this is why i'm sexually frustrated

anonymous asked:

So I'm gay af but I'm also super femme. I understand that being femme is also a privilege bc I'm "straight passing" but it's been so so frustrating trying to justify my sexuality when people don't believe me fully or at all when I say I'm gay. bc I don't "look gay" and I've gotten the "you're too pretty to be gay." which is such bullshit. but I just wish people would believe me? I feel like I'm in a constant state of coming out. Also fuck that last anon/hater, your relationship is cute af!!!

heteronormative society trying to push boxes (honestly, cages) onto queer people and queer relationships is why shit like this is a thing.

me and my girl dress masculine at the same time? we can’t be dating. we’re bros on the prowl.

One of us dresses more masc than the other? Called “the man”, is given the check, has to all of a sudden play a role? act a certain way. behave a certain way. have certain mannerisms.

her and I dress femme? just gals being pals. all we do is have pillowfights and giggle and never fart.

Somewhere in between all of this? what’s goin on heerreeeee. facial glitch. confusion ensues.

Mind you, I’m never taken seriously as a Bisexual. I dress Masc? lol lying. I dress Femme? lol lying. Even when I typically tread in the fluid gender expression andro area I’m somehow trying to deceive people. Even my gf has mentioned pressure trying to behave a certain way being Lesbian. And honestly, the only thing to actually blame is the society that forced us to make a community in the first place. It’s no one’s fault but that. This isn’t a inter-community problem, but because we’ve allowed ourselves to be influenced by people who aren’t queer, it has become an inter-community problem.

but this is Str8 Society talking. I think we as a community need to start rejecting these pressuring cookie cutter straight goggles that have been pushed onto us and break through. Realizing there is no wrong way to look/act/be LGBT+

Barriers

Summary: He was always so confident…until he saw you.
Word Count: 1k
Characters: Daeil (24K) x Reader (Y/N)
Genre: Romance / Comedy
Warnings: Slight swearing
Rating: PG-13
A/N: This goes out to all my WOC who love Kim Daeil as much as I do.

Originally posted by justiceforafterschool

A thin hand placed on his shoulders, startling the poor boy from his intense staring to look up at the amused face of Cory’s girlfriend. “Someone’s looking extra sexually frustrated tonight, hm?” She joked, settling her place next to her boyfriend and giving their oldest a kiss on his cheek in greeting.

Kisu laughed as he placed down his half empty glass, although the sound was lost in the loud club music, “Daeil’s been eye fucking the girl for the past hour we’ve been here!”

The blond turned to glare at his smirking friend before sighing, “How am I supposed to talk to her, geniuses?”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

☕️Unpopular opinion: I hate how the fandom is so stuck in this idea that Lena's gay. There's zero actual evidence of this. It's just getting annoying that every picture of her is marked with "lol she gay dude" and "she eats pussy." I understand subtext and what not but she's clearly not gay no matter how much everyone says she is. (Before anyone tries to call straight hate, I'm not)

i definitely see why that’s such a popular thing in the fandom, as she’s done some Very Not Straight things and exchanged some definite Not Straight looks with kara, and if i cared to i’d probably share the same opinion as others regarding her sexuality, and i never want to understate the importance of lgbt headcanons, those shouldn’t be invalidated or taken away from a community because they do serve a definite purpose. i think what’s frustrating for me in this instance is that often times people have been treating her and discussing her as if her visibility and involvement from a standpoint of representation is as important as actual canon lesbian characters. 

whether people want to acknowledge it or not, her not being gay does shape the way in which the writers have been handling her, and also, probably more importantly, also shapes the way the general audience views her. maggie and alex are visible and present examples of the ways in which a character’s sexuality influences audience perception of the character as a whole. it’s in your face, it cannot be ignored as long as someone is watching the show. maggie and alex serve a very specific purpose in that regard that lena cannot and does not. they contribute to people who don’t participate in fandom’s awareness of lesbianism, they help the kids who don’t have twitter and tumblr see themselves on a popular family show, and they’re also subject to ridicule purely on the basis of their sexuality. these are all things, no matter how strong the headcanon, lena as a character will never provide or bring about.

