this is special and personal only for me

It’s 5:48 am and I can’t sleep. My head does feel heavy and my eyes are tired of the light that my laptop is giving me. I felt sad when I found out that I wasn’t the only one, all the sweet and raw talk we had meant nothing to you. But it meant to me. I thought your little texts were about me. But they weren’t. My head feels heavier now. I know you weren’t looking for anything serious but I think I’ve might fallen for you. I thought that maybe, just maybe, you were my special person! But you weren’t. It’s 6 am now and you messaged me three times a few days ago and suddenly you stopped. You asked if I was mad at you. I ignored you. I’m still ignoring you now. Ignore. Ignore. Ignore. I don’t miss talking with you anymore. I’m not hurt anymore. You weren’t my special person. And that’s fine - it’s actually more than fine! It’s amazing! It means someone better will come for me. It means that I can better myself. I can love myself. I can enjoy myself. And once my person comes I can be better with him, I can love him more than I thought I could love anyone and I can enjoy my life with him. I’m waiting for you, love. Please hurry up. I want to love you.
It’s 6:58 now and I don’t even remember your name. I think you never existed… maybe in my mind. Yes, in my mind.
—  in my mind I saw you but it felt real. I’m waiting for my lover. I’m waiting.

anonymous asked:

Hi! Can you name some real life situations you save your emotions for? Love your blog ~fellow intp

Thank you!

Well, I tend to get emotional when it comes to my closest personal relationships. I’d say that my relationship to my dad has always been very emotional, ever since I was quite young. I’m the only girl in my family (although I have a lot of brothers), so I think my dad and I have a special relationship because of this. He definitely has a soft spot for me (which I do my best NOT to take advantage of), and disappointing him in any way always brings on an onslaught of tears and self-degradation on my part. I’d say that’s the biggest emotional “trigger,” so to speak, for me.

In fact, this is the only “soft spot” I can think of off the top of my head. Otherwise, I’m known as a prickly hedgehog and an ice lady to those around me. Even my dad sometimes gets on my case because I’m so emotionally reserved. I can be emotional in private, when it comes to certain friendships (most of my rather small circle of personal friends lives out-of-state, which is difficult at times). Hearing from them can make me ridiculously happy. I even cried once when one of them contacted me (we hadn’t chatted for a while). So, yeah.

But I’d say that in general I’m at the very stoic side of the feelings spectrum. 

