this is what it all boils down to

anonymous asked:

ok but the phandom steals stuff all the time? I'm not being rude but @dnpflops was kind of my favorite account? : ))))))))))))))))

that doesn’t make it okay, i’m talking about this happening WITHIN the phandom. theft of others’ intellectual content is not okay. don’t post things that don’t belong to you. that is what this all boils down to. period

What bothes me about ace discoursers simply put would be their intelligence

Let me explain. People like myself and others who are accepting of arospec people in the community (myself being asexual but biromantic) see discoursers make posts over and over again about the exact same thing, being the reasons why aspec people don’t belong,.

HOWEVER

They also have their ideas beaten down, proven to be completely false, and show that all that their only REAL reason for being exclusionists boils down to an inherent need to control what’s allowed within a certain place. They highly enjoy their gatekeeping as it is almost identical to the rhetoric I’ve seen in the past on the bi discourse. They repeat the same things over and over again, without coming up with anything new to counter OUR points that we use to counter theirs.

And what have they been reduced to now?

Stupid spectacles like this

They aren’t even putting up any intelligent arguments anymore. They make jokes of their criticism and in turn make themselves complete and total jokes.

Aphobes have no real; argument, no real ability to make themselves be taken seriously anymore.

So yeah just ignore them at this point.

Music in Fallout

Music in Fallout is a big part of the games, everyone has a favorite radio station, a favorite song, a memory they associate with the songs. But the 50s tunes are more than just background noise.

Fallout’s music is reflective of the game it appears in in many ways. For example, Fallout New Vegas is set in the American West, so the radio stations play mainly country. Not only is this appropriate for the theme, but it also fits the idea of what Pre-War Americans living in the Nevada area would have listened to. Fallout 3 & 4’s music is very jazz heavy, which also fits the idea of what a Pre War American in New England may have liked.

In Fallout: New Vegas, the country music has heavy themes of love, money, or moving on to something new. The songs all represent these themes in different ways, some songs are about falling in love (Mad About the Boy), leaving a trail of lovers behind you (Jingle, Jangle, Jingle), or missing a lover you had long ago (Johnny Guitar). It’s important that even though there are common themes within the radio songs, they are all very different. The themes of love, money, or moving on are also representative of what many people in the Mojave Wasteland want.

In Fallout 3 and 4, the music has mostly songs of either love, death, or radiation. Even the some of the songs about love have radiation incorporated (Crawl Out Through the Fallout & Rocket 69). The radio playing in the post nuclear apocalypse are almost all about the thing that demised the world. I believe it boils down to something simple that I’ve seen discussed many times.

The East Coast can’t move on from the nuclear war. Even 200 years after the war, people in the Capital Wasteland and Commonwealth are living in dilapidated shacks and have ghouls living in their basement. The ‘successful’ towns are glorified shantytowns of thrown together metal, nestled inside pre war locations (Megaton, Rivet City, Diamond City). The music represents the people of Fallout 3 and 4; they can’t move on.

Fallout: New Vegas, on the other hand, has little to no music relating to death or radiation. The people in New Vegas have towns all over the map, have electricity and the NCR was working on building a railroad all the way around the Mojave. They have simply moved on from the war that happened over 200 years ago.

New Vegas has messages of letting go (Dead Money) and the theme of ‘Old World Blues’, meaning people are clinging onto the pre war past instead of moving on and rebuilding society. The people of the Mojave Wasteland have moved on and rose up, while the people of the East have Old World Blues

p-dots  asked:

I was wondering if you knew anything about the situation with Billy the Asian Elephant at the LA Zoo? I just received an email from the Zoo that a city council motion was filed to remove Billy from the zoo, and they're still trying to fight to keep him. A lot of people claim he appears stressed which is why there's been a big fight to get him moved. I don't really know a lot about elephants so I don't really know what side is best to take or what sources to take seriously (other than the Zoo).

I’ve been following the story of Billy pretty closely. I’m glad you asked - it’s the sort of thing I think is really important to talk about, because people need to understand what’s going on behind the nicely framed stories about animal activism you hear in the media, but I’m never sure how much of that sort of animal industry politics followers are interested in reading. 

The reason this specific instance is so important is because it’s a hell of a lot more complicated than ‘sanctuary vs zoo, which is better for the animals’. The decision to go after Billy - and only Billy, and only right now - looks to me like a really strategic political decision from the animal rights movement, and it falls in line with what I’ve been researching the history, evolution, and MO of the animal rights movement. As I’ve been learning more and more about how animal rights organizations and their partnered sanctuaries conquer and divide to achieve the change they want to see, a very specific pattern of action has started cropping up and this situation exemplifies how they’ve learned to use legislation, the legal system, and the good intentions of the general public to remove animals from zoos. This explanation is going to seem a little bit like jumping at shadows, but this method of petitioning cities to seize zoo animals as assets - and the really conveniently timed fallout that would result from their success - is textbook animal rights organization planning. 

So here’s what you need to know - if Billy is sent to a sanctuary, the LA Zoo would lose their AZA accreditation. They’d likely then be subject to the new wild animal performance law that’s got major support in LA right now, because only AZA institutions would likely have an automatic exemption. The combination of loss of accreditation, potential inability to do public education and outreach, and the ability of the AR groups to spin the situation as ‘AZA kicked them out for being abusive to their elephants’ would massively damage the viability of the zoo as an institution for the foreseeable future… at which point AR groups could easily petition the city to seize more animals from the collection and send them off to sanctuaries, because it’s now “well known” what a horrible institution the LA Zoo is. That would normalize the idea that animal rights organizations and city officials with no professional animal experience know more about animal welfare than the best zoological institutions in the country, and would set a scary precedent regarding what sorts of institutions the public will accept the animal rights organizations condemning and removing animals from. With that sort of potential fallout - and all of the pieces of the puzzle having been successful, individually, within the last decade or so in regards to other animal rights campaigns - this really is not about a single elephant at all. 


AZA has this one really important rule in their accreditation standards, and it boils down to: any zoo they accredit must be considered the experts and have final say over the care of their animals. If anyone external to a AZA accredited zoo overrules that zoo’s choice of care for their animals in any way, that zoo loses their AZA accreditation because they are no longer viewed as having ultimate control over the welfare of their charges. This is really important when it comes to elephants, as the Toronto Zoo lost their AZA accreditation over exactly this situation: animal rights activists caught wind of TZ’s plan to transfer their elephants to a facility in Florida where they’d live in a bigger herd, and petitioned the city council to send the elephants a the Performing Animals Welfare Sanctuary (the same one they want Billy to go to, which has a known history of uncontrolled tuberculosis infections on the property to this day). The Toronto Zoo is a municipal zoo - which means its animals were city property - and the city council chose to claim the elephants as assets, ignore the evidence of animals with active TB already living at the chosen facility, and then overruled the Toronto Zoo staff’s due diligence about what choice would provide the best welfare for their elephants and sent them away to PAWS. Having been overruled by the city council and having lost control of animals in their collection, the Toronto Zoo lost their AZA accreditation. (They later reapplied and were re-accredited). 

So, if the animal rights activists can convince the city council to claim Billy as an asset and remove him to PAWS, it would really damage the LA Zoo as an institution. Their credibility in the eyes of the public would be destroyed, they’d lose exemptions from federal legislation due to losing their AZA status; they’d be forced to pull out of multiple major SSPs (because only AZA institutions are allowed to house animals in the Green level programs, of which LA zoo has number); they’d likely lose grant funding. What’s more, the zoo would then be subject to the recent law banning the use of any exotic animal in “entertainment”in LA, because if has the same structure as similar legislation we’ve seen in other states, only AZA facilities get an exemption. If true, that would mean the zoo would no longer be able to do education and outreach programs with their animals (and this law was backed by PAWS, the organization that runs sanctuary they’re trying to send Billy to). 

There’s a very specific reason that this whole campaign centers on Billy, not all three elephants, which is part of what makes it so clear this is a campaign with an end goal of damaging the LA Zoo’s AZA accreditation. Billy’s two elderly companions, Jewel and Tina, would be far better candidates to be sent to a sanctuary if welfare is really the concern driving the advocacy. They’re rescues from a private owner who were massively underweight and had chronic medical conditions, and it’s not as important for them to stay within AZA’s management as other elephants because they’re too old to contribute to the Asian Elephant SSP. The LA zoo has previously been willing to send older elephants to the PAWS sanctuary without needing intervention from the city council (that story is discussed below), so why is this newer campaign ignoring the elderly females and bypassing the zoo entirely by going to the city council when their welfare would likely be more improved by that sort of move? Jewel and Tina don’t belong to the LA Zoo - they’re officially part of the San Diego Zoo collection and on loan to LA - which means the city council can’t claim them as assets and forcibly remove them. The only elephant at the LA zoo that the LA city council has the ability to control is Billy, and so it’s pretty clear this is about getting the city council to overrule the zoo’s choices in caring for their collection and not about which elephants would benefit most from leaving the zoo environment. 

This is an attempt by the animal rights industry to undermine the LA Zoo as an organization - that much is clear. Billy is just a convenient figurehead and an animal that the public will empathize with while being completely unaware of the the ulterior motives behind the advocacy effort. It comes at a delicate time, too, as the LA Zoo is currently in the process of developing a new master plan for the future of the facility. That’s a future that would be massively impacted by a loss of accreditation and all the potential fallout that would go along with it. 


So that’s the context to the Billy situation, and why people are fighting so hard on both sides of the issue. But what the public really cares about here isn’t the politics, it’s the animal welfare, so here’s a look at history and the welfare of the elephant at the center of all this furor. 

