this is what i have to deal with at collin's

The Joker x Reader - “The Red Queen”

The Joker’s Red Queen is as dangerous and lethal as he is. Her heart is full of secrets and she is capable of unspeakable acts. The Queen of Gotham wouldn’t have survived for so long in his world if not for her perfect instincts and abilities.

“Hey, didn’t see you around before; what’s your name?” you address J, turning your head towards him.

“No talking!” one of the heavily geared soldiers warns, holding tighter to his riffle.

You ignore him, rattling your chains in order to get The Joker’s attention:

“Hey, handsome, are you single?”

“I said no talking!” and the van takes a sharp turn, making you lean on J for a few seconds. “Pardon me, sir,” you sniffle, “it wasn’t on purpose. Do you work out?”

“What did I just tell you, hm?” the guard snaps, getting annoyed with your crap.

The Joker has the most demented grin they ever saw on anybody’s face: he just keeps on looking straight, not saying a word. It makes all 5 of them uncomfortable, even if they’ve seen a few insane things in their line of work.

One of the guards quietly analyzes you:  he didn’t see you in person before and now that you’re right in front of him he can’t help but glare:

You are wearing a two piece red leather suit, pants and sleeveless top, red high hills and your very red and very long hair almost reaches your waist. You have “RED QUEEN” tattooed around your neck with red ink like a choker, the word “Joker” repeatedly going down from it about an inch apart, making look like a necklace. Your left cheek has “King” tattooed with green ink next to a red heart and your right cheek is tattooed with the word “Queen.” More tattoos on your arms, spelling “J+Y/N”, “Red Queen” and “Mister J’s Queen.”

You smirk and he realizes you’re looking back at him.

“You’re cute. Like what you see?” you wink, unraveling your perfect white teeth that stand out even more against the bright red lipstick.

No answer.

“Are you hitting on my woman?” The Clown Prince of Crime finally speaks in such an outworldly tone it almost manifests in physical form. Definitely gave you goosebumps and you love it. Your guardians, not that much.

“I wasn’t doing any…”

“Don’t engage, that’s what they want,” the one that seems in charge reminds the rest of them.

You giggle, then start humming and grab J’s arm:

“Anytime now,” you whisper and your hand gets slapped away by the soldier that was checking you out earlier:

“No touching you damned lunatics!”

“Calm down, we are only here to make sure they get to the destination, it will be over soon,” the guy next to him points out, trying to keep everybody’s temper under control.

“If you touch The Red Queen one more time, you’re dead,” J threatens, the psychotic smug smile returning on his face.

“Shut the hell up, you crazy son of a…” the warden starts his tirade but gets interrupted.

“I said don’t engage, it is exactly what they want!”

“Yes, captain,” the man straightens his back even more, taking a deep breath before regaining his posture.

“Wise words honey,” you agree, smacking your lips. “And if you talk to the King of Gotham in such a disrespectful manner one more time, you’re not going to live through the night,” you crack your shoulders, maintaining an eerie smile.

“Shut up!” you get yelled at once more.

“Nobody…” The Joker’s chest is going up and down faster and faster, “…tells my Queen to shut up except me!!” He’s beginning to lose control and you are very fond of what follows.

“Why are these two freaks so obsessed with each other?! I don’t get it!” the soldier that slapped your hand gets mad.

“Do not engage, don’t make me repeat it one more time!!!” the captain snarls, tired with tonight’s assignment. He was supposed to be in bed already, if not for this stupid late night secret mission.

“Sorry, sir,” the apology is fast to follow.

You tap your red painted nails on the metal bar that separates your seat from J’s, amused.

“This was fun, huh? I’m not bored anymore,” you snicker and the Joker is fast to laugh in such a strange way it makes them all cringe.

A sudden strong impact and the van being turned around at 360 degrees makes you grab his hand and mutter:

“A few minutes late; could be worse, right?”

*****************
*** Both of you were in the mood for some action and had to do something about it: you decided to burgle a fancy jewelry store and let yourselves be captured. Of course that once the cops were there they called the Special Unit Force to escort you in great secrecy to Gotham Police headquarters.

Frost and your henchmen were instructed to follow closely and stop them from fulfilling their objective. All was planned in only one day: when the adrenaline rushes through your veins, no need for more - just act on instinct and impulsiveness. Your goons faked a blockade and the unmarked, bullet proof van took a turn towards the less busy roads under the Bridge of Angels. No convoy of police cars, no sirens, no fuss: the point was to haul you without getting any unwanted attention.

Which you guessed will happen.

And it did. ***

“What do you want to do with them, Doll?” J aims his head towards the kneeled soldiers surrounded by about 25 armed henchmen.

“I don’t know, they were pretty entertaining, don’t you think?” you rest your head on The Joker’s shoulder as he’s holding on to your waist.

“Should we kill them?” he inquires, undecided. He’s starting to trace your neck tattoo with his fingers, purring with such intensity it sends shivers down your spine. How you love the sensation!

“Whatever you want, baby,” you bite your red lips, fluttering your eyelashes. “But I don’t want be here anymore since we already had our fun. Actually…I take it back…We can have even more fun since we’re still awake,” you change your mind instantly because you’re both so turned on by tonight’s events. “Just state your will and then let’s go, the boys can take care of the rest. I really want to get you back to the penthouse. Pleeassee…” you moan the last sentence in his ear and he closes his eyes, aroused with anticipation.

“You’re such a bad girl, Pumpkin,” he growls, brushing his thumb on your “King” tattoo for a few moments, fighting with himself. “Go in the car, I’ll be back shortly,” he urges you, spanking your butt as you turn around and walk away towards one of the SUV’s awaiting on the side of the road.

