this just made you come didn't it

  • Kitchen Nightmares UK version: "Mushrooms on toast is a simple dish. Just mushrooms on toast. Yours was actually pretty good, there was just a lot going on you probably didn't need."
  • Kitchen Nightmares US version: COMING UP NEXT ON KITCHEN NIGHTMARES *Ride of the Valkyries plays* *50 tracks of explosion sounds* CHEF RAMSAY DOESN'T liKE THE F00D??????!!!!!! *strobe like montage of Gordon Ramsay eating intercut with atomic bomb stock footage* "WHAT THE F%%% IS THIS F%&%ING GARBAGE????" *Chef throws plate* *shot is repeated 4 times* "UNF%%%ING BELIEVABLE" *SURROUND SOUND MACHINE GUN SOUNDS* *graphic of Gordon Ramsay literally throwing a knife at your face* *sound of shattering windows*
3

i understand. you found paradise in tumblr. you had some good posts, you made a good blog, the blacklist protected you and the tags were plentiful. you didn’t need a friend like me. but now you come to me and you say “outofcontextarthur, they’re not monkeys, muffy was a hippo”. but you don’t ask with respect. you don’t offer friendship. you don’t even think to call me godfather. instead, you come into my blog on the day my daughter is to be married and y

deathless ♚ sentence meme
  • You will always fall in love, and it will always be like having your throat cut, just that fast.
  • You are going to break your promise. I understand.
  • You’re lonely too.
  • It will stop your breath, how cruel I can be.
  • I am a demanding creature. I am selfish and cruel and extremely unreasonable.
  • I am your servant.
  • I crawl at your feet; for before your love, your kisses, I am debased.
  • For you alone I will be weak.
  • I belong here, and you will not deny me.
  • I say these things, and the world listens.
  • I do not tolerate a world emptied of you. I have tried.
  • In the dark, I have pored over the loss of you like pale gold.
  • I will not let her speak because I love her, and when you love someone, you do not make them tell war stories.
  • I moved the earth and the water for you.
  • You will always run away with her.
  • You will always lose her.
  • You will always be a fool.
  • You will always be dead, in a city of ice, snow falling into your ear.
  • You have already done all of this and will do it again.
  • No one should be judged for loving more than they ought, only for loving not enough.
  • We look terrible to you, and severe, and you see our blood flying.
  • What we carry between us is hard-won, and we made it just as we wished it to be, just the color, just the shape.
  • There need never be any rules between us.
  • Let us be greedy together; let us hoard.
  • Do not leave me, swear that you will never leave me.
  • I am selfish. I am cruel. My mate cannot be less than I.
  • Sleep with fists closed and shoot straight.
  • I can’t abide a poor liar.
  • You look like a winter’s night. I could sleep inside the cold of you.
  • Oh, quit that. Blushing is for virgins and Christians.
  • Scold me; deny me. Tell me you want what you want and damn me forever. But don’t leave me.
  • Bad luck relies on absolutely perfect timing.
  • In his own country, Death can be kind.
  • What is the world but a boxing ring where fools and devils put up their fists?
  • Men die. It’s practically what they’re for.
  • I am no one; I am nothing.
  • Nothing in me was not made by you.
  • A revelation is always the end of something. It might even be cause for grief.
  • Just tell yourself a story that’ll satisfy you and pretend he told it.
  • Forever isn’t bright; it isn’t like that. Forever is cold and hard and final.
  • I savor bitterness - it is born of experience. It is the privilege of one who has truly lived.
  • If you want to kill yourself, do not use us as your knife.
  • What did I do wrong? Was I boring? Did I ignore you?
  • Don’t you dare speak to me like that.
  • I have worn nothing but blood and death for years.
  • I have fought all your battles for you, just as you asked me.
  • I have learned not to cry when I strangle a man.
  • I have learned to watch everything die.
  • I am not a little girl anymore, dazzled by your magic. It is my magic, now, too.
  • Are we not devils?
  • No one is now what they were before the war.
  • I have not seen you without your skin on.
  • Close up your head; your brain is getting loose.
  • We obsess. It’s in our nature.
  • I’ve a devil of a habit for being right.
  • In war you must always choose sides.
  • If you try to be a bridge laid down between them, they will tear you in half.
  • We are all dead. All equal. Broken and aimless and believing we are alive.
  • My old bones will follow yours soon enough.
  • It is better to be strong and cruel than to be fair.
  • I will see him with his skin off before I agree to fall in love.
  • After love, no one is what they were before.
  • I have survived, but I have not been spared.
  • In the space of one heartbeat to another I loved you and I was lost to you.
  • Frighten me, make me cry, only come back.
  • It’s not so bad, my darling. Being dead. It’s like being alive, only colder.
  • You’ll think it’s love, while he dines on your heart.
  • You will be so beautiful when you are old.
  • I cannot keep you and I cannot let you go.
  • You will live as you live in any world…with difficulty, and grief.
  • I look at you and it is like my throat being cut.
  • She said you’d come and I swore to eat your heart.
  • I still want to kiss you.
  • My heart is being cut in two. I cannot bear it.
  • What happens to anything beautiful?
  • I have to know, I have to or else you will just rule me until the end of everything because you know and I do not.

