this show got it right with these two

I worked at a craft store the summer before college.  Here are my best (and the best of the worst) moments:

- A man bought 190 mason jars with lids.  I asked him if this was for a wedding, or if he was making jam.  He was doing neither.  He did not have plans for mason jars.  He just thought they were a really good sale.

- A woman bought her brother and his fiance a giant rainbow bow for their wedding present.  She whispered that they had been married before, but that the fiance had dressed as a woman and they wanted to make it real now that it was legal.  She shouted that rainbows are gay.  Her style is unusual.

- A little girl left finger-painted handprints on the inside of the back pockets of the pants I was wearing.  It was the most terrible case of “mistaken mother” I have ever experienced.

- A little girl came in looking for SWAPS for Girl Scout camp (pins you trade with other scouts at camp).  She asked me if I could help her even though I am too old to be a Girl Scout.  I showed her my lifetime membership card and the SWAPS on my keyring.  She told me I am her best friend, and came back two weeks later with a SWAP she had saved for me from camp.

- A woman came through with wedding supplies for her granddaughter and a very nervous outlook on the price.  I asked her what my name was, pretending to forget about my nametag, and when she got it right, pronounced her my good friend and gave her my friends-and-family discount.  She cried.  I might have too.

- A father bought his little boy a doll set.  The boy told me that the last set had been for his friend, but he had liked it much more than she did, so he was getting his own.  His baby sister was chewing on a monster truck.  I liked this family.

- I became known as the cashier who would give you the discounts under my register if you were nice.  The little old ladies who came in every yarn sale loved me.  My coupons and I were their heroes.

- The substitute teacher who had bullied me came through my line and smugly told me that her total was wrong.  I smiled politely and informed her that I had already given her the educator’s discount, but would happily take it off.  She was much less smug after that, as her daughter laughed her out of the store.

- A large woman with a 5 o'clock shadow came through my line.  I told her I liked her skirt.  She responded with the biggest smile I have ever seen.

- And finally, my favorite one:  a nine-year-old girl came up to my register with a stack of t-shirts and told me she had folded them for me, but could not reach where they belonged.  I told her most people would have left them on the floor.  She informed me that I was the cashier who helped her Girl Scout troop mate, and I quote:  "dang it, you do good things for good people!  I want to be a good people like you!“  and skipped out the door, before remembering her mother was still shopping and skipping right back in.

Sometimes, I love retail.

Bulletproof Monk

Witnessed in my friend’s campaign.

Friend of mine asked the GM if his friend could join our campaign. Graduated with a bachelors in fine arts and my friend thought he would bring interesting role-play to our games. So all of us start thinking to ourselves “this guys gonna be at Bard” but we were all surprised to find he actually was a Monk.

And not just a monk. The Bob Ross of monks. The nicest yet simultaneously the most terrifying character we’d ever witnessed. This is the story of how he beat the first serious boss of our campaign.

We were pinned behind cover vs a Gunslinger.

Gunslinger: “Come out. Come out. Wherever you are SO I CAN SHOOT YOU!”

Party talks about what to do and Monk is silent.

Then, as we are talking, he yells, “Ok. I’ll come out, but you better make that shot count!”

Monk OOC: “So there’s about 40 ft between me and him right?”

GM: “Yeah, and your speed would let you get there.”

Monk OOC: “Ok, but I deliberately want to walk slow enough so he gets a chance to shoot me.”

GM: “Uh, ok. Sure.”

Monk going towards him slowly: “Show me what you’ve got.”

Gunslinger: “You’re some kind of stupid, boy!” *Shoots*

GM: “That’s a hit. You take.”

Monk OOC: “I use Snatch Arrows.”

GM: “Wait…does that work on bullets?”

-One Rulebook Check later-

GM: “Ok so the rifle goes off and *Monk* reaches up faster than any of you can see and catches the bullet with two fingers. *Gunslinger* turns white as a sheet.”

Monk then proceeds to walk up and take a seat next to the guy, putting an arm around his shoulders while holding the bullet in his other hand.

Monk: “Hey, friend. Looks like you almost lost this. Good thing I grabbed it for you, huh? Why don’t you put the gun down before you lose any more?”

Monk OOC: “In case it’s not clear that’s an intimidate.”

GM: “Ok, roll for me.”

Nat 20

GM: “Of course it is. *Gunslinger* immediately puts his gun down in front of him and actually starts crying.”

Monk patting Gunslinger’s back: “Aw, there, there buddy. You almost got me. Why don’t you come with us now? Hands behind your back please. I’d hate to have to chase you.”

Our Wizard OOC to my friend: “So why did you never tell us your friend was Ace Ventura?”

psa for the yoi fandom: russian names & how to use them

Russian guides: masterpost | patronyms | terms of affection | answered asks

I’m going to start by swearing this isn’t me just complaining but a general resource for the Yuri on Ice fandom because I’ve noticed some mistakes in the naming conventions used among the fandom and want to help correct them. Especially in how the fandom treats diminutives. I absolutely love seeing the huge amount of interest in Russian diminutives, etc. in fanart and fics and hopefully this breakdown will help continue that trend and interest and even spur some more ideas in fandom content.

So let’s go through some important details below the cut!