which is why things like… calling a hypothetical character death of lena “bury your gays”, or supposing that lena is somehow better representation than maggie because of maggie’s lack of airtime (an issue that genuinely confuses me considering a straight guest star getting more narrative importance than a gay series regular is really not that groundbreaking and is actually a huge issue) gets really annoying, really fast.

that was a reallly long explanation but basically my thoughts are “cool i see why you have that headcanon but please don’t act as if that headcanon represents the same things that canon does”

send me a ☕️ and an opinion (popular or unpopular) and i’ll say whether i agree or disagree

anonymous asked:

Why would do this to me?!? What's the point of life anymore ¿¡¿ What's BTS ¿¡¿ what's Kpop ¿¡¿ what is you ¿¡¿ I'm just.. Ugh, i didn't knew I was this sexually frustrated until I found your blog like let me breathe you hooman!! You know ive a brother, and he's a lawyer in high court. Guess what, I'm calling him, to sue you, for making me go through so many emotions at once I think I'm going to have a mental breakdown ¿¡¿ why would do this to me? ¡ I'm just a 🐣

Deep breaths man. Deep breaths o.o

Originally posted by pizza-in-human-form

  • jason: i still don't get why damian's authorized to use the batcomputer and i'm not?? he's like 10
  • bruce: jason, last time i gave you unsupervised access to the computer you changed your death certificate to read "kinkshamed to death"
  • jason: oh my god that was ONE TIME, and to be fair i was frustrated because your shitty system wouldn't recognise "hot dads hmu!!!" as a legitimate sexual orientation
  • bruce: for the record, neither is "sunglasses emoji"

anonymous asked:

How do you interpret Sherlock's feelings for Irene, if not romantic or sexual? Why does he keep her phone (or watch in Victorian MP, both of which fandom have taken to symbolise his 'heart')? Why did he rescue her after she screwed him over? Why is she constantly referenced or appearing naked in his MP? Don't worry, I'm not an Adlocker, I'm just trying to figure these things out myself and get frustrated. :-/

Hello- once again, sorry for the delay in answering this! I have a lot of feelings about this, haha ;)

Okay, so I’ll be repeating what many others have said in this, but I agree that Irene is Sherlock’s mirror, through and through. I think this still stands in ACD’s A Scandal in Bohemia, too- Irene is disguised as a man when she says “Goodnight, Mr Sherlock Holmes,” and Sherlock Holmes frequently disguises himself in canon.

They take this mirroring to the next level in Sherlock, though. On a visual level, Irene and Sherlock are strikingly alike: dark hair, pale skin, similar build. And, to really hammer home that point, Irene even wears Sherlock’s coat.

Furthermore, Irene represents Sherlock’s sexuality, what he has repressed. That’s why he is so fascinated by her- Irene is essentially the ‘Consulting Detective’ of Sex- she “deduces” people’s preferences: “I know what he likes.”

That’s why she pops up naked inside his mind palace, but Sherlock isn’t ready to face his sexuality yet: “Not now, I’m busy!”

And, it’s so telling that when Sherlock meets Irene, he is just faced with question marks- he can’t figure her out. He can’t figure himself out. And, that is only properly addressed in The Abominable Bride, where Sherlock is solving the mystery/case of his own heart: “I shall have to go deep into myself.”/”Why do you need to be alone?”

And, I think Sherlock partly saves Irene… because he sees himself in her. Irene “loses” to sentiment, she falls in love (as Sherlock does)- and, that whole scene where Sherlock seemingly defeats her is just so heart-breaking if you read it as Sherlock also talking to himself: “Sentiment is a chemical defect found in the losing side. […] You just couldn’t resist it, could you?”