******************

Early morning and you didn’t snooze for one second. You surely exhausted J and now he’s in a deep sleep. You carefully move your head from his chest, cautious not to wake him up. You snatch a pair of jeans and a t-shirt from the closet, not making any noises, and after finding your car keys you sneak out of the penthouse, avoiding being seen at all costs.

After about 20 minutes of driving, you get to the meeting point at the abandoned factory on Helssel Street. Your contact is already there. You approach, suspicions.

“Who are you?” you grumble, surveilling your surroundings, just in case.

“My name is agent Collins. Nice to meet you agent Y/N,” the guy tries to speak and you cut him off.

“Spare me! Are you new?” you squint your eyes, already uneasy and displeased.

“Yes, just started with the bureau 6 months ago,” he informs, holding his ground.

“Are you kidding me??!! They are sending someone new? What level are you, did you even get your clearance level A yet?!” you raise your voice, annoyed. My God, what the hell are they doing sending this newbie to talk to you?!

“Not yet, soon, this is one of my tasks in order to obtain it.”

“I only deal with FBI agents that are at least level C, this is unacceptable!” you strut towards him and he doesn’t seem happy at your rant.

“With all due respect, agent Y/N, you might be level E, but it doesn’t mean that…” Collins protests, aware his skills need improvement but he’s not incompetent, otherwise he wouldn’t have made it this far.

“With all due respect, agent Collins,” you interrupt with a gesture of your hand,” don’t speak about things you know nothing about. I am involved in a very dangerous and strenuous undercover mission as I am sure you are aware. I can’t risk having my cover blown off, not after 3 years. It was very hard work to get into his world and make him trust me. I can’t risk any mistakes, that’s why I am appalled they send a new agent for our little briefing.”

“I am good at what I do, I’m not a kid. Please don’t address me as such,” he has the nerve to reply.

You chuckle, wanting to punch his lights out:

“Do you know what level E is?”

Collins nods a yes, irked you treat him like an idiot when in fact he’s very capable of handling all this. You just have your opinions so you continue:

“Level E agents are trained to do everything it takes for their missions. EVERYTHING! And The Joker is one…” and you almost scream, ”…tough insane psychopath!!! And I have to fuck him, kill for him, do EVERYTHING he asks of me since I am his ‘girlfriend’. Oh, I’m sorry, am I offending your little virgin ears??!!!” you suck on your teeth when he flaunts that grimace all over his mug. “I do EVERYTHING to keep myself in his world, this way I can give the Bureau all the info they need about the corrupt officials he deals with, future plans he might have, names, locations and dates. The Joker will go down last, after we get all we need.”

He is clearly offended and you are losing your patience. You take a deep breath and finish the meeting:

“Tell them all is good, I will e-mail them more encrypted data soon,” and you start walking away.

“I will actually be the one decrypting it!” he notifies you and you just raise your arm, shaking it as goodbye.

“Tell someone that cares, honey.”

You walk a couple of blocks to get to the alley where you parked your car. You are furious they send an agent in training and keep on mumbling to yourself. You had more things to say but because you’re stubborn, you refused to. I guess you’ll just have to send all the stuff in your e-mail.

You are almost at your vehicle when you see a shadow emerging from behind the building and you realize is The Joker.

“Baby Doll,” he walks fast your way and you nervously gulp, halting in your tracks.

“J, what are you doing here? I was just…”

You don’t get to finish your phrase because he hugs you tight, crushing you in his arms.

“I am being a gentleman and making sure my girl gets safely to her car,” he whispers and you lose your breath when you feel the sharp blade piercing through your ribs, deeper and deeper. You push him away, wincing in pain, hardly being able to still stand, shocked.

Why are you so dizzy and why can’t you move? You attempt to say something but barely manage to open your mouth. You start coughing and lean your back against the car, sliding down to the ground, everything fading from your already cloudy mind.

“Something to remind you of me, Kitten,” J stops in front of you, kicking your leg.  “The blade has been dipped in a paralyzing substance, this way you won’t struggle. As a thanks for being an awesome girlfriend,” and he reaches his hand to close your eyes. You wish you could fight, but the numbness took over your body with an alarming velocity. And now that your eyes are closed, maybe they won’t open again.

*****************

“Welcome back, Y/N,” you hear Commissar Gordon’s voice and you blink a few times, trying to focus on his face.

“Hello, s-sir…” you manage utter, coming back to reality. You are in a hospital bed, hooked to IV’s. “Where…where am I?” you lift your head from the pillow and instantly drop it back, weak and feeling drained.

“FBI headquarters, ICU unit, I guess you’re not familiar since you’ve never had to use it,” he gets up from his chair and takes a sit on your bed.

“How long was I out?” you lick your lips, thirsty and still a bit out of it.

“Two days. You were lucky Agent Collins followed you and found you in time,” he sighs, grateful you are still breathing.

“That bad, huh?” you moan in pain when you try to turn on your side. You lift the sheet up and see you are patched up where The Joker stabbed you.

“Well, it wasn’t good either. I’m glad you’re still with us,” Gordon admits and you know he’s sincere.

“Thank you, sir,” you wince in pain. “My cover got blown up, do we know what happened?” you request to find out.

“No, not yet, I think we might have a moll, we are thoroughly investigating the problem.”

“3 years…3 fucking years, and all is lost,” your eyes get teary from frustration and he touches your hand, sympathetic.

“I’m sorry, you were unbelievably tenacious and did a lot of good work. I know you’ve been through hell…”

“I’m fine,” you lie, not happy at your present situation.

“They will want to talk to you as soon as possible, they need all the information they can obtain. You don’t get to rest even if you deserve it. They will expect a full report and you’ll have to go through all the required steps, there are rules to be followed.”

