this is so accurate for me as well

What we really need is an adaptation of the original 1740 The Beauty and the Beast

So were you aware that the The Beauty and the Beast story we all know is a heavily abridged and rewritten version of a much longer novella by Gabrielle-Suzanne Barbot de Villeneuve?  And that a lot of the plot holes existing in the current versions exist because the 1756 rewrite cut out the second half of the novella, which consisted entirely of the elaborate backstory that explains all the weird shit that happened before?  And that the elaborate backstory is presented in a way that’s kind of boring because the novel had only just been invented in 1740 and no one knew how they worked yet, but contains a bazillion awesome ideas that beg for a modern retelling?  And that you are probably not aware that the modern world needs this story like air but the modern world absolutely needs this story like air?  Allow me to explain:

The totally awesome elaborate backstory that explains Beauty and the Beast

  • Once upon a time there was a king, a queen, and their only son
  • But while the prince was still in his infancy, in a neat reversal of how these fairy tales usually go, the king tragically died, leaving his wife to act as Regent until their son reaches maturity
  • Unfortunately, the rulers of all the lands surrounding them go, “Hmm, the kingdom is ruled by a woman now, it must be weak, time for an invasion!”
  • And the Queen goes, “Well, if I let some general fight all these battles for me, he’ll totally amass enough fame and power to make a bid for the throne; if I want to protect my son’s crown, I have no choice but to take up arms and lead the troops myself!
  • (Btw, I want to stress that this woman is not Eowyn or Boudica and nothing in the way her story is presented suggests that she had any interest martial exploits before or in any way came to enjoy them during these battles.  This is a perfectly ordinary court lady who would much rather be embroidering altar covers for the royal chapel and playing with her child until necessity made her go, “Oh no, this sucks, I guess I have to become a Warrior Queen now” and she just happened to kick ass at it anyway.)
  • And the Queen totally kicked ass, but the whole “twice as good for half the credit” thing meant that no matter how many battles she won, potential enemies refused to take her and her army seriously until she had defeated them so no sooner would she fend off one invasion than another one would pop up on a different border.
  • So she spent the majority of her young son’s life away from the castle leading armies, but it was OK because she left him in the care of her two best friends, who just happen to be fairies!  This was an awesome idea because a) fairies have magic, and therefore are like the best people to protect the prince from any threats and b) fairies consider themselves to be so above humanity that the lowest fairy outranks the highest mortal, so they’d have no interest in taking a human throne.  Good thing they were both good fairies instead of one good and one evil one!
  • (Spoiler:  they were not both good fairies.)
  • So the two fairies basically take turns raising the prince until he’s old enough to rule.  And on the eve of his twenty-first birthday, the evil older one comes into the prince’s bedroom.
  • “So listen, kid.  You’re about to become king, your mother’s on her way home from the war to see you crowned, and I have a third piece of good news for you!  You see, I’ve actually been spending so much time here lately because Fairyland’s become a bit too hot to hold me for reasons totally not related to me being secretly evil.  And if I have to hang in the human world, I might as well reside in the upper echelons of it, so even though as a powerful fairy I completely eclipse your puny human status in a staggeringly unimaginable way, since you’re about to be king and since my premonition that I should stick this whole guardianship thing out because you would be hot one day has totally proved accurate (go me), I will graciously lower myself to allowing you to marry me.  Please feel free to grovel at my feet in gratitude.  (Btw, we can totally start the wedding night now, we’ll tell your mother about it when she arrives tomorrow.)”

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You’re sitting in the theatre. Everything is perfect. It’s accurate, it’s visually stunning, everyone is on point. It’s a perfect adaption. The title flies on screen.
Deep voice: Fullmetal Alchemist
Everyone in the theatre:(slightly different intonation) Fullmetal Alchemist.

Good Things that Happened in 2016

·         New chemotherapy breakthroughs have increased the 5-year survival for pancreatic cancer from 16% to 27% (and is getting better)

·         Scientists figured out how to link robotic limbs with the part of the brain that deals with intent to move so people don’t have to think about how they will move the limb, it can just happen.

·         Child mortality is down everywhere and it keeps going down.

·         Thanks to the ice bucket challenge the gene responsible for ALS has been found, meaning we are closer to an effective treatment. Let me rephrase that: we are close to getting a treatment for a very bad disease because a lot of people (including really hot celebrities) got wet.

·         A solar powered plan circumnavigated the world.

·         Michael Jordan donates 2mil to try and help bridge connection between police and the community.

·         Tiger numbers are growing.

·         And manatees.

·         And pandas.

·         Pakistan has made strides toward outlawing honor killings.

·         70,000 Muslim clerics declared a fatwa against ISIS.

·         Pokemon Go players went insane with placing lure modules near hospitals for sick kids.

