this is the name of the show i'm not lying

  • Me: *watching a new show/movie/ playing new game*
  • Brain: I bet people ship them
  • Me: Nah...
  • Me: ...
  • Me: *searches the ship up on google to find loads of fanart of the two*
  • Brain: You ship it right??
  • Me: I don't ship it, I'm just looking
  • Me: I don't ship it, I'm just looking
  • Me: ...
  • Me: ...
  • Brain: Oh stop lying to your self, you ship it.
  • Me: ...
  • Me: *searches up ship name and follows loads of blogs on tumblr of the ship*
The Lego Movie - Sentence Starters
  • "Cover your butt."
  • "Oh, now there's a prophecy."
  • "All this is true, because it rhymes."
  • "That was a great, inspiring legend...that you made up."
  • "Good morning, apartment!"
  • "Ah here it is, the instructions to fit in, have everyone like you, and always be happy!"
  • "Wear clothes. Whoops, almost forgot that one!"
  • "Honey, where are my pants?"
  • "What was I just thinking? Ah, I don't care."
  • "Take everything weird and blow it up!"
  • "Who wants to eat some delicious chicken wings and get craaazyyyy?!"
  • "...I think I heard a whoosh."
  • "I feel like maybe I should touch that."
  • "So you've never heard of the prophecy?"
  • "I watch a lot of cop shows on TV, isn't there also supposed to be a good cop?!"
  • "That guy's not a criminal mastermind."
  • "We all have something that makes us something, and ____ is...nothing."
  • "Am I gonna die?!"
  • "Yes, we've told him he'll live so he doesn't try to escape, but...we're lying to him."
  • "Come with me if you wanna not die."
  • "What are you, a DJ?"
  • "Darn darn darn, darny, darn!"
  • "Oh my g-o-s-h!"
  • "I'm not sure exactly why you'd bring that up."
  • "I never have any ideas."
  • "Blah blah blah, proper name, place name, backstory stuff."
  • "I think I got it. But just in case... Tell me the whole thing again, I wasn't listening."
  • "How scary can someone's office be?"
  • "This meeting could run a little bit...deadly."
  • "It makes me just want to pick up whoever's standing closest to me and just throw them through this window!"
  • "All I'm asking for is total perfection!"
  • "Howdy guys! Come sit on me!"
  • "I don't think he's ever had an original thought in his life."
  • "Introducing, the double decker couch! So everyone can watch TV together and be buddies!"
  • "That idea is just the worst."
  • "Your mind is so prodigiously empty that there is nothing in it to clear away in the first place."
  • "I'm dark and brooding too! ...Guys, look! A rainbow!"
  • "Any idea is a good idea! Except the not happy ones."
  • "I know what you're thinking: he is the least qualified person in the world to lead us! And you are right!"
  • "You are so disappointing on so many levels."
  • "This is not how Batman dies!"
  • "Somebody get me some markers! Some construction paper! And some glitter glue!"
  • "I'm here to see...your butt."
  • "You're telling me that you have a machine to control the universe and you can't listen to tunes in surround sound?"
  • "I want speakers that you can hug with your arms and your legs."
  • "I didn't draw that, is that me exploding?!"
  • "Must be weird. One minute, you're the most special person in the universe. The next, you're nobody!"
  • "Unfortunately, I'm going to have to leave you here to die."
  • "So I guess running around and screaming is normal."
  • "You don't know me, but I'm on TV, so you can trust me."
  • "SPACESHIP!"
  • "What in the world is that? It's adorable."
  • "Do not eat me!"
  • "Why is the dragon on top of the luxury condo development?"
  • "You don't have to be the bad guy."
  • "He's the hero you deserve."
  • "Everything is awesome!"

In an episode full of outrageous things the most outrageous was John Watson encouraging Sherlock to chase after Irene Adler. Like I get all the stuff he was saying about Sherlock needing a romantic entanglement but Molly is literally twenty minutes from doing her shift to help Sherlock’s recovery and then they all go out for birthday cake. But IRENE is the woman Sherlock should be chasing? Seriously? 

elvi-locus-deactivated20170527  asked:

okay but now you're literally making false accusations about me. Sure, I can be on the list because I'm not an anti whatever but I did not send that ask, also how does that classify as harassment? You literally have no proof I sent that ask, I don't think you have the right to make such a claim. I feel extremely mistreated so please remove that.

hi there, glad to see you again. here’s my thought process on adding that flag to your name:

first, you sent an ask, off anon, accusing me of lying about you. I responded to you privately. no one else could see this ask unless you directly showed them.

then, I received an anonymous ask directly referencing the first ask that you sent me off anon (which no one could see publicly unless you showed it to someone), using the same type of language, and again accusing me of lying.

there are two possibilities that I can see:
1: you sent to second ask
2: you showed the ask to someone, which prompted them to basically regurgitate the same words from your first ask, using the same speech styles. whether you sent them to do this or not, I don’t know.

if you can punch holes in my logic, then by all means go ahead. i’m fine with removing that flag from your name, but it’s staying unless you can prove that someone else was harassing me. thanks!