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I AM SO HAPPY FOR HARRY OH MY GOSH LIKE HE SAID SHE WAS HIS IDOL AND HE ADORES HER AND LIKE HE SAID AT THE BEGINNING OF HIS SHOW THAT THIS WAS THE BEST NIGHT OF HIS LIFE AND THEN HE SAID IT AGAIN RIGHT BEFORE SHE CAME ON STAGE AND HE WAS LIKE “I NEVER THOUGHT I’D GET TO SAY THIS BUT WELCOME STEVE NICKS” AND THEN SHE SANG ONE OF HIS SONGS FROM HIS DEBUT ALBUM WITH HIM AND SAID IT WAS A GREAT SONG AND THEN HE GOT TO PERFORM NOT ONE BUT TWO (!!!!!!!!!!) OF HER SONGS WITH HIM AND SHE SAID SHE WAS ON STAGE WITH SOME GREAT MUSICIANS (INCLUDING HIM) AND THEN THEY HELD HANDS AND HUGGED AND HE STARTED CRYING HE WAS SO OVERWHELMED LIKE HE JUST PUT HIS HEAD IN HIS HANDS AND I’M JUST!!!!!! I’M SO HAPPY FOR HIM TO GET TO EXPERIENCE THIS WITH ONE OF HIS IDOLS LIKE!!!!!!!!! I’M JUST SO HAPPY FOR HIM THIS CLEARLY MEANS THE WORLD TO HIM

it gets easier to talk about but it also gets harder to talk about. i have to unfold things carefully, but the map shows better. here’s the first time i got hit by a parent, here’s the first time i got hit by a partner. they’re around the corner from each other, mirror images or hands holding or two sides of a blade. the look on people’s faces always is the same when they find out. like the words hurt them in the pit of their stomach. i feel bad when it does that; i know what it’s like to be suckerpunched. often i comfort people right after: oh, no, it’s okay, i’m okay now, it’s fine, i’m all in one piece, i got out, i’m a resilience child, i learned kindness, i found inner peace, i meditate twice a day, i do yoga and drink kale shakes and eat as if nobody ever made my teeth bleed. some of these are lies, but that is fine too, because it’s better that people don’t know an ugly truth.

sometimes i forget who in the room knows. i laugh about what happened like a punchline (get it) and people stare at me with mouths open like moons. oh my god, did that really happen to you? i don’t know. sometimes it feels like it happened to someone else, out on a distant planet. sometimes it feels like it never happened at all. sometimes it feels like it’s still happening. how can you laugh at that? and is that true? how do i say “because if i don’t laugh it’s serious” because of course it’s true. for proof: raise your hand a fraction too smooth. watch the shadow pass over my face. watch me curl away. watch me change. like a chameleon girl, i shift my shape. someone who doesn’t know laughs. you’re certainly jumpy. the girl at the table who helped me cover the bruise stares at me, watching my chest, trying to figure out if i’m panicking. he’s confused when quiet are you okay questions touch my skin - only those who know, only those who are watching.

and i smile, because it’s easier to talk about but it’s harder to admit it still effects me. memories should be left in the kingdom of dreams. sometimes i feel like i should be done with it already. i stare at a picture of cartoons that says if you don’t know these, you didn’t have a childhood. i know all but two of them. some of them i watched after it happened. i really liked scooby doo. in the end, the mask comes off and the bad guy is revealed and he goes to jail. in real life, i wait for someone to come take his mask off. it just makes him mean. the blue lights of the law never show up on the green of our lawn. i had a pretty good childhood, i think. it made me interesting, at least. i picked blueberries.

i laugh about it a lot. talk about how it’s funny that if you got abused there’s just, like, a second round of partner abuse, sitting out there, waiting for you. that you’re the most likely to pick an abuser from the crowd - or worse, like beauty and the beast, watch yourself become her. see your rotten hands and think of your father. isn’t that funny! that i can take a hit and i’d rather take a lifetime of them than be the one doing the giving just once. i talk about how you walk in the eclipse of it. that it confuses you when the sun comes out. that when you find someone who won’t hurt you, you still walk on eggshells, waiting for them to hurt you. i say it through a smile, because if you bend yourself the right way, your life looks more like comedy-drama than just plain tragedy. i watch fantastic beasts and where to find them and when the abused child turns out to be beyond saving, i hear myself laugh in a bark. or it was a sob. i can’t tell. it doesn’t matter. in my world, children like me learned about magic early, and how our own actions can turn a man from a gentle person into a savage beast. 

okay, i say, smiling, maybe if you put it that way, yeah, i was abused and it wasn’t funny. but come on. think of the puns! you could say my life was really a hit! now don’t be upset. it’s funny. it’s funny. it’s funny.

givenchy & gold, part i (m.)

;pairing — jungkook/reader

;warnings — sex | implied exhibitionism | mild dom/sub tones | if u’ve got a praise kink then ur gonna love this | mentions of daddy kinks | instances of spanking 

;summary — you’re the supervisor of the clothing department with a lot of useless lingerie knowledge, jungkook is the jewelry department’s defiant hot boy who flirts in wristwatch brands. basically an upscale retail au, but with lots of implied under-the-counter sex. and when an opportunity presents itself to fuck each other in the boss’s office after hours, you’re both too hot for each other to say no.

;word count — 20k im so sorry

part i | part ii

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Harry Styles Vocal Health on SNL

Hello!  So first and foremost I wan to put out there how much I love Harry and his voice.  Dear god it’s SO COOL and unique.  I love how when he’s in good vocal health he has all these different textures to it- the gruffness of his chest voice, the purity of his falsetto, the power of his belt.  When the studio version of SOTT came out I couldn’t sing his praises enough.  His voice sounded SO HEALTHY.  He was making such good choices!!!  Everything was relaxed and well supported.  He let the song build naturally.  He MUST have gotten some solid vocal training over his break because that isn’t something that can just happen over night.  I was very impressed and very proud.  I was also a bit nervous to see if these changes would hold when he started performing live….and…..it looks like I had good reason to be nervous.  