“I know, sir,” you finally manage to lift yourself on your elbow.

“They are aware certain…feelings and …emotions are involved after being with him for so long, they want you in counselling and therapy too.”

“I understand the procedure, sir, it’s OK,” you agree, obedient. All this shit that follows comes with the job. “I don’t know how he followed me, I added the sleeping pills in his water and watched him drink it,” you fret, puzzled on how it went downhill so fast. “I’m a level E agent, I know what I’m doing.”

The commissar gets up, taking his leave. He knows better than to let you continue to torment yourself at this point. It’s no use.

“I’ll let you rest, then, we’ll keep in touch.”

You point your finger towards your neck tattoo, no words are necessary.

“You’ll have those removed as soon as there’s time.”

“Sir!” you yell after him when he opens the door. “Can I please have somebody help dying my hair back to black today? I can’t stand this red anymore!”

“Of course,” he exhales, contemplating about a million things he needs to do after this total fiasco of your undercover operation ending so abruptly.

******************

A few weeks go by and you are caught in the endless twist of briefings, meetings, reports and assessment sessions to assert your state of mind, while they are looking for The Joker with no success. You didn’t even have time to remove all your tattoos because it’s a long process and right now you don’t have precious hours to spare. You just cover your skin with make-up, burying your past under and the two accursed names that will forever be ingrained in your memory: The Joker and his Red Queen.  

*****************

**Three months after the incident the SWAT team was able to capture your former boyfriend at your suggestion that he might be hanging around certain places. After all, you knew so many of his secrets and were able to predict his moves because you got to experience firsthand on how he works. You are not a level E agent for nothing! You didn’t waste so many years on this task, so much of your life and expertise just to sit around and not counteract. When you got the call in the middle of the night, you jumped out of bed so fast you almost dropped your cell, shaking at the unexpected news. He will be transported in great secrecy to Arkham Asylum where he surely belongs.

You are appointed as one of the 4 agents to accompany him to his destination and you get ready in such a hurry it scares you. Can’t wait to face the jerk and strangle him yourself if you get the chance, that is. **

You are sitting right across from a handcuffed Joker, panting and trying to control your urge to act. He just looks down at his shoes, avoiding eye contact for once. The other three agents are sitting to your left in perfect silence and alert.

J decides to move his blue gaze from the floor to your face, a total deranged smirk flourishing on his lips.

“Hi there Princess,” and he snorts, rolling his eyes.

“No talking!” one of your companions warns.

“What is it with you guys and no talking, huh?” he moves his jaw sideways, his eyes burning with madness.

The van stops at a red light and then continues its itinerary.

He winks at you, delighted in his lunacy.

“I’m glad to see you’re alive and well, Doll,” he yammers, disregarding the rest of them. “Daddy missed you!” he purrs and you clench your teeth, really straining to keep it together.

“Cut it out or you’re gonna get it!” the threat comes and he laughs, excited.

“Ahhhh, promise?… Don’t interrupt while I’m talking to my woman!!” he abruptly changes his voice to such a low tone it’s uncomfortable to hear.

You indifferently begin to wipe the foundation covering your tattoos on neck and cheeks with the sleeve of your suit, still quiet.

“Shut it down, Clown, I mean it!!!” the guy closest to you loses his patience, aggravated.

You instantly decide to verbalize your feelings:

“If you talk to the King of Gotham in such a disrespectful manner one more time, you’re not going to live through the night,” you tilt your head towards the man, chuckling and they all instinctively reach for their guns. “Thank God I was in charge of loading them, right?” you kiss the air, satisfied they fell for it. “Nahhh, I wouldn’t do that,” you pucker your lips when they still try to do something about it, getting ready to fight. “Don’t do anything stupid, you know what I’m capable of. Might I remind you I’m a level E agent?”

*****************

You kick the limp bodies at your feet, uncuffing J in the process.

“You’re mad at me?” he checks, inhaling your perfume.

“I thought we agreed you’re not going to stab me, yes?!” you snap at him, and he kisses your wrist, euphoric to touch you again. “You really took me by surprise!”
“I changed my mind, it was the best plan in order to achieve what we wanted, Pumpkin. And I used the paralyzing substance so you won’t feel pain. Am I nice to my girl or what?!” he praises himself, high from all the excitement of seeing you in action again; it’s been a while. 

“I have a scar, you know I hate scars!” you complain, pushing him away when he tries to hug you but then yank him back in your embrace, infatuated by his presence.

“But it was fun, wasn’t it? We were sooo bored, at least it was entertaining for a while. And you got me all the info I wanted right from the source,” he impatiently kisses you and it makes you weak in the knees. “How come my Red Queen has black hair, hm?” he tugs on your long locks, his hot lips kissing your shoulder up your neck. “Unacceptable!” he growls and you smile, enjoying having him so close again.

“It will be back to red again tomorrow,” you agree and you sense the van stopping. “I think we’re here,” you happily announce, relieved you’re back where you belong and don’t have to pretend anymore.

*************************

Your treachery was a strong blow to the bureau; they didn’t expect that to happen in a million years. Commissar Gordon was heartbroken at the news, he completely trusted you and had high hopes. He even saw you in a high rank within the organization as a future perspective. He would have vouch for you and supported you all the way.

But things turned ugly and it pains him to add your name to the FBI most wanted list. He took it upon himself to update your online file:

Agent Name: Y/N

Code Name: The Red Queen

Clearance Level: E

Status: Inactive

Special instructions: Extremely dangerous, approach with caution

His fingers are hesitant on the keyboard as he types in the final note:

Grade A Warning: Rogue


Also read: MASTERLIST

http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/153664676321/joker-x-reader-masterlist

Okay so I’ve only made one post about Fantastic Beasts and that was to shade some people but like honestly…

I’m emotional still. I’ve seen it twice and I want to watch it again. I want it projected onto my gravestone when I die. 

