this is the shizz man

anonymous asked:

Give me reasons to live

-butts
-cats
-dogs
-mainly cute animals
-some cool dang fantasy like places 
-great movies
-great books
-amazing/catchy music
-anime
-tv shows
-nice and warm baths in the winter
-pools in the summer
-ice cream
-coffee with vanilla icecream 
-boba tea
-cakes 
-mainly sweets
-some good food/favorite foods
-people that actually care about you and love you for you 
-holidays
-nice people in this world that help others out by being amazing
-cute old people that tell you some wise stuff
-babies that are actually calm and fall asleep on you and just not cry after being woken up
-baby animals
-memes
-the internet
-cartoons
-comfortable clothes
-sleep
-nice warm drinks in the winter
-GAMES
-big blankets that are extra soft
-peace and quiet
-childhood nostalgia 
-birthdays
-being loved
-accepting yourself and actually being so comfortable with yourself that you don’t care what others say about you
-memes-
-watching rain on a peaceful day while drinking your favorite hot beverage and eating some snacks
-good jokes
-horrible jokes that still make you laugh like crazy
-vacations 
-NEW GAMES
-cosplay
-cuddling
-farting jokingly 
-annoying siblings
-caring for someone and seeing them appreciate that 
-making someones day/making them smile on accident/on purpose
-giving gifts
-earning your own money and buying stuff for yourself and others
-100 plushes in your room that you can jump into and swim around in
-THE SPACE
-graduating and flipping your teachers off 
-the win dance
-jokes about harry potter- honestly have you seen the jokes about wizards shitting their pants and just making them disappear because they apparently dont have toilets- poopikus disapearikus- 
-the old memes
-hardworking bees (aahhh the hardworking lil fellas that keep me going)
-mythical creatures
-mythical stories
-nature
-weird natural phenomenons 
-THE SHY LIL OCTOPUS 
-my brother saying octopussy instead of octopus 
-also goes for platypus which he calls platypussy 

-scientists discovering new animals deep in the ocean and loosing their shiz- 
-watching someone fight for their life against a disease and them actually winning the battle and getting better
-BIG DOGGIES 
-lanterns
-playing horror games with friends and shizzing your pants- 
-slides
-WATER SLIDES
-good soups,man
-birbs
-accidentally predicting the future
-seeing some peoples weird talents
-booping small shark noses
-lady bug flying on your shoulder and declaring you as the chosen one
-luck charms
-water guns
-DEEZ N UT S
-shia lebeouf 
-the WWE watch out watch out meme
-old vines
-seeing your favorite person after a long time
-unexpected gifts
-soft skin yo- 
-contact lenses to fool people into thinking that you have been taken over by a demon
-undertale
-inspiring people
-working hard and actually being proud of yourself
-vintage stuff
-feeling dead after a full nighter but it was still worth it- 
-slapping a lil shi-
-people actually caring for nature
-thinking about pluto because the sweet lil planet has a heart on it and i love it
-pluto also loves you
-puns 
-awful soap operas
-favorite fruits 
-trying something new and actually loving it
-taking care of yourself
-feeling good in the breeze
-road trip song or games
-mustaches 
-future technology 
-imagine hugging a robot
-the feeling of being healthy
-acing your tests and exams
-compliments
-encouragement
-beating depression in the face with a crowbar
-break anxietys knees with a crowbar 
-CROWS THAT LOVE YOU AND PROTECT YOU FROM BAD PEOPLE
-giant teddy bears
-sand castles
-making sculptures
-drawing
-watching the whole show in a day
-mahoshojo yo
-a black woman has created something that cures cancer with lasers
-everyone that cares about every kind of life and cherishes them no matter where you are from or what your appearance is
-parades
-carnivals
-cotton candy 
-10 bathbombs 
-naps
-tickling babies
-playing in snow and not actually getting sick after that
-canceled plans that you didnt want to go to
-making a strangers baby smile/laugh by making a silly face
-enjoyable talks 
-being allowed to not hug or shake hands with anyone who you dont want to shake/hug with.
-achieving your dreams by working hard for them
-the feeling of getting 2 bucks in childhood and you thought you got rich or something.
-seeing your family happy and not argue with each other for a long long time
-secret santas
-THE PIES 
-the friends who will miss you if you ever disappeared
-comfortable sleeping positions
-great dreams
-lucid dreams

Drafts on the floor.

Yo yo yo yo yo I just figured it out. I CRACKED THE CODE. Hear me out, okay? Okay so like Eve came from Adam’s rib, right? A man. We all know Eve did some shizz up in that garden - like her and that snake had a good ol’ conversation and everything. So, like what if Adam punched her? In the vagina? And she just bled everywhere and that’s why girl’s get periods? IT MAKES SENSE. It’s called menstruation, Eve came from a man. A dude menstruates her bleeding ‘cause he caused it. Dude

Outside of cartoons, no one ever uses weird rubber masks to try to fool law enforcement – until last month, that is. A man indicted on drug trafficking charges, Shizz Miller (who was presumably arrested for drug trafficking after police simply rounded up everyone named “Shizz”), was cornered by police at his residence. Since building a jetpack and flying away would have been too expensive, Shizz did the next-best thing: He slapped on an old man mask and strolled past the cops, barely stopping short of offering them hard candy and complaining about ethnic teenagers.

Of course, since the accused looked less like a human being and more like if Future Biff’s life hit the skids, the police soon caught on and promptly arrested him. The cops did praise the “Hollywood quality” of the mask, though – presumably because the only movie these officers ever saw was Clint Eastwood’s J. Edgar.

Yup, it seems that in order for a rubber mask to truly fool someone for more than a minute, they really need to be a bunch of teenagers who’ve stumbled out of a hot-boxed van while talking to their Great Dane like it’s stringing together sentences.

6 Insane Movie Schemes (People Actually Tried In Real Life)

go-fuck-a-dead-protagonist  asked:

OMFG PLZ DO MORE POKETALE *smol espeon screeching* //mun here, sorry for Alto's outburst, but i'd have to agree with him. Poketale is amazing. u go person. alsoo i think i made Alto so well that i'm actually kin with my muse/OC... well.//

I totally plan on more poketale, trust me. This is a thing. In fact, *rubs hands* I’ve talked to…. a couple of peeps that created pokemon/undertale aus, and we plan to do some crossover shizz.

@friisans owns the trainertale au (which I consider to be the parent of my au, given they’re the one that inspired me to make mine), and since i have their permission, I will be doodling some crossover shizz because ahhhh yiss man, all the au. PS go follow them, they’re really nice and their art is perfect.

@miacott owns another poketale au (which I consider like a sister au of mine - multiverse theory or some shizz!), and I also plan on doing stuff with them. Yesssss. Go visit them too! They’re also really sweet <3