Here’s the thing. There are a few reasons I’m so hard on Harry in particular when it comes to poor technique. First, compared to the other guys, his technique is the only one that’s actually physically DAMAGING.  Could the other guys benefit from proper training?  Sure.  Of course.  Every singer can.  Even those who have been singing for years still should train on a regular basis.  But the other boys’ bad habits are just that- bad habits.  They aren’t going to do long term damage, not the way Harry’s are.    The second reason is BECAUSE I know he can do (AND HAS DONE!!!!!) so much better!!   I know he’s CAPABLE of so much more and so yeah, I’m hard on him because of that. And finally, I know exactly what he’s doing physically and exactly what’s going through his mind because I have the same exact bad habits and I can see him using the same exact thought process as to why he slips into these again.

Harry is the Ultimate Performer. He wants nothing more than to put on a good show for everyone, even if that means sacrificing his own vocal health.  Now, that’s isn’t a HUGE problem…until it KEEPS happening.  Which is what happened with OTRA.  And possibly might be happening now, although that remains to be seen.  One performance of one song slips into an entire show of this slips into two shows of this slips into the entire tour and wham, you’ve got nodes.  I think the biggest problem with Harry’s performance last night is he doesn’t trust the material or HIMSELF to sell it the way it is.  He feels he needs to overcompensate and big Big and Bold right from the start and that song is not built to be sung that way.  He started at a level that he couldn’t sustain throughout the entire thing and had nowhere to go.  That’s when he ran into trouble.  

As soon as he opened his mouth, I knew it wasn’t going to go well.  Don’t get me wrong, he sounds fantastic in the beginning…but like I said, there was nothing for him to build upon because he already started it at too high a height. His voice sounded raspy to me too, raspier than usual.  That can be caused by a few things- he could have been dehydrated (you can’t sing right if you don’t pee white!), he could have been tired (we know he’s a morning person and that show is pretty late for him), he could have strained his voice at the concert the night before, he could have over rehearsed, he could have smoked a bit.  I don’t know what the cause was, but he didn’t start off the evening in the best vocal health, especially for a song that’s very difficult to sing.  I also think he KNEW that so again, he tried to overcompensate for that by pushing.  

There is so much tension throughout his whole body, particular his shoulders on up.  I’m sure a lot of that is due to nerves.  I’ve said it many times before and I’ll say it again: the SNL stage is one of the hardest venues for artists to play.  There’s something particularly rough about it.  He’s also always had problems tensing up his face when he sings, but it what was particularly striking to me was that he did it during the falsetto parts.  That should have been EASY for him to sing.  That’s something light and relaxed.  Almost a break from the tension of the rest of the song…and yet he looks like he was in pain.  Which makes me wonder if he WAS in pain.  it’s hard to tell, but it almost seems like the second time he does it he pushes it more to a mix than a pure falsetto. 

It’s notable to me how relaxed the second syllable of  “bullets” around 2:44-2:48 is compared to the rest.  THAT is what the whole thing should have sounded like.  it’s relaxed and he’s got a great vibratto on it that comes straight from the diaphragm there- compare that to how tight “bullets” are the second time he sings it in that phrase at 2:58ish-3:04.  Why did you change what you were doing, sir??? In fact, to me it seemed like he KNEW it sounded good the first time and did his cute li’l dance and then came back to it feeling like “yeah I got this…” and then tightened right back up again.  because he didn’t trust himself.  

Thennnnnn the bridge happens.  And this is what i mean by he had nowhere to go.  THIS should have been his first belt it out moment.  but he pushed too hard too quickly and his voice just…wasn’t there.  It was tired.  The first scoop up to the first “we” was off key because of it and I think he knew it which made it even worse and MORE tense to the point where he just didn’t have the vocal agility to flip into his fasletto again for “learn”.  And then we’ve got the “it’s just what we know” which was just a poor choice.  I have a feeling he nailed that MULTIPLE times in rehearsals and mannnnn if he was in good vocal health how killer would that have sounded!??!!?  But instead, we got what’s called harmonic distortion which is SUPER VERY YIKESY AND A BIG SIGN OF HOLYSHITYOU’REDOINGDAMAGE (i sincerely hope he has an appointment with an ENT this week and gets scoped to check that out).   This was another instance of him trying to put on a great show and overcompensate for what he probably felt was lackluster vocals (which for the record WERE NOT THAT BAD.  I’m picking it apart because…well, it’s what I do.  and i don’t think I would have had too much of a problem if it weren’t for the super damaging choices he ended up making).  

From there he’s thinking “Oh shit that was bad…I REALLY fucked up…better step up my game and make the end better!” and once again tries to overcompensate and push a voice that’s already been pushed to the brink.  there just wasn’t more in there for it to give.  He couldn’t sustain it.  He had already given everything that there was go to give.  

When it comes to ESNY, it was a much better performance.  I think it’s partially due to the fact that it’s an easier song to sing and partially due to the fact that he was playing guitar so he wasn’t as much in his head (Side note: CAN YOU BELIEVE HE FINALLY BLESSED US WITH HIS GUITAR SKILLS?????).  His belty part towards the end wasn’t as good as it could have been, but I think that’s just due to the fact that his voice was kinda shot and that’s the best it was going to be.  It wasn’t TERRIBLE and obviously it could have been better, but I am curious to hear the studio version to see if there’s more belting that he just wasn’t comfortable with last night.  I could have done without the facial affectations because it just adds more tension and tension is bad, kiddos  But I think it’s a stylistic choice and I’m trying to pick my battles here.  Additionally, as we’ve seen in gif form his li’l neck vein was popping out so yeah he was tensing up pretty good there…but again, it wasn’t as terrible as it could have been since the song itself isn’t as taxing vocally.  

