this scene is so often over looked

Went and saw Beauty and the Beast, and I just had to share my experience because it was so pure?

So, like, I get into the theater, find myself a nice spot smack dab midscreen, which is WAY EASIER without thirty people traipsing in behind you in a group, lemme tell you, and I’m just sitting there, by my lonesome, scrolling tumblr and watching whatever weird stuff they’ve got on screen, and a family comes to sit in my row, which was the only empty one not right in front of the screen. Sat down what I thought was a seat away from me until I saw a little girl in an adorable ass red dress climbing over mom and dad to sit next to me. 

Totally fine. I was just off of center and they got to sit right in the middle of the screen, and when she finally gets settled this little girl looks up at me, with a soda half her size in one hand, and somehow both popcorn and candy in her tiny little lap, and she stage whispers to her mom:

“She’s by herself!”

Mom looks embarrassed, but I smile and wave off the apology. 

I go back to my phone, only to realize someone is tugging at my sleeve. Little girl looks up at me, all wide eyes and curiosity, and holds out a napkin filled with popcorn and chocolate. Like, I remember being a kid, and I remember how important candy and popcorn at the theater are, and I think she thought she was saving my life by offering this sustenance.

I almost fucking cried guys, kids are the best.

So I take it and thank her and let her talk my ear off for a few minutes until she needs a drink because she has been talking SO MUCH her mouth is dry. This kid is going places, guys, I’m telling you right now, because she picked up that cup the size of her torso like a champ and angled the straw just right and continued to try to talk to me around her gulps.

While this is happening, on the other side of me another mom and daughter sat down, and, turns out, the girls know each other. I’m guessing, based on the gumption of Red Dress, that they probably met in the lobby before they went into the theater. 

Girl number 2, I’ll call her Princess Dress, because it was a fantastic dress and when I told her so she proceeded to point to every princess along the neck and name them and give me their Stats, proceeds to have a conversation across me with Red Dress.

Both sets of parents were looking like they wanted to bury their heads in their hands, but I was having a blast.

Anyway, eventually lights go down, we get into the movie, and for the most part Red and Princess were content, although every so often Red made sure to pass me a handful of sticky half-melted chocolate. 

Watching a live action version of a movie that I watched for the first time when I was their age was a fuckin’ trip, man. Like. I got super emotional over things I didn’t expect to, and during the wolf scenes I was actually mildly distressed, because Princess was gripping the hand rest so hard on my right I thought she was gonna break it. Any scene I laughed or snorted at got a peal of laughter from my two new best friends, so hopefully no one has to go home and explain why I nearly snorted out my drink during “Be Our Guest” when they went for a visual gag for “After all miss, this is France!”.

During the ballroom scene, Red turned to her mom and whispered “The Beast is handsome!” and it took so much for me not to lean over and whisper back “Girl same.”

But my favorite, MY VERY FAVORITE part of this whole experience was when Gaston shot the Beast - FOR THE THIRD TIME HOLY HELL I KNEW IT WAS DARK BUT GODDAMN THIS IS A KIDS MOVIE ISN’T IT - Red patted my arm because yeah, okay, I was maybe crying a little, look, I know what happens but the movie made me feel things okay. Anyway, she like, pushes herself up in her seat and leans in close and she goes “It’s okay. He’s gonna be okay.”

The point is, children are so pure, and everyone should always watch movies with strangers.

The bad ass historical women we need to remember this month.

It’s officially Women’s History Month, which means it’s time to celebrate the many accomplishments that are so often looked over throughout the rest of the year.

Nellie Bly - Nellie Bly entered the journalism scene in an unabashedly feminist way, by submitting a letter to The Pittsburgh Dispatch that rebutted one writer’s diatribe about how women belonged in the home. An editor saw Bly’s potential and hired her in 1885. Just two years later, Bly famously posed as a mental patient on Blackwell’s Island for a New York World expose; a few years after, she that took a record-setting, 72-day trip around the world, writing about it for the same paper.

Agent 355 - Long before 007, there was 355. History books would do well to liven their account of the American Revolution by mentioning this member of the Culper Spy Ring, America’s first elite spy network. One of George Washington’s most valuable spies, the woman known only as “Agent 355” was likely the only one who could rock an evening gown while gathering information critical to the colonies’ achieving independence. 

Murasaki Shikibu - Little is known about the Japanese author credited with writing the world’s first modern novel, The Tale of Genji, other than that she certainly overcame plenty of obstacles to do so. Even her name is an invention, drawn from one of the novel’s characters and the author’s father’s job, according to Encyclopaedia Brittanica. Not only was Shikibu educated — a rarity for women at any point for most of history, but especially around the year 1010 — but she also became literate in both Japanese and Chinese.

Maria W. Stewart - Though her name is (unfortunately) not one often included in history books, Stewart can claim plenty of impressive firsts. She was the first American woman to speak to an audience of mixed genders and races, as well as one of the first African American woman to deliver any public speech at all.

Pauli Murray - Pauli Murray wore many hats, and each one was equally impressive. Murray became a civil rights lawyer in the late 1940s, a particularly impressive feat given that women in general, let alone black women, had been prohibited from becoming lawyers only decades before.

Read more about these women and 5 others we must never forget.

A Plethora of Dates With Peter Parker...

The Movie Theater 

  • Peter always taking you out to see the newest Sci-Fi films and definitely the newest Star Wars (but it’s his second time seeing it, since he promised Ned he would always see it with him first)
  • “Peter, can I please see Star Wars again in the theaters with you and [Y/N]?
  • “No, Ned! It’s a date… between two people only!”
  • “But it’s my favorite!”
  • “Ned, you say that about every Star Wars movie!”
  • Always finishing the popcorn before or during the previews
  • Peter constantly making sure you are comfortable and have the best seat in the house (this means getting to Star Wars showings at least an hour early)
  • “Are you cold? Do you want my jacket? Can you see the screen okay?”
  • “The man in front of us has a giant hat on, and I can’t see over it!”
  • “Excuse me, sir. Do you mind taking your hat off? My girlfr- NED! What are you doing here?”
  • “Hi, guys! How’s your dateeee?”
  • Finally giving in and letting Ned sit next to you during Star Wars (Peter and Ned regularly looking over at you for your reaction to their favorite scenes)
  • NEVER doing anything naughty in the theaters because you both want to respect the actors, directors, and all the hard work put into the film PLUS you wouldn’t want to miss anything important!
  • However, you often hold Peter’s hand or lay your head on his shoulder (or vice versa)
  • Peter shout-whispering to you when something awesome happens in the film
  • “Aw, man! Did you see that? That was so cool!”
  • Occasionally watching Peter instead of the movie. The look of pure amusement and enlightenment on his face. Adorable.
  • After the movie, you set aside a half an hour (or an hour for Star Wars) to have long discussions about your favorite parts, the science, the filming, the music, or how the film made you question the meaning of life
  • “Babe, that movie was amazing! My mind is officially blown. We should go to my apartment right now and try to creat-”
  • Always Every once in awhile you have to kiss him to prevent him from rambling on about the movie too much

Art Museum

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Izuku the "entertainer"

So, after re-reading some of my favorite scenes over and over again, I noticed today how often Izuku really surprises, amazes or shocks Toshinori. Honestly, Toshinori may be a dork, but he has got himself and his expression under control quite properly most times. But when it comes to Izuku? Then he gets flabbergasted time and time again. Something about Izuku just manages to surprises him even after all this time… there really is a reason why Toshinori calls Izuku an entertainer repeatedly!