My boyfriend always comes home from work with assorted herbs, various chunks of wood, and cool looking rocks he found because “it made me think of you, and that you could use it for your witchcraft” and I think everyone needs someone like that

2

Sonic the Hedgehog (1991) Wallpapers: Pre-Release Wallpapers

750px X 1334px

Optimized for iPhones. If needed in a different resolution, request it here.

My Mother is Amazing
  • -I just showed her Moana tonight. After the movie: -
  • Mom: I like that Disney's been doing strong female leads with Brave and Moana.
  • Me: Anna and Elsa were a strong female leads. Elsa didn't even have a love interest.
  • Mom: Well, we all know Elsa is a lesbian.
  • Me: (laughing) What made you come to that conclusion?
  • Mom: The evidence is all there. She doesn't seem very attracted to men.
  • Me: I mean, yeah. But she has maybe three interactions with guys in the entire film.
  • Mom: She just doesn't seem that attracted to them. . .
  • -a beat passes-
  • Mom: Maybe all this shipping you're doing has gotten to my head.

° ✧ GAME OF THRONES PROMPTS. PART I.

possible triggers, read/reblog with caution.

SEASON ONE :

❛ Nine years! Why have I not seen you? ❜
❛ Where the hell have you been? ❜
❛ Would you please shut up! ❜
❛ Take me to your crypt, I want to pay my respects. ❜
❛ Surely, the dead can wait. ❜
❛ Did I offend you? Sorry. ❜
❛ What the hell do you know about being a bastard? ❜
❛ I heard you the first time. ❜
❛ It’s no mercy, letting a child linger in such pain. ❜
❛ I just want to stand on top of the Wall and pissoff the edge of the world! ❜
❛ Give me a good, clean death any day. ❜
❛ What good will my sympathies do them? ❜
❛ Your absence has already been noted. ❜
❛ One word and I hit you again. ❜
❛ I’ve half a mind to leave them all behind and keep moving. ❜
❛ You’re too hard on yourself. You always have been. ❜
❛ I swear, if I weren’t your king/queen, you’d have hit me already. ❜
❛ Trust me, that’s not the worst thing. ❜
❛ Tell me we’re not speaking of this. ❜
❛ Oh, it’s unspeakable to you? ❜
❛ Look at me and tell me what you see. ❜
❛ You broke my nose, bastard! ❜
❛ I wonder how long it’d take you to hit! ❜
❛ They hate me because I'm better than they are! ❜
❛ Glad to see you’re protecting the Throne. ❜
❛ It must be strange for you, coming into this room. ❜
❛ But you just stood there and watched. ❜
❛ Is that what you tell yourself at night? ❜
❛ How could you let this happen?! ❜
❛ I received a slightly warmer welcome on my last visit. ❜
❛ Do you remember anything about what happened? ❜
❛ Why are you here? ❜
❛ I have a gift for you. ❜
❛ Will I really be able to ride? ❜
❛ Is this some kind of trick? ❜
❛ Piss on that! I wanna hit somebody! ❜
❛ You do move quietly. ❜
❛ You’re speaking of murdering a child. ❜
❛ You will dishonor yourself forever if you do this. ❜
❛ I felt something for you once, you know. ❜
❛ Does that make you feel better, or worse? ❜
❛ You wish to confess your crimes? ❜
❛ My crimes and sins are beyond counting. ❜
❛ I’m good at convincing others to do violence for me. ❜
❛ What do you think you’re doing?! ❜
❛ I have that right, same as you. ❜