·         California is now powering over 6 million homes with solar power, a record in the US (and that is the tightest shit)

·         Volunteers in India planted 50 million trees in 24 hours.

·         Apparently world crime as a whole has drastically declined as a whole in the last couple of decades.

·         Coffee consumption has been proved to help curtail cancer and suicide rates.

·         Speaking of coffee Starbucks figured out how to donate perishable food in a food safe way.

·         500 elephants were relocated to a better, safer and bigger home.

·         We made massive strides in Alzheimers’ prevention (my grandmother literally told me that scares her more than getting cancer this is very good news)

·         The ozone layer is repairing itself and all the work we did to get rid of those aerosol chemicals was actually worth it.

·         A new therapy developed in Israel could cure radiation sickness.

·         The Anglican church resolved to solemnize same-sex unions the same as opposite-sex unions which required a super majority of all three orders of the church (lay, clergy, bishop).

·         The Rabbinical Assembly issued a resolution affirming the rights of transgender and non-conforming individuals.

·         Precision treatments for cancer are hitting clinical trials and WORKING (as someone who’s had relatives with cancer this is the best news)

·         Dentists are once again providing free care to veterans who need it.

·         The Orlando Shakespeare Festival showed up with angel wings to block funeral-goers for the Orlando Pulse victims, view from anti-gay protesters

·         Rise Women’s Legal Centre opened

·         Death by heart disease has decreased by 70% in the United States

·         Two brothers saw color for the first time thanks to specially-designed glasses

• Portugal ran its entire nation solely on renewable energy for four days straight

·         A retiree is launching a project to transport 80 endangered rhinos to an Australian reservation to save the animals from poaching

·         An Afghan teacher has been delivering books via bicycle to villages that lack schools

·         Harriet Tubman is going to replace Andrew Jackson on the $20 bill.

·         200 strangers attended the funeral of a homeless WW2 veteran with no family

·         A teen battling cancer married his sweetheart

·         Bank firm pays for college tuition for the children of employees who died in the 9/11 attacks

·         New medicine has been shown to increase melanoma survival rate to 40%

·         Over 800 Boko Harem Hostages were rescued by Nigerian Army

·         Toys R Us is Offering Quiet Shopping Hour for kids with autism this holiday season

·         Volunteers made special tiny Halloween costumes for NICU babies

·         A 4-year old befriends a lonely man and helped him heal after losing his wife

·         Families grew

·         People survived c ancer

·         People overcame depression

·         Any kind of victory, even if it affects only one person,  is a victory

·         Now for the pop culture good news

·         LEONARDO DICAPRIO WON AN OSCAR! EVERYONE READING THIS LIVED LONG ENOUGH TO SEE LEO FINALLY GET WHAT HE DESERVED

·         There’s a new Harry Potter book

·         And a movie

·         Harry Potter has no plans on vanishing with time

·         This sweet father gave candy to passengers on a flight so his little girl could trick or treat on Halloween

·         LET ME TALK ABOUT ALL THE KICK ASS MOVIES WE GOT THIS YEAR OH MY GOD

·         Kung Fu Panda 3, this franchise is still going strong despite that its about a panda played by Jack Black

·         Jungle Book. The amazing remake none of us saw coming

·         Finding Dory. I haven’t seen it yet but I’ve heard good things

·         Kubo and the Two Strings. Haven’t seen that yet as well but its Laika so I know it’s a masterpiece

·         Deadpool. The beautiful and super accurate R-rated marvel film

·         Captain America: Civil War. Seriously is the best marvel movie yet in my opinion I need more.

·         Zootopia. Oh don’t mind me I’m just a movie that tackled the issue of racism and not only game changed animated films but also made a billion dollars

·         The Hamilton Mixtape is coming out. Which is a bunch of artists singing songs from the musical (Sia, Usher, Regina Spketor, etc.) I’m excited.

·         A personal victory for myself, I joined Tumblr and met angels in blog form so…that’s uplifting.

·         And I met my favorite voice actor at a con which was a bucket list accomplishment.

Good Things that have yet to happen this year

·         Birthdays

·        Thanksgiving

·         Black Friday

·         Moana

·         Christmas

Good things that have nothing to do with the year but will hopefully make you feel better

·         Puppies

·         Chocolate

·         Rainbows

·         Rain (I like listening to rain it’s one of the most calming sounds)

·         Cartoons

·         Kissing

·         Music

·         Friends

·         FF: If you are a religious person you are an imperfect masterpiece

·         FF: If you are not then you are a splendid coincidence

·         Any year spent with loved ones be they family or friends is a good year. Trust me.

