What would a open mic night standup in ML Paris look like? Can you even fathom how hilarious that would be? Just a handful of comics cracking jokes about what traveling abroad is like.
Comedian: “The stereotypes against the french are just out of control now. Everyone expects me to be wearing a beret and eating snails and that’s not fair. But you know, you have to hand it to them, there is a pretty sure fire way to know if someone is french now even from a distance. Because if we see a butterfly we will freaking scream.”
I love the character specific ones, like Nino gets sorta well known in the comedy circuit when he’s a little older and he’s up there, smiling and interrupts his own jokes half the time with laughing, but his timing is impeccable.
Nino: “So, super villains.” *the crowd waits for him to say more, but he shrugs as if the sentence needs nothing else, and laughter picks up. He’s grinning before he ‘sobers up’.* “Bad news, obviously. Probably. But, I can’t be the only jaded guy out there right? Like, am I not the only one who hears ‘MONSTER!!!’ and asks without looking up from my phone like, ‘Well, where? Like here?’” *crowds starts laughing and Nino pantomimes texting. “’Cause like, if it’s not on this block man, I was gonna order in probably.’” *laughter continues. Nino waits for a second nodding and smiling. “Have I put a pizzaman through hell by ordering two large pizzas in the middle of a warzone?” *nods* “Yes. Yes i have. Those guys are the real heroes.” *crowd laughs and he chuckles, taking his own queue to get back on topic. He readjusts the mic stand, feigning apprehension.* “So yeah. Super villains, bad news. Some more than others, and like, don’t get me wrong! It’s bad, but, come one. Everyone is a little curious what their super villain is. JUST A LITTLE.” *he calls over the laughter of the crowd, making them laugh even harder. He holds up his free hand that isnt dedicated to the microphone like hes placating them.* “I’m not saying that’s cool! I’m saying that’s the way it is. Paris is a weird freaking place now, gotta take those changes in stride. And for some of us, we already know, right? Got any other akumas in the house? *he waits, listening for the three or four cheers from different parts of the room* “Respect! Alright, so I’ve got something to ask, now that we’ve got that out in the open.” *he pauses, gesturing a little and looking around, building the tension* “Be real with me… But, come on. Was anyone else just a little disappointed?” *the crowd freaking explodes. Nino waits and tries to start again but he starts laughing too, and eventually has to raise his voice to be heard over the crowd.* “I mean, come on! You’re already striping me of my free will, now I don’t even get to pretend in the back of my head that maybe I looked super cool? I mean listen, we’ve all had our moments but, please appreciate the fact that I now have to live with the fact that my ‘dark’ alter ego is a bubble wielding super clown. Really, Hawkmoth? I don’t even get that much?” *Nino lets the laughter ride out, shaking his head and pacing the stage, chuckling to himself. In a slightly quieter voice he says* “Paris is weird man.” *slight laughter* “It is, it really is. But I grew up here you know, I remember the ‘pre-butterfly douchebag days. How weird is it? For the people who move here? Like when they pack their bags, hop on a train, get all moved in then BOOM” *Nino makes a large explosion with his hands* “Huge explosion! Shakes the earth! Fire down the side streets, evil cackling in the air, and they are seized with terror only to realize” *he pauses, turning full circle on the stage before shrugging* “No one cares. Everyone looks up, sure, they’re checking where it’s at but the people of Paris have got the calm and orderly exit thing down, it’s been years we are used to it. We’re just like ‘Oh, wow thats a rather big one isn’t it? Huh, anyways-’ Yeah no one cares. Unless it’s Mister Pigeon.” *huge laugh, a few foreign looking people look confused and Nino chuckles* “For those of you with an intact survival instinct and dont live here, it’s worth explaining. That this city has, twice, been taken over by a mad, pigeon wielding bad guy. TWICE. This is some real shit. People respect pigeons now, I will pay you to find one native citizen who still has the balls to kick at a pigeon. ONE.”
and so on and so forth, with such famous bits as ‘Cat Noir makes a shitty roommate’ ‘Best Man at a superhero wedding doesnt really make you feel like the best man’ and ‘The Bubbler II: Return of the Super Clown (God Damnit)’