this project is becoming my life right now. ; ;

anonymous asked:

I’m so sorry that you feel like tumblr’s becoming too toxic!!! I completely understand, but it’s such a shame that it’s hurting you >_< I absolutely love your work!!! Please don’t think that no-one cares!!! I absolutely do!!! I hope the time off helps, and good luck hun!!!

thank you, dear <3 i’ll still share my work here when i can! but right now i need to step back. i’ll be working on other projects and focusing on my personal life and i’ll be back when it feels right. thank you for being so supportive <3

a write-up of a bunch of my (angsty) aizawa headcanons that will probably make it into my fics someday, since i got asked about them and i’ve been wanting an excuse to write them up.

edit: holy shit this got so fucking long. oh my god. i’m so sorry that this is so long. there’s also just some regular headcanons in here too that aren’t as angsty. i really went overboard. i’m so sorry.

tw for discussions of abuse and neglect

-i mean, if you’ve read my fic(s) or followed me for very long, you probably know to some extent that i absolutely headcanon aizawa as having a pretty terrible home life. i’m gonna warn ya’ll right now that a lot of the stuff i’m gonna talk about is bordering on projecting. so, i talked about in this post, how… people don’t really become the way aizawa is without some sort of external force. i talked about there mostly in context with aizawa being extremely strict on his students and how it really gives off the feeling of trying to prevent something that happened at one point in time, but when dealing with his actual personality, there’s the glaring fact that he’s shown to pretty much shut down any and all emotion. this is a guy who i think confuses a lot of fans because he absolutely does not act on emotion at all and really, really does not show it. it actually seems like he deliberately goes out of his way to shove down any emotion and act only on logic. this is my roundabout way of explaining my headcanons.

-i have this headcanon that aizawa had a fucking miserable home life. like, as in, pretty heavily abused, especially for having/showing emotion. his parents were just complete assholes to him and did not support him in any way at all. as a result, aizawa very quickly learned a way of coping, which was actively shutting down any attempts at emotion at all. he’s still like this, because he’s spent the last 30 years trying not to feel anything, but he absolutely doesn’t push/encourage this for his classes. he actually tries to foster the opposite and ends up being concerned about his students’ emotional well-being

-his parents really just treated him like trash and in the end, it made aizawa really just- not care about himself or his general safety/well-being. he had no control at home and everything was subject to criticism in his family and he was constantly told to not peruse becoming a hero because he didn’t have a physical quirk and would never make it. he was probably even taunted that it’d be better fit for a villain than anything (like shinsou was). any achievements were ignored and his parents really just never cared about him. his health problems were pretty ignored, too, and he wasn’t actually diagnosed with any sort of eye problems or sleep disorder until he became an adult, though they were totally prevalent as a kid

-at least one of aizawa’s parents was a severe hoarder. like, piles of shit everywhere, and none of it is useful. aizawa grew up basically hating things and stuff because there was so much of it everywhere. not even his room/space was off limits. he had no control over it. as an adult, he has the extreme minimum amount of things in his apartment/house just because he hates stuff so much. he doesn’t buy anything unnecessary (unless it’s for the cats) and when he initially moved out and lived by himself, aizawa lived in the smallest, shittiest apartment possible and had no fucking furniture. it took an intervention from hizashi to get him to understand that even if you hate things and clutter, furniture is… kind of necessary (more on that later?)

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Hello all This is an update and somewhat a break regarding the tumblrs future and yes I am breaking away from the character description I started adding to each post.

As some of you who have followed the tumblr will know late last year I tried experimenting with a potential friendship problem adventure story that I had fun drawing with some of the scenariosI put book horse and apple horse in XD . But honestly since the beginning have struggled to come up with a humorous idea on how to warp it up. Not only that but in the recent months I have found myself losing interest or getting slightly stressed on what else I can do with Twi and AJ weekly This tumblr was inspired by Rarijack daily and I though Twijack would be a breeze but its not ,thats partly because I want to keep the images close to the cannon as possible and leave really shippy images to other twijack fans.