Look at this:

How they met, and All Might completely loses it at Izuku’s “enthusiasm”:

Hearing that Izuku is not that different from the boy he once was himself:

Izuku rushing into danger to save Kacchan:

Smiling like his idol would, making him remember what being a hero means:

Izuku overworking himself to reach his idol:

 … and doing more than even All Might anticipated:

Keep reading

Drafting: Four Methods For Highly Anxious Individuals

(This is a revised version of an old post you might have seen elsewhere.)

Is writing really fucking painful for you? Do you finish a draft of a story maybe once every forty years? Is your computer littered with outlines and abandoned beginnings? Maybe you’ve been told to “write a shitty first draft” but have no idea how to do that because writing takes so much out of you that you can’t do it without at least trying to make it goodbut when you do, you inevitably give up and hate yourself.

Chances are, you’re drafting in a way that doesn’t respect the way your mind works. You’re either 1) forcing yourself to deal with too many things at once, or 2) you’re stifling the free, imaginative, playful part of your mind with premature critical evaluation. Or, most likely, both. But you can’t just make yourself stop doing this spontaneously. You need a method of writing that interferes with those habits. Think of it as mental ergonomics. If your back is sore and your neck is stiff, you need a different chair. Similarly, if writing is agonizingly painful, you need a different drafting method.

Here are four methods you can try—or adapt, experiment with, and combine. (Nobody practices a pure version of any method.) For simplicity’s sake, I’ll talk as if you’re faced with drafting a single scene:

1) The Pitch Meeting Method

Don’t write the scene in the actual narrative voice of the story. Instead, write as if you’re describing what happens to somebody you know, somebody who’d be interested and excited about it. You could, in fact, actually address it to someone. Or write as if you’re writing a really long headcanon post.

Write the way you talk. Use your usual slang and vocal rhythms, and get all of your enthusiasm in there, everything you envision, everything you want for this scene. You could even do this out loud and record it, if that’s easier.

Let your desires run wild, even if you don’t yet know how you’re going to fulfill those desires. Say stuff like “and this part is really emotional!” without worrying about how you’re going to make it emotional.

When you’re done, go back and find parts you can elaborate on. Make the description as detailed as you can.

Once you’re happy with this description of what you’re going to write, start writing it. Translate your “sounds like you” prose into a voice more appropriate to the story. But don’t change it too much. Don’t kill the energy your own voice adds.

2) The Expanding Outline Method

This one’s similar, but it works better for folks who like to think structurally.

Make an outline of the scene. Maybe it starts with only a couple of items: two very general things that happen in the scene.

Now take one item and break it down into several items. Then break those items down into several items. Zoom in closer and closer to the action, breaking actions and events down into their constituent parts.

You can include non-event, non-external items like “Character feels [x].” You can even include things like “The reader feels [x].” But go back later and add detail to those where you can. Just keep making your outline more and more specific.

Now, following your outline, draft a prose version of the scene.

3) The Anatomy Textbook Method

For this one, you start with the scene itself, not with a plan for the scene. But don’t try to write the entire scene fully fleshed out in one go. Rather, start with a single element you’re most comfortable with. The dialogue, for instance. Or a description of the action in a bare-bones, stage-directions sort of way. Lay down a skeleton of the scene, and don’t worry if it looks a little…sparse.

Now go over it and add another element on top of that skeleton. Description, maybe. Or more details that flesh out your bare-bones description.

Keep doing this until you have a complete scene.

If you think you tend to leave a certain element out, dedicate a “layer” to that. I’m often quite sparing with characters’ emotional reactions, for instance. So I might go over the scene and do nothing but add in my character’s internal reactions to what’s happening.

You can divide the scene up however you like. The point is, each time you go over it, only focus on one element at a time.

4) The Sourdough Starter Method

This is probably the weirdest, and it might sound like the hardest, but it’s quicker and easier than it sounds. You just have to get comfortable with making a mess.

Start writing the scene, in all its nonsensical, inarticulate glory. Feel free to hate both the form and the content; just keep your head in the scene, walking your mind carefully through what happens, even if you think what happens is stupid. Don’t worry if what you write is boring or wrong or irrelevant, because you’re not actually going to use most of this.

Now read through what you’ve got. It may help to print it out. Go through what you’ve written and mark anything you kind of like or that seems promising. And if rereading what happens has given you new ideas about what should happen instead, write those ideas down too.

Review the promising bits and the new ideas. There might not be much, but that’s okay. Now, start the scene over. Wipe the slate clean and write it all again from scratch. But this time, include those good bits you discovered in the previous version.

You’re not revising that version. You’re using it as a petri dish to grow ideas for the scene. And then you completely rewrite the scene, this time with a little more focus and a better sense of what will work.

You might only do this once, but some people do it several times. It sounds labor-intensive, I know. But remember, each time you write the scene, you’re just barfing it onto the page without much critical scrutiny. And that scrutiny is mostly what makes writing feel so hard.

So those are four methods you can try. I’m sure many more exist. If you’ve tried or know about any, please send them to me!

Next post: the theory of shitty first drafts

Ask me a question or send me feedback!


I don’t know if this counts as a near death experience in the classical sense, but when I was younger I was abused by my family and found refuge by who I later found out was a pedophilic rapist and murderer.

He had confessed to me about his crimes, because I was just a lonely kid, explained to me how he did it, but he must have seen something in my face, and suddenly punched me in the face, then dragged me in the next room which windows didn’t point towards the street. I can’t fully recollect what happened next, but he must have partialky undressed, choked and beat me, before pulling out a hunter’s knife from under his bed, and pressing it against my throat.

It was all so weird, because when he threatened to slice through my skin, I saw it as if I was a bystander, not as if I was in my own body (though I have memories of the look in his eyes which I can only describe as “depraved”). I don’t know WHY he let me go, but I saw myself running, not having taken any of the clothes he pulled off, and it took an unknown amount of time before my memories are from first person perspective again.

Since this incident I often leave my body and float over the scene, and it’s quite freaky.

Now I know that it’s a common response to life-threatening trauma, but it still feels like the line that held my body and consciousness together was snapped.