SEASON TWO :

❛ We looked for you on the battlefield, but you were nowhere to be found! ❜
❛ I…I’ve been here, ruling the kingdoms! ❜
❛ I’m glad you’re not dead. ❜
❛ Knowledge is power. ❜
❛ Excuse the interruption. Carry on. ❜
❛ It’s been a… remarkable journey! ❜
❛ You brought this on yourself. ❜
❛ I’ve done nothing. ❜
❛ Do you understand we’re losing the war?! ❜
❛ Disappeared? What, in a puff of smoke?! ❜
❛ Must be hard for you- to be the disappointing child. ❜
❛ Oh, I trust them with my life- just not with yours. ❜
❛ Three victories don’t make you a conqueror. ❜
❛ I won’t need a servant to do my beheading for me! ❜
❛ I heard you suffered a terrible head wound.  ❜
❛ I am very good at keepingsecrets for my good friends. ❜
❛ Who threatened you? ❜
❛ I understand the way this game is played. ❜
❛ I’ll have you thrown into the sea! ❜
❛ I am a pirate- I’m an excellent pirate! ❜
❛ That’s a promise that always comes true. ❜
❛ You don’t know how persuasive I am. ❜
❛ You’re the mosthonest smuggler I ever met. ❜
❛ You have no need to see this. ❜
❛ I believe we know how to pour our own wine. ❜
❛ Maybe I’ll hire this cook of yours. ❜
❛ I don’t listen to filth. ❜
❛ I appreciate your loyalty. ❜
❛ I’ll not have my honour questioned by an imp! ❜
❛ I just wouldn’t feel safe with you lurking about. ❜
❛ I command you to arrest this cutthroat! ❜
❛ Do you hear me?! ❜
❛ I think there’s more to ruling than that. ❜
❛ There’s no bigger joke in the world than that. ❜
❛ What about all the dreams you had that didn't come true? ❜
❛ Your time with the wolves has made you weak. ❜
❛ You gave me away if you remember. ❜
❛ You gave me away like I was some dog you didn’t want anymore. ❜
❛ You won’t get away with this. ❜
❛ I’ve decided I don’t like riddles. ❜
❛ You want to know what side my family fights on? ❜
❛ You gonna tell me where you’re from? ❜
❛ You can’t talk to me like that! ❜
❛ That’s twice I’ve warned you. ❜
❛ I don’t want you in my tent oneminute more than necessary. ❜
❛ It would be my pleasure. ❜

SEASON THREE :

❛ You’re wearing the wrong color. ❜
❛ When I’m free, will I be free to go? ❜
❛ I'll be free to kill you. ❜
❛ From now on, you’d better kneel every time I fart. ❜
❛ You’re telling me you saw… one of them.  ❜
❛ Did I come to the right place? ❜
❛ We’ll need to find you a new cloak. ❜
❛ I need an army. ❜
❛ It’s too beautiful of a day, to argue. ❜
❛ I am wondering why you sent for me. ❜
❛ Have you grown boredprotecting me? ❜
❛ I’m sure you’ve filled your pockets. ❜
❛ I don’t loan it out to friends as a favor. ❜
❛ I don’t even know what I’m paying you now! ❜
❛ Am I enjoying it? ❜
❛ I heard how happy you were. ❜
❛ I gave you real power and authority. ❜
❛ You brought a whore into my bed. ❜
❛ Why does everyone assume I want something? ❜
❛ A little bloody gratitude would be a start. ❜
❛ So tell me what you want. ❜
❛ I want what is mine by right. ❜
❛ The next whore I catch in your bed, I’ll hang. ❜
❛ I’m not your enemy. ❜
❛ I’ve never seen anything like it. ❜
❛ Even the bravest men fear death. ❜
❛ Tell the good master there is no need. ❜
❛ Here, I’m done with you. ❜
❛ How many do you have to sell? ❜
❛ We don’t get to choose who we love. ❜
❛ I only want to know what that means. ❜
❛ Are you frightened, child? ❜
❛ Tell us the truth. No harm will come to you. ❜
❛ I have traitor’s blood. ❜
❛ Please don’t make me say anymore. ❜
❛ Please, don’t stop the wedding. ❜
❛ That doesn’t mean they’re not worth helping. ❜
❛ I have no doubtyou will prove equal to this challenge. ❜
❛ This is the safest place in the city. ❜
❛ Any advice for me, on my new position? ❜
❛ How long will you be gone? ❜
❛ You don’t have the strength. It would kill you. ❜
❛ There is another way, a better way. ❜
❛ The blood of my enemies, not the blood of innocents. ❜
❛ What’re you doing, leading a mob of peasants? ❜
❛ I should have killed you! ❜