This is going to sound silly but I sort have lost my drive to make anything MLP at the moment, though considering I have been with the pony train since early 2011 you have to cut me some slack to essentially take a break from the world of Equestria and focus on other fandoms and personal projects which I have a lot of passion for right now )You can blame Anime for this ^^;). My new direction in my Life is to go in to Picture book / comics as a professional and I can not let side projects like Twijacky weekly eat up all my spare time then I desperately want to have something  unique original to do with jowybean. Now I am in no way shape or form saying I am leaving the fandom or going to become an antibrony I still find ideas popping in to my head for future  pony art and twijack images. I just find everything about MLP G4 kind of Meh at the moment.

Now regarding this information the tumblr is not stopping either its just not going to continue the friendship problem storyline or be updated weekly.  From now on it will be updated with cute sketches or illustrations of the duo only if I think they would make a great addition to the roster of Twijacky imagery I have previously made. I imagine when the new pony season and movie rolls around the inspiration will come rushing back to me and the enjoyment for the tumblr will be refilled :).

I apologise if this annoys/ disappoints you in anyway as i did the exact thing when I attempted luna comic in 2013-2014 and stopped that because well big fan projects for me are hard too keep on top of. I have been drawing way before G4 ponies was a thing guys and I have so many wonderful opportunities as a professional artist that I need to take advantage of before I regret missing them because of being a crony artist.

I feel more assured that I am sharing this with you now rather then letting it die slightly or press on and make it a chore that drains me. If i kept forcing the lacklustre twijack work guys, you would tell I was running dry on ideas soon enough. MLP just dose not have the same magic I felt for it in the early days and eventually it will in some way fade away for me. not ever die out just become another thing I enjoyed being a part of like any other geek thing in our life’s, trends come and go and its a natural response as time moves forward and we grow up in this crazy world.

Whatever happens with me and my love for MLP I applause the diehard fans that can enjoy everything pony to the fullest. And I am am very grateful for so many people taking the time and interest to follow this silly tumblr for two characters I really like.  

until next post which hopefully will not be too long Laters and bro hoof Jowybean

Real life, I’m sad to see you go.

This was supposed to be a painting for Adam’s birthday but I finished it last night and couldn’t make myself wait to upload it. Actually, I started on this last year and it was gonna be for his 30th but oh well… better late than never haha 

If I could say something directly to Adam, I could just sum it all up with a “thank you.” He’s been such a wonderful, positive, and uplifting presence/influence in my life for like 7 or 8 years now…in so many ways. From inspiring the vast majority of my artwork and stories in the past few years, to helping me cope with the harsh world and reality, making me feel like I’m not alone, to helping me recognize what a Holiness man should be like(and a Christian in general), reminding me of what’s important and always making me laugh! 

It’s such a blessing to have Adam’s music (and Adam) in my life and I honestly, truly, madly, deeply have no idea where I would even be right now if it (and he) wasn’t. Adam Young and his projects have become such a large and important element woven into the fabric of my life that if I don’t shut up now I won’t stop talking about it. :P

8

Cafe Larue et Fils

Location:  405 Rue Jarry E

Metro Station: Jarry

My midterms just ended and I’m finally taking a breath of fresh air. I’m claustrophobic in this structure we call reality and I feel like I can peep my head out of the prison a bit.

I’ve been feeling so overwhelmed with school and general real-life pressure. Don’t get me wrong, I love life and I feel lucky to be able to go to University. But it becomes a lot of weight on our shoulders. Work can pile up pretty quickly. There’s no more time for drawing or painting, playing music or doing anything hobby-like. There is time for doodles and iPhone photography, but nothing in a form of a project. And I sort of miss that. I miss being able to pour out my emotions to create. It’s too risky now. Once I rediscover the passion to make art, I’ll never go back to science again. But it’s all about balance, right?

Just a few days ago, I had the chance to go to one of my favorite bands’ concert. The Lumineers. I was looking forward to the date, but was too preoccupied with all my plans and assignments to really take a moment and realize just how excited I was for this show. I had bought the tickets a while ago and the date sort of creeped up on me a few days before the concert. 