I also really wouldn’t worry about Irene’s picture being in Sherlock’s pocket-watch. @ramblings-from-yours-truly​​ has pointed out that visually parallels Holmes’s picture of Gabrielle in the opening to The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes- and we know that film presents a gay Sherlock. I think the fact that Sherlock keeps Irene’s phone/picture acts as a way to incite us to think, to challenge (heteronormative) convention. Why are we automatically assuming that Sherlock/Holmes keeping Irene/Gabrielle’s picture= romantic and/or sexual attraction? Because Sherlock/Holmes is a man, and Irene/Gabrielle is a woman?

I understand that it’s very easy to come to that conclusion, as it’s a pattern in fiction that’s been told so many times, and we’ve been trained to follow it, in a sense. A suave, enigmatic man carries around some sort of object that is symbolic of a Woman…. all very James Bond.

But, the thing is, Sherlock works at breaking down the audience’s assumptions, forcing us to re-assess clichés and our often prejudiced heteronormative ‘instincts’ about where the story is going. We are shown that the James Bond like version of Sherlock is a fiction with the Hollywood-kiss with Molly being a fantasy, and John saying does not believe the “brain without a heart” version of Sherlock he presents to the public.

So,  Sherlock keeping Irene’s phone/ her picture in his watch, does symbolize his heart, I think… in the sense that Irene= Sherlock himself/Sherlock’s sexuality. Plus, @57punches and I also discussed here the implications of a gay 19th century Sherlock keeping a woman’s picture in his pocket-watch= Sherlock disguising his heart’s desires in order to protect them…

Thanks for the question! <3

bts-ella  asked:

(GIF reaction;all 7 members) How would they react when they want to have some sexy times ;) with you(of course you are their girlfriend) but you refuse because you think you are chubby and you decide to lose weight. Btw i love this blog! It's amazing! ;) <3

[mildly sensitive topic regarding weight]

Jungkook: “Is that the reason? Why are you worried about that?” *kind of wants to continue with the sexy time on the inside*

Originally posted by go2bedjungkook

Jimin: *uses seductive power* “Sex now, diet later.”

Originally posted by jungsoojung

Taehyung: *switches to cute TaeTae mode* “I’ve never thought that…”

Originally posted by luniekyu

Hoseok: “WHY DO YOU THINK YOU NEED TO DIET, MY SWEET ANGEL??!!”

Originally posted by jjungkook

Namjoon: *sincerely* “You know, you’re beautiful to me no matter what.” 

Originally posted by yoonkooks

Yoongi: *tries to put away sexual frustration* “I don’t really care about that stuff, but, hey, do what you want.”

Originally posted by yoonsaur

Seokjin: “Well that’s fine if it makes you happy…”

Originally posted by mingloss

- Devi o(^◇^)o

anonymous asked:

So I've asked a couple times but I guess yall havent seen it. Since I was 12 and first learning about sex, I've had terribly intrusive sexual thoughts that have lasted until now (im 17 now). I constantly have impulses that I'm always afraid I'll act on and it's all really embarrassing because idk why I have these thoughts. They also come in the form of abuse sometimes like I'll have intrusive thoughts of abusing myself in terrible ways. It's gotten better but it's still frustrating to deal with

Hi Anon,

We’re sorry we didn’t get to yours right away. This is the third time you’ve submitted this in three days. We get a dozen or more asks a day, and we are doing our best to keep up, as well as answer questions we are best equipped to answer. Here is what a google search about intrusive thoughts have told me:

How To Overcome Intrusive Thoughts:

To overcome intrusive thoughts, it’s important to first realise you’re in complete control of yourself and it simply feels like you’re not when an intrusive thought has a strong grip on you. Knowledge is very important if you’re going to achieve that, so here’s a page that’ll help you to understand intrusive thoughts and explain how you can overcome them:

Intrusive thoughts are ego-dystonic. This means they’re the very opposite of your character. You have these thoughts because you DON’T want them because they’re everything you’re against morally and as a result you’re perceiving them as threatening, so your brain flags them as important.

