this legit took me days


Hey, I was a bored kid, and Dean actually played along.

…. For the first twenty pies, anyway.


M: We were in kindergarten. I was reading a book, and Jer was sitting next to me.

M: …But how can you be sure that he wasn’t being serious? Plus, he’s like… super straight. He’s made it clear so many times. I don’t stand a chance.


((guess who’s back bitches

batsnotbutterflies  asked:

write your fav a phic for her 16th bday on the 24th? -w- (dont hate me for the phic suggestion bc its full of memories and i wanna see how you recreate it ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ) dan and phil are out and dan keeps using cheesy pickup lines to tease phil and phil ends up taking dan into the nearest public restroom and smut ensues. oh, i KNOW you remember this ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


also u made it sound like we fucked in a public restroom just sayin’

anyways happy birthday pall ily also i’m sorry if i completely butchered our rp i tried ( & i changed stuff a lil clearly ) here we go

“Kiss me.”

Phil laughed, glancing over at his husband and raising his eyebrows. 


Dan whined, swinging their intertwined hands between them, his feet making light noises on the pavement. “Yes, again. I need a kiss.” He stuck out his bottom lip, pouting. Phil rolled his eyes. 

“Fine, fine, I’ll kiss you. Don’t cry.”

He stopped walking, pulling Dan closer by his hand and letting their lips brush. Dan grinned against his mouth, touching his face with one hand to hold him steady and pull him as close as possible. 

“Thank you,” he said finally, pulling back and squeezing Phil’s hand. Phil nodded, starting to walk again. He flashed Dan a crooked smile, poking his cheek. “You taste good.”

Phil’s eyes lit up, and he grinned widely. “Y’know, that’s actually a science thing, when two people taste good to each other-”

“You’ve said.”

Phil laughed, searching Dan’s face. 

“You’re blushing.”  

Dan blushed harder, his hand shooting to his face, his eyes widening slightly. “Oh, am I?” He laughed, his eyes flashing happily. “I guess I still kinda can’t get used to kissing you.” 

“Really?” Phil smirked. “How long have you been doing it, what, seven years?”

“Shut up.”

They were quiet for a bit, and Dan focused on the feeling of Phil’s hand on his and the slight breeze brushing against his face and through his hair. It still felt incredible that he was here, after ages of wishing for it. 

They had gone out for a lunch date and to stop by the gardens, so Phil could ask for shit and Dan could whine about it. They hadn’t done anything like this in a bit, other than their honeymoon. It was mostly hours and hours of staying inside, sleeping and talking and having sex. Lots of sex. And planning for the rest of their lives together. It was kind of heaven. 

Dan glanced over at Phil again; something he could seem to stop doing. His husband. His. It sent a warm jolt of happiness through him every time he thought about it. After all this time- finally his. 

“Hey, Phil?” Dan’s face slowly melted into a grin as something came to mind, and Phil looked at him. 


Dan squeezed his hand, shifting their fingers so they more easily slid together. He hummed, watching his feet as he walked. 

“Roses are red, my face is too, that only happens when I’m with you,” he said lightly, giggling and licking his lips. 

Phil paused for a moment, sucking in a sharp intake of breath, and laughed almost nervously. 

“Are you kidding? Was that a pick up line?”

Dan shrugged. “Maybe.”

“Whenever I use those you call me an idiot.”

Dan shrugged again, a smile tugging at his lips. “I should call you google, because you have everything I’m looking for,” he muttered under his breath, his eyes flashing. 

Phil puffed air into his cheeks, blowing it out with a huff. God. That cocky bastard, he knew how he was messing with Phil’s head. You could tell just by looking at him, the way he was searching his face, looking for a reaction. 

“Would you like another? I could do this all day.” Dan’s smile widened, and you could see his dimples popping from his cheeks. 

“Fine.” Phil ran his fingers through his hair, pushing it back, and raised his eyebrows at his husband. “Hit me.”

