this one is kind of old anyway

Sun and Moon turned 1 today!! This is a kind of old thing from June which I never finished, but I touched it up a bit and think it looks all right as is.

I need to tell you guys about the time I was almost swept off to another dimension on a ghost train or something

Because honestly it was… a really weird experience tbh

So a few years ago a friend and I were in Belfast, and it was getting towards evening time in the winter so it was already pitch black but still kind of crowded from the Christmas rush. We headed to the train station to get a train home and these trains were fairly regular, like about every thirty minutes or so which is pretty regular for that country, trust me. The trains varied from the newer, nicer ones to the ones that probably hadn’t been updated since the seventies, but they were all relatively decent and no cause for concern. 

Or so we thought. We caught our train at the usual platform, but no sooner had we got on did we realise something was kind of off. This train was old, and kind of shabby looking. We made a few jokes and sat down anyway, figuring it was one of the older trains that we’d just never seen before, and things passed relatively normally. The train pulled out of the station, and it was only as we were picking up speed that we realised we were the only ones in the carriage. This was highly unusual, because it was still peak time for people starting to head back, and it being so close to Christmas, the train should have been packed. We couldn’t have got on an out of service trains, because they wouldn’t go to a passenger platform if they weren’t taking passengers, and with all the other trains needing platforms there would be no room for them. They would go to a separate part of the tracks out of the way. We were completely stumped.

We put it down to just weird timing and figured the other carriages probably had people in them, and tried to relax. The train was sort of rickety and unusually loud, and it didn’t exactly sound like what you would expect from a train. I don’t know how to describe it, but there was a kind of odd, distorted quality to the sound of the wheels on the track; it was sort of muffled but also louder than usual at the same time? Kind of like when you have a dream and wake up still hearing the sound from it, and it sounds both quiet because it’s fading from your ears but loud at the same time because it’s in your head. That’s really the only way I can describe it.

We quickly noticed something else that was weird. Several minutes passed, and we didn’t stop at the usual stop. We didn’t even go past it. Several more minutes passed and we absolutely should have stopped at at least two stops. There was nothing, and there was no train guard to check tickets, either. By now, we’re really freaked out. We’re passing through places we recognise, proving we’re on the right route, but we’re not going through any of the right stops and the train isn’t slowing. This probably went on for a good six or seven minutes, even though we should have been out of Belfast by that time. Finally, the train started to slow, and pulled into the first station it should have stopped at, only minutes after leaving the original station. By this point we’re so freaked out that we know we’re getting off the train, so we stand and go and wait by the doors.

The train stops, and the platform outside is empty – again, very unusual for this time. The doors thankfully open and me and my friend hurry out onto the platform, and almost immediately after our feet touch the platform, the train pulls away. No one else got off the train, and as it passes, we see there’s absolutely no one else on the train. No passengers, no guards. The driver would have been at the front so we didn’t get to see if anyone was there or not, but the train was completely empty. We watched it go along the track a short distance, and then the lights simply vanished even though there was nothing there to obstruct them. No trains on other tracks, no tunnels, no curves. That part of the track has great visibility, but the lights just vanished into midair.

We look at one another, and then suddenly we realise we can hear noise, and the platform behind us is packed with people. We just jumped on the next train with a crowd of other people and tried not to think too much about what would have happened if we’d stayed on that first train.

I imagine like, Bitty finding out that his paternal grandad (the biological one) is the head of this super wealthy and old money southern family. And hes dying and wants to connect with his estranged and outofwedlock son and his family. So Bitty’s invited to this fancy party and he’s feeling kind of uncomfortable until he sees Shitty and yells out loud, in the middle of a sea of American Old Money, “SHITTY!”

Anyway Coach’s side of the family makes him really uncomfortable (even if there were a few cool cousins and aunts) so Bitty doesnt like to interact with them a lot.

So I have a Thing to offer...

…that I believe the @space-australians and @humans-are-seriously-weird folks may be interested in.

Picture this, if you will: human member of a mostly alien crew enjoys drawing, enough that they brought a sketchbook or three into space with them. They enjoy sharing what they create with others, whether its just a simple sketch of another crewmember or a detailed rendition of that last really cool nebula their ship passed by. Now, some aliens get the concept of drawing like this, some don’t, but just about everyone can appreciate the level of skill and effort that went into rendering a near-perfect likeness of something by hand.