You never have to fear acting on an intrusive thought. You’re terrified of these thoughts. They’re your worst fears which is why they’re so hard to ignore and you’re suffering as a result. You’re not just suddenly going to reverse your character and find it acceptable to act on them. You’re only suffering like this because you’re a good, kind and moral person.

Analysing the thoughts is the problem. Every human being has intrusive thoughts. However only OCD sufferers react to them for a prolonged time rather than shrug them off because of how our brains flag them as important. The more attention you pay to an intrusive, the more it sticks around because it’s being given importance that it doesn’t deserve to have. By accepting that you’ll have these thoughts and understanding that you’re the one in control you can get on with life whilst they’re in your head in confidence they’ll fade out when you don’t respond to them and as a result show your brain they’re not a threat.

Spiking is a good thing. Spiking refers to an increase in symptoms (intrusive thoughts, anxiety, compulsions) as a result of an intrusive thought that gets our attention. Spiking is incredibly uncomfortable so is often avoided by sufferers. However, spiking is actually a good thing, as it’s an opportunity to practise recovery techniques. You should put yourself in situations that you find uncomfortable (e.g. if you have a fear of being a rapist, go outside and walk past as many people as you can rather than avoiding going outside at all) because then you’re facing your fear and proving to yourself that you’re in control.

Beware of ‘backdoor’ spikes. When you start to recover you’ll notice a decrease in anxiety. This does not mean you’ve become your fear. It simply means you’re starting to understand the thoughts are ludicrous and not threatening. If people analyse the fact they’re not suffering anxiety as a result of an intrusive they’ll ruminate in fear having become what they loathe (which causes them to spike again) but this is simply not the case.

Knowing this will give you the tools you need to start tackling your disorder. You’ll suffer more anxiety at first (especially if you’re spiking yourself intentionally), but it’ll lead to long term relief, which is far better than the temporary relief reassurance provides.

What Are Intrusive Thoughts?:

Intrusive thoughts are thoughts that consistently enter your mind against your will. They’re considered intrusive because you simply cannot get them out of your mind, and they often pop up at unusual moments. Intrusive thoughts may also occur in flashes, and often cause significant anxiety when they enter your mind.

Many people experience intrusive thoughts with anxiety, and they may cause significant distress. That’s why it’s so important that you find relief. If you haven’t yet, take my 7 minute anxiety test.

There are many different types of intrusive thoughts, but they generally fall into these categories:

  • Unwanted Memories – Though not often considered an “intrusive thought” in the medical sense, many people experience persistent, unwanted memories. Those with PTSD are especially prone to these types of memories, but anyone may have a memory that causes them significant distress, and those with anxiety are more likely to have that memory pop up at unwanted times.
  • Violent Thoughts – Thoughts of violence and aggression may also be common in those with some types of anxiety, especially obsessive compulsive disorder. Generally, these are thoughts were the person imagines themselves doing violent/aggressive things. However, one could consider worries about danger happening to other people to be violent thoughts as well.
  • Sexual Thoughts – Like violent thoughts, a person can have unwanted sexual thoughts. Sometimes these sexual thoughts are paired with religious-induced shame, while other times the sexual thoughts may also be somewhat violent in nature. These are also more common with those with specific types of anxiety disorders.

Still, any thought that comes at an inappropriate time may be considered an intrusive thought. Those with phobias may randomly experience a flash of the object that causes them fear, and in some cases that thought may be considered intrusive.

The steps you can take to help break the cycle of repetitive, scary thoughts:

1. Revisualization - take a few times throughout the day where you can sit comfortably and visualize your scary thoughts in a more less threatening way. You can use humor or stupidity to downplay those thoughts to less frightening thoughts. Whenever the thought pops into your head throughout the day, remember your NEW visual and take the time to picture them differently.

2. Positive Self-Talk - use self-talk that reassures you that you would never carry out the thoughts you think. You have the power to DO or NOT DO anything you want. Remind yourself that it’s okay that those thoughts are there. Do not resist them…. accept them as just “thoughts” and nothing more. They cannot hurt you or make you do anything you don’t want to do.

