this lighting was so good i felt heavenly

One Condition [Part 2/2]

Yu:Why the hell… I don’t know, I was bedridden and bored and still need to add 30s slang to the other fic, but can’t do that until either I find my reference site or this damn Baccano episode loads up, so plz enjoy…

_ _ _

_ _ _

If you thought GuanShan didn’t noticed that he hadn’t woken up feeling this good in a very long while, then you were damn mistaken. Which was the first hint that something was wrong.

It’s kind of sad he doubted himself, his surroundings, his luck whenever he felt good; as if a tidal wave of ‘bad’ was about to crash him against the jagged rocks of reality.

After his eyes readjusted to the light, and the expensive sheets and heavenly pillows, and the sofa across from him, and the high-rise ceiling, he knew exactly what that incoming tsunami was.

“Morning, sleepy-head,” said the tidal wave.

A muffled ‘Nooo,’ was groaned faced down into the pillow.

Maybe if he pressed hard enough to the point of flattening his nose, he could smother himself.

But the onslaught wave had no interest in his deliberations, and strode from the kitchen to hand him a glass of water and pills he assumed were for hangovers.

“So let me try filling you in, in case you aren’t aware,” HeTian spoke, taking a seat on the adjacent couch. “Yes, you did arrive drunk on my doorstep at around midnight,” he folded his legs casually, “Yes, you did a bit of drunk rambling- but nothing embarrassing,” He winked. Prick. “And yes, you also passed out in my bed. Which wouldn’t have been so bad if it weren’t for you being in the smack middle of it, and having a tendency to kick sheets off of you, then hog them back on to your side, right before kicking them off again.” Wait. Had he slept in the same bed with him? He looked at the medium length of the sofa and knew the flat well enough to gather that the bed was the only comfortable place for the night.

“Sorry to inconvenience you,” GuanShan reluctantly mumbled, hating being formal with the bastard, but there was no doubt he was in the wrong.

“On the contrary. I told you that you needn’t try to deal with everything on your own. It’s okay for you to ask for help and that’s exactly what you did.”

“..什么?” GuanShan didn’t understand.

“Only thing to deal with now is how you’d like this done,” HeTian spoke with a definite change in his voice. The words would seem neutral and perhaps business-like, but GuanShan detected a certain chill reminiscent of the time the dark eyed boy promised steel wires and blood-dripped lips.
GuanShan kept silent, not sure when he had sat up with his legs hanging off the side of the bed.

“Your father, GuanShan,” HeTian alluded to his unasked question, “Do you want him dead or alive?”

GuanShan wondered if it’d be overdramatic to say that the world stopped. If anyone thought so, then how many people have offered before to commit murder for them?

GuanShan sputtered, but nothing coherent ever came out. It was as if he was just buying time while he tried figuring out what the hell was going on.

“What all did you hear last night? I was only looking for a place to crash-”

“There was a condition to you staying here. You had to tell me what was wrong or I’d throw you out… He’s back, right?”

GuanShan wasn’t good at hiding tells, but he at least knew what was one. So when his breath hitched at the question, there was no denying HeTian had the confirmation he’d been looking for.

“Shan… He’s back from prison. And as much as people would like to claim they’re ‘correctional facilities'…9 out of 10 they are most certainly not. If he’s beating the crap out of you and your mom, there’s only one solution to that.”

“Killing him!?”

“Showing him what the hierarchy is now that he’s outside a prison. If his dumbass gets killed and winds up in a backalley, that’s his fault. And if done right, no one will waste the manpower investigating it.”

There was hesitation. But he really had to know.
“HeTian… Are you a part of a gang?”

“Ha~…No, GuanShan. I’m not.” And he believed him.

“But,“ he paused, "to kill someone -”

“Doesn’t take being a Tong or a Triad.”


“Besides, I’ve seen his criminal records. Your father’s ties to either organization weren’t even that deep to begin with. He won’t be missed.”

The redhead wasn’t entirely sure how to covertly ask ‘Why the fuck do you know that?’, so he didn’t.

“No,” was the first word that practically forced its way out, “No. No, no, no,” Bringing his hands to his face, GuanShan shook his head, “There’s no reason to kill him. If I could just put him back in prison, that’d be-” “Done.”

His head popped up. Eyes wide in shock…fear…admiration?


“He’ll be back in prison by the end of the week. Stay here for now, and try to get your mother to come here as well. Tell her to say she’s heading to the market for groceries-”

“That’s doing too much-”

“Your business is my business.”

The statement was said with so much finality, GuanShan didn’t think he could help the first thing that shot out his mouth:

“Do you like me?”

It sounded like the most random of questions. Maybe even a bit needy too. What is this, primary school??
But in the context, with the housekeeping job, and the kiss, and the clearing of his name, and this, it just seemed-


His innerself watched in confusion at his heart plummeting from a drop door in his chest, until it shattered upon the metaphysical floor.