All in all, the performances were great, especially if you’re not as picky as I am. I know this was his first time singing live in well over a year and SNL is high stress and it’s his first time out there ALONE.  I’m curious to see what happens on Graham Norton and if he improves his technique. I’m also really curious to see how he’ll be on tour as well. I do wonder if he’ll lower the key of SOTT so it’s not as taxing.  No one would really notice and it would make things a little easier on him. It’s just frustrating because I know he has it in him to do it well.  We’ve HEARD him do it well.  But he just doesn’t trust himself enough to do that and that kind of breaks my heart a little.  Thankfully, he’s young and has time to learn.  He can still break these habits and make new, healthier ones and learn to trust himself more.

BUDDY.  YOU GOT THIS.  YOU HAVE AN AMAZING VOICE.  YOU ARE A FANTASTIC SONGWRITER.  YOU HAVE GREAT TECHNIQUE WHEN YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO IT.  YOU ARE A KILLER SHOWMAN WITH A TON OF CHARISMA.  PLEASE TRUST THESE THINGS AND STOP PUSHING YOURSELF BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO SEE YOU DAMAGE ANYTHING.  

Love,

B <3 

His Control (M)

Genre: Smut

Word Count: 3,942

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Description: After showing off to his friends what he could do more push-ups than them, you felt like he was going overboard with his competitive side. Ignoring him for a couple weeks, made a new side of him come out.

Warning: Dom!Kook, Thigh Riding, Teasing, Dirty Talk, Daddy Kink and Orgasm Denial

A/N: I made a bet in a group chat that I wouldn’t say anything sexual about Jungkook for a month. I won but during that month, I would type out how a felt about this “unnamed guy” aka Jungkook. So, after the month was up, I decided to change all the ‘He’s to Jungkook. The beginning is kind of based on Episode 12 of Run BTS. I can’t believe I wrote all of this filth. Well, looks like I’m going to hell after this. Also, I didn’t edit it. So, if there’s any mistakes. I’m sorry


Whenever he walked over to you, there would be a huge smile on his face. It would have seemed as if he won the lottery or if he found out something interesting that he was ready to tell you about. Jungkook’s smile made you feel like you were stuck in a trance and everything around you was moving slowly. Whenever you looked into his considerably large eyes, it would feel as if it was only you and him in the world. He had that effect on you and you never knew it. He had his days where he would annoy you to the point where you would ignore him for days on end. Especially on this particular day, he was showing off way too much and you were not having it.

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"seems accurate” || newt scamander

word count: 2809

summary: soulmate au!(reader x newt scamander) → you have a tattoo of what your soulmate is most passionate about

author’s note: this can go one of two ways → one: really horribly and no one likes it OR two: people like it and i fell happy on the inside. i don’t know which one to expect. but, anyways, enjoy! (sorry for any spelling or grammar errors)

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Vow

*swamped with homework and feelings and managed to shell this out a month late…I’m a mess™*

Request:  Hii can i have a drabble thingy game with jimin?TY😙😉 12,23 by  rebelliousjvmin

Word Count: 8.6k

Originally posted by bwipsul

He’s a literal angel


You were immersed in a deep sleep, tired from working on a large project that was worth half your grade. In you attempt to disconnect from the world around and sleep peacefully, you blocked out the sounds and all touch with reality. The sudden dip in your bed didn’t bother you, the presence of another body and an arm haphazardly wrapping around you, these were things you were blocking out. Until you felt a finger on your cheek.

“Hey, roomie.”

“I hate you.”

“You know you love me.”

“Kiss my ass, Jimin.” You used to think you were lucky to be paired up with your best friend in the dorms of your university. Until you realized he was a clingy, sassy and messy guy that never failed to annoy you. His leisure attitude towards school was opposite to your dedication to reading every word of your textbook. He was a jock, baseball being the reason he was here in your room and cheekily smiling at you.  

“I wouldn’t mind doing that.” You whacked him in the face with your pillow, wanting him to leave your room but he instead pulled you closer against his chest.

“Let go of me, you pervert.”

“You told me to kiss your ass, now…”

“I swear to god, Jimin, I’ll suffocate you in your sleep.”

“Kinky. I always wanted to test out breath play.”

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anonymous asked:

Top ten yuuri/viktor birthday presents?

Top Ten Yuuri/Viktor Birthday Presents

10) After Phichit moved back to Thailand, Yuuri got pretty sad because it was much harder to see each other now that they weren’t living together and so for his birthday Viktor took him on a surprise visit to Thailand that he and Phichit had co-conspired to plan

9) Since Viktor was really, really good at learning languages but never got an official degree in any of them because he was too busy skating, Yuuri paid for him to do an online college course in languages so that he had the qualifications to prove it

8) Viktor once got Yuuri a matryoshka doll after Yuuri said he thought that they were cute except it was a custom made one of Yuuri in all his different costumes from his newest one on the outside to a tiny little 14 year old Yuuri right in the middle in his very first Junior costume

7) Usually Viktor had to spend his birthday at an official party with lots of reporters and things, putting on a show for the cameras but instead Yuuri co-conspired with Yakov to make sure Viktor had the entire day to himself and spent it taking care of him with just the two of them so that Viktor could finally have a private birthday day with no pressure or expectations and being very spoiled by Yuuri

6) Viktor learned how to cook Katsudon in secret through a lot of phone calls and skype sessions with Yuuri’s mum so that he could make it specially for Yuuri’s birthday

5) They both mutually gave each other a new puppy to keep Makkachin and Vicchan company and so that they would still have a dog when their two eventually passed away

4) Yuuri made Viktor a special photo album for his 30th because Viktor was getting pretty down about how old he was and Yuuri spent weeks collecting every photo he could find of Viktor both in competitions and with his friends etc to organise into one big book to remind him that even though he was thirty years old it was thirty years well spent