Dan grinned, having gotten the answer he had wanted. “Are you a magician? Because when I look at you, everyone else disappears.” 

Phil groaned, shaking his head. “That’s a good one. You probably stole it from me.”

Dan held a hand to his heart, pretending to be offended. “I did not!” He stepped out in front of Phil, taking both of his hands in his, swinging them gently and walking backwards in front of him. “More?”

Phil sighed. “I’m gonna be honest, Dan, you’re really turning me on right now.”

Dan’s eyes went wide, and his face immediately flushed red. “W-What?” Phil laughed. 

“Seven years of sex, and you still get blushy when I even mention it.” He leaned forward, kissing Dan on the lips briefly. “You’re adorable.” 

Dan glared at him, but it was clear he didn’t mean it. “Whatever.” He let go of Phil’s hands, only to clasp them together in front of him. “One more.”

Phil grumbled something under his breath, but nodded. “It better be one more.” He smirked. “Or we might have to find a bathroom.”

Dan’s eyes went even wider, and he swallowed. He ran his fingers through his hair, mussing up his curls. 

“Your lips look so lonely…” He paused for effect, licking his lips and grinning. “Would they like to meet mine?’

Phil stared at him, his mouth opened slightly, and his eyes flickered over his face. Finally he grabbed Dan’s hand, walking ahead briskly. 

“That’s it,” he said breathlessly. “We’re finding somewhere where I can kiss you senseless.”

Dan stumbled slightly, taken by surprise by Phil’s sudden firm manner. “W-Wait, you were serious…?”

“Of course.” Phil glanced around, at the nearby buildings, looking for a bathroom, preferably with stalls. “You know that drives me crazy.”

Dan hummed, walking quicker to keep up with Phil. “I mean, I hadn’t tried it. I guess now I do.”

Phil nodded, grunting softly and pulling Dan by the hand into a restroom connected to an art gallery. They didn’t even make it to the stall before their mouths were pressed together heatedly, with Dan against the wall, Phil’s hands exploring his body. 

Dan wrapped his arms around Phil’s neck, pulling him as close as possible and tugging his lower lip between his teeth. 

Phil led him with hands on his waist, stumbling blindly until they made it to a stall, closing the door behind them and pinning him against the door. 

“Jesus,” Dan breathed, breaking away to get control of himself, his eyes wide. “You were serious.”

Phil nodded, picking Dan up in a swift movement that they had done a thousand times before, and Dan wrapped his legs around his waist, clinging to him. And then Phil was kissing him again, and his mind was fuzzy. 

They both got increasingly desperate, as they always did, and soon Phil was grinding on him, holding him up by the hips and kissing him deeply. Dan moaned, making the loudest of noises from the smallest of actions. But Phil didn’t even flinch, because he was always like this. 

“You’re gorgeous,” Phil muttered against his husband’s lips, and Dan’s face went hot. 

“Thank you,” he said quietly, scratching down Phil’s back slightly, tightening his legs around his waist. 

Phil hummed against his lips, groaning quietly and resting their foreheads together. 


Dan met his eyes, raising his eyebrows in question. “Yeah?”

“I know it’s gross, but… do you want to have a… quickie…?” 

“It’s not gross,” Dan said quickly, and then blushed even darker. “I mean… yeah. I w-want you now.”

Phil licked his lips, nodding and moving his mouth to Dan’s neck, sucking at the spot he knew was Dan’s favorite. He reached up with one hand, circling his thumb over the hickeys from the night before, and other times as well. 

“Let’s darken these up, shall we?”

Dan whimpered, nodding and letting his head fall back against the stall door, giving Phil room to work. 

Phil immediately sucked at the darkest of them, right above Dan’s collarbone, pushing his sweater out of the way. 

Dan let out a shuddery breath, trying as hard as he could not to moan so loud everyone outside could hear. Phil’s mouth had such an affect on him. 