Billy at the LA Zoo. (Photo Credit: San Diego Blogs)

Billy is one of three elephants at the LA Zoo - he’s the youngest, at 32, and the only male. Billy is kept separated from his two elderly female companions, Jewel and Tina, because he’s young enough to still want to reproduce and would injure the elderly ladies if he tried to mount them. However, while the elephants are always separated by a barrier, the exhibit was designed with heavy-duty wire fences that meant the elephants could always be able to see, hear, and touch each other through it. The LA Zoo Asian elephant exhibit is one of the biggest elephant habitats in the United States at 6.5 acres (with almost four acres of yard space), and was opened in 2010 - the construction of a state-of-the-art habitat was part of the resolution from the first time animal rights activists demanded the elephants move to a PAWS sanctuary. 

In 2006, an elderly Asian elephant named Gita died at the LA Zoo. It’s not clear what led to her ending up in position she did, but she was found laying on her back legs with her front legs stretched in front of her. Nothing they did could entice her to stand back up, and she eventually died as her body weight crushed her own tissue and the toxins released during that process overloaded her kidneys. (While this sounds brutal, it’s worth keeping in mind that this is likely how many elderly large animals die if they lay down for the last time in a position that puts their weight on their own body). Animal rights activists had already been agitating for the LA Zoo’s elephants to be sent to a sanctuary, and they used Gita’s death as momentum to push for Billy and the other female housed there at the time, an african elephat named Ruby, to be transported to a sanctuary where it was claimed her welfare would be much higher than at the zoo. The LA Zoo eventually caved to public pressure and chose to send Ruby to PAWS (keeping their AZA accreditation by doing so voluntarily) where she was immediately housed with other animals without a proper quarantine period, exposed to animals who were TB positive and were not diagnosed until after death, and eventually died herself in 2011 from an unknown disease that looked suspiciously like TB (PAWS declined to send out samples for testing, despite what appeared to be physical symptoms observed during the necropsy). 

Gita at the LA zoo in 1999 in the old exhibit. ( Photo Credit: Al Seib / Los Angeles Times)

Billy remained at the LA Zoo after Ruby left, and the organization undertook a 42-million-dollar elephant exhibit renovation with the intention of bringing in another breeding male and a number of females as part of the Asian Elephant SSP. In 2007, local activists sued to halt construction of the exhibit with the goal of removing elephants from the LA zoo permanently and forcing Billy into a sanctuary - after a case that was drawn out for a number of years and repeatedly stalled exhibit construction, the judge assigned instead that the LA Zoo was allowed to continue exhibiting elephants but was required to exercise them frequently, make regular exhibit improvements such as tilling the soil, and banned the use of tools such as bullhooks and guides at the facility. When the new elephant exhibit opened in 2010, the LA zoo decided to put breeding plans for Billy on hold in order to house a pair of bonded female Asian elephants - Jewel and Tina - who had recently been removed from a private owner who had neglected their medical care. 

The three elephants share access to the large, heated elephant barn and have 24/7 access to five unique outdoor yards. Each yard has a substrate of soft sand that is tilled regularly to keep it from becoming compacted and hard - the shifting motion of the sand helps keeps the elephants in shape as they walk over it - and each yard has unique features like puzzle feeders, bathing pools and waterfalls. 

Browse and treats are placed at unique locations around all the yards each day, encouraging the elephants to explore their environment anew each morning. In addition, a comprehensive environmental enrichment program makes sure the elephants always have novel objects and stimuli to interact with and a daily training session (which the public is able to watch as a demonstration most days a week) keeps them mentally engaged by practicing foot care, grooming, practice for any veterinary behaviors that might be needed, as well as strength- and balance-focused exercises.

The AZA accreditation standards - which cover general animal policy in 34 pages, and use another 12 to cover animal interactions with the public or use in education programs - have dedicated 32 pages specifically to the regulations regarding elephant husbandry, training, nutrition, body condition, enrichment, and welfare assessments. As a large AZA-accredited zoo that frequently falls under the celebrity-studded, critical eye of the local populace, it’s inconceivable that Billy’s care (and that of Tina and Jewel) is not in accordance with these highly detailed requirements. 

Photos of the new LA Zoo elephant exhibit. (Photo credits: The Portico Group).

The LA Zoo’s elephant exhibit, finished in 2010, was designed by The Portico Group, a design firm founded in Seattle, WA in 1990. The Portico Group’s exhibit designs consistently awards every year within the industry for their incorporation of the newest animal welfare science and management technologies as well as educational and interpretive options. Their design for the LA Zoo is on par with the quality of the rest of their designs, and features a similar amount of yard space for the elephants as the design they created for the widely-praised Cheyenne Mountain Zoo’s Africa expansion that opened in 2013. 

Billy in his habitat at the LA Zoo. (Photo Credit: AP Photo/Richard Vogel)


One of the biggest reasons people express a concern for Billy is a head-bobbing behavior he’s been known to perform his entire tenure at the LA Zoo. The public is aware that repetitive behaviors (called stereotypies) can be signs of low quality welfare, and often worry that means that Billy isn’t being well taken care of at the zoo. However, one thing that isn’t commonly known about sterotypical behaviors is that once developed, they rarely go away once the animal is in a better welfare situation - which leads guests to often misunderstand an animal’s behavior as it relates to their current care. 

The LA Zoo has studied Billy’s head bobbing behavior over the years, and concluded that it appears to be an anticipatory behavior rather than one brought on by stress, as it mainly occurs when the elephant is awaiting the arrival of food, expecting a keeper interaction, or getting ready for movement into another area of his habitat. They also found that Billy had been noted to be displaying the head bobbing behavior when he came to the zoo at age 4 and that it was not something not something he developed during his life at the facility. 

Just because the behavior doesn’t mean that Billy has low welfare in his situation at the LA Zoo doesn’t mean the staff just want to leave him to bob and sway: to help decrease the amount of head-bobbing Billy does and engage him in a range of other behaviors, the keeper staff change their husbandry routine slightly each day and provide enrichment at different times in order to keep him investigating his environment instead of standing and waiting for regular occurrences. 


At the end of the day, Billy’s welfare does not appear to be the impetus pushing this current furor around “rescuing him” - he’s a convenient figurehead for what appears to be a well-coordinated attempt to undercut the LA Zoo’s credibility and accreditation status. 

But even though the actual welfare of the elephant is irrelevant to the organizations pushing this agenda, the general public is now very invested in understanding Billy’s welfare in regards to the outcome of this situation. 

The sanctuary animal rights activists are recommending Billy be sent to has multiple issues with basic elephant husbandry and medical treatment. PAWS was unable to evacuate their elephants in when threatened by a massive wildfire in 2015, due to their policy against doing even the most basic husbandry training with their animals that would have allowed them to be walked into a trailer or crated for transport. Instead, the animals were sheltered on site as the fire came within a few miles of the facility, putting them through massive amounts of stress and resulting in probable smoke inhalation. PAWS frequently take in animals that are reported as healthy upon transport, only to report having to euthanize them within a few years due to crippling chronic conditions. Most concerning is that PAWS appears to be plagued by frequent tuberculosis outbreaks among their elephants, potentially with multiple strains of the disease, despite their stated adherence to biosafety protocols -and that they have had at least one animal die while sick with active, contagious TB infections that were only discovered post-mortem. 

Billy is currently housed in a modern elephant habitat that was created in accordance with best practices for elephant management by outstanding architects - a remodel that was done specifically in response to the original welfare concerns about LA Zoo’s elephants in the late 2000′s. He has access to state-of-the-art veterinary medicine and is cared for by a dedicated team keepers who practice medical treatment behaviors, like foot care, with him daily to ensure that he can quickly receive treatment in a stress-free setting if it becomes necessary in the future. LA Zoo’s elephant keepers work hard to keep Billy active, mentally stimulated, and make sure he has plenty of positive social interactions with both the human and elephant members of his herd. 

If the goal of the general public is Billy’s welfare, he is far better off in a habitat designed for him to inhabit with the staff he has known for a better part of two decades than being sent across the country to a facility with massive red flags in their elephant management program just to fulfill a political movement’s agenda of damaging the facility that holds him. 


Citations under the cut. 

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anonymous asked:

I’m not trying to be inflammatory, I’m just curious. How do het ace/aro people face SYSTEMATIC oppression? Gay/bi/trans people face oppression like difficultly adopting children, finding housing, they may be fired from employment because of their gender or orientation. So they are bared from normal parts of live because of their gender/sexuality. Gay ace/aro people face this too, but what do het ace/aro people experience on a societal level?

If you’d been following my blog at all or even bothered to peruse it a little before dropping this message in my inbox, you’d probably already know the answer to your question. 

You’d ALSO probably know that there are bi and pan aspecs too (e.g., I’m panromantic demisexual) which isn’t “gay” (does this term also include lesbians?) so I feel like your ask erases part of my own identity and that of others in the community.

For these reasons and more, I’d bet money that you’re not here because you’re “curious”. You’re probably here because you figure this is how you’re gonna stop a “self-imposing” aspec from speaking up for herself. 

Well guess what: That’s just hateful & sad.

Regardless though of your intentions, I’m here to say that there is in fact SYSTEMATIC oppression against aspecs. For example, Dr Gordon Hodson wrote this about his 2012 study: 

In a recent investigation (MacInnis & Hodson, in press) we uncovered strikingly strong bias against asexuals in both university and community samples. Relative to heterosexuals, and even relative to homosexuals and bisexuals, heterosexuals: (a) expressed more negative attitudes toward asexuals (i.e., prejudice); (b) desired less contact with asexuals; and © were less willing to rent an apartment to (or hire) an asexual applicant (i.e., discrimination). Moreover, of all the sexual minority groups studied, asexuals were the most dehumanized (i.e., represented as “less human”). Intriguingly, heterosexuals dehumanized asexuals in two ways. Given their lack of sexual interest, widely considered a universal interest, it might not surprise you to learn that asexuals were characterized as “machine-like” (i.e., mechanistically dehumanized). But, oddly enough, asexuals were also seen as “animal-like” (i.e., animalistically dehumanized). Yes, asexuals were seen as relatively cold and emotionless and unrestrained, impulsive, and less sophisticated.

