this is unhealthy i think

Snarkiness aside I truly believe these people are unwell. I think we’ve all had unhealthy attachments at some point but this shit takes the cake. Up until relatively recently I’ve only thought it was sorta funny and strangely admirable in how intensely devoted people were to convincing themselves and others that Gillian and David are dating. Even with that said I don’t care if anyone feels attacked by this post. I mean, people feel attacked by HMSGillian for fuck sake.
I think my attitude towards it shifted because my technically-but-not-really President and his administration openly deny facts and think anyone who dares to question him is the enemy. I’m far from being the most politically astute person in the room but this kind of mentality is terrifying regardless of the subject. 

It’s unhealthy, batshit, and/or stupid:
- to dismiss Gillian and David’s own denials of a romantic relationship between them then act as if someone slandered Gillian’s name because they suggested she may be joking when posting a photoshopped image of David’s face on her latex covered body
This “its insulting to Gillian to think she’s joking all of the time” type of shit. 

- to think a very private person is sending messages thru social media or comic con shirts. (does this really need to be said?)

- to righteously think you know which complete stranger is better for another complete stranger.

- to simultaneously champion her as an independent and intelligent woman but act as if she’s a naive 15yo girl who needs to be protected from her own romantic choices

- to think you know how they would answer an interview question depending on their marital status. (example: “David would have politely corrected the interviewer if Gillian wasn’t his girl so she must be”) Uh, confirmation bias anyone?

- to spend hours tracking down a damn bracelet, finding one that looks similar, assuming it’s correct, then deducing (because of the price tag) that only one specific person could have possibly given it to her

- to spend days wallowing in bed at the thought that a relationship that isn’t yours may have ended. If it even existed to begin with

- to surmise their Twitter usage (or lack of) is evidence they’re spending time together

- basically damn near everything that gets used as evidence of Gillovny is fucking stupid. They just take something and refuse any other explanation. (”Gillian didn’t have to wear a Schmoopie shirt so it must have been for David.”)

Whether she’s with Peter or not the “cross promotion” thing sorta seemed plausible at the beginning but it’s ridiculous at this point. Cross promotion obviously happens and its obvious when it does happen. When was the last time it was done in this manner? And it’d be heavily skewed towards the show that the network spent 100M+ dollars on already. Gillian, let’s be honest, is not the biggest star in America. You use actors in the show to promote the show. She’s talked about The Crown solely thru social media so why attend premieres and award shows? The nominations/wins is enough to promote the show. The premieres would be covered in the press even without Gillian’s presence.

anonymous asked:

How often do you eat more processed foods like bread/pasta? Do you consider them as unhealthy?

With food I go through phases as people probably can tell hahaha so for a few weeks I’ll be obsessed with pasta and then a few weeks i’ll be obsessed with black beans and quinoa.. etc. So I could have pasta any day I feel like it really, pasta is great and super nutritious, I get a whole grain pasta like buckwheat or spelt :)

Bread not really that often as It’s not something I buy (taste/meal preference) unless I’m making burgers or a sandwich but I buy wraps weekly and have those throughout the week. I don’t think bread and pasta is unhealthy unless it’s super refined like white bread and white pasta as the nutrients are stripped from it.

If you want to eat pasta and bread it’s always best to go for something with a lot of grains and seeds + wholegrain pasta. Much better for nutrients and your digestion :)

anonymous asked:

I'm the Saturn in 12th anon. My pluto squares Saturn. What you said described me pretty well, unfortunately. I take life way too seriously. But is it wrong that i believe more in myself than i believe in the stars?

No. No, it’s definitely not. In fact I would say it’s better. With astrology, everything is up to your interpretation. And it’s a tool, not a religion.
I’d say you should always, always believe in yourself the most. Don’t let astrology control your life. A lot of people take this practice way too seriously, and I think that can easily become very unhealthy and detrimental.
I’m proud of you that you believe more in yourself.

Do you enjoy this Mofftiss?