3) Viktor got Yuuri a new dog collar for Vicchan with the name in Russian and Japanese which was a really nice present except that for the fact that with Vicchan’s name they just directly translated as Виктор in Russian. Yurio found it before Viktor gave it to Yuuri when it wasn’t on Vicchan yet and was just like ‘Viktor what the hell, why do you have a collar with your name on it??? Wait a minute no, I don’t want to know, I DON’T WANT TO KNOW’

2) Viktor spent ages sourcing out an original copy of the infamous poster that Yuuri had of him for all those years and signed it and gave it to Yuuri as a do over. Because he still regretted how much of a bad first impression he made and even though he couldn’t take it back he could do it again the way that he should have done the first time, praising Yuuri and telling him just how amazing he is

1) Yuuri made Viktor a scrapbook of their entire lives together. It included everything, old newspaper clippings about the two of them, screenshots from old videos of them on the podium together when they were younger, official competition photos, everything detailing right from the beginning of their rivalry all the way up until the present day with the last photo in the book being the photo of them kissing at the alter

8

You got more talent than me. I got two. One is I can sleep anywhere, any time. The other one is that I usually end up getting what I want on average, over time. It’s all about getting people to believe in you. It’s not their cash, it’s their faith. Well, take this plane, for example. This 80-ton chub of metal, seat cushions, and Bloody Mary mix has no right to be soaring through the sky, but along comes Newton explaining something about the air flow over the wing creating an uplift or some such shit, none of which makes a lick of sense, but you got 82 passengers back there who believe it so fiercely, the plane continues its journey safely. Now, what’s keeping us aloft? Faith or Newton?

under the cut you will find 46 connection ideas. a good portion of these are “piggy backs” on usual connections that go a little deeper (give me some depth to that neighbors connection – what kind of neighbors are they!?) for those of you that want plots that are more than the bare minimum like myself but aren’t quite sure where to start!

       there is one connection with a mention of alcohol, but i tried to keep the triggers at a minimum. the one with the trigger is labeled at the beginning of the connection so you can easily avoid it if necessary. if i’ve failed to mark a trigger, please let me know and i will update this immediately!

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Star Wars and toxic masculinity though, I’m sorry, but what? Are we watching the same movies? They have a pretty clear message: Anger is the path to the Dark Side. If you want to be a hero, don’t go around getting angry and being violent, you have to be nice. Kind. Understanding. That’s kind of a central message. And it runs very much counter to the whole angry, prone to violence, emotionless macho thing.

That’s shown in the characters as well, because we’ve got some really big tough no-emotion macho hero types there, let’s review:

  • Luke Skywalker, bleeding heart idealist, has a lot of feelings and shows all of them. Whines about wanting to see his friends. Cries when upset or in pain. Appeals to people’s conscience, does the right thing, big on calming your mind and listening to your heart. Makes friends with everyone immediately, can’t hate anyone for longer than two minutes. Does not hesitate to rush headlong into danger, but can’t necessarily save the day with fighting prowess. Cares deeply about everyone. If you could be friends with any character, I’d recommend this one.
  • Han Solo, resident idiot, has many feelings and tries to hide them, everyone knows anyway. Will glance broodily around so that you can tell he’s upset or conflicted. Really wants to talk to the girl he likes about her feelings, but has no idea how. Says he doesn’t care, continually runs straight into danger to save the people he cares about. Doesn’t even try to look tough in the face of torture, immediately starts screaming, would never say “it’s just a scratch”. Constantly needs help, always barely one step ahead of total disaster, definitely not your knight in shining armour.
  • Lando Calrissian, actual ladies’ man, charming and suave, arguably the closest we get to a fuckboy except not because he totally respects Leia. Shows polite interest, does not push or manipulate when he realises that she’s not interested, despite the fact that this happens very subtly. Does not hesitate to do the right thing, loyal to his friends, even at great personal cost. Also does not hesitate to follow Leia’s orders, and not because he thinks it’ll get him laid.
  • Anakin Skywalker, drama queen extraordinaire, has far too many feelings and most of them make him cry. May seem a little whiny. Always wants to talk about his feelings, readily shares them with anyone who’ll stand still for long enough. Loves very deeply and is not afraid to show it. Gets very angry, but this is shown to be a Bad Thing. Gets too attached to the point of obsession, which is also shown to be a Bad Thing.
  • Obi-Wan Kenobi, drama queen support group, is a lot better at keeping his feelings under control but still has them. Will absolutely cry at emotional moments (possibly because he is tired). Understands everyone, even if he kind of wishes he didn’t. His need to be rescued by Anakin is a running joke, but not in a way that demeans him as a man, or a person. Makes snarky quips to reassure himself. Knew all along that This Is A Terrible Idea. Definitely the Mom Friend.
  • Palpatine, the big bad, an evil nightmare of a man. Literally uses his anger and hatred as a power source. Enjoys torture and violence, wants to corrupt the hero with hatred and anger. Likes to pretend he knows everything, needs no help, thinks love and friendship are weakness. Has no friends. Employs no women (in the movies). Shows no emotion except smug superiority, anger, and, briefly, panic. Ultimately defeated by the power of love and forgiveness, which serves him right.

Star Wars very explicitly portrays excessive anger and violence as BAD, and caring and understanding as GOOD. The guys are allowed to cry, they all need rescuing at various points and they aren’t “less” for it. They work together with women, as partners and equals. When Anakin finds out that Padmé is pregnant, he doesn’t roll his eyes or get cold feet, he’s delighted. He’s excited to be a father and start a family. The only disparaging comment I can think of that any guy makes about women in the movies is Han’s “If we can avoid any more female advice” which is followed by Leia telling him to shut up and do what he’s told, and Han grumbling and doing what he’s told. So that plays more like Han trying desperately to find some way of getting back at Leia because he does not like being told what to do, and immediately losing another round.