When you repeatedly observe such findings it grabs your attention as a prejudice researcher. But let’s go back a minute and consider those discrimination effects. Really? You’d not rent an apartment to an asexual man, or hire an asexual woman? Even if you relied on stereotypes alone, presumably such people would make ideal tenants and employees. We pondered whether this bias actually represents bias against single people, a recently uncovered and very real bias in its own right (see Psychology Today column by Bella DePaulo). But our statistical analyses ruled out this this possibility. So what’s going on here?

If you’ve been following my column, you’ll recall that I wrote a recent article on what I called the “Bigotry Bigot-Tree” – what psychologists refer to as generalized prejudice. Specifically, those disliking one social group (e.g., women) also tend to dislike other social groups (e.g., homosexuals; Asians). In our recent paper (MacInnis & Hodson, in press), we found that those who disliked homosexuals also disliked bisexuals and asexuals. In other words, these prejudices are correlated. Heterosexuals who dislike one sexual minority, therefore, also dislike other sexual minorities, even though some of these groups are characterized by their sexual interest and activity and others by their lack of sexual interest and activity.

This anti-asexual bias, at its core, seems to boil down to what Herek (2010) refers to as the “differences as deficit” model of sexual orientation. By deviating from the typical, average, or normal sexual interests, sexual minorities are considered substandard and thus easy targets for disdain and prejudice. Contrary to conventional folk wisdom, prejudice against sexual minorities may not therefore have much to do with sexual activity at all. There is even evidence, for instance, that religious fundamentalists are prejudiced against homosexuals even when they are celibate (Fulton et al., 1999). Together, such findings point to a bias against “others”, especially different others, who are seen as substandard and deficient (and literally “less human”). “Group X” is targeted for its lack of sexual interest even more than homosexuals and bisexuals are targeted for their same-sex interests.

From news coverage of a recently published study (2016):

What should the average person take away from your study?

Since I first became interested in the issue, I have come to conclude that U.S. society is both “sex negative” and “sex positive.” In other words, there is stigma and marginalization that can come both from being “too sexual” and from being “not sexual enough.” In a theoretical paper, I argued that sexuality may be compulsory in contemporary U.S. society. In other words, our society assumes that (almost) everyone is, at their core, “sexual” and there exists a great deal of social pressure to experience sexual desire, engage in sexual activities, and adopt a sexual identity. At the same time, various types of “non-sexuality” (such as a lack of sexual desire or activity) are stigmatized.

For this particular study, I identified thirty individuals who identified as asexual and asked them first, if they had experienced stigma or marginalization as a result of their asexuality, and, second how they challenged this stigma or marginalization. I found that my interviewees had experienced the following forms of marginalization: pathologization (i.e. people calling them sick), social isolation, unwanted sex and relationship conflict, and the denial of epistemic authority (i.e. people not believing that they didn’t experience sexual attraction). I also found that my interviews resisted stigma and marginalization in five ways: describing asexuality as simply a different (but not inherently worse) form of sexuality; deemphasizing the importance of sexuality in human life; developing new types of nonsexual relationships; coming to see asexuality as a sexual orientation or identity; and engaging in community building and outreach.

I hope that average people would take away from this study the idea that some people can lead fulfilling lives without experiencing sexual attraction but can experience distress if others try to invalidate their identities.

Some of the social isolation we aspecs experience comes from religious communities. Indeed, the popular myth that religious people revere aspecs is very much NOT TRUE. For example, read “Myth 8″ from the VISION Catholic Religious Vocation Guide:

MYTH 8: Religious are asexual

Question: What do you call a person who is asexual? 

Answer: Not a person. Asexual people do not exist. Sexuality is a gift from God and thus a fundamental part of our human identity. Those who repress their sexuality are not living as God created them to be: fully alive and well. As such, they’re most likely unhappy.

All people are called by God to live chastely, meaning being respectful of the gift of their sexuality. Religious men and women vow celibate chastity, which means they live out their sexuality without engaging in sexual behavior. A vow of chastity does not mean one represses his manhood or her womanhood. Sexuality and the act of sex are two very different things. While people in religious life abstain from the act of sex, they do not become asexual beings, but rather need to be in touch with what it means to be a man or a woman. A vow of chastity also does not mean one will not have close, loving relationships with women and men. In fact, such relationships are a sign of living the vow in a healthy way. Living a religious vow of chastity is not always easy, but it can be a very beautiful expression of love for God and others.

Religious women and men aren’t oddities; they mirror the rest of the church they serve: there are introverts and extroverts, tall and short, old and young, straight and gay, obese and skinny, crass and pious, humorous and serious, and everything in between. They attempt to live the same primary vocation as all other Christians do: proclaiming and living the gospel. However, religious do this as members of an order that serve the church and world in a particular way. Like marriage and the single life, religious life can be wonderful, fulfilling, exciting, and, yes, normal. Yet, it also can be countercultural and positively challenging. It’s that for us and many others.

If you thought religious life was outdated, dysfunctional, or dead, we hope you can now look beyond the stereotypes and see the gift it is to the church and world.

NOTE: YOU CAN BE A GAY CATHOLIC PERSON BUT NOT ASEXUAL, BC ASEXUALITY DOESN’T EXIST (yet somehow we’re also “most likely unhappy” and “oddities”). I sincerely hope and believe that not all religions characterize us aspecs this way. But here are some personal accounts I found on a reddit site answering the question “Do any religions have a negative stance toward asexuals?”:

Please note that the Christian pastor in the last example was fearful (or something?) that an asexual was helping to lead a youth group and kicked them out of the church as a result.

You know what trend I really fuckin’ hate?

This whole new trend of labeling people by their races disguised as positivity. And I’m not talking about celebrating the accomplishments of someone despite racial discrimination. I’m taking about the posts that go ‘Look at this black girl who did a thing! And she’s black! Black is beautiful! No one will ever talk about this!’. The unnecessary comments on posts of beautiful women or successful people, 'Black don’t crack. Glorious melanin! Black bitches getting shit done!’ and the incessant adding of political agendas to normal posts.

You see pictures of beautiful successful women and the comments are all about how that person is black. You see a man who has done something breaking in science and the comments are all about how he’s black and that black people can do things too and black lives matter, etc. etc. etc. People reblog post after post boiling down successful people to the fact that they’re black. Not that they’re smart, or beautiful, or talented, that they’re black. They aren’t beautiful because they have great complexion, or mesmerizing eyes, or beautiful hair, they’re beautiful because they’re black. That’s the only remarkable quality about them.

No one is even allowed to have any sort of accomplishment without it being some sort of political statement. No one talks about what makes them special. No one talks about the things that they’ve done. Everyone just marvels at the fact that they did that while being black. They were smart and black. Pretty and black. Successful even though they were black.

It’s not even defying stereotypes anymore, it’s feeding into them. It’s almost become a stereotype on its own. It’s saying 'wow this person did something great despite not being white!’. It’s saying that being black is a handicap and celebrating anything black people do as extraordinary because they overcame this handicap instead of the fact that they did something genuinely amazing.

It’s not positivity. It’s not proving that racists and stereotypes are wrong. It’s not really even celebrating that person. It’s celebrating the fact that they did something that’ll prove you right. It’s loving other people because of your political agenda. Because they’re important to your opinion. Because they prove a point. Not because of any kindness of the heart. It’s not positivity and black people, or any race for that matter, are not to be your pawns. People are not to be appreciated because of what they do for you, but because of what they do for humanity and for what they do for themselves.

Why Use Image Descriptions ?

There are many reasons and they all boil down to accessibility for everyone. It’s massively helpful for those of us who are disabled, and has the added benefit of being helpful for those who aren’t.

- Allows screen readers and verbal descriptions for the blind and visually impaired.

- Transcripts of videos that allow the deaf, hard of hearing, or those with audio processing problems to follow along by reading rather than or in conjunction with listening.

- Lets people know what the picture/screencap/video/gif is if it does not load or are on limited internet.

- Helps those with visual processing issues process the image.

- Gives autistics and people with problems reading facial expressions,emotions, and other non-verbal cues a helpful way to tell what’s going on in the picture/video/gif.

- Typed transcripts are often easier to read than screenshots (which are sometimes impossible to read).

- Audio transcripts are useful for people who can’t play sound from their device.

- Allows for blacklisting software to work more effectively. If an image description is included for a gif, picture, or screenshot then the words are already included in the body of the post and it is more likely to be screened by the software for people who need it.

2

The novel The Last Train From Hiroshima by Charles Pellegrino had a few passage that describe the untimely demise of one Mrs. Aoyama, who had the unfortunate distinction of being directly below the bomb as it detonated over the city of Hiroshima.

“After only one-hundred-millionth of a second, the core (of the bomb) began to expand and the fission reaction began to run down. During this nanosecond interval, the first burst of light emerged with such intensity that even the green and yellow portions of the spectrum could be seen shining through the bomb’s steel casing as if it were a bag of transparent cellophane. Directly below, Mrs. Aoyama was still alive and completely untouched by the flash. After one ten-thousandth of a second, the air began absorbing the burst and responding to it. Under the hypocenter (of the expanding neutron field created by the bomb’s detonation), the blood in Mrs. Aoyama’s brain was already beginning to vibrate, on the verge of flashing to vapor. What she experienced was one of the fastest deaths in all human history. Before a single nerve could begin to sense pain, she and her nerves ceased to be.