The hype is real
I feel like the clock moves in slow motion
My heart rate is off the limit
I can’t sleep
I can’t eat
I can’t chill
I’m trembling
I can hear Benedict Cumberbatch’s voice whispering “I love you”

Do you think that is unhealthy?

Me: *talking about shadowhunters*
Friend: I think your obsession is a bit unhealthy
Me: yeah… anyways, shadowhunters

my advice for all young runners and even you college runners who still idolize other college runners, is STOP. stop going along with flotrack’s (who consequently are super rude about any other runner who doesn’t meet their superstar requirements) obsession of the year and putting all these people who are close to your age on pedestals. Admire their hard work, their talent, their times - but don’t you dare put them up so high that you start worshipping them and see their level of running as something that you can’t achieve. 

joyedtobeforlorn  asked:

how do you feel about dirkjake?

man i never thought i’d get into the dirkscourse in december of 2016 but here i am

i think their relationship throughout act 6 was unhealthy and fraught with problems, but i don’t think it was abusive. i think the interpretation of dirk as jake’s abuser is somewhat valid and has a small amount of evidence behind it, but most of the textual evidence contradicts that, and it’s not the interpretation i subscribe to.

much of my opinion on this was formed by reading this four-part essay, which is long but well-written, and definitely worth reading: part one, part two, part three, part four.

you can read the parts in whatever order you want, if you’re not up to tackling it all at once. the essay is backed up by a huge amount of evidence and i really appreciate how sympathetic and understanding the writer is when discussing the opposing point of view.

i think one of the reasons dirkjake was so discourse-y was because while act 6 was happening, it was really hard to take in the full picture. i read a lot of act 6 as an archival reader, and even then it was hard to figure out who was responsible for what. one of the core problems in dirk and jake’s relationship was the muddle between dirk and his proxies — the fandom would read a recent update, go “oh my god!!! i can’t believe dirk would do something so awful!” only to realize later that “dirk” was really AR. that initial impression would linger, and many people would argue, “well, the AR is just his personality in a different form, right? and even if they’re separate beings, isn’t the AR still dirk’s fault?”

both of those beliefs are fundamentally unfounded, and i would explain why, but i’m worried i’ll fuck it up… so instead PLEASE go read those essays, they’re so good.

another core reason dirkjake became so fraught with discourse was because of the habit of taking homestuck characters at face value. to quote that essay i love so goddamn much:

“Dirk is assigned a lot more competency than he really deserves. But in reality, most of Dirk’s narrative is focused on all the ways Dirk finds himself losing control… As far as manipulative masterminds go, Dirk is a failure. He fails at executing his plans continually, spectacularly, and with catastrophic consequences. He’s not good at multitasking and he’s not particularly great at orchestrating the kids’ entry to the session (the AR does most of that). And yet, for many Homestuck fans, he takes the lion’s share of the credit (and the blame) for the ridiculous time-loop he participates in during [S] Unite and [S] Synchronize.”

tl;dr — people interpret dirk a puppetmaster because he presents himself that way — he tells everyone he knows what he’s doing because he wishes he were.

i’m hard-pressed to think of a single character in the comic whose outward facade matches their true self. no one, not even john, is completely honest about themselves.

one thing that essay doesn’t tackle is: many people view dirk as an abuser because at one point, he thinks he is one.

dirk obviously has depression. at one point he attempts to destroy the AR, and by proxy himself, in a crippling bout of suicidal ideation. that sequence of events is where a lot of fans get to say “but even he admits he was abusive to jake!”

but i’m not sure why everyone just takes that statement at face value.

when i see a character saying “i hate myself, i ruin the lives of everyone i care about” while the story shows that they were not at fault (PLEASE read those essays), i don’t think “wow, they’re such an awful person,” i think “wow, they have depression.”

finally, i’d like to note one more thing.

i believe that fiction should be evaluated separately from the creator’s intent, so i don’t think hussie’s intention should determine whether or not you interpret dirkjake as abusive (as opposed to unhealthy for other reasons). but i seriously doubt hussie intended to portray dirk as an abuser.

