this is the best thing jfc


a ship that needs more love >> emmett & rosalie cullen

I got luckier than I deserved. Emmett is everything I would have asked for if I’d known myself well enough to know what to ask for. He’s exactly the kind of person that someone like me needs. And, oddly enough, he needs me, too.

post-Jackady concept I could not resist: 

“… do you think he knows?” Adrien asks Plagg warily after his father’s left post-hug, covering the ring self-consciously and not really sure how to feel about basically anything that’s happened since the whole mess started. 

“He knoooooooooooooows,” Plagg hisses with 5000+ years of experience with bad luck, ears going flat and tail bristling and eyes bugged out all paranoid. 

(it’s not paranoia if they’re ACTUALLY an evil butterfly-man out to get you, of course, but TECHNICALLY THE VERDICT IS STILL OUT ON THAT.) 

So Adrien, also feeling kind of paranoid now, starts wearing more jewelry to make the ring less noticeable/noteworthy. He gets a couple bracelets, he buys a few more rings, he thinks about getting his ears pierced but isn’t sure how that’d work with the transformation. And he COMMISSIONS one more ring, just in case. One that looks exactly like his Miraculous. 


Five minutes into this experiment, Nino’s like “cool bracelet, dude, it new?”, Marinette is dYING in the row behind them because Adrien ACCESSORIZES now? that’s just a thing she has to DEAL WITH now??, and Adrien and Plagg have both already forgotten which ring is which, because they are Adrien and Plagg, jfc you two. 

Cue a VERY AWKWARD head-bonk for Plagg the first time he tries to jump into the wrong ring. Repeatedly. PLAGG NOT THAT ONE THE OTHER–okay maybe THIS one–?? 

In the distance: explosions and screaming. 

Maybe this was not their BEST plan, Adrien thinks in mild panic. 

anonymous asked:

hi! you know a lot about sex, and also writing. there's a fanfic trope that i have questions about two men realize their love, make out, want sex. but alas--no lube. never fear, one character grabs whatever is nearby for lube. i've seen lotion (as a person w/ a vagina this makes me terrified of irritation, but okay), vaseline, cooking oil? toothpaste?? whipped cream??? is it safe to put such things in one's butt? would that even be effective as lube? thank you.

Good question! There are many lubricating agents that reduce friction. MOST OF THESE AGENTS DO NOT BELONG IN THE BODY.

Fanfiction requires the reader to suspend disbelief, but there are moments when you simply can’t. Lube, like love confessions and mindblowingly good sex every single time it’s had, is the sort of thing that writers tend to hand wave, although some of the stuff used in fiction as lubricant boggles my fucking mind. Here is a list of acceptable and non-acceptable lubricants for fictional and RL sexy times.

Types of Personal Lubricant:

- Water-based: This is the best overall lubricant to use, as it does not interfere with latex condoms or silicone toys, is absorbed into the body without any issue, and doesn’t irritate the skin. The only drawbacks are that it can be absorbed by the body too quickly, being water-based and all, and it isn’t the best when it comes to anal sex (more on that in a moment). When using water-based lube, one may need to reapply a few times and steer clear of having sex in pools or the bath (as water-based lube will dissolve in water). 

- Silicone: Slipperier, thicker, and longer lasting than water-based lubricant, which makes it a favorite when it comes to anal sex. The thickness of silicone helps cut way down on friction (as the anal cavity does not provide its own lubricant the way the vagina does). However, silicone lube has its drawbacks as well. It’s been reported that some people’s skin reacts to using it. Also, it shouldn’t be used with silicone or jelly-based toys, as silicone molecules don’t react well with other silicone products, and this reaction can lead to the breakdown of the toy. Silicone lube is okay for harder materials, like glass, metal, and hard plastic. 

- Oil-based: While it has the benefit of lacking chemical additives, oil-based lube has a nasty tendency to break down latex condoms. I repeat: do not use oil-based lube with latex. 

Acceptable Lube found in fiction:

- The types of lube listed above (Astroglide, KY, etc.)
- Olive oil: Fine if condoms aren’t being used. 
- Saliva: Wouldn’t recommend using this for penetration; saliva dries quickly and is not enough to cut down on the friction of vaginal or anal sex. Hand jobs are fine, but characters will have to keep licking their hand to maintain optimal wetness.
- Vaseline: Fine if condoms aren’t being used (and if you don’t mind it sticking around for a while. Vaseline is notoriously hard to wash away.). 

