this is the funniest I can get

anonymous asked:

Hey can you do 73 and 89 from the drabble challenge when you get a chance?

I’m pregnant.Are you drunk?

Shawn took a swig of the beer he was nursing, and looked around the party to find you. He smiled when he saw you talking with some of your friends, and walked over to you. “Hey, baby.” He smiled.

“Hey!” You giggled, looking up at your boyfriend. “Sh-Shawn, guess what!” You smiled.

“Um, what?” He asked, smile on his lips. 

I’m pregnant!” You thought you were the funniest thing, and Shawn shook his head. 

“Baby, are you drunk?”He asked, taking the cup out of your hand. It didn’t take much for you to lose yourself when you drank, and Shawn knew it.

“No!” You shook your head, obviously lying. 

Shawn nodded, taking your hand. He set the empty bottle he had in the trash, and opened the door. He tapped a few buttons on his phone, and looked at you. “Let’s get you home, silly.” 

The funniest & coolest thing happened today

So at school today (2nd day of school wooh) we are doing ice breakers to get ourselves used our peers.

We had to do this thing were we all get a hard boiled egg that we draw a face on it then pass it to each other (we’re standing in a circle of 44ppl) and it represents a child going through the education. And how we are fragile and some can break.

So basically I made my egg (I named it sharkeisha cause why not amirght) and then I hid it behind my chair. :P

When we were all done the principle examined all the eggs and explained to us how some eggs broke and never were able to make it (making a metaphor to bad decisions etc).

And when he asked where my egg was I said “Oh my egg was homeschooled, I don’t want my child in public education”.

The the funniest thing happened, one of the teachers took my egg and threw it on the ground and screamed “HOME SCHOOLED CHILDREN ARE FRAGILE TOO!”

The Signs Based On The People I Know Who Are Those Signs
  • Aries: Strong, hard-headed, funny, independent, can't stay mad at them, determined, smart, hardworking
  • Taurus: Dependable, loyal, great friends, awesome people to just chill with, great first impressions, smart.
  • Gemini: Adorable, so cool to be around, hardworking, persistent, makes the funniest jokes, holds the best conversations, random.
  • Cancer: Bossy but cares so much, leader, amazing friend, planner, organized, headstrong, not the person to get into an argument with, careful.
  • Leo: Cold frame holds a warm heart, flirty, casual, smart, sneaky, good friend, touchy, actually a good person deep down.
  • Virgo: Quiet warrior, does so much without recognition, leader, intelligent, best talker, gives the best advice, loyal, some can be annoying at times but love them anyway.
  • Libra: Positive, conscious, loving, patient, stronger than they think, protective, needs assurance they are loved even though they always are, kind.
  • Scorpio: The biggest hearted person you'll ever meet, loves deep, jealous, huge walls built, secretive, loyal, loveable, will always forgive even those who dont deserve it, best friends.
  • Sagittarius: Loud, funny, raw sense of humor always has fun wherever they go, can easily hide emotions, promiscuous, hates being trapped, dreamers, center of attention, loyal to all friends, once you make them leave they are gone forever.
  • Capricorn: Amazing, overcomes hurt quickly, gives advice but it might not always be good, has your best interests at heart, loveable, judges but for good merit, jealous, protective.
  • Aquarius: Social, clever, rebellious, can hold back emotions well, almost everything they say is sarcastic, dresses original, some of the best people to shop with.
  • Pisces: Compassionate, falls so hard sometimes they don't know how to get back up, imaginative, best to hold deep conversations with, a little oversensitive, can't ever decide, open-minded
2

After three years on Teen Wolf, you’ve had your fair share of makeout scenes. What’s been your biggest revelation?
Make sure they don’t have oral herpes. We have a couple of cast members who have cold sores, and when they have outbreaks, kissing scenes legally have to be rescheduled. I am not getting mouth herpes from Teen Wolf. You can take my dignity, but you’ll not take my lack of mouth herpes.

10

“What is the weirdest or funniest thing that’s happened to you guys on set?” ()

I went to G-A-Y in Manchester after my 1989 show and I was dancing to Billie Piper when my friend asked me to go outside with her so she could smoke.
Just as we got to the bottom of the stairs I stopped, grabbed her hand and said “wait, wait, wait. My Taylor senses are tingling” AND THEN 22 STARTED PLAYING AND I SHIT YOU NOT EVERYONE AROUND WHO HEARD ME SAY IT WERE JUST STARING OPEN MOUTHED AS I SCREAMED AND RAN BACK TO THE DANCE FLOOR

The Types according to similarminds.com

I picked the “funniest” and strangest things that this website wrote as parts of the description of every type. Enjoy. (some types had more weird descriptions than others)

ISFP: “prone to discontentment”

ESFP: “dislikes science fiction”, “values organized religion”

ISTP: “can be insensitive to the misfortunes of others”, “anti-tattoos, anti counter culture”

ESTP: “content”

ISTJ: “does not appreciate strangeness”, “anti-tattoos”

ESTJ: “does not like weird or strange people / things - intolerant of differences”

ISFJ: “prone to crying”, “afraid of many things”

ESFJ: “loves getting massages”

INFJ: “attracted to sad things”

ENFJ: “anti-tattoos”

INTJ: “not much fun”, “familiar with darkside” (bonus: “dictator” was among the favored careers)

ENTJ: “desires fame/acclaim, image focused, narcissistic”

INTP: "does not think they are weird but others do", “does not like happy people”, “more likely to support marijuana legalization”

ENTP: “experience junky”, “pro-weed legalization”(this time is no doubt true, apparently) (bonus: “dictator”, “assassin”, “cia agent” and “fbi agent” were among the favored careers) I really envy ENTPs now, or I want one as my friend

INFP: “wounded at the core” you have no idea how much I laughed, “prone to dreaming about a rescuer”

ENFP: “attracted to strange things”, “easily talked into doing silly things”

Okay so here’s one for you guys!