homestuck is a comic where female characters are just as nuanced as male characters, where the longest-lasting and healthiest romantic relationship is between two girls, where the villains embody heteromasculine ideals and the heroes have beautifully written, thoughtful coming-out narratives. why on earth would andrew hussie upturn that by writing in dirk strider as the gay predator archetype? how the hell does homestuck, of all pieces of media, accommodate a storyline about a gay teen as a cruel, manipulative predator who abuses other teenagers into fulfilling his sexual desires? it makes no sense.

i want to be clear, since this is easy to take the wrong way in wonderful discourse-filled tumblr land — i’m not saying that believing that dirkjake was abusive makes you homophobic, or that it makes you the kind of person who buys into those narratives. it’s not your fault for reading the text differently. you might think that canon includes all that nasty stuff even if you would’ve done differently if you were in hussie’s shoes.

and if dirk and jake’s dynamic reminds you of abuse you’ve experienced yourself, then i’m not asking you to somehow undo your triggers or your perception of their relationship for the sake of understanding my argument. they’re just fictional characters, after all.

and if you want to argue with me about my opinion, or present evidence to the contrary, please do! i love talking about this stuff, and if i’ve forgotten something crucial or am just plain wrong, i’ll try to acknowledge it.

at the moment though, i personally, fervently believe that dirk and jake’s arc is not about abuse. it’s about another core theme of homestuck: the dangers of forcing too many expectations onto yourself, the dangers of trying to become an idealized version of yourself instead of accepting your own imperfections. you see it in terezi, in vriska, in rose, in karkat, in dave, in virtually every single character, including jake english and dirk strider.

beyond all the problems of dirk’s splinter selves, what tore dirk and jake’s relationship apart was emotional distrust and an inability to communicate. dirk couldn’t show jake emotion or vulnerability once they were together in person because he was terrified that by letting go of his image as ultra-competent and infallible, he would be failing jake — and jake couldn’t communicate his anxiety about their relationship because he was terrified of being any less than the superhuman movie hero he wanted to be.

i’ll end by reiterating that you really really really should read those essays, and also this reconciliation fic by the same author; they’re both fantastic and nuanced and wonderfully written.

aaaaaaand that’s it, that’s my dirkscourse, folks!

So, to recap
  • Killian was abandoned by his father. 
  • Regina was abused by her mother. 
  • Zelena was abandoned by both parents and abused by her adoptive father.
  • Rumple was abandoned by both parents and later taunted and assaulted by both parents. 
  • Neal was abandoned by both parents.
  • Ruby was abandoned by both parents (or forcibly taken by her grandmother).
  • Graham was abandoned by both parents to be eaten by wolves.
  • Emma was given up by her birth parents and given up by one of her foster families.
  • Henry was given up by his birth mother and gaslighted by his adoptive mother.
  • David was neglected by his alcoholic father.
  • Cora was neglected by her alcoholic father.
  • Archie was exploited by his parents.

every single time i put unhealthy things into my body i think to myself “i could lose so much weight, be so much healthier, feel so much better if i just didn’t do this” and then what do i do? nothing.

"RED FLAG” SYNASTRY ASPECTS (PART 1)

Synastry can be a confusing subject to look at. It’s already confusing enough to look at your natal chart, imagine how confusing it’d be to combine your natal chart with another person’s! In a synastry calculator, you can be very confused with what you see. So many lines, so many aspects to look at.

Aspects is a very important component in synastry. It’s the connections your planets make to your partner’s. It gives insight to the interactions between you two. While there’s some free-flowing, easy aspects, there’s some hard, challenging ones.

And sometimes, if not managed correctly, challenging aspects can turn into toxic, unhealthy aspects.

A little disclaimer before I list such aspects. Everybody has their own idea of what a “red flag” synastry aspect could be. This is just my opinion on what I think would be toxic and unhealthy. And if you find that you and partner have one of these challenging aspects, don’t just throw your relationship out the door. Every relationship is challenging, and to just completely throw away a relationship just because you see a challenging aspect is foolish. It’s your relationship. Don’t let the stars determine your actions. I personally have one of the “red flag” aspects below, but remember that challenging aspects can also turn to transforming, powerful aspects in a good way!