He shouldn’t be so blunt.

But then again, shouldn’t he be feeling relieved?

It’s just because the prick was being rude.

But he’s always like that. And honestly, he was just being clear.

Which is all he could’ve asked for.

But they had kissed, so how could HeTian say that??

Was it a game?
Did it matter?
Wouldn’t it be better if it was a joke?
Wouldn’t it be better if-

“I don’t know how I feel about you, actually,” HeTian’s words cutting through GuanShan’s high-speed train of thought that was tumbling off a broken bridge Old Western-style. “I just…saw a tool of amusement at first-” GuanShan almost interrupted, “-and after a little while, I saw only a friend, who was a bit of a pain in the ass, but worth it.

GuanShan felt a bit better, but it went away as soon as he saw the expression of an internal struggle, and words starting again with treaded caution.
“And I thought that this would continue… Until I saw,” HeTian paused, his eyes looking directly into his own, “a possibility.

Realization hit him like thunder, but lightning always comes first, and so before he could fully pass the sofa and reach the exit, HeTian’s reflexes had captured his arm. Every muscle rigid in his body, completed with a clenched jaw, and his eyes never deviating from the door leading outside of the Hell he’s found himself in.

“Shan - listen - that time - the kiss - it - it was just a joke, I swear. I’m not trying to push you outside of your comfort zone. I already know you don’t like me, and that’s fine,” he emphasized.


“But that doesn’t change the fact that I care about your well-being, because above all, you’re my friend.”


“Do you understand?”

Not at all.

HeTian’s words were crystal clear, but whatever the fuck was going on in his head wasn’t.

“You… I….” were the words that wound up beating the other stream of thoughts that had raced to his lips.

“It’s not…like that. I think that I just need time, is all…”

His eyes caught the sudden expansion of HeTian’s chest, and felt that this might be the closest he’d get to an audible gasp.

It was such a human thing, and he amusedly hadn’t thought HeTian capable until now. But that wasn’t the only surprise. GuanShan thought to himself of how all the times the person before him had smirked mischievously, or forced grins masking threats, but he had forgotten that genuine smiles may look a bit different.
For example, they tend to stretch the mouth at both corners, and raise the cheeks. There are sometimes wrinkling around the eyes. And even the darkest of irises had the potential of lighting up like the Chinese New Year.

HeTian’s chest finally drew inward, and his lungs exhaled, “Take all the time you need, GuanShan.”

There was evident emotion there. Hope.
GuanShan, for once, allowed himself to feel it too. Maybe this time a tidal wave wouldn’t come. Maybe this time, there’d be smooth sails.

_ _ _

Yu: 什么/shénme is just “what” (Probably coulda guessed that one, right?)


Prompt: I was kind of trying to think about a good songfic and then it hit me. Cure by Barcelona. And to give you some plot to go with the song… It could be the night after Pride arrests Hamilton. He’s exhausted and drained, but also a little restless. The reader wants to help relieve some of Pride’s stress. Smut COULD be involved, but if you don’t want to that’s also fine. ❤ much love to you! 

Requester: imthehoneyyourethebee

Words: 974

Warnings: None

You’re afraid
I’m a bad guy
All I do is hurt
So take away all my sin
Give me a sweet prayer on my lips

Pride was exhausted.

The weight of today’s events hung on his bones like a weight on the end of a fishing line. He felt dragged under the water, waiting for a fish to come along and finish the job.

Keep reading

Ἀκέφαλος - A Headless Rite Experience

Ok, take this with a grain of salt. Writing about a magical experience can seem like insanity. I have reread my magic diary notes, tried to gather my thoughts and form some type of thesis.

Over a year ago my life had become rather chaotic, frustrating and uncertain. Family and work life had drastically changed and no conventional ideas seemed to improve matters. At my wits end I began looking for “magical” solutions to break out of the rut. I don’t remember exactly how but I came across Gordon White’s Rune Soup blog. This discovery thrust me back into something I had spent the last decade trying to ignore and that was practical magic. Feeling very curious I purchased The Chaos Protocols by Gordon and was inspired to give the Headless Rite a go. However please note, my ritual is not as prescribed by Gordon, I’ll explain why later.

It was performed during the day on a Sunday on the planetary hour of the Sun in my backyard. The choice of day was not in my control, as it was the only day I could have my place to myself. But I did choose to perform it in the hour of the Sun to take advantage of the various Sun correspondences.