   "Unlike the man leading a horse across the nearby "T” Bridge, Mrs. Aoyama could not possibly leave a permanent shadow on the ground. From the moment the rays began to pass through her bones, her marrow would begin vibrating at more than five times the boiling point of water. The bones themselves would become instantly incandescent, with all of her flesh trying simultaneously to explode away from her skeleton while being forced straight down into the ground as a compressed gas. Within the first three-tenths of a second following the bomb’s detonation, most of the iron was going to be separated from Mrs. Aoyama’s blood, as if by an atomic refinery.“

I think one of the things that makes Azula so amazing as a villain and a character is that her breakdown is foreshadowed by her earliest episodes. All the pieces are on the board at the very start, you just don’t realize it. So when the breakdown comes it’s all full of callbacks to earlier behavior and it suddenly feels utterly natural that this person you’ve seen as a nigh-untouchable badass mastermind is coming so undone. It doesn’t come out of nowhere, it was there all along from the very start and we simply forgot about it in the interim because she was being so badass and it had no reason to take effect just yet.

–Her speech to the captain about the tides foreshadows her banishing all her servants and advisors. The captain is totally honest with her despite being scared, that they’re not bringing the ship in just yet because of an issue with the tides. Tides are BIG deal in regards to bringing in a ship but Azula doesn’t care and simply wants her will done now and makes it clear she will harm or kill the captain if he doesn’t do the thing he knows is a bad idea. The man is not delaying for silly reasons or to hide a mistake, he is genuinely making a sound decision about how to bring a ship into port, Azula simply doesn’t care she wants what she wants done now and treats disagreement as disloyalty. Azula perceives anyone subordinate as not doing what she wants for any reason at all to be proof they’re not perfectly loyal.

–The one hair out of place with Lo and Li training her. It shows Azula as a perfectionist, and again, as a control freak. She cares about appearences, which probably ties into her status as a prodigy who has long been praised for being such. She needs to make it look effortless and perfect. But after Boiling Rock this starts to slide. In The Southern Raiders he hair comes down fully during her fight with Zuko and she doesn’t even care–hell, she can’t do anything to fix it since she needs her hand to hang onto the mountain. Then in the finale her hair is an utter disaster, showing just how far she’s fallen. Once again it fully comes down while she’s fighting, and by the time the fight is over and Katara has her restrained she’s a total mess.

–Recruiting Ty Lee. This is where we should have known from the start that Ty Lee’s loyalty to Azula is not absolute by any means. Ty Lee wanted to stay with the circus and only left because of Azula clearly threatening her by having the net set on fire. We see it again in Zuko Alone’s flashbacks, where Azula is obviously jealous of Ty Lee being able to do better gymnastics than her and bullies her for it. Ty Lee is only with Azula out of fear and always has been. Of course if it came down to Azula or Mai she’d choose Mai.

–Recruiting Mai. It’s even more subtle than with Ty Lee but they show why Mai will eventually betray Azula in the same episode Mai debuts in. When Tom-Tom, Mai’s little brother, is in danger and a hostage, Azula makes it clear she doesn’t give a shit about that and that the deal should be off Mai’s not as open as Ty Lee is so she doesn’t seem to react as much but it’s the same situation. Azula wants Mai on her team and doesn’t care what happens to people Mai probably cares about. Thing is, the person Mai cares about most is Zuko, who Azula is hunting. Mai betraying Azula for Zuko becomes more and more of a given as the show establishes Mai’s feelings for him. Meanwhile Azula probably assumed that if Mai was willing to endanger her own little brother for Azula, there would be no conflicts of loyalty regarding Zuko…and was wrong. As Mai said, she miscalculated.

It was all there right from the start of season 2.

epiphany | jungkook

Pairing: Jungkook + Reader 

Genre: Fluff + college au 

Word Count: 3.6k 

Part: | 1 | 2 |  

Summary: You hated his guts, especially after he ruined your chance at getting a good grade in one of your toughest classes. But why did your heart beat a little faster every time you saw him? And why did he feel the same way?

Reader’s POV

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to give you a failing grade, Y/N…” Mr.Ransford frowned,“ You should’ve saved your work somewhere separately you know?”

You gaped at him in complete shock, as everything came crashing down on you.

“B-but you don’t understand! It wasn’t my fault-” you stammered, your hands flailing around in a frenzy as you attempted to explain your dire situation to your psychology professor.

“Y/N, I’m sorry I’m afraid we can’t discuss this right now, I have a class in 2 minutes. We’ll talk later, hm?” he said as you sighed, your shoulders slumping in utter defeat.

He patted your shoulders in sympathy as you walked out of the door, tears welling up in your eyes as you thought of all your hard work that was now flushed down the drain. All because of one boy.

That damn Jeon Jungkook.

—-

“YAH!” you yelled, raging, as you approached the boys, a deadly glare in your eyes as you grabbed Jungkook by the collar of his tshirt. Pulling him up from the bleachers where him and the rest of his friends were sitting, all of them gasped, mouths going agape as they witnessed their golden maknae get manhandled by you.

“Y/N~What a pleasure,” Jungkook said, giving you a lazy smirk.

Your blood boiled at the audacity the boy had, to address you in such a way, after he had destroyed your chance at a good grade- heck a good year of college. Without thinking first, you lifted your hand and slapped him across the face, the contact shooting vibrations of pain down your arm as the noise echoed in the air. Immediate silence followed, everyone looking at the two of you with rounded eyes as Jungkook himself, was in shock.

You stood there, your chest rising up and down, breathing heavy as you glowered at him. His hands flew to his cheek as he let out a stream of curse words, his gaze landing on yours, fire kindling in his eyes as he reddened in embarrassment.

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junebuggu  asked:

i... dont get all of this, really. the mcelroys have repeatedly explained that the graphic novel is NOT canon for the character's designs, and taako is literally blue because he is a magical elf? it was not made with antisemetic connotations, and not only that, but when was it ever stated that taako should be jewish. or mexican! in fact if they made them any type of hispanic people would get even angrier because of the names. why can't people just enjoy things?

cool! i’m happy to explain.

firstly, taako (named after tacos) who is on the quest to create the taco (established in here there be gerblins but not left there!) should be, or rather, better be, or rather, is mexican because if not, they are using a culture as a joke. that’s not alright! unless he is mexican, it doesn’t make sense for him to invent mexican food or have the name ‘taako taaco’

also, just so we’re clear: taako is a sun elf! they have “bronze-colored skin and hair most often of copper, golden blond, and black”. having him be green - or blue, or purple, or whatever - doesn’t make sense. 

anyway, to the point of “people would get even angrier because of the names’ - why don’t we try actually asking these people who would apparently hate it even more? here’s one response, and here’s another. heck, here’s another. people wouldn’t get ‘more mad’ at all, because he’s not treated like a stereotype. here’s the thing, we shouldn’t assume. no one should just Assume that people are gonna hate a thing before they do it, especially in regards to like… representation. like that’s not their problem, it’s yours for not just asking them. 

so, why can’t people just enjoy things? well, the adventure zone presented and continues to present itself as something that tries to do right by its fans, especially in the representation department. i wrote a thing about it here, at least in regards to race, but the basic thing i’d like people to take away from it is this paragraph

Saying ‘there’s no canon design’ for a character means nothing when the graphic novel, the merchandise, the posters, the zine - these all feature white designs. You can’t say you care about representation - how important it is to you - when you don’t represent anyone. You can’t say you accept all designs when the only ones that seem to be accepted all look the same. You can’t say there is no default when white is the default.

on twitter, @fraanziawhine made some really good points about how the representation in taz, like, works. and it’s not great. the mcelroys get praised for being empathetic, for being kind, but while i believe they try, they don’t ask for help with things they don’t know about - how to do race and lgbt rep for instance - and they do it wrong.

and you know what? it boils down to this: why are they more willing to make someone green than to make them brown? 

fans of colour continually talk about why this is important, how to do better by us - and we do it well. regardless if we are ‘polite’ (spoon-feeding) or ‘angry’ (you know, like, the emotional humans that we are) we have repeatedly tried to get through to the mcelroys and say ‘hey, you might want to do this, if you’re so interested in doing it’.

taz celebrates its ability to bring all kinds of people together. however, it kind of seems like only a few kind of people are welcome.

The key to love, my father told me, was to never love someone more than they love you. So when, after dating for five months, Christopher Moore was the first to say “I Love You”, I thought I had hit the “Love Jackpot”. I say this because, prior to him saying it at that very moment, I had never given thought to the possibility that I could love him in return. Standing in front of my apartment building, nervous and excited, facing him and his smile, I questioned whether love was the word to describe what I was feeling. High school love, after all, is quite trivial with it’s ins and outs. Nevertheless after weighing the theoretical pros and cons of love, I decided that I was in love, at least in some respects. He was handsome, smart, sweet, and I enjoyed his company. This is what I believed love boiled down to; four factors. Honesty, clearly, was something I overlooked. About a year and 7 months into our blissful love affair, after graduation had passed and we had spent the summer taking all the cliché couple pictures, Chris decided that he “just couldn’t go on lying to me anymore. “Jenine” he told me “this guilt is eating me alive!”. I imagine there wasn’t much of him left, as it had been “eating away at him” for 6 months. This is when I learned that there is no “key” to love; no guide, no tips, no 101 course, because love is lived and learned; never taught. Try as you may, to forgo the pain of love, you’ll find joy in knowing that it’s survive-able and moreover, sometimes the good outweighs the bad. No, Chris wasn’t the love of my life, but he gave life to my ability to love.