-Ok so Newt is the purest thing on this Earth and I just need to give him a hug and he’s such a little dork (’mummy’s here’ and remember it’s MUMMY bc my boy is as british as they come and if I see one more person write mommy I’m gonna flip)
-Jacob is a beautiful soft man and I need him as a friend thank 
-Tina is like.. 11/10 pls let her be my mum 
-Queenie.. The adorable BAMF that she is… is so pure (honestly i’m so gay she’s the best)
-And of course I have to mention my boy Credence (like wtf was that shit how daRE? I’m still so upset about it like what… Why? I honestly have no idea how to deal with these things bc he was just so… small) 
-Is the real Graves okay and alive omg where’s he at
-ew we all know what I’m talking about lmao 
-The actual creatures in the film tho they were all so magical and beautiful and so adorable (look I’m not saying I want them all I’m just saying it’d be great if I had 100% of them) 
-Collin Farrell (60/11 pls)
- credenceˈkriːd(ə)ns/noun1.belief in or acceptance of something as true (do you ever just cry about this?)
-Manipulation shown perfectly and although it was so painful to watch it was so good 
-(Grindelwald… why in the fuck was he american when he’s really not supposed to be and WHAT in the world did he mean like what was he talking about I bet Newt just stood there like???? bc me too???)
-lmao Ezra Miller being 12/10 somehow and making me cry like bitch excuse me 
-aaaay fellow gingers 
-I want someone to look at me with as much love as Newt holds for all his creatures
-Great haircuts (looking at u Credence bc tbh it looked okay? but that might just be the magic of ezra miller looking good all the time 
-A film with a Hufflepuff main character hells yeh (tho I am a slytherin but that’s not the point bc hufflepuffs are adorable) 
-Credence deserved better he better get better things later on (I swear if he gets hurt anymore I will cry)
-the beautiful everything except for that one blob of toxic waste near the end lmao

So yeh

Originally posted by secretly-a-wizard

Originally posted by k2so

Originally posted by dailynewtina

Originally posted by chatnoirs-baton

Originally posted by exfuckcharming

HEY! WELCOME!

Hello? He- helloooo- Test, one, two, tes- DID SOMEONE TURN OFF THIS MIC?! Oh. Oh, there we go. Hey, HEY, everyone! Our people! What’s shakin? Hearty congratulations on finding our Tumblr page. I mean, really. This place is cavernous. So much stuff. So much blogging. So much Misha Collins. But you, you found us. Our funny little corner of the Tumblr world.

So, what’s the deal with this joint?  We’re counting on you to show us around.  We’ll be bringing all kinds of bits and bobs from KINGS OF CON to the table, but really can’t wait to see what you guys have to share!

To new frontiers! See you in the blog-o-sphere! (Is that a word?) KINGS OUT.

2

“What did you do?”

“What you would have done. Save my people”

“Where are my people?”

“I’m sorry Clarke. They weren’t part of the deal.

In case you need it today

Here’s some Misha and a kitten (well, a cat):

And here’s Misha claiming he’s not a kitten:

And here is Misha’s face photoshopped onto a kitten:

Because everyone needs Misha and kittens if they’re having a bad day.

(Shout out to @mishamuffin, cuz I heard she was having a bad day.)

Now, onto something completely different:

Misha dealing with someone dressed like a kitten…sort of…

katnissdoesnotfollowback

My Hunger Games story actually starts before the books were published. Probably right around the time Suzanne Collins was writing them. I made some poor decisions in college that involved a toxic relationship and a stubborn refusal to see that the degree program I had entered was something that I was vaguely interested in, but didn’t want to spend my life doing. The result of these horrible decisions was that by the time I was 20, I had lost all my self-confidence and had stopped creative writing completely, even though writing had long been one of my favorite things to do. It didn’t help that my family had been reminding me for years just how difficult it was to become a published author. Still, I struggled through, ending that awful relationship, which made things better, and finishing my degree, but I usually felt almost like a ghost.

Graduation came with a commission into the military, and I found some happiness in the form of the man I am now married too. Eventually, though, I found myself in a position at my job where I morally disagreed with what I was expected to do and ordered to “Shut up and do as you’re told” when I protested. This on top of a struggle with as yet undiagnosed bipolar made life, well a roller-coaster.

The year the first book was published, I left the military and basically wandered in a fog, half-living and questioning every choice I made. In the meantime, my spouse (also in the military) started deploying. I could set my watch by his deployments. Four months gone, four months home, repeat. It was mind-numbing to say the least, and didn’t help that he left on one of these deployments when our first-born was only a few weeks old, leaving me to find my way through new motherhood and post-partem depression alone.

Over time, he developed mild PTSD. I continued dealing with my own bipolar. I lost one friend to the effects of PTSD, and another to death in a war that sometimes feels like it will never end and frequently seems pointless or unjustified. There’s doubt and fear and a desensitization to something that shouldn’t be seen as normal, but it is normal in our lives. Also the constant feeling that we’re doing something wrong but how do we really fix that? Confusion because both my husband and I were raised to, and usually do, feel pride in serving our country. Our marriage almost fell apart twice and I frequently worried about raising my kids in this world.

At one point, during yet another deployment, I was mindlessly browsing and stumbled across this book trilogy, the whole set on e-books for $11. The description intrigued me, so I bought it but then completely forgot about it. In June 2012, I saw a cast interview. I can’t even remember who it was or what they talked about. I think they were actually promoting another movie and The Hunger Games was only mentioned briefly. But I realized that those books I’d bought on sale had been made into movies. I’ve always preferred reading the books first, so I made time to sit down and read them.