Feeling unsettled about not seeing each other. (x)

Book!Gems I wish the BBC had included

 D’Artagnan showing up, alone, at the monastery to get Aramis like “I am so tired and hungry and have had such a hard time Aramis let’s go” but Aramis is like “First let me read you my thesis and also some poetry…I can’t get you real food but we do have spinach” and d’Artagnan’s entire reaction

Athos teaching his manservant a form of sign language so there’d be at least one person he wouldn’t have to speak verbally with

Athos locking himself and his servant in the cellar of this dude’s inn and drinking all his wine, ransacking all his groceries

D’Artagnan being so overwhelmed by Athos’ angst, so awkward, so uncertain how to respond so he just pretends to fall asleep and Athos lowkey finds it adorable like “aw look at this. lightweight. #BlessHim”

D’Artagnan showing up to talk to Athos. Wearing a dress. And Athos not even batting an eye.

The Inseparables teaching d’Artagnan to play tennis but he nearly gets smacked in the eye by the ball and panics, “I have to meet with the king I cannot go to the palace with a black eye” and that one guard dragging him about it so d’Artagnan chases him all over Paris on a duel and actually kills the guy. The king finds this hilarious and gives everyone money I’m crying

Papa “Do not sell this horse” d’Artagnan, Charles *Immediately Sells the Horse* d’Artagnan

Athos “d’Artagnan don’t do the thing” de la Fere, Charles “Athos I did the thing it went about as well as you expected” d’Artagnan

D’Artagnan’s hysterics over Constance and Athos initially trying to calm him down but then just telling him to go ahead and weep, d’Artagnan actually fainting from being so upset about Constance

Athos “You jostled my injured shoulder, prepare to die” de la Fere


Athos being the leader of the Charles d’Artagnan fanclub

D’Artagnan making smalltalk before his duel like “is your arm okay for fighting?” and then apologizing to Aramis and Porthos because he’s that sure Athos is going to kill him before he can fight them I mean in what way was that not pure gold c’mon son

The Boys scrounging for food and they all contribute and then d’Artagnan being like, “I know a guy who has chocolate”

Rochefort and d’Artagnan hating each other to such an extent they kinda bond over it

The musketeers forming a Friendship Walk so many across it takes up the entire street

D’Artagnan fighting Rochefort at that inn and then getting the hell beat out of him by everyone there, subsequently fleeced, and then showing up at Treville’s office like “look man, I got nothin’”


That one scene where Athos spends like half an hour giving d’Artagnan a detailed play-by-play of gambling, losing all their stuff, winning some back, losing it again, while d’Artagnan steadily wilts on the spot.

D’Artagnan’s tendency to exclaim/whisper/mutter/hiss “merde !” so often it’s practically his catchphrase

D’Artagnan being lowkey insulted and quite honestly alarmed by life in general

Second Love (Yoongi x Reader) w/ visuals

- pt 1 -

summary: he didn’t believe in love, but then he met you

words: 6,419

genre: fluff, angst(maybe??)

a/n: i don’t know how to feel about this i kinda hate it. a lot of dialogue in this one. wasn’t sure if I wanted to post this but it’s been sitting in my phone for a few months so I’ll just leave it here. I might make a part two, depending on how much people like it / request for it. might include smut in the next part :-)

Min Yoongi was a busy person. He didn’t have time for love or for any other close relationships besides with his band members. He didn’t want any scandals or any other miscellaneous things interfering with his work and the success of his group.

Of course, he loved his family and he loved his members, and he especially loved ARMY, but when it came to romantic love, he didn’t believe in it. He always felt that it was such a nuisance. A romantic relationship wouldn’t work out anyway, considering the fact that he was an idol. He didn’t have time for it, and he also knew how all relationships went. The smallest of doubt in a relationship could easily split the pair apart, ruining the bond and friendship that once was.

He found it hard to believe that romantic love was even a thing in this world because of all of the cheating, lying, and mistrust going on between couples. Even if there were no problems with the couples, they were just going to lose feelings for each other anyway, stuck in a bitter, unsatisfying relationship. He had seen it all before.

He was committed to his music only. After all, it was his first love.

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Tip & Tricks on Dialogue

hey y’all. so I thought I’d impart some knowledge about how to craft good dialogue because I think sometimes not feeling confident in one aspect of writing can discourage people from doing it all together. And it can be especially tricky with Check Please! (since you’ve never had the chance to physically hear the characters talk). 

so here’s a few things to consider the next time you write 

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zethany  asked:

I am so, so, SO very sorry if this has already been asked before. I did some digging through your tags and I couldn't find answers for my particular question... So I apologize in advance if I just didn't do enough digging. I've had a lot of issues with dialogue sequences that go back and forth between two or more characters. I find myself repeating the same phrases such as, "he snickered" and "she cried." Eventually, I just end up using very convoluted word play. Do you have any suggestions?

What you’re asking about here are dialogue tags. There are two schools of thought: Vary the verbs, or don’t fret the “saids.” This is one case where the best practice probably lies somewhere in between. How far you go with different verbs vs. said is up to you as the writer.

There’s another way to break up dialogue, too. It’s my own personal preference, and that’s the use of descriptive beats, sometimes called dialogue beats, narrative beats, etc… This article here describes the two in more depth, but essentially:

Dialogue tag: “You don’t know what I want,” he shouted.

Descriptive beat: “You don’t know what I want.” He slammed the book on the table, knocking over Gena’s wine. 

Both convey anger. Both can be “the right way,” depending on your characters, your style or the needs of the scene.

I tend to write my dialogue either without any tags or just minimal tags when I get started. Often, it literally looks like this:

A: “You’re a jerk!”

B: “Yeah, but I’m your jerk.”

A: “Can’t you stop being a jerk then?”

B: “Are you saying you want to dump me?”

Then, I try to block the scene (much like blocking a stage play) so that I know what the characters are doing, where they’re standing, or other cues that can help with the descriptions. Where no description is needed, I start with said, or asked and replied if appropriate. 

Dialogue beats also help convey something I see a lot of new writers and fanfic writers shying away from, and that’s inner monologue. Your Point of View character can have thoughts during a conversation that can add insight or seamlessly add exposition to avoid infodumping. You’ll find more than a few experienced writers whose dialogue scenes have a lot more inner monologue than external dialogue. You probably just don’t realize it. [Hint: That’s a good thing.]

Favoring descriptive beats over tags means you need to make sure your readers can follow. It’s the one thing I work on the most during editing, too. Again, don’t let fretting over saids and tags and beats ruin your creative flow on your first draft. 

Here’s another good summary of the process. 

Also, make sure you punctuate your tags correctly. Not doing so can be one of those distracting mistakes that can turn readers off and I guarantee will bug the crap out of an editor. 

Now, go. Experiment. Have fun. Enjoy your characters and let them enjoy their dialogue!

– mod Aliya

Unintentional Chapter Two: Phone Calls

Chapter Summary: Things have been strange on set since you’d filmed those scenes with Jensen. Things get heated during a convention.