“You’re strong,” Dan said softly, trying to focus on something other than the immense pleasure shooting through his nerves and making him shiver. 

“Mhm. It’s from holding you up all the time.” Phil pushed him up slightly on the door to get a better grip, as if proving his point. 

Dan pushed his hands beneath Phil’s shirt, feeling his stomach and shoving the fabric up. Soon enough Phil had to set him down so Dan could get his shirt off, and then pick him back up. 

Dan explored his chest slowly; although he had seen and felt the pale skin a thousand times, it still felt new. 

Phil got his jeans down and then helped him shove them off, and Dan pushed Phil’s down his hips. It was messy and shaky and kind of disorganized, but neither of them cared. 

Phil pushed his hands into Dan’s boxers, squeezing his ass and grinning widely. 

“I love your ass.”

“You’ve told me.” Dan giggled despite himself- Phil was almost obsessed with his ass, it was kind of amazing. “Now fuck me.”

Phil tutted, but shoved Dan’s boxers down never the less. “Someone’s being bossy.”

Dan whined as he felt Phil line up, scratching down his back. “Shut up.”

“Tell me to shut up again and I’ll make sure you can’t walk away from this bathroom.” 

That made Dan stay quiet, because as much as he wanted that, he would rather save it for after they got home. 

Phil pushed in and Dan whimpered, burying his face in Phil’s neck and biting down on the soft skin. He pulled back right away, blushing. “Sorry.” He was always nervous he would bite too hard, or would be doing something that Phil didn’t like. 

“Shush,” Phil muttered, his voice slightly tense as he tried to keep himself from pounding into Dan until he screamed. “You can bite me, baby.”

That was all it took to have Dan pressing his mouth against Phil’s shoulder, biting him to muffle his own noises. “You feel so good,” he said breathlessly, moving again so his nose was against Phil’s neck. 

Phil made a soft noise of acknowledgement, thrusting up into him, still holding him up against the door. Dan tightened his grip, making sure he wouldn’t fall. 

“Harder,” Dan moaned, his hair falling over Phil’s shoulder and his toes curling. 

“You sure?” Phil asked, breathing heavily. “I don’t want you to be hurting-”

“Please,” Dan gasped, fucking himself down to meet Phil’s hips. 

Phil licked his lips, nodding and speeding up, listening to Dan’s loud moans and focusing on finding the angles that made him scream. 

“I love your - noises,” he growled, tugging at Dan’s hair gently. Dan just whined in response. 

Dan clung tighter with one arm, using the other to reach between his legs, getting himself off while Phil fucked him. That made him even louder, his thighs shaking from the effort of holding himself up. 

“C-Close,” he choked out, and Phil nodded. 

“Good. C’mon baby…” he nudged his nose against Dan’s, moving Dan’s face so he could kiss him deeply. “Cum for me.” 

Dan whimpered against his mouth, his eyes fluttering shut. He always got at least a little self conscious at this point, no matter how many times they did it.

“Fuck,” he gasped, moving his hand faster and bouncing a bit more to meet Phil’s thrusts. “Fuck, you’re so good, jesus fuck.” 

Phil replaced Dan’s hand with his own, jerking him off and kissing around his mouth gently. 

“C’mon Dan,” he whispered, moving his mouth to Dan’s neck instead. “Cum for me. Mmh, fuck- I’m close.”

Dan came with a loud whine, spilling over Phil’s hand and on both of their stomachs. Phil groaned, thrusting harder and faster than before, pushed to the edge by Dan’s noises and the clenching around him. It only took a matter of seconds for him to let go. 

Dan hopped to his feet, immediately stumbling and practically falling over. Phil caught him, helping him stay on his feet. 

Phil helped him to the bathroom counter, letting him sit there and cleaning them both up quickly with a paper towel. He helped Dan get dressed as well, pulling his boxers and jeans up carefully. 

“Alright,” he said softly, smiling at him. “We should go.” 

