this is not what you want to hear when eating dinner

What we really need is an adaptation of the original 1740 The Beauty and the Beast

So were you aware that the The Beauty and the Beast story we all know is a heavily abridged and rewritten version of a much longer novella by Gabrielle-Suzanne Barbot de Villeneuve?  And that a lot of the plot holes existing in the current versions exist because the 1756 rewrite cut out the second half of the novella, which consisted entirely of the elaborate backstory that explains all the weird shit that happened before?  And that the elaborate backstory is presented in a way that’s kind of boring because the novel had only just been invented in 1740 and no one knew how they worked yet, but contains a bazillion awesome ideas that beg for a modern retelling?  And that you are probably not aware that the modern world needs this story like air but the modern world absolutely needs this story like air?  Allow me to explain:

The totally awesome elaborate backstory that explains Beauty and the Beast

  • Once upon a time there was a king, a queen, and their only son
  • But while the prince was still in his infancy, in a neat reversal of how these fairy tales usually go, the king tragically died, leaving his wife to act as Regent until their son reaches maturity
  • Unfortunately, the rulers of all the lands surrounding them go, “Hmm, the kingdom is ruled by a woman now, it must be weak, time for an invasion!”
  • And the Queen goes, “Well, if I let some general fight all these battles for me, he’ll totally amass enough fame and power to make a bid for the throne; if I want to protect my son’s crown, I have no choice but to take up arms and lead the troops myself!
  • (Btw, I want to stress that this woman is not Eowyn or Boudica and nothing in the way her story is presented suggests that she had any interest martial exploits before or in any way came to enjoy them during these battles.  This is a perfectly ordinary court lady who would much rather be embroidering altar covers for the royal chapel and playing with her child until necessity made her go, “Oh no, this sucks, I guess I have to become a Warrior Queen now” and she just happened to kick ass at it anyway.)
  • And the Queen totally kicked ass, but the whole “twice as good for half the credit” thing meant that no matter how many battles she won, potential enemies refused to take her and her army seriously until she had defeated them so no sooner would she fend off one invasion than another one would pop up on a different border.
  • So she spent the majority of her young son’s life away from the castle leading armies, but it was OK because she left him in the care of her two best friends, who just happen to be fairies!  This was an awesome idea because a) fairies have magic, and therefore are like the best people to protect the prince from any threats and b) fairies consider themselves to be so above humanity that the lowest fairy outranks the highest mortal, so they’d have no interest in taking a human throne.  Good thing they were both good fairies instead of one good and one evil one!
  • (Spoiler:  they were not both good fairies.)
  • So the two fairies basically take turns raising the prince until he’s old enough to rule.  And on the eve of his twenty-first birthday, the evil older one comes into the prince’s bedroom.
  • “So listen, kid.  You’re about to become king, your mother’s on her way home from the war to see you crowned, and I have a third piece of good news for you!  You see, I’ve actually been spending so much time here lately because Fairyland’s become a bit too hot to hold me for reasons totally not related to me being secretly evil.  And if I have to hang in the human world, I might as well reside in the upper echelons of it, so even though as a powerful fairy I completely eclipse your puny human status in a staggeringly unimaginable way, since you’re about to be king and since my premonition that I should stick this whole guardianship thing out because you would be hot one day has totally proved accurate (go me), I will graciously lower myself to allowing you to marry me.  Please feel free to grovel at my feet in gratitude.  (Btw, we can totally start the wedding night now, we’ll tell your mother about it when she arrives tomorrow.)”

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Roommates (M)

Originally posted by bwipsul

╳ Pairing: Jimin x Reader 

╳ Genre: (one shot) smut and kinda fluff & angst ??

╳ Summary: Being roommates with your best friend can be fun until one day you look at him differently. 

(this is something that I found that I had written months ago and just decided to post it!!)


The day you looked at your best friend as more than a friend, you knew you were screwed. It happened out of nowhere. You just woke up one morning and looked at him differently. You were never going to tell anyone, you weren’t stupid. That would just lead to Jimin being freaked out and nothing being the same. Risking your friendship with Jimin was not worth the little crush you had on him.