“Never” my father said “let love override your faculty of reason.” Easier said, than done. My next love was Jeremy Bishop. Before you ask, of course there were others between Chris and Jeremy. But this is a story about love; not “almost loves”,“semi loves”, and “could’ve beens”. Jeremy’s love was the worst kind of love. The kind that doesn’t have a reason to exist but somehow it does and you’re glad. Its sole purpose is to debilitate your mind, forcing you to follow only your emotions. While Jeremy was dreamy, I learned that the man of your dreams can sometimes be the root of your nightmares.

I met Jeremy my junior year at _________ University. It was a Sunday and I had been studying in the library for an anthropology midterm and decided that I would take a break. Putting my highlighter down & flexing my hand I stood up & headed towards the bathroom. As I walked through the stacks, passing my hand across the rows of books I’d never read, my friend Denise spotted me and waved me over. Walking swiftly I made my way to the table she was stationed it & gathered that she had been studying all day as all. Splayed papers, open textbooks, two highlighters, & her laptop with several window open screamed “cram session” to me. After having sat & talked for some time about school & it’s “scammagry”, I noticed that someone had taken a seat at the end of the table. You know those typical movies where two people look up at the same time & smile coyly at one another? Well that’s what happened with us…….minus the smiling. When Jeremy & I caught eyes it was more of an inquisitive stare down. I relented because who really stares at a stranger for lengths at a time? Apparently Jeremy does because every time I looked up he was looking at me or perhaps through me. Whatever the case was I asked Denise if she could “Excuse me for one second?” as I got up from my seat and sauntered over to Jeremy, running my fingernails along the wooden table that both separated and joined us.

He was brown skinned but it was a rich brown that I often found myself lost in. He had brown hair that was cut low to avoid maintenance & also to spite his mother who so much loved it longer. His eyes were almost black they were so dark, yet you never asked someone to hit the lights when staring into them. He had a slight dimple on the right side of face that only presented itself in the presence of his mother, its creator.

“I know you or something?” I said, to which he looked up & responded “No you don’t. But since you’re already here, I’m Jeremy. Nice to meet you….” he said moving his hand in that circular waiting motion “this is usually the part where you tell me your name”. He was sarcastic & forthcoming and I liked it. “This is usually the part when I’d say Jenine. My name is Jenine. Though I’m not sure it’s nice to meet you.” “Well Jenine, do you have HIST 256 on Mondays & Thursdays? I think that’s where I’ve seen you before.” “Well Jeremy, had I known you were a stalker I would’ve stayed at the other end of the table” “A stalker Jenine? Really? I think you’re mistaking my keen eye for details.” “I stand corrected then. I just had no idea I was noticeable to your "keen eye”, I said, making air quotes. He leaned in & said, “Maybe Jenine, just maybe there’s a lot of things you don’t know. I’d be happy to fill you in though. If you were ever free.” “Correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems to me, Jeremy, that you’re asking me out.” “It seems that way, because it is that way. But enough with this, would you be interested in going out?” “I’ll contemplate it.”

A week later Jeremy picked me up in his beat up silver 2010 Toyota Corolla. Got out & offered to close the door for me not because he was a gentleman but because I literally couldn’t close it myself. He told me he wanted to show me his favorite place in all of Brooklyn. We drove for about 15 mins and parked in DUMBO; my favorite place. As we walked to the pier he barraged me with every menial question from favorite color to top five movies. I stopped his questioning because I realized I knew nothing about him. “What about you?” I said. “Tell me something I don’t know about you.” “I’m a Taurus. Now back to you.” “Your sign. You gave me the third degree and in return you tell me your astrological sign??” “I’m really not that interesting. I kind of just go with the flow nothing special really.” “I could say the same about myself but you don’t see me spewing monotonous facts about myself” “That’s just it though. You’re very interesting. I see you twice a week & you never look the same to me. Always a different hairstyle, new lipstick, different outfit. You keep me guessing & well…I like that.” “Different outfit…Did you expect me to have the same clothes on like a cartoon character?”

Jeremy took my clothes off the way he took down my walls; slowly & intently. I never felt exposed or vulnerable. It was easy with him & who doesn’t like easy? The first time we had sex he kissed every scar and stretch mark on my body while he whispered beautiful and for the first time I believed it. This is when I knew I loved him; this is when I knew he loved me. We fell into a routine & inevitably, that’s how we fell apart. We saw each other four-five times a week in between work, school & our respective friends. I’d meet him after work or he’d meet me after class, we’d get some food or I’d cook, we’d talk, then go back to his dorm room or my house & somewhere in between there we’d fuck once or twice & that would be that. Talk, Eat, Fuck, Repeat. This, I should inform you, was the foundation for our dismantling. Jeremy grew tired of our monotony, I suppose, & because of that he started talking to a female customer who had “just so happened” to frequent his job. In talking they “just so happened” to find they had “so much in common” & somehow Jeremy’s dick “just so happened” to be in her mouth when I walked into his dorm room to get the spare phone charger I left there just in case. “Oh Mahh Gahhhh” is what Celeste said with his dick slighty tucked to the left side of her mouth because it wouldn’t have been polite to pull it out all together; though I’m sure there was no God she could ever call her own. Startled yet surprisingly indifferent I found my charger in the first drawer of his night stand now decoratively arrayed with ripped condom wrappers and I closed the door behind me.

Walking out of the apartment I didn’t feel anything but when I reached the stairs it hit me and when Jeremy came running out of his room, pulling his boxers up I looked up at him from the top stair I was sitting on & hit him right in the groin. “Shit! Ahh! Damn, J! Come on!” he winced . “Come on?? Excuse me?!? You’re such a fucking dickhead. Like what the fuck?” “I know. I know. I’m sorry babe. You gotta believe me! I swear it’ll never happen again.” & that’s what I wanted to believe after all; that this was just a bump along our road; that we could get through this because we could get through anything. So when Jeremy crouched down in front of me, put his hand under my chin, looked me right in the eye and told me he was “so sorry”, that he “really loved me”, that he was “mad stupid for doing that” I believed him & gave us another chance because I wasn’t ready to admit failure.

Celeste Soto was the average full figured broad who just “couldn’t help” falling for other women’s boyfriends, husbands, fiancés, you name it. Walking back into his room, I found her putting her left shoe on with one hand on his desk for balance. “You gotta believe mama” she said “I didn’t know he even had a girl. You feel me? I wouldn’t have done anything with him. Thas crazy disrespectful. My bad.” as she adjusted her bra strap and pulled her hair into a messy bun. Turning slighty towards Jeremy, I looked at him as if to say “really?!? THIS was the best you could do??” and he lowered his head, and stared at this one spot on the carpet that he could never get out. Not only had Jeremy cheated but he chose the lowest of women to do it with. “First of all, I’m not one of your friends so I don’t know why you’re calling me "mama” & no I don’t “feel” you nor do I intend to. Get your shit and get out!“ When she was gone I searched the apartment for remnants of her presence, prior to that days visit. An earring, a hair tie, maybe a lip balm. I found nothing or maybe I wasn’t really looking.

For eight months straight Jeremy was on his BEST behavior. He’d let me know where he was at all times as to ensure that he wasn’t out cheating; send pictures as proof on some occasions. I have to admit, though I was secure in his whereabouts, I was also sure that this was not how healthy relationships works. Nevertheless I looked forward to each notification because afterall "once a cheater……"you know the rest. One night I went over to his place to cook dinner, partially to ensure he wouldn’t be feeding Celeste or any other girl his penis but also because this is what I missed most about us. I had become so preoccupied with deciding whether or not I could trust him that I wasn’t concerned with trying to make us seem normal. After dinner we were in his bed tearing at each other’s clothes & after switching positions five times he looked down at me & said "I can’t do this”. Looking back at him I said “it’s cool I wasn’t feeling it either honestly”. “Not this” he said falling to my side, facing the ceiling “I mean like this….us”. Somehow though I knew that was what he had meant. This ball of something akin to both fear & anger welled up in my throat & grew until finally all I could say was “oh”. One tear fell from my eye & couldn’t allow myself to shed another. “This whole time” he said getting up from the bed “I wasn’t with you because I wanted to be. I was with you because I didn’t want to let you down.” He was pacing back & front at the foot of the bed, lifting his hands to his head then retracting them, looking over at me occasionally for assurance of my understanding. So he continued "I couldn’t let your last image of me be somebody who betrayed you. I had to prove you wrong & that’s selfish. I’m sorry. I don’t want to be in a relationship I’m not fully committed to. It isn’t fair to either of us J & you can hate me but I’d rather you hate me for being honest.” “Is this a joke? Please tell me you’re kidding right now” I said, half laughing half crying. “Let me get this straight” I said, sitting upright in his bed, pulling my shirt over my head “You cheated…..You lied…..YOU fucked up….You begged for another chance!…and my stupid ass gave you one. I’m just so lost right now.” This is when I realized I never should have sat on those steps & cried. I should’ve ran out of that building like it was on fire because guys like him will always burn you.

Some nights I could still hear his footsteps pacing the floor & I’d wonder when in the hell it would be over. When I’d stop crying; when I’d realize I was better off without him. But there’s this moment & I know it sounds cliche but you just wake up & you feel different you feel like you can begin again. One morning I woke up and knew Jeremy would never have a hold on me the way he did before, but more importantly I didn’t want him to.