So then we come to a point when the human is encouraged into pulling out an older, already-filled sketchbook to show off other things they’ve done before becoming a member of the crew. As they flip through the pages, allowing various aliens gathered around to admire each one, they come to a sketch of a human riding a horse.

Someone of course asks what kind of animal it is, prompting the artist to explain a bit about the species, after which they add: “I don’t really want to finish this one until I get a good reference picture, since I haven’t seen a horse in a long while and I don’t think I quite got the proportions right…”

Even so, their fellow crewmembers say it is a very well-done drawing, the artist mumbles out a pleased thank-you, and on they continue.

A few pages later, there’s another human-riding-an-Earth-creature drawing. Except, this animal is much larger than a horse, and much scarier looking to boot, with curling horns, a mouth full of jagged teeth, claws on each foot, spines and scales and a dangerous looking mace-like tail - not to mention the fact that it’s flying on massive wings.

“What in the stars is that?!” Someone has to ask.

“Oh, it’s just a dragon,” the human says off-handedly. “I always liked drawing the European style best, since they’ve got the coolest features in my opinion - not that the Asian Lung and American Amphiteres aren’t cool too, though, and I’ll do the occasional African Wyvern or Fae Dragon, but for a portrait of a good old-fashioned dragonrider, I want the kind that started the tradition. Anyway, I really think you botany guys will like this next one, it’s a sketch of the apple grove I used to visit as a kid…”

The human doesn’t notice the silence of their audience, and eventually the aliens recover from their shock and dismay.

After all, that dragon was much more finely detailed than the horse, which leaves many of them with the impression that their human crewmate must have a much greater familiarity with such monsters…

unblazing  asked:

i rr like ur art and i was wonderin how you pick out your color schemes when you draw? like do u just kind of yolo it or do u have like a thing u do lol

thank u !!! actually i already tried to explain one way i pick colors here , tho thats pretty old and only refers to analogous color schemes so… im gonna try to update it a lil bit! (btw everything ill say from this point on is just based on my own experience, im no art student and im sry if anything i explain makes no sense….!! ANYWAY moving on)

1) probably the thing i use the most are analogous color schemes bc theyre easy to do and look very calm and harmonous:

the two colors i show on the color pick thing are the ones farthest to the left and right, every other color is somewhere between them! bc of this the drawing looks calm and natural. most of the different colors u can see are created by playing around with the saturation!

2a) something i only recently started using frequently is the analogous color scheme with a highlight:

the most part of the drawing is done in analogous colors, but i added a highlight to kinda of… “break open” the closed off feeling that analogous schemes usually have! for that highlight i tend to use a higher saturated color on the other side of the color wheel, or at least one that doesnt “match” the other colors.

2b) most of the time i do the highlight not like this tho, but in the lineart:

thats a lot more subtle !

3) and sometimes i just do…..whatever lmao

Muse’s First Halloween sentence starters

Starters for/to muses who have never heard of, or experienced, Halloween (the anon request was for non-human muses, but I feel this can be attributed to several situations.)

“It’s just a costume, don’t worry. We don’t actually shape-shift into monsters on Halloween night.”
“I’ve never heard of a holiday like this before.”
“There’s candy? I guess it can’t be that bad then.”
“I can’t believe you’ve never heard of Halloween before!”
“What kind of childhood did you have if you never ate Halloween candy?”
“Amazing. They shaped the peanut butter circle into a small pumpkin. How extraordinary.” 
“There are whole parties where everyone is dressed up like something else? How do you recognize anyone?”
“Uh, no, there aren’t any human sacrifices. They got rid of that a few centuries ago, I think.”
“You’ll love Halloween! It’s much better than Valentine’s Day, I promise.”
“Why do you have to kill the pumpkins? You put a face on them and then they rot. Isn’t that a bit cruel?”
“Is there any kind of brutal punishment if I don’t wear a costume?”
“So what deities are they praying to when they dress up like zombie nurses?”
“This is without a doubt the strangest holiday I have ever heard of.”
“There’s not usually a significance to the costume, no. Just whatever you want to be!”
“A whole holiday all about being scared and contacting the dead? Have you all gone mad?!”
“I’ve heard of holidays like this, but never experienced it.”
“It’s a good excuse to hang out in the cemetery and not look too suspicious.”
“No, we don’t just wear costumes or watch scary movies. We also egg peoples’ houses and throw toilet paper on their yard. We’re classy like that.”
“This is the only night you can contact the dead? Where I come from, we do that every day.”
“I think I like this holiday so far.”
“I’m not sure I like Halloween.”
“Don’t worry, Halloween is overrated anyway.”
“Costumes and candy are for babies. You and me? We’re going to raise the dead.”
“No, we don’t burn witches on Halloween. That’s so seventeenth century.”
“Black cats and pumpkins and stuff, it’s all just based on old superstitions and legends.”
“Tell me about the history of this holiday.”
“This isn’t one of those Santa Clause things, is it? I don’t want to know what kinds of presents he would bring.”
“Ugh! All of these costumes are hideous. And people dress like this for fun?”

