this is the most ridiculous thing ever

I just discovered there is a small subreddit dedicated to google-translating (and actually dubbing, very professionally!!) the Star Wars movies and occasional SWR episodes from english into chinese and back into english again, making the subtitles change ridiculously, and it’s positively the most hilarious thing I’ve ever come across since I saw the LotR post about a similar thing, here are some highlights:

maybe the most ridiculous thing harry ever did was leave figuring out the second task until it was literally the early hours of the morning before it took place and he was still in the library?? like the first task was literally to fight a dragon, if that doesn’t scare you out of procrastinating til the last minute i rly don’t know what will??? i have never related to him more

A quick observation about Shiro and the Black Lion’s bonding moment in the S2 finale: right before Shiro retrieves his bayard from Zarkon, there’s a montage of images showing us how closely he and Black have bonded. It’s all memories of their time together, and most of it’s pretty standard stuff that you’d expect, depicting their close relationship over two seasons.

There’s Black rescuing Shiro from robeasts and dino-dogs:

Black rescuing Shiro on the astral plane when they fought Zarkon together:

Flying together - pretty sure this is from the nosedive exercise, the first time they really bonded:

But… one of the memories is… a bit different:

You guys. You guys. The Black Lion remembered the time they made a Voltron cheer-pyramid and Shiro said “and I’ll form the head”. This is one of their important bonding moments. THIS NONSENSE RIGHT HERE is something the Black Lion (and possibly also Shiro) fondly looks back on as a time they bonded.

Like… how funny must this have seemed from the Black Lion’s point of view? Imagine Black standing on top of the cheerleader pyramid laughing uncontrollably to herself in whatever language giant robot lions speak.

Shiro: “Is everyone bonding and focusing?”

Black Lion: “I love you but this is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever done.”

things from deh 11/19
  • the lights hadnt even gone up on ben yet on the bed and people were already applauding like it was the end of the world. the applause just..kept going. and ben had this choked up look on his face and he was trying not to cry
  • the same for rachel bay jones just. raucous applause. 
  • and also? when the murphy family breakfast rolls on people lost it and they had to wait like 85 minutes before going back into the song
  • ben forgetting his lines in the middle of sincerely, me and just kind of standing there with a little grin on his face as will was just staring at him like omg
  • during ywbf ben walked toward the front of the stage as usual, you know, but he was looking UP at the screens and all around like he’d never seen it before in his life and he wanted to memorize it all. he had his head entirely craned back just looking UP 
  • after smthng jared says about the Gay Emails ben sat there and did his normal little head shake but ppl laughed so much, and he did it again and people laughed, and he just kept doing it an incredible amount of time just. shaking his head and everyone loved it
  • he wiped his hand ENTIRELY down to his foot when he meets zoe for the first time. like not just a dramatic little shirt wipe. he lifted up his leg and wiped it the ENTIRE length to his off-brand shoes
  • after zoe was like “im not breaking up w you” ben was facing out toward the audience and did this little hand moment like Oh but again. we all laughed. and he kept doing it for like 5 hours
  • also his FREAK OUT when he thinks zoe is breaking up w him was SO DRAMATIC he did lunges and shit i have never seen a human body move in that way before
  • mike really pummeled him in sincerely, me during their little Buddy Buddy part. and BEN !!!!!!!!!!!! FUCKIN RAN HIS HAND THROUGH MIKES HAIR INSTEAD OF DOING HIS NORMAL TINY POKES
  • sincerely, me was basically a rock concert ppl next to be started to clap along it was wild
  • bens hug with jlt after for forever didnt end they just did not let go of each other
  • mike was especially kind today as the computer lab connor he was very very kind. gentle. until you know, hes not
  • ben hugged michael park after to break in a glove
  • this is not specific to today but whenever rbj struts up the center of the stage during good for you i lose my mind
  • there was a half standing ovation after words fail. a good portion of the mezzanine stood and i couldnt see the orchestra. man, you could see him concentrating all his energy just NAILING every single not and i think he was legitimately sobbing when he told the murphys the truth. he had to take some breaths. i mean, sobbing more than usual. i was worried for a second
  • so big, so small was impossible to watch bc it was the most truthful beautiful quiet thing ive ever seen. the looks they gave to each other. the words they said without speaking abt how much they love each other. i cannot express the power of the beat that evan and heidi spent looking into each others eyes doing nothing but being together. they took their time on this song and it hurt so bad 
  • the finale was ridiculous it was just everyone weeping weeping weeping. laura dreyfuss was WEEPING her face was red with tears but she somehow held it together to talk to ben and say “i wanted you to see this” but even from the MEZZANINE i could see the sparkle of tears in her eyes and i was like laura please if you start crying, im really gonna lose my composure and fuckin shriek or something
  • when everyone came out to sing for forever at the finale and theyre all looking at him ben just looked at them for a good long minute and theyre all smiling at him, and the look on rachel bay jones’ face is ethereal, and hes in the spotlight, and he steps forward to sing his final lines and he closes his eyes and just feels it 
  • and then its done
  • laura gives him a huge bouquet of flowers and he keeps motioning for the rest of the cast to come on and bow with him again and again bc the theatre just wont shut up and he has to keep coming back and bowing 
  • and then its really done
2