A/N: I just wanted to say this now, this story is going to involve a lot of cheating. I do not condone cheating in any way, this is simply for the purpose of fiction <3

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: Phone sex, language (including dirty talk, but I guess that kind of goes hand in hand with phone sex?)

Word Count: 2.3k (oops?)

Unintentional Masterlist

Originally posted by pleasegivemecake

You were still aching for him. You pressed your legs together to try and help with the need for friction. There was lots you and Jensen needed to talk about. But you just, couldn’t. Then it would become real, and that would become a problem; and you had to avoid becoming the other woman at all costs.


Over the next couple of weeks, things had been…awkward between you and Jensen. No matter what you did, you couldn’t get him out of your head. You’d lie awake at night, watching old gag reels and outtakes, just to see him. Your heart would skip a beat when you saw him smile; and your breath would slip away when you heard his laugh.

You’d also been avoiding Misha and Jared. At least when Jensen wasn’t around anyway. When the four of you were together, there was too much goofing around to give either of them the chance to ask you about anything. They didn’t know about what had happened on set, but they could tell that something was up.

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Teach Me, Baby [Connor Murphy x Reader]

Title: Teach Me, Baby
Pairing: Connor Murphy x Reader
Fandom: Dear Evan Hansen
Requested: Nah
Summary: You’re tutoring Connor Murphy (your friend? Your neighbor? You have no idea who you are to him) at the request of his mother. While working on your Spanish homework, Connor asks if you wouldn’t mind teaching him something else with his lips :)
Warnings: Connor has a potty mouth | first person reader
A/N: This is my first time writing a DEH drabble. I didnt proof read. I’m taking requests ♡

“You ever think about what it’s like?”

His voice startles me from where I’m scribbling in Spanish on my notebook–Connor had been surprisingly productive up to this point. On most nights when I walked over to his house to work on homework, Connor was sprawled on the bed or the floor or the couch and complaining endlessly until I practically did the assignment for him.

Being his tutor was easier than being a friend, after all. But today, Connor had been oddly silent, asking soft questions every so often under his breath about reflexive endings and vowel additions. He ignored his mother as she passed by the open door every so often, smiling in fondly at what must be a very stock photo scene, declining with a ‘no thanks’ when she asked if they needed anything after looking at me expectantly.

We’re both cross-legged on the blue frayed quilt pressed neatly on his bed, the notes splayed messing between us. The door had been shut in frustration after Cynthia’s third check in, giving Connor enough pause to lean in hyperbole against the door, giving an over exaggerated sigh, pulling on his hoodie and tucking a stray strand of hair back into the bun on the top of his head.

He isn’t looking at me when he asks the question, he’s staring down at his workbook intently. From where I’m sitting, I can see his lips are pursed tightly, cheeks puckered from the effort, as if he wished he hadn’t said the words. I might’ve laughed given any other situation, at the cost of earning an outburst, but he’d been so quiet today I was worried my chuckle might make him feel…well, might put him in a place I didn’t want him to be in.

“What what is like?” I asked absently, making sure to seem nonchalant. I didn’t want to scare him away. Connor having a serious conversation about anything was such a rare occurrence I was terrified I’d discourage him from doing it in the future.

There was a beat of silence, then two, and I’d long since decided he wouldn’t answer at all when he blurts out: “kissing.”

I didn’t look up. My pencil, however, flew out of my hands across the bed, eyes wide where they were glued on my notebook which looked like nothing but white and black tv static at that point.

“Haven’t you kissed anyone before?” I asked, voice thick and terrified. I half prayed Cynthia would check up on us again, stop the conversation in its tracks. The other half was so terrified Connor would fly up from the bed and scream at me to get out and never come back–and I didn’t want that. I wasn’t so sure I was comfortable with this topic of conversation at all.

“Shut up,” he hissed, but it was half-hearted, so I knew he wasn’t upset. Curiosity always won out with Connor Murphy. “No, haven’t exactly had anyone wanting to take me up on offers.”

“I didn’t know you offered,” I joked, daring a smile out of the corner of my eye. He was watching me, I realized, half emboldened by my sudden shyness, but his gaze was soft, the smirk at his mouth playful. He wasn’t making a move, I realized with relief. He was just asking.

“I don’t, really, I guess,” he sighed, pushing the papers out of his lap and into the bag at the foot of the bed.

“Connor–” I scolded. We still had a whole other assignment to do.

“You ever kissed anybody?” He asked so suddenly, his head jerking up to state at me boldly. His stony eyes were wide, almost nervous,  and I watched his adam’s apple dip in the thin column of his throat.

“I, uh, no,” I sputtered, uncomfortably.
His dark eyebrows lowered, mouth folding into a thin line.  “Why not?”

I shrugged. “Never, uh, found a guy I liked, I guess.”

He quirked an eyebrow, so I elaborated: “You really gotta trust a guy, you know? Because if it’s with a stranger then it means something and it’s weird, but if you already know the person it’s like ‘oh, cool, bye, whatever–’.”

“You’re doing the Evan Hansen ramble,” he said with a wicked smirk on his pretty pink lips. I game a small smile back.

“Boys are weird,” I grumbled, focusing back on my Spanish, suddenly none of it making sense. I didn’t like the way my hair fell on my neck, making me too hot and my shirt suddenly felt too heavy and itchy.

“You okay?”

“Stop asking me weird shit,” I grumbled, folding in on myself around my notebook, shoulders hunched and knees high. Connor laughed–loudly, out of character, readjusting on the bed so that he actually faced me, the torn knees of his black skinny jeans brushing mine.

“’S not weird shit, dumbass,” he said congenially, tapping my leg lovingly with his pencil, before throwing it into his bag. “Aren’t teenagers supposed to be curious?”

“Porn exists,” I reminded him cheekily, watching as his pale face flared red.

“Not the same!” He sputtered, rubbing anxiously at the back of his neck. “It’s not–”

“You would know,” I snorted, flopping back, slightly flustered, against his pillows to hide my reddened cheeks.

“Shut up,” he growled. “And scoot over.”
I did as I was told, shuffling to the side and rolling onto my hip to give Connor room to slide up next to me, laying down and glaring at me.

“You’ve never thought about what it feels like?” He asked skeptically, eyebrows raised just slightly. I watched his hands to avoid his intense eye contact, the long thin fingers picking at a frayed quilt square between us.

“Course I have,” I muttered. “We were all fourteen once.”

“And you’re all grown up now, huh?” He teased, kicking me with his sock-clad foot. “You don’t think about boys anymore, huh? I don’t buy it. Don’t think Zoe hasn’t told me about the novels you stuff in your pillow case when you spend the night.”

“Traitor,” I hissed under my breath, feeling my whole face grow red.

Connor was still grinning widely, and it was such a rare sight that I took the moment to trace the crest of the apples of his cheeks, the deep lines around his smile, the cracks in his pink lips where the skin stretched just a bit too far.

“What about that Jake kid?” He asked suddenly, nudging me with his knee.