Unacceptable Lube found in fiction:

- Butter: If the threat of bacterial infection isn’t enough to put you off, remember that butter is a milk-based product and will spoil. I’ve seen this used in fiction before and I always make the same, horrified face. If your characters are getting it on in the kitchen, have one of them reach for the olive oil instead.
- Hand lotion: Lotion is not for internal use, particularly not for vulvas, vaginas, or anal cavities. If your character is using this to jerk themselves or another penis-owner off, fine. But that’s it.
- Toothpaste: What? Is this a thing? Oh my god, DO NOT USE THIS AS LUBRICANT FULL-STOP JFC
- Whipped cream: See: butter. Also, gross?
- Blood: If you use this as lubricant, I will crawl out of your screen like the girl from The Ring and throttle you.

complex mental problems the signs have (sorry not sorry)

 Aries: A real conformist. They like to look normal, act normal, be normal. While deep down they have this thing that makes them unique and special, I really don’t get it why most of them try to “go with the flow” all the time. For fuck’s sake, you are original, embrace yourself! They are SO afraid of what the other people have to say, that’s why they cannot succeed in life.

Taurus: They always like to be “the good guy” in every situation, they ALWAYS want to present themselves as the most humble person you’ll ever meet. When in reality, deep down, they’re just a weak-ass attention whore who has a boring life and they always try to be at their best because they always follow stereotypes, doesn’t matter how much open-minded they are.

Gemini: Another attention whore. They constantly need approval and assurance by everybody, they’re the MOST FAKE people. Their low self-esteem makes them this person that pops up in your life, suddenly, out of nowhere, assures you things about you (which might not be true), sugarcoats every single one of your problems and when you pay them back with your real goodness for their FAKE goodness, they become mentally stable and they start to believe in themselves. Then they get bored of you and forget that they even had you as a friend. 

Cancer: Cancers are so bitchy. I mean, they always like presenting themselves as that good innocent blonde angel in pink fluffy clothes when in reality they always cheat, they care only about themselves and their family, nobody else.

Leo: Jfc, these people need to chill. (most of them). They talk SO much, they always try to be the center of attention all the time and they always try to have the best things in life. If someone is less successful (on their imaginary scale of success), they see that person as a weakling and nothing more. If a person is more successful on the same scale, they start talking shit about their person behind the person’s back, neglecting every success the person has ever reached, trying to ruin the social image of that person. While behind the mask, they are actually cowards and are terrified and afraid by that person’s success. If they cannot destroy the person’s image, they try to befriend them and stay friends, presenting an image of “the best squad”.

Virgo: Maybe the most judgmental people you’ll ever meet in your entire life.Their ego is so big, they even get depressed, thinking that they’re better than everybody around them, thinking that something is not wrong with themselves. Here we have a reversed big ego when the individual has an immense ego, constantly reassuring themselves that they are not egotistic, but only practical and really successful. But you know what? Stop living inside your forlorn mind and go use your potential because you suck if you drown yourself in self-pity for the rest of your life. And you will never be able to evolve.

Libra: These people are crazy. I mean, CRAZY. Constantly bothering everybody around them with gossips and that kind of things while acting innocent and good, when in reality they don’t fucking realize that THEY are the one who’s spreading gossips. They love acting like social justice warriors, they just cannot live without attention and popularity. It’s disgusting, stop it. Spread your false positivity somewhere else.

Scorpio: Another example of people who want to look like the baddest guy OR the best guy, there’s no in-between. And it’s all because of attention, because they need compliments. In fact, their real goal is to look, act, behave and BE hard-to-get, they love living in the clouds. The scary thing is that they can achieve this very easily because they have natural charm, especially for the ignorant masses. But one day, they will tire themselves trying and close themselves inside them, that’s the price. They will really become unreachable and will end up living alone, isolated somewhere until they overdose and die.

Sagittarius: They have a serious PHOBIA of showing their feelings and revealing how they feel to another person, especially their partner or someone they love very much, while deep down, they feel really hard and true. They are very constructive and productive but sadly, they are so nervous and this makes it almost impossible for someone to love them because they hurt, accidentally or intentionally.

