Hey folks. I need a favor.
I’m asking you all for some kind of accountability. I have been spiraling for a good solid two weeks now and I have probably wrecked a couple of friendships over it. I learned all about some trigger points I have and how they affect me. This was a really bad one. It’s had me yelling at people I love, being unreasonable, being combative and reactionary, crying, isolating, and basically being a complete fucking nightmare. I’m only just now coming out of it, and I’m still feeling a bit hypersensitive.
I’ve considered meds (but found the risks more than I’m comfortable with given my current situation) and I go to therapy, and right now I’m on a waiting list for a cognitive behavioral therapy program (that honestly seems like the best tool I’m going to find). That being said, in the short term my coping skills suck. The only thing that I know for a fact works for me with any regularity is exercise and getting outdoors. Of course I have an excuse for that too and I haven’t been working out because I have some negative body issues, I don’t deal well with street harassment (especially the “are you trans?” and “you look like a man” type that I’ve encountered on my runs in the past) so I’ve been avoiding it.
Basically, I need to start exercising again because it’s the only surefire tool I have in the short term. I don’t want to turn this into a fitness blog, and I don’t want to upset anyone with posts about body composition (or recomposition), weight, or running/exercise posts, but I do want to start keeping a sort of daily fitness/wellness check-in. I’d like to know what people’s thoughts are on a post a day about my personal exercise goals being part of the normal feed here. You can respond to the post or in an ask.
Thanks in advance. I know a lot of folks have expressed interest in trying to help me in various ways, and this kind of accountability is a real concrete thing that you all can help me with, but only if you’re ok with it.