“The kid that’s on the debate team? Really fucking obnoxious, always staring at your boobs, has the hair?”

“Josh,” I snorted, stilling laughing at Connor referring to anyone but himself as the guy that 'has the hair.’ “He’s cute, I guess. He just seems kinda skeezy. Like he’d take you to prom to feel you up and then dump you, ya know?”

Connor frowned, eyebrows furrowed and eyes unfocused with their gaze somewhere in the vicinity of my clavicle.

“You don’t like him?”

“Christ, no. I’m too busy to deal with boys, Con, end of story.”

“You wouldn’t even do like, uh, casual shit?”

“No,” I hissed, immediately becoming uncomfortable. “Connor, what’s this about?”

“I don’t know how to kiss a girl,” he sputtered, face red, covering it with his lithe fingers. His black finger nails left crescent shaped indents just above his eyebrows as I reached up to circle his wrists with my fingers, dragging them away.

“I’m asking you, as a friend,” he muttered, laying beneath me. He still wouldn’t meet my gaze, chewing on his lip thoughtfully, before eventually closing his eyes. His hair was fanned out against the baby blue pillow, the soft curls enticing and beautiful.

Connor, who was all angles and edges and frown lines, laying still beneath me, eyes closed serenely, pink lips slightly parted. I eased my hand onto his chest, feeling the gentle rise and fall of his breathing accompanied by his heart jackhammering in his chest.

It was stupid, and I shouldn’t. I trusted Connor, to an extent. Part of me was worried he thought he could woo me like this–take advantage. He was still a man, after all.
The other half of me was worried. If I rejected him now or later on, he wouldn’t be okay and I wouldn’t be there to help him put himself back together once he fell apart. I wanted to half make sure he wouldn’t fall for me.

I reminded myself that Connor would probably never, ever be into me.

Connor rarely lied. He was blunt. Candid. It was admirable, if it wasn’t always so rude.
I rolled over in the bed just a little more, slotting my knee in between his, brushing my hair back from where it fell in front of my eyes.

“This okay?” I mumbled, shifting closer, using the hand that wasn’t propping me up to scratch soothingly at his chest, the thick cotton of the hoodie soft against my fingertips.

He nodded, eyes still closed. I couldn’t bite back the chuckle bubbling in my throat.

“What’s so fucking funny?” He hissed, beginning to sit up, but I pressed him back down with my hand.

“You’ll kiss me back, right?” I laughed, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. His eyes softened immediately, reaching up to take my hand, surprising me as he intertwined our fingers. Our hands were sweaty. “You’re just laying there like sleeping beauty. I feel like I’m stealing your virtue.”

“You’re funny, kid,” he grumbled, but nonetheless grinned where his lithe hands reached up to take my shoulders in his hands, pulling me back down to the mattress with him.

“You can say no,” he whispered against my ear, surprising me by pressing a kiss to my jaw. “I won’t be, uh, upset or anything.”

“I wanna,” I sighed, feeling him shiver beneath me, bring his knees up to frame my hips.

His hands surprised me as they snaked up my back at lightning speeds, taking my jaw none too gently and tipping it back, forcing me to finally look at him. His expression, unguarded and raw, knocked my breath out of my lungs. I wasn’t used to this Connor. I didn’t know this Connor.

I liked this Connor.

He was rough, yanking me too forcefully up to his lips, his fingers knotting violently into my hair and tugging before slamming his mouth into mine, his nose digging into the apple of my cheek.

He was all teeth, knashing and pressing much too hard, and I tried and nearly failed at smothering a giggle. It wasn’t bad, though it wasn’t necessarily good, it was just too…Connor. Too much of him to take this seriously.

Still, he commanded my presence again by groaning hard into my mouth, snaking a hand down and pressing hard against the small of my back. I tried to mutter 'baby, slow down, slow down’ but it was muffled by his overzealous kissing. He didn’t show any signs of noticing.

By the time he’d finished, I’d wrestled my expression into one of neutral positivity–I would probably be chortling like an idiot all night.

Connor was breathless, his pink lips now red rimmed and swollen from the abuse, a little wet. His eyes were bright, excited as he mumbled a, “Well? Was it good?”

I smiled sweetly, raking a hand through his now tangled hair, leaning down to peck at his lips softly.

“Okay, for a first try,” I conceded with a smile. “Little rough. Not bad.”

His eyes furrowed, lips moving into a frown. “Oh,” was all he said, moving to sit up, pushing me back off his lap. I rolled my eyes.

“It’s nothing a little practice couldn’t fix,” I mumbled, teasing, tracing over the fabric of his jeans. His eyes snapped up.


I nodded, leaning back onto my elbows before falling down at the foot of the bed, my hair fanned around me. “Do your worst.”

// saeran on a date would be such an awkward lil bean like he’s so cute but he’s never been on a date before save him

- All Saeran wants is to have a nice time– Why does his brother have to tag along? And also insist it’s a ‘date’? It’s not, it’s just some movie MC would like to see. He’s curious as well; nothing more. But yet his brother won’t stop screaming that his “ lil marshmallow ” is finding love. It’s enough to make him gag.

- But he can’t deny what he feels.. It’s like he wants to make MC have a good time. He cares for them a lot.. But he doesn’t know if it’s romantic or not. How would he? It’s new, a bit scary.

- He wears something simple, a black cotton sweater and some dark grey jeans. His brother wears a pink hoodie with white jeans. Side by side; They’re like day and night.

- The whole ride there Saeyoung is lecturing him on the proper way to treat someone on a date– it’s not a date Saeyoung..

But he ignores his twin and continues babbling on. Hold doors open, compliments, pulling out chairs.. It’s a movie theatre for crying out loud. Not a five star venue. But he does secretly take those tips to heart. He’s nervous.. It’s not that big of a deal but his brothers making his anxiety sky rocket. What if MC doesn’t have fun with him? What if he messes something up?

- Saeyoung seems to notice his brothers demeanor and sort of calms down with the overload of information. Changing to topic to go on about how he and Mary Vanderwood went on a date once. And how romantic it was apparently. Saeran just rolls his eyes at his brothers antics.

- He wanted to pick MC up from the apartment– But they insisted they’d meet the two at the theatre. He didn’t mind, but Saeyoung said it was rude at first.. They offered to drive themselves. Not rude at all.

- Once they get there, Saeran can’t wait to get out of that car and away from his brothers bullshit stories about all his dates. There’s no way Saeyoung’s attention span would even allow him to sit down and talk with someone for hours, he’d get bored too fast. Especially on a date with Vanderwood. A board of wood paired with a clown. Guess whose who.

- MC is waiting inside, they’re nervous since the twins were running a bit late. But relieved when the two show up.
Saeran compliments them, earning a wink and eyebrow wiggle from his brother. He just pushes him off, asking about the movie you all were seeing tonight. It was horror, MC picked it. Saerans a bit surprised but happy that they don’t like sappy stuff. He cant stand watching two hours of people gushing over each other on screen. Would rather see blood gushing in some chainsaw massacre. Much more entertaining, even if it’s not real.