Parent: What sound does a bunny make?

Child: Irumen Jungkook!

Parent: No.

Child: Chong Jojun Balsa!

Parent: Wrong, let’s try another one-

Child: Wait I got it this time.

Parent: Go on.

Child: The sound that a bunny makes is the sound of a 19/20 year old male making fun of his older brother for being too short.

Parent: No. Next one, what sound does a horse make?

Child: Hobi, Hobi, Hobi.

Parent: No.

Child: A horse makes a screaming sound from being too excited.

Parent: That’s still incorrect.

Child: I don’t like snakeu

Parent: Nope.

Child: Don’t touch my faceu.

Parent: No. Next question, how the sun is how many years old?

Child: 23, well 24 Korean age.

Parent: Where are you getting these from? Anyways, what kind of animal is a turtle.

Child: A turtle is an animal that sleeps all the time because he works hard, and he doesn’t like to do hard physical activity.

Parent: That’s slightly right. Now what sounds does a turtle make?

Child: Infires man!

Parent: No.

Child: ARMY!

Parent: Still wrong.

Child: J Hoooooope!

Parent: Stop. We’re moving on to the next one.

Child: Wait I’m not done yet.

Parent: ….

Child: A turtle makes the sound of a 23/24 year old man sending people to Hong Kong with his flexible tongue technology.

Parent: Why do you know that? Anyways next one: What sound does a koala make?

Child: Jeon Jungkook!

Parent: *sighs* Wrong.

Child: I was born in Busan first!

Parent: No.

Child: I’ve ate 2,130 more bowls of rice than you!

Parent: Can a Koala even eat rice? One more time and we’re moving on to the last three.

Child: A koala makes the sound of a 22 year old male being mad that his little brother and his elder brothers keeps making fun of his height.

Parent: Why are you like this? Alright next one. What sound does an alpaca make?

Child: An alpaca makes the sound of a 24/25 year old male going on and on about how handsome he is.

Parent: Still wrong. Next one, what sound does a lion makes?

Child: Turn up!

Parent: No.

Child: What’s poppin’

Parent: Still wrong.

Child: My name is V.

Parent: No. Last one, what sound does a monster makes when he catches you?

Child: My name is R.A.P Monster, not D.A.N.C.E Monster.

Parent: No.

Child: Jimin, you got no jams.

Parent: Leave.

Welp. We went to see Wonder Woman. I cried during the sad parts and some of the other parts. They were the same kind of tears I had on and off through Ghostbusters. Movies with strong women who are fully realized people who are allowed to be sexual but are not sexualized and can also kick ass just make me cry randomly. Though TBH I also cry in LotR when anyone picks up their sword and runs into battle screaming the name of their home. I didn’t even realize how ravenous I was for a female version of that.

jfc I had a dream they were interviewing all the Voltron cast in one room and they were kind of goofing off except Steven Yeun was being very quiet and eventually they were like “hey Steven what do you think about all this?” and he says completely deadpan “yes… I love all you young sitcom people” and they laugh and are like “Steven how old are you anyway?”

and there’s this pause and this incredibly unsettling closeup of his face and he looks directly into the camera and cocks his head and very slowly says “I am………. one year old” and I was so scared I woke up.