Deciding that you couldn’t fall back asleep, you got up to start the morning. Walking into the kitchen to get some breakfast, you didn’t notice your best friend standing there.

“Holy shit! Jimin, you scared me!” You yelled, clutching your chest.

“What’s gotten you so jumpy?” Jimin asks, laughing while opening the refrigerator

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Kitten’s Got His Tongue | M | 01

Yoongi & Jimin | BTS | 5.5k Words | 01. 02. 03. 04. 05.

Yoongi orders Jimin and you from a hybrid companion service, but when he receives the two of you, he has no idea what to actually do with you.

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important facts & quotes from hidden oracle reread #4 part one

i cited everything from the hardback edition bc im a nerd 

- page one apollo is already making pop culture references (1)

- meg is such a badass oh my g od (14)

- riodan does such a beautiful way of explaining things in this novels. awe-inspiring. mind blowing. example: “Her eyes glinted darkly like a crow’s. (I can make that comparison because I invented crows.)” (14-15) wow. beautiful. 

- so i understand this series is going to be about Apollo’s redemption and ~~~~finding himself~~~~ or w\e but JESUS PLEASE RICK you can’t just say “She [Meg] reminded me of the strays my sister was always adopting: dogs, panthers, homeless maidens, small dragons.” (15) WITHOUT PROVIDING SEVERAL BOOKS AS EXAMPLE FOR SAID SENTENCE all i want is a book focused on artemis and her army of small dragons and lesbians dear gods please 

- omfg can you just imagine sally having to go over to Percy’s room and having to tell him that the greek god of the sun apollo was there to see him omfg. imagine the salt. imagine both of them just groaning. imagine.

-”If I had still been an immortal, I might have flirted with her [Sally Jackson] myself.” (30-31) l o l Sally is a middle aged married woman seven months pregnant and still bringing in the gods you go girl im proud of you

- Sally Jackson is one of the best characters in the entire series. citation: every riodan book ever even the non-pjo it’s a fact 

- i 10000% support the idea that percy gave apollo the led zeppelin shirt as a sneaky joke he’s so smart i love him so much

- “Percy laced his fingers. They were long and nimble.”(35) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

- He [Percy] would have made an excellent musician.” (35) f u ck 

- literally all percy wants is to “stay alive” long enough to go to college, meet his baby sister, and see his mom get her book published my heart is broken for this boy (35-36)

- the return of the seven layer dip fuck me up (40)

- jfc that poor Prius it’s been through so much (52-54)

- page 67 and Percy’s already made two comic book references he’s such a canon nerd 

- “Cops love me almost as much as teachers do.” god Percy Jackson what are you doing to me

- apollo tried to order a pizza to CHB and honestly same (73)

- g o d will solace jfc wow

- we’re to assume Will’s a skier (his Okemo Mountain jacket & skiers tan) (82) and now i have to write the inevitable fic that comes out of this fact

- Will’s mom was a alt.-country singer from Austin, Texas (83) which wow and honestly makes the fact will is a horrible singer 1000% better

- yellow daises grow year-round in the Apollo cabin, and it smells like fresh linens and dried sage. (83)

- kayla is aiming for the olympics and honestly im so proud already 

- fact: any and all solangelo interaction have me crying into my book 

- “Will put his hand on Nico’s shoulder, ‘Nico, we need to have another talk about your people skills.’” lol this implies that they’ve had this talk before and im dying to hear it

- the Hermes kids are big fans of Rocky Horror Picture Show (95) and now i have to write a seperate list of headcanons for this fact

- speaking of, Apollo used to cosplay as Rocky bc why not. (95-96)

- listen i know im solangelo trash BUT - “Will and Nico sat shoulder to shoulder, bantering good-naturedly. They were so cute together it made me feel desolate.” im destroyed (110)

- “but if I sit alone at my table, strange things happen.” “it’s a mood disorder” “i cant control it” stfu nico u nerd u just want to sit with your boyfriend im dead (110)

- Will nodded serenely. “It’s the strangