this is the worst night of my live

Meet the JSE Community!

(Soo, I’ve been seeing some other people do this and I thought it looked fun so here you go! :D)

Name: Abigail, but people call me Abi!

Age: I am 14! In Year Ten!

Country: The Home of Tea, confusion and “Sorry!”. The United Kingdom.

Appearance: (Here’s a bad drawing with the worst possible lighting. Thanks Winter, *Pssh, you and your early nights*.)

Hobbies: Drawing, writing, browsing the internet, poisoning my friend’s lives by spamming them with either me freaking out over egos or memes, does…daydreaming count..?

What is your dream job? I would love to be a professional writer or animator, I want to create worlds or express them in some way, though it’s pretty unlikely but a gurl can dream! :P

What kind of shit would we find in your bag? Sketch book filled with very bad drawings, an empty milkshake bottle and most likely empty chocolate wrappers. There are no survivors if it involves chocolate. I know no mercy.

How would you describe your personality? Hmm, I’m not sure, i’m a bit loopy and random, I’m a bit loud if I’m comfortable around people, if not then I shrivel up like some anti-social (oh sorry, should I say dark-social?) leaf. I think I’m patient with people and I really like talking with friends, yet I do complain. Like a lot. I blame the Britishness.

When did you find Jack’s channel? It was 2015, August. I was in Legoland (best holiday, I know), in bed, on a Pewdiepie marathon when I reached his Happy Wheels videos. I saw in the suggested and clicked it before reading the author and I almost dropped my phone from the intro being very loud. I was like “Wait, this isn’t Pewdiepie?!” (Pfft.)  But I got addicted to the Happy Wheels series as well as RYC. Soon enough I’d watched most of them and I tried watching the other stuff but the humour didn’t appeal to me because I didn’t understand it at the time and I lost interest. Fast forward to 2016 and Sister Location came out, I was watching Mark’s play through and I saw “Something doesn’t feel right” in the suggested and I saw the septic eyes and I was like “Hey, I remember him! I wonder if he’s changed much!” and immediately fell in love with the channel again and I was so engrossed with what was happening in-game I didn’t notice the glitches, I actually thought they were game noises! When I did, it was when he was running through Ballora’s Gallery, when Anti started flicking his head back and forth. I remember being so confused! I soon got intrigued and look where I am now! Completely consumed in a community that’s surrounded in lighter fluid while a lighted match just hangs there on a thread. God, I love it! xD

Put in order your top 3 favourite Egos! 

1. Schneep. He’s my German Biscuit.

2. Anti. My little Mean Bean.

3. Robbie. The Purple Cookie-Bean. (Shut up, I love pet names. >:3)

But if we’re talking about the main canon ones then probably Jackie or Chase! But I love ‘em all! Whether some are Canon or not, they’re the little beans! :D

Favourite/ most nostalgic video/series of Jack’s to watch? I’d have to say Happy Wheels, Unravel, Night in the Woods, The Last Guardian and Undertale are my favourite series to watch but my favourite videos are probably That Dragon, Cancer, GORN, Far From Noise and anything with the egos in it! :D

Would you describe yourself as an active member or a quiet member of the community? I am a raging F-A-N-A-T-I-C with this community, if somethin’ happens, I will strike! And I will fangirl either online or to my friends, who…think I’m obsessive or I will scroll endlessly through the depths of the JSE tag and never leave it. But, in a serious note, I love talking with everyone in this community, they’re all so mature and kind, it’s a very positive and up-lifting place to be and for that I thank everyone for it! And thank you Jack for both keeping it that way and letting us be, I guess, free (even with Anti *cough cough*). Great job everyone! <3

Here’s just a bonus I wanted to add.

Funniest Story involving the channel: It was 2017 when he arrived. August. It was five o’clock, I was on Skype with my two friends and I was just recovering from all the social media teases. When…I see Anti. I kid you not I just completely flipped out and started making some demon noises. I just started going “Oh my god oh my god oh my god.” One of my friends, who is more of a Mark fan, was just like “Wait, what!?” And we started watching the video, she skipped ahead by a minute and started questioning who the German guy was (Poor innocent child), I was just freaking out all the way through until Mr. I-Killed-Jack-And-Wield-A-Knife appeared. We caught up to the same point and we were really involved. Until he mentioned “Glitch Bitch”. We just both started LAUGHING. We couldn’t take him seriously, and it got better with “Fuckin’ Circles” because we just said “Watch yo profanity”. My other friend, who does not watch Mark or Jack, was just there, he didn’t even question us, and when the video ended I hear him just let out the longest sigh and then say “Here goes the evening. This is the evening now.”

So, I then spent the next four hours scrolling through Tumblr and flipping out.

Then my first friend, the one who watched the video with me, just randomly went “Glitch Glitch Bitch.” like “Swish Swish Bish” and now that has become a meme between her and I.

There’s this one popular girl in our math class who constantly just randomly sings “Swish Swish Bish” and ever since that night, we always just look at each other and whisper “Glitch Glitch Bitch” whenever she says it. Sooo….yeah…that was probably the best and most eventful evening I’ve gone through so far!