  1. Moon Square or Opposite Saturn - In this aspect, it can be argued that the Moon person will be mainly harmed, but I believe both people with this aspect will be hurt. The Saturn person will feel that the Moon person is constantly irresponsible, scolding and criticizing the Moon person like a child. The Moon person feels emotionally damaged by this, and if not handled correctly, the Moon person will eventually sensor what he/she says to the Saturn person while the Saturn person will eventually be in the dark. The Moon person could eventually be depressed with the relationship while the Saturn person will not be satisfied.
  2. Mars Square or Opposite Pluto - This aspect is notoriously known as one of the most dangerous synastry aspects a couple could have. There is definitely a strong, notable aggressive attitude the Mars and Pluto person possesses while they are presented in different ways. Arguments can be quite explosive within this pairing, since both people are too stubborn and aggressive to give in. If the two individuals are physically violent, this aspect can show violence and abuse. However, if there isn’t any signs in the charts of each of individual, abuse and violence is not likely to occur.
  3. Mars Square or Opposite Saturn - Unlike the Moon Square or Opposite Saturn aspect, this aspect can negatively manifest into something more violent. With the disciplinary, harsh, and criticizing tendencies of Saturn, the Saturn person will most likely criticize the Mars person for everything they do since Mars is the planet of energy, and everything requires energy. The Mars person could have a need to rebel and openly act against the Saturn person while the Saturn person would have a stronger need to restrict the Mars person. Since Saturn is a planet that represents longevity, this aspect wouldn’t manifest early in a romantic relationship, but rather later into the relationship when both people are comfortable with each other.
  4. Venus Square or Opposite Uranus - In this aspect, the Uranus person will most likely want their relationship with the Venus to be as spontaneous and interesting as possible. However, the Venus person may want romantic structure in the relationship and the Uranus person can resent this. In romantic situations, it can be quite erratic and inconstant, making the relationship quite unsteady and dramatic, especially for the Venus person. Sometimes, the Uranus person can be romantically or emotionally distant from the Venus person.
  5. Venus Square of Opposite Pluto - There is a strong powerful struggle between the Venus and Pluto person. The Pluto person is likely to dominant over the Venus person, and sometimes, this can be hard for the Venus person to accept. The Pluto person can also be quite possessive and jealous when it comes to the Venus person. While there is a strong attraction between the two, the relationship between the two could be quite an emotional rollercoaster. If an relationship were to end between the Venus and Pluto person, the chances of repeating the relationship is slim due to the overpowering passion between the two.

I will probably make a part two of this when I find more aspects!

there are moments i lament getting older or get sucked into unhealthy levels of vanity, and to snap out of them i think about carrie fisher last year: “youth and beauty are not accomplishments”.

and then i remember that i’ll age however i’m meant to age, that i’m an actual person that can do and achieve things (and has done and has achieved things), and, of course, that i should take my dog everywhere with me

I know not everyone will agree with this but, while I’m proud of Taylor for having had the courage to pull herself away from an unhealthy situation, I think people should be careful labeling a relationship “abusive” when they don’t know the full story. Using the word “abuse” without truly meaning it in its full sense greatly deteriorates its power, and it decreases the credibility of actual victims of abuse. Nobody in this fandom knows whether or not Taylor was emotionally or physically abused just by observing a relationship through pictures or interpreting song lyrics. Good lyrics never give away real answers. Keep in mind that each person who dedicated time and devotion to this relationship as an outsider has their own reaction or interpretation of what happened. The only people who truly know the entire situation are Taylor and Adam. The only “wrong” reaction someone could have is harassing someone else for having a different perspective.

