this is really ugly i'm so sorry i just wanted these pictures on my blog ok

anonymous asked:

O.O I saw the pencil sketch of your dragon OC on the other Blog but how did you line art and color it on Paint?!! with a TRACKPAD? ._. And how did you erase the sketch? I'm sorry I'm a n00b but could you do a tut in your spare time for us people without fancy technology? PS: I bow before your skills TT^TT

OKAY INSIDE IS A PRETTY IN-DEPTH TUTORIAL, i didn’t leave out any steps or tricks i use. possibly the most useful ones are terminating the sketch, and how to use the eraser tool to color-swap which makes the following processes a lot easier:

  • putting markings on a color while without worrying about getting out of the lines

  • putting down some shading

  • coloring lineart

  • marking behind a drawing

(if you didn’t know about that, i recommend checking it out in step 4)

Keep reading

Ok look, I post selfies to work on my self-confidence.

I’m trying to like myself, not just as a woman but as a black woman.

I’ve got a lot of internalized issues to deal with. It’s hard believing I’m beautiful.

Even if told I’m pretty by friends and family- people you’d expect to tell you that- it’s hard.

I haven’t been approached with the slightest bit of respect or for anything but my ass except for by 2 guys who I was friends with beforehand and it made me wonder what was wrong with me.

Or getting told that I look like a child when I’m an adult because that’s sad to me when I’m trying to believe in my own attractiveness yet I’m looked at like I’m not an adult (and that makes it even scarier knowing men have tried to approach me without truly knowing that I AM an adult because my ass was good enough for them).

I grew up in the shadow of the white girls who always wore makeup when I didn’t (nothing wrong with that, makeup just does nothing for my face and I look like a clown whenever I wear it) and who were always considered beautiful no matter what.

I grew up reading magazines and seeing ads that had nothing but white beauty anywhere and everywhere. You had to get Ebony, Essence, or JET if you wanted to see Black beauty.

I’m told that I have gorgeous hair, yet I had my hair relaxed at 6 years old and wasn’t allowed to go natural until college.

It must not’ve been that great when I was a child.

I have to unlearn that kinky hair is bad hair and remember that my hair IS good hair too.

It was hard then and it still is hard, trying to get rid of the mindset that the harmful shit I saw and still see built up in me.

I try to remember that being brown-eyed, brown-haired, AND brown-skinned isn’t something that is boring or to be ashamed of even if light eyes and hair and skin are lauded (except when black people go light-haired because then it’s “ghetto”).

I try to remember that someone saying “pretty for a black girl” says more about them and their bullshit than it does about me and that it’s not a fucking compliment rather than thinking about the fact that this statement has never been directed at me because I don’t think that I’m pretty and neither do they.

I’m trying to work on not believing the looks and approach that point to the only good thing about my body being my booty.

I’m trying not to hate the fact that I don’t really have boobs so I look super awkward and ugly in one-piece form fitting clothing.

I’m trying not to hate the fact that I have a skin condition that’s genetic but skipped my siblings and is so prominent on my legs, I have to hype myself up to wear shorts even after I’ve shaved because I think my legs look ugly.

Like, I just fell the other month and scraped up my knees and I started crying because my skin doesn’t heal from injuries well so all I could think was I couldn’t show my knees again because of the scarring- it just makes my legs look even uglier than they are now.

I think this every single day I look down at them. They look ugly therefore add to my ugliness. I still cry.

I mostly love my hair and sometimes I resent it because it’s so hard for me to manipulate.

Sometimes I feel like it’s taken the place of my ass as the one thing that people see on me rather than all of me.

Sometimes I hate it because I secretly see it as the only good thing about me too and I wish there was more.

But then there’s stuff like this.

Sebastian Stan liked my hair.

Anthony Mackie liked my hair.

People go out of their way to tell me they like my hair.

So it makes me happy and proud that this is one thing I can show of myself that is well like and accepted.

And though I sometimes resent it, I’m proud of it. It’s unapologetically black and unapologetically me.

It gives me confidence in ways I’ve never had before.

The comments on my pictures with Sebastian Stan and Anthony Mackie from Wizard World Philly blow my mind while, at the same time, freak me out.

Full on strangers saying I’m attractive (some said I was hotter than the guys) when I can’t even believe that about myself.

It’s scary.

It feels like lies even though I know they are serious (because it’s hard to think that people are honestly saying I’m as or more attractive than to those two guys I mean do you SEE them?! Are we looking at the same two guys? No way am I anywhere NEAR that level of gorgeous).

But at the same time they feel like lies, they feel like truths.

At the same time it’s scary and a good feeling.

And these things, even if temporary, help me believe that I am beautiful.

I’m going to try and embrace my own scars the way I do everyone else’s scars.

And I’m going to try and embrace the other parts of me that I don’t think are anything special and try to see them as extraordinary.

I don’t think I’m pretty… but I’m working on it.

So thanks. And don’t give up on me.

Maybe I’ll believe you guys one day, maybe I won’t.

But I will try.