-

Man, I love this community. Sorry this is so long! <3

An incomplete list of the different answers Andrew has given reporters when they have asked why he and his ex-teammate turned rival Neil wear matching armbands:

  • “Kevin’s marking his new exclusive court team with the armbands. So far we’re the only ones picked.”
  • “It only took a few months of knowing him to know he was going to be my mortal enemy, so I marked him with the armbands so everyone would know.”
  • “Neil Josten is a copycat piece of shit with no sense of personal style.”
  • “We’ve been together since university. We secretly live together. We own cats. It’s disgusting.”
  • “The armbands are how Wymack marked the worst troublemakers on his team. Neil was so awful no one managed to rank after him.”
  • “Neil lost a bet and has to wear those armbands for ten years.”
  • “They’re to hide our matching sleeve tattoos from a drunken night his freshman year.”
  • “I forgot about his birthday and had an extra pair lying around so I used them as a shitty present. He’s been wearing them for years. Pathetic.”
  • “What armbands? I have never seen him wear armbands.”
  • “Wymack marked his best players with them. What a shame his own son didn’t earn any. Kevin cried the day Neil got his.”
  • “Which one’s Neil again? Is he that really tall dealer? No? Then who am I thinking of?”
  • “Nicky gave us the same gifts every year because apparently ‘we are impossible to shop for’.”
  • “Wymack marked the players that smoke with armbands ‘as black as our lungs are going to turn’ to try to shame us into quitting.”
  • “They used to be friendship bracelets, but now they mark my burning hatred for him.”
  • “Neil Josten changes his appearance so suddenly and extremely, we had to mark him so we would recognize him when he showed up to practice. I guess he got used to wearing them.”
  • “Neil’s so pale if his arms see direct sunlight, he gets third degree burns. No one knows why. It’s just his arms. Doctors are stumped.”
  • “He stole them from me years ago and wears them at all times to taunt me. And so that I can’t steal them back.”
  • “He hides knives in them. He’s a real danger to himself and everyone around him. I can’t believe no one’s stopped him yet.”

No one fully believes any of the answers and they’re all taken as sarcastic.

harryyyyypotterrrr  asked:

Okay so helppp. Everyone seems to have a hc that Draco and Harry are roommates in 8th year and when there’s Music and Moonlight and Love and Romance n all that ish and it’s trés cute but BUT. Nobody seems to have considered the concept of Weasel and Ferret sharing a dorm!? Pining!Harry, Pining!Draco, extremely stressed annoyed and hilarious Ron! Ron becomes matchmaker a la FGS MALFOY SHUT UP ABOUT HARRY FOR A SECOND WONT YOU and then they date and Ron is congratulated and bondingg and help me aa

OKAY but this is an amazing headcanon!!!!!! 

  • Harry’s really jealous when roommates are assigned, because he wanted to room with Ron of COURSE, what are you talking about?? Why else would he possibly be upset??
  • Harry encourages Ron to bitch about Draco’s annoying habits because he’s dying to know exactly what it would be like to live with him
  • ”Malfoy sleeps NAKED?! Fuck, that’s ho— aaah— horrible. I can’t believe you get to— I mean have to, yes, of course— live with that, Ron.”
  • Harry offers to trade rooms with Ron for a few nights a week because “that’s what friends are for, mate. If you have to suffer Malfoy’s pale skin and cock being on display, then I should get to— HAVE TO suffer it too.”
  • MEANWHILE Draco talks about Harry all the time.
  • ”I bet you wish you were rooming with Potter instead, don’t you? Perfect Potter. He would be the worst roommate. He would throw his clothes all over my bed, and then I would be able to smell him for days on my pillow. Disgusting.”
  • But then one time at like three in the morning Draco randomly starts a genuine conversation with Ron about whether he thinks Potter has forgiven him.
  • Ron is like… “Uh, yeah, mate… I reckon so.”
  • ”What makes you think that???”
  • ”Well… he used to talk about all the evil things he thought you were up to, but now he mostly just talks about your hair”
  • ”Oh…..” *long silence* “well I forgive him too, you know. For the Sectumsempra thing. So you can invite him to our room sometimes. I wouldn’t mind.”
  • Ron rolls over and is about to fall asleep when he realizes exactly what is happening here and just buries his head under his pillow and vows never to emerge
  • Only he does emerge and he invites Harry to his room
  • ”Are you sure I should go now? Malfoy might be in there!”
  • ”Yeah, he is”
  • ”What if I see his cock??”
  • ”You— what— uuuh. Well, then you’ll have seen his cock.”
  • ”Okay let’s go”
  • So then Harry and Ron are hanging out on Ron’s bed while Draco studies at his desk. Until he gets up and announces he needs a nap.
  • Of course as we all know Draco sleeps naked, so he starts slowly stripping off his clothes
  • Harry is like drooling and making weird whimpering noises and just staring so blatantly it’s ridiculous.
  • Ron calmly stands up and walks out the door, shutting it behind him, and neither Harry nor Draco notice.
  • A few hours later, Harry asks Ron what he would think about rooming with Neville again
  • Ron is overjoyed, switches with Harry that very day, and he lives happily ever after
  • except he’s still regularly exposed to naked Malfoy (and Harry now) because those two have no shame at all and they are apparently “too busy” to bother with locks
Yuri on Ice from Yakov’s perspective

Banquet:

 Yuri don’t let yourself get baited into a dance batt- I SAID DON’T GET BAITED INTO A DANCE BATTLE! GODDAMNIT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE MEETING SPONSERS!

Victor! Mila! Stop encouraging them! AND STOP TAKING PICTURES

Victor you’re not even drunk! STOP DANCING WITH THE SLOPPY DRUNK

Why is there a stripper pole in here? Why is this allowed to get out of hand? WHERE THE HELL ARE CHRIS AND THIS DRUNK’S COACHES?!?

Victor! DON’T LET DRUNKS HUMP YOU IN FRONT OF SPONSERS! NO, YOU CAN’T TAKE HIM BACK TO HIS ROOM! I DON’T CARE IF YOU THINK YOU’RE IN LOVE HE’S DRUNK AND YOU’RE AN IDIOT! I’LL TAKE HIM BACK TO HIS ROOM BEFORE YOU MAKE ANY MORE BAD DECISIONS.

