My perfect day.
yo just for the record (more for the anons you're getting than you specifically), the whole op post is a joke in the first place. "4chan gold account" is an ancient 4chan joke, it doesn't actually exist. There is "4chan pass" now, which does allow posting on a member-only board (/vip/) but that didn't exist at the time of Dashcon (and isn't private or secret, since non-members still have read-only access). The whole thing is a joke. Don't worry, markimoo is safe!