How to Write a Resume LIKE A BOSS

So you’re ready to assume some responsibility and apply for your first job (or your fifth job or your fiftieth job) and you want some tips on writing a good resume, huh? Well, are you are in luck because 1) I’ve edited and proofed so many resumes I could probably write one for each of my friends without their input and 2) I’ve actually taken some classes on this shit. So, basing this primarily on comments I’ve made while correcting someone else’s resume (and while looking at my own for reference), here are my tips on writing a resume.

Keep reading

2

So apparently I didn’t see the Sammy tweet that said that his hair used to be “a flowing cascade”. And so I started fooling around with this idea. Don’t know if I’ll stick with the one in the 2nd image, but after doodling a few of these, it’s the one I like the best. I dunno. I tried giving him a ponytail and it just ended up looking a little too silly.  I know a lot of folks kind of draw Sammy as kind of an older character (and he probably is), but after hearing the detail about his hair, I’m starting to wonder just how old Sammy was before everything started going downhill…Hmm.Meh. I probably made him look too young anyways. Oh well. >>;

Some bonus sketches

3

So since several ppl asked about this, I decided to post it anyway! >:3

One of my old unposted works. I didn’t post it bc I had mixed feelings about the result, but since it’s been a year since I made it, I’ve moved on~

7

Edit: now with PART TWO 

This is the most shamelessly **aesthetic** thing I’ve ever produced and I’m not sorry. Harry’s dramatic ass deserves it. 

Anyway did you know I occasionally write fics? This is based on an old one from ages ago that I’m actually still kind of proud of. This mess was like 99.99999% inspired by the Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice. Vamp Harry is like as if VCLouis and Lestat actually managed to biologically produce a child. Also that .000001% is all Kaname Kuran haaaaaa.

anonymous asked:

What are you talking about, Acchan? You're disappointing me :( Of course Hide is the puppetmaster in Tokyo Ghoul. He is Uta, after all. And Uta is the puppetmaster. He transcends everything. He's the oppressors, he's the oppressed. Uta is the birdcage itself.

LOL oh, but you’re misunderstanding me Anon :)) Obviously Uta is everyone, including Hide, but still, Uta is no puppetmaster, nor are all the characters that he impersonates. Uta is a troll and an observer, but even if he transcends everything, he’s not 100% responsible of everything that happened which is why he’s no puppetmaster. xDD

MORE SERIOUSLY THO Anon, about the “Uta is the birdcage itself” part of your joke, I’ve been wondering lately about how accurate this kind of statement might be (not in the literal sense obviously), because I’m wondering if the old OEK is not one of the Clowns, since Roma said:

I know that I wrote that crack theory about the old OEK being Noro but I’m not 100% convinced yet, mostly because Kaneki’s side is convinced that the previous OEK is still alive.

So anyway, my initial suspect about the OEK being one of the Clowns was Itori because…

amongst all the subjects that she was knowledgeable about (”the truth”, the hybrids, also her calling Roma “her protégée”), but recently I’ve been wondering about Uta as the OEK because…

because (a tattoo to cover that he had only one kakugan)

Because (the tattoos’ meaning??)

BECAUSE (skull symbolism fits)

BECAUSE 

AND

Finally…

…such an ideology would fit the figure of the OEK as we’ve seen with Kaneki who’s striving for coexistence.

((Here’s an imgur link to see all the pictures in HD))

SO ANON YOU SEE I DON’T KNOW FOR SURE BUT I’M ACTUALLY REALLY SUSPICIOUS OF UTA BEING THE PREVIOUS ONE EYED KING AND THUS BEING AT THE HEART OF THE CURRENT PLOT.

Of course this doesn’t make a lot of sense with the flashback in TG vol 12 that he told Kaneki about him and Yomo, but it’s Uta and he could have lied, or there is a way around the flashback and we just haven’t figured out what it is yet.


TL;DR the previous OEK seems to be the reason the birdcage was created so if Uta is the previous OEK then “Uta is the birdcage itself” isn’t a completely wrong statement in itself Anon. 

So you see that’s why I really like to prank people with Uta because I’m quite sure that he has a big role to play aaaand the fact that he’s currently my n°1 suspect for “who’s the previous OEK” isn’t helping. 