We see Han trying to get Leia to admit how she feels about him, while Leia is more concerned about getting him to join the cause. We see Padmé trying to be practical and focus on the mission while Anakin can’t shut up about his feelings. We see Luke saving the day not by being the ultimate badass macho fighter man, but by appealing to his father’s conscience, his love, the good in Anakin Skywalker. We see plenty of instances of men asking for help and accepting help, showing emotion without being judged or fear of being judged, wanting love and family, etc. We also see romantic rivalry between Han and Luke, and Han and Lando, that does not turn into any kind of “fight” for Leia’s affections, because it’s Leia’s choice and they all know and respect that. In fact, the three guys are friends and stay that way.

All of that is the opposite of toxic masculinity, as far as I can tell.

If anything, the prequel trilogy is a cautionary tale about the importance of keeping your emotions, especially your anger, in check, and the original trilogy is basically how to do it right. Darth Vader is not portrayed as some kind of masculine ideal to strive for, he’s the bad guy. Luke, with his emotional openness and explicit refusal to give in to anger and hatred and violence, is the good guy. Luke is a character you can show to a little kid and say “this is a hero”.

I guess if you twist it enough you can see sexism and toxic masculinity in everything, and I’m not saying these movies are perfect. They have plenty of problems. But when it comes to portrayals of male heroism (and villainy), I think they’re actually pretty damn good.

After multiple attempts at recording this I finally got it. There are two things here that I wanted to bring attention to. 1. Right at the start of the chase you can hear Bendy saying what /kind of/ sounds like ‘stop’ I mentioned this in an earlier post but I also wanted to record it to show you. 2. Once you get behind the door you’ll hear Bendy pound on it a few times and then you hear his heavy breathing followed by inky sounds as he leaves. I find it quite odd that an animated ink demon has to breathe. I also think it’s weird that rather than hearing foot steps as he leaves we hear those squishy sounds instead.

How’s Your Throat? (M)

Pairing: Simon Dominic x Reader
Warnings: ???
A/N: I started this months ago for a request but then things went left and I couldn’t write for a good month or so.  Mianhae to whoever requested this story.  I tried, yet failed.


Have you ever been backstage at an AOMG concert?  No?  Well, it is just as crazy as you can imagine.  Someone will end up chasing someone or they’ll be arguing over something stupid and/or irrelevant.  And please whatever you do, do NOT mention the NFL or the Seahawks.  Unless you want to hear Jay go on and on about the strength behind the 12th man.  

Keep reading

My Fake Boyfriend Part 11 (Final Part)

Summary: After receiving a very rude letter of your ex on the mail saying that he is going to get married. You see yourself not knowing what to do, you can just let it go or accept the help of your hot neighbor and pretend he is your boyfriend.

Paring: Bucky x Reader

Words: 3571

Warnings: A lot of emotions, a lot of fluffy and a little of smut.

@drinkfantasy thank you so much for being my beta. You are the best.

You are so happy, you can’t believe that today you are finally going to sleep on your own bed. “You know, I really like to see you wearing my clothes.” You smile at Bucky’s words as he hugs you from behind.

“I like to wear them, they smell like you.” You are wearing a pair of leggings and one of his sweaters. It’s so big and comfortable. “You can keep it if you want, it looks really good on you.” You turn around kissing him on the lips. “You are going to regret this, in a couple months you are not going to have any more clothes to wear.” You say playful, taking his hair out of his forehead.

“I don’t mind, I can always steal them back and this way they are gonna smell like you.” He is so sweet, you can’t believe how kind and precious Bucky Barnes can be, especially after everything he has been through.

Keep reading

Always Love You

Peter Parker x reader

Plot- gonna skip this today cause i feel like it would ruing the story if you knew what was going on so, it s a surprise

Warnings- language like usual, angst

A/n ok so im like super proud of this cause I’ve had this idea for a really long time and i like how it turned out. Let me know what you think!!!

~~


You sighed, leaning forward on the counter and tapping your fingers against the wood, leisurely scrolling through tumblr to pass the time at your job. You were bored out of your mind. Every Friday, you worked the night shift at the small little coffee shop you worked at. It was easy, hardly anyone came in at night, and you were allowed to drink a few coffee’s to keep your eyes open, so it wasn’t anything too bad. Plus, there was the extra cash, so.

But, above all, there was one major plus in working the night shift, and that was your friendly neighborhood Spiderman. He came by to buy a coffee once, you ended up talking for hours, and it just kinda became a thing between you two. Eventually he would bring some snacks, as you often got hungry in the night, and you would sit together and drink coffee and eat snacks with him. Well, you ate, he refused to lift his mask that high, and you respected him as to not lose his trust. Of course you wondered who he was, when you first became friends it killed you (not to mention something about his voice was so familiar), but you accepted his secret and let it be.

To be honest, you really enjoyed his company and looked forward to these Friday nights. You didn’t know how many times you had refused to skip a week of the night shift in order to go out on a Friday with your friends. They all eventually learned to plan their nights out on Saturday. You didn’t want to ditch Spiderman, or have him worry. He had freaked out once when you were sick, thinking something had happened to you, and you thought it was really sweet. You worried about him too, a lot considering what he did. He rushed off all the time in the middle of your conversations, and most of the time you wouldn’t see him until next week. Of course you would see on the news that he was fine and had taken down the threat, and that would put you at ease until the next time it happened.

It was dumb, and you knew it was, but you couldn’t help but have a little bit of a crush on him. He was sweet and kind to you, and you loved being around him. You knew you had no chance, you didn’t even know his name for god’s sake, but it was a nice thought. Not, that you thought about it often. You definitely didn’t daydream about him romantically taking off his mask and taking you into his arms before kissing you and-…no, you definitely didn’t think about that.