- MC is squished between the two boys in the chairs, Saeran didn’t like Saeyoung sitting so close to them but his brother seems to constantly reminds him ’ it’s not a date right? ’ Much to his displeasure. Still.. He felt jealous.

- The movie is cheesy, he dislikes it right away. Has to hold back from screaming at the screen for the people to.. Oh, I don’t know; maybe not go into that dark alleyway? Pick the car? Drive away to safety? MC seems scared whenever something like this happens.. They hug themselves and squint their eyes. Really? It was all silly and fake; Just a movie.. But he felt bad for them. He wanted to protect them from feeling scared. He cant help but blush when they grip his shirt and squish their face against his chest when a man with a chainsaw shows up.

- He doesn’t really know how to react, so Saeyoung from across the chairs grabs his brothers arm and quickly places it over MC’s back– Much to Saerans surprise. He looks over to his twin with confusion, only getting a wink in return. He doesn’t really know how to comfort someone.. So he just rubs his thumb in place while his arm is wrapped around their back. Their breath is hot through his shirt, it feels like there’s butterflies in his stomach. Does he think they’re cute like this? Yes.. He usually finds this annoying when Saeyoung does it, but with MC he likes to feel so protective over them.

- This happens often; every time there’s a ‘scary’ scene. eventually when the movies over MC has to pry themselves away from Saeran. Their neck hurt from cuddling into him for so long, but it was worth it.

- Seven loudly groans and stretches as he stands up, his figure in front of the screen as the credits roll. Saeran stretches a little less obviously, helping MC up out of their chair as well.

- He didn’t think the movie was all that great, but he listens as his brother and MC chat back and forth about different scenes. He still felt weird.. Like his stomach was all messed up. He didn’t like it at all, it felt like anxiety but.. a little warmer.

- Saeyoung excuses himself to the bathroom, clicking his tongue and shooting finger guns towards his brother as he walks backwards towards the restrooms. Saeran had no idea why or how he puts up with this sometimes, but it leaves him and MC alone for a bit. He doesn’t really know what to say.. He feels shy all of a sudden while shuffling his feet.

“ Did you like the movie Saeran? ”
They smile at him excitedly with bright eyes; he smiles softly back to them with a slight nod.
“ It was alright.. ”
He shrugs– biting his lip as he shoves his hands into his pockets. He felt like he should do something but.. He didn’t know what.

“ You’d be amazing in a horror movie Saeran! I bet you’d know exactly what to do. Way better than those people. ”
They motion with their thumb to the theatre, implying him better as the characters on screen.
“ Sure as hell wouldn’t choose an alley over a car, that’s for sure. ”
MC laughs softly, causing Saeran to smile. He liked seeing them light up like that. It was nice..
“ Thanks for being here with me.. I— ah, appreciate it. ”
They barely blush, shuffling their feet as well when Saeran replies with a nod. Both of them felt like they should do something but.. Everything was sort of frozen.

“ I’ll text you tonight, Yeah? ”
MC says and starts to fumble with their car keys, looking up towards Saeran who looked flushed from the cold, His white hair covering bits of his forehead.
“ Yeah; Of course. ”
He nods slightly, this was awkward.. shit.. He felt like a little kid. He wanted to do.. Something– But he felt too embarrassed.
It’s like MC read his mind, because in an instant they lean onto their toes– Placing a second long kiss onto his lips, it was soft and quick but it took Saeran by surprise. Was that okay? Did they mean to do that?
“ Night Saeran.. ”
MC smiles as they move their hand to shoot him a soft wave– Climbing into their car that was parked outside the theatre.
“ Night.. ”
Saeran says basically to himself in shock as he watches them drive away, that was new. He didn’t even have much time to think about it before Saeyoung practically runs out of the theatre, hooking his arm around his brothers shoulder and laughing wildly. Saeran tried to push him off, But he wouldn’t budge.
“ Should I get ordained anytime soon? ”
He wiggles his eyebrows as he shakes Saerans shoulders, “ Shit man– You’re so awkward, I thought you were toast! But MC saved the date! They swooped in– You should have seen your face! ”

Saeran rolls his eyes with a flushed red complexion, muttering ’ stop it, shut up ’ as he breaks out of his brothers grasp and quickly walks towards the car in a huff– Saeyoung following closely behind, still laughing to himself. Why was he just watching? What a creep.

Kuroshitsuji Scenery Pt 1

Yana Toboso pays so much attention to small details in her manga which always amazes me. For example, the scenery is often very accurate to how it looks in reality or in historical documents (newspapers, drawings, photos,…). I’ve made a post about some scenes just recently but there are many more of them. So in this post series I want to collect all these scenes from the manga. Please correct me if I’m wrong about something or if I missed a scene. :)

Here’s part 1: chapters 1-11 (other parts will follow over the next weeks; you’ll find all parts here after I’ve posted them).

Ch 6: Fleet Street, London

Ch 6: Buck’s Row, London (Jack the Ripper murder scene; victim: Mary Ann Nichols)

Ch 8: Hanbury Street, London (Jack the Ripper murder scene; victim: Annie Chapman)

Ch 9: Miller’s Court, London (Jack the Ripper murder scene; victim: Mary Jane Kelly)

Ch 10: A gothic church (where Vincent and Rachel married; I’m not sure which church it is exactly but it could be the Church of Christ the King in Bloomsbury, London, for example)

Ch 11: St Augustine’s Church, Kilburn, London (not sure about whether it’s the right church for this one, either)

anonymous asked:

Hi! :) I recently watched 5.20 again, in which the relationship between Crowley and the boys is more explored. Upon hearing some interesting dialogue, I did a mini head tilt at the blatant sexual innuendo between every male character and Crowley in that episode, which leads me to ask: do you think Crowley is bisexual, or just uses this as a defense mechanism? Curious to hear what you think! :) this would definitely change the way I perceive Demon!Dean and Crowley's interaction later on.

Well, it’s heavily implied that Crowley is at least Bisexual if not Pansexual (in s11 he had an orgy whilst in a woman’s body with another guy and two women and had sex with the female demon in s10).

On top of that there are massively continuous insinuations that Crowley and Dean had a sexual relationship during the Demon!Dean era.

Crowley called it his bed when Dean had sex with Anne-Marie, the implication being that Dean felt comfortable enough to use it, because he had already done so with Crowley (the scene was played out like an openly sexual couple). 

