this is so bad don't read it

I’ve been trying to learn German for so long and I really want to practice and get better but I’m still terrible so the idea of asking someone to, like, talk with me to help me practice just seems like a terrible idea.

Trying to get Jumin's bad end 2

Me: *at first feel guilty being a shameless selfish MC*

Me: *keeps choosing the insane choices but somehow keep getting +HEARTS from Jumin*

Me: ???

Me: *keeps getting plus points as Jumin actually LOVES the creepy choices*

Me: o_o

Me:

Me:

Me:

Me: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Me: *got bad end 2 with a special CG*

Me: i’ve abandoned my humanity and i shall embrace the eternal darkness

5

DON’T LOOK AT ME PLS OMG
it gets a bit confusing to me coz i have a male oc that looks like how i draw zarya orz I FORGOT ZARYA’S TATTOOS IM SORRY

Me: *reads a decent YOI review*

Reviewer: *accuses YOI of cheap fanservice and disgusting queer-baiting*

Me: *has read a bad YOI review*

Noodle: “You know, I just finished reading Tank Girl, and I think–”
Murdoc: “Noodle, wait. Think very carefully about what you’re about to say.”
Russel: “Yeah, baby… You don’t want to say anything you might regret…”
Noodle: “Oh, stop being weird, you guys! It’s just an opinion.”
2D: “Noods, don’t do th–”
Noodle: “It was rubbish. I didn’t get it at all and the art was wonky as tits. Why did she fuck a kangaroo? How did she have a child with that kangaroo? Why–”
*the boys all shriek in horror as a giant celestial pencil crashes down through their roof and starts erasing her from existence as she screams in agony*

4

I… really like Overlord… it’s such a good show it’s all I’ve ever wanted out of an anime… I love all of the characters and it’s hard for me to pick a favorite (besides Ainz ofc) but here are some I like a lot!!

You may not like the course of this storyline, but don’t think just because you are fan, emmerdale will ‘obey’ the fans. They plan this sorts of storylines months ahead and they won’t change it just because you don’t like it.

Besides, we can’t complain that much because we got two episodes about their wedding. Most of the soap couples don’t get that.

So, please be nice and don’t be rude. All they do is for us: to entertain the fans.

Imagine Scorpius discovering Muggle plays, and getting obsessed with Shakespeare. 

*

 Albus: Are you reading that stupid play again? 

Scorpius: *clutching his heart in a dramatic way* It’s romantic, Albus. 

Albus: She just stabbed herself because he’s dead… Would you stab yourself if I died? 

Scorpius: …No offence but maybe not. I’d try to pay tribute to your memory or something. 

Albus: *tuts* But how do I know you truly love me if you wouldn’t kill yourself at my tragic demise? 

Scorpius: *hits him in the face with a pillow* If you’re not going to be nice you should leave me alone with my cultured literature and go and do your Transfiguration homework. 

 Albus: *snorts as he leaves Scorpius to it* Cultured literature. 

Scorpius: *throws the pillow at the back of his head*

8

shh don’t tell anyone she’s reading on the job when she should be learning the dewey decimal system 

i don’t think anything makes me angrier than the feeling of being talked down to. like if i even vaguely feel like someone thinks i’m stupid i get really really defensive and i can’t control myself (it SUCKS)

When galaxies collide

AN: I wrote this some time ago and felt like sharing it because it’s not too bad. While reading, please keep in mind that English isn’t my first language, so  excuse any possible mistakes.

Baz

The way he looks at me is irritating.

His eyes never seem to leave me. They’re following me through the room, a solid blue wall. Blue as crayons. They’re extraordinarily ordinary.

I try not to let him notice how he unnerves me. I try to ignore him and his stupidly blue eyes. His tawny skin and his unruly curls. Everything about him is golden and so bright that it looks like he belongs in space. Somewhere far away. Definitely not here.


Simon

This boy looks like he belongs to another planet. His skin is an indescribable mixture of reds and browns and it shimmers like pixie dust. His hair is dark and way longer than mine and it falls over his shoulders, framing his face, making it look at least a bit softer. Because his cheekbones are sharp and his eyes are hard and he scowls all the time.

He should make me feel uncomfortable. I should be scared by him.