- *sends Celestino a strongly worded email about keeping an eye on his pupils in the future the next morning*

Episode One

- Victor stop. Stop pining. You aren’t in love. No I don’t believe in love at first sight and I certainly don’t believe in love at first drunken humping. You’re right I’m not taking this seriously. He hasn’t contacted you because he was DRUNK OUT OF HIS MIND! Did you see how much booze he downed? It’s a wonder he didn’t die of alcohol poisoning. Just stfu and skate.

- Victor no. It’s not a message. Victor no! Don’t give up your career for an ill-advised booty call! UGH if I can’t stop you just make sure our Yuri doesn’t find out where you went.

Episode Two

- WHY ARE YOU IN JAPAN TOO YURI! I COULDN’T STOP VICTOR MAKING AN ILL-ADVISED BOOTY CALL BUT YOU ARE TOO YOUNG TO BE ATTEMPTING THAT! YEAH SURE YOU’RE NOT THERE FOR THAT I’VE SEEN YOUR ROOM! …NO ONE HAS 30 POSTERS OF SOMEONE IN THEIR ROOM BECAUSE THEY ‘HATE THEM JUST SO MUCH’ YOU’RE FOOLING NO ONE KID!

Episode Three

- OMFG did you really give him a program about the night he got sloppy drunk and you turned into even a bigger moron? You’re going to put me into an early grave.

Episode Four

- MILA! STOP POKING THE SMOL ANGRY CHILD! HIS SCREECHING HURTS MY EARS!

- Wait, why the hell do I have to go live with my ex-wife and the angsty teen? I don’t want to have to listen to a list of my failures or a catalogue of all the ways Drunk Yuri is the worst especially as it tends to devolve into ‘stupid pig, how dare he be so good looking’.

Episode Five

- Victor stop trying to pretend this isn’t an elaborate booty call. This is not how coaching works.

Episode Six

- I have the living legend who gave it all up to be a pretend coach in order to get with a sloppy drunk, a sadist of a female skater who stirs up trouble on purpose, an angsty teen who can’t tell the difference between having a crush and hating someone and an emo skater who is far too old to be as emo as he is. Kill me now.

Episode Seven

- Maybe I was giving Victor a disservice. His student is actually doing quite well and maybe they are taking it seriously and HOLY FUCK NEVERMIND JUST KISS YOUR STUDENT IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD VICTOR YOU ASSHAT

Episode Eight

- Yuri has calmed down and I’m just going to ignore Victor. Yep that’ll work OMFG did you HAVE TO KISS HIS FUCKING SKATE?!? THIS IS WHY YOU WEREN’T ALLOWED TO TAKE HIM BACK TO THE HOTEL ROOM! YOU HAVE NO CHILL!

You want me to what? Be his coach? Well…only because I like Maccachin.

Episode Nine

- You’re alright actually, I hereby allow you the name Japanese Yuri instead of Drunk Yuri. You may be the only sane person I know surprisingly. I still am going to tell you off for fucking up though.

- ….I take it all back. WTF was up with all the hugging.

Episode Ten

- …They got engaged. Victor really is going to marry him….I’m not even surprised at this point. Fine. Keep him Japanese Yuri. He’s a pain in the ass anyway.

Episode Eleven

-  YES! I AM A PROUD DAD/COACH! HAPPIEST I’VE BEEN THIS WHOLE YEAR

Episode Twelve

- WTF? You’re coming back now? Idek what’s going on anymore.

- Well done Yuri! I’m so proud of you for winning gold!

- …They are doing a super romantic pairs skate because of course they are.

- Okay so Victor is coming back to Russia to train cool….wait what do you mean you’re still going to coach Japanese Yuri? WTF? HOW WOULD THAT EVEN WORK? WTF NO.

Post Episode Twelve

- STOP FLIRTING IN THE RINK! WHY GOD WHY AM I BEING PUNISHED?

- STOP GROPING HIM VICTOR THERE ARE CHILDREN PRESENT

-  YURI P STOP THROWING THINGS EVERY TIME THEY FLIRT

-  I HATE ALL OF MY CHILDREN SO MUCH.

- YOU’RE ALL THE REASON I HAVE NO HAIR

Pray for Yakov

I don’t miss you as much anymore. Sometimes you cross my mind but not like you use to. I remember when I thought that I couldn’t live without you and looking back on it, you were the best and worst thing that happened to me. Its been hard, its been so hard to get over you but looking back on it time passes, and the more you live your life and create new habits, you get used to not having a text message every morning saying, ‘Hello, beautiful. Good morning.’ You get used to not calling someone at night to tell him how your day was. You replace these old habits with new habits. As time goes on, you get better, but only with time. You still see them and a spark is there, your mind still races when you see them, its going to, you use to love that person with every inch of your soul, with every emotion you could possibly have. Its just not the same anymore.
— 

@livingpreppywearingpearls

Kaitlyne Smith

What its like dating Dick Grayson

-Him being very affectionate. He loves to give forehead kisses, neck kisses, kisses on the cheek and his favorite is kisses on the nose because he loves the way you scrunch up your nose afterwards.

-Him carrying you to bed from the couch when you fall asleep after binge watching ‘How I Met Your Mother’.

-You love his long hair very much and can’t help running your hand through it. Whenever you do, he seizes your hand and kisses it very gently.

-Him calling you ‘babe’ or ‘sweetie’.

-A lot of hot make out sessions.

-Him waking up before you and watching you sleep.

- “Were you watching me sleep?”

- “Yeah, you look so peaceful. I like watching you sleep.”

- “Okay that is very creepy. No idea why Bella didn’t find it so when Edward said it to her. Remind me to build up a wall between us so that you stop doing that.”

-Him constantly using cheesy pickup lines on you.

- “Your eyes are blue like the ocean. And baby I’m lost at sea.”

- “Dick?”

- “Yes?”

- “My eyes are brown.”

-Him talking shit and yelling at the screen whenever you two play video games.

-Dancing at 3am in the living room to old romantic songs when both of you are in your pjs.

-Him whispering very inappropriate things in your ear at inappropriate times.

-He’s the one who hogs the blanket during the night.

-Whenever he goes out on patrol at night, you stay up all night worrying on the couch even though he insists that you should go to sleep.

-He calls you during patrol at the worst times.

-“Hey babe, what’s up? What are you doing?”

-“Just grabbing a snack. Why are you calling during the patrol?”

-“Oh it’s very quiet. As quiet as a- *something crashes in the background*”

-“Dick?? What the hell was that?”

-“*grunts* Construction, babe.”

-“Want me to prepare the first aid kit?”

-“Yes that would be preferable.” 

~Charlie

rescued/escaped hostage starter sentences

“Calm down, calm down. It’s me! You’re not where you think you are, you’re safe with me at home.”
“You need to snap out of it, it’s a flashback. Nobody is going to hurt you anymore, trust me!”
“Help! I need help! Call the police, please. Help me! Don’t let him/her find me! I escaped, but he/she’s after me!”
“Listen, listen. You are going to be okay. He/she is locked away for good, alright?”
”It’s a very strange idea that someone will spend the rest of their life in prison because of what they did to me.”
”I don’t want her/him to go to prison. She/he did it because she/he loved me.”
“Can you please tell me what happened while you were… gone?”
”I never stopped thinking about you.”
”The police told me it would be best to assume you were dead, because of what might be happening to you otherwise… But I could never convince myself.”
“We kept your bedroom the way it always was… I understand if you’d want it changed, but I want you to know that we never lost hope that you’d come back home.”
“Is that– Is that really you? Oh my god! I can’t believe it’s you!”
“How do you feel after your first night home?”
“The police will need to ask you about what happened… but maybe you want to tell us first? You haven’t said a thing since we got you back!”
“We have imagined the worst things that could have happened to you. Please just tell us so we can try to move on and help you.”
“Shh, it was a nightmare. You’re in your own bedroom.”
“If you want to start living your old life, you’re going to have to start putting what happened to you behind you.”
“I can never be who I used to be! I was gone for years! And you expect me to go through some therapy and have my old life back?! That’s never going to happen!”
”Were you scared all the time? Or… or did you get used to it?”
”I’m not even sure what I’d rather hear, that you were always afraid or that you actually liked it there.”
“Nothing happened. I just ran away. I was sick of being here. I just made it up to sound interesting.”
“Will you please come out of your bedroom… I know you’re probably not comfortable with the amount of space after what you’re used to, but please try…”
“I’m here for you. I’ll keep you safe. I’m not going to lose you a second time.”
“Shh, it’s okay! It’s normal to have flashbacks, but you have to try to focus on me now.”
“You can’t go back there! Are you insane? Why do you want to?!”

2

Many years before that, one of the boys came down with the pox. Maester Luwin said if he made it through the night, he’d live. But it would be a very long night. So I sat with him all through the darkness. Listened to his ragged little breaths. His coughing, his whimpering.

Which boy?

Jon Snow. When my husband brought that baby home from the war, I couldn’t bear to look at him. I didn’t want to see those brown strangers eyes staring up at me. So I prayed to the Gods, take him away. Make him die. He got the pox. And I knew I was the worst woman who ever lived. A murderer. I’d condemned this poor, innocent child to a horrible death all because I was jealous of his mother. A woman he didn’t even know. So I prayed to all seven Gods, let the boy live. Let him live and I’ll love him. I’ll be a mother to him. I’ll beg my husband to give him a true name, to call him Stark and be done with it, to make him one of us. And he lived. And I couldn’t keep my promise. And everything that’s happened since then, all this horror that’s come to my family, it’s all because I couldn’t love a motherless child.

viserys-last-of-his-name  asked:

So...racism in ASOIF. Pretty blatant, no? His clear equation of whiteness with beauty? The manner in which lands of color are always sexually...open. GRRM tries, sometimes, he really does, but there's some unhealthy shit there right? Could you give your thoughts on that, or link to a time when you have? Thank you! (Yes, I know my name is misspelled.)

Blanket statement before I start on this one: you can love a story to pieces and still point out its flaws and blind spots, including the racist kind. If we only consumed non-problematic media, we would consume no media whatsoever, but we still gotta be honest with ourselves about where our faves fall short. ASOIAF is my very favorite thing (shocking, I know), yet aspects of it are disappointing, and this is one of them.

For me, what really crystallized the problem with how GRRM writes the Dothraki and the Ghiscari especially is when I read some insightful people comparing that writing to how the author frames the wildlings. Personally, I think GRRM does some of his very best writing with the Free Folk. Throughout the series, the author lavishes attention on their individuality, their rich and sad history, their multi-faceted ideology and how it plays out in each of their unique life stories, all geared toward making Jon—and us—feel for them. Not just intellectually understand that they are human beings like anyone else, but feel it, in his and our bones.  