I began with a meditation to relax and enter a light trance state. I lit white candles located at the four directions as well as frankincense resin. Cast a circle by walking incense around a central altar (it’s just a small table). Read out barbarous names printed on paper, held to my left and right temples facing North. Then facing West towards Orion (who was below the horizon at the time) I read out the Headless Rite. I’m Greek Australian, so I read the rite in the Ancient Greek and not the translation. I don’t think the language used matters as long as the barbarous names are unchanged (that’s possibly where some of the magic is). I then activated some sigils using Gordon’s method of staring at sigils until they flash/fade and go back to normal. Then more meditation to cleared my mind. I ended the ritual and banished by clapping my hands and laughing. Tidied up the backyard.

Considerations and observations
Gordon suggests combining an invocation to the Demon Kings. I didn’t, mainly out of fear to be honest. Calling a demon back then felt sacrilegious and conflicted with my Greek Orthodox upbringing. It technically still does, but I’ve subsequently expanded my beliefs/views… not very Orthodox any more.

I don’t feel that the Demon Kings are demons anyway, well not in the biblical fallen angel style. I now view them as very significant spirits who represent/influence the cardinal directions, similarly to the Ancient Greek Anemoi (winds) and the Chinese Heavenly Kings. They are not a part of the Headless Rite, so their omission didn’t break anything.

The incense that was happily puffing smoke did flare up doing the ceremony, which did get the heart racing. The self lighting charcoals can do this which is normal. However I do find it amusing that it tends to happen as an accent or during the climax of a ritual.

I do remember feeling very invigorated once I completed the entire ritual. I didn’t think it was successful, but I felt good.

Then the fun started.

As crazy as it sounds I believe that performing the Rite opened me up to contact from the spirit world. The contact I received however was not what I expected, surprise surprise. My dreams three days later felt very, very real. I can lucid dream, but the feeling was far more intense. The first dream was a blend of nightmare and lesson. I won’t describe the entire dream, but basically I was given a lesson, I can either continue wasting life/vitality/energy by being sucked into base desires or I could channel my vitality/energy into meaningful magic. This choice was emphasised by two menacing black hounds with glowing green eyes giving me very threatening looks and growls. Oddly I felt a compulsion to give thanks for the dream after I woke up.

The hounds returned on two more nights. But on the last night within the dream, after I crossed a large canyon the angry black hound split into two dogs. One old, calm and friendly, the other young and active. I had worked through a few personal things so I felt the hounds were happy with me.

“So what, you dreamt of dogs?”, I hear you say. Well yes, but I’m trying to change my life and rediscover magic by performing an “exorcism” possibly written in the 2nd century BC, calling upon Egyptian Gods. No point in rejecting experiences because they sound trivial now.

To me the Rite when spoken in Greek has the same mouthfeel as prayers to God I could say in church. I kinda think it is, as it even mentions an “Angel of God”. Please note that I’m definitely not suggesting that the Headless Rite is a Christian prayer, far from it. Calling upon a Headless daemon (Akephalos), Osiris, Set, Bes and others would make a Church Father have apoplexy. I’m talking about the feeling.

I do think this Angel made contact with me and the hounds represent… her. Yep, I think the angel was female. Why do I think this? Well I’ve researched the words in the Headless Rite and symbolism in my dreams. The Headless Rite is included in the Greek Magical Papyri, other “spells/rituals” in the PGM include many of the same deities and barbarous names. A certain female deity is featured quite extensively in the PGM. One of the epithets she has is “Angelos” or Angel of God, so there’s the connection. This Angelos is also more typically known as the Goddess of Magic Hekate. Her heralds are “black hounds”.

That’s when the penny dropped. I got the result I needed but not what I expected. I had not considered Hekate in any way prior to these dreams. It also explains a series of events I experienced as a young child and many other bizarre correspondences throughout my life.

What’s interesting is that it has unlocked the PGM and how I perceive magic. Whether it’s Greco-Egyptian, Solomonic, Cyprianic ( another rabbit hole right there), Chaos or Eastern magic I know that it’s actually real. The spirit world is real, divinity is real and the universe is not just a mistake of randomness explained only in materialist ways.

So call the loony bin, we’ve got a real nutter here. Life will never be the same again.

Here is a recording of the Headless Rite spoken in Ancient Greek.


If you’re interested in the Headless Rite and other magical ritual then check out the book below.

The Greek Magical Papyri in Translation: Including the Demotic Spells: Texts (Volume 1)

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Techniques of Graeco-Egyptian Magic Hardcover – 2014

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The Chaos Protocols by @gordonwhite

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anonymous asked:

Hello, I just want to say you are the best. Can I get a smut scenario with my Seunghoon (It's my birthday so pleaseeee) Love you <3

Birthday Breakfast

Genre: Smut/Fluff

Rating: R18

Summary: Birthday morning sex with Seunghoon never felt so good~

You tossed and you turn, the cool air making contact with your skin as you fluttered your eyes open. You opened your eyes to the most wonderful view you ever did see, Seunghoon. With a light smile, you observed his sleeping face. His hair in a mess, his lips parted and his eyelashes lightly pressing on his cheek, he looked heavenly no matter what he does. You couldn’t help yourself as you caressed his cheek, you had to giggle for a bit as Seunghoon knitted his brows together. 

