.”

Newt broke away from the hug, his hands still on your shoulders. He then pulled you in for a sweet and gentle kiss. 

Pulling away, he looked at you and smiled. 

“Of course, darling.”

——————————————————————————————-

This is short but so sweet and honestly I could not be happier with the outcome of this story 

Please leave feedback and let me know what y’all think

Tags: @password123d , @joanne-egberp , @lilacyra , @officialfangirl03 , @starry-eyed-waltz , @georgiiamat , @kristenscamander , @justdeeanne @johnmurphys-sass , @poemfreak306 , @ganesh1234 , @chaoticgoodsouls @theholycakehole , @justbooktrashhere

talk shit, get hit

genre: delinquent!au

star of the show: NCT’s Jaehyun

word count: 3,021 words

author’s note: part of a Johnny/Jaehyun collab with @chipsandwaffles . Go read Johnny’s part here it doesn’t disappoint. 

And remember, Say No to Double J™ 

*explicit language, read at your own discretion*

Originally posted by wonwoosvt

opening line: “Rules are simply restrictions passed down from past generations to limit us from doing what they couldn’t do in their lifetimes.” 

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Who wears short shorts?

Hello, Love bugs!

Dan X Reader

warnings- Smut, Swears.

May you please do one where the reader likes wearing short shorts around the house and dan and Phil think they’re teasing them? Smut at the end maybe? Thnx x x - Anon


It was finally spring and you were going to take full advantage. You had pulled out the shorts that you had to hide away for two seasons. You and the boys were going to hang out to enjoy the spring by going to get a coffee and then sit indoors with the windows open while doing some work. 

Walking to the boy’s door you couldn't help the smirk on your face. It was a beautiful day and you were about to spend it with two cuties. You and Phil had been friends forever. After he introduced you to Dan it was like he was like you had found your long lost friend. You swore the two of you were best friends in a past life.You called Phil to tell him to bring his ass downstairs.

“Moshi Moshi!” You shook your head even if he couldn’t see it he had a feeling you were giving him the look through the phone.

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The Naked Truth

Written by: @peetaspikelets

Dialogue Prompt: this has got to be the strangest day of my life…(submitted by @xerxia31)

Rating: M (for nudity and language)

A/N: I need to thank Mr Pikelet for helping me bring this story to life. He brought ‘an event’ to my attention and after my initial shock and a bit of a giggle I thought I have to everlark this some how. 

A BIG thank you to my beta @sponsormusings for her amazing guidance, support and advice. I would be lost without you!

Enjoy!

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lost and found

summary: adrien and marinette get drunk together, adrien spills his guts, and marinette quickly realizes that the partner she lost two years ago after the defeat of hawkmoth is right in front of her. oh, boy. aged up AU.

genre: romance, humor, angst, crying children 

cross-posted: ao3

preview:

“Do you remember Ladybug and Chat Noir?”

Marinette felt her brow furrow in a knee-jerk reaction. She almost wanted to laugh. Did she remember Ladybug and Chat Noir? She had lived and breathed Ladybug and Chat Noir. They formed a core part of her soul. But it had been a long, long time since Paris had needed its heroes.

After the defeat of Hawkmoth, Chat Noir had disappeared. And after a few weeks of showing up on rooftop after empty rooftop waiting fruitlessly for her partner to come out from the shadows, Marinette had forced herself to retire Ladybug as well. After a tearful goodbye with Tikki, she’d handed the earrings back to Master Fu and assured him that if evil ever returned to Paris, she’d take them back in a heartbeat.

The depression that had ensued had been unfathomable in its depth. The eighteenth year of Marinette’s life was a black hole that she hardly remembered.

Subconsciously, Marinette raised a hand to one unadorned earlobe. It was only when she saw Adrien look at her curiously, cautiously, that she realized she hadn’t responded yet. “Uh—uh-huh,” she said, nodding.

“Well, what if…” Adrien’s eyes fell to his hands, which were folded in his lap, but he appeared to force himself to look back at her once more before continuing to speak. “Mari, what if I told you that I was Chat Noir?”

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