(fun fact: i searched the whisper photo to know who are the guys in the background and shut-your-ass that’s elijah wood i just made my everything-is-fucking-connected todd brotzman face)

Fake Chats #141
  • Seokjin: Yoongi, have you been drinking?
  • Yoongi: what? No, I need to he focused when I work.
  • Seokjin: I meant are you drinking water.
  • Yoongi: oh. I had a soda earlier.
  • Seokjin: so that's a no.
  • Yoongi: just give me the water bottle and snacks you made for me.
  • Seokjin: who says I made you snacks?
  • Yoongi: you didn't make me snacks?
  • Seokjin: of course I made you snacks, what do you take me for? Make sure you eat it all, okay? And drink all the water.
  • Yoongi: okay.
  • Seokjin: and sleep if you feel tired.
  • Yoongi: hyung.
  • Seokjin: and check on Jungkook when you come back. He's been sleeping with his neck to the side.
  • Yoongi: hyung.
  • Seokjin: maybe I should just stay with you, huh? I'm not too tired.
  • Yoongi: MOM.
  • Seokjin: yeah?
  • Yoongi: I'm good.
  • Seokjin: oh. Okay. Well, good. You'll-
  • Yoongi: check on Jungkook. What kind of dad d you think I am?

Silmarien was the firstborn child of King Tar-Elendil. As Númenorean succession laws of the time did not allow her to inherit the crown, she married Elatan of Andúnië and establihed the royal line of the Lords of Andúnië. She inherited the Ring of Barahir, and passing it down the generations it eventually escaped its destruction the Downfall of Númenor. 

mintycandytuft  asked:

It still baffles me how you have such well choreographed animations and didn't go to an art school or anything. When Megalomaniac first released I thought you'd been animating in the past already, and you're always able to do all these cool stuff in animation that seem very difficult, though I don't know the ins and outs of animation myself. To me whenever a Glitchtale episode comes out the quality gets a boost, and it's incredible how you can make long, high quality animations so quickly.

Woah, you just said I made high quality animations. 

And meant it


ily 4ever

-|Angst Starters|-
  • "How could you? I loved you."
  • "I hate you. I hate you more than anything!"
  • "Don't! Don't you dare touch me!"
  • "Look at what you've turned me into? Are you happy now?"
  • "You ruined everything. You did this. It's all your fault."
  • "I'm never going to love you."
  • "Forget about everything, act like it never happened, because I never want to see you again."
  • "Congratulations, you really made a fool out of me. For a second there, I really thought we were friends."
  • "After everything I did for you? You're just going to walk away like I never existed?"
  • "I lied about everything, about loving you, about caring. It was all a lie, and you should have known. No one could ever love someone as broken as you."
  • "Someday, I'm going to look back at this moment and laugh. Because you really believed everything I told you."
  • "You didn't really think I cared, did you?"
  • "I'm leaving. Tonight. I'm not coming back."
  • "It wasn't meant to happen, but I don't regret what I did. Even if it hurt you."
  • "You're the one person that I enjoyed tricking the most. Because you really bought it."
  • "I wanted you, every part of you. And now that I have it, I'm bored by it. By you."
BTS reaction to their older sibling visiting them

Seokjin:

He didn’t hesitate to hug you the moment he saw you sitting in front of their door.

“It’s been awhile since I saw you! What brings you here?” Ignoring his question, you just handed him the envelope that was inside your pocket.

He let a nervous laugh while taking it. “What is th… Oh my god! You’re getting married!!”