But let me tell you, this concert gave me something I was longing for such a long time. Pure, raw, simple emotion. Music in its simplest form: an acoustic guitar, a tambourine and a cello. Beautiful melodies that made me feel so much - so much that I had repressed for the past few years in order to concentrate on school. 

I felt like I was out of my confined office for once. I realized I had put myself there. And as a consequence, became claustrophobic. 

Life is all about balance. And it’s also about survival. 

We all need those little things in life that keep us happy and keep us motivated to carry on and live through the hard steps. 

I need to play music, I need to doodle because it’s the way I preserve my true self. It’s easy to be confined. As much as we hate it, we put ourselves in that claustrophobic situation because we think it’s the most secure option. We destroy our true essence because we think it’s not good enough for the real world. 

Truth is - we need to get out of confinement - we need to breathe. We need to breathe to function and live and thrive. Without our pure happiness, who are we? 

I realized that going to coffee shops is a survival instinct. It’s my way to escape from reality and find happiness in a cup of coffee every morning. Yes, it’s disguised as my “spot to study” or my “spot to only get coffee before school” but it’s also my “spot to escape”. I may not go to concerts every day, I may not draw anymore, I may not pick up the guitar every weekend. I unconsciously prohibited myself from enjoying life that way in order to be a grown up. But the real human in me craved escapism and needed to get out of the little box. And if that’s in the form of coffee - so be it.

This cafe shown above is one of my favorite spots to go to before school. It’s on my way to Concordia and it’s also right in front of the metro. It’’s not time consuming to get here. The people are very nice. The playlist playing in the background is almost always swing music and it relaxes me each time. The lighting that comes in the cafe is like a glimpse from heaven - so nice to sit next to the huge windows. Their decor is warmed toned and also makes you feel warm inside. They always have beautiful plants and flowers around the cafe. PS: Try to look for some mini hidden origami in their plants… :)

The latte is amazing and their latte art is on point every single time. Plus, it’s on the coffee passport, so for you Indie Coffee Passport holders, don’t miss this place! There’s a Larue & Fils at Jean Talon also, but I haven’t been to that one yet.

So if you’re like me (and you probably are), get your daily fix here. We all need time to unwind.

More and more do I consider coffee as more than a beverage. It’s a way to keep us sane. It’s our daily routine that gives us some time to think about a simple cup of coffee. It’s a way to bring people together, it’s a way to enjoy yourself. 

Currently listening: Flapper Girl - Lumineers

S/O to all those who went to their show in Montreal <3

Why Disney shouldn’t NOT and make Elsa a Lesbian and shouldn’t give in to the demands

Ok so I didn’t exactly know how to title this and give the tone that I’m gonna write this with, but whatever. I wanted to give my opinion on this subject in the future, but given the recent events with GLAAD and the trend of the topic, I feel this is the time to speak. Now I know people is gonna be offended by this, personally I am not homophobic, I could care less what kind of genitals you are into but let’s be honest people find anything to be offended nowadays, I hope however that the point is understood as a matter that has nothing to do with denying a sexuality.

There’s a lot I want to say here so this is actually rather long. If it seems I’m pissed off it’s because hell yeah I’m pissed off about all this absurdity. So why do I think this is a horrible idea? and why do I say that this would effectively ruin Elsa?. Well let’s start with a clear fact, telling an artist to do something on their artwork because you want it is always a big no. Frozen is an artwork, as a movie, as a fiction story, no matter how commercial it is and that’s why we loved it on the first place. Fiction is one of the art forms that suffers the most  from letting the will of the author slip away, we can’t ask that for Frozen.

Frozen needs to keep it’s artistic integrity. No, I’m not saying that it would lose artistic integrity due “having gay people on it”, no, it would lose it’s artistic integrity by turning into a form of activism tool in order to pander a group that apparently doesn’t even care for it’s art root. The nature of the movie is in the storytelling, the craft of a world and characters that we love, not in the intention of portraying “a first something” to appease a group of people.