Thanks for passing by Anon and nice try with the joke-that-might-in-fact-not-be-one. :3 Have a nice day!

anonymous asked:

i want to see the sincerely three at hogwarts, just me? okay

I HAVE SEEN SOME FICS FOR THIS BUT CANT FIND THEM

but anyways:

EVAN HANSEN:
• a hufflepuff
• i have seen so many posts about him being a gryffindor but idk i see him more as a hufflepuff
• bc like the entire DEH musical is about him messing up lol whoops there i said it
• anyways
• Heidi is so fucking excited to send her baby boy to hogwarts. she used to tell him bed time stories about it when he was a kid
• Evan never really uses magic at home, unless it’s to feed his goldfish or water the plants
• when Heidi asks him about what class he’s most excited for, he just kind of shrugs
• tbh he is just glad that he will finally learn how to use his powers!!!
• heidi was definitely a gryffindor
• and his dad was a Ravenclaw
• so Evan is hella surprised when he gets sorted into hufflepuff
• he was just glad that he wasn’t sorted into Ravenclaw because he doesn’t want to be anything like his dad
• he sort of has this weird prejudgement fixed on Ravenclaw bc of his dad
• ANYWAYS he shares a room w some kid named Arnold Cunningham
• they are buddies but Evan just wishes he had a quieter roommate
• he never really goes to the school games or events. he mostly just sits in his room
• he has an owl named lucy
• and he writes so many letters to Heidi
• dumbledore loves him ((he’s still alive in his headcanon ok fight me)) because he sees so much potential in him
• he has his homework handed in on time every day
• never late to class
• and is always making sure that he never spills anything in potion making class


CONNOR MURPHY:
• the biggest fucking scandal at hogwarts since Harry Potter arrived
• Cynthia and Larry were both Gryffindors and high school sweethearts
• so when the Murphy kids arrived, everyone was hyped!!!!
• so Zoe goes up to the sorting hat and obviously she gets put into Gryffindor
• and then Connor goes up and he gets sorted into … U GUESSED IT FOLKS: slytherin
• that’s how he gets labeled as “freak” or “screw up”
• Connor doesn’t really care about magic. In fact, he only ever uses it for bad things
• or lighting up joints
• mostly for lighting his joints
• anyways
• there’s even a rumour going around that he might be the next he-who-shall-not-be-named
• Connor doesn’t have an owl
• instead, he has a cat named Gerald.
• Gerald is all black w green eyes
• he never sends letters
• he only ever has Gerald around to keep him company
• Connor is surprisingly good at school
• him and snape ((still at hogwarts in this au fight me bitches)) become really close. they just kind of get each other, you know?
• him and zoe grow apart because of how different they are
• it’s sad
• but Connor makes a few friends in his new house
• but sometimes he sits in the corridors and talks to the ghosts on the walls
• (((((au where he has a crush on one of them))))))
• he is hella content


JARED KLEINMAN:
• a fucking Ravenclaw fight me
• there is no doubt
• both of his parents were, and they gave him their old robes and scarves so that way he wouldn’t spend all his money on Ravenclaw merchandise
• anyways
• jared is the cool kid
• everyone thinks he’s hilarious and the teachers hate him for it lol
• he purposely messes up spells in class to make everyone laugh
• refuses to ride a broom
• “it’s part of your grade, Mr.Kleinman. You are required to do it”
• “my fat ass will break it”
• cue the laughter from his classmates
• his diet consists of: mashed potatoes and chocolate frogs
• never ever does his homework but somehow manages to make honour-roll???
• can and will ditch class to find some goddman mythical creatures in the forest
• is chill with everyone
• “yo, McGonogall, what’s the haps?”

Hello and welcome to hell—I mean the Halloween AU because I mentioned vampires for Halloween and there are entirely not enough vampires in my fic.

Tiny!Steve runs a supernatural diner. He’s not a supernatural creature himself, but he finds that his asthma and other ailments are… eased when he’s around the supernatural. And he’s always loved a good, greasy burger, so why wouldn’t a ghoul or a goblin? Not to mention that he’s tired of every diner he and Bucky go to throwing them out after pointing to a ‘no supers allowed’ sign. And it works out for him in a big way; the supernatural creatures of Brooklyn love diner food. He has enough profit to start hiring people to help him work the grill and Bucky serve the customers within the first two weeks, and he definitely needs the help with all these hungry supernatural creatures ordering his lamb burgers and onion rings.