You were having an awful lot of fun as you followed by poking his cheek. Seunghoon lazily opened his eyes to see your smiling face, which he loved to see, He stretched his whole body as he pulled you close to him. His warm hand sent shivers down your spine as he rubbed the small of your back with his thumb. 

“Happy Birthday.” He said, his husky voice was always so sexy to you. You bit your lip in response as you ran your fingers through his hair. Moments like this were irreplaceable, you gave a hearty giggle as you shyly placed your leg on top of him. 

“So early in the morning.” He teased, bringing a chuckle to the both of you. Your relationship with Seunghoon was the best. He was your bestfriend, your lover and your partner in crime. He never fails to make your heart skip a beat. Seunghoon lazily brushed his hand all the way to your bum, giving it a tight squeeze to earn a reaction from you. You squealed, a little bit surprised with his gesture.

“Look who’s talking.” You retorted with a playful smile across your lips. Seunghoon couldn’t resist as he hovered over your body, placing soft kisses on your cheeks and forehead.

“I’ll be extra nice to you today, since it’s your birthday.” He whispered before placing his lips on top of yours. You giggled against his lips, his hands feeling your naked body in between the blanket that partially covered you. You eagerly returned the kiss before his lips drop down to your neck. Seunghoon peppered you with slow and sensual kisses, making your skin tingle in anticipation. A satisfied gasp escaped your lips, letting him do whatever he wants with you as you close your eyes in delight.

Growing impatient, Seunghoon quickly removed the blanket that was covering you, leaving your body exposed to the cool air and for him to see. You could make out the marks on your thighs and hips from last night’s endeavors which Seunghoon found to be very pleasing. His lips continued to kiss every bit of you , your collarbone to your shoulder. The way he spoils you with so much love always made you feel so special. Seunghoon enjoys worshiping your body, as his large hand took hold of your breasts, kneading them as you moan out his name. You could feel your sex ache, his eyes made you feel so vulnerable when he looks at you.

His breath tickled your skin, you felt his silk like hair between your fingers as you melted into his touch. You felt every kiss he gave your body so much love, his lips made a trail all the way to the sides of your chest, placing a hot kiss each time. Your heart pounded inside of you, he went on to your stomach,then to your hips, making sure to take his time. His lips traced the marks he left and his hands were skimming up and down your body.

Seunghoon’s member was already poking your thigh. You chewed on your bottom lip in anticipation , as you found your hands away from him and gripping the sheets tightly. Seunghoon glanced up at your love drunk state, giving you a small smirk before spreading your thighs. His long fingers felt like feathers, gently teasing your sides. You closed your eyes, as lust filled your mind. His fingers stroking your wet slit, eagerly feeling your sex as his thumb brushed over your clit.

“Already this wet?” Seunghoon playfully said, as he teased your fold. You could only whimper in dissatisfaction as he continued to put you on your toes. He chuckled at your expression, dragging himself back up to give you a sweet kiss on your forehead, he added, “Impatient.” 

But Seunghoon didn’t drag the teasing for too long. He lifted your leg over his shoulder and with fervor, he eagerly entered your dripping hot sex. You yelped out profanities as he quickly filled you up with his hard member. The feeling of your warmth wrapping him made him curse under his breath. Seunghoon could see your hazy eyes and your parted lips from his line of sight, he couldn’t resist such an expression painted on your face as he abruptly snapped his hips back and forth.

You could only scream out his name at this point as he took you by surprise. His thrusts were fast, precise and it hit your sensitive spot inside of you. He continued to rock his hips back and forth, dipping in and out of your wetness. The sensation made your toes curl in immense pleasure, your gasps were lewd and the slap of your skin with his sounded erotic. 

“Seung..Hoon..” You barely moaned out as he continued to ram his hard sex inside of you. You were feeling dizzy, as you let yourself go in lust. You felt the knot inside of you break, as you let out your release. Seunghoon slowed down his pace, letting you ride out your high as he pulled out of you. He quickly grab hold of his cock, pumping it a few times before spraying his juices all over your crotch. He let out a satisfied groan as he made his way beside you. 

With sweaty bodies together, and a small smile painted on your lips, Seunghoon wrapped a loving arm around you, giving you a kiss on your cheek as he said, “What do you want for breakfast? Waffles? Eggs? Toast?” 

You chuckled at his statement, playfully hitting his chest as you responded, “I would like some Lee Seunghoon, please.”

“Really? You wouldn’t be able to eat much if you pick that one.”

“Huh? Why?”

“Because I’ll be the one eating you out.” Seunghoon raised his brows, as the two of you laughed together.