I had the funniest dream I had to share. 

So, Marinette started working for Gabriel Agreste as a pupil (1. Because she’s really good and 2. Because he thinks she will be a suitable partner for Adrien).  They’re older, probably in their early twenties, and I don’t think they know who the other was.  It didn’t feel like they did.

Well an Akuma attacks and not only does Marinette (not Ladybuy but Marinette) save Mr. Agreste and Adrien but she defeats it (she just can’t purify it so the butterfly gets away) all on her own.

Mr. Agreste and Adrien are just kind of starring at her in awe.  She embarrassed and runs away claiming she needs to get them a doctor while both men just kind of stare at her slack jawed.

And the best part of dream, that forced me awake because it made me laugh, was Mr. Agreste turning to Adrien and saying “Make her your wife or she becomes your new mother.”

I woke up laughing.  I had to sit up because I couldn’t breathe after that.

  • what he says: i'm fine
  • what he means: you know not everything has to be a joke. sometimes you can just be honest about your feelings, and that's how i see myself, you know? i may not be the most threatening silhouette, but i like to think of myself as somebody who can stand up for-- you know it doesn't always have to be "goof goof dildo machines" over here, okay? i'm traveling around with the Boner Squad and i never get to just say... what i'm feeling, i have emotions! it's not all abra-ca-fuckyou and what have you!! i have a beating heart!!! i'm multi-dimensional! i'm a fully-realized creation... fUCK!!!!!

Finally @caspar_lee & I can reveal project Jaspar! We made a feature film!!! Had the funniest time driving around Europe with my roommate in a campervan YOU NEED THIS FILM IN YOUR LIFE. Pre order link is in my Instagram Bio! :) p.s. It’s because of your amazing support I get the opportunity to do crazy things like this. I’m forever grateful lav ya!

Made with Instagram
Regarding the humour in Civil War

The reason it works so much better in Civil War than it does in Age of Ultron is that instead snappy (and often out of character) one-liners that are pithy and memorable but seem to come out of nowhere, the funniest moments are the exchanges between two characters that reveal something about their relationship:

“Can you move your seat up?” “No.”

“I’m Clint.” “I don’t care.”

“Who is speaking?” “It’s your conscience.”

“You couldn’t have done that earlier?” “I hate you.”

The trick to making large ensemble casts work is to highlight the diversity of the various two-person relationships, and Civil War does that brilliantly. In a movie with this many supporting roles, it couldn’t just be about Steve/Tony and Steve/Bucky, even though those are the obvious ones. 

We also get explorations of Sam/Bucky (which works wonderfully well and was exactly what I wanted), Steve/Nat, T’Challa/Nat, T’Challa/Bucky, Tony/Rhodey, Tony/Bucky, Wanda/Vision, Wanda/Clint, Clint/Nat, Tony/Peter, Sam/Scott…I could go on. Almost every possible pairing of characters gets a moment in the spotlight that sheds some light on a nuance of their relationship, and that often plays out through humour. 

To me, Civil War was the funniest Marvel movie so far, and it manages to balance that with scenes of gut-wrenching emotion, but in a natural and well-paced way. It’s always a good sign when a nearly three-hour long movie feels short.

10

Inside the pixelated imagination of Italian artist @the_oluk

To see more of Manolo’s pixel art creations, follow @the_oluk on Instagram.

“I asked myself, ‘Will I be able to draw something appealing in such a small area?’” says Manolo Saviantoni (@the_oluk). The art director from Ciampino, Italy, began creating these characters in a limited pixel drawing area as a game to play with his daughters. “The funniest thing was getting home at night and asking my daughters to guess who those characters are.”

Manolo soon realized there was a wider audience for his art online. “I created my own pixel art style and began to post those creations on Instagram,” Manolo says. “My works are usually inspired by video games, films and cartoons. It is wonderful to know that you can make people smile through tiny colored squares.”

LAMEN. I couldn’t get OVER it. xD

Either it’s a joining of Laurent and Damen’s names… or Laurent was subtly making fun of Damen. Still one of the funniest, BEST parts of the book! So here’s a doodle for you guys since I can’t seem to work on anything other than these two dorks… ¬___¬’

  • Y'all: omg omg omg talk to us in English we can't understand Korean please say something in English I wanna see how good your pronounciation is *_* <3
  • Idols: *add English in their songs, makes efforts to read things in English in interviews, talk shows, v-app streams etc*
  • Y'all: *make videos titled "50 of KPOP's Unintentionally Funniest English Lyrics", "KPOP English test", "KPOP English Fails", "misheard lyrics" etc*
  • Y'all: LOLOL "she got me gOAT crazy" rofl!!!! why do they even speak in English if they can't even get the pronounciation/grammar right??? lmaooooOOOoo
  • Y'all: why won't they write to or communicate with us in English anymore??? ugh they wouldn't be half as popular as they are now without us international fans the least they can do is communicate with us in English!!! ughhhh
  • Me: *stares into the camera like I'm on The Office*
Funniest story

Ok so a couple years ago for Christmas I made my dad a cd and I put his favorite songs on there and then as a joke I put I can’t dance from high school musical followed by girls just wanna have fun as a joke never expecting him to listen to them and one night I went out to eat with my friends but there was a long wait so we went next door to dollar general and I get a phone call from my dad and apparently he had butt dialed me because he is singing GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUUNNN at the top of his lungs and I started laughing so hard I accidentally hit the speaker button and so then everyone in the store just hears THATS ALL THEY REALLY WAAAANT IS SOME FUUUUN GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUUNNN and that is the story of my dad’s singing debut at dollar general aka the funniest thing that ever happened to me