  • someone: i cant believe after all these years and games Altair is still ur favorite assassin, whats so special about him anyway
  • me internally: Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad from Assassin's Creed™ (2007) was actually a unique character not only because not white (in a time period, the Crusades, that has been novelized from a purely white/western point of view over and over again) but also for the particular treatment of his personality and development. There was absolutely 0 effort in trying to make him likeable or even understandable, he is basically a huge asshole at first and even after the dramatic change his character goes through, he remains a deeply flawed, aloof, unapproachable man. Which I think is actually a refreshing concept - a character that is allowed to exist on his unlikeable own, instead of trying so very hard to appeal to the mass of gamers as it's often done by the majority of developers, ubisoft usually leading the way on this. And yet he's also very far from the icy, unchanging piece of granite that many thought he was at the time (probably because they payed little attention to the dialogues). During only the course of the first game he undergoes a change which remains among the most impressive in the entire series to this day. In fact, other Assassins have much more time and cutscenes dedicated to them and they change very little in comparison. The fact that Altair goes from the selfish, arrogant piece of shit he is in in the first part of the game to someone apologizing and trying to make amends for his mistakes in the second part, reveals he is more reasonable and reflective than everyone (maybe even himself) thought he was at first. His path is built on questions: those he asks to his victims before they die, and those he starts asking himself, about the real meaning of the Creed and its contradictions. This path begins in the first Assassin's Creed game, but it continues, partially behind the scenes, until his death. And if the development of his character is already remarkable in that game, what comes next is even more impressive. Altair's codex is probably the most interesting document in the entire series and it reveals a life dedicated but to the study of the Apple and to the Order, its refinement, its phylosophy, and the possible solutions to its ancient problems. The fact that in the second part of his life he suffered from deep depression due to his losses - his son, his wife, his best friend - and the many troubles of the Order in an age of great changes, only adds a new layer of interest and sympathy for me personally. Being chronically depressed myself, I cherish every positive representation of depressed characters that still try, still fight, and can even save the day every now and then. I think many of the reasons why I like Altair so much were not even accurately planned ahead by his creators and they are actually the result of coincidences, different teams and different necessities from one game to the other; but nonetheless I still love the character that emerged in the end, I love that he is capable and talented and still fail hard; that he makes huge mistakes and apologizes and tries to do better; that he doesn't just run around killing people, but he also sits down and thinks about what he's doing and why he is doing it; I love that he doubts and falters, even on the Creed that dictated his whole life. While there are many other interesting and more easily likeable characters in the series, Altair is still the n.1 on my personal podium because there's a depth, a complexity and a subtlety to the character that, in my opinion, is still unsurpassed to this day.
  • me externally: he's my piece of trash I personally took him out of the dumpster with my own two bare hands ten years ago and I'm keeping him
Sometimes I feel so small and insignificant, like I have no place or purpose on this giant spinning ball. I feel as though I am one pixel out of billions on some large screen I cannot see and that if I were to flicker out, no one would notice and the image would continue to look just the same. But then I see the way you look at me – as though I am somebody special. Like the only thing you see on that whole screen is me and in that moment I know that I am important to you. I may not understand my tiny place in the bigger picture…. but I know when I look into your eyes that I am an irreplaceable part of it. I know without question that I am loved and that if I were to flicker out of existence, one persons view of it would be irreversibly altered forever.
You are my reason to keep shining.
  • Aries: For love, I'd do anything. For you, I'd do more.
  • Taurus: Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was my choice, and falling in love with you was beyond my control.
  • Gemini: Because of you, I can feel myself becoming the person that I've always dreamed of being.
  • Cancer: Everyone says you only fall in love once, but that's not true because every time I see you I fall in love all over again.
  • Leo: Words fall short whenever I want to tell you how special you are to me, so all I can say is my world is full of smiles whenever I think of you.
  • Virgo: When I saw you, I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew.
  • Libra: You give me the kind of feeling that people write novels about.
  • Scorpio: Sometimes you meet somebody and you know that whatever you did before must have been right. Nothing you've done could be too bad because it lead you to this person.
  • Sagittarius: Anyone can catch your eye, but it takes someone special to catch your heart.
  • Capricorn: People say that when you're in love nothing in the world matters, but that's not true. When you love someone everything in the world matters more.
  • Aquarius: If I had to have feelings for anyone in the world, I'd have them for you.
  • Pisces: You know you're in love when you can't sleep because reality is better than your dreams.

Friendship grows in special ways, but when a man and a beast bond, they can be inseparable. Even for life.

I finished The Last Guardian a while ago, as well as watched Jacks play through, and man! What a BEAUTIFUL game it has been! And in a recent poll I wanted to stream, and @therealjacksepticeye​ himself told me to do: “Whatever your heart leans more towards :)”

My heart was leaning toward Trico! And to follow my personal goal to draw you, Jack, in every long play though / games I personally like that you’ve played!

The Tests In Origins

So I don’t know if anyone noticed this about the tests, but after watching Origins after the Christmas Special, I realized there was a bit more depth to them than I first thought.

It’s an old fairy tale cliche. A fairy or a god is in disguise of some poor old soul and they see if someone deserves a reward or punishment depending how they treat the old soul. This is what Master Fu does with both Marinette and Adrien.

But something always stuck out as odd to me. While Marinette’s test had a lot of possible candidates, Adrien only had three other people besides himself and more than that, there was no danger of a car in his. But after seeing the Christmas special, I see what the tests ACTUALLY were.

There is that whole making sure the person is nice enough to help someone in need, but there’s also the details of it.

In Marinette’s scenario, the car makes a time crunch. But there’s also the crowd. Everyone is on their phone, distracted, not paying attention. The test isn’t to see if someone is just kind. It’s seeing if someone Will Notice and Act. Because that’s what’s necessary for Lucky Charm. To take in your surroundings, notice what you need, make a plan, and act on that plan. The test is not just kindness, but a test on how well she would be able to use the powers. 

Then there’s Adrien’s test. The test is actually directly made for Adrien, none of the other three are candidates. Why? Because Adrien’s scenario is harder to find and this is why I realized it after the Christmas special. Adrien’s power is that of destruction. This is a terrifying power in the wrong hands. This takes a very particular personality.