“Yeah, what can I say… When he proposed to me I found it… very engaging.

“I can already see the wedding being very emotional… even the cake will be in tiers.

(cue windshield laugh from both of you)

Originally posted by bwiseoks

Yoongi:

He wouldn’t know how to react, he would just stare at you.

“What’s with that face? Aren’t you happy to see me?”

A small smile would appear on his face. “Of course I am. But what are you doing here?”

“Am I not allowed to miss my lil’ bro?”

Hoseok:

He was on the balcony when he saw you parking your car and getting out of it. The moment he recognized you he ran to you, knocking the wind out of you with a strong hug.

“Y/N! Y/N! Y/N!!! Oh my goood!!” “Wait. We are still outside! Come in! We have so much to talk about!! Aaaa!!”

Originally posted by btsleepy

Namjoon:

He was annoyed at whoever thought they could just barge into his studio and interrupt him. But when he turned around and saw you looking down at him it all washed away.

“Is this a bad time?” you ask tilting your head.

“What? No! Of course not! Come, sit down!” “How is mum and dad? How are you?”

“Why are you so nervous Joonie?”

“I’m not nervous! Just excited to see you!”

Jimin:

It was Hoseok that opened the door and led you to their shared room. When you entered you saw your little brother sleeping in a fetal position.

“Wake up sleeping beauty.” You whispered before tickling him.

“Wh-what? S-stop it!” he managed to say between giggles.

“Look at you! You’re still a baby! My baby bro.” you said right as you hugged him as hard as possible.

“Y/N hyung is still in the room! Don’t embarrass me!”

“‘S okay Chim. We all know you’re still a baby.

Originally posted by jimiyoong

Taehyung:

You were just talking on the phone with him about how he  felt homesick and wished he could visit more often when he heard a knock on the door and told you to wait a little.

When he opened the door he saw you smiling at him with your phone still pressed to your ear.

“Do you feel better now?” you said as you closed your phone and put it back in your bag.

“But how? When?”

“At least let me in before you start interrogating me.“

Jungkook:

He was about to enter their dorm when he heard a loud “Jungkoookie” from down the hall and he already knew who that voice belonged to.

“What do you think you’re doing here? There’s only room for one Jeon in Seoul.”

“Is this how you’re going to treat me? After I came all the way from Busan just to see you? After I made mum make you all your favourite foods? Alright then. I guess I’ll just leave…”

“I was kidding!! Come in!! Oh my God! I missed you.”

As he pushed you inside the apartment  he heard a faint “fake ass bitch” coming from you.

🌸Masterlist🌸

anonymous asked:

May I ask you something that's not so much in Mor's favor? Don't you think that she should have told Az that she doesn't want him that way? She didn't need t come out to him in order to do that. Another reason to add how this whole plot was done horribly. It made her seem.. Not a great friend. She also said that she likes things the way they are to Feyre, she doesn't want to change things, it's comfortable for her (Az, her, Cass thing). I just.. Wish that all of this is different completely.

Right *rubs temples* we have finally reached a point I have been struggling with with this whole Mor…fiasco which is the tension between my desire to drag sjm through the mud for the way this was written…but also my intense desire to protect Mor’s choices as a queer character having agency with her own identity. This ask is going to be dedicated entirely to the latter (okay maybe not ENTIRELY but when I’m talking about  how Mor acted I’m going to do it in such a way that’s just ‘I wish all of this hasn’t happened how it did but it has and I’m working with what I’ve got here’) Clunky disclaimer out the way, let’s pick this apart… 

Right, first off,I would like to point out that it’s canon that Mor did actually try to talk to Azriel about this after he found her in the Autumn Court. However he wasn’t really listening and was doing some babble-confessing of his own at the time and she panicked. She was seventeen years old and the boy who just saved her life, who she knew she couldn’t be with, tried to tell  her that he loved her and she had no idea what to do so she panicked. After that it’s not really surprising she struggled with trying to explain things to him. 