All three books in four days. I didn’t sleep much that week. And as soon as I finished them, I had to go back and read them again almost immediately.

After that, I tried to let them go, but couldn’t. Whenever I read something else, I found my mind wandering back to Panem. I searched until I found a theater still playing the first movie months after it had premiered. When I got home, I still couldn’t let it go. The story and the characters just spoke to me in a way that none others ever have. Don’t get me wrong, I am a huge fan of all sorts of stories and have a favorite characters list ten miles long. But Katniss and Peeta and Haymitch and all the others…their story would not leave me be. It was like my life had been written out mostly in metaphor but sometimes in almost scary reality in this fantastical YA dystopia that felt so terribly bleak but also blooming with hope.

In desperation, I  read online reviews of the books and searched for any kind of forum that was discussing these stories. I was desperate to talk to someone about them, and no one I knew had read them yet. My search eventually led me to fanfiction, which almost immediately led me to tumblr. At first, I stalked a couple of writers and their blogs anonymously, but eventually I caved and made my own. Then I promptly lurked in the corner reading and writing but never posting.

It was an awakening. Writing fanfiction brought me back to why I spent junior high and high school with a notebook always at hand, and an ink stain and a writer’s lump on my right middle finger. I was able to find joy in things that hadn’t made me smile in years and I finally, FINALLY, started to feel like me again.

About a year ago, I worked up the courage to post something for Prompts in Panem. It wasn’t my first fanfiction, it isn’t the most well known, and it’s probably not the best either. But it is nearest and dearest to my heart as it was written with no outline, no planning, just me sitting down at the laptop and pouring out every last emotion I had been feeling and suppressing since around the time Suzanne Collins came up with the idea for the books.

Now, I’m turning things around and getting back to what I should have done over a decade ago…writing and editing stories. I’ve made new friends here who encourage and support me in that goal, but who I also trust with so many other aspects of my life. I found new ways to deal with some of the issues I face day-to-day, opened up more to the people who matter most to me and found that, surprisingly, they were okay with this version of me. It’s not perfect. There are still days that are rough, but at least they’re now outnumbered by the good days. Perhaps it’s corny and cliché, but these books helped me find a way to make my life good again.

katnissdoesnotfollowback

please everyone listen up you need to know noW that misha collins is the best person on the entire planet. last night i was able to tell him how important he is to me and he did nothing but listen and make me feel like he cared about what i was telling him. he held my hand and told me that he wants me to take care of myself and i will refuse to listen to anyone who tells me he didnt mean it or its dumb to make a big deal over this or whatever. those few words i had with him made me feel more loved than i have in a long time. i cant even fathom that this happened and it will always feel surreal to me and i cant thank misha enough for what he did for me last night.

William Shatner answers a few Misha/SPN/GISHWHES related questions on Reddit
  • User 1: If Misha were to be cast into a Star Trek role what role do you think would best suit him?
  • Shatner: Voice of the computer so we wouldn't have to deal with him on the set?
  • User 1: Remember that if you get to Supernatural, he might have you play a demon :)
  • Shatner: I'm pretty sure that the good folks at Supernatural would not listen to Mr. Collins input. It's obvious he's a troublemaker from his latest FB post on the April Fools joke.
  • --
  • User 2: Bill, do you watch Game of Thrones? If so, who's your favorite character?
  • Shatner: No, I have enough trouble keeping current on the CW shows lately.
  • User 3: Do you have a favorite, and why is it Supernatural?
  • Shatner: Did I say it was Supernatural?
  • User 3: I'm just being hopeful =p
  • Shatner: There's a lot of shows on the CW
  • --
  • User 4: The Shat! That sounded bad...What is one thing you wish you could go back and redo?
  • Shtatner: Ignore the Clock People?
  • --
  • User 5: I thought it was hilarious when one of the Anti-Misha on twitter folks tried to tell you that you didn't understand the fandom.
  • Shatner: A lot of his fans are young and they think that an old guy like me doesn't understand their crazy obsessive behavior.
  • --
  • User 6: How many spots do you have left on the GISHWHES team? And are you in it to win it?! Because the competition is fierce.
  • Shatner: A couple but we have a lot of applications.
  • --
  • User 7: Would you guest star on Supernatural? Please?!
  • Shatner: Only if Jared or Jensen asks. ;-)
  • User 7: What. Not Misha? :( He'll be so sad
  • Shatner: Who?
  • --
  • User 3: I love watching all the CW actors get excited that you're watching their shows. It's kind of heart warming or something.
  • Shatner: I love interacting with most of the CW actors. They are in SciFi shows so it's a good cross section with those that follow me.
  • --
  • User 8: Are you looking forward to GISHWHES this year? Have you read up on the lists for previous hunts? There's been some crazy shit, Misha is insane.
  • Shatner: I am looking forward to it. I have some surprises in store for Mr. Collins. Two can play at the crazy game (and I have insider help!)
  • --
  • User 9: How did you get involved in this whole auction/GISHWHES thing, did Misha trick you into it? Is there any Doctor Who stuff?
  • Shatner: The clock people last year. And then Mr. Collins threatened to make me a part of it this year so I decided to join the hunt to win it, meet him and make him pay.
  • User 9: You go then! Will be cheering you on. Watch out for that Misha guy though, he can be crafty.
  • Shatner: Crafty? He can do crafts? Maybe I should put him on my team? ;-)
  • User 9: Ply him with Romulan wine and he does origami. Or so I hear....
  • Shatner: I heard he knits during shooting breaks and then macramés on the weekends.
  • --
  • User 9: For those of us not on a GISHWHES team is there anyway to help out a team like yours?
  • Shatner: I'm sure that I will be asking for help. I have a few ringers already lined up who have said that they will help me thwart the evil angel.
  • User 9: I think one of the items on the hunt is his copy of Busty Asian beauties from the show. Heard he kept it....
  • Shatner: That's digusting!
  • --
  • User 10: Have a bucket list? If so what's one thing you really want to knock off?
  • Shatner: Misha? Too easy! ;-)

I’m so happy to see Jensen and Misha teaming up for You Are Not Alone. Now, that’s the way to leverage something like a PCA for best chemistry into something good and positive for the fans. Destiel is the most popular ship on the show and one of the most popular in any fandom (and that’s without even getting started on the adorableness that is Cockles) so it’s great to see that chemistry have such a positive impact on the fandom. 