Dan bit his lip. 

“I would,” he said slowly, his voice raspy and broken. “But…”

Phil grinned. 

“Yes, Dan, I’ll carry you.” 


30 Days of Call The Midwife, Day 7: Favourite Midwife

Whether she’s known as Sister Bernadette or Shelagh Turner, as Patrick states Shleagh was always the accomplished midwife at Nonnatus. Shelagh has been a midwife for over a decade now and her passion for her work still shines through. 

The first time we met Shelagh, then Sister Bernadette, was in a professional capacity. She had just returned from a breech birth and immediately gets to work on sterilising her equipment stating “I can’t down tools until i’m set up and ready to go again,” a testament to her character. She was always called out to the most complex cases and her skills were highlighted at the Carter birth in which her abilities and pro-efficiency proved to be the difference between life and death for both mother and baby. 

In a crises she manages to keep calm and act in the best interests of the mother. Even if a life is hanging in the balance she manages to keep her composure.  She has been known to act selflessly, focusing only on others to keep them safe with not even a second thought for herself, even if she is in danger. 

When she married Patrick she “retired” from Midwifery but still helped out at the clinic and with surgery administration, helping the mothers of Poplar always at the forefront of her mind. It was only a matter of time before she returned to Nursing and Midwifery, where she belongs. 

It’s evident that helping others and putting things to rights is what Shelagh was destined to do and that is what makes her such a fantastic Nurse and Midwife.

D.GrayMan Fanworks Initiative Day 04: Alternate Universe

Decided to try something along the lines of “Street Rebels” (even though it doesn’t look like it XD) (Also I really wanted to draw Lenalee in roller blades)

This is a rough sketch that took me way too long to be honest. Hope you guys like it though :) 


Video feed from when rebels, also known as the Fabulous Killjoys, hacked into the National TV Channel on August 29, 2021. Earlier that week the police of Battery City had announced the terrorists were killed in a fight.

(edit: my url was winterpunx. i did not steal/repost these gifs from another blog.)

TalesFromThePharmacy: thank you to my pharmacist for being a dick....saved my life

I sent this message to a random pharmacist reddit user about a month ago, but I figured I may as well make it public. My post here will be more detailed. I’ve been lurking here for a while and your woes and chores and sometimes hilarious posts keep me coming back but also bring me back to my pharmacist and how he saved my life. Also to keep you guys hard on people like my past self.

I have had chronic lower back pain since childhood. Pars defect etc and in my adulthood was prescribed pain meds and meds galore for that matter, increasing in dosages and amounts..finally leading to my back surgery years later and the scripts not only continued, they increased. I’ve always worked, I have a profession, not just a job. I think that made me think I wasn’t fucked up. I convinced myself that I needed these meds to be able to continue my job. I wasn’t a junkie.

I’d noticed that my previously friendly pharmacist was getting on my nerves more and more in the months leading up to this. It wasn’t him, it was me. My fault. Early refill requests, I lost my whole bottle, going on vacation, whole 9 yards. What had I become? The very people I read about here.

So my pharmacist finally pulled me aside and confided in me that he had been having nightmares about me overdosing and the combination of the meds from my pill mill doctor were lethal. He had been over my med history and saw that I’d been prescribed rescue inhalers over the course of time and also theodur (sp) many moons ago; my drug profile indicated respiratory issues and the meds I was being handed were norco, oxy, fent patches, xanax, soma. He noticed my decline over the years and he was legit worried and made me cry that day.

I took him seriously and after a few days of mentally preparing myself and researching, I cold turkey’d myself. He saved my life. I have zero pain now, my spine surgery was successful (unbeknownst to me) but the pill mill doctor would not let me off my meds to see if the surgery had actually worked.

Months following, pill mill doctors office called asking me to come back. When I informed them that I took myself off of my medications, they seemed outraged. I told them that if they continued to call, I would lawyer up. I wasn’t a patient to them. I was a customer.