Then  I think it’s important to remember a lot of things about the dynamic between Mor, Cass, Rhys and Az early on in the series when she knew Az and might have told him. So she’s only known Cassian and Azriel for two weeks when the whole Incident happens. The situation Mor is in is a  hell of a lot more complicated than ‘I slept with this one dude and this other dude loves me but I’m queer I’m not sure how to tell him’ (which is complicated enough in itself) 

Mor owes her life to all three of them at this point. Azriel saved her from the Autumn Court. Cassian and Rhys got her out of the Court of Nightmares and then proceeded to keep her out. So not is she indebted to them for saving her she is also completely reliant on them for her freedom. At this point in the canon we’re dealing with an extremely vulnerable queer girl who has been brutalised beyond belief and has only just been able to get out of her abusive situation. If the relationship she has with Cass Az and Rhys deteriorates she has nowhere else to go but back to her emotionally abusive homophobic family. 

Factor into that that she’s recently had sex with Cassian, largely because of Az and his jealousy over the two of them, and then walked away from that and the fact that she knows Azriel is in love with her but that she can’t reciprocate…I’m not surprised she’s terrified of telling them the truth. She’s grown up being told people like her are selfish and awful and that they should be forced into marriage and breeding regardless of how they feel about it, she probably believes that’s how Az and Cassian definitely, since she’s only known them about 3 weeks, will react to her. And Rhys grew up with them, they’re his brothers, she’s probably petrified of telling them the truth about her and having them all reject and abandon her which leaves her with nowhere to go but back to her father. I don’t blame her for not telling them. 

Then the War happens and she’s away from them all for a while and falls in love with Andromache and she has to go through losing her (twice) completely alone because no-one knows and she can’t tell t hem. She says herself that there was no-one for a few decades and like..Those aren’t circumstances where I’d feel like adding a whole  heaping pile of angst on top when she still isn’t sure how the boys will react so she just bottles things up and hides them away again. 

And then…Things settle out a little bit. The dynamic between her and Cass and Az finds something like what we see now, the three of them all tied together and loving each other just in different ways. And then she has to start trying to accept herself (Andromache was her first female lover and after that fell apart Mor was alone for decades, it’s hard to talk to people about something you barely understand or accept yourself) 

She has to unlearn the vile homophobia that she grew up with, she has to coax herself into trying to be with a woman again after what happened before, she has to try and explore this part of herself without letting anyone know…That’s hard. And so she finds Velaris, she finds Rita’s and at last she has a little safe place, a place where she experiment and be herself and so she does.  But that’s a safe place, a place that’s just hers, a thing that’s just hers, that no-one has yet managed to take away from her or destroy, and she feels this desperate urge to keep it safe because it’s all that’s kept her from breaking at times, knowing that no-one has ever truly known her

All of this takes time. Mor is healing and I know she’s a strong, confident woman when we meet her in ACOMAF and she’s had while to process all of this but…Abuse and that sort of homophobia and the trauma she was subjected to on top of then losing the only person she’s ever truly loved…That takes a lot of healing, that takes a lot of time to slowly build up an identity and a self-worth and by the time that happens…She needs the people around her. She has a support system in place and she deeply loves all of them. 

If she suddenly reveals that she’s queer that’s going to mess up her relationship with everyone in the Circle (except, perhaps, Amren) But everything will change and she’s only just managed to find herself and a place where she belongs and she has NEVER had that before. Cassian and Azriel both had difficult childhoods but they also both had Rhys and Rhys’ mother. Mor has not had a single positive, mutual, respectful relationship before Rhys, Cassian, Azriel and Amren. That is so fucking important for her recovery and her stability and I cannot find it in myself to shame her or hate her for wanting to keep that whole. 

Not to mention the fact that she knows this will hurt Azriel. And she loves him. I don’t care what bullshit that coming out scene spouts about her not being able to love him ‘the way he deserves’ because of her sexuality (which I have issues with) because she loves this man in a very deep, unconditional way and this will hurt him and she can’t bear that. 

So there are a lot of pressures surrounding her keeping her sexuality hidden. She’s petrified of her family, of the homophobia she grew up surrounded by and she wants to keep this one tiny piece of herself hidden from them, so they never truly know her and therefore can’t own or break her. She’s petrified of losing the Circle, who she owes her life, freedom, power and stability to, they’re her support system and the only truly positive relationships she’s ever known. of course she’s terrified of losing that? And she’s scared of hurting Azriel and wrecking her relationship with someone that she truly and genuinely loves, even if she doesn’t want to be with him romantically. 