Master Fu doesn’t fall when Adrien is running to school. He falls when Adrien is about to get into school. When it would be harder for Nathalie and Gorilla to grab him without causing a scene, he could be inside before they have a good grasp on him.

Fu falls then because Adrien is given the choice. Does Adrien go for what he wants, or does he go to help even if it means losing what he wants? Adrien does the latter, and now he has to get through Nathalie and the Gorilla to get to the school. Less of a scene, and he’s lost his chance. But he doesn’t show any bitterness to Fu for it.

Adrien’s test was not just that of kindness, but if given the choice between being selfish, or being selfless to the point of hurting himself, he’s going to chose the latter. It’s a test to make sure if the hero of destruction ever breaks, instead of destroying the world, he’d destroy himself first.

The scene that always intrigues me: WHY IS ZORO THE ONLY ONE OUT OF THE CREW MUNCHING ON SANJI’S BREADSTICKS??? Does he love breadsticks so much that he sneaked into the kitchen to get his hands on them before anyone else (even before Luffy and that’s saying something!), or could it be that Sanji chose no one other than the shitty marimo as the first person to taste his special snack? It’s really interesting to imagine either way… what’s for certain is that Zoro sure is enjoying his breadsticks XD

Another scene I adore: even after arguing with Sanji a moment ago, Zoro is munching on his special recipe like nothing ever happened between them XD Sanji didn’t leave the marimo out when handing out snacks (okay maybe he did swear a little like the tsun-tsun he is XD), and Zoro must’ve shamelessly accepted the cook’s favor? Where did your pride go Zoro! Well I guess you like Sanji’s cooking that much even if you never say a word about it :DDDDD


Hi guys! I’m Anicia and as you probably know i’m a fan of Supernatural. This show is the only one reason why i started drawing. And now i’m opening commissions.

Castiel, Misha, Destiel have a special place in my heart. I’ll draw any pairings (nsfw? no, sorry) and not only spn characters.  For a payment i use PayPal.

  • arts: 2 persons (like pictures #1 and #2) - 80 $ - 100 $; 
  • arts: 1 person + background (like #3) or without background - 80$ - 70$ respectively; 
  • portraits (like #4) - 60 $; 
  • sketch (like #5 and #6) - 30 $; 

If you’re interested or have any questions please contact me (my email or my ask box is open)

guys as much as i love zimbits and how totally whipped jack is for bitty, you gotta remember how important shitty is to jack, too

  • shitty has always been there. i see these posts all like “bitty is the only person jack can be himself around” and i just?? no?? 
  • jack and shitty met just a year after jack’s overdose. at that point in time, jack had no one. his parents loved him but there was still so much pressure. kent and him weren’t speaking. and now here he is, in this brand new place, knowing absolutely no one 
  • being mentally ill and alone is not a good combination, either. it’s easy to get lost in your head, to go right back to harmful behaviors or even to start new ones 
  • but then shitty came along. shitty, who was loud and funny and who everyone loved. who didn’t give two shits about what others had to say. who was as outwardly passionate as jack felt inside 
  • and i don’t know how they became friends exactly, but I bet they just gravitated towards each other naturally (or, more accurately, jack followed shitty around until he took pity on the guy and asked if he wanted to hang out sometime) 
  • jack isn’t good at making friends. he’s quiet and awkward and likes watching history documentaries more than going to parties. he’s got his moods, and he’s not exactly the friendliest person. 
  • but shitty doesn’t care. he sees jack for who he really is, sees how hard he’s trying to find his place again. he doesn’t care about his name, doesn’t care about his past or the scars it left.
  • and jack just. he can’t believe this. he can’t believe he’s found someone who is willing to love him, even though he thinks he’s too fucked up for anything like that again. 
  • they grow really, really close. shitty gets weirder, jack opens up more. jack learns to be more friendly with others, but even as he makes friends with the other boys on the team, it’s nothing like what he has with shitty. 
  • because shitty is his best friend. and jack is shitty’s. they’ve seen each other laugh and cry and stoned while being but-ass naked (well, that one is mainly shitty) 
  • they probably have like. so many inside jokes. there will be a pair of broken sunglasses on the counter and they’ll just look at each other and bust up laughing and everyone else is just like. u guys okay.
  • imagine how many bad nights shitty’s helped jack through. how many times he’s been the one to hold him after a game, after the media takes another hit at jack. how shitty will lay with him or offer him a joint or even just ramble on about who knows what until jack can think straight again 
  • and same with jack, too. jack’s probably indulged shitty and spooned with him when he cries about his family. told him it doesn’t matter, they’re obviously shit if they can’t treat shitty right. lets shitty yell and punch and just lose it when it gets to be too much. 
  • and oh god the platonic flirting!! jack probably has such bad body image from growing up as a not-very-pretty chubby kid with actual model parents
  • and shitty just totally annihilates any bad feelings, loudly claiming things like “jack zimmermann’s cheek bones could cut glass. seriously. i had to get 4 stitches last time i touched his face.” and jack never says it but he loves it so much okay 
  • and don’t even think for ONE second keeping his relationship with bitty from shitty isn’t killing jack inside. I bet he’s the first person they tell. Because Shitty is Jack’s better half, the person who’s been there for him through everything, and the fact that he can’t share this new wonderful thing with him is torture. 