·         ”A laugh can be a very powerful thing. Why, sometimes in life, it’s the only weapon we have” –Roger Rabbit

#NeverForgetTheGood


*Plz feel free to add other good news (even if it’s something small like you ate cheesecake THAT is good news)

*at the end of the year I plan to remake this list with new things, fixed mistakes and links but will be posting from my side blog @iamrainbow
Humans are Weird: Spices

Alien: Today in my “Human Studies” book, I’m reading about human foods.

Human: Ooh, cool.

Alien: But I’m not sure this is accurate. It says here that humans purposely ingest a plant high in a pain-causing chemical, capsaicin.

Human: Oh, peppers? Yeah. Spicy.

Alien: But why would you want to eat something that causes you pain?

Human: Some people like the burn. I think it causes the same sort of reaction as drinking alcohol…?

Alien: That activity doesn’t make sense to me either. Can we discuss it after?

Human: Sure.

Alien: So, these “peppers.” Do you enjoy eating them?

Human: Me? Well, not by themselves. But I do like somewhat spicy foods. My brother, though, he likes them much hotter. He’s eaten some really spicy peppers, even ate a ghost pepper by itself.

Alien: Ghost pepper.

Human: Yeah, it’s the spiciest natural pepper. His face got pretty red, and he got the hiccups.

Alien: That… doesn’t sound like a healthy reaction.

Human: It just means that it’s a really spicy pepper. I mean, if I ate one of those, it might kill me, but he was fine.

Alien. Why would it kill you?

Human: Too spicy. You have to have a tolerance for capsaicin or it can literally kill you. And the ghost pepper is so hot that to handle it, you gotta wear gloves.

Alien: Your planet has plants that can KILL people, and which you can’t handle directly, and your brother ATE ONE, by ITSELF??

Human: Yeah.

Alien: …

Human: He says that when he gets desensitized to ghost pepper, he wants a Carolina Reaper.

Alien: I’m almost afraid to ask.

Human: …

Alien: What’s a Carolina Reaper?

Human: A pepper scientifically engineered for spiciness. It’s currently the world’s hottest pepper.

Alien: *stares at human in disbelief*

Alien: *stares at human studies book*

Alien: *stares at human again*

Alien: *whispers to self* How… how are humans real?

anonymous asked:

i'm just like you! i literally go day by day on my horoscope lmao, but of course we'd be compatible i'm a taurus! I wish there was personalised ones tbh

Haha yes! Taurus are literally always my one true love. And do you mean like a personalised reading?? Cos you can get one of those here! It’s one of the best i’ve found online and although you have to say you’re over 35, all the signs and information is the same so it’ll all be still relevant if you’re not 35, you just need that for the life experience! Mine was scarily accurate, let me know what yours is like as well! 🔮

Well, I just finished Steven Bomb 6 and I’m sure I’ll later have more detailed posts, but here are a few quick notes.

Doug Maheswaren is awesome. He’s relaxed, cool, and genuinely cares about Connie. And he suffers from self doubt about not being enough. He’s just so relatable.

I think Garnet had the best line in the bomb with “I like myself.” Honestly, I was sure that she had drawn an accurate picture of Aquamarine. They got me there.

Speaking of Aquamarine and Topaz, I love them. Pearl recognized them, seemingly as a pair, which suggests that they were around during the rebellion. However, Aquamarine’s attitude suggests that she thinks that the rebellion was a silly thing that was beneath her. At least until Steven revealed his identity. Then she seemed slightly disturbed, at the very least. At any rate, I love that sadistic little fairy.

And Topaz. Her way of grabbing the people was just so cool. I would have never guessed that the yellow light around Steven when he gave a thumbs up was Topaz fusing around him.

So Steven is going back to Homeworld to try to set right what his mother made wrong. I’m not sure it was really the most well thought out decision, but Steven does have somebody on his side, somebody still on the ship.

Lars. Constantly acting brave and tough, but scared. Scared of rejection, scared of not being who he thinks others want him to be, (scared of a gem with a deadly weapon.) I feel that Lars is going to have to do some serious growing.

Give Me Polyamorous Power Couple Hamliza Or Give Me Death

~Eliza growing up having constant crushes on both men and women and trying to articulate what she wanted to Angelica but never being able to explain it the way she wanted

~When she’s in a relationship: “I want her” “But you’re dating Peter” “I want him too” “But you have to choose” “Why do I have to choose?” When she’s not in a relationship: “Ooh, Liza’s got a crush! Spill it!” “Well, there’s Arthur and his girlfriend, and Sally and her girlfriend, and Jason, and Mary…” “Whoa whoa whoa, slow down, how many crushes can you have?” “Shush, I’m not done”

~When she meets Alexander and quickly falls into her most serious relationship ever she expects the multiple crush thing to stop (Spoiler alert: it doesn’t)

~Eliza feels like a horrible girlfriend because she’s so happy with Alex but then Susan from work will start up a conversation with her in the break room and she’s instantly all heart eyes

~Tearfully she admits it to Alex one night and he’s thrilled because “no there’s nothing wrong with you I promise!!!! You’re just polyamorous!!!!”