This feels like such a great way to build on the work that Misha, Jared and Jensen have already started. Misha began with RAK, which is a great and broad organization trying to change the world one act of kindness at a time. But, I think these guys have all heard so many heartbreaking and inspiring stories from fans dealing with mental illness and depression that this was such a logical way to build upon RAK and AKF. 

First, we should be kind to others, spread love and kindness around in our lives (the mission of RAK). Next, turn that kindness inwards and love ourselves (the mission of AKF). And now, we should combine those two missions to support one another in fighting mental illness and depression (YANA). I love it! This is what fandom should be. 

Supernatural JIBCON7 Misha Collins

AMisha answering a fan’s question regarding Castiel’s emotional health:  Cas needs some time away from dealing with things like the darkness and the apocalypse and stuff like that because its extremely stressful, yeah the apocalypse causes a lot of anxiety. i think Cas needs for his emotional healing to take place what he isn’t going to get a vacation. They don’t do a lot of vacations on supernatural have you noticed that. why is that (sic) we should do a whole vacation season. what if season 12 is like its all shot in Hawaii and the Bahamas (sic) that would be great while giving him a massage maybe…

*imitating Sam* you are important, we love you, you are important Cas…more oil…is that too much pressure is it okay…*imitating Castiel* it’s fine, Sam just.. And then everybody would be like You are queer baiting the fans. No no, it’s just a simple massage scene for his emotional health, i can’t believe you are going to read that into it. I am gonna get shit for that, yeah. Damn it!


Fan:

 Do you feel the influence of Cas on your life or do you feel like you lead two lives like castiel is an angel and you are a human obviously…unfortunately (sic)


Misha: If i am at home and the kids are making a mess or something i will snap my fingers or go like this to try to whatever i don’t know try to stop or explode one of them and it doesn’t work. oh that’s right i am not i am not Castiel or you know, if one of the kids is sick or something i will just touch them on the forehead like that and nothing happens its just frustrating i try to teleport you know and that doesn’t work. (sic)

No is the answer if i am honest with you i don’t forget that i am not an angel very often but its is interesting for me to observe that i meet people who kind of confuse me with Castiel like they start to think that i am an angel or that i can heal people or things like that which i mean i do have powers of healing…


Fan: Which version of Cas has been your favorite and which one the most challenging


Misha: my favorite was playing Misha in the french mistake (sic) everyone was doing a parody of themselves there was a tiny bit of truth in each of the character like Jared has a whole herd of alpacas, its interesting if i am in a foreign country a small portion of people think i am serious all the time and people right now are going oh Misha said Jared and Gen really have a herd of alpacas which is true he does (sic)

I did my best to portray myself as the quintessential doucebag actor and my manager saw the episode and he’s like it was so great to finally see you play yourself so i fired him

Misha in response to a fan: Is that not the answer you were looking for She looks super disappointed I am not going to another Misha panel. fucking asshole!

Fan: How do you feel having Rob on set

Misha: I love having Rob back because Jared and Jensen harass him when we are on set instead of me and its so nice we were shooting a scene we were all there and then it was time for Rob’s closeup camera was on his face he had a big important scene for him and Jared just put his hand on Rob’s thigh (sic) and I was laughing I was just enjoying it happening to somebody else but I knew what he was going through so I put my hand on his thigh too as sign of support just to show solidarity with him because I knew he was going through a lot.

Fan: If your kids ever watched you play an angel

Misha: The kids have seen little dolls of me they have seen drawings of me they have seen tiny tiny clips caught on screen but I don’t let them watch supernatural because I think they are already pre-disposed to be serial killers but west came to a convention recently…and it was fun for me to have him there by the got to see something that is not good for a kid which is…

*imitating fans* Oh my god oh my god its Misha oh my god I love you so much fake sobbing I love you,  so and for him he’s like what the fuck is going on looking around surprised who are all these other women who my dad is having a relationship with so yeah every once in a while around the house Castiel’s shirts (sic) we would get gifts stuff like that which I typically don’t wear outside the house which would make me look a little egoistical so I just wear them in the home but he would pick up a shirt and wear it on… Castiel shirt *imitates West* I am Castiel everybody loves me* …no they don’t but although they do like yesterday when I was away…they were in Castiel’s clothes which is kind of sad because they are using a fictitious character I play as a surrogate for their real father who has clearly abandoned them I do think that’s probably something that will be  talked about with a therapist at some future

anonymous asked:

prompt Bellarke AU: Clarke's a princess trapped in a tower. Finn is a prince and wants to marry her, so he blackmails Bellamy (the best knight of the kingdom) into rescuing her (''Shrek'')

A|N: This took me a ridiculously long amount of time to write? I’m so sorry for the wait, I just dithered over it for so long. Anyway, I hope you like it!

It begins, like most fairy tales do, with a princess.

Fairy tale is a stretch, really. It’s more of a cautionary one. He tells Octavia a different version of the story though, likes to alter it so the princess has a happy ending, and if not happy, well, at least a hopeful one.