This way Frozen shouldn’t turn into a tool to serve an agenda, no matter how good the intentions of said agenda are. Frozen will be best by being “Frozen”, by being a medium to deliver a social project. And yes, right now Frozen, Elsa , LiG has become a symbol of liberation that has been used by the LGBT community as well as many others, and that’s great, it’s great Frozen helps people but that’s the nature of the story it doesn’t meant it was written and evolved specifically for that , it doesn’t mean the story was planned with the purpose of activism which is what is being asked now.

I do not believe on this whole representation deal. I respect that some do believe and want that but I consider it bullshit. My entire life I do not recall knowing any character physically, etc… “like me”  , for many reasons that I will not disclose, despite my love for fiction in all forms. That however did not stop me from relating to so many awesome characters that perhaps at first sight are nothing like me. I’ve related to blacks, whites, asians, latinos, a plethora of sexualities, females, robots even animals. That’s because we shouldn’t care about the fact that “they look like me” or “they like the same gender as I do”, no, a character is not great because of that stuff, and it’s silly to pretend that sharing such superficial trait should make it important to us. A character is great and we relate because of the characters motivations, actions, personality , values etc… I mean isn’t that why we’re fighting against discrimination on the first place? to see the entire world by those traits? then why is it that we’re fighting for more characters to be written superficially like us instead of demanding characters to be WELL written, period?.

I’d like to take the example of Chadwick Boseman. When asked how he felt playing a black superhero that black kids could look up to, he responded that it was great and all but he hoped that kids from all ethnicities could see themselves and learn from the character. That’s what we should aspire to.

Let’s be realistic here, the intention of Frozen creators was never to make Elsa “secretly gay” “under the nose of Disney”, do you really think the writers for this WDAS movie had that in mind at the hour of creating the character? before the premier Jen Lee even tweeted how good Elsa and Ralph would look together and an animator made a wedding for them. Frozen was also not meant to have a sequel at the beginning since WDAS doesn’t do sequels and Frozen was considered a Tangled-like success at best, leaving no room for a planned future development on that direction. So yes, Elsa appearing attracted to women on the sequel would indeed be “making her” or “turning her” into a lesbian. We all know, we all can guess and see that the intention behind of such action would not be purely artistic.

Elsa has an arc already that’s about self discovery and acceptance, it has touched all kinds of people beyond the LGBT side. Why would they limit her reach now?, why would they do basically repetition of such arc just to focus on the LGBT issues, Elsa’s arc already touches such problems so why is Frozen asked to be more specific?. Has everything that Elsa taught us and touched us with not enough?, was she never really this amazing character that represented self discovery and acceptance? were we lying and just seeing her singleness as a sign of being gay and as the best of her?. Yes the writers have said they want to touch today’s issues on Frozen 2, but they’ve already touched the issue of feeling and being different, are we really just asking them to be more specific because such lessons are only important when it’s about LGBT causes?.

Let’s also talk about the current story. The focus and the reason why so many fell in love with this movie is the familiar bond on it. The movie was meant to portray familiar love  rather than center around romance like oh so many stories before it, and Frozen nailed it. Now let’s not kid ourselves, as soon as Elsa tuns into a lesbian the focus changes, it’s no longer “the franchise that’s all about familiar love and what goes beyond just romance” to “the franchise that finally got gay people into disney/the disney franchise that talks about homosexuality”. And I ask why should this happen?, why something that is already beloved and that has touched so many people should turn into something else in favor of activism? how is that fair? both for the story and the fans of it.

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anonymous asked:

What your life been like recently ??

Thank you for asking! It’s been… complex. Amazing and also awful. I’m on holidays right now and I’m working on myself everyday, and I feel myself becoming more self-confident but I also have like loads of projects to do and somedays I wake up late and I feel really really unproductive and therefore I go into a cycle of hopelessness and its not good but I’m working on breaking this cycle. So far my new year has been amazing, thanks to a person :)) (@koalacha)

SAMANTHA MAURER

Samantha Maurer is a CalArts Character Animation student, a former Regular Show intern, and a roller derby league member who goes by Sailor Doom. What we’re trying to say is there is nothing this girl can’t do. 