Thank you to all pharmacists and pharmacy professionals for saving my life …on behalf of myself and my entire family.

By: euclidianmath


choose 10 fandoms you really enjoy that aren’t your own & very briefly describe your muse’s role in those fandom’s verses.  i’m just curious & it’s fun as heck. 8D   then tag people you’re  curious about, ofc.

tagged by; @piraticalwit
tagging; @curufinwefeanaro @cllgood @anduna @crimeblogger and anyone else who wants to

POTC. A Morisco-heritage woman from Algiers with connections to the Barbary pirates, she has escaped her very bad marriage (by the simple expedient of killing the asshole) to a powerful merchant and is now, fairly uniquely for a woman of her time, independent and maintaining her own household. Most merely assume she’s a courtesan, in fact; and she does little to discourage this. In reality, she’s something more like a witch and a fortune-teller. She’ll tell you your fate… for a price.

DRAGON AGE.  Basically, the Inquisitor, with a canon-divergent origin. Details.

STAR WARS.  Born a Nightsister Dark Sided witch on Dathomir, she grew discontented with the politics of her sisters and refused to breed with the Nightbrother chosen for her. Due to her rebellions, she was exiled in a small one-person ship and now makes her living selling her talents with the Force, what the Nightsisters call “magick,” as a mercenary witch for hire. (Timeline flexible.)

VAMPIRE CHRONICLES. A witch from a long bloodline of witches, the power always breeding true in the female line of descent, she was married to a man from a rival witch clan in an attempt to bring an end to the centuries of hostilities between the feuding families. It didn’t work. Her husband, ungifted himself, both envied and feared her powers; and was overbearing and cruel besides. She refused to produce a child to unite their bloodlines and he turned her out. But because she had essentially betrayed her own bloodline as well, she did not return to them but took up instead a peripatetic lifestyle with her ten attendant spirits (in the form of nine black cats and one white.)

STAR TREK. Merely because Vulcans are logical does not mean there is no prejudice, no ignorance, no cruelty among them. They were once a violent race, and she was given in marriage to a man in whom those old ways arose again. She did not divorce him; she merely left, both him and the planet entirely, and in so doing rejected also the teachings of Surak… which had, after all, not prevented the treatment she received from her husband. She travels the worlds now, and is making something of a name for herself as a poet due to the uncommon depth of emotion to be found in her writing.

MARVEL/MCU.  Something something telepathic mutant something something bad marriage something something can talk to cats something something?

AMERICAN GODS. She’s the American incarnation of Sekhmet; she did not stay with Bast and Thoth and Anubis and poor mad Horus but took to wandering the backroads of the nation which had birthed her, too fierce and solitary to be domesticated like her fellow feline. 

DISCWORLD. Witchcraft might grow well in the Ramtops, but it’s not the only place it flowers. Klatch has her tradition of witchcraft also. However, its reputation there is even less savory than elsewhere, and it’s perhaps no surprise that she, like many of her countrymen, sought out new opportunities in Ankh-Morpork. She doesn’t own a restaurant. Instead, she joined the Seamstress’s Guild for the protection they could offer her – but her services are very different from theirs. She’s been known to associate with Mrs. Cake, to the horror of every single priest in the city.

DARK TOWER. Verse details.


John can’t seem to find his place in the world, and he’s just about to give up trying. Sherlock discovers a sickening trail of corpses that lead him right to the good Doctor. Somewhere along the way these two discover each other, in more ways than one.

Happy Birthday to the amazing justsuperblue (ok, it’s a tad early but oh well)

This is a gif set for the wonderful story It won’t be the War that kills you by the totally awesome justsuperblue. Go check out her blog and her story.


Schenkst Du Beim Tango Mir Dein Herz, Nights and Days


    ❝ HEROES    NEVER    DIE ❞

                Independent borderlands the pre- sequel jack. 
                                         established june 17th, 2015.