Capricorn: Freaks for success and being the best. Stop trying so hard, for fuck’s sake, be original and spontaneous for once. They always try to be original AND the best at the same time, they only think about working and success and when they achieve it (because they actually HAVE the potential to get what they want) they will get bored and depressed and the only thing that will be able to pull them out of their depression will be… a new task/goal. Stop doing that to yourself, just relax and pay attention to the beautiful things in life.

Aquarius: You can’t win an argument with these people. Not because you can’t but because they won’t let you. Because talk too much and probably aren’t paying attention to your opinion and what you’re saying in the conversations. The thing is, they act like they do pay attention about what you have to say. They have this need of being the most intelligent person (and they are very intelligent but they’re definitely NOT the most intelligent, they’re only just a show-off). Know-it-alls beyond borders. Jfc, y’all need to think before you speak. And stop acting so intelligent, you’re not stupid if you don’t understand maths or chemistry, gosh. Just relax and admit your mistakes, you’ll learn more that way and you’ll put your intelligence and potential in good use.

Pisces: Ugh, where do I even start with these. The thing is, they can morph into every one of the signs mentioned above. When in reality, they are only manipulators who are good at acting and making y’all feel wonderful and all that stuff but it’s sad because they’re probably using you for their own goals. They can be so cold-hearted and materialistic on purpose. Too bad because they have immense potential, they could be very successful in a good way. But it’s not them to blame, but the cruel society they live in, because Pisces are actually never born evil, they become this vengeful monstrosity that society has created. Don’t underestimate them and stay away from them if you mean to harm them.

Four Fics : One Day

Four fics done in one day. One one shot and three chapters.
Here we g o

Things are awkward in Pottery Barn

(Better known as the Arcade!AU)
Jeremy tries to interact with Evan at work.

Wake Up

(Better known as the Angel Evan AU)
Connor Murphy comes across a mysterious boy who doesn’t seem to be wearing any clothe. Decides its best to help him and buys him some

Empty Looking Eyes : Chapter Three

(Thats right! ELE has been updated!)
Evan gets stuck in a predicament, Connor Murphy has finally woken up and Evan fears something bad might just happen now. He was surprised by what actually went down, and a little relived, for it was only a small conversation.

Party Overdose : Chapter Nine

(I can hear everyone screaming now, Party Overdose is finally back on track…sort of.)
Evan can feel something being yanked from him, a part of him goes missing, but what is it?

Caeseria’s Yuri!!! on ICE fic rec post

As a writer I don’t read much (cause I’m usually writing), and instead rely on recs myself before I leap in to something, but there’s a few gems I have found out there on my own that I thought I’d share myself.  I’m staying away from the super popular stuff that everyone is reading, in the hope that some of the less mega-popular fic gets some love!

In no particular order, here are my favourites:

Freeze Pop by delightedgurgle  - YuYuu – Explicit (warning for underage) 1.5k
Premise: “Do you even understand what the term sexual means? If you suck then my win means nothing.”

**Yuri P takes one for the team and shows Yuuri K. how things are done.  Yuuri & Yurio’s characterization in this is brilliant. One of the best YuYuu fics out there I’ve currently found on my travels through the A03.

A Fellow With a One-Track Mind by ken_ichijouji (dommific) – Explicit 4k
Victor decides in order to help Yuuri land quads more consistently, he should have some kind of reward system.  (AKA Victor strips every time Yuuri lands a quad fic.)

**This is genius, and quite funny in places!

Maelstrom by feelslikefire – Explicit – 44k
Victor Nikiforov is poised to win gold in his fifth consecutive Grand Prix Final. He has the world at his feet, is unparalleled in the sport–right up until a snowstorm blows into Sochi, and he finds himself repeating the same day over and over and over. He stumbles over Yuuri Katsuki, and everything changes.  (Or, the time loop au. Loosely based on Groundhog Day.)

**I can’t not rec this story, even if it is popular.  Damn, this is awesome…I like the folk-tale aspect to the background story, and it’s a hugely absorbing read.  Do give this a go if you haven’t yet!

Victor Effing Nikiforov by shysweetthing – Explicit – 13k
AU in which Yuuri still doesn’t remember the banquet, somehow doesn’t blow Japanese Nationals, runs into Victor at the World Championships, and has absolutely no idea why his idol is suddenly friendly and incredibly handsy. Does Yuuri care about his reasons? No. It’s Victor Effing Nikiforov.

