One of the reasons I love RayK is that, despite the fact that he and I are pretty much opposites and also in spite of some the wackier moments when he does things that don’t make sense (a la the radiation poisoning panic attack), he often comes out with things that make me suspect that the way he sees the world and the way I do aren’t so different after all. For example, two RayK quotes are probably amongst the top 10 tv quotes that absolutely speak to me on a deep emotional level:
- Right. Right. Like you can’t go forward until you go backward. Like I tried to run away from my past, but you can’t do it, cause it’s in your skin, it stays with you. You gotta retrace your steps to figure out how you got here. I took this bus, I drove this car, I got on this train, I walked down this street, I turned this corner, I opened this door, and I stepped into a bank.
Yeah. Yeah, man, sing it RayK. Maybe it’s just being an American watching largely American tv shows, but I’m used to characters talking about how the past doesn’t matter and the future may not come and why not live in the present? RayK…gets that it doesn’t always work like that, and I’d never heard anyone phrase it in a way that struck such a cord in me before and I still haven’t in the years since.
- Look, I may be damaged, Fraser, but I’m not stupid. There’s more to life than dying.
Once again, sing it, RayK. Except this time, he’s telling me something I need to hear, not something I instinctively know. As everyone who follows me has probably heard a million times over, I identify heavily with Fraser, and I have the same tendency toward the kind of tunnel vision that can end up throwing yourself, other people, and anything but that one thing under the bus. This is a great tendency to have when, say, you’re writing a paper on a deadline, but can also be pretty damaging if you don’t manage it.
On the other hand, the first bit of the quote speaks to me in a way that does instinctively make sense: I may be book-smart, but I’m people-dumb sometimes, and it’s definitely exasperated by anxiety and depression and, heck, having to deal with any kind of tragedy, in my life or someone else’s. But just because I’m damaged, just because I don’t navigate the situation intuitively, doesn’t mean that I don’t get it. And, heck, the whole context of “I may get this less than you, maybe I’m emotional and overreacting, but I know what’s smart for me and what isn’t and you gotta give me a better reason to go with this,” that’s–yeah. I get it, RayK, thank you for being articulate and succinct where I cannot.