~They spend the rest of the night talking about it

~Eliza needs some time to adjust since she’s spent so much time trying to push it aside that she doesn’t really know what else to do but Alex is very helpful

~The first time she tells him about Susan he’s instantly chanting ask her out over and over until she’s laughing and blushing at his antics

~Half a year later and Eliza is subtly sending Alex updates from her dates while he sends her multiple thumbs up emojis and does the same with his own

~She also sets up him and Angelica and when Angelica gets confused about it she’s like you need to stop sacrificing yourself, let yourself be happy

~They share embarrassing stories about him with each other

~He meets John and them after Eliza in this one and it’s all separately

~Hercules comes first because Eliza’s father invited them to a fancy dinner party and Alex needs a suit and since he’s not well educated on these things yet she comes along to help

~Hercules is instantly smitten with Alex and Alex is instantly 😍 because “Eliza look at him!!! He looks like a damn quarterback but he’s so sweet and gentle!!!!” “Either you ask him out or I will”

~Hercules not-so-subtly likes guiding Alex around even though he thinks he’s being smooth

~“Alex there was really no point for him to put his hands on your waist like that, he could’ve told you to just move to the side one step” “… Yeah but did you see how well they fit there he could probably lift me up so easily” “Wow you’re so easy” “Do I need to bring up that cute barista the other day” “pLEASE DO WE HAVE A DATE THIS WEEKEND”

~By the end of the time there Alex is going out to lunch with a pleased but confused Hercules and Eliza is eagerly awaiting every cute picture and text

~From then on he has to deal with both Eliza and Alex stealing his clothes but he can’t really fight since they both look so cute in his sweaters

~The rest come really quickly after that

~Lafayette meets Hercules before the others because they come in requesting a special dress to be made and Hercules is Gone

~“You… You want a dress with a full skirt… But when you pick at a stitch on it the dress falls down into a ball gown?” “Yes, exactly!” “Can I ask why?” “Why? Well, chéri, it’s because I must ensure that I always am prepared for any eventuality and at the top of that list is a need to always look beautiful but entirely unattainable. Oh, that reminds me! It needs to be floor length with my being in eight-inch heels, I have a pair with me so you can measure accurately” “Oh holy shit”

~It takes them exactly one weekend to be brought into the relationship (Alex sees them and instantly is stunned into silence, Eliza flirts and within two minutes they’re already co-conspirators)

~John is next and he struggles with his sexuality and anything that comes from it so he’s very much in the closet when they meet

~John and Alex immediately are best friends and Alex tries asking him out but John very quickly refuses him and Alex takes a step back

~The combined power of the four of them helps to bring John out of his shell even though he’s very shy about it all so they’re respectful and let him suggest everything and move their relationship forward in his own time

~The first time he asks to spend the night with all of them there’s a little fight over who gets to sleep next to him

~Eliza and Hercules win, Lafayette and Alex pout

~Aaron and Theodosia Burr AKA Theo, Eliza, and Lafayette kill and the rest of them are literally powerless against them

~Dates are really fun with them because now there’s enough people to go on group dates and everyone can have a supposed other instead of it being just the mess of them (They still do it as the whole of them, its just more fun to have the people think they’re all separate couples then watch as they get more affectionate as the night goes on)

~Don’t think I’ve forgotten about the Washingtons

~George favors Alex and Laf, Martha favors Eliza, Angelica, and Theo, George is platonic with John, Hercules, Aaron, and the girls, Martha is platonic with everyone but her girls and sometimes Alex and Lafayette (She likes showing off that she’s perfectly capable of stealing them away from him but is graciously letting them stay with him. George jokes back and tries to rally Laf and Alex to joke too but they need time to come back to that plane of existence)

~WEEKEND TRIPS AT MOUNT VERNON WITH EVERYONE

~Eliza and Alex get so many kisses and cuddles since they’re the heart of it all

~Alex dragging everyone outside to look at the stars

~Lots of hot chocolate when Alex drags them outside

~Lots of spiked hot chocolate when they think Martha isn’t looking

~She totally knows since John keeps giggling but she let’s them have fun

~THOMAS JEFFERSON

~Eliza starts flirting with him to bug Alex

~Eventually she starts flirting with him for Alex no matter what he says

~“Look at the tension good god” “Betsey I swear…”