The thing about baggage is that you never realize how much of it you carry around. In fact you assume that more often than not you don’t carry any at all because you’re “over it” or you’ve “moved on”. You’ll find yourself compromising because you just want someone to call at night; that wants only you. “Trust me.” my mother said “There will be others and don’t think that you have to look for them or that you have to settle.” My mother had a way with words. I’m not sure if that’s necessarily a good thing but the fact remains that when she said those words to me I wished she had kept her opinion to herself. I would never settle…..or at least I didn’t think I would.

I knew I didn’t love Benjamin the first time he came inside me & I wished I had never come to his apartment, let alone into his room splayed with dirty laundry that he was “gonna get to”. More importantly I knew I couldn’t love Benjamin, not the way I wanted to at least, when he told me I’m just like my mother. This sounds stupid I know, but let me explain.

After a week of working overtime, my best friend Selene dragged me out of my apartment for a night of bar hopping. Upon walking into our third stop, Benjamin grabbed my hand & told me I was pretty. That was it. There was no drawn out conversation, no playing hard to get, it was very low stakes. I gave him my number & before I got to the next bar he had called & asked when he could see me again. “Tomorrow” I said.

The next evening Benjamin showed up at my apartment with no plan other than to show up. We decided to see a movie.

The movie we saw doesn’t matter. Neither does the fact that we went to the movies. What matters is that after we left the movies, Benjamin grabbed both my hands & kissed me. When he stopped & I looked up at him he said “You taste like stale popcorn”. I thought “what the fuck?” & then he reminded me that we shared a popcorn. Our entirely relationship was like this; constant reminders of things I should have been aware of.

Ben was different from Jeremy because he never lied to me. That doesn’t necessarily mean that’s a good thing though. His honesty was one that I had to grow accustomed to. We had been dating for about two months, when I called him asking if he wanted to get dinner later & he simply replied “no”. No explanation, no rain check, no apology; he just hung up. Later he’d text me & say that we should get breakfast instead the next day because he liked being the first person I talked to in the morning. He never hid anything from me. Girls would text him, telling him how much they “missed him” how much “fun” they used to have & he’d show me his phone while laughing & ask what I thought he should say in his reply. It was almost inconceivable, how much he included me in his decisions when it came to other women. Co-workers would invite him out to dinner & drinks after work, over to their apartments, concerts & he would ask me, not if he could go (because he was going to do what he wanted regardless) or if I wanted to come with, but how I’d feel if he went it with them. We’d be waiting for our heart rates to drop back to normal after sex; our skin still dewy and tingling and he’d say “the last time was better” or “you faked it, but that’s cool” as he got up and ambled to the bathroom & I’d wonder if he had to be so honest with me all the time.

I woke up one day to him sitting at my kitchen table in just some sweatpants, signing a card. Next to him there was a huge bouquet of sunflowers. I walked over to him, fixing my bed hair into a bed bun & when I sat down he was startled. “I didn’t think you’d be up this early” he said & I looked over at the clock on microwave. “It’s after 11……does that even count as early?” I said. He looked up at me, then at the clock, then back at me & shrugged “I guess not”. I asked “Who’s the card for?” & as he sealed it, he handed to me & said “Happy Anniversary Sweetness” with no inflection. My face dropped to the floor, along with the card. “An anniversary?” I thought “have we really been dating a year? Maybe it’s like a six month anniversary? But that’s not even an anniversary!” After a few mental “Fuck!!”’s, I pulled myself together, awkwardly smiled as I picked up the card & opened it. It had been a year since I moved into my own place. In the card he wrote about how happy he was for me; that he knew how big of a deal it was for me to live on my own & he wanted me to know that it was just as important to him. I cried out of relief. He thought I was overwhelmed by his thoughtfulness, primarily because as I closed the card, hugged him, wiped my tears and sniffled into his neck, I whispered “Thank you. This means a lot.”. One year of independence; something I should have been aware of.

The first time he told me he loved me, I opened my mouth to respond & he placed his index finger on my parted lips. “Stop” he said. “Not everything I say deserves or should be met with a response Jenine. I love you. That’s it.” I of course flew into defense. “So I can’t say it back? I can’t love you in return? What kind of bullshit is that Ben? You can’t just say something like that & expect me not to say anything back.” “I never said you can’t say anything back. But think about it baby, I said I love you & your first instinct was to respond. You didn’t even really take the moment in. That’s what I’m saying. I don’t want you to love me back because I love you. I want you to love me because you actually love me.” I felt little, like a child, like I had been put in my place, handled, dealt with, but I wouldn’t let him know. “You’re such an asshole sometimes” I said “but that Benjamin, for your information, is why I love you. Because you’re only an asshole sometimes”.

There are two important things I remember from when I broke up with Ben:

1. It was raining.
2. He told me I should’ve ended us a long time ago.

I came back to the apartment from the gym. As I shook my umbrella walking through the door, Ben sauntered by in his usual attire, house sweats and no shirt, saying “You must love mopping.” in a condescending tone. I happily returned the tone saying “Definitely. I just love it! Can’t get enough.” as I rolled my eyes and the umbrella up, fastening it shut. I walked over to the kitchen & checked the fridge. All that was left was this chicken Parmesan “thing” I had attempted to make three days earlier & it looked like a big pile of mush at that point. I chucked it & decided that take out sounded good. I had a taste for some pad thai so the choice was easy. Picking up my phone & dialing the number I thought it might be a good idea to ask Ben what he wanted but I figured he’d eat whatever I ordered him. So I made the call, ordered Chicken Pad Thai and another peanut sauce dish with shrimp, and hung up. As soon as my phone had ended the call, Benjamin started an argument. “Why would you order food without asking me what I wanted?” he asked me walking out of the bedroom and I replied “I ordered food for us both. No need to say thank you”. He walked towards the window to look out but really it was all dramatics because our window looks directly at the alley behind our building that holds nothing but two dumpsters and a few forgotten cats. “Why would I say thank you to you for doing something I never asked you to do?” he said with his back turned to me “Sometimes” he scoffed, almost laughing, as he looked at the rain collect in the window sill. “Sometimes I don’t get you. Like after all this time you still do shit that irritates me and I wonder why the fuck I still want to lay next to you at night or wake up with you in the morning.” I was sitting on the sofa, absentmindedly playing with the tag on this pillow I bought two years before when he & I had just started dating. He told me the pattern on it reminded him of us; that the lines never intersected. They just changed direction. “Nobody is holding you here Ben. You can leave anytime you’d like.” I said as I picked up the remote & turned on the television.

Thirty-five minutes later I was annoyed that the food hadn’t arrived but also because Ben never left the window. He just stayed there staring at the rain while it sheeted down the window screen and when thunder roared he’d just sigh. “What could be taking this food so long? The place isn’t even that far.” I complained. “It’s the rain Jenine. Everything slows when it rains. People, cars, buses, trains, bikes, they all slow.” He paused “You also might want to factor in the idea that a bunch of people order take out on a night like this.” I answered back “I knew that!……why are you always telling me things as if I don’t know them? As if I’m not aware? It’s just annoying. You’re annoying.” Ben walked away from the window & towards the kitchen counter. He planted his two hands palm down on the counter, hoisted himself up to sit on it, looked at me & said “Maybe it’s not me that annoys you Jenine. Maybe you can’t admit that I’m ever fucking right! I can’t ever make a point without you saying “I knew that!”. If you knew it Jenine…..then why would you say half the shit you say or do half the shit you do.“ I paused the lifetime movie I had been somehow become invested in and pressed a metaphorical "play” on the scene that was unfolding in our living room. “I don’t know Ben. Maybe you’re right” I replied as I sat up, crossed my legs and interlaced my fingers over my knee. “Maybe I can’t handle the fact that you make valid points. Or perhaps it’s the fact that you can’t ever let me be wrong without making me look like a complete ass. You’re always so philosophical. "Oh thee "all knowing Ben!” Ohh he who knows more than anyone!“ I mocked. "It’s insulting. For someone who is just so wise you damn sure don’t know how to do your own fucking laundry, or wash a dish, or aim your penis directly into the bowl when you pee. Stop with the bullshit. We both have our faults.” My phone rang. The food was downstairs.

I threw on my worn out flip flops and shuffled down the 3 flights of stairs. Walking back into the apartment with food in hand, I saw that Ben had returned to the window. He walked over to the kitchen counter where I was standing, taking the food out of the brown paper bag & said “You said your ordered me food.” “I just ordered two things off the menu. I figured we’d just share.” I reasoned. “Right I get that but I don’t like peanuts. You know that. Don’t you? I’ve told you this. I’m sure I have as we’ve been together give or take I don’t know 2 & half years!” “Dammit! I whispered to myself. "I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking & I was hungry & I’m…..sorry. I’m just sorry.” “It’s fine” he said. “I should’ve just picked something up on the way home. It isn’t the first time you’ve done something like this. You’re like your mother in that way.” “Like my mother? All of this over some take out? Listen, good luck with dinner.” I said as I grabbed a plastic fork at the bottom of the bag & headed back to the sofa. “Yeah, like your mother.” he continued, following me. “You’re always complaining that she never listens to you; that you have to remind her of things you’ve already told her. Yet, here you are never listening to me. It’s not even about the apology. It’s that I just don’t think you’re really sorry at all.” he retorted. “Fair enough.” I said, putting my food down on the coffee table. “You wanna know what I’m really sorry about Ben? Huh? Fine. I’m sorry I moved in with you. I’m sorry I’ve been in this relationship for this long because we’ll never be good enough for one another. You know that right? We’re always going to be like this Ben.” I said, pointing at the pace between with both hands. “It’s never going to be enough that we love each other. There’s gotta be more to love than whatever the fuck we’re doing. I just don’t think this is healthy. I don’t think we’re growing here. Do you?”. “Now that J…that’s the most honest thing you’ve said to me. You’re always saying what you think I want to hear and that’s my problem with you. You never say what the hell you want because you think too much about it. We are growing, it’s just apart from one another.” He sighed, finally saying “Look, I’m tired.” as he walked exhaustedly back towards the bedroom, on an empty stomach & closed the door behind him. I couldn’t figure out if he meant he was tired of us, of the arguing, of never really getting back to how we were or if he was honestly tired.