Bellamy thinks he’ll tell her the truth when she’s older: the story of their neighbours, once prosperous, now a ruined kingdom, and also of the slain king as well as the princess. Some say she survived, and she’s still languishing in her tower, guarded by a fearsome dragon.

He sees the castle sometimes, especially when they’re training in the highest tower- a red smudge in the distance, flag with the symbol of a Griffin smudged with dirt, tiles of the roof smattered with blood- Miller likes to look out for the dragon, but they never see it.

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A Bargain With The Devil: Why Katniss HAD To Vote Yes To A Games For Capitol Children

In chapter three of Mockingjay, Katniss meets with Coin and gives the president a list of conditions that must be met in order for her to take on the role of Mockingjay. These include: keeping Buttercup in Thirteen, hunting with Gale on the surface, Peeta’s and the other captured victor’s immunity, and thrown in at the last minute, killing Snow. Katniss insists these terms must be announced publicly.

Coin agrees to these terms. However, when the president announces them to the residents of Thirteen and the refugees from Twelve she adds a stipulation of her own – terms that Katniss never agreed upon but must now abide by if she wants her conditions to be met.

“But in return for this unprecedented request, Soldier Everdeen has promised to devote herself to our cause. It follows that any deviance from her mission, in either motive or deed, will be viewed as a break in this agreement. The immunity would be terminated and the fate of the four victors determined by the law of District Thirteen. As would her own. Thank you.”

In other words, I step out of line and we’re all dead.

When I read these words for the first time it was as if an ominous soundtrack played in my head, “da, da, da, dum” and a loud symbol crashed at the end. Coin had found a way to control Katniss.

Interesting enough, there was no end time spelled out in this oral contract. When exactly was this agreement supposed to be over? And while Coin’s terms clearly spell out a defined punishment should Katniss not follow through, the president’s method of determining if Katniss violated the terms of the agreement were vague. How would Coin determine “deviance of her mission in motive?” “Deed” is obvious because it involves action, but “motive” is subjective because Coin can’t read Katniss’ thoughts.

To answer my first question, I suspect that Katniss assumed that her deal with Coin was only for the duration of the war.  But was the war over when Snow surrendered and Thirteen took charge?

Apparently Coin didn’t think so. On page 366 of Mockingjay, Gale brings Katniss a sheath containing a single arrow.

“I brought this.” Gale holds up a sheath. When I take it, I notice it holds a single, ordinary arrow. “It’s supposed to be symbolic. You firing the last shot of the war.”

I suspect that Coin instructed Gale to bring Katniss the sheath and that Gale is simply repeating Coin’s words. But those words indicate that war isn’t over just yet because Snow is still alive.

After Katniss’ “Goodby Gale” moment, Effie shows up to take her to a special meeting of surviving victors. And one of the first things Coin does at that meeting is to mention the “Mockingjay Deal” as Coin refers to it.

“Wherein Katniss Everdeen agreed to support the rebels in exchange for captured victors’ immunity. Katniss has upheld her side of the bargain, so shall we.”

I think Suzanne Collins wanted to remind readers of this agreement again so that we would understand why Katniss voted “yes” to a final Games using Capitol children.

While Coin says that Katniss has upheld her end of the bargain, what is left unspoken are the words “SO FAR.” Because the terms of the bargain aren’t over until Katniss kills Snow. That’s when the war is finally over – that’s when all of Katniss’ conditions have been met.

When it’s Katniss’ turn to vote for a final Games, I believe she understands that the “Mockingjay deal” is still in play. If she deviates in her support of Coin by voting against the Games, what’s to stop the president from reneging on the immunity of the victors.

Peeta and Annie had just voted “no” to another Games. Coin could use that vote to paint them as Capitol sympathizers. She could go after Katniss not only for a “no” vote but for any number of actions during the war where she didn’t follow protocol.

I suspect when Katniss says that, I weigh my options carefully, think everything through, these are the thoughts going through her head.

S.C. writes:

Keeping my eyes on the rose, I say, “I vote yes…for Prim.”

Roses are symbolic of Snow throughout the story. And what’s Snow’s continual mantra to Katniss throughout the books? I thought we agreed not to lie to each other.

So ironically while staring at the rose (which symbolizes Snow) the girl who has stated she’s a bad liar, who has been told by others that she can’t lie, votes “yes” and lies to Coin by implying her vote is meant to revenge her sister’s death. But her “yes” vote also ensures that she has kept her side of the “Mockingjay deal.” It was an expedient decision to keep Peeta, Annie, and even herself safe from retribution.

The first time I read the book I was floored by Katniss’ “yes” vote – a vote that was in direct violation to every value she cared about. I must admit it took me several re-reads to pick up on all the clues and figure out what was going on.

I don’t believe Katniss had it in mind to kill Coin instead of Snow at this point. I honestly think that was a spur of the moment decision. But I do think that if she had killed Snow, she would have done everything in her power to stop another Games from happening.

Thanks @everlarkedalways for this re-read. On to chapter 5 and 6.

I just can’t deal with him okay!!!
I mean srly Misha?!

*SPREAD ‘gossip’ (I take that as an euphemism) or someone’s legs?

*Why talk about Jensen’s knees in the first place?

*Why call attention to his bow legs? Unless you were recalling a delicious memory…

*What a way to flirt with the bae (so smooth)

*Someone likes that ‘restraining order’ and gap between them

*i wonder if Jensen blushed when he saw this tweet…

*apparently someone likes to be what keeps those knees apart…


COCKLES IS GROWING STRONGER…

JibCon is having its effects already. God help us~

It’s interview time with @shesasurvivor! This is some good stuff, so read on my fellow fandom friends. There’s a fun little game at the end. :) We want to thank @papofglencoe for creating our new author banners! Udabomb Pbg


So what does a day in your life look like?