~Eliza has a near constant stream of frustrated texts from George

~“Eliza I’m suffering” “What is it this time, dear?” “They’re arguing again and they look two seconds away from making out” “I’m working on it. Have patience” “I can’t have patience anymore I can’t have meetings because this happens in every one”

~All the hate sex

~All the Jeffmads+Alex hate sex (I would include Aaron but the frustrations are over Washington but Aaron knows why Alex is favored by him and has worked out his own balance with George so he’s not jealous)

~Alex pulls them into the dynamic and they finally understand

~George doesn’t mind them finding out, he’s just glad the tension is gone (Though he has cut more than a few work days short because he walked in on them fucking on his desk because Alex wanted to tease him and he can’t handle that so he just walks out)

~There’s multiple incidents where they try to tease Angelica but she is Not Having It and takes great joy in showing them why

~Angelica Schuyler is my queen she wouldn’t handle any bullshit from them

~MARIA REYNOLDS PROTECTION SQUAD

~Elizabeth “If you touch one hair on my girl’s head I will personally kick your ass from here to California don’t test me” Schuyler

~Obviously she moves in with them immediately and spends every night sleeping between Alex and Eliza

~When things become too much in the city Eliza and her take a trip down to Mount Vernon for a girls-only retreat

~Maria and John never start a romantic relationship but they hit it off very quickly since they’re both abuse survivors (Her with James, him with his father) and John is more healed than she is but there’s wounds he’s still licking and sometimes its nice to just spend the day in silence with someone who understands that company is more important than conversation

~Eliza and Alex creating a crazy huge family for themselves which has confusing interconnecting romantic and platonic relationships but they love it so much they can’t describe it

~Whenever anyone asks about it Alex shows them the graph he’s made for them all

~Everyone has a specific color and one poor soul asks why he chose those colors and spends the next 45 minutes listening to him talking about why each of his signifs was given that very color choice

I was at a con recently. And while looking at some of the art, I made a comment to a guy who had a collection of cat avengers prints that he was missing the best avenger. So he goes, ‘oh and who is that’ and I just kinda look sideways at him and say 'hawkeye, the only one you don’t have’. To wich he of course smirks and says 'is he really the best or is it just cause of jeremy renner?’

First of all… Jeremy Renner is a gorgeous human being and he is more than enough reason for Hawkeye to be awesome, so why the hell you got that smug look on your face like I’m just some random ass fangirl who don’t know shit about comics. I was fuckin dressed like Captain Marvel, 100% comic accurate costume thank you very much.

So my dad starts laughing cause he can see I got my 'fight me’ face on. And I proceed to list each and every reason why I have loved Hawkeye since waaaaay before the movies and why he gets even better with new movies and comics.

NUMBER ONE, he is the only fully human Avenger in every single story line.

To which of course I get 'well what about Black Widow’ well sir you must not know your comics very well because in the Earth-616 universe she has the Red Room version of the super soldier serum which gives her enhanced physical abilities as well as a very long lifespan.

Then comes the 'well Scott Lang is human’ well yeah but he’s got a mother FuCkiNG SUPER SUIT. What does Hawkeye have? Spandex or leather, not quite the same thing. And you take away that super suit, is Scott still a super hero? No he is in jail for being a thief. You take away Hawkeye ’ super sui… oh wait that’s right HE DON’T GOT ONE.

'But what about Black Panther he is human right?’ Do you know anything about comics dude? The dude eats a magical plant and is gifted his powers by the Wakandan Panther God and has enhanced speed, strength, agility, healing, reflexes, stamina, etc. NOT FULLY HUMAN he also is proclaimed King of the Dead and is granted the power and knowledge of past Black Panthers and gains the ability to control the dead… so awesome but still not human.

Hawkeye is 100% human 100% of the time (except a very brief moment when he borrowed pym particles just to help out on a mission) and still manages to keep up with super humans, gods and guys with fancy super suits.

NUMBER TWO, he is deaf, canononically.

'Well Daredevil is blind’ his accident enhanced his other senses… and not an Avenger… so your argument is not even relevant.

NUMBER THREE, he shoots a bow, usually a recurve, in battle with people that have magic and laser guns and other shit and he can shoot it with out even looking!

'But he has trick arrows’ wich are guaranteed to be weighted terribly and that weight changes depending on which arrow it is. So he not only has to compensate for the strange weight but he has to do it on the fly in the heat of battle for each individual arrow. Not to mention when he shoots multiple at once.

And come on, have you ever tried to shoot a bow and arrow, it’s not easy. It takes a lot of practice patients and skill. Especially to get as good as him.

