this post will restore your faith in humanity

Faith In Humanity Restored

I don’t post much on this blog that isn’t fanfic unless its reposted, but this one has been sitting in my mind.

I met a really sweet lady at work yesterday.
She was a cancer patient who had just finished chemo, and she said that your hair falls out very soon after starting chemo. She told me that the treatment center she went to had a whole wall full of handmade hats that people donated to the patients, but she soon learned that not many of them were very good. They were made with itchy yarn or the stitches would be too loose and not keep your head warm. She then began making her own, knowing what kind of materials and patterns a patient would need. She made some for the nurses and the general collection and she intends to make more to donate to the other patients.
I also get customers very often, usually older ladies, who are making quilts and blankets to donate to hospitals and nursing homes and churches.
I really want to do something like this. Make hats or scarves or something to donate. I just don’t know what to make or where it would go.

Okay so, story time!! Listen up little ones because I want to share this with the entire Spn fandom and family. This story will restore your faith in humanity, so please read this.

So for those of you who know and are aware, I’m a sickly person. Both mentally and physically. I had a rough childhood, bad family situation and all that. So in result, my medical bills are stacked to the roof. Late fees and interest, and because of my health I can barely manage a job to pay for anything. My depression has been getting really bad as of late, given my recent suicide attempts and (yes even more) hospital stays. I’ve been in a bad place. I didn’t know what to do with myself. I thought you know, no one cared. I wasn’t good for anything, I couldn’t even manage a basic job and because I am so young, i have no experience for anything so people would just walk right over me. 

Very recently I had a severe lapse. I was on the brink of suicide yet again. But this time was different. I was on my last option. I had nothing else left. And this was after the incident with Jared, when he fell. The fandom was right by his side in an instant. And they still are. They’re fighting for him even still today. Shortly after that happened, I fell. It was bad, I was really hurting. But this time I decided to do something about it, I decided to ask for help just like Jared did.

The response was overwhelming. hundreds of inbox messages within the hour. Love, support, encouragement, stories and so much more. People telling me to always keep fighting, don’t give up. Don’t let the demons win. I was happy. People actually cared. People helped me feel better even at my lowest point. The messages never stopped. I never knew so many people cared for my well being. 

In my plea I said something to the effect of not being able to continue fighting my battles without getting the chance to meet my heroes personally. (Jared Padalecki and Misha Collins). They’ve done so much to help me without even knowing my name. They’ve saved my life. Those two men are one of the main reasons I am typing this today. If I could do just that one thing, if I could just meet them, I could keep fighting until I grew old. I could stand for myself and try again. I could keep going. But there was no way that was going to happen. My medical bills were to prevent me from ever getting the chance to see them, in my entire life. Nothing made me feel worse than knowing that was an absolute fact.

Until now.

Shortly after I made my plea for help, I received a message on Tumblr from user michika0amaya. This person offered to buy me an entire weekend pass to the Supernatural convention in New Jersey, no questions asked, no catch. Only payment they asked for in return? To be happy and enjoy myself, and to send lots of pictures. That’s literally it.

Well at first I have to admit, I was skeptical. I didn’t want to get my hopes up only to be dragged down farther to the point of no return if it turned out to be a prank. I also didn’t want to burden my troubles on someone else. I honestly did not think it was fair. But this person did not take no for an answer and insisted that it was to be. So it happened. I actually have an entire weekend pass to go see Misha, Jared, Jensen and all of the other dorks that I love so much and have made such a positive impact in my life. I actually get this chance. This once in a life time opportunity from a stranger who didn’t even know me.

If you have never witnessed the love and power of the Spn Fandom and Family, I am here to tell you first hand that it is real. So very real and so very powerful. Thank you. I can’t say it enough. Thank you all for being here for me. Thank you for the love and support. Thank you for the words of encouragement. And thank you so much, michika0amaya for giving me the chance of a lifetime to see my heroes. To See Misha and Jared. even if it’s just for one weekend. It’s all I needed. 

Thank you

Alhumdulillah. I have no words. I thought we’d end up with around 20 or so cards from close friends. But we had an overwhelming flow of cards, packages, post cards and letters from all around the United States AND all around the globe. Just in this picture are 350 items, with still have more that we haven’t gotten the chance to open up yet. I would always see posts and other news stories about amazing things happening to other people, or what others will do for complete strangers. Today I can say, that I am witness to such a beautiful side of people. Some complete strangers have sent there most best wishes and love to my brother. There are those, whom I haven’t spoken to in years, whom have sent him something. Not to mention my beloved friends whom sent something without even telling me! I can truly say my faith in humanity is restored, yours should be too! He has had the best birthday, and this will probably the best for a lifetime! We will try together to get back to each one of you individually and thank you for giving us so much love!

some fun new things 2 try

1. stop exploiting disabled people for feel-good stories that “restore your faith in humanity.” we are not your props and we are not your crutches for when you’re feeling down. we’re human beings and we are not here to entertain you or lift you up.

2. stop taking pictures of disabled people and posting them without consent literally what the fuck is wrong with you

3. just leave us alone holy shit