Of course, out of all the supernatural creatures that show up, they never really expect a vampire. Steve only realizes that something is amiss when the diner slowly falls silent. He peeks out into the dining room to see that everyone is staring out the window, hushed, and even Bucky looks spooked. Then apparently the vampire leaves because everyone slowly relaxes and conversation starts buzzing again. He asks Bucky about it later, and the werewolf looks kind of confused, as if he doesn’t quite know how to explain. “Vampires are solitary,” he finally explains. “Most of ‘em, anyway. Some have nests, but the older ones… don’t like each other.” “So the vampire was old?” Steve asks curiously. Bucky stares at the wall pensively. “Felt like it,” he finally answers after some thought.

The vampire comes by several times and makes the diner hush, but they never actually come inside. Steve can only take so much. He doesn’t like his loyal customers being terrified every night. It’s bad for digestion. Also Steve has never backed down from a fight in his life and he’s not going to start now especially if Bucky’s gonna be a BIG FUCKIN’ PANSY and hide inside with everyone else. (“Legit how has nothing eaten this kid yet,” a specter asks Bucky, and Bucky shrugs because honestly it beats him how Steve is still in one piece in general when he wants to fight everything and their mother.)

Steve zeros in on the vampire because there’s literally no one else outside. “What do you want?!” he snaps, and the vampire stops talking to itself, flinching, before turning toward him. “What do you mean?” “I mean you keep showing up, scaring my customers, and leaving,” Steve explains angrily, because how doesn’t this vampire know? “Do you do it for kicks? I just want you to know that if you say yes I’m morally obligated to kick your fucking ass.” The vampire squirms uncomfortably before stepping into the light from the diner. He’s very handsome but that’s not going to stop Steve from punching him in his stupid face. “I was just checking if you’d changed the sign,” he explains miserably.

Steve actually pauses. What. What does that even mean. “If I changed the sign,” he repeats slowly. The vampire motions at the blinking neon OPEN sign, looking defeated. “I just—everyone says you’ve got the best food and you’re supernatural-friendly, so I thought—but I guess you don’t allow vampires. But that’s okay,” he adds hurriedly when Steve’s mouth drops open. “I wouldn’t want to—ruin the atmosphere of your diner. I’ll just go.” “But I’m not,” Steve begins, but finds he’s talking to thin air. “…That would be discrimination,” Steve finishes quietly, shoulders hunching a little.

“Oh,” Bucky says when Steve tells him what happened. “Shit.” “Oh shit what?” Steve asks sharply, because he doesn’t want to ever be accused of discriminating against any creature that just wants a goddamn burger again. “You have to—they need to be welcomed,” Bucky explains. “They can’t enter a place unless they’re invited inside.” “THAT’S IT,” Steve exclaims angrily. “He’s been creeping because I don’t have a fucking welcome mat?!” “Hey,” Bucky snaps in response. “He didn’t ask to be like that, Steve.” Steve wilts. That’s right. No supernatural creature asked to have quirks that made their lives harder.

Steve purchases a little cardboard sign that says ‘Welcome! We’re open!’ with a little smiley face on it to put in the door even though it’s probably too late. He honestly feels a little terrible. The poor guy just wanted a burger and he couldn’t even come inside to get one. No matter how old and dangerous he was, he should have been welcomed inside. No one ever said anything about Bucky, or Natasha, or Bruce, and they were all plenty dangerous. It’s not like the vampire could bejewel everyone in the diner. No vampire was that powerful. “It’s called beguiling or compulsion, Steve,” Bucky deadpans. “Don’t call it bejeweling in front of a vampire. I won’t save you when they rip your head off.” Steve knows Bucky would step in and he seriously considers calling it bejeweling to the next vampire he meets.

A terrified hush falls over the dining room a few weeks later and Steve peeks out of the kitchen. The vampire has come into the diner. Everyone looks terrified, even Bucky. But the vampire pays them no mind, peering around the diner for an empty booth and, not finding one, instead moving to sit at the bar. The harpies on a date skitter to the opposite side of the bar from him in terror, but the vampire doesn’t look at them, instead perusing the little menu card Steve keeps at each bar stool. No one is moving to serve him. Steve pauses a moment to think about how useless supernatural creatures are before he comes out of the kitchen and grabs the pad from his apron. “Hi! What can I getcha?”

