✨✨CRAZY ASS STORY TIME✨✨
Seriously this tale is insane 😅😅👑👑
So I was shopping and I decided to drop by Lush to see if I could nick anything. This SA was friendly and talkative (as always) and kept following me around as I browsed. I really wanted to lift some of those recyclable pots so that I could get a free face mask when I was done. But there were SAs congregated so I didn’t have a blind spot.
Then I decided to look at the shampoo to see if I wanted any and maybe put some in my bag if I got the opportunity. As I was standing there debating if I could get away with it, the SA comes up and starts asking me what I’m looking for in a shampoo, conditioner, what I like about my own, etc. I’m starting to feel sick to my stomach and I think it’s guilt because I’ve had that once before, so I try to leave the conversation but the SA keeps talking. Suddenly I realize that I really don’t feel good and I put down the container I’m holding and the SA is offering to get me a sample.
Next thing I know I’m waking up and looking up from the ground at the faces of two SAs and one of them is saying “Call 911!” I’ve got my head in the lap of one SA and the other runs to get me some water and I’m like oh fuck. So I try to tell them I’m fine, I faint often, no biggie, I’m sitting on the floor of Lush surrounded by broken soap, and telling them I don’t need an EMT. Then like four security guards come in because they were called and I start panicking because at this point I have about $120 of stolen stuff in my bags on the floor next to me. They all are asking me if I’m okay, I say I’m fine and try to leave and they’re like “At least stay until the paramedics get here to look you over,” I really don’t want to because I know I’m fine and I don’t want to stick around security with a bunch of lifted shit any longer than I have to. I feel terrible about ditching the Lush SAs who were so kind and worried and the security guards but I gtfo of there and basically high tail it out of that mall.
Then my girls I went to a different mall and proceeded to steal ~$200 more stuff.
Anyway, that’s my story about the time I was questioned by four security guards and two SAs while carrying stolen goods and it didn’t even have anything to do about being sussed 😂😂😂🍰🍰🍰👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