THE GANG ON A ROADTRIP

i love roadtrips and I think about these way more than i probably should so
also these are probably gonna be more modern ok cool leggo

-never trust soda with the aux cord
-or two bit he once played all the spongebob songs for three hours
-pony is the person that divides the space in the the car by the inch….. Like “no Johnny that’s your side, you’ve crossed my side by .5 centimeters back the fuck up”
-they play the yellow car game, Darry is the long term champ
-they also play a game to see who can get the most semi trucks to honk at them by doing the arm thing (like when u move it up and down and ur hand is in a fist u get me???) Steve is winning at this one and has successfully woken everyone up in the dead of night three times
-darry loves getting snow globes !!
-pony aka the mother fucker who “didn’t have to go pee” but twenty minutes later has to and makes everyone so mad
-everyone switches off for driving, except Dallas because he is the shittiest driver E V E R
-two bit telling everyone he’s from England and having a really convincing accent; a lot of times the rest of the gang will join him
-they’ve literally gotten so many people’s numbers because of it
-the gang is generally more happy and all together because Darry finally got off work and pony/two/Johnny is out of school and no one is stressed!!
-they have two rules: when visiting someplace new, always try one of their milkshakes (and don’t give soda the aux seriously don’t )
-bucket hats
-“we went to ____ and all we got was this lousy ____”
-they get one of those drawings of themselves done u know the cartoony ones with like chalk or something idk what they’re called but
-johnny making sure they hit all the tourist spots so they get the full experience™ -everyone mocking the gps

Shit people siding with abusers and abuse apologists say:

  • You can’t blame them for everything (watch me)
  • I’m sure they didn’t mean it that way (oh are u. are u sure. are u su)
  • I’m sure if you talk to them… (mate)
  • You just need to try harder! (MATE)
  • It can’t all be their fault (um)
  • They’re a HUMAN BEING (debatable)
  • You can’t blame them, they’ve had a rough childhood/life (so did I thanks to them)
  • It takes two to tango (do you think tango is on the list of child abuse)
  • You’re abusing them too. (i fucking wish)
  • Think of all the good things they’ve done for you! (yeah why don’t you fight their battles allison)
  • They only want the best for you! (ooh do they. do they really. do the)
  • It’s godly to forgive. (aren’t you being a deity lately jackson)
  • You need to stop thinking about this, it’s unhealthy for you (i bet you said that bc you’re worried about my health and not bc you don’t wanna help me get out of abuse or hear me out at all)
  • They really love you. (get out of my face with your equating abuse with love and confront your own abuse already)
  • They’re just worried about you. (yea about me outing their abuse)
  • They seem like a good person tho! (yea thats whats so terrifying about them I wish they walked around with a scythe and shouted obscenities)
  • You took all of this too seriously. (thanks for not taking my life seriously)
  • You took all of this too personally. (it fucking happened to me personally)
  • It’s time to stop holding on to past grudges (wow i am glad I let you make all my decisions for me surely you have my well being in mind)
  • Think about why this is all your fault. (wow are you trying to woo my abuser to marry you)
  • It couldn’t have been that bad. (u know what i wish i could transfer my symptoms directly to you lets see how bad is it then)
  • They aren’t that bad, give them a chance. (yeah why not give the person who shot at me another bullet what could possibly go wrong)
  • They can change. (yea they’re definitely changing to worse continually)
  • They’ve changed. (buddy i am glad you are not the target of their abuse but could you for a second consider that I am also a human being)
  • It’s because you did “x”! (oh no you got me people deserve to be abused if they do “x”! How did I not consider that before, abuse is totes justified!)
  • It’s because you overreacted. (goodbye i’m not talking to u)
  • You think everything is abuse. (you think its bc i live in abusive environment? nah it can’t be that can it)
  • Think about how they feel! (oh so you too think i exist to cater to their feelings great I’m so happy how I feel is never gonna come up)
  • If you would consider their side for a second. (what do you think i wasted half of my life on jane)
  • They would never do that. (did you not just hear the words out of my mouth telling you they did that)
  • I’m sure they would be nicer if “x” (keep deluding yourself)
  • They’re just having it tough. (and everyone who has it tough gets to have a go at me! I forgot my place is to be a punching bag of the world)
  • You have to love your (family member) abuser. (I did love them.)