I want to really emphasize individuality, because it’s important—putting faces on the monolithic swarm changes Jon’s entire worldview over the course of ACOK, ASOS, and ADWD. That’s not just a band of stinking wildlings howling for blood, not anymore. That’s Ygritte, kissed by fire, who loved and was loved, lost and was lost. That’s Tormund Giantsbane, the only one of Jon’s many dads who doesn’t project anything onto him, but simply enjoys his company and wants him to be happy. That’s Mance and Gilly and Val, people that I care about and feel I have come to know. “This is a whole people come together.” One of the worst among them gets a POV; Varamyr Sixskins is the most stomach-churning face we ever wear, but by his prologue’s end, he’s a thoroughly fleshed-out villain, his life story told. I understand him, and my understanding of the wildlings as a whole is richer for what his story communicates.

This is good storytelling, in other words. Really good. Not flawless, but overall, it’s an engine of empathy and humanization with a big-picture political aim: the wildlings are people too, and that means we have to stand with them against the Long Night.

“When the cold winds rise, we shall live or die together. It is time we made alliance against our common foe.” He looked at Jon. “Would you agree?”

“My father dreamed of resettling the Gift,” Jon admitted. “He and my uncle Benjen used to talk of it.” He never thought of settling it with wildlings, though… but he never rode with wildlings, either. He did not fool himself; the free folk would make for unruly subjects and dangerous neighbors. Yet when he weighed Ygritte’s red hair against the cold blue eyes of the wights, the choice was easy. “I agree.”

It’s stirring stuff, and a model to be studied. Those who were initially barbarians in our POV’s eyes are humanized…

…when they are white. When they are not white, the humanization drops off to a glaring and significant degree. Jon and Dany are paralleled throughout the story, but this is one very telling difference: the cultural Other in Jon’s story gets a human face, while Dany’s (to an overwhelming if not 100% complete degree) stays a swarm. This is true whether said swarm is being presented negatively…

Four of the men seemed to be named Grazdan, presumably after Grazdan the Great who had founded Old Ghis in the dawn of days. They all looked alike; thick fleshy men with amber skin, broad noses, dark eyes.

…or positively.

She trotted, then cantered, then broke into a gallop, her braid streaming behind. The freed slaves parted before her. “Mother,” they called from a hundred throats, a thousand, ten thousand. “Mother,” they sang, their fingers brushing her legs as she flew by. “Mother, Mother, Mother!”

You can definitely see parallels between Dany’s assimilation into the Dothraki in AGOT and Jon’s rumspringa with the wildlings in ASOS; @racefortheironthrone makes that case here. But the difference is that in Dany’s story on the Dothraki Sea and in Slaver’s Bay, there’s so rarely even the pretense of individualization. I challenge anyone to describe to me the characterization of Dany’s bloodriders—give me a paragraph on what makes Aggo and Rakharo different. (You would be able to with Mance v. Tormund.) Tell me about Hizdahr zo Loraq and Reznak mo Reznak as human beings. (You would be able to with Ygritte and Varamyr.) Where is the Tormund of the Dothraki? Where is the Ygritte of the Ghiscari? They are not there…or rather, they are, but GRRM doesn’t bother showing them, and seems more than a little disinterested in the people he does show. He finds “the human heart in conflict with itself” in so many other parts of the story, yet not here.

This is where Jon ends up RE the wildlings:

“I am the shield that guards the realms of men. Those are the words. So tell me, my lord—what are these wildlings, if not men?”

This is where Dany ends up RE the Ghiscari:

It was a city of strange men with strange gods and stranger hair, of slavers wrapped in fringed tokars, where grace was earned through whoring, butchery was art, and dog was a delicacy.

The latter is never countered within the text itself. We are not shown how Dany is wrong. This is a problem. (I say that even while worshipping at the altar of Dany X ADWD and recognizing that moment’s place within her personal arc; vast, contain multitudes, and so on.) But this failure of empathy, imagination, dramatization, and humanization did not occur in isolation. This is a major problem with the genre as a whole, and it’s honestly one of the reasons I’m generally much more of a horror and sci-fi guy than a fantasy guy. Those have their own issues, of course (because, again, everything we create does), but fantasy’s history lends itself to a particularly colonialist-nostalgia-tinged take on things. That is far too big a subject to summarize here, and of course concerns our relationship to all media, not just fantasy stories. So, given that a picture is worth a thousand words…Peter Jackson knew to cut Tom Bombadil, but he didn’t know to cut this:

So when I say that the way GRRM has written this fantasy story speaks to a racial blind spot, I am not making a problem up out of thin air because I want to be mad about something, as is the all-caps accusation every single time anyone brings this up. I am saying that this is yet one more nail, and that while GRRM has addressed many of the genre’s tropes and cliches with style to spare, he has also proved willing to take some disappointing and well-trodden shortcuts.

My grandma lived under the house

by reddit user chewingskin

Before you read these moments from my life, I’d like to apologize for the language, but I’m trying to recall it from the exact detail.

During the months of June, July, and August, I spent many hot summers of my childhood at my Grandmother’s house further west on the island of Cape Breton. The forest was plentiful, the plains were a vibrant green, and my Grandmother’s house was a rickety old two-story that was built sometime in the 50’s and looked like it didn’t belong.

Keep reading

RICK  &  MORTY  SENTENCE  STARTERS.  