Well, most of the year, it’s get up, work out, head to work, come home, study, go to bed, rinse and repeat. I’m still trying to figure out a way to fill my days after work during summer vacation, though.

So you’re in college?

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anonymous asked:

so whats the deal with william shatner and misha collins? im just wondering because i just see shatner tweet ALOT about him and im just curious are they good friends?

Yes, they are. I’m not sure how long they’ve been friends but it’s really cute. 

I think their friendship might have started around the time of these tweets

We’re all waiting for the day he shows up in a Supernatural episode, there’s been interest expressed on both sides. He’s also replied to a few Misha-haters on twitter and sent a Tweet to the CW when Misha was waiting on a season 10 contract, it basically said they were idiots if they didn’t offer him another season.

Here’s what he’s been tweeting today (he’s not at VegasCon with them, he’s doing the Wizard World Con in Raleigh)

I don’t know why, but at some point Shatner started calling Misha Cupcake, and now it’s Cuppers

kisses are too intimate: a soulmate au 1/?

I’m posting this after the longest time of procrastination and because I am on break in three weeks. This means I’ll get time to finish this fic! It’s going to be a long multi-chapter and it’s the first in a long series of Soulmate AUs. This entire fic is dedicated to natromxnov and bellsarks for being the best betas and best friends that any writer can ask for. Without them, this fic would not exist. As always, feedback is very much welcome.

  • Fandom: The 100
  • Pairings/Characters: Bellarke, Mostly the whole of the The 100-verse (except for most of the Grounders)
  • Chapters: One | Two ?
  • Summary: When her position as CEO of Griffin Empire is threatened, she must Bond as soon as possible to save it but her mother’s failed Bonding has put Clarke off romance forever. Bellamy Blake has always wanted revenge and when Griffin Empire’s scandals are revealed, he finds his opportunity. A cold, hard, practical business arrangement is drawn up. It’s all fun, games and getting what they both want when one of them discovers that they are Soulmates and another discovers an ulterior motive. It begins with a crumbling empire and Finn Collins being a prick. Features: an adorable Monty Green, a rowdy wolf-pack, Raven Reyes being the best friend anyone can have and the adults messing everything up.
  • Rating: Mature
  • Chapter Word Count: 3669
  • Total Word Count: 6568
  • Status: In Progress

APRIL 8

EXCLUSIVE: GOLDEN BOY TALKS ICE QUEEN

Finn Collins speaks to Soulmate Daily in an exclusive expose about his relationship with Clarke Griffin, detailing all the dirty business behind the scenes and everything you wanted to know about our resident Ice Queen.

Two weekends ago, the couple was spotted attending the Unity Day Ball separately. Collins had attended with an unnamed brunette girl while Clarke flew solo. They barely spoke to one another and Clarke appeared to have spent the evening by Raven Reyes’ side. An inside source reveals the Golden Couple is done and it’s not a temporary separation. Our hearts are broken but as always, we have the interview for you.

SD: Let’s jump straight in, Finn. You once said Clarke was your soulmate. Two years is a really long time to date someone. What changed?

Finn Collins: She told me she didn’t want a relationship. She said she didn’t even think we were soulmates. She had this weird idea we would Bond just so we wouldn’t have to find our soulmates. She thought I was on the same page which is really weird because I’ve been hinting for the past couple of months that we should Bond. I couldn’t let my feelings get played that way so I left.

SD: I’m so sorry it happened to you, Finn. I can imagine it must have been really tough dating Clarke Griffin. I’ve heard she can be really cold and it’s not just her Ice Queen act. Let’s hear your side of it.

Finn Collins: She’s also extremely calculating and ruthless. [Laughs] Cold might be the correct word to describe Clarke but let me tell you, she was fire in bed. She knew how to make a man pray to God with that mouth of hers. I always joked that she had had a lot of practice but she never said anything about it. She just smiled her beautiful smile.

SD: Phew, that’s scandalous, Finn. But you still haven’t answered the question. What was it like dating Clarke?

Finn Collins: What can I say? I’m good at what I do. [Laughs] Dating Clarke was like dealing with two persons at once and you’ll never know whom you get. One minute, she can be absolutely amazing. She’ll make you dance around her living room. And the next, she’s all glaring and yelling for you to leave her alone. It wasn’t easy. I thought I loved her. I do, actually but I have to do what’s best for me. She was sucking the life out of me and I didn’t want that kind of a relationship. There’s no pleasing her. Clarke Griffin is the kind of girl you have while waiting for your soulmate to come along

SD: I heard that she was married to her job. After all, you can’t be that successful without being devoted.

Finn Collins: Don’t even get me started on the amount of hours she spent in that office of hers. I’d plan a wonderful romantic dinner and just as I am about to pick her up, she tells me she’s too busy and that she’ll reschedule. When I go to visit, sometimes, she barely looks at me. After sex, she doesn’t even cuddle. She just goes straight back to work like I was some sort of cheap booty call. I guess it’s because she never considered me her soulmate and that explains why she’s always avoided the romance of our relationship.

SD: But the two of you are always together seen together. You went to Rome last year and Paris the year before that. There was the Jaha’s annual soiree and the Blake Industries Fund Raiser. That doesn’t scream non-romance to me.

Finn Collins: Oh, Clarke is the master of putting up fronts. She can smile and preen and dance for the cameras but once we’re behind doors, she drops it all. Until I get her into bed, of course. It’s the only time I ever see any real emotion from her. To Clarke, sex is a temporary distraction and solution.

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