tldr; platonic relationships are consistently overlooked and undervalued and shitty and jack have been in love long before bitty came along

yoi fanfic rec list - part 2! ♥

heya everybody!! i haven’t made a rec list since the series ended, and hoo boy. there has been *so much* quality fic written since i made the first rec list. before i delve into some of my all time fave fics, please check out these other rec lists!!

for reference, all of the fics listed feature victor/yuuri as a pair, but there may be other relationships on the side. my lists are organized by word count, and only include completed work. no overlap with linked lists!

✮wtk, part 1
@dubiouspasta - link
@viktcrnikiforov - link
@thefourteenthdarkone - link

((special shout outs and thanks to @ingthing, who kills me slowly with fics, fic recs, and art, @narootos, who is one of the best and sweetest artists ive ever spoken to, @macaroonsie, another absolutely adorable person, @capshere, who helps me get my frickin life together, and @corpsentry, another fantastic artist and writer. check them all out!!))

happy reading, and happy 2017! ♥

Keep reading

We’re all seeking that special person who is right for us. But if you’ve been through enough relationships, you begin to suspect there’s no right person, just different flavors of wrong. Why is this? Because you yourself are wrong in some way, and you seek out partners who are wrong in some complementary way. But it takes a lot of living to grow fully into your own wrongness. And it isn’t until you finally run up against your deepest demons, your unsolvable problems—the ones that make you truly who you are—that we’re ready to find a lifelong mate. Only then do you finally know what you’re looking for. You’re looking for the wrong person. But not just any wrong person: it’s got to be the right wrong person—someone you lovingly gaze upon and think, “This is the problem I want to have.”

I will find that special person who is wrong for me in just the right way.

—  Andrew Boyd, Daily Afflictions: The Agony of Being Connected to Everything in the Universe
I cannot speak for anyone else because I don’t know what’s in their heart, I can only say what is in my own… and it is love; Love for the people who are in my life, love for the people who’ve left it and even love for those who’ve hurt me in unspeakable ways. People who, by rights I should probably hate – but I don’t… I can’t… because I’m not that kind of person.
The people I’ve never loved, I simply don’t love… I don’t hate them… I may even like them… but love for me is a rare and special kind of bond that lasts a lifetime whether you’re in my life or not.
There are moments I feel like the love is gone, but really it’s just transformed into another kind of love… it’s still there, it’s just taken on a new form. There is no-one I have ever loved who I would not smile for on their happiest day or cry with if I saw them crying… it would not matter if we were lovers who broke up, friends who parted ways or family I distanced myself from for my own sanity… If I’ve ever loved you – then I still do.
I will always love you… I will always care.
I have given you a piece of my soul… how could I not?

Sakura: I have been researching and studying hard because I really want to contribute in the fight with Sasuke-kun, Kakashi-sensei, but it seems impossible for us to catch up.
Kakashi: We need to super-accelerate our growth.
Sakura: Okay, how?
Kakashi: What I meant by “we” and “our” is that I’m going to be training just Naruto.
Narrative: *shows Naruto being trained by Kakashi AND Yamato AND getting a special session with Asuma as well*
Narrative: *Tsunade, the only person who gives a fuck about Sakura learning anything apparently, is busy with Hokage crises*
Narrative: *briefly cuts to Sakura sitting on her bed, alone, looking at a photograph of Team 7 and crying*