NUMBER FOUR, I mean have you read the guys backstory? If you looked up tragic backstory in the dictionary, you would see a picture of Clint Barton. He was orphaned after his abusive father got into a car accident that killed his mother as well. Was sent to a children’s home, ran away to the circus, was trained by Swordsman and Trickshot who were not the best mentors, was betrayed and abandoned by Swordsman and his brother and left for dead, ended up severely injuring his brother, had to leave Trickshot, when he tried to do the hero thing he was mistaken for a criminal, was manipulated into trying to kill Iron Man, kept falling in love with women who didn’t love him back, left the Avengers at one point believing he was unwanted, was passed over because he was not super human, watched his brother die, was forced to leave the Avengers, had a bounty put on his right arm, lost former mentor Trickshot to cancer, split with his wife then watched her die saving him, sacrificed himself and came back, was almost assasinated, went to prison so the rest of his team could go free, was shot and conducted a suicide mission that saved the planet but killed him, lost his memory, was vanished into nothingness, doubted he was himself or even alive, faked his death, and that’s just the short list.

NUMBER FIVE, he ran the West Coast branch of the Avengers, as well as other treams.

NUMBER SIX, he took on the mantle of Captain America for a short time.

NUMBER SEVEN, Caw Caw Mother Fucker.

So yeah, suffice to say that I left the guy speechless surounded by his friends who were nodding along and adding in their own bits of info and laughing hysterically at him. I turned to walk away after that mic drop and heard him mumble, 'well I guess I’m making a cat hawkeye’

Okay, so Hulu has this show called “Harlots,” which has

 - Historical costumes, yum

 - Prostitution treated like an actual profession, and women are complex and well-rounded??????

 - Everyone important is a woman, it’s completely woman-centric

 - It’s ACTUALLY historically accurate in that black people exist in England holy shit

 - Full of absolute joyous Easter Eggs for people who know their history

 - The intrigue is just bursting at the seams, it’s like Game of Thrones with brothels

 - Also, it caused me to make this dumb macro

Tamlin is a PLASTIC.

AND HERE’S WHY:

1. This is how everyone feels about him:

2. This is SO TAMLIN & LUCIEN trying to explain Prythian to Feyre:

3. This is also an ACCURATE description of Tamlin:

4. And this is 100% how the Fandom Feels about Him:


SO BASICALLY: Tamlin is a freaking plastic as well as a tool and You can’t tell me otherwise.

Show Me That You Love Me

(ao3, buzzfeed article that inspired this nonsense)

(Monday, Feb 6)

Clarke: FYI, I’m telling my coworkers that we’re dating so this creep will stop hitting on me
AT WORK

Bellamy: You can’t just leave it at that.
How creepy are we talking?  
You know if I don’t get specifics my mind jumps straight to the worst-case scenario.

Clarke: It’s not that big a deal? Mostly just annoying
But he won’t take no for an answer so I told him I had a boyfriend

Bellamy: Not a girlfriend?

Clarke: They know I’m bi already because I ranted about gross stereotypes at the Christmas party
It’s why they instituted a two-drink limit
And if he doesn’t respect my hard “no” I doubt he’ll respect my girlfriend’s so
Boyfriend

Bellamy: You sure you don’t want to date him? He sounds like a charmer.

Clarke: I was sure the first fifteen times he asked and my decision hasn’t wavered.
I wouldn’t have even mentioned it to you except I know Anya comes to the bar sometimes and I didn’t want you to blow my cover

Bellamy: Consider your cover secure.

Clarke: Thanks. I owe you one.

Bellamy: What are fake boyfriends for?

* * *

(Wednesday, Feb 8)

Clarke: WTF???

Bellamy: I see you got my flowers.

Clarke: They’re hard to miss seeing as they take up MY WHOLE CUBICLE
It smells like a rainforest
My allergies are killing me
Seriously. Why.

Bellamy: Can’t I just show my fake girlfriend that I appreciate her?
Why must you always assume I have ulterior motives?

Clarke: Because I know how expensive flowers can be and you’re the biggest coupon-clipping Scrooge I know

Bellamy: I’m helping!
I’m just trying to back up your story, Princess.

Clarke: You’re just trying to embarrass me in front of my coworkers is what you’re doing

Bellamy: Remember that time you made me do karaoke with you?
Some might consider us even now.

Clarke: You know Valentine’s Day is next week right? If you do something like this on a random Wednesday, you’re going to have to do something for that too or else Cage will think we’ve broken up

Bellamy: So I’m going to have to top myself is what you’re saying.

Clarke: I don’t think that’s what I said at all

Bellamy: If you insist, Princess.

Clarke: I don’t insist. I STRONGLY DO NOT INSIST.

Bellamy: Unrelated question: what song would you most like to have serenaded to you?

Clarke: If that’s how it’s gonna be then start preparing yourself
Cause it’s on, Blake

Bellamy: Dammit, I did not think this through.

Keep reading

my “OC”. If you’ve met me at a convention you know just how accurate this is.