**This is another hilarious but great one. Well worth the read :)

Immaculate Dream, Made Breath and Skin by @rcmclachlan - Explicit - 3k
Almost half his life has been spent training for the day that Victor Nikiforov takes him to bed, so when it finally happens after the Grand Prix Final, Yuuri’s prepared. More than prepared: he’s ready. No one’s ever touched him as a lover, sure, but there’s nothing that he hasn’t already dreamed about doing or having done to him to make anything that could happen a shock. But apparently Victor’s sole purpose in life is to subvert all his expectations. 

**This is about the hottest, filthiest thing I’ve ever read (which is saying something based on my own writing) and it’s freaking awesome. Book a bunk for once you’ve finished reading this. Maybe for the weekend. 

am i dancing sexy yet (i can’t wait to make your body my own) by @notcaycepollard - Explicit - 1.7k
“Victor,” Yuuri murmurs. “What did you do, nights before a big competition? You never got nervous energy you couldn’t work off?” “Well,” Victor says like he’s considering. “To tell you the truth, times like that, I would mostly jerk off,“ and that’s enough to give Yuuri some ideas.

**Eros!Yuuri teasing Victor. Yum :)

Nine-tails by DeeNuke - Gen - 22k
A nine-tailed Kitsune is waiting for the moments of its ascending, but discovers they’re trapped on Earth even after growing their ninth tail.

**Yeah, yeah. You are all making “OMG, Caeseria read G-rated fic!” faces.  Trust me, this story is fabulous. Lot’s of well-crafted atmosphere and folk-tale elements with kitsune!Victor in a kimono. Gorgeous story.

The Boyfriend Experience by cryingoverspilledvodka - Explicit - WIP - 120k
Katsuki Yuuri is an accomplished escort at 23, operating under the pseudonym Eros, in Detroit. When one of his favourite clients sets him up with none other than world-renowned figure skater Victor Nikiforov, the delicate balance between Yuuri’s personal and professional life teeters ever closer towards ruin.

**Good lord, why are more people not reading this? The author says the full draft is finished, and chapters are being edited for publishing weekly.  Totally absorbing, well-characterized, and the sex is smoking hot. Holy shit.  Go read this. (if you are worried about Yuuri getting it on with OC’s or stuff, not to worry, this is strictly Victuuri, with past mentions of previous stuff).

Twenty-Five Hours by 0lizzybennet0 - Mature - 23K  (WIP)
In which Yuuri spends a 25 hour flight next to Victor Nikiforov, skating legend, and feels it might simultaneously be the best and worst thing that has ever happened to him.

**Again with the why are more people not reading this??! Gah, I ADORE this story.  I mainlined the whole thing yesterday and I can’t wait for the last chapter.

For the Camera by @noon30ish - Explicit - 41K (WIP) 
In which Yuuri becomes a pornstar and is ‘training’ under the one and only, the Living Legend, Vitya.Or the fic where, for Yuuri, sex comes first and love comes after.

**JFC, I laughed my head off at the bad porn tropes. They’re all there, along with a compelling story line (IKR?) and Princess Bride references. I love this story. Porn with Feeling indeed!! GO READ THIS NOW. 

five theories about victor "my husband” nikiforov (+ one fact) by @dadvans - General - 2.5K
No one knows the truth about the strange, well-paying man who comes into the bar three times a week and only talks about his husband. But everyone has their theories.

**This is one of the funniest things I think I’ve ever read.  Not to be missed for brilliant catchphrases like “my husband’s husband” and “our dog”. You’ll see why. ;)

Hot Russian daddy fucks a horny Japanese slut [AKA Viktor Nikiforov/Yuuri Katsuki REAL sex tape leaked] by Krtek - Explicit - 15K
An extremely private video of Yuuri and Viktor gets posted online, sending the internet and general public into a shitstorm.

**I love social media fic, and this is one of the best.  Strangely compelling, and not to be missed for the last chapter.  I really enjoy seeing Victuuri from an internet POV.  Do give this one a read, you won’t be sorry!  This fic needs more love!

An Examination of Stamina by Viktor Nikiforov by Anonymous_Ostrich - Explicit - 4.5K
“Viktor…” Yuuri’s voice was low and gravelly, his teeth grazing the bend of Viktor’s neck, “Is it really okay to keep going?” His cock stirred inside of Viktor, still rock hard, still eager. The feeling of Yuuri’s semen trickling slowly out of his stretched hole made Viktor shiver, and he grabbed Yuuri’s chin in his hand, yanking his face up so that their eyes could meet.“I’ll say this once, Yuuri. Give me everything you’ve got. Don’t stop even if I beg for you to.”