  • ❝Right now, we’re gonna go pick up your little friend.❞ 
  • ❝Y'know, I want you to have somebody.❞
  • ❝ I’m taking charge of the situation, buddy!❞
  • ❝If you love her/him so much, why don’t you… marry her/him?!❞ 
  • ❝I’m starting to work up some anxiety about this whole thing!❞ 
  • ❝ Big tough guy all of a sudden.❞ 
  • ❝Alright, alright, calm down. Listen to me.❞ 
  • ❝I know that new situations can be intimidating.❞  
  • ❝I’m no stranger to scary situations, I deal with them all the time.❞  
  • ❝Y'know, we did something great today.❞  
  • ❝I didn’t know hanging out with you was making me smarter!❞ 
  • ❝In reality, you’re as dumb as they come.❞ 
  • ❝I have to give ‘em up just to get your parents off my back!❞  
  • ❝Boy, you’re really gonna flip your lid over this one.❞ 
  • ❝It’s just like that movie you keep crowing about!❞ 
  • ❝You don’t have to try and impress me, _____!❞ 
  • ❝Hey! I said nobody move, buddy!❞ 
  • ❝Just do the same thing here and we’ll be fine!❞ 
  • ❝They were removed. Where have they gone?❞ 
  • ❝You will walk when it is time to walk.❞ 
  • ❝You can run but you can’t hide, bitch!❞ 
  • ❝Well, at least I didn’t really crap my pants.❞ 
  • ❝You’re sleeping in your crap right now.❞ 
  • ❝Are these pills supposed to wake me up or something?❞ 
  • ❝Who are you?! Answer me!❞ 
  • ❝Okay, well, I can’t cure death.❞   
  • ❝Where’s the anger coming from, man?❞ 
  • ❝Fuck those people. Fuck this whole thing, ______. ❞  
  • ❝Well, make yourself comfortable because I suck.❞ 
  • ❝What’re you lookin’ at, motherfucker?!❞
  • ❝Let’s go make ourselves at home, huh?❞ 
  • ❝I’ll do you a favor. I’ll throw in a fart.❞ 
  • ❝Oh, it looks cool, huh? That’s why you want it?❞ 
  • ❝You speak when you’re spoken to, ding-a-ling!❞  
  • ❝This place is the worst! I wanna go home!!❞
  • ❝What are you gonna do, ground me?!❞  
  • ❝I don’t wanna masturbate! I wanna conquer the planet!❞ 
  • ❝What about weapons?! What about domination of the enemy?!❞ 
  • ❝I’d rather breath poison than live another minute with you!❞ 
  • ❝We’re not heroes for having unprotected sex on prom night.❞ 
  • ❝Oh, now they’re resting comfortably in my stomach.❞  
  • ❝I really could go for some enchiladas!❞ 
  • ❝Can I show you something?❞ 
  • ❝I basically destroyed the whole world.❞ 
  • ❝I’m proud of you two for working together.❞  
  • ❝Do I need to call the police?❞ 
  • ❝I don’t care what anyone says.❞  
  • ❝I promise never to make that your problem again.❞ 
  • ❝I got a computer in here, you know?❞ 
  • ❝And also, knock next time, you know?❞
  • ❝Also, every ten seconds, it stabs your balls.❞ 
  • ❝This place is a real who’s who of who’s you and me.❞ 
  • ❝Dude, are you..? Wait, you’re being a dick, right?❞ 
  • ❝So… I should get on my knees and kiss your ass?!❞ 
  • ❝I haven’t quite captured your beautiful eyes.❞  
  • ❝This is probably the best thing that could have happened to me!❞  
  • ❝Eventually, everything either is or isn’t.❞ 
  • ❝Whatever you’re asking, the answer is I’m amazing.❞  
  • ❝I’m glad that was painful! You deserve it!❞ 
  • ❝Your relationship with your father is psychotic!❞ 
  • ❝Pay for it with money. You know, like how every store in the world works?❞ 
  • ❝You’re not the cause of your parents’ misery, you’re just a symptom of it.❞
  • ❝What people call “love” is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed.❞ 

When I would get nightmares, you’d wake up to hold me and to tell me that everything will be just fine.

Yet, the worst nightmare I’ve ever had is the one I’m living in. The one where I wake up everyday to see that you’re gone.

—  excerpt from a book I’ll never write #42 // @loveactivist
the quality of mercy (1/1)

Summary: In which Killian confesses to David and Emma. Spoilers for 6x12.

Rated: T

Warnings: None

Words: ~4.3k

Notes: I had a lot of feelings about the end of 6x12.  Title from The Quality of Mercy by William Shakespeare.  Much love and gratitude to my instrumental wife @ripplestitchskein for reading this through for me.

Also on ff and ao3


The worst of it, Killian thinks, is that for a moment, he doesn’t recall the man’s face.

He was nothing but a liability, standing between his crew and enough riches to carry him from one day to the next, bleeding out a living until he could sink his hook into the crocodile’s neck. And he doesn’t recognize David’s father at first, because he’d been merely one in the stream, one of the nameless voices that whispers to him late at night, or early in the morning, growing louder and louder, until he’s forced out of bed – and out of the endearingly tight circle of Emma’s arms – to wander along the line where the town meets the sea.

Only now, this one has a name, and the longer and harder he peers down at the drawing, the more familiar he seems. Not only from a hazy memory, but from the set of his brow, the swell of his cheeks, features he sees in the man he now calls his friend, and in the woman he longs to call his wife. And here, in the midnight shadows of the home he shares with her, he holds tight to the incriminating pages, a wisp of the darkness still stirring in his heart suggesting he surrender them to the sea.

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“I had rehearsed losing him not just to ward off suffering by taking it in small doses beforehand, but, as all superstitious people do, to see if my willingness to accept the very worst might not induce fate to soften its blow.  Like soldiers trained to fight by night, I lived in the dark so as not to be blinded when darkness came.”