Anyways, drew this up for a new profile picture, my old one was getting pretty dated so I thought I’d get something more bobdude. I think this is pretty perfect, gives you a good idea of me as an artist as well as exactly what you’re gonna see me post haha

Anyways, new Sweetie new look, hope y’all like it. I’ll have to get used to clicking on this sweetie instead of the old one when I’m checking notifications now haha

5

I Origins (2014) - Mike Cahill

5 bullets on this film:

  • This is one of the most beautiful films I’ve ever seen. The story, the details and the characters are so inspiring and deep that I was kind of shocked when the movie was over. Indie movies are the best, man.
  • I really like the contrast and the connection between science and religion, and this movie used this theme very well. I was expecting a boring love story but it ended up messing me up for weeks because I couldn’t stop thinking about it.
  • The cinematography and the soundtrack are amazing.
  • The actors are so beautiful, damn. If you like hot people talking about science and religion, that’s it. Astrid Bergès-Frisbey made me question my life choices.
  • Stop saying that this film is not scientifically accurate because no one cares!!!! The story is good, and that’s it. It’s a movie, not a Stephen Hawking’s theory. And it’s not about religion either, it only ‘explains’ the connection between the ‘spiritual world’ and science. 
THOMAS SANDERS NAME CORROLATION POST

Okay after the new video I noticed a little thing. The names of the sides in the @thatsthat24 videos seem to correspond with a personality trait they may have.

Logic - Logan - Logic(al)
Princey - Roman - Romantic
Morality - Patton/Patten - Patient or Paternal (kinda)

My point? Well, what if..

Anxiety - Warren - Worries.

THIS IS A DOCUMENT AND PROOF OF MY BELIEF THAT ANXIETYS NAME IS WARREN. IF IT IS ACCURATE, THIS IS AN “I TOLD YOU SO”

THIS IS ME ACTUALLY CALLING IT THAY HIS NAME IS WARREN.

ITS EVIDENCE GHAT I CALLED IT FIRST

ILL REBLOG THIS SEVERAL TIMES WHEN WE FIND OUT. IF IM RIGHT ILL BE THE SMUGGEST MOTHERFUCKER

shut me up

Title: Shut Me Up
Pairing: Tyler Joseph/Reader
Rating: Very Mature
Warnings: Alcohol use, knifeplay, blood play, lots of dirty talk, rough!Tyler, fun risky stuff, there’s a whole lot going on here.
A/N: I’ve been trying to write something like this for some time now, and I have Bren to thank for finally giving me the push I needed to do it. If this goes over well, know that I’m writing some even darker stuff in the future, so you’ll have that to look forward to. Now, this is more intense than what I usually write, so make sure you read the warnings; if you neglect the warnings, and are displeased by what follows, don’t blame me. I have warned you. Enjoy!

Originally posted by ifeellessalien

Keep reading

  • Yoosung: Hey Seven, why does Zen look so depressed?
  • 707: Oh, he’s just heart broken because his other half left him.
  • Yoosung: Huh?? MC left him?! Why??
  • 707: No, the mirror in his room broke.
Legion is fucking amazing

Excuse me if you don’t like the series but if you are not watching it you are missing from the greatest shit ever. 

The way the producers scripted David’s dialog, it’s so fucking accurate, all the mumbling and the incomplete sentences, and Dan’s acting is superb, wtf. All the visuals too. Gosh, I’m in love with this shit. They portray everything so fucking well, the schizophrenia, delusions, claustrophobia, anxiety! awesome. And the plot is getting so goooood. And they really, really nailed the “What’s real and what’s not?” shit. 


Can’t wait for more! This TV show deserves all the awards and recognition. Please let it have a second seasons and a lot of viewers    

anonymous asked:

In a parallel universe if you were left in charge to write a SasuSaku movie about how Sasuke and Sakura's travels and how they got together, how would it go? What type of scenes and sequences would you include? How would the movie began? How would it end? What would be the general plot?

Hmm, I suppose I would make the general plot revolve around how Sasuke would be slowly getting over his demons, would be slowly opening up to Sakura more and more about his past with his family, his relationship with brother, his emotions and feelings during the massacre, and how he’d recount to Sakura the relevant events between himself and Team 7 that occurred within the main manga. These conversations would be the crucial parts of the movie, and would take place at regular intervals. For instance, during anytime they’re able to have some time to themselves, whether it be during a break in one of their missions, while travelling to the next location, or at night during one of the inns they stayed at.

I’d have the movie begin from where Sasuke Shinden ended; with Sasuke choosing to return home to Konoha:

From there, I’d direct a quick summary of his time there and when he left again, up to when Sakura decides to catch up to him. This is because it’d be important to provide the context of how they came to be at that point, but I wouldn’t want to dwell on it because in the grand scheme of things, that’s a relatively unimportant matter.