The AU Nobody Asked For. (Samurai of Ga'Hoole) info below cut

Part 2

Yep. I did this. Guardians of Ga’Hoole for the win, my dudes

(The AU below has a lot of canon from book 7 and beyond so if you never read the whole series and don’t understand I’m sorry D=)

Keep reading

Take Me Back to Where We Started by amory

Chapters: 6/6, 27k

Summary: Harry and Louis haven’t spoken since they broke up four years ago. As boarding school sweethearts they once spent every waking moment together, but now they can hardly stand to be in the same room. When their five year class reunion comes around, both boys decide against their better judgement to return and (hopefully) have a good time.

The only problem is, they’re still hopelessly in love.

Starring Harry as the petty ex, Louis as the new James Bond, Niall as a boy genius and fake boyfriend extraordinaire, and Liam and Zayn as two friends just trying to make it out of this weekend alive.

playlist

OK so since @tom-hiddleston-god-of-mischief and other people showed interest, I bumped up my schedule and so…

Here is my ‘Craig is totally gay and was in love with the MC in college’ post!

So, first off- this is Craig Cahn and the thing that made me first think that he was gay instead of bi. (And fyi I am a Bi myself, so this is more headcanoning and exploring character and not trying to stomp on other headcanons, jsyk.)

Yeah the very first time we met. But look- divorces do happen, and do happen in a chill manner. But… let us note a couple things. One, the divorce literally only happened ‘last year’. Which could mean anywhere from (assuming this is the spring due to college letters and school timetables) 12+ to only 3-ish months ago depending on what counts as ‘last year’.

You only get a SECOND of him being uncomfortable while breaking the news before he is on even ground and is like ‘yeah it’s old news and everything is in perfect order now’. AND THE DIVORCE HAPPENED EITHER WHILE SMASHLEY WAS PREGNANT OR JUST HAD RIVER. Now, this could be a him lying, except… it’s never really brought up again as a thing? Like, we deal with Mat’s feelings for his dead wife, Joseph’s failing marriage, and etc but despite how recent it was we are lead to believe their divorce was perfectly amicable despite the timing.  (Now placing a cut here because this gets long and has more pics.)

Keep reading

i found this post in my drafts and have ZERO memory of writing it (thank u alcohol) so im gonna put it in my queue lol
  • ok but imagine 
  • Bitty comes out to his parents but he doesn’t tell them about Jack, thinks it’s for the best, maybe to ease his parents into things or maybe to keep the pool of People Who Know as small as possible 
  • and like yeah Ransom and Holster are super oblivious but Suzanne Bittle is not, not when it comes to her son, because she is a certified Nosy Southern Mother and she can see he’s been acting differently, happier but quieter, always on his phone and blushing when she asks about boys
  • and he talks about the team a LOT 
  • Jack’s one of his best friends and he’s just started his NHL career, so of course Bitty’s never gonna shut up about Jack
  • (Same goes for Shitty and law school. And eventually Ransom and med school. Dicky is proud of his friends and wants everyone to know. He gets that trait from Suzanne, she understands)
  • but he keeps talking about this one Boy, how sweet he is and how his smile is like a sack of puppies and how bitty’s always making this boy do things with him like baking and getting froyo and going shopping and Suzanne is like. Yes. This must be Dicky’s secret boyfriend. 
  •  the next family weekend or whatever, Suzanne demands to meet this Chowder boy who’s stolen Bitty’s heart
  • Bitty is both confused and mortified