A few months ago, the light almost silent sound of someone landing outside your stand would have scared the shit out of you, especially at this time of night. But you were more than used to it now, and smiled as you turned around and saw the mask of your favorite superhero.

“Hey Spidey,” you leaned on the edge of the counter to greet him before turning to make his usual espresso, “Slow night?”

“Ya, but hey I’m not complaining. In this business, you don’t want a busy night.” he said with a dorky giggle at the end.

You had to stop yourself from swooning. God, he was just so cute!

“Can’t argue with that.” you handed him the coffee, and as usual, he tried to hand over the money but you pushed it back, “How many times do I have to tell you, Superheroes drink free.” You winked.

Although you couldn’t see his face, you had a feeling he was smiling, you could tell from his voice.

“Thanks (Y/n). So how’s your week been?” he asked.

You went into the usual retelling of your week, as he listened intently, lifting his mask just enough to get the straw under and to his mouth. He then followed with his own stories from the week, which you often argued was the more interesting part of your conversation but he insisted he liked yours better.

“But by far the worst part was when this dude tried to tase me.” he chuckled, and you too couldn’t contain your own giggles. Just imagining him swinging around trying to avoid getting tased.

“Hey, it’s not funny. See, this is the kind of thanks I get for trying to protect you citizens. I was promised the pretty girls would be swooning over me, but instead all I get is laughed at.”

You only laughed harder, until his words processed in your minds, “Wait, you think I’m pretty…?” you trailed off, your amused smile turning to a hopeful one, and you prayed he didn’t pick up on it.

His whole body seemed to go rigid for a split second as he himself realized what he had said, “Uh, I um- I mean uh-” he floundered for a moment, reaching up and running the back of his neck while looking anywhere but at you as he tried to gather his thoughts. Then he froze, looking off into the distance.

You knew that look. His spidey-senses were tingling.

And the moment was gone.

“It’s ok, go save the city.” You smiled, playfully nudging his shoulder.

He looked at you, and you wished you could see the emotions on his face, but all you got was a rushed, “Bye (Y/n). See you next week.”

And it was over. Just like that, the best part of your week had gone by, and you would have to wait a whole seven days before you got it again.

During rest of your shift, and the moments up to when you fell asleep that night, all you thought about was him. Or, more specifically, what would have happened between you and him if he hadn’t had to go at that moment. That night you dreamt of him, or at least someone like him.


Slamming your locker shut, you dropped your head onto the cool metal, “I definitely bombed that test.”

“Same.” your friend mumbled, her eyes fixated on her phone.

“Seriously am I crazy or was that nothing like the study guide?”

“Both.” she winked as you began to walk towards your car.

You laughed, climbing into the driver’s seat as she got into the passengers.

Looking through the rearview mirror, you froze as you saw an oh so familiar car pulling up.

It was Tony Starks. Or, rather, his drivers, coming by like he did every Monday to pick up Peter.

You felt the air drain out of you as you saw Peter run out of the school and into the car, the tinted windows preventing you from seeing anything else.

You gripped the steering wheel and tore your eyes away, looking down. It was ridiculous really. It’s been so long. Why did it still hurt so bad just seeing him?

“Hey,” you felt a comforting hand on your arm, “Does it still hurt that much?” she asked.

She was right to be surprised, it had been almost two months since you broke up with Peter, and as bad as you wanted to, you just couldn’t move on. It was like something was keeping you hung up on him.

He was the first significant other you had really loved, but you never even got the chance to say it. After just over a year of being together, he began to grow distant. He would disappear, miss dates, ignore texts and calls. And the weirdest part was when he would show up with random bruises and cuts. No matter how much you begged, he wouldn’t explain. According to Aunt May, he was sneaking out at night and not coming home till the morning. Not to mention his sudden friendship with Tony Stark, which he claimed was an internship, but he never went into too much detail about it.

It was all just too much. The lies and excuses drove you insane, and you eventually forced yourself to end it. He had just stared at you with huge eyes when you did it, and you knew if he had simply asked you to stay, you would have. But he didn’t ask. And you didn’t stay.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” you mumbled, putting the car into drive and pulling out of the parking lot.


Standing by the window of your coffee stand, you impatiently tapped a beat into the counter. Your coworker was 30 minutes late with no explanation as to why, which meant you were stuck here until her or your boss showed up, whichever happened first. It was almost 9, and you had a crap load of homework to do, but you were stuck in the goddamn stand.

You folded your arms before resting your head on them. A few minutes passed before you heard the sound of a car pulling up.

When you looked up, and saw a van about twenty feet from the stand.

The side door slid open.

“What the hell…?” you mumbled,  standing up straight.

As soon as the words left your mouth, a man jumped out and began firing at the stand with a machine gun.

You shrieked, and dropped to the ground, covering your head.

The firing didn’t stop, and you began to crawl towards the back door, but as you reached the door knob, it was pulled open. A man stood outside, and grabbed you, pulling you to your feet and dragging you along with him.

He pushed you forward to the center of the group that had exited the van. They didn’t seem like anyone special, just a group of very scary looking people.

You tripped and just barely kept your balance, looking around at the circle that had formed around you.

“Well, what are you waiting for? Call him!” a girl spat at you.

“W-what?” you stammered, “I don’t know what your talking about please-”

“Don’t play dumb with us. You dont think no one’s noticed the Spiderman coming here every week? He obviously knows you and unless you call him here the next time he sees ya is gonna be in a body bag!”

You flinched back, tears filling your eyes, “I don’t, I don’t know who he is he just stops by to talk i really don’t-” you screamed as one of the fired into the air.

