this is so elaborate

it’s been one month without ANY fasting, calorie counting, excessive exercising, etc. and i am finally starting to realize why i so desperately needed to recover. i had forgotten what it was like to be able to think so clearly…. what it was like to think about things other than my weight… what it was like to be able to simply get out of bed w/o an elaborate process so i dont black out. the reason im writing this out is not so i can get anons congratulating me, i dont need that. but i constantly see people saying they wished they starved themselves or were anorexic because it would make them prettier. anorexia made me lose 48 pounds at my lowest. losing weight is a good thing, right? but in the process my body began to lose function, and so did my mind. my life with that disorder was as if i was on a strong drowsiness pill and yet i couldn’t sleep a wink. my thoughts were about nothing but calories, food, calories. it consumed me.
don’t let it consume you please

4

For anyone wondering why Pink Wishes is my favourite set: the descriptions.

🌸 Kimi noticing that Nikki has trouble with stilettos, and designing cute (the cutest) shoes for her
🌸 Kimi taking the time to create more items for Nikki, such as the fluffy cape, because she can’t JUST gift her shoes
🌸 Kimi designing a dress for Nikki to wear on her birthday, so beautiful and elaborate that a skilled team had to work for HOURS to make it
🌸 Kimi forcing said team (*cough* the ENTIRE Apple Apparel Group *cough*) to work AROUND THE CLOCK so that her girlfriend can look pretty in this new dress
🌸 Kimi deciding that a simple dinner will not suffice to show off how pretty Nikki looks in her new dress, and instead begins planning a ‘Grand Celebration’ for her princess at none other than the headquarters of the AFAG

(BONUS 🌸 All the members of the AFAG other than Kimi falling asleep during the party because they’d had to pull so many all nighters. Not that Kimi noticed, as she spent the night proving to Nikki that the heels would remain comfortable, even after hours of dancing)

like damn, if you all hate butch lesbians and detransitioned women that much, just fucking say it! no need to fabricate some elaborate explanation and circulate it around the internet so everyone thinks we’re ~dangerous~ or whatever

7

anyway so do y’all ever think about how Yusei, who is incredibly hot af, literally has the hottest group of friends-practically-brothers and do y’all think Yusei ever thinks his friends are hot b/c I sure as hell do

like damn if looks could kill in YGO instead of card games. 

honestly there were five million shots of the three of them together in 5D’s b/c 5D’s wanted to drive home the point that they’re attractive af and there’s no way you can convince me otherwise

(I am legit sweating from the hotness of this photoset y’all)

Okay so: when Peter was 14, he made his spider-outfit big and baggy so he could wear it with just a sports bra under it so he wouldn’t be exercising with a binder on.  When he got Tony’s first spider-suit, he went ahead and wore a binder under it because by that time he’d figured out that super-strength (and super-healing) kept his lungs and ribs safe.

When Tony found out that he was wearing a binder under his suit, he freaked out and told Peter that just because you have superpowers doesn’t mean you can suffocate yourself all day.  Peter refused to stop Spider-Manning in his binder, and Tony finally said “okay, what about surgery then?”  Peter hadn’t even thought of that as a possibility because of lack of money and being a minor, but Tony insisted that it was an investment in the protection of the city and found a surgeon who would work with permission from a guardian plus letters from psychiatrists.

When Peter was almost 15, Tony talked the surgeon into working with Bruce to find ways to operate successfully on someone with super-healing and talked the surgeon into operating with Peter’s mask on.  (Convincing him to accept guardian’s permission and letters without Peter’s name on them was actually the hard part; the surgeon was very excited to work on someone with superpowers.)

For Peter, the worst part was the period he wasn’t able to go out as Spider-Man.  They had to temporarily slow down his super-healing in order to operate, so for the first two weeks he healed only a bit faster than a standard human, and his arms wouldn’t move properly and his chest hurt and there was no way Tony was letting him go swing around the city and tear open his stitches, especially when his healing factor was offline.

When Peter was 15, his super-healing had fully taken care of his incisions, like they were never there, and he only had the occasional twinge - apparently healing factors don’t entirely eliminate the effects of nerve damage.

When Peter was 15, he went swimming for the first time since he was 7.

When Peter was 15, he could breathe.

there’s something to be said for nights in. nights with friends and siblings and lovers spent wrapped up in blankets, on balconies, in bedrooms, on sofas… putting the world on pause for those you care about. but there’s also something to be said for nights out. nights with those very same people in streets, parking lots, crowded cars, music turned high or playing low… where the world is in motion all around you.

The Problem With Cringe Culture

From what I’ve seen, the phenomenon dubbed Cringe Culture is a paragon of insecurity, internalized misogyny, and self-loathing.

Let me elaborate a little here:  here on Tumblr (and in life in general, honestly), a lot of folks are very pre-occupied with what is or isn’t Cringey.  It’s a dynamic somewhat reminiscent of an eighth grade schoolyard, but that’s really not the issue here.  