-mod pidge

Forbidden Documentary Footage Uncovered
  • Recording is blank for approximately 30 seconds before title screen appears. Title is written in plain white Helvetica font on plain black background. Documentary is titled "Evidence of Flat Earth". Song "Fly" by band Sugar Ray plays for approximately 12 seconds. Song is edited to be slower. Title fades. Host appears standing in field of snow. Host is holding a microphone that appears to be fake. Several times throughout the recording host makes no attempt to actually speak into microphone. Host is either reluctant to make the microphone appear as real or simply does not care.
  • Host: Hello, this is Maria Rosaline and this is my documentary. It is about fla- flat.
  • Host appears to look at something off-screen. Recording quickly cuts to another take.
  • Host: Many people believe in things that don't make sense like ghosts and aliens even though those things are fake. Some people say you can't prove those things are fake, so there is so- some justification in their beliefs. However, everyone knows that the earth is round, so how can you believe it is flat? Some people believe it is flat anyway and they're stupid. This is my thesis.
  • Host looks at something off-screen. Footage cuts to another take.
  • Host: Today we will be talking to someone who thinks the earth is flat, and maybe we will find out why she thinks the earth is flat. Many people believe in different things even though they're fake. Th- this is my thesis.
  • Recording cuts to a seemingly unrelated shot of a graveyard. Possibly recorded in the summer or early autumn. Recording cuts to an elderly woman in a kitchen. Host is off camera but their arm is visible holding the microphone in front of the elderly woman's face. Microphone is noticeably touching the elderly woman's mouth. Elderly woman is unresponsive. Song "How To Save A Life" by band The Fray is plays loudly. Elderly woman seems to speak, but is inaudible over "How To Save A Life" by band The Fray.
  • Host: Turn that shit off.
  • Another voice is heard, presumably whoever is manning the camera.
  • Cameraman: I'm not playing it.
  • Host: St- stop messing around and turn it off.
  • Cameraman: You see me standing right here. How the fuck am I playing it?
  • Recording cuts to footage outside. Elderly woman is only person present in footage. There is heavy snowfall. Deciduous forest is visible in distance. "How To Save A Life" by band The Fray is able to be heard faintly.
  • Elderly Woman: It is very cold.
  • Host: I know, I'm sorry. It's too loud in the house. Let's make this quick and we can all go home. So, why do you be- believe the earth is flat?
  • Elderly Woman: I do not believe in things. It is very cold. We should stay in the house. I do not like it outside.
  • Host: Can you just answer one question, please?
  • Cameraman: Bitch is crazy.
  • Host: Shut the fuck up.
  • Elderly Woman: I do not like it when it is cold outside and dark at night. We should go back inside.
  • Several figures can be seen walking out of the forest in the distance.
  • Cameraman: Okay, I think we should go the fuck back in.
  • Elderly Woman: Yes. Let us. I can make you children brackenberry porridge.
  • Host: Please, please just answer one question and this can all be over with.
  • Figures from the forest begin to walk towards the subjects. Cameraman moves the camera. Camera films the ground.
  • Cameraman: I'm going the fuck in. I'll fail the fucking class. I don't care. I didn't pay tuition for this shit.
  • Host: Come on, this is du- due tomorrow.
  • Elderly Woman: Brackenberry porridge is savory and rich in fiber.
  • Recording cuts to dark footage of a window. "How To Save A Life" by band The Fray plays at excessive volume. Large figures can be seen moving past the window several times. Figures are humanoid in shape. No other significant features can be made out. Recording cuts to silent footage of a mirror. Camera is recording in night vision. Camera can be seen in mirror, but there is no cameraman. Camera is seemingly floating. Recording cuts to footage of snow covered ground. Camera is recording in night vision. Host and Cameraman seem to be walking through forest.
  • Host: It's fucking cold. We're lost. We're gonna die.
  • Cameraman: I found that old hag in her basement, right.
  • Host: We're not gonna find the car. We're gonna fu- fucking freeze out here.
  • Cameraman: She's got this impressive set-up. She was editing our documentary for us.
  • Host: We're gonna die.
  • Cameraman: She said something to me. I couldn't hear her because that shitty song was so loud.
  • Host: We're gonna die.
  • Cameraman: But there was a hammer there, and I thought, "No one would miss this old hag." So I just whacked her over the head. Bam, bam, bam! Three times!
  • Host: We're gonna die.
  • Cameraman: Bam, bam, bam! Another three times.
  • Host: We're go- gonna die.
  • Cameraman: I'm a murderer now.
  • Host: We're gonna die.
  • Cameraman: I'm just kidding I made that up.
  • Host: We're...
  • Recording cuts to silent footage of fake microphone lying in snow. Footage is in night vision. Camera centers on microphone for approximately 5 minutes. Camera goes out of focus several times. Footage ends here.
  • There is evidence to show that "Marina Rosaline" is not the real name of the host that appears in this recording. Video was uploaded by KrauserGamer98 on Roblox Forums. KrauserGamer98 claims to have cut out 48 minutes of "unnecessary" footage. KrauserGamer98 claims most cut footage was blank or focused on a poster featuring the character Crazy Frog.
  • Thank you for reading.
  • little sister: you're lying. you don't know who wrote the journals in gravity falls
  • me: Stanford did. Not the Grunkle Stan we see in the show, his name is Stanley. Stanford and Stanley are twins, for which there is substantial hints in the show along with their fractured relationship. For instance, when we visit Stan's - I'm going to call him Stan to not confuse you for now - mind, we see two swings together, one of which is shattered. Something that may be pointless on first glance, but is significant and carries a point because this is an animated show and they chose to draw that panel to create an emphasis. You also may notice a child with young Stan's same hair sitting in the back of the wrestling match in Stan's memories, with his face buried in a book. Rather befitting considering what Stanford would go on to do, but I digress. In Sock Opera, Bill Cipher remarks that 'who would risk everything for their dumb sibling' while being convinced Mabel would act in her own interest, and in Dreamscaperers, even after Gideon specifically refers to Stan as Stanford, Bill calls him Stan. In the body swap episode, you find a secret room containing Stanford's glasses, which are taken and hidden by Stan, also seen in the Time Traveler's Pig when a young Stanford opens the door. You see a difference in the chins there, as well as their glasses. Stan Pines - Stanley Pines - is posing as his twin brother, the whereabouts of whom are unknown. The Mystery Shack has a secret room that Stan has clearly taken over and does not belong to him, evidenced by the fact he needs the journals to work the machine and the fact that there is a six-fingered glove - indicative of the author's presence as seen on the covers of the journal - which does not fit Stan's hand. The deed to the shack is in Stanford Pines' name, yet the car Stan drives is called the Stanleymobile seen on the license plate in a shorter version. Stan Pines - Stanley Pines - is a con man. You know this already. The beat up car is his. The shack is his brother's, who wrote the journals, who conducted experiments in Gravity Falls, and whose name is Stanford. Alex Hirsch is asked why Mabel and Dipper's parents would be willing to send their children to Stan, a con man. Hirsch replies that the parents do not know Stan 'as well as they think', which is quite obvious if they think Stanley Pines is his brother, Stanford. The large question that I have is if the powers of the carpet found in the body-switching episode will come into play later, as it is found in the same room as Stanford's glasses, or if the carpet was simply a gimmick for the episode and will not be mentioned again. In summary, Stanley Pines took over his brother's house, turned it into a shack for tourists, and poses as his brother while using the lab hidden beneath the house to continue on Stanford Pines' research for Stanley's own use.
  • her: holy shit