Keep reading

6

Gotta make you understand


There’s an actual explanation behind this: I quoted a line from a fic where Viktor suggested this song for Phichit to use in a program as a joke. Then my friend @kiazareni pointed out that this could actually work for Viktor for real. And then there was the realization of just how much this fits with @kazliin ‘s famous fic and I haven’t been the same person ever since, and I’m truly sorry.

where the lines overlap (m)

Originally posted by kths

jimin x reader red strings of fate soulmates! au

8.8k words

rated m for dirty talk, creampie kink, idk i just wanted to write a jimin soulmate au but whoops my finger slipped?? :/

recommended music: where the lines overlap by paramore! it’s my favourite paramore song EVER :)

Summary: there’s an ancient Chinese folklore of the red strings of fate that connect one person to another. These two people connected by the red thread are destined lovers, and the magical, invisible thread may tangle or stretch, but it will never sever. You’ve never believed in these mystical threads of fate like everyone else, but one day you suddenly gain the ability to see the threads connecting the people around you.


The door slams shut, jolting you out of your peaceful reverie. If it had been anyone else, you’d be beyond annoyed to be interrupted while doing your weekly readings, but not when it’s him. The person in question knocks gently on your door before peeking his head in, strands of his bleached dove gray hair spilling over into his eyes, and you can’t help but smile at the sight of him.

“Hey, I got dinner on the way back,” Jimin’s cheeks round out into a smile that reaches all the way to the crinkles at the corners of his eyes. Every time he comes home he’s constantly sweaty and worn out, but it’s part and parcel of the life he chose as a dance major.

Tossing aside your notes, you follow him out into the small dining area of your shared apartment, still in your sweats. When he makes a move to sit at the table, you give him a playful swat on his chest.

“Shouldn’t you wash up first? If I’d known you were this gross, I wouldn’t have agreed to room with you two years ago,” you pretend to wrinkle your nose at his sweaty form, all while ignoring the way his shirt is moulded to his chest.

“Says the one still in her sweatpants. Looks like someone isn’t that hungry tonight,” Jimin smirks back, reaching across the table to grab the box of takeout that you were in the midst of opening. “I could totally do with those extra calories after Hoseok hyung cracked down on us today…”

“I’m just kidding Chim,” you hastily snatch back the takeout box just as he opens the lid of it, the delicious smell of hot noodles and fried pork slices wafting into the air. “Oh my god this smells so good, I’ve been starving all day!”

“Wait, Jinwoo didn’t come by? It’s your free day right? I thought he usually comes by to hang out in the afternoons,” Jimin pauses in his chewing to study your expression carefully, but you’re too busy inhaling mouthfuls of stir fried noodles.

“Jinwoo oppa said he was busy today,” you say around a mouthful of vegetables and noodles. “He has that huge midterm coming up next week, so I told him he should stay home and study.”

Jimin looks like he’s about to say something snide about your boyfriend of nearly 6 months, so you stuff a large piece of meat into his mouth instead.

“Yes I know, he was busy last week and the week before that too, but we’ve been dating for a while so we don’t need to see each other so often. We’re over that honeymoon stage already.” You say in a dismissive tone, focusing on chasing the remaining few strands of noodles around with your chopsticks and avoiding his gaze.

Keep reading

Promise

He finds Lance waiting on his bed for him when he returns to his room, and can tell from a single glance that Lance knows. That somehow— either because Matt or Coran told him, or because he just understands Keith that well, even after so many months apart— Lance knows exactly what happened while Voltron was fleeing Naxzela. What Keith had been prepared to sacrifice. What he’d nearly done.