But I’m not.

He seems to be drawing me in. I can’t stop watching him, how he moves around. He talks to no one and no one talks to him. Does he feel alone? It seems like there are galaxies between me and him.


Baz

I finally know where he belongs. He’s the sun that is missing in the galaxy I call my life. He completes my very own sun-system. He still hasn’t stopped looking at me.

And when I hear people slowly leaving the room, I decide that I should be brave once in my life.


I turn and look at him. Right into his ridiculously blue eyes.

My breath catches and for a moment, he is all that I can see. He’s the centre of my everything. He’s every nice thing I can think of.

But then he looks away and the moment is broken.


Simon

His grey eyes seem to have unsettled something deep inside of me. Something I was afraid do wake, something I never wanted to think about. He’s still holding my gaze and it hurts, looking at his face hurts. It makes me think of how much I want to talk to him, screw his intimidating looks.

So I break the eye-contact.

Then I stand up.

And start to make my way towards him.


Baz

Within seconds he’s in front of me, making my stomach turn. I can’t name the look on his face. Is he angry because I stared at him? Shouldn’t I be the one who’s angry?

But then he interrupts my thoughts by saying: “You don’t talk to anyone.”

It surprises me. It’s not even a question, it’s a simple statement. What am I supposed to answer to this? I don’t want to scare him away, he’s even more beautiful up close.

“That’s none of your fucking business.”

Oh great.


Simon

He spits out a rude answer, but I can’t really blame him, since my question was probably the least eloquent thing I could have said.

“Well,” I stutter, trying to regain my composure. “I just wanted to ask if I could sit with you.”

There’s a flicker of something in his eyes and I hope that he’ll say yes.


Baz

This boy is going to be the death of me. Now that he’s standing right in front of me, I can see that his face is sprinkled with tiny freckles. There’s an edge of one of his teeth missing, which makes him look way younger. He’s making me feel sick. But the good kind.

He asked if he could sit with me and if I weren’t so absolutely incompatible with human beings, I would have said yes by now. But I still haven’t answered his question and he’s still looking up at me with his blue eyes, chewing on his plump bottom lip.

Before I can think to much about this, I feel my mouth opening.


Simon

“If you insist,” he mumbles and for a moment, I’m worried that he’s irritated by me and is just surrendering because he wants me to stop talking. But then he shoots me a half-smile and it feels like gravity has lost its hold on me.

I smile back at him, already planning to tell Penny all of this as soon as I enter our flat. Although he seemed so far away at first, almost like he lived on another planet, I can’t feel the galaxies dividing us any more. Now we’re circling around each other. As if he’s as focused on me as I am on him.

But then he frowns.


Baz

He beams at me and I can’t help but try to memorize all of his expression, in case I’m not seeing it again. Or at least, not directed at me.

We’re both silent for a moment, standing in the middle of the empty room and staring at each other. Then I remember that I don’t even know his name.

His face falls when I stop smiling and I immediately want to comfort him, tell him that I didn’t change my mind, that I’m just thinking, but I’m not exactly known to be empathic in public.

“What’s your name?”, I ask, cringing internally at how emotionless my voice sounds.

He relaxes, ruffling his curls as his smile returns.

“Simon. Simon Snow.”

Oh well, at least we both have ridiculous names.


Simon

He grins when he hears my name, and I immediately feel self-conscious. My name is one of the things I will never not be embarrassed about.

I have already opened my mouth to say something when he cuts me off.

“Don’t worry, I’m not making fun of you. Would be a bit hypocritical if you consider that my name is Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch. You can call me Baz though.”

I snort, feeling relieved. His name is as extraordinary as he is and even though there’s no way I’m going to remember all of it, I still like it. It sort of fits him.


Baz

My stomach does a somersault when Simon says, “We match, I guess.”.

We do not match, we absolutely don’t. But that doesn’t stop me from trying.

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT

I love Winona Ryder

tragic thought

What if killing stalking ended with Sangwoo getting caught but he blames it all on Yoonbum. Everyone believes him (except officer seungbae) because he’s too “good and handsome” and like Bum gets put on trial and it ends with someone reading out “Yoonbum, 29-30, has Borderline Personality Disorder, charged for the murder of…” in the court.