Whenever I see people say that the Patrick Kane case was “mishandled”, I want to ask which part they mean exactly. Was it the Blackhawks choosing not to suspend him even though in other cases they do it if there is a charge and would set a dangerous precedent otherwise? Was it the multiple DNA samples from other men, none of which were Patrick Kane? Was it the accusers’ mother’s stunt in creating a fake rape kit and falsely claiming that the evidence was compromised, only of course, after it was shown that there had not been sexual contact? Was it the multiple press conferences first started by her lawyer? Was it the stunt I mentioned earlier that prompted her own lawyer to quit because he thought her family was sketchy? Was it the last tweet of his accuser being about ‘getting money like a ring never won’ before closing her social media accounts and moving to new ones? Was it her father threatening people over social media by making himself with a butcher’s knife his profile picture; or perhaps it was him openly talking about the case with Patrick Kane fans on twitter, (he called my friend a liar when she posted evidence that family had commit real estate fraud)? Was it the media there and around twitter that couldn’t do the simple research that it would take to see that a rape kit in New York state comes in a box and not a bag? Maybe you mean the very strong language by the DA in his closing statements, even referring to it as a “case”. Maybe you’re talking about the DA who took us step by step in a press conference to show that evidence in this case had never been compromised, or maybe you mean the interview he did after the fact detailing why he chose to drop the case; even considering charging her for false reporting but decided not to because he didn’t want to discourage “real” victims coming forward? You are lying to yourself when you say this case only turned into a circus because of the NHL or because of his name, she and her team were a large part.

8157) My mom is suddenly extremely paranoid that I'm gay. She says I "seem gay" and frequently ask if I've found a girlfriend yet, to which I keep saying no. The other day she cornered me and asked, "(name), are you gay? Please be honest." and I said, "No, mom, I'm straight." She said, "Are you sure?" and I looked her in the eyes and said "Yes." She accepted this and moved on. As a guy I am gay. The only reason I didn't show any signs of lying (I'm a bad liar) is because I don't see myself as a guy.