Fandom: lol Sakura is weak and doesn’t contribute lol Sakura is always crying lol Kakashi and Naruto always have to save Sakura
Me: *table flip* GEE I WONDER WHY

(in a future episode of “fineillsignup rereads Naruto”, when Kakashi does his “I’m sorry for being a terrible teacher” speech)

yes i reused the #headerfordan i made last month FITE ME

I finally hit 3k! Thanks to everyone who welcomed me back to this damned website after two years of absence. I still don’t know what I’ve gotten myself into though. Here’s to what’s to come!

special mention to @ravehowell ; jade! im glad we became friends the one and only person in my gc aside from our love for Phil Lester. let’s discuss more stuff about social science and maybe analyze dnp in those frameworks as well. ILYSM!

Now for all my D&P/Youtuber mutuals(?) i luv u all (apologies if i missed you??? just message me omg but ily still !!!)

If I don’t follow you then i still love you dw mwah.

Keep reading

Valentines Day: Romantic Comedies

By Teilani (enfjs-r-us), ENFJ Mod.

Does any one remember that dog and his bone story from when we were kids? Years later and I realized the concept kinda stuck with me. Below is a list of a few movies with the common theme of realizing that special someone right under your nose (figuratively speaking).

You’ve Got Mail: ESTJ with ISFJ. What if you got to know a person, the way they really were, not projecting what you wanted others to see, but the real you instead? Kathleen and Joe couldn’t stand each other in real life, but online, fell in love with each others thoughts and company — separate from any personal details.

Clueless: ESFJ with INFP (I think). Consistent with the theme. Cher finally realizes she’s “butt-crazy” in love with Josh, but it takes one of her friends crushing on him to realize the source of her jealousy. How would you act, once you had such a far out realization? I love how awkward this realization made reigning socialite Cher act around Josh.

Only You: ENFP with INFP. Faith is set on finding her soul mate. The guy belonging to the name she got off a Ouija board when she was twelve. She finds him. But, what happens when Faith realizes he lied about his name? How far would you go to make destiny happen.

Laws of Attraction: ISTJ with INFJ. What if you realized you were actually in love with the person you accidentally married at an Irish festival? Might work. Two divorce lawyers get married while investigating opposing sides of the same divorce case. One believes in divorce law, the other doesn’t. I’m glad the ISTJ didn’t win this case.

Merry Valentines Day! :)

Just Breathe [Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader]

Summary: Reader has an anxiety attack and Lin is there to comfort her.

Word Count: 517

Warnings: anxiety tw (?)

A/N: this is a short one, something i needed to hear/read from someone, actually this is a really personal fic that felt necessary for myself. i know many of you also suffer from anxiety and writing this made me feel better, even though it was only for a few minutes; i hope it makes you feel a bit better too. Love y’all, guys.

askbox | masterlist

The air seemed non-existant. The tears started rolling down your face, and you didn’t know why… You weren’t exactly surprised though. You had anxiety since you were a teenager, but it has improved so much, specially since you started dating Lin.

You had a few nights here and there, where the attack would come out of nowhere. Combined with your messed up sleep patterns, anxiety could be a real bitch, but this was the first time it was happening with Lin sleeping right next to you.

Keep reading


Jon, your mom is a very accomplished person. A very, ummm…cool person. Like, you know she spent the last few years writing books? And before you were born, she was known as one of the best reporters in the world. Her work changed lives for the better. And her curiosity, energy, spark and intellect not only made her special, but helped her make you special. It’s part of what has shaped you into the person you are. If mom goes back to work and feels more fulfilled as a person, it doesn’t mean she loves you less. Clark wanted me to do what was best for me. He knows I love Jon and him. He also knows I loved every minute I spent working at The Daily Planet. As far as I’m concerned, it was the best job in the world. It’s a key part of who I am. Action Comics #966

anonymous asked:

You are probably one of the most talented people I've met. You have a great talent for the arts. You have some if the best voice acting channels I've ever seen. You have natural beauty. And you end it off with still being the most generous of people I've ever met or heard of. You really are a special person.

*ahhhhhhhh this is so nice that I honestly don’t know how to respond* cuz you guys are so nice to me too, you support my artwork struggles and my silly ocs and you draw me nice fanart and send me nice messages, so anything I can do I only get to do because you guys spread such positivity to the community