3. Shrink the chatter box! - see your obsessive thinking as nothing but thoughts. These thoughts are nothing but a loud chatter box that never shuts up and the more it irritates you, the stronger and louder it gets. Realize that you can shrink the chatter box, simply by accepting that it’s there and downsizing the importance of what it’s saying. The better you get at doing this, the more you will realize that your repetitive thoughts fade into the background and become less threatening and important to you.

4. Thought StoppingThought stopping is a technique that is highly effective when used alone or when used in conjunction with the other steps listed here.

It is not uncommon for people to think that it won’t work for them, but I assure you that if you work hard, you can feel comfortable again in your own mind. Some people need the aid of a therapist, coach or even medication and this is completely acceptable. See your doctor or coach for further help. This is what they are there for!

I want to be sure that you know that all people experience random thoughts on a regular basis. They are thoughts that don’t really mean anything, they just come in and go out. The problem with the anxious person is that they are more sensitive and aware of these thoughts and when they find a thought that is scary, obscene or “wrong”, they pull it aside and pick it apart and try to analyze why they are having it. Instead of “letting it go” and dismissing it for the very fact that it has no importance, they dissect it looking for reasons.

The main cause for obsessive scary thoughts is exhaustion and stress and they can be overcome with education, understanding, support.

Treatment of Sexual Obsessions / Thoughts in OCD:

Treatment of sexual obsessions is complex and individualized.  In my Palm Beach Gardens, FL practice, I treat many individuals with OCD sexual obsessions usingexposure and response prevention (ERP) and cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT). Treatment involves confronting fear triggers in a systematic way while resisting rituals and avoidance behaviors. With consistent practice, these fear triggers lose their power over you.

Overcoming sexual obsessions is not based on definitively proving that these obsessions are unfounded. Although this outcome would be desirable (if possible), someone with a strong tendency toward OCD doubt can never eliminate all traces of doubt in a way that is fully satisfying. After all, if you have these types of symptoms, you’ve probably already spent months or years trying unsuccessfully to accomplish this goal.

Am I sure that I don’t secretly want to have sex with _________? Trying to answer this question with a resounding “No” is ultimately doomed to fail. It’s not the question itself that is the problem. It’s actually your exhaustive attempts to disprove the possibility that perpetuates your symptoms. I have discussed this idea in more detail in my posts onthought control and unwanted thoughts.

Instead, successful, effective treatment of OCD is based on learning to accept uncertainty about the things we can’t know for sure. You might not know with 100% certainty whether or not you could become a pedophile, but neither does anyone else. People without OCD-related sexual obsessions accept this doubt, without engaging in efforts to avoid or neutralize. This is the goal of treatment: to accept doubt without avoidance or neutralization. This is the key to breaking free from sexual obsessions and living a happy, healthy life.

I hope this help you.

Best,

Lena

okay why the hell is kara super straight? NO ONE IS %100 straight. i mean COME ON. lena *exists* and most of my friends are basically questioning their sexuality right about now. having gay frustrations is so unhealthy rn smh . i mean… cant you just make kara a little gay? just make her confuse of her sexuality and i’ll be satisfied i promise.

Originally posted by allreactions

okay, but what was up with that kiss between Shayla and Angela ? it felt significant to the scene, and if Angela isn’t bisexual then it’s just confusing and kind of queerbaiting

engi-ler  asked:

It is very poor writing when a character simply goes "by the way i'm X, just so you know" when there is no logical reason why they would say that in a conversation. That is pretty much why no one has said anything yet. (I can't think of a single scene in the last season where it would have made sense to talk about sexuality.) Also there is a big difference between "the fans are frustrated" and people going "rooster teeth are anti LGBT". These people ARE treating LGBT characters like objects.

It is very poor writing when a character simply goes “by the way i’m X, just so you know” when there is no logical reason why they would say that in a conversation.