I’d involve some action here and there, like during the scenes when the two of them are helping out the local residents with some thugs or other things of the sort. However, I’d make the movie be very dialogue heavy, kinda like the Monogatari series, because I’d want the focus to remain on the conversations that Sasuke and Sakura have, in order to really emphasise how Sasuke slowly comes to terms with the world, with himself, and with his feelings for Sakura that had been developing for some time.

One pivotal moment I’d include would be when Sasuke tries to explain what happened in the Land of Iron from his perspective. He’d be hesitant in his elaboration, because he didn’t know Sakura would respond to being reminded of those events. However, Sakura would then recall why she couldn’t bring herself to end his life when given the opportunity; she knew that despite how far he’d fallen, he was still in there somewhere - she’d then tell Sasuke that it was what she was trying to get through to him when she confessed her love for him the 2nd time. Sasuke would remain stubborn about whether he could fully be redeemed, as he’d then bring up his immediate response to her 2nd confession. However, it would be at this point where Sakura would reach her wit’s end. She’d tell Sasuke that there isn’t much more she can do for him, if he himself isn’t willing to accept the fact that he’s not the same person he was. She’d then go to bed, and leave him to ponder on her words.

This conversation wouldn’t be mentioned again until towards the end of the movie, where after they had helped a particularly influential family who coincidentally happened to echo Sakura’s earlier words to Sasuke, he’d admit to her that maybe she was right; maybe he would be able to fully make up for his sins against the world and towards his friends, and perhaps even one day become a ninja who was highly respected in the world. Sakura would feel her heart swell at this, that Sasuke was finally coming to terms with who he was and the fact that it wasn’t too late for him, it was never too late for him.

Following this, Sasuke would want to thank Sakura for never giving up on him, never losing faith in him, because as he’d tell her, if it wasn’t for her and Naruto’s continued faith in him, he’d never have been able to find the faith in himself. So he’d thank her, but he’d feel as though that wasn’t enough. Sasuke would notice that just prior to their travels, he had begun to think of Sakura more and he couldn’t explain why; he just wanted to see her and spend more time with her. So after this realisation, he’d try desperately hard to try and convey this to Sakura, and tell her just how much she meant to him. However, Sasuke isn’t the most articulate person when trying to convey his feelings, especially when they were affectionate, so he’d be really struggling. Thus, for a while, all Sasuke would be able to get out is:

However, Sakura knew what Sasuke was trying to say, so her face lights up in anticipation, as she anxiously waited for Sasuke to finish, as so:

Yet, Sasuke just didn’t know how to finish the sentence; he couldn’t find the right words to accurately portray how he felt, whilst simultaneously trying to not seem as though he didn’t expect anything in return. So Sasuke would be visibly disappointed at his inability to finish his sentence. It is then that Sakura would come forward to plant a soft and brief kiss on his lips, because she was appreciative of what he was trying to do. She knew what he was trying to say, so she’d then say “Thank you, you mean a lot to me as well”.

Sasuke would then say “Yeah…”, and in an attempt to prevent an awkward silence, he’d come up with an excuse to briefly leave. But as he went on his way, he’d be displaying a familiar smirk on his face, happy that she understood his intentions, and excited at the prospect of what the future may bring:

I’d have the movie end with a quick scene of the future, where it shows Sasuke and Sakura together on the hospital rooftop, with Sasuke’s photo with the Kages collocated into the picture:

Just in order to signify that the wish that Sasuke had voiced towards the end of the movie did indeed come true - he become hailed as a village hero, highly revered and respected by everyone, and the master of his best friend’s son, all while having his beloved wife and daughter by his side ^_^

Demigods and Paladins 2
  • Shiro: I'm the serious and leaderly one who doesn't have a sense of humor.
  • Jason: No, that's me…
  • Lance: I'm the ladies' man who feels stronger in the water.
  • Percy: I thought that was me…?
  • Lance: But I'm also the seventh wheel.
  • Leo: Me too, buddy. I'm the mechanic.
  • Hunk: Hello, that's me, dude!
  • Leo: And I'm the jokester.
  • Lance: Well whaddaya know, so am I!
  • Leo: And I'm the short one.
  • Pidge: No comment. I'm the smart one.
  • Annabeth: Same.
  • Hunk: I'm the pudgy one.
  • Frank: Hey—
  • Allura: I'm the pretty one with multicolored eyes
  • Piper: I am NOT a label. But if I were, that'd be quite accurate.
  • Nico: I'm the angsty emo one who feels excluded because I come from scary and almost evil ancestry
  • Keith: Okay, this is starting to creep me out a little.