“Just kill the crying bitch. Leave her as a warning- mmh!” His mouth was suddenly covered in webs before he was kicked in the face.

“Is that really how you talk to a lady?” a familiar voice asked, standing over the guy as he webbed him up.

There was yelling and a lot of  gunshots, then for some reason you were laying on the ground.

You could hardly keep up with the red and blue blur that was Spiderman. Watching him fight was mesmerising, nothing like listening to his retellings of it. He always down played his feats.

Then all at once there was a pain in your stomach, and you couldn’t contain your scream of pain. It was like nothing you had felt before.

“(Y/n)? (Y/n)! Open your eyes!”

When had you closed your eyes? Nevertheless, you opened them and saw the masked face you had grown to close too. He had pulled you into his lap and was gently moving your hair out of your face.

“What…what happened?” you breathed.

“You were shot oh god (Y/n) I’m so sorry this is all my fault I should’ve come faster or better yet just never let them get to you in the first place just just stay awake ok Mr Stark is bringing help he’ll fix you oh god-” you couldn’t quite hear the rest of his rambles, but instead focused on the increasing feeling of familiarity. His voice,  it made you feel comfortable, and safe, and reminded you of better times. You felt happy, closing your eyes, listening to the sound of his voice, and leaning into his touch. It was soft and loving. And for some reason, Peter was all you could think about. Peter. Why him, why now? Why was he the one?

You could hear him calling your name.

Peter.

Or, was it Spiderman.

You couldn’t bring yourself to open your eyes to check.

And as you slipped into unconsciousness, there was only one thing on your mind.

Peter.

~

He felt sick.

He felt tired.

He felt like he had died.

But he wasn’t the one who had gotten hurt.

He sat in the hospital room, everything a sterile, too bright white. The only thing keeping him together was the sound of the heart monitor. Your heart monitor.

He didn’t want to look at you, he had already seen your skin, which was strikingly pale. He had already seen your face, with dry lips and a tube to help you breath. He had already seen your bandged up stomach, where the bullet wou d had been.

He just wanted to see your eyes. For you to be awake.

But until then, he didn’t want to see you because then it became too real.

He did this too you, and it was killing him.

The door opened,  and peter didn’t have to look up to know who it was.

Mr Stark placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, “Here kid, you gotta eat something.” he place a box on the table next to them.

Peter stayed silent, so he spoke again, “All those times you went on and on about (Y/n) I figured the first time I would be meeting her would be at the engagement party.” he said, trying to lift the mood.

“She wasn’t even my girlfriend.” Peter simply said, keeping his gaze on the floor.

“What? I thought you said-”

“She broke up with me. Because I was keeping secrets. I didn’t tell her cause I thought she would be in danger if I did. And I took her for granted and she broke up with me.” he paused for a moment and Tony heard his sniffling, “But I love her and I couldn’t stay away so I was being selfish and talking to her as Spiderman. And I fell in love with her all over again. And I was an idiot and I almost killed her.”

The room was silent, the steady beating of your heart the only thing making noise.

“You’re right, you were an idiot. You can’t protect people by keeping them in the dark. But this isn’t your fault, kid. You did everything you could, and she isn’t dead, just injured. So my advice is to tell her the truth and pray she’ll take you back when she wakes up. This life isn’t worth losing someone you love over. Trust me.” Tony stood, sympathetically patting his shoulder again, before leaving the room.

For the second time since he had gotten to the hospital, he brought his tear filled eyes up to look at you.

He had missed you more than words could describe. When you broke up with him, he felt his heart breaking, and he hadn’t been able to make himself saying anything. He regretted that everyday. If he had just asked, would he have been able to make you stay?

He took your limp hand in his.

He wanted nothing more but to hold you again, kiss you again.

Finally tell you he loved you.

But for now, this was as close as he could get.

He would just have to wait and hope.


~~


What do you think?? Is it good? Let me know, i love you all!!

anonymous asked:

i'm so nervous about this getting renewed since the get down got cancelled and it had a high budget ;-; and we got #renewsense8 trending #1 worldwide.

I am gonna say to you guys over here exactly what I said a few moments ago on twitter.

I need everyone to take a deep breathe before screaming about sense8 and comparing it to the get down. These two shows are similar in some aspects but these are still very different situations.

The Get Down had a high budget because Baz Luhrman wouldn’t give up on his vision for the show in order for it to be made more affordable for Netflix (I am not criticizing that, that is his right as a artist to mantain the integrity of his work), the show also wasn’t nearly as popular as Sense8 and as he said on his own facebook page, Baz Luhrman is already working on a film project while the get down was in the ‘limbo’. 

Now, about Sense8. It is one of Netflix’s most successfull shows (audience wise), the budget can and probably will (as it was hinted in the end of season 2) be made more affordable by just changing the shooting locations (if they visit less countries/cities by keeping the cluster in the same spot for a while) and lana wachwoski is extremely commited to the show, even with her sister’s absence she still managed to write and direct season 2, it took more time and effort but it was done and delivered. 

The Get Down and Sense8 are both shows with diversity and high budgets, but their similarities end there. I am a fan of TGD and that can be confirmed on my personal acc and I am mad and sad about it being cancelled but sense8 is a whole other deal. And I am not saying I am 100% sure the show will be renewed, no one is sure about that, maybe not even the folks at Netflix. However, it can’t be compared with The Get Down since these are two different situations and we have gone throught this exactly situation before. Way back in 2015, we had to wait nearly two months for them to announce the second season because they wanted to give us the news on August, 8 (the sensates’ birthday).

So, let us not worry that much. And about the campaign on twitter, I am all for it. It is good for netflix to always be sure they have a audience for this amazing show and have no doubts about the future of our beloved sensates. 

- R.