Also I think, when you mention that she didn’t have to come out to explain things to Azriel I think….In this case it’s complicated by them? She’s already walked away from him once while he was trying to tell her that he loved her…If she just goes to him and tells him that she can never ever be with him without the context of her sexuality…That’s going to ruin him? And she knows that. She knows how he sees himself and she’s probably terrified of offering up that rejection because the Circle is Az’s safe space and support network too and she loves him. She cannot just say ‘I don’t want you, I never will’ because then it will just…sound like he’s not good enough for her and he never will be? It’s going to sound like a ‘him’ problem than it just being the way that she is and she knows that would shatter him. (You can argue all you like that this is an Azriel problem and it’s not on her to fix or attend to his insecurities, and it’s not, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy for her to just shatter him like that? This is the reality of their situation) 

Also, on the subject of her not wanting to change it…I want to make it clear that I don’t think this is actively good for her. Like, I’m sorry, but if you think that Azriel, a straight man, is suffering more for Mor not feeling like she’s able to come out, feeling ‘petrified’ of facing him with this, than she is…I don’t know what to say to you. 

Being closeted is not fun. It’s not a little ‘straight passing’ card that you get to wave around so you can blend in with the normal people and not get noticed, it’s hard. It’s painful. It’s frightening. It’s constantly having to censor yourself whenever you’re talking to people, constantly worrying if they’ve figured it out even though you’re not ready, this constant paranoia and this guilt that builds up and the frustration and the hurt at not being able to be yourself. 

This situation is harming more exponentially more than it is Az and when she says that she doesn’t want it to change that’s not her being selfish. at all. 

(Especially when, as Mor told us herself in ACOMAF, she could peel her clothes off in front of Azriel and he wouldn’t move. He isn’t ready for this relationship anyway. He could have gone to her as well at any point in these 500 years and approached her about this and he hasn’t. Mor is not the only one maintaining this stasis between them and telling herself it’s ‘good enough’ this thing is mutual. 

Azriel isn’t technically losing out on anything by this because he hasn’t tried to make a move or talk to her about it and isn’t ready for the relationship himself? Maybe he could have moved on if she’d given him a concrete no but like…After five hundred years…He could have damn well just decided to move on for himself, like I’m sorry. A man should not need a flat out rejection from a woman (which, you could argue that he’d gotten when she walked away from him when he told her he loved her) to move on with his life, okay. 

He could have made that choice for himself she is not stopping him making that choice and she is not ‘stringing him along’ either, she isn’t hinting that oh maybe some day this might happen, not today but maybe tomorrow, she’s avoiding the subject and she has Cassian buffer them ffs to try and protect her from this. That’s not stringing him along, like, sorry) 

“Whenever Azriel makes his feelings clear, like he did with Eris … It’s stupid, I know. It’s so stupid and cruel that I do this, but … I slept with Helion just to remind Azriel … Gods, I can’t even say it. It sounds even worse saying it.”

“To remind him that you’re not interested.”

“I should tell him. I need to tell him. Mother above, after last night, I should. But …” She twisted her mass of golden hair over a shoulder. “It’s gone on for so long. So long. I’m petrified to face him—to tell him he’s spent five hundred years pining for someone and something that won’t ever exist. The potential fallout … I like things the way they are. Even if I can’t … can’t really be me, I … things are good enough.

Right, regardless of how you personally view Mor’s sexuality (bi/gay/queer/whatever you wish) the fact of the matter is that, in canon, Feyre states THREE TIMES that Mor did not enjoy sleeping with Helion and that she got no pleasure out of it. She’s described as ‘pale and vacant’ the next day and during the coming out scene Feyre actually thinks of her as looking ‘tortured’ okay, she is not enjoying this. The fact of the matter is, Mor is repeatedly having sex with men…For Az. To keep him at a distance. This is…Like I’m sorry but if you can’t see how fucked up that is (for HER) I don’t know what to say to you. She’s repeatedly putting herself in sexual situations she may or may not want that she does not seem to enjoy…For Azriel. 