**Ahem. *clears throat* THIS is the fic that made me hang my mouth open and thank the internet gods for this filthy, filthy, masterpiece featuring a fucked-out Victor Nikiforov. Boy, does Yuuri have legendary stamina. Woot!! <3

Rec me some things in the comments!! What are your favourites? I love a good read.  Feel free to reblog this as well to share the love with the fandom!!

xxsincerely-insanityxx  asked:

What is your favorite fetus Ziam moment and most recent Ziam moment?

Every ziam will say it’s so hard to choose fave ziam moments bc there’s so many good ones! (all of them) 😩😂 but thank you for the ask!!

This is definitely one of the earliest and cutest ziam moments that I love. THE PURE HAPPINESS! Zayn just smooshing his face into liam’s and liam wasn’t even accustomed to all the touchy feely gestures the boys would give him yet but he doesn’t pull away or anything and he smiles aw

After that one it would have to be germany!ziam in 2012 wow what a blessing that was for us and for them

p.s this chin caressing thing of theirs pains me in the best way, always

they had a whole couch and they chose to sit practically in each other’s laps and I’m still crying to this day about it, look at the fucking thirst on zayn jfc get him some water please im concerned

can’t forget the bed interview that germany brought us as well

and for my fave most recent ziam moment?

let’s be real I’ll take anything ziam give me now a days a.k.a social media interactions (limited) and cartier jewellery and matching outfits but also this gem

of course I love zayn. he’s great (why would you ask me such a dumb question?)



hmmm ok so i love this plot i just had to write about it as fast as i could

its for a lovely anon yep yuppidily doO sORRY ITS BEEN IN MY ASK BOX FOR SO LONG AND I NEVER MADe IT SSHGGG

- aight so ever since mark was young, he trained to become the best knight in all the land

- he learned about his enemies and he’s friends

- he always trained with his pals

- they called themselves 

- “the dream knights”

- lame name ik 


- “fucking lame??!?!//? is that how you disrespect me?!??!/@ your amazing friend??!?/2/1/”

- honestly jeno gets shook everytime


- marks knight legion thing has always been your legion enemy

- y'all have been fighting since the beginning 

-  mark didn’t really know who you were

- until that fateful day

- you were seeking around his land

- and he found you on his way to the washroom

“jfc all i wanted to do was pee in peace”

- you guys had a sword duel

- and you won 

- so ever since then, he’s been training EXTRA hard to fight you and beat you

- when y'all attack again, he goes out to find you

- he see’s you settling renjun and low-key gets jealous cause

- he trained just to fight you and now renjuns fighting you??

- as he’s watching, he realizes how good you look

- not just when you’re fighting, but in general

- ofc u beat renjun

- so u turn around to see mark standing right behind you with his lips slightly parted


- y'all start fighting

- and like

- u guys aren’t even trying

- ur just getting lost in each others eyes during the battle

- tbh he literally gives up

- “eYY wanna ditch?”

- no- we’re literally- jfc we r literally in the middle of a fight r u dumb” - u

- honestly mark 

- but u decide to ditch anyway cause like, its mark amirite

- aight so y'all ditch

- and it becomes annual

- like evrytime ur legions fight, u guys ditch

- lmAO thE drEAm tEaM fOunD ouT

- “moorK?!? is that y/n!???1 oUR enEMy!@?!? ooOooo I’m telling taeyong”

- “don’t YOU DA Re”

- its gucci tho

- lol but the dreamies told taeyonG

- but did he care??? no not really actually 

- anyway

- so like u guys meet up a lot LIKE 

- hella everyday

- and u guys have like deep ass convos 

- “why are we enemies”

- “bc like 678 years ago ur legion stole bread from ours”

- lol truth

- onE dAy 

- you guys were having another deep ass convo a the just

- pecks???your???lips???



- que marks cute lil giggle

- mark giggling = you giggling

- “giGGle”





- he like always pecks ur cheeks

- n it makes u blush

- he also compliments u a lot

- “wow ur so good!”