Crowley implied that he and Dean had done “extraordinary things to triplets”:

Originally posted by shirtlesssammy

Which, if they were female would still mean Crowley and Demon!Dean got jiggy with each other as well as the triplets, let alone the fact that the only people we saw that were anything like potential triplets were the 2 male twins plus an additional guy who looked very similar in the background but was too far away to tell for sure but the twins and Crowley were also seen talking to each other another time in the same episode while Dean was singing, all watching Dean…

Meanwhile, their “break up” was EXACTLY coded as a romantic break up. Whilst their “getting together” was coded as a romantic getting together, with Crowley saying he was Dean’s mistress…

Later Crowley continues to allude to his time with Demon!Dean, making Dean very uncomfortable and looking like he wants to erase every part of these memories from his brain every time… 

I mean THIS scene:

Originally posted by angvlicmish

Is the most uncomfortable “thanking your ex for saving your boyfriend” scene… and then Crowley has to go and make it even worse, because that’s what Crowley does, he’s bitter so he plays it off by reminding Dean that he has “rubbed off all over you”… Dude. Please.

And how as a bi!dean fandom do we not talk about THIS MOMENT more often?!

“…well, you could…”

I mean… it’s crude but it gets the point across… Crowley knows from experience.

And then, think of all the times Crowley and Cas are portrayed as Dean’s opposite romantic interests, the “love chevron”, how Crowley saves Cas for Dean because he knows doing so is the only way it can work in 10x03, how Crowley and Cas “fight” over who is Dean’s boyfriend in the deleted scene of season 9 and 10, with it being made clear in the same episode as one of them (10x14) that it is CAS that Dean chooses. How after that Crowley is pretty bitter… just saying.

So yeah, I hope this helps clear it up…


“Thanks,” you whispered in a shy tone that wasn’t usual to you.

When you first met Sherlock, it was clear that you two wouldn’t get along very well. He was a stubborn as you were, but also smart and sharp in his deductions, working in ways that were very opposite to your habits. Forced to collaborate a few times, you two often argued over tiny details, leading most of the time to one of you leaving the crime scene, infuriated. All of this appeared to be silly now. As unbelievable as it seemed, Sherlock had saved your life from the murderer you were both looking for, even if he had no apparent reason to do so and his feelings towards you were quite clear.

“No need to thank me, I did it for the case. If the killer hadn’t chased you the way I planned it, he wouldn’t be caught now.”

You expected this kind of answer, but it didn’t cool you down.

“If there’s anything I can do, please ask. I would be glad to help out.”

Maybe it was just a trick of your mind, but it seemed to you that the shadow of a smile passed on the lips of the detective. It made you smirk, thinking that perhaps things will be quite different in the future.

SasuSaku 475: An Analysis

Okay, so, when I first read this scene in the manga a few years ago, I cringed. Then, when I first watched it in the anime, I cringed again. I was so annoyed that Sakura was reduced to begging Sasuke once again not to leave. This is often one of the scenes that antis will choose to back up saying that Sakura is weak. Then I watched it over again recently, and I noticed something different. Look at the frustration in Sakura’s face here:

She’s accepted that she can’t do anything to physically stop him at this point, which I think is incredibly frustrating for her. If you recall, during the flashbacks preceding Sakura’s release of her Yin Seal in 373, she remembers the rooftop scene.

Everyone knows that she trained so hard to be able to catch up to them and fight by their side, rather than hide behind them. But I think another reason was that she felt powerless when they turned against one another on the rooftop. The memory of it still upsets her, as you can see by the clenching of her fist directly after it. She couldn’t do anything to protect either one of the two most precious boys in her life from the other, which was a difficult pill to swallow. Had Kakashi not intervened, she would have died that day. How would you feel knowing there was nothing you could do to stop the two closest people to you from killing each other? That’s why she felt so awful about putting the entire burden of bringing Sasuke back on Naruto. Not only did she love Sasuke, but after seeing Naruto in the hospital upon his return from the mission to bring Sasuke back, she realizes that she didn’t want to lose Naruto either. Sakura knew the day would come where they would fight again. She wanted to have the strength to protect them from each other when that time came.

So, she’s finally caught up to them, they can finally fight with their backs to one another. Then, they’re both given power by a literal god in order to bring Kaguya down. Sakura still plays an important role in helping them defeat her, but she’s not quite on the same level as Sasuke and Naruto anymore. This is what’s frustrating to her. No matter how hard she had worked, no matter how long it took her to catch up to them, it seemed like she was always a step behind. She acknowledges this, and now she’s desperate. 

This is what I hated. Why CAN’T she do something more than beg and whine and cry? But Sakura isn’t stupid. She can’t defeat someone who’s been given power by the founder of shinobi. She could TRY, but how far would it get her? Her losing a battle to Sasuke wouldn’t convince him of anything, it’d give him what he wants. So, she does the only thing she can do at this point, knowing that it’s useless to try and physically force Sasuke to rethink his choice. The only person who can do that now is Naruto, but she doesn’t want it to get to that point. She loves him so much that she’s frustrated with herself for not being able to do more to save him, but she still tries. She puts her pride and frustration aside and begs for him to reconsider, because she knows the outcome won’t be good if they fight. She’s afraid to lose either one, or both, of them. She’s willing to do anything to change this undeniable fate they’re both destined for. None of this is about Sakura’s “selfish desires” to have Sasuke to herself or something. Kakashi is sure to let Sasuke know of her actual intentions. 

And what do Kakashi’s words of Sakura’s love prompt? Sasuke’s memory of his mother. 

More specifically, a memory in which his mother comforts his worries. 

She reminds him that he is worth being loved as an individual and that he is not just the shadow of his brother. His mother gave him confidence with her love. She restored his happiness with her love. And what is the ultimate characterization of a mother’s love? Selflessness. 

A mother would do anything to ensure her child’s wellbeing and happiness. SP usually does a horrible job with SasuSaku scenes but I think them including this parallel here is really important. Sakura can’t physically stop Sasuke, but she’ll do anything to try and make him happy, including beg. Think of how Mikoto would react to Sasuke’s choice. She would beg her son to stop, promising him that she’d do anything for him to reconsider. 

Once Kakashi makes it clear to Sasuke that Sakura’s intentions are purely selfless, he’s reminded of the one person who had an unconditional love for him. Sasuke nearly killed Sakura, and yet she loved him and worried for his wellbeing. Only someone like a mother could give a love so pure. 

He makes the connection here. If his mother could be taken from him, who’s to say that this girl who loves him selflessly won’t be taken from him? Her love for him is on par with that of the Uchiha, the one that lead to their ultimate curse. In his dreams of revolution, there’s no room for someone who is willing to give all of their love to him. He recognizes Sakura’s selfless love for him here, comparing it to his mother’s, but does not want any more of those ties because they seem to always fail him. That is, until Naruto changes his mind. 

anonymous asked:

I struggle with Dean still doing random hookups, like many other viewers. It's hard to not let it turn me bitter. But if it helps anyone, i try to look at how it's different now than in the past, and what it means for Dean's arc as a whole. First off, in recent seasons, Dean's hookups are few and far between. And when they happen, it's usually at a time of high emotional stress, often coinciding with worry/loneliness regarding Cas. In other words, in short, they're no longer "dude bro" moments.