What Tumblr folks dub Cringey are typically things that are enjoyed by young teens (in particular, young girls) exploring fandom and fan creativity for the first time.

Yes, these teens are frequently obnoxious, overzealous, and loud, but it’s an exciting time for kids:  we as adults may have comfortably settled into our interests, but for them it’s an avenue of unsupervised self-expression they may not have experienced before.  Moreover, they have little to no experience in moderating themselves, which is one of the reasons why I believe the act of mocking them to be a somewhat callous one.  

Are they occasionally annoying?  Subjectively, yes.  I frequently find young teens and tweens annoying, particularly when they’re being loud and obnoxious during my allotted writing time.  But I don’t shame them for it, on here or in real life, because I’m an adult and they are literally children .  

And most importantly, so are the people mocking them.

I’ll elaborate once again:  I’m nineteen.  Most of my friends, both on here and on my other blog, are fellow chill late teens and twenty-somethings.  And I’ve never seen any adult who’s secure in their own self-image do anything other than Do Their Own Thing and allow everyone else do the same.

In other words, I’ve been involved in fandom for a few years now, and almost everyone I’ve seen actively participating in cringe culture has turned out to be no older than seventeen or so themselves, and probably (consciously or otherwise) attempting to distance themselves from their “embarrassing” younger alter egos and feel more confident in their purported maturity. 

Because they probably did some Cringey things when they were fourteen, too:  maybe they drew manga OCs on DeviantArt with needlessly elaborate hair, ran a passionate SuperWhoLock blog, read Homestuck, wrote angsty poetry about turning into wolves, et cetera.  

Of course, the whole point here is that there is literally nothing wrong with any of these things:  they’re harmless examples of children exploring revenues of creativity for the first time, that we’ve been conditioned to find embarrassing.  

Now, I’m not going to pretend I didn’t have this phase myself:  I once got into an impassioned argument on Facebook with a bunch of One Direction fans when I was sixteen or so, in which I dismissed their obsession as being Stupid and Juvenile and proclaimed my favored Heavy Metal as being far superior.  

Now, I’m still not into One Direction in the slightest, but if I could go back in time I would probably smack my sixteen-year-old self upside the head and tell her to leave people alone and let them do their own thing.

Of course, a large part of my reasoning was also driven at the time by my unfortunate Not Like Other Girls phase, in which I wanted to distance myself from the silliness of my fellow teen girls as much as possible.  I may or may not have still been in my “I hate pink” phase, which I still shudder to think about to this day.

Which brings me to another one of Cringe Culture’s more problematic aspects:  it’s inherently a little misogynist, in that almost everyone who partakes in it is attempting to distance themselves from the interests of teenage girls.

Shows like Doctor Who, Steven Universe, Voltron, Supernatural, Yuri on Ice, and many others all have passionate and predominantly young female fanbases, and as such, people seem unwittingly inclined to see them as inherently vapid, annoying, or Cringey in a way that equally vocal male-dominated fandoms simply aren’t.  

Even being a Trekkie (Star Trek fan) was considered embarrassing when the fandom was predominantly female populated, although the means by which fanfiction and discourse was exchanged was via fan-run zines rather than Tumblr blogs.  Now that men are in on it, it’s considered one of the best fandoms there is.

More male populated fandoms such as Game of Thrones, the Walking Dead, the DC and Marvel cinematic universes, and Star Wars are just as impassioned, and have had just as many ideological issues in the past.  Yet are these things ever denigrated as being Cringy or annoying?  Not that I can recall.

Another one of my greatest issues with Cringe Culture is that it discourages passion:  I have never encountered a fandom, Cringey or otherwise, that hasn’t produced genuinely stunning works of art and fiction.  Moreover, I’ve never encountered a fandom that doesn’t have fans who have cited it as what saved them from depression or even suicide.  

So if someone’s passionate about something, even if it’s something of no value to you, it costs absolutely zero dollars to mind your own goddamn business and not taint their joy with your own insecurity, cynicism, and internalized self-loathing.  

Similarly, I can speak from experience when I say my interests and fandoms got me through the very worst period of my adolescence, and I’d be a significantly less happy person if I didn’t have still have them to fall back on.  Not everyone’s sole source of enjoyment and comfort in life comes from nihilistic memes.

So if you want to take a step towards fostering a more creative generation, take a step away from Cringe Culture.  Respect other people’s interests, and openly and unabashedly enjoy your own.  Question why you think certain interests are Cringey, and try to distance yourself from the mentality that you’re a better or cooler person for being less similar to young women.

And finally, try and forgive your fourteen-year-old self for whatever cringiness they may have been culpable of, and tell them that you love them anyway.

Honestly, whenever you don’t feel good, or stressed out, just go take a nap. Grades stressing you out? Take a nap. Bad social situation?? Take a nap. Bad vibes trying to punch you in the gut??? Swerve. Take a nap. Just ten minutes usually helps. If you still don’t feel super fantastic, you can sleep a while longer. Don’t procrastinate, but your mental health is more important than whatever is trying to get you down.