1.) that’s your opinion
2.) Straight people say “no homo” all the fucking time in reality, and you think it’s not logical for an LGBT+ person to say “Uh, I’m [identity], just so you know” in a normal conversation?
3.) NO ONE IS SAYING THEY HAVE TO WRITE THEM EXPRESSING THEIR IDENTITY THAT WAY

A writer/creator’s job is to find a way to make a scene seem natural. There are plenty of writers and series that accomplish that with NO ISSUE. Even the series that DO make the character say “I’m [insert identity]” are STILL more progressive than RWBY as of Volume 3, because RWBY still DOESN’T have a confirmed LGBT+ character in it’s 3 years of existing.

Even when a series DOES go out of it’s way to make the character’s implications subtle, there are ALWAYS viewers who argue against BLATANT context clues, because A.) They’re oblivious or B.) they didn’t explicitly say their identity out loud, and therefore, it doesn’t count as “proof.”

I can say all day that “Yang is, at the very least, sapphic, because she’s expressed her interest in men in Volume 1, while also interacting with Blake in ways resemble Sun’s gestures of attraction to her in Volume 2” but because it’s never stated that Yang actually is Bi/Pan/other identities, people can say that what I’m saying “isn’t necessarily true,” and THEY CAN STILL BE RIGHT.

That is pretty much why no one has said anything yet. (I can’t think of a single scene in the last season where it would have made sense to talk about sexuality.)

You can’t think of a scene where it makes sense to talk about sexuality, but you take no issue with scenes in Volume 3 that are already canon and portray attraction/relationships between characters such as:

  1. Jaune’s long and ridiculous scene trying to imitate RWBY’s use of ship names for battle formations, including “Arkos” as the name for his and Pyrrha’s battle plan
  2. Neptune flirting with team NDGO
  3. Weiss being angry at Neptune, someone she’s attracted to, before his match against team NDGO
  4. Sun winking and shooting finger guns at Blake in the stands
  5. Blake talking about her relationship with her ex-boyfriend, Adam, when Yang is framed during the Vytal Tournament and the team gets disqualified
  6. Jaune and Pyrrha’s KISS SCENE IN THE VOLUME 3 FINALE BEFORE SHE DIES

But you think that writing LGBT+ characters “naturally” isn’t feasible when all of these other things have occurred in VOLUME 3 ALONE. That’s double standards.

Also there is a big difference between “the fans are frustrated” and people going “rooster teeth are anti LGBT”. These people ARE treating LGBT characters like objects.

Then take up the “RT is anti-LGBT+” with the person that ACTUALLY said it, rather than me? Cuz I’m not the one that made that comment, LMFAO.

Even if it’s not true (and I KNOW it’s not) do you really think that the comment is without merit, despite how heavy-handed it is? People who aren’t “anti-LGBT+” are still capable of transphobic and homophobic behavior and erasure (such as queerbaiting!) and it’s one of those things that needs to constantly be checked, examined, and addressed, regardless of how “progressive” and “accepting” someone thinks they are.

anonymous asked:

Why is it wrong to have only LGBT+ characters die? Like, if I have a book thag only has 2 characters, one is, say, trans, and that person happens to die instead of the other, why is that problematic? I'm genuinely curious.

When I was growing up the message I got from mainstream fiction regarding my sexuality was “you are doomed to be beaten/murdered violently/die tragically from suicide at a young age and you will lose all your friends and family.” 

There are so few lgbt+ characters in mainstream fiction and death and tragedy almost always follow them. So when the rare lgbt+ character appears in mainstream fiction, it’s a big deal for a lot of people. When the only character(s) who dies also happens to be the only lgbt+ character, it’s frustrating and it sends the message that I wrote above.

There are exceptions to this. A lot of things depend on context. For example, if a story has a small cast and the only lgbt+ character is an elderly person who dies from old age, I doubt I would associate that death with tropes surrounding dead lgbt+ characters. Others might disagree. Furthermore, violence and suicide are huge issues for lgbt+ people in real life and there is still a place for stories about those issues. It’s just that the “lgbt+ person dies tragically” plot seems to be the go-to plot for many writers and we’d like that to not be the first thought that comes to mind.