Muse’s Milk: Tell us your story.

Samantha Maurer: I grew up in Northern California just inland of the Bay Area in a lil’ farm town. Since my town was super small and desolate I didn’t really have an opportunity to formally “do art” until high school. When I finally got into my first art class I had a super great art teacher who pushed me to try a lot of different things. I ended up driving to Oakland on the weekends to take figure drawing and oil painting classes at CCA. Eventually I changed high schools and attended an art program within a high school in Marin and did a semester away from that at a boarding school in Napa called Oxbow.

All of these opportunities let me explore different ways of thinking and creating and helped guide my art towards design and animation. Currently, I am a third year at CalArts in the Character Animation program.

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Mary McDonnell and James Duff REDDIT Chat

Hi Reddit! Mary McDonnell here!
I have been many women in many different times. I’m currently Captain Sharon Raydor on Major Crimes, was the president of the universe on Battlestar Galactica, and a hard headed Stands With a Fist out on the prairie (to name a few).
With Season 4 of Major Crimes now in its second half, I’m here with show creator James Duff to answer your questions! So…. ask us anything!

External image

Here I report the Reddit Chat Questions which were answered!

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ew.com
Lea Michele on Scream Queens: 'I think the killer is a girl': Interview | EW.com

ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: This is the opposite of Rachel. Is that the appeal?
LEA MICHELE: Honestly, having been offered this role, I knew nothing. But I did trust Ryan implicitly that he would create something for me that would be the most incredible opportunity to show people a different side and a different color. And the first and only thing he said to me about the project was, “Neck brace.” And I was like, “Well, I guess no better way to show people something completely different from Rachel Berry than a neck brace.”

The thing that I’m most grateful for with this character is the opportunity to show people a completely different side. I think that there is a definite issue with being a part of a show for seven years, being such an iconic character, then switching to something else. I can’t think of a better way to really show people a different side of me than to be playing Hester.

Hester gets a makeover in episode 3. Did you want a makeover? Were you like, “I can only do this neck brace for so long”?
I knew nothing about a makeover, but I will say that I knew Ryan Murphy very well and there’s nothing he loves more than a good makeover. But I will say the neck brace does come back.

I heard the neck brace returns!
It comes back. When I opened that script, I was like, “What? Excuse me?” But it plays an important role in its return, and you will see.

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Today, 01/04/2015, it was announced that Iikubo Haruna is going to graduate from Morning Musume.

Official statement from Iikubo Haruna:

Thank you for always supporting me and Morning Musume'15!

I, Iikubo Haruna, will be graduating Morning Musume'15 in the final day of our tour this summer. I apologize for the sudden announcement, in the past year I’ve been thinking a lot for what I am going to do after I stop being an idol to the point I decided I’ve accomplished all I wanted as an idol and I am ready to step further and open a new page in my life. My biggest passion, the fashion, is what I am going to go for after I graduate and hopefully I will become a well recognized model like Kusumi Koharu-san.

As for my activities in Morning Musume'15 and Hello! Project, I still have five months left, so please support me and the group with all of your heart!

01/04/2015

Iikubo Haruna

Official announcement.

02/16/2015, 11:17 am // AP biology and Duolingo have basically become daily fixtures in my life now! I love waking up in the morning, fixing up some coffee, and sipping it while practicing German.

In other news, I’m on a one-week-long break right now, courtesy of my school district’s weird schedule. I’m planning on getting in lots of AP prep, getting a long-term project done, and hopefully updating this blog more. And if I get done early, I might just reward myself with some animal crossing.

I'm taking a break from all of this.

I’m getting off this website for a bit. There are far too many things on this website that make me feel bitter about myself, and during a time where I’m trying my best to rebuild myself again and fall out of some bad habits, I think it’d do me well to not wrap myself up in other peoples success or problems. 

