because ive moved on from being a mostly caejose-exclusive blog to a more personal blog that occasionally posts caejose, i decided to post this list that’s been in my drafts for a long long time that i always refer back to when i am hungry for content
Hi guys, I’ve been feeling very weird and anxious since last night so I’ve been having a hard time sleeping because I just have a lot of thoughts lately I guess. But whenever I have these kind of mornings where I can’t sleep I think about a lot of stuff probably too much. xD But I realized what the date of today was and I just wanted to talk about something or look back on something.
So today is the 22nd of August and that makes it exactly 5 months since I met Jack at Pax East. I bring it up in my posts still because that trip and meeting him really impacted me and I want to talk about why it did. It’s kind of funny because in some of the posts I made before I even went on the trip and was just thinking about it I felt like it was going to impact me or change some things about my life. Basically to me that trip ended this chapter of my life of all the changes I made and all the stuff I had went through (both positively and negatively) since March 2015. Did this trip change my life? Honestly it did in certain regards but also not a lot it mostly just changed the way I saw and thought about certain things. I’ll be honest I was terrified at the thought of meeting Jack because he’s kind of been the center or the biggest influence of all the positive changes I’ve made for myself. But I needed to meet him and talk to him not for the sake of meeting a youtuber or a person I just wanted to talk to and that’s all I ever wanted from Jack was just to have a real conversation with him and that was it. But I needed to do this for myself too as way to kind of validate everything I was feeling and as a way to just end this chapter of my life. So I kind of unintentionally made meeting Jack my biggest goal of that trip and I didn’t even know if it was going to happen or not because I was only able to go on the first day of the convention. But I did it I met him and I got the 1 thing I always wanted from him after waiting 4 and ½ hours in a line. xD
I look back on this trip all the time and replay all the memories and remember everything that I felt and even realizing more stuff I felt during it too. Speaking as honestly and genuine as I can that trip was the first time I felt alive and excited for something in such a long time. If you knew some of the stuff I had to go through before this trip you’d understand why that was. Plus the biggest thing about how I felt was in just the short time I met Jack I seriously never had felt so much like myself around another person. That’s saying a lot because I do feel like myself around my friends. But honestly despite the fact I was nervous I felt like I could be ALL of who I genuinely am in front of Jack and that was the first time I met him and really talked to him and that’s a feeling I could never forget. I’ve talked to my counselor about this trip and how I felt and she told me to look at the picture Jack and I took together because she said you could see on my face that I felt so alive and genuinely me in that moment. So now when I look at this picture now
I don’t just see a picture of Jack and I. I see me feeling alive and like my genuine self in that moment. Feeling all of this in this moment it helped me realize that deserved to and want to be happy with my life. After years of never knowing what direction towards the future I was going or what I wanted to with my life it helped me realize at least one thing that I wanted for myself and that’s very important to me you guys have no idea.
Another one of the biggest things that changed because of trip was how I saw Jack. I always tried to see Jack as a person as much as I can but I feel like I see and treat him much more like a person now then I ever did before I met him and that’s because I got a better sense of what’s important to him and who he is as a person. To show you guys a little more of my perspective I found this picture on my phone that I took while I was waiting in line that I thought I deleted but didn’t for whatever reason but it does show what I saw while I was waiting in this line for so long. It’s kind of a creepy picture but the only reason I took it was because my sister was texting me and asking me how far away I was from the front of the line. (Sorry Sean if you end up reading this post. xD)
^ This is all I could see while I was waiting in this line. I could never see Mark or Wade at all the whole time I was waiting in this line. The only one who I could see meeting people was Jack and half the time I couldn’t see him either. But the closer I got to the front of the line the more I saw of him meeting people and let me just say this is something I’ll never ever forget. Every single time I saw Jack meet someone you could tell just by his body language and the expressions on his face that every single individual person he met mattered to him. I could see all the genuine appreciation and love that he has for this community. That showed to me how much the community and doing youtube every day truly means to him and because I saw that the more I see it in him in his videos now every single day.
Seeing this and meeting him myself helped me see him in the way I always wanted to see him which is a person. To me he’s become waaaay more then just a youtuber I love to watch that gave me positive inspiration and that I take screenshots of everyday. He’s become even more of a real person to me and a friend I get to hang out with everyday and poke fun at the dumb silly stuff he does and as someone I genuinely care about the well being of and want to get to know more and truly believe he can do anything he sets his mind to. :) I see him much more as someone who’s on the same equal ground as me instead of someone on a pedestal that I constantly got scared of offending because I felt like they were better then me and I know now that’s not true at all. Jack’s not superior to me or better then me because he’s a popular youtuber that gave me positive inspiration and I’m not beneath him because I’m a viewer that screenshots his face everyday. We’re both people at the end of the day with flaws, fears and insecurities. Now I know I can just be me around him and I’m not scared anymore of showing that. All of this is why I won’t ever forget this trip. I would love to talk to Sean again one day and hopefully that won’t be after waiting in another 4 and ½ hour line. xD
I just wanted to share those thoughts with you guys and tell you why this trip really impacted me in the best way that I can. Sorry this post is kind of long though but I hope some of you enjoyed reading this anyway. :)
Summer is in full swing and our spring crops are probably producing great vegetables by now. It is not to late to plant a second or third crop in August and have great, organic food well into the cooler months.
I posted an article a last month on what vegetables can be planted in July and it was met with great comments and lots of shares on social media. As it was a great success, I decided to look for what can be planted in August too.
This is important if you are prepping and want to use the vegetables to can or freeze for the winter months. Having a fall or late summer garden will save you a lot of money and best of all, your food will be organic and fresh! So get to planting your garden without delay and you will be rewarded soon enough with a bounty of wonderful vegetables.
In the link below are lists, by U.S. region, of which vegetables and herbs you can plant in August. Unless specifically listed as “transplants” the items in this list can be direct-sown in your garden this month.