- “ye cause I’m better than u”

- mark silently cries at night

- u guys always compare like gear and stuff

- who has the better sword

- who has the better armour

- lmao u always have the better shit tho


- but didn’t rly care

-”ahhh young love”

- lolol 

- you guys like ended the 678 year war

- not rly

- but kind of cause your leaders didn’t really care much

- “if they’re in love, then whats the point? we can’t break them up”

- so like no more figHts but there r still a lot of grudges

- like the dreamy with mark not telling them for 4 months

- so

- in conclusion, mark is a babe and djdjskjksjksjskjsk 


A Hairy Situation

Anon Request:  This is probably soooo typical.. But can I request a BuckyxReader where they end up having to share a bed (mission with limited sleeping space?) And she gets her hair tangled in the joints of his mechanical arm? *has long hair and wonders about this*

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: Explicit Language, and you may die laughing.

Word Count: 1,488

A/N: Just, promise me you guys will tell me how hard you laughed. Because my stomach hurts. Enjoy! - x.T

Your name: submit What is this?

           You, Bucky, and Steve had all been shipped out to a seaside town in Greece. You were supposed to take down a leader of a large terrorist group that happened to be in the area. Well, you usually arrived the day before at the destination, before receiving the full set of orders the next night.

           The three of you guys had been squished into a small two bedroom house, which was fit specifically for missions. You don’t know how HQ managed to get all the tech in the house so early, but you didn’t want to know.

           After a long day of scouting stealth routes to the target, you were ready to shower and go to bed. It was hot in Greece, and being in the sun all day left you sweaty and baking in your uniform. The two soldiers came into the house smelling heavily of body sweat and something else that wasn’t very appealing to a woman’s nose.

           Steve unclipped his shield and sighed, “I’m going to shower.” He then disappeared down the hall, carrying his shield with him.

           You muttered, “Good, you smell like ass.” Bucky was downing a glass of water and managed to hear you, he choked on the water, and slammed the glass down. The water sputtered out of his mouth and into the sink, and he began coughing and laughing.

           “You okay there, Barnes?” You asked, trying not to smile as you raised your brows at him. He was leaning against the granite counter and recovering from the coughing fit he had. Bucky wiped his mouth and nodded, his eyes closed, and a huge grin on his face.

           Bucky’s voice shook, “Y-Yeah, I’m good, Y/N.” He sat up and set the glass in the sink, not trusting himself with drinking water at the moment.

           “Alright, I’m going to go change,” You pointed to the hallway, “Promise you won’t choke on water out here by yourself?”

           “Yeah, Y/N. You can go.” He rolled his eyes, and you shook your head as you made your way down the hall. At the end of the hall, there was only three doors, and one door was for the bathroom.

           You groaned, “I don’t want to share a room…” You opened the door nearest and saw that Bucky had already put his stuff on the bed, and you guessed Steve would’ve put his stuff in the other room. The real decision was who you would rather spoon. You bit your lip and decided on Bucky, because knowing Steve, he would be suffocating you against him.

           “You left your stuff on the couch.” Bucky came walking down the hall behind you with your duffel bag for the mission slung over his shoulder. He brushed past you into the room he claimed, and set the bag next to his. Bucky turned towards you, “We are sharing a room, right?”

           You nodded slowly and moved over to the bag, getting your mind off the fact that you will be sleeping next to the amazing specimen beside you, by hoping Steve saved some warm water for you. You unzipped the bag and finally replied, “Yeah, just promise me you don’t sleep naked.” You would actually really enjoy it if he was naked, but you had to keep up your façade.

           “I promise, I don’t sleep naked.” He chuckled, before he shot you a wink, “Sometimes.” You gaped at him, before lightly punching his metal arm. Bucky had a shit-eating grin on his face as he bent down and kicked his boots off, he picked them up and set them next to the nightstand. He then began unstrapping his vest and you quickly grabbed your clothes, knowing damn well that Bucky would have no shame, and get changed in front of you.

           You ducked out of the room and saw Steve’s bedroom door was closed, so you were glad he was finished in the bathroom. Locking the bathroom door, you sighed, and kicked your shoes off. You were going to enjoy this shower, before you head off to bed.

           By the time Bucky slid under the covers next to you, you were already passed out cold. He watched your peaceful form, a tender smile garnishing his features, as he took the moment to really admire you. You were vulnerable and Bucky enjoyed seeing you like this; your features slackened, your hair sprawled over the pillow, and soft snores escaping your mouth.

           Bucky leaned over to kiss your temple, before he whispered, “Goodnight, darling.” He then flipped over and let out a deep breath, allowing himself to relax, and yet hoping he would wake up with you in his arms.