She is suffering here, okay. She is closeted, that’s painful, that’s hard in itself but she also has this to deal with. Azriel’s affection has kept her closeted (in part) all these years and she is PETRIFIED of facing him with this?? How can this possibly be purely selfish on her part? How is she the only one getting flack for doing what she needs to do to keep herself safe

Especially when it’s hurting her like? ‘Good enough’ it’s just..It’s like Lucien’s situation in the Spring Court. That was ‘good enough’ for him, yes he was being abused  horrendously, no he didn’t have any real agency or power over himself or freedom or love or respect but it wasn’t the abusive shithole he was trapped in all those years so it was ‘good enough’. 

That’s what this good enough is, okay. She cannot be herself. She cannot openly love who she wants to. She has to suffer heartache and grief alone and isolated because she can’t tell anyone how she feels. She is ‘petrified’ of facing Azriel. She is closeted and that hurts. She is also GUILTY AS FUCK. She’s doing all of this, hiding herself, hurting herself, sleeping with people she doesn’t get any pleasure out of, and has been doing this for five  hundred years and she still feels horrifically guilty about this. She’s said in that coming out scene too that she wants to be able to love Azriel the way he deserves but she can’t. She’s tried to change herself and has hidden herself and hurt herself all for this relationship that she doesn’t want, that makes her uncomfortable? 

She likes things the way that they are  because these are the first people who accepted even a part of her. They love her and they respect her and they treat her with dignity and gave her basic fucking needs from a relationship and that is ‘good enough’ for her. Because she grew up with emotionally and physically abusive homophobic parents who accepted no part of her, who treated her like an animal, or worse, and then she found this…She found this love and respect and of course she doesn’t want to change it. Of course she doesn’t want to lose it. Of course she’s terrified of telling them and seeing that same hatred that lived in her parents’ eyes. Even if she knows it’s irrational that doesn’t matter. She’s a terrified queer abuse victim and she is suffering, she cannot be herself, but that’s good enough because what choice does she have, really? 

Mor is a closeted, scared, vulnerable, abuse survivor who is petrified of losing the only safe space that she’s ever had just because of who she is. She is suffering 100 times more from this situation than Azriel or anyone else in the Circle. I will not sit here and call a queer character selfish or a bad friend or any of it for doing what she feels she has to to protect herself. Especially not when most of the things that she’s doing are more damaging for her than they are for anyone else. I love Azriel, I relate to his character a lot, but I’m not going to sit here and prop up this ‘oh no poor boy’ while Mor gets thrown under the bus because she is afraid. 

Her identity is her own and this choice, revealing this part of herself to who she chooses, is one of the only pieces of ultimate agency that she has ever had. I won’t say she was wrong to keep it hidden, keep it safe, if that made her feel okay. Mor’s situation is not ‘good enough’, Mor’s situation is deplorable and painful and I refuse to call her selfish for maintaining something like this because she is absolutely terrified of the alternative. 

Queer people have the right to be in the closet for as long as they need to be in order to feel safe. It is not for anyone else (especially not straight characters a la Feyre) to tell them when they should come out. They are not ‘liars’ for being closeted. They should not feel guilty for being closeted and keeping themselves safe. That’s a disgusting way of looking at things and it’s an incredibly damaging mentality to have. 

‘Out and proud’ is great, okay, but it’s not possible for everyone. A queer person’s safety comes first and if they feel that they need to keep their sexuality hidden in order to do so that is their choice. And it is not up to anyone, especially those who have no way of understanding what this feels like, to judge them or shame them or guilt-trip for that. It’s not selfish to want to protect yourself and not risk ruining the relationships you have with those around you for the sake of telling them something they do not have a right to know unless you choose it. 

In the end I will chose validating and defending a queer person’s decision to keep their identity hidden for their own personal reasons and safety over the feelings of anyone who feels like they might have been entitled to know this every. Single. Fucking. Time. 

Manchester By the Sea is incredible in the most understated way possible. It seems like it should be this extremely dramatic over-acted film, and instead it just felt like invading someone’s actual life. I didn’t actually spend any of it laughing or crying, just feeling. I was brought back to my own memories of that kind of overwhelming grief that’s awkward and you have no idea how to even deal with it. Casey Affleck says a million words without speaking. There is such an understanding of real grief and it made the whole film so cathartic. It cut like a knife and was a relief at the same time. 

aesthetic - Fine Class Clexa™