It’s my job (Sweet Pea x Reader)

Can you write a sweet pea imagine where he comes to the reader after the fight against Archie and the reader is angers but cleans him up and it’s fluff and she’s like I’m just scared your not going to come back and shes a northsider pls xx

and

Can you do a sweet pea imagine where she like bandages him up after the fight with Archie

Requested?: Yes. Words:1206. warnings: mentions of violence, swearing? 

A/N: It starts off really cringe like. also sorry if there are misspelled words or bad grammar I didn’t proof reader . Feedback would be great. Don’t forget to like/reblog and send in request 


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anonymous asked:

Hey, do you have any advice for how to choose and coexist with a roommate in college? I feel like rooming with a complete stranger will be awkward and weird

Some General Roommate Tips

1. Responsibility. It’s super important for both you and your friend to share responsibility in terms of your apartment-related bills. Both of your names should go on the lease, this way you are equally responsible for the apartment’s rental payments and general well being. You may not be able to put two names on your electric or internet/cable company accounts, so one of you should make an account for electric and the other for cable. Split everything equally and do not allow your friendship to interfere with this.

2. Fighting. It doesn’t matter if you’re sleeping together or complete strangers- you will fight. The most important part of any fight is both parties coming to a compromise and admitting wrong doing. Under no circumstance should you allow fights to last longer than a day, a few hours if possible. Allow yourself and your friend to cool off, and then come together to reconcile. Also try not to fight after ten o’clock at night, a tired fight is the worst type of fight you can possibly have- you will say things that you don’t mean and they will hurt. If you’re starting to fight late at night, go to bed ASAP.

3. Personal space. Personal space is key to having a successful roommate living situation! Make sure that both of you have a door that you can close and a room that is strictly your own, a space that you alone can customize and work with. In turn, respect your roommate’s space and do not under any circumstance go into their room and touch their things.

4. Friendship. In my experience, friends who become roommates tend to get along better than strangers who become roommates. While not every situation can be like Ted and Marshall from HIMYM, you are choosing to move in with somebody that you jive with. This doesn’t mean that the pair of you need to hang out 24/7 or always have something planned. This just means that hopefully the fights and issues that arise will be easier to solve.

These Are Not Your Responsibility

1. Walking your roommate’s dog.

2. Driving your roommate to their job.

3. Cleaning up after your roommate’s friends.

4. Telling your roommate’s girlfriend that he’s cheating on her.

5. Lying for your roommate.

6. Spotting your roommate for rent or grocery money.

7. Waiting around for your roommate’s package (unless you’re home already).

8. Housing your roommate’s friend or SO on your couch for three weeks (if they’re not paying rent they shouldn’t be living in your home).

9. Your roommate’s academic record.

10. Your roommate’s mental state.

Things That Are Your Responsibility

1. Communicating with your roommate.

2. Paying your half of the expenses.

3. Washing your dishes instead of cluttering up the sink.

4. Cleaning your hair out of the sink drain.

5. Taking care of your mental state.

6. Respecting your roommate’s privacy unless there’s an absolute emergency.

7. Giving your roommate any mail or phone messages in a timely manner.

8. Treating any pets your roommate may have with kindness and respect (no matter how deplorable the animal may be).

9. Consulting with your roommate about any major renovation or financial changes in the apartment.

10. Asking your roommate if it’s okay for your drunk friend to crash on the couch.

Hope this helps! XX

“You’re mister J’s new obsession, Sugar” 2/3 - Bruce Wayne x Reader

Summary : The Joker kidnapped you over a week ago, and your family is starting to really panic. Chapter 2/3. 

Warnings : Violence, because we’re talking about the Joker here…Hope you’ll enjoy it as much as the first part ! Don’t hesitate to tell me what you think :).

PART 1 PART 3

(My masterlist blog here : https://ella-ravenwood-archives.tumblr.com)

______________________________________________________________________

A few hours after your capture, you finally met him. For real. And it was the most terrifying thing you ever lived. 

A wall opened up on the side of the bedroom, and Harley Quinn entered first. Her face was swollen, all sort of shades of blues and purple. Some green around the chin. Black around the eyes.  And behind her followed the clown. 

He pushed the ex-shrink out of his way brutally, and she tripped and fall with a loud thud. He didn’t pay attention to her at all, circling around you like a shark. 

You held your breath in, he was getting closer. 

Harley was still on the floor, not moving, and though she was crazy and tried to kill your husband multiple times, you couldn’t help but feel pity for her. You knew she genuinely had a mental disorder, she wasn’t a complete psycho, a wild dog with rabies like the Joker. You knew she was helplessly in love with the clown, and in return, he was nothing but abusive…You just felt so sorry for her. 

But only for a few seconds, because now, the Joker was so close to you that you could feel his breath on your face…

-Hello there. 

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#sanversweek day 3: “you’re drunk”

“Hey, Khara!”

Kara looks down at her phone for a second, suspicious. The phone says it’s Maggie calling, but Kara’s never heard Maggie’s voice sound like this before.

“Maggie?”

“Kkhhara! Hey! The sister of my – my Alex’s sister! The sister of my Alex!”

Kara lets out a deep breath. “Hoo boy.” Maggie’s drunk. Maggie’s shitfaced. Maggie’s shitfaced and Alex is out of town and Maggie called Kara.

And Maggie and Alex have been together for a while now, and things have been a lot better between Maggie and Kara since Alex was kidnapped, but they don’t exactly hang out without Alex. They can chill in the living room together while Alex runs around the corner to pick up dinner or whatever, but that’s pretty much it.

But Maggie’s shitfaced and Alex is out of town and out of all the people in city Maggie could have called, she called Kara.

So Kara gets Winn to track Maggie’s phone, because Maggie keeps accidentally hanging up on her out of excitement to be on the phone with “the sister of my Alex,” and so she finds herself standing outside a sports bar in a part of town she rarely goes to.