           Your eyes fluttered open and you shifted, before you froze. You and Bucky had gravitated towards each other during the night, and you were tucked against his body, with his metal arm draped loosely around you. Bucky was nuzzled into your hair, his warm breath fanning over your neck, and your legs were tangled with his.

           You went to lift your head and your hair was yanked roughly, you yelped, and collapsed against Bucky. He jolted beneath you and he moved his face out of your hair. Bucky shifted his metal arm and you whimpered, “Bucky! Don’t move!” He froze and looked down at you, his face awfully close to yours.

           Bucky furrowed his brow and asked softly, “What’s wrong?”

           “My hair is stuck in your arm…” You sighed resting your head against his bare chest. He bit his lip, trying not to laugh, but his stomach kept convulsing. You knew he was struggling to stop himself from laughing at you. You groaned, “Go ahead, laugh your ass off..”

           Bucky chuckled and shook his head, “No, I can’t. I’m sorry, but how did this happen?”

           “I don’t know?” You shrugged, “I guess we sleep cuddled.”

           “You sure about that, darling?” Bucky quirked an eyebrow, and you glared up at him. He then looked at his left arm, seeing your hair knotted within the metal divots, and he visibly winced. “Let’s try and get you free.”

           Bucky clutched you to his chest, with his arm wrapped around your back, trying to help you get your hair out of the divots in his metal arm. He kept chuckling every time you made a painful yelp, when he accidentally tugged your hair too hard, and you finally slumped against his chest. The body heat between the both of you made it hot, and Bucky’s skin was clammy.

           “Buck, we might have to get Steve..” You whined, your forehead was pressed against his bare shoulder. He smiled and rested his cheek against your hair. 

           Bucky chuckled, “He’s not going to let me live this down, darling.” He rubbed your back, keeping his metal arm as still as possible for you. The metal was locked up tightly and he hadn’t been able to relax the arm.

           “Who cares at this point?” You huffed, “I already ripped half my hair out with it stuck in your damn arm.” Bucky rolled his eyes and pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

           He then shouted, “STEVE!”

           It was quiet for a few moments.

           The soldier blasted through the door, shirtless, and pant-less with his shield in hand. He looked around the room frantically for any signs of danger, before his gaze fixed onto you and Bucky clinging to each other in the bed. Steve furrowed his brow and asked, “Why did you yell for me?”

           You turned your head, wincing when your hair was being tugged, and said, “Because my hair got stuck in his metal arm and we can’t get it out.”

           Steve set his shield against the wall before a huge grin spread over his face. “Your hair. Got stuck. In his arm.” He then doubled over in laughter, and Bucky snorted.

           You glared at Steve, and snapped, “Can you just help?”

           “Yeah—Yeah, just…I’ll be right back.” He chuckled, before stumbling out of the room. You sighed and relaxed against Bucky, knowing things will be a bit different now that you had been sidled up to each other for thirty minutes straight. Possibly, all night.

           Bucky asked, “Now that we’ve been like this for a while, can I say something?”

           “Go for it, Barnes.”

           “I’m surprised you haven’t felt my boner yet.”

           “JAMES BUCHANAN BARNES!” You screamed, and scrambled away from him. He threw his head back and began laughing so hard, that he didn’t even realize your hair was freed. You forgot all about what he said, and leaped off the bed, raising your arms in victory. “I’m free!”

           Steve came walking back in with a pair of scissors in his hand and stopped when he saw you standing in the middle of the room, and Bucky about pissing himself in laughter on the bed.

           You pointed at the scissors in his grasp and asked, “You were literally going to cut my hair?”


a slow burn ship/plot of two best friends (a “straight” one and a gay one omg) where the gay one is just really casual/nonchalant and flirts with his straight friend bc that’s just who he is and the straight friend is fine with it (bc i am NOT HERE for those homophobic types who can’t even let their friend joke around with them like jfc) and like… just eventually they get really drunk/high/etc one night and things end up happening and it’s kind of just like? a snowball effect of the straight one questioning about if he’s actually straight and then it leads to just… a cute relationship where it’s just like “we’re dating now but like before anything you’re my best friend. we might break up, or fight, or whatever, but you will always be my best friend” and just CUTE SHIPPY SHIT FAM with only a little smut thrown in (okay maybe occasionally a lot, i just want this to be more about their relationship than their sex k fam)