Describe your OC’s eyes without using color or shape terms. Are they bright, contemplative, wise, intense, empty, etc.?

“I’m serious, Yu. You don’t realize how terrifying humans are.”

bailci  asked:

I can't think of headcanons myself, but how would their first kiss go? :D

*digs hands into cliche solangelo headcanon box*

@bailci asked for headcanons and instead i delievered a fanfiction in bullet point omfg im so sorry

  • fight me all you want on this, but their relationship for sure started with a ‘first kiss’ because they’re cheesy like that
  • so lets give a bit of background shall we ??
  • i like to think that they really became friends—actual friends–after those three days in the infirmary and they obviously had *those* moments
  • you know what im talking about.
  • like when things got a bit too quiet during their walks and both had the urge to just reach out and hold the others hand
  • or when they one of them were caught by the other stealing glances here and there during meetings because literally who cares about what chiron’s saying when there’s a cute boy in the room
  • but besides those little moments, i’d say they were pretty comfortable with each other
  • nico would voluntarily hang out with will at the infirmary and “help him out” and “bring him a snack”
  • anyway let me actually answer this before i go on rambling about their cute friendship days:
  • maybe things got pretty bad one night. i’d presume nico had some really bad nightmares and he woke up and took a walk to clear his mind
  • and maybe he just happened to walk over to the path that lead him to the apollo cabin—half because he hated the dark and half because the glowing warmth of the cabin gave him comfort and solace
  • and of course, will would just be leaning there, maybe trying to get his own thoughts out of his head and when he saw nico, he’d just smile and gesture him to come closer.
  • they’d take a walk together around camp, just talking about normal things until will asked him what he was doing up and walking around at twelve in the morning
  • “you’re literally the child of the sun solace the better question is what are you doing at twelve in the morning”
  • will would probably just shrug and say how he was just couldn’t sleep cause he was thinking about his brothers
  • and then—uh oh—it’s awkward and quiet suddenly and will doesn’t knows why until nico starts talking about how he was thinking of bianca and oh
  • and because will solace is a Literal Sunshine he’d probably just ask him to elaborate and talk about his sister and his time at italy and all of a sudden nico is flailing his arms and his eyes are sparkling and will is biting his lip to stop himself from smiling too much
  • eventually the conversation fades away comfortably, maybe laughing at something nico said, but either way the silence that follows after is finally a comfortable one
  • nico breaks it by looking over at will with the calmest expression will has ever seen and he thanks him—for listening, for being there, for letting him rant on and [insert bumbling flustered nico here]
  • “he’s really cute but oh god he won’t shut up and i’m pretty sure he doesn’t even know what’s he’s saying anymore”
  • so will decides to shut him up and calm him down by leaning in closer and pressing his lips against nico’s in a chaste, gentle way. his lips are warm—they’re unbelievably smooth and the happy warmth bubbling inside his chest is a bit too much and for a second will doesn’t realize that nico’s become tense against him
  • and just as he’s about to pull back, nico relaxes slowly and presses closer in a super nervous and unsure type of way because he’s 14 okay and he can’t even handle will smiling at him and you’re talking kissing
  • will feels a rush of happiness and he puts his hand on top of nico’s trembling one (he also learns that kissing, contrary to popular belief, does not calm people down)
  • and they part, not because they want to, but because breathing is a thing and they kind of forgot how to do that in the last few seconds.
  • now all of a sudden they’re looking at each other with wide eyes that dart to the other’s lips awkwardly and faces that are too red to be healthy and they just start laughing because their shocked and also nervous but most of all happy and “oh my god did we just…”
  • they spend the rest of the night unable to sleep but because of a good reason this time: just thinking about how the others lips felt and each little sensation and smiling into their pillows and oh my god is that the sun?

give me headcanons (or risk asking me for some and opening a black hole)

So I was just thinking about those posts you get in the Discworld tag about the way belief works on the Disc and how Vetinari and/or Vimes is so integral to the way Ankh-Morpork works that they might just sort of… not ever die.

You know, the ones like ‘Vimes is going to become a god of policemen and he’s going to hate it”.

Well. What if it happens to both of them? There are two parts to the city, after all. ‘Proud Ankh’ needs taking down a peg or two (or seven) by Sam Vimes, and if anyone can terrify ‘pestilent Morpork’ into being better then it’s Havelock Vetinari. And they can drive each other mad with stealth puns for centuries, if they want.

Also, this would potentially make them literally Law And Order, and that just seems very fitting in a way that would probably annoy them both.

Maybe the reason it hurt so bad,

Isn’t because they didn’t return your feelings to the same degree, and it isn’t because you saw this elaborate future,

The reason it hurt so bad is because they made you think they really liked you, and then when push came to shove they just left like it was nothing.

—  Excerpt from a book I’ll never write