Hi there! And yeah, I can see surface-reading why people find it upsetting. And even if I couldn’t understand why people think it looks bad on the surface, most of my inbox today is just fretting over that scene in various degrees ranging from exasperated to distraught to resigned. So yeah, I get it.

Note to people sending me these sorts of anons, these are the things I don’t normally publish, because I’ve already written extensively on my own read on the scene, and it gets to the point where even I can’t really say anything new on the subject, as long-winded as I can be. :P

But as another anon suggested, perhaps we’re “reaching” in our destiel-positive interpretation of this particular scene… I’d like to suggest that since we’re being clobbered in the face both by Cas-adjacent subtext AND seeing a giant BS grace every flat surface in that diner, that we’re being rather forcefully prodded to make that reach.

Dean has, from the first season of this show, used sex as a coping mechanism, typically when he was feeling rejected or fearfully alone. And the parallels between this episode and 5.14 are practically punch-you-in-the-face levels of powerful.

In an episode were Famine told Dean that he was essentially a void and had no real desires for ANYTHING, yet Dean described himself as “well fed,” in that he satisfied each need as it arose and never let it become a desire. He essentially took what he needed when he needed it, in a weird sort of self-medication strategy that I identify with SO FREAKING HARD it’s actually kinda terrifying to me.

(and it’s been suggested that what Dean craved most was actually abstinence, in a sort of zen-calm way that he’s been living since about 12.14 again…but I think it has more to do with calm, with stability, with balance than actual abstinence)

(strangely in that episode the only thing Dean truly seemed to desire, and the one thing he put himself in jeopardy over, that he risked his personal safety for, he gave Cas about two whole seconds to retrieve Famine’s ring before charging in after him, running to his rescue. Which was about the amount of time Sam counted off before Dean charged into the diner in 12.10 where Cas was meeting Ishim…)

And yeah, Dean lampshaded it himself in 12.11, that his hookup with the waitress in that episode was his first in a really long time and he didn’t even remember it, so it was “like it never even happened.” And this is the first time since 12.11 he’s hooked up with anyone else, as far as we’ve seen. Before that when was his last hookup that we know of? 11.13? It’s been a while…

And what prompts this sudden and unexpected hookup? The huge void he’s currently feeling after Cas dropped THOSE WORDS on him in 12.12 and then  suddenly disappeared during 12.15 after obviously maintaining at least regular phone conversations with Dean up to that point. (I’m thinking really strongly of the parallel overlapping phone calls in 12.15 where Sam tells Mary “I love you” while Dean’s signing off with Cas… because they only have one more phone call after that before Cas stops answering, won’t return his messages, and can’t even be located with his phone’s GPS.

Last Dean knew Cas was hunting for Dagon and closing in… which is scary enough in itself but then post 12.17 when Dean didn’t hear back from Cas after he let him know they had a strong lead, and then STILL hasn’t heard from Cas after reporting in the details of their run in with Kelly and Dagon…

I mean Dean does NOT want to think about it but it’s GOT to be eating away at the back of his brain oh my god what if he’s dead what if he found Dagon and he’s dead now… And that is a place he absolutely cannot let his mind wander off to.

but seriously what the hell else would keep Cas from answering for THIS LONG… oh my god could this be the cosmic consequence? did he get himself killed for me and i wasn’t even there to stop it? is it all my fault anyway?

So Dean goes into this diner where EVERYWHERE HE LOOKS is a little ping of CAS CAS CAS from the big “Gus” that from 10 feet away might look like Cas to the mounted fish on the wall to the lost dog sign to all the people in tan coats that suddenly seem to be all the rage everywhere… It’s like he’s being subconsciously haunted by Cas. And the yawning void inside him needs to be filled immediately.

(so he creepily picks the one woman in the place that looks like a young version of his mother and chats her up with the worst line in history and a painfully pasted on grin and gets away from the diner and from Sam who’s telling him everything will be fine, and…)

How is anything in that scene NOT about Cas? And how is this, at all, “reaching.” It’s more like trying to keep from suffocating from how heavily the show was trying to pile it on there.

Which only adds to the sense of “claustrophobia” in the episode (that @postmodernmulticoloredcloak was talking about here. And I think it’s also relevant to how Dean is personally feeling right now. He feels isolated (from Cas, from Mary, and even to a degree from Sam because he feels Sam may be keeping secrets from him still…), he’s frustrated about not having been able to make contact with Cas yet, he does not like having to report to the MoL and be at their beck and call, he feels a creeping sense of violation in knowing that “his home” is not really his, or truly safe for him, after Mick popped in in the previous episode, nor does he like the MoL’s oppressive “Code” and is wary because of the way he and Sam routinely violate it… He’s worried about Mary. But mainly? The thing he was upset about through the entire opening segment? Was Cas. And the worry is smothering him.

When Dean feels emotional stress, he resorts to the appropriate outlet for countering it. Worry and loneliness >>> sex.

If he was angry about something, he’d be drinking or fighting. But he’s not angry, he’s worried. And this is his go-to coping strategy. Sublimation.

For an organization of supposedly compassionate beings, the Jedi Order sure has a lot of bullying. What’s especially interesting is that most of the perpetrators are ‘righteous’ or ‘popular aggressor’ bullies. While many bullies are low status people looking for attention or a measure of power, righteous bullies are usually higher status individuals reinforcing the existing social order. More over, they often do so with the tacit approval of authority figures.

Based on the Kanan comics, Caleb Dume was bullied during his time at the Temple. Caleb asked a lot of uncomfortable questions to the visible annoyance of his instructors and his peers took advantage of it. 

In this scene Caleb asks a question and his classmate physically assaults him while turning it into a ‘lesson.’ Yoda breaks it up when Caleb starts bleeding, but he doesn’t reprimand his attacker, he just sends Caleb off to get medical attention. She continues to bully Caleb throughout the arc, calling him names, belittling him, and spreading malicious rumors about him and his mentor. The narrative heavily implies that she’s jealous that he’s such a gifted student despite being younger and is bullying him to reestablish her ‘rightful’ authority over him. 

The same thing happens to Obi-Wan & Anakin comic. 

Anakin is a more talented Force-user than these kids who’ve been studying it there whole lives, so they remind him of why he’ll always be beneath them. Once again, their instructors are present, but it is Anakin who is reprimanded and made to apologize when he tries to retaliate. 

The bullying doesn’t stop when Anakin becomes a knight, although it does become more subtle. All throughout The Clone Wars, Anakin is bullies by his Jedi colleagues, yes, including Obi-Wan. During the war, his fellow Jedi: force him to do certain things because they are triggering (the movie, 2.04, 3.11-13); humiliate him in front of his superiors (1.02, 2.05 ) and subordinates (1.06, 2.17); spread malicious rumors (2.06); and belittle him (too many instances to count, thanks, Obi-Wan). Of course, it’s all done in the name of giving him a lesson, reminding him of his place, or testing to make sure he belongs there. Righteous bullying at it’s finest.