I slept on the sofa & I use the term “slept” very lightly. What I really did was stare at the ceiling, trying to figure out if this was really it for Ben & I. If that was our last real conversation; if that even counted as a conversation. I planned out what I’d say in the morning after we’d both had time to think & reflect. I’d tell him I was sorry about going off & that it’s not that I don’t want to try to make it work but that I don’t even think trying is worth an actual try. I thought about it & felt like the whole relationship was a perpetual “try”. We’d just kept getting up, dusting each other off, & holding hands until we’d fall again thinking it didn’t matter because we’d fallen together. How many times do you have to fall before you realize that perhaps it isn’t the ground that’s tripping you up? That it might just be you. Do you have to scrape your knees a few times or fall flat on your face? How do you know when you’ve had enough?

I laid there falling in & out of sleep. I had this weird dream that I was baking a cake. I kept checking on it. Ben was there but he didn’t really say much. Finally I took it out of the oven & it was burnt around the edges. He shuffled over to the stovetop & looked at the cake with a somber face. “I told you it was done 10 minutes ago. You should’ve taken it out.” he said & I just stared at him blankly because he was right. I turned the pan over and the cake popped out. I let it cool, frosted it and cut a piece. Jeremy hunched over the counter top and watched me put the cake on a plate with confusion. “You’re just going to eat a burnt cake?” he questioned me. I had just taken my first bite and was going in for a second when I looked up at him and said “It still tastes good so what’s the difference?”. “The difference, Jenine, is that you know the whole cake doesn’t taste good. Only certain parts do. Why don’t you just throw it out and make another one?” he said walking over to the cake, lifting the plate up at different points and angles to get a good look at it. It was as though he was wondering how the frosting did anything but make the cake look even sadder. I licked the last bit of frosting off my fork and said “Because, burnt or not burnt, I still love cake.”

I woke up to a sliver of sunlight shining through the living room across the floor & stopping right at the front door. I sat up & checked the time. It was 7:06. I decided I’d go to the bedroom and get some real rest. I stood up & stumbled towards the bedroom. As soon as I reached the door, Ben was coming out of the room. He was dressed & had 2 bags with him not including the backpack he’d never leave the house without. All of the things I had planned on saying were forgotten. I could barely see straight, let alone gather the words I wanted to say. He looked at me then said “Sorry. Can I just get by?”. “Sure!” I blurted out as I moved to the left, almost jumping. He walked towards the front door & I asked “Umm can at least ask where you’re going?”. He stopped moving and turned, telling me “I thought about what you said J. About us not being enough for one another. I guess I just always thought it would work itself out. But I see what you mean. I don’t know the exact moment when you came to that conclusion, or maybe you decided it, but you should’ve ended us then instead of now. So I’m leaving. I guess I’ll pick up the rest of my stuff over the next couple of weeks.”. That’s it. He was gone. Whatever he had left, the “stuff” he mentioned, was never picked up. They were minuscule items really; a toothbrush, some body wash, a value pack of razors. Things that made you think of him, even though they were all replaceable. It didn’t take long for me to realize that much like the burnt cake, I still loved Ben.

To be continued or whatever…….

Zach x Reader: Before You Leave (One Shot)

(A//N: This is by far one of my least favorite work but I’ve gone so far already so I decided to post it anyway just to get it out of my drafts. SO I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS TRASH I CAME UP WITH AND BETTER CONTENT WILL ARRIVE SOON)

Plot: The one where you learned love and grudge doesn’t mix well.

Originally posted by void-obriens

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swiftiesfanatic  asked:

Amazing imagines!! I love them so much!! ❤❤ I think you've even written enough to start a masterlist soon! If you ever need any ideas/ideas for a rainy day here's a couple. However, please don't feel like I'm expecting you to write all these right now!! It's more of a compiled list of ideas for you if you're having a slow request day/just want to write them -Jealous Betty -Beach day for the gang/Betty in a swimsuit/Jughead in a swimsuit -Bughead napping together -Betty's parents walk in on them

Hey! These are all awesome! I think I’m gonna go with the hickey role reversal for today! Let’s give it a try!
***

School was ending in about a week, and summer was so close Jughead could practically smell the sunscreen and taste the countless milkshakes he would be devouring.
That being said…

It was hot.

And by hot he didn’t mean, warm with a light breeze, he meant crack an egg on it, it was smoking. He was sweating almost all the time and even with the windows open the Riverdale classrooms were boiling. Unfortunately for him that meant his typical wardrobe of flannels and jeans just wasn’t gonna cut it, and he most definitely was not gonna show up to school in one of those ridiculous tank tops with the sleeves cut down all the way to the bottom, he would leave that to Reggie and chuck. Tools.

Anyway, figuring out what to wear, that was still comfortable for him but also kept him cool enough so he didn’t pass out was a struggle. He wasn’t a shorts guy, unless they were bathing suit bottoms and he was at the beach, so he stuck to his jeans, these ones had a few holes so that should help atleast a little, digging in his drawer he pulled out the only light weight t shirt he had, it was a simple white v neck, nothing too crazy, but also something he normally wouldn’t wear without something else to cover it up, at this point he couldn’t care less, it was too damn hot.

“Looking good” he turned with a smile, meeting the eyes of the gorgeous blonde who had come out of nowhere. Okay so maybe there was one positive thing about the heat, Betty’s wardrobe had to adjust accordingly as well and man was he grateful for the tiny dresses that showed off her gorgeous long legs. Today she had on a white sundress covered in pink and red flowers, it skimmed her mid thigh and he fought the urge to run his fingers along the bare skin. As soon as he was about to retort with a witty comeback, her eyes got wide

“Oh my god” she looked horrified.

Whipping around to look behind him, confused as to what had her in such a state of panic she repeated a little more panicky

“Oh my god.”

“Betty? what the hell? What’s the matter?” She seemed to be at a loss for words and suddenly two more of the gang had arrived, both wearing Similar expressions to Bettys.

“What in sexy time?!” Veronica was practically bouncing she seemed so excited.

Kevin was moving his hands to jugheads neck, before he dodged them with a glare

“What are you all talking about.”

Suddenly Archie was rounding the corner zeroing in on Jughead

“Hey ma… hey! Nice hickey dude! Way to go” he slapped a hand to jugheads shoulder, smiling.

“What! What hick..what are you.” He was twisting trying to find the offending mark. He glanced up at Betty who was beet red and was desperately trying to hide her laughter.

“See Betty, I told you. It’s totally normal to give a boy a hickey, That’s so funny, Betty was just asking me about this at our sleepover last week.” Veronica said laughing handing Jughead her hand mirror.

He snatched the mirror and held it up to his neck. Sure enough, there was a purple mouth shaped bruise on his neck. Snapping the mirror shut he shook his head

“Bacon grease, it splattered.”

Everyone eyed him sceptically as Cheryl walked over

“Oh please, like you cook. Just fess up Jughead, who’s the mystery woman?” The redhead asked.

“There’s no one, you’re all nuts.”

The conversation was stopped short by the first period bell.

“Dude, were totally talking about this at lunch,” Archie said grinning

“Duh” Veronica added throwing a wave to Betty, leaving behind Jughead and Betty as Kevin kissed Betty on the cheek before walking off with Cheryl.

There was a moment of silence Betty smirking at her bright red boyfriend

“So… a tshirt today? No flannel.”

He stared at her dryly

“Wait till all of our friends find out what a little minx you are. You won’t be laughing then.”

Betty shrugged, smiling guiltily and turning on her heels to walk the other way , she quickly turned around and added

“No one told you to wear the worlds sexiest tshirt the day after our two month anniversary festivities.”
She winked and practically skipped off.

He slammed his head into the locker gently. She was gonna be the death of him.
**

By the time lunch came around the entire school was talking about Jugheads hickey, the rumors were everywhere,

Jughead was seeing Ethel,

Jughead was seeing a girl from central

And of course, Archie and jughead were a couple (that one was Reggie. Tool.)

Slamming his tray on the table besides Betty, she jumped up smiling and meeting his eyes.

The rest of the gang was already there and they instantly turned the conversation to hickeys.

Cheryl of course instigating it
“Well it has to be someone who’s aggressive, obvi, look at that mark.”

Veronica nodded “agreed. I could never do something that good, and I’ve been told I’m a pretty fiery lover.” She flipped her dark hair , smiling.

Cheryl nodded “and we all know how intense I am, but that’s good, even for me.”

Kevin said something that had Archie practically dying he was laughing so hard.

“And we all know it can’t be Betty, no offense bets but we all kind of agree, your not really the most passionate lover.”

Before Jughead could even think he had opened his mouth “try again, she’s pretty much the definition of passionate.”

Everyone at the table seemed to have stopped time, slowly turning their heads to stare at the pair in front of them. Betty was blushing so hard they thought she might explode and jughead was kind of just lost in his own idiocy.

“B..Betty?” Archie squeaked out.

“No way you’re lying.” This time it was kevin.

And Cheryl and Veronica were just staring, shocked.

Suddenly something in Betty snapped and she turned to Kevin.

“Actually, yes it was me. As quiet as you think I am, I am very very attracted to my boyfriend, therefore sometimes I get carried away. Can we please stop this conversation now.” She stabbed a piece of lettuce with her fork.