The vampire doesn’t speak for a long time, and Steve considers repeating himself, but it doesn’t seem like he’s being willfully ignored. Still, it’s annoying to wait. “…A cheeseburger,” the vampire says slowly. “Beef, turkey, lamb, or veggie?” Steve answers immediately. The vampire drags his eyes up from the menu, frowning, and the hair on the back of Steve’s neck stands on end, having to meet eyes older than him—perhaps older than his parents and grandparents. “…Beef,” the vampire answers. “As pink as you can make it.” “Alright,” Steve replies. “Swiss, cheddar, pepper jack, American, or provolone?” The vampire says nothing, thinking. Steve fears that he’ll be there until they open the next day. He hasn’t even asked the vampire about sides or a drink yet.

The vampire eats as slowly as he orders. The late night crowd has thinned out and Steve’s pretty sure it’s not just because of the vampire sitting at the counter making things tense—it’s getting very near closing time. “Is it rude to tell him he needs to leave when we close?” Steve whispers to Bucky. Bucky opens his mouth, but it’s the vampire who answers, “I’ll be finished by then,” making them both jump and yelp. Still, he doesn’t hurry, and Steve is sincerely beginning to doubt the vampire’s word as they clean up around him. However, as they finish mopping up, the vampire hands over his empty plate. There isn’t even any ketchup on it. “What,” Steve says, but when he looks up the vampire is already halfway out the door, and he’s left a crisp hundred dollar bill on the counter.

They don’t see the vampire again for a month. Steve remembers his order because it had taken so fucking long to decide on it, so he hopefully says, “A beef patty with cheddar, waffle fries, and a strawberry milkshake?” The vampire looks down at the menu, lips pursed. “…Not tonight.” Steve nearly weeps and hopes that Clint will pull the fucking fries so they don’t burn this time. Again, Tony eats like a fucking tortoise, hands over a gleaming-clean plate just before closing, and leaves a crisp hundred dollar bill on the counter while Steve and Bucky stare at this fucking plate they watched him pour ketchup onto the plate for his home-cut fries.

Eventually, the vampire comes enough that the diner stops going silent when he arrives. Still, everyone nearly faints when a young swamp monster running up and down the length of the diner bashes into the vampire’s leg and flops backward onto their diapered-butt. The mother swamp monster actually prepares herself to die protecting her child. But the vampire just squats in front of the sniffling tot, pats them on the head. “There, there. You’re alright. Sorry my stupid leg got in your way.” The swamp monster giggles reluctantly and wipes their eyes. “Maybe you shouldn’t run without looking where you’re going though. You might hurt someone. I can tell you’re going to be big and strong, so you’ll have to be more careful.” The swamp monster nods, grinning a gummy smile. “If your mother’s alright with it, would you like to join me for a scoop of ice-cream?” The tot’s head whips around, and their mother looks mightily concerned, but she also doesn’t want to insult a vampire, so she nods.

The young swamp monster finishes their scoop of chocolate and helps the vampire finish his scoop of vanilla, babbling all the while in swamp monster speak. Typically only other swamp monsters understood, but the vampire nodded along seriously and asked questions that the tot continued to answer. The vampire was probably much older than anyone had previously thought if he could understand the nuances of swamp monster speech. “Creepy,” Bucky mutters after they’ve gone to bed. “It’s creepy. Something so old shouldn’t exist.” “Don’t be rude,” Steve slurs into his chest. “He could have killed that kid and he didn’t.” “Oh boy, the bare minimum of decency.” “You thought he was going to kill you because you turn into a giant wolf on the full moon.” Bucky sighs.

Everything’s fine until one night the vampire arrives, eyes red, blood dripping from the corner of his mouth, staining his mussed-up shirt. The diner goes silent and cold as he walks toward the bar, and he lifts his hand to wipe his mouth idly as he looks at the menu. “…Can I just have a glass of milk?” The fuck you can, Steve wants to say, but wordlessly gets him his drink. Tony drinks it in three long gulps, sets the glass down, and leaves as quickly as he’d come.

There’s a crisp one hundred dollar bill next to the glass.