Lance looks up at the hiss of the door sliding shut. He hasn’t even changed out of his paladin armor. Not fully. His arm guards and chest plate have been removed and discarded on the floor, but otherwise he looks just as he did when Voltron finally reached the Castle again— singed, disheveled, and staring at Keith with large, mournful eyes.

Keith can’t bring himself to meet those eyes. They’re even more blue than Keith remembers, and so full of hurt it makes Keith’s chest ache. Lance should never have to look that way about anything. Particularly not because of him.

Keith turns away and takes his time removing his black, Marmora armor. He can’t bear to see Lance so upset. Can’t stand the heavy silence between them. The thick tension just waiting to snap. Can’t stand it at all, but also can’t think of anything to say to dispel it. Words were never his forte, after all. He was much better with actions. Except, this time, his actions are what’s causing this situation, and he doesn’t quite know how to handle it.

He hangs his armor in his closet— the one spot of black among all the red and white he’s so used to wearing. A visual reminder of all he’s left behind. All he’s given up so his team can keep moving forward. Across the room, Lance shifts. He shifts, and he clears his throat, and Keith closes his eyes, waiting, as always, for Lance to cut through the tension. For the berate that’s surely on his tongue. For the angry words and endless rants he’s come to expect from Lance.

It doesn’t come, though. When Lance finally speaks, it isn’t loud, or enraged, or anything Keith’s used to. It’s soft, instead. So soft he barely hears it. And so rough and broken it nearly breaks his heart.

“Keith,” Lance murmurs, voice shaking even over that single word. “Why?” Why did you leave? Why did you abandon us? Why did you give up? “You glorious, reckless idiot. Why did you do it?”

Why did you almost let yourself die?

Keith swallows thickly. “Something had to be done,” he answers. “It was the only choice.” He glances over his shoulder at Lance and gives him a sad smile. “After all, the universe needs Voltron. It doesn’t need me.”

“We need you,” Lance protests, standing. He crosses the room in three quick strides and turns Keith to face him, hands gripping Keith’s shoulders like iron vices, and the most serious expression Keith’s ever seen across his face. “I need you.”

And if that isn’t the most ridiculous thing Keith’s ever heard. Because if either of them needs the other, it’s not Lance. It’s not this boy who shines so brilliantly, who is everything Keith has ever wanted to be and more, who could probably charm the whole universe into peace if he really put his mind to it.

Keith’s smile turns wry and he shakes his head. “No you don’t, Lance,” he says, emphatically because he needs Lance to understand. “You don’t need me. Just look at everything you’ve done.” Look at all the people you’ve saved and inspired and encouraged in a way that I never could.

It’s not enough to convey everything Keith thinks about Lance, of course, but he honestly doesn’t think any words in the English language (or any language, even) will ever be enough. There’s no way to describe the way Lance shines in his element. The obvious joy he brings to his flying, and the fierce passion that flares through his fighting. The excitement he exhibits whenever they find a new ally. The way he draws people to him without any actual effort. The way he cares and protects and gives hope wherever he goes.

He’s a much better paladin than he gives himself credit for, and much more valuable to the team than Keith ever could be. Keith’s absence over the past few months has proven that. Has shown Voltron can continue, and even thrive, without him. That they would continue to do so even if Keith had died. They’d still have their heart, after all— it’s right there inside Lance. He’s the drive that pushes them all forward, and the glue that holds them all together, and if Keith can keep that alive by sacrificing himself, he doesn’t consider death too great a loss.

Clearly, however, Lance doesn’t agree. “That’s not what I meant,” he chokes out, voice watery and blue eyes shining with unshed tears. “That’s not what I meant at all, you idiot. This isn’t about the team, or Voltron, or even the whole goddamn universe.” His hands shift, sliding across Keith’s shoulders and up his neck to cup his face. Keith fights not to lean into the warmth of Lance’s hands, but when Lance gently tilts his head back he knows it’s a lost cause. He’s so weak to the man standing in front of him. Weaker still to the way his bright blue eyes bore into Keith, more intense than they’ve ever been before. More urgent. More desperate. More filled with longing.

