this probably didn't turn out how i wanted it to but i'm really upset so here take it for what it is i guess

anonymous asked:

Are you still taking prompts? If so, could you write some more of the Gallovich Queer Club thing you've been doing? Ian and Mickey with Mandy, Carl etc?

// yes I am totally taking prompts! and wow thanks for requesting something from that idea, not many people have read it :) let’s see where this goes… //

// NOTE: you don’t need to have read the previous fics I’ve written in this universe, they all work as oneshots :) //

Carl was holding Yevgeny as he waited for Ian to come back from his therapy session. ‘So does Ian just live here now?’ he asked Mickey.

He glanced across the sofa to Carl. ‘We haven’t really talked about it…but he wants to be here. And I like him being here,’ he said with a note of finality.

Carl nodded. ‘What are you going to tell Yev?’

Mickey couldn’t keep up with how quickly the kid’s mind jumped from question to question. ‘What are you talking about?’

‘As he gets older, he’s going to start asking questions. He’ll ask why Ian sleeps in your bedroom and why his mom and aunt are sleeping across the hall.’ He wasn’t speaking rudely, just curiously.

'Look it’s not as if I haven’t thought about that,’ Mickey began awkwardly. In truth Mickey had been thinking about it more and more since the day he first held his son. 'I don’t know, honestly, we’ll just figure things out as we go.’ He didn’t like talking about it.

'Does Ian want to be Yev’s dad?’

'I don’t know, ok? Jesus.’ Neither of them spoke for a moment. Mickey sighed. 'I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped like that. Sorry.’

Carl shrugged. ‘It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.’ But he didn’t ask any more questions after that. Thankfully Mandy walked in from her bedroom, just wearing panties and a t-shirt.

'Hey, is Ian not home yet?’

Mickey shook his head. ‘Doesn’t finish therapy until four. Shouldn’t be back for, like, forty minutes.’

'He left the house at one-thirty,’ Mandy said. 'He told me his session was at two. Mick where is he?

'He said was going back to his house for a couple hours. Said he wanted to see Fiona and Liam…why did he tell you his session was at two? Shit,’ he said, immediately standing up and heading for the door. 'Carl? Mandy?’

'Let me get some clothes on,’ Mandy dashed back to her room whilst Mickey put Yev in the stroller. She emerged a minute later with Svetlana.

'She told me,’ Svetlana said. 'I want to help find Ian.’

She and Mickey looked at each other silently for a moment. Then he nodded. ‘Ok. Thanks.’ They left.

-

They’d so far discovered that Ian hadn’t shown up for his appointment, and Carl had called Debbie and learned that he’d not been to the Gallagher’s either. It had been almost an hour. Mickey was starting to sweat nervously.

'I should’ve gone with him. I should’ve fucking gone with him!’ he muttered to himself, kicking an old beer bottle on the sidewalk.

'Don’t blame yourself,’ Mandy told him firmly. 'Let’s try the alibi, yeah?’

'Yeah, I have a shift in thirty minutes anyway,’ Svetlana said.

Mickey glanced at her. ‘You can blow it off if you want.’

She stared at him, taken aback. ‘Thank you. But we need the money.’ They all kept walking in silence, save for Yev’s light snoring.

'What can I get you?’ Kev yelled in greeting as they entered. He grinned, having not seen Mickey in a while.

'Looking for Ian,’ Mickey said.

'He’s not been here. Hey, how’s he doing?’ Kev asked, speaking more quietly now that they were at the bar.

'He’s missing,’ Carl told him.

'Shit. You check the hospitals? Emergency rooms?’

They all looked at each other. ‘We didn’t think of that,’ Mandy admitted. Mickey looked like he was going to throw up.

'It might not be that bad,’ Kev said hurriedly. 'Why don’t you try Boystown?’

'Why would he go there?’ Svetlana wondered.

'Why would he want to go there?’ Mickey murmured to himself, staring at his shoes.

'Ok I’m going to shut up and pour you a shot,’ Kev did so, lining up glasses for Mandy and Svetlana too. He tossed Carl a juicebox.

'Mick, we should probably head down there. It’s plausible,’ Mandy said.

He nodded. ‘Thanks Kev,’ he said.

'Yeah, hope you find him.’

Svetlana leaned down to lightly kiss Yevgeny, and then paused before hugging Mickey. It took a second before he hugged her back. It was brief but affectionate.

'Shit, you going straight again Mickey?’ Kermit yelled, laughing.

'Not fucking likely,’ Mandy spat at him as she wrapped her arms around Svetlana’s waist and kissed her, rough and hard. Carl grinned.

'Well that’s definitely bought in more business,’ said Kev amidst the wolf whistles from surrounding drinkers.

'Bye,’ Svetlana said to Mandy, grinning and licking her lips.

They headed out, the men in the bar shouting for Mandy to stay too. She just stuck up her finger as they left.

-

'So…this is Boystown?’ Carl said, looking around in wonder. 'Why have I never been here before?’