Recently, I’ve fallen back into doing some things that have been holding me back. I’ve only recently started to get myself back together and I can feel the results, even if it’s just an early stage. It feels like my old self, and I need to do what I can to give myself better peace of mind. 

For far too long I just scroll through this website, letting simple little things like notes get to my head. Even if they aren’t on a post I made, and you know what?

Fuck that. 

I’m sick of feeling troubled by other peoples lives. I’m sick of drawing assumptions that are never true, and then falling back onto substitutes to heal whatever pain or anxiety I’m feeling. Whenever I think about the bad feelings I get, or the trains of social and emotional anxiety I get, I can trace at least 60% of it to this place, or some other form of social media. 

You ever go out and hang out with people in person sometimes? Maybe even the friends you met on the internet, and you realize just how pointless most of the bullshit you hear on the internet is? Even among your friends or people you know? 

Trying to work on my own projects has just become a chore in light of others progress, making me feel like I’m not going fast enough, or making me feel completely irrelevant. But you know, life is a just a bit more important than that. I owe it to myself to just clear my mind of all of this, and gain some perspective that’ll help me deal with it better in the future. 

I’m not there right now, and I’m starting to work on getting there. 

I know this just sounds like another one of my bullshit personal weh I’m emotionally sick posts and that I’m going to be building up some whole new image or something, but you know, the only way to start something is to actually start.

There’s no point in saying, “Yea I’ll do this when I can." 

Just do it.

And I’m choosing to dissociate myself with this site right now. 

So I’m not gonna check this website or be on any real social media for a while. I’ve got myself to take care of, real life issues that need addressing, and an EP to work on. 

So this is the necessary next step to helping myself.

I’ll always be on skype if those of you who have it ever wants to reach out to me or have a talk, though I might not be entirely responsive. I’m trying to get a lot done now and it’s important that I do. 

Thanks for your understanding. 

For now, I’m out.

Take care. 

When I was really young, I told my Mom that I was going to go live in the Amazon in a treehouse, be a nudist and eat only rice and potatoes. I’m currently a *littttle* south of the Amazon, and I live above a laundry, not in a tree, but I did spend all day in a sarong, and I ate a lot of rice.

Later in my young life I thought that maybe I would be like Jane Goodall and work with primates or be a herpetologist. It’s not my job, but the shirt I wear the most has a gorilla on it, I watch a lot of animal videos, and I live with a lot of free roaming geckos. Plus, people are primates too, right? I study those. And some are even a little cold blooded.

In seventh grade my advanced placement classes required me to write and perform poetry, and I thought maybe I would grow up to be the poet laureate. Though I took a 7 year hiatus, I’ve now run a slam poetry organization, when I post on tumblr sometimes my poems get a few notes, and when I perform people snap a lot.

Eighth grade for my career project/life plan, while everyone else in advanced class laid out their plans to become engineers, doctors and lawyers, I laid out a plan to own a cafe that also was an art studio and tattoo parlor/barbershop/boutique. I still think that’s a good idea. I haven’t tattooed anyone yet, but I have a few, and I’m getting more, and I’ve been cutting and dying hair in kitchens for 10 years! One time, I had a restaurant with three ish walls for a couple of months. Though it was just a fancy shack, it was licensed! (Unlike my haircuts)

Later, I wanted to design and direct for the theatre. I’ve been involved in over 20 productions! I don’t work as much as my friends do, but I’m always down to volunteer my time for the arts. I still believe in the transformational power of performance arts, and feel as close to feeling as close to God as I ever have in a dimly lit theatre.

In early high school I wanted to be a polyglot. Tonight, I conducted a conversation (really broken, but productive) in three languages, with people from 6 ish countries of origin and discussed the finer points of grammar and idiomatic expression.

Sometimes your goals aren’t being achieved the way you think they will be, so you can’t see how much you’ve done. Sometimes you forget what is important to you, or what you want, or what is integral. But when you think about it, we’ve all come a really long way.