Ship of the Dead thoughts

- Blitzstone poke wars from first appearence

- TJ’s back story HOLY SHIT you’re amazing

- Why can magnus understand animals now and how in helheim is that connected to Alderman

- Blitzstone “conveniently ignored” side quest answers pls

- tf odin, none of this had to happen YOU HAD A RESERVE SUPPLY

- Does Loki’s wife stay with him????

- Blitzstone side quest pls

- Inge??????

- Fierrochase ending yasss it was in character and not forced 👌👌👌👌

- Alex “oh whoops I better just kiss you again to help me make my decision” Fierro

- Magnus and Alex kissing twice ONCE IN EACH GENDER Wooooo

- Blitzstone cute moments

- Inseparable Blitzstone

- But y u no give confirmation huh??

- THE CHASE SPACE

- Also Magnus is still giving Hunding chocolate 👌👌

- Generally more floor 19 back story yay

- But there was less Blitzstone no not good

- Samir, so pure, so wholesome

- RAMADAN YESS LET ME TELL YOU THAT IS SOME GOOD SHIT

- ALSO THE ALLAHU AKBAR EXPLANATION TY RICK FOR BEING SO KIND AND UNDERSTANDING THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT ISSUE

- But blitzstone pls

- They were so cute but pls

- You know what I’m talking about

- Also “Mallory might have a slight crush on Blitz” why?? 😂😂😂😂😂

- Tbh I think it’s just her being exasperated about Halfborn, I really don’t think that’s a thing

- Love the Magnus/Alex/TJ dynamic

- Alex back story 👌👌👌

- Mallory back story 👌👌👌

- Halfborn back story and so proud of his smol town 👌👌👌

- TJ still wins the back story prize though

- The flyting. So good. I swear magnus could have done that without the mead though bc he’s so pure

- I might have cried in the flyting

- Also at Hearth’s “thank you”

- you know the one I mean

- Andiron resolution. Emotional but not as much as it could have been idk? Maybe just bc I’ve overthought the whole thing tbh

- It was still emotional though

- Andiron is the purest character

- I want to hug him

- Alderman is a dick

- but dOES LOKI’S WIFE STAY

- I need answers

- And Blitzstone resolving the Inge problem with kindness

- Also, they’ve taken one old mansion from a dead relative and turned it into a positive, happy space so why not do the same to another?

- Turn the Aldermansion into a hulder sanctuary, or a place for rejected elves or sth

This post had got long but feel free to add to it anyway xD

"valenTEAna" astrolotea on the ru-onion

So like, vitriolina is genuinely mean, the worst of taureans and geminis combined, a sadistic combination for the appearance of ~congeniality~ and a tight leash for shutting those down who dare come for that.

As a Taurus sun, Gemini Moon like myself I understand shutting down and goin into shock before having to do an important ass thing or presentation, and also wanting to be home, but it’s also never a damn excuse!!!!!! Like, when ya friend is reaching out, and ya don’t wanna talk, at least offer that explanation????

I am SO glad it was the earth Signs who clocked her. Aja, Capricorn with a libra moon, saw unjust, and delivered her!!

And I am glad miss Virgo Farrah Cancer Moon, assisted by her sentient wig, pulled out those fuckin receipts on Valentina. That’s real Gemini moon of Val to be dismissive like… which sucks? Because it was also Gemini moon as hell to see her give Farrah that pep talk before she had to lip sync on the show. (What’s the truth)

“Can’t navigate” social media my ass, Shea’s psychic Pisces moon saw those lies??? “Can’t navigate” social media with a GEMINI MOON, THE MOST SOCIAL BUTTERFLY OF SIGNS. Okay yeah, NEXT.

And then JUST now addressing shit on Instagram trying to do some crowd control, but not when ya libra sis is callin you in tears, or when your cancer sis has to go private on IG, I see you sis. I’m a Taurus sun Gemini moon too and I know what we’re capable of. The worst kind of mean is the one that doesn’t admit it. It’s toxic.

Anyway, Shea or Peppermint deserve to win. Period. The. End. (Somebody get me peppermint’s birthday please).

p.s. Astrology is real, and I’m so glad that old hag of a Scorpio RuPaul let everyone expose Valentina on Television. That was a lesson she needed to learn.