“I’m your right-hand man, aren’t I?” Lance asks softly, so close now that Keith can feel his warm breath against this skin. “We’re in this together, you and me. I’d follow you to ends of the universe. So just please,” he pleads. “Please. Promise me you won’t go where I can’t follow.”

And how can Keith say no to that?

The tears are falling down Lance’s cheeks now, wet streaks against his dark skin. And, this time, seeing Lance so upset over him, over the near loss of him, Keith’s heart does break. It cracks and shatters under the weight of Lance’s grief, and Keith already knows it will never fully recover. Even if he tries to tape it back together and pretend it’s all alright, there will still be fragments missing— little shards that will belong to Lance, and Lance alone, whether Lance realizes that or not.

Keith closes his eyes and lets out a long breath. He turns his head into Lance’s hand, pressing his lips lightly against Lance’s skin, and if Lance is surprised by the gesture, he doesn’t show it. Doesn’t try to pull away or even protest.

“Ok,” he murmurs against Lance’s hand. “Ok, Lance. I promise.”

He’d do much more for Lance if Lance ever asked it of him, but supposes this promise is a good place to start. And when Lance smiles for the first time all day, and then pulls Keith into a tight embrace, he wonders why he ever thought leaving was a good idea. Lance’s arms are warm around him, more comforting than anything Keith’s ever known, and beneath the palm Keith’s spread flat against Lance’s back, he feels the faint, steady thump of Lance’s heart. Takes comfort in the fact that Lance is alive and well and right there with him. Takes comfort in the fact that Keith himself is still alive to feel it.

And, for now, that is enough.

If you are this type of fan, unfollow me now.

Do not threaten a person’s life because you cannot understand the difference between fantasy and reality. 

Dylan O’Brien does not belong to you. Dylan O’Brien does not belong to me. Dylan O’Brien belongs to Dylan Fucking O’Brien. 

He is his own person and insane fans like these are the reasons why he never goes on Twitter anymore, the reasons why he hates going out, the reasons why he hates the celebrity life that he has. 

Dylan O’Brien is an actor, not a fucking god. He is human just like you and me. He has flaws and faults. He poops. He eats. He can get hurt in accidents. He can die at any given moment (not that I would ever want that, God forbid). He is simply a normal dude who likes to act. 

Do not praise him like he is more than just a person. That’s not what he wants. He just wants to make good films and be proud of his achievements. 

Stop threatening women who work him. That’s the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. The world already makes women pit themselves against each other for male attention, DO NOT GIVE OLD WHITE MEN MORE REASON

Don’t be this kind of fan. Treat Dylan like a human and he will respect you for that. 

Originally posted by dylanobrien

Humans are crazy: research and common industrial use of ridiculously dangerous chemicals

Recently read up on some of the most dangerous chemicals mankind has ever developed and some of the stuff scientists have been able to discover is terrifyingly awesome.

Take Chlorine trifluoride for example. It can basically be summed up as the chemical that can make just about anything ignite.
It is a better oxidation agent than oxygen and can set fire to things most sane people would consider fire proof.

Things chlorine trifluoride can ignite: glass, asbestos, concrete, sand and things that are already burnt.

Imagine an alien coming across information about this chemical.

“Excuse me, I’ve found this entry about a highly combustible compound that has been developed. Would you care to explain its uses? According to these reports it’s far too dangerous for any practical purpose.”

“Ah yes. That’s a very interesting case. The main modern use for the chemical is to clean certain lab and industrial equipment”

“That seems spectacularly over zealous for a simple sterilization agent.”

“Well that’s not what it was originally developed for.”

“Dare I ask what it was supposed to be used for?”

“War. It was developed during our Second World War as a weapon. Thankfully it never saw use due to it being too volatile.”

“Your species development a chemical that can set fire to stone specifically to fight using it. And now you just use it to sterilize equipment.
Remind me to call for a human chemist when there is an order regarding explosives.”