And she elbows her way inside and has to use her x-ray vision to find Maggie because she’s smashed up against the bar, surrounded by tall men yelling at TV screens.

“Kkhara!!” Maggie’s face practically splits into pieces from the force of her grin, dimples threatening to tunnel down into her gums, and Kara understands the power this woman has over her sister. That smile, honestly. “How’d you know I was here!?” Maggie is just thrilled with this turn of events, and she’s completely off her face but so happy that Kara can’t help but grin.

“I came to take you home, slugger. You’re a little drunk.” Kara reaches out a hand, but Maggie instead propels her entire body into motion, throwing an arm around Kara’s shoulders and pulling her into the bar. The force of it would have knocked most humans down, and Kara spares a moment to be grateful that her sister is so physically strong.

“No! Khhhara! You gotta stay, we gotta watch, I’m magic, I’m helping!” Maggie gestures with her other hand to the TVs which seem to be showing a hockey game.

“You’re watching the hockey game?” Kara’s confused – Maggie’s never mentioned hockey before.

“Yeah! But you gotta take a shot every time they fight, okay, super Kara?”

Kara pinches the bridge of her nose. “Hoo boy,” she says again. That’s a lot of shots.

“How about you take shots of water for the next few?” She offers.

Maggie blinks at her a few times, face serious, before she cracks another huge grin. “THE SISTER OF MY ALEX IS A BABY GENIUS,” she crows, waving her arms dramatically to make sure the whole bar knows.

She gets literally everyone in the entire bar to take a shot of water for the next fight, which Kara’s sure the bartenders are thrilled about, and she clinks with all the people around her, and makes them all cheers “to hydration.”

She’s fucking hilarious. Kara’s filled her phone with photos and videos, and she sneaks Maggie’s (inputting her sister’s birthday as Maggie’s lock code, because this woman is so fucking smitten it’s ridiculous) to take more footage.

By the end of the game, Maggie has transferred herself entirely onto Kara’s back, holding on like a koala. And she’s so happy, and she won’t stop yelling into Kara’s ear about how much she loves Alex, and how much Alex would love shots of water because Alex is a doctor and doctors love hydrating, and how much of her body is water, and how much she loves Alex, and how being smart must be genetic in the Danvers family, and how she knows they aren’t genetic-ed together because of the big ole secret she can’t say (Kara shoves another shot of water in her mouth there), and how much she loves Alex.

And Maggie makes Kara walk her all around the bar like a victory lap and she shakes hands with every single person in there, and calls them all “my dude” and she tells them all “I know you love me but I’m a lesbian for my Alex and this horse is her sister” and Kara is so glad to see that not one of them seems to even blink at that information.

Kara doesn’t get her out of the bar until about twenty minutes after the victory lap ends because Maggie remembered she had pictures of Alex on her phone and wanted to show them to everyone because “my Alex is the most beautiful doctor of aliens in the multiverse, my dudes.”

But finally they’re outside on the sidewalk, Maggie still piggybacked on Kara.

Kara considers her options, and figures it can’t hurt.

She trots to a nearby alley and transfers Maggie from her back to her front, tucking her firmly underneath one arm.

“What are you doing, my horse of Alex? Where are you – OH MY GO—WHOOOOOOAAAAAA!” They lift off, Kara going slowly at first in case Maggie is going to freak out or get squirmy.

But Maggie’s eyes just get super wide and she whoops and she is clearly so fucking delighted. Kara flies her home the long way, detouring over the ocean and doing a couple loops because she’s never seen Maggie so happy, so light, so childish, so thrilled.

When Kara touches them down inside Maggie’s living room, Maggie looks up at her, eyes glassy with happiness. “Can we do that again with my Alex?”


Maggie wakes up to one of the worst headaches she’s ever had.

She groans, and it takes her nearly ten minutes to screw up the courage to open her eyes.

She rolls over – so slowly – and grabs her phone off her nightstand. She can’t believe she remembered to plug it in. She must have been off her fucking face last night – she can barely remember a thing.

Her face screws up in confusion – she has like a million texts in the group message with Kara, Winn, James, and Alex. She scrolls through them, realizing that they’re photos and videos from Kara documenting her whole night.

This is monumentally embarrassing.

Alex clearly woke up earlier, and has already flooded Maggie with loving texts, admiring her shots technique and confirming her medical approval of “water shots.” Alex says that she loves her and that she’ll be home tonight and she’s ordered a pizza to be delivered at 12:30pm to get Maggie through her hangover.

She’s the perfect woman.

Maggie has one more text, this one from Kara.

i had the BEST time last night, my dude. can’t wait for the next hockey game. xox -the sister/horse of your alex.

james and lily are such a beautiful ship. 

we have james, who is confident about himself. he’s loyal to his friends. he broke the law so his friend would not have to be alone during his worst nights every month. he’s really smart; one of the creators of a live map of the castle, that also mentions names of everyone in the school like? wow. but he was also a bully. caused people public humiliation. but he learned and became a better person. he changed because he acknowledged his flaws and understood for himself why what he did was wrong. he was also that dorky guy that doodled his crushes’ name on tests. 

and we have lily. who takes no shit and knows she deserves the best of the best. she’s smart - highly spoken about by professors, yet also gets in trouble. she’s the best friend anyone can have. she stands up for what she believes in. pushed away a toxic person from her life. also, she was able to look past at what a person (james) used to be, and respect the person as who they are now - bc tbh, it’s not easy to change your opinion on someone especially if they used to be a bully.  

they’re both strong and independent people. together, they’re unstoppable :”))