The table went dead silent for thirty seconds before all hell broke loose.

“Boyfriend?”
“Carried away?!”
“How long?”
“How did you get it in that shape?”

Dropping her head to the table, she sighed as Jugheads arm came to rest around her shoulder, tugging her into his side.

“No questions, were dating, going on two months. That’s all you’ve gotta know.” The lazy tone in his voice left no room for argument and the table went silent once again.

Squeezing his hand in hers, she smiled up at him. This was far from over and they both knew that, but for right now, their friends were just gonna have to wait. They were happy, and that’s what matters.

lesbi-dishonest  asked:

What is executive dysfunction? I tried to google it but all the answers were so wordy and hard to understand. Is it a symptom of ADHD? A disorder? I don't quite understand.

Executive dysfunction can be kind of a confusing thing, and it’s a few different things, so I’ll try and boil it down a bit :)

Plain old Executive Function is basically what makes us do the things we’re supposed to do. Say you have an assignment due for school. Executive function is what lets you:

1. Remember that you have the assignment.
2. Budget time for it.
3. Take initiative to start working on it.
4. Stay focused until it is complete.

Executive DYSfunction, is the condition of having a dysfunctional executive function. So with the same assignment, and executive dysfunction, you would:

1. Forget the assignment (out of sight, out of mind)
2. Not be able to forecast how much time or energy the assignment will take, and then not budget correctly (thinking you can write an entire paper in one night or one hour)
3. Even when you want to work, you can’t initiate working (your body feels like it can’t obey your brain)
4. You lose steam early on and don’t have the energy or focus to finish the assignment, and you may or may not even turn in the assignment.

It’s not the same as procrastination. When you procrastinate, you have the initiative to work and just don’t want to. With Executive Dysfunction, you just can’t work, even if you really want to.

Executive function is present in every part of your life. It’s associated most with school and work, but it also takes EF to feed yourself regularly and in a healthy way, to take showers, to pay bills, to clean your home, it all comes down to executive function.

I hope that helps! I have a few posts tagged either “executive function” or “executive dysfunction” which show people’s real life experiences, and that will give you an idea of the scope as well!

7 Minutes in Hell (Jughead Jones x Reader)

A/N: Not Valentine’s Day related at all but hey, whaddaya know, I’m on the Riverdale train and I love Jughead so here you go! 

Word Count: 2328

This was not how I planned on spending my Saturday night.

It was customary to go to the Blossom mansion for the usual weekend fun, even more now that I was a Vixen than before. Her parents were a bit more lenient on the underage drinking, assuming we were coping with the discovery of Jason’s body, and we were all crowded around the living room coffee table doing everything but mourning his death. All was well until of course it was time for Seven Minutes in Heaven. I turned to hug the wall when Cheryl set her sights right on me.

She didn’t believe that I was Vixen material and was hellbent on making me prove myself ever since I made the squad. She hated me enough to keep me on the squad just so I’d be out of my element and as uncomfortable as possible, and I hated her enough to prove to her I could be just as much as a Vixen if not more than her. Our rivalry ran deep from the time we were kids to now, and I didn’t see it changing anytime soon.

“Y/N? Be a jewel and start the night’s festivities, will you?”

I gave her the same fake smile I’d grown used to giving her by this point. “Of course.” I went to the coffee table and spun the empty beer bottle to see who’d I get to spend one-on-one time with in Cheryl’s coat closet. We were having a stare down when the bottle stopped, landing between Moose and someone I never expected to be anywhere near a Cheryl Blossom party. I opened my mouth to invite Moose to the closet when Cheryl rushed to cut me off.

“Jones! Looks like it’s your lucky day,” she said with a sinister smirk. I grit my teeth and grinned, looking down at Jughead.

He sighed, his face unamused as he took the final sip of his beer before hopping up. “Lucky. That’s one word for it…” He turned and made way for the coat closet without another word, which I took as my cue to follow him.

“See you in seven minutes,” Cheryl sang behind us.

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First Kiss (Older!Damian Wayne x Reader)

Requests:

Older damian wayne x female reader would be awesome. Your choice of topic. Thx :D

Can you do an older (18-20 yr old) first kiss with Damian and can you make it sweet and fluffy?

Notes: My first imagine!!! It took me longer to edit and have enough inspiration to finish it but it’s finally here :-). Also I changed the second request a lil bit, Damian is probably 15-16 here

Warnings: None

You guys had been friends for enough time for Damian to realize that what he felt for you wasn’t simple tolerance.

Oh no. Everyone could see it and it made him wish he could murder all his brothers in their sleep. That technically he could, but not without getting a really long lecture from Alfred or something.

The whole family was excited to meet the girl that made the demon blush and smile, even Bruce. So when they found out you were coming over to the manor to work on an English project, there was nothing he could do.

Damian tried to cancel or set it up somewhere else but you weren’t having none of it. After the mess you were raised in, how bad could his family honestly be?

The thought of Damian just being ashamed of introducing his new poor friend to his wealthy famous family crossed your mind but he assured you several times that he was ashamed of his family, not you.

He talked to you about his father, who you were already intimidated by. Her eldest brother, Dick, apparently the only decent sibling he had according to him. The one who followed, Jason, the black sheep of the family with a terrible common sense. Tim, the one he hated the most for some reason. And Alfred, the butler.

A butler… you weren’t even sure you currently had milk.

You had seen the old british man a couple of times when he picked up Damian from school but he never let you get close enough to introduce yourself, so this was gonna be new.

The atmosphere in the limo was more awkward than you expected.

Alfred said a polite “Good morning, miss Y/L/N. I’ve heard a lot about you, it’s nice to finally meet you” that was received with Damian watching him cautiously.

During the ride, you could notice Damian avoided eye contact by looking out the window. His jaw was clenched and brows slightly furrowed.

This change might have gone unnoticed by someone who hadn’t gotten to know Damian’s mannerisms as well as you through all these months.

You reached for one of his hands and covered it with yours, gently squeezing it. “It’s gonna be fine, Dami. Quit worrying that much.”

Once you arrived at the manor, Damian started walking in front of instinctively as if protecting you from something. It didn’t take long to realize what it was.

You had to admit you hadn’t given much thought to what could be expecting you at the Wayne Manor, but this still startled you.

Questions like “Are you friends with him because of the fame and money?”, “Did he hire you?”, “Is he threatening you? Blink twice for yes, once for no”, “Are you some kind of witch?”, “Do you owe him a favor?” were being thrown all around.

Damian tried to get you as away from his brothers as possible, his face was red with rage and embarrassment and he kept yelling at everyone to leave you alone. Finally, he managed to escape and pulled you toward an empty garden.

When he made sure no one was following you, he turned around biting the inside of his lip.

“I’m sorry for that, Y/N.”

Damian wasn’t sure if you were gonna stay quiet, change the topic or leave. But he was greatly surprised when you opened your mouth and let out a whole-heartedly laugh that made his heart swell.

“Well, I can’t say you didn’t warn me.” You joked.

“I promise I’ll make sure they never look in your direction again or else–” He started, getting more furious with every second.

“Damian! It’s fine, really.” You put both your hands over each of his shoulders, causing his muscles to tense, and shot a calming look his way. “I love them, your family is great.”

The Wayne boy softly shrugged your touch off and crossed his arms. “They are nothing but an inconvenience.”

“An inconvenience you love.” You commented, swiftly glancing at him and then looking at the beautiful growing trees that you were sure only Alfred took care of.

-TT- Whatever.”

After some minutes in a comfortable silence, just observing the beautiful plants, flowers and sunny sky. You decided to sit on the grass, against the prettiest tree you could spot.

“Maybe we could do our project here?”

He followed you and sat beside you, nodding as you started to unpack your bag.

“Thank you, by the way.” You murmured, unsure.

Damian examined you with confusion. “What do you mean?”

“For bringing me here, introducing me to your family… For being my friend, I guess.” You smiled shyly at him, shrugging and looking down at your lap, trying not to let him notice your face was probably boiling.

You hated the way Damian could make you feel, but you were also enchanted by it.

“Of course, Y/N. But I should be the one thanking you, you’ve helped me in ways I wish I could share with you.” Damian confessed, thinking back of all those times a text from you was enough to calm him down and seeing your smile would make all his frustrations go away.

You chuckled sweetly. “I don’t see how that’s possible but you are welcome.” And there it was, that warm and innocent grin that could light up his entire world in just one second.

None of you had realized how much time you spent looking into each other’s eyes, none of you was counting. But you could recall catching a glimpse of Damian glancing at your lips as you unconsciously licked the lower one.

It happened fast, but slow at the same time. Your breath halted due to the nervousness of Damian’s face approaching yours, but you could also experience the shock when you felt his lips on yours.

For a first kiss, there was nothing gross or awkward about it. His lips could look rough and chapped most of the time but you were gladly surprised to discover that they were actually really soft and sweet.

The kiss lasted for only a few seconds and soon you were pulling apart. You didn’t know where to look at but it was clearly pointless to try to hide your blushing anymore. Your mouth started to generate some small giggles and you had to stop before you punched yourself in the face.

Well if the kiss wasn’t awkward, the after-kiss would surely be.

Once you dared to look at Damian, you were surprised to learn that he wasn’t staring at you, he was staring at something behind you. You followed his gaze only to see a pair of heads and eyes through the bushes of the garden.

Realizing you had seen what he did, his expression turned more mortified than pissed off and he quickly stood up, taking steps towards his eldest brothers.

Your palm hit your mouth to muffle the loud laughing that was coming out of you as your eyes followed your crush chasing after his brothers who were calling out Alfred’s name.

Boy, you were gonna enjoy being part of this family.