'Because it’s a fucking shithole,’ Mickey told him.

'Let’s just find Ian. And Carl, do not wander off anywhere,’ Mandy said, 'Can you push the stroller?’ She passed it over to him.

'Sure.’

They first went for the club where Ian worked. It was fairly dead inside, with it still being early.

'Hey!’ Mickey yelled at the manager, who was stood near the bar. 'You seen Ian? Ian Gallagher?’

'No. But if you see him, tell him he needs to come by and collect his tips from last weekend.’

Mickey frowned. ‘He’s not had a shift here for nearly a month. He said he called to take some time off. He’s - sick.’

'He was here on Saturday. Mixing drinks and dancing as usual. Stopped giving lap dances though. Shame. He was one of the best.’

Mickey didn’t say anything. He just turned around and walked out as fast as he could. He felt like his head was going to explode. Carl was first after him.

'Are you ok?’

'Why would he lie to me?’ Mickey said. He was furiously trying not to cry. 'When has he even had time to come down here? Why would he…is he sick of being around me?’

'The guy said he stopped giving lap dances. That’s proof that Ian isn’t sick of being around you.’

Mickey didn’t say anything for a second. ‘I’m pissed with him but mostly I’m fucking worried,’ he told Carl.

'Let’s take the L to the hospital?’ Carl suggested.

'Mick!’ Mandy’s voice came from behind them. 'This guy saw Ian.’

A fit man in black jeans walked beside her. ‘I just sold to him. About an hour ago,’ he said quietly, glancing around to make sure no-one else could hear.

'Fuck,’ Mickey sighed. 'So he’s lost and he’s high? What did he buy?’

'Uh, coke, E. And some weed.’

'Why would he do that?’ Mickey asked Mandy, his eyes wide and desperate.

'He didn’t say where he was going,’ the dealer added.

'Yeah you can fuck off. And don’t fucking sell to him again,’ Mickey said, and swiftly kneed him in the groin.

-

They were on their way to get the L, walking under the bridge, when he saw them.

'Hey!’ Ian’s voice. Mickey immediately spun around. Ian was slumped on the ground, leaning against part of the bridge. He ran over and crouched before him.

'Ian, what the fuck? What have you taken?’

Ian’s eyes were unfocused. ‘Ah…a little of this, little of that,’ he said unhelpfully.

Mickey took his hand. It was cold. Probably from sitting out here. ‘Ian…why?’

Ian shrugged, unable to meet his eyes. ‘I don’t know. I don’t know anymore,’ he whispered. ‘I just didn’t feel like therapy…it feels like I’m not making any progress…and I know that would upset you…so…I don’t know,’ he shrugged apologetically.

'No, Ian, not knowing where you are and finding out you’ve been snorting coke upsets me. Actually going to therapy, that’s progress. You have to talk to me if you’re worried, if you’re unhappy. Please…the fact you’ve been thinking these things in silence…Ian when I said I loved you I fucking meant it. I need you to tell me this stuff so I can help you. I am never going to be upset with you about something like that.’

'Sorry I couldn’t be honest,’ he said. He was crying now. 'I’m sorry Mick, I’m just so fucking scared because I can’t control anything in my head anymore. Some days I can’t see myself. And I’m terrified that one day you’re going to realise that you don’t know who you’re lying next to anymore. Because I sure as shit couldn’t tell you for certain. Every day it's…a mess. Every day, Mick,’ he sobbed, leaning into Mickey’s chest. Mickey held him.

'There is no way that I wouldn’t recognise the only man I’ve ever loved. The only man who taught me how to be free. And now I guess it’s my turn to help get you free. Mess? I know mess. Nothing will stop me from loving you. Nothing. We can and will get through anything. But you’ve gotta meet me halfway, where you can. Don’t just leave me ignorant back home while you’re out using this shit to cope. Please. Please, Ian.’

'Yeah, I’ll try to talk to you. I promise,’ Ian breathed Mickey in for a moment before reaching into his pockets. 'Can you take these? I - I don’t want to have them on me anymore. Just in case,’ he told him.

'Of course,’ Mickey said, pocketing it. 'Thank you.’

'I do love you too…I love you and that’s why I hate myself for all of this even more.’

'Don’t, Ian. Don’t hate yourself. Just don’t. You’re not worthy of hate. Trust me,’ he told him sincerely. Ian just looked at him and cried. And neither boy could really tell whether they were good tears or bad tears.

'Mickey please can we just go home?’

'Sure, yeah…your house isn’t far,’ he said, helping Ian stand.

'No,’ Ian gently tugged at his shirt. 'Our house. Our home.’

Mickey smiled in spite of everything and kissed him. ‘That’s home?’

'It’s where you are.’

And then Mickey was crying too.

'Well that answers my question,’ said Carl. They all looked at him, confused - but Mickey nodded and smiled at him slightly.

// the end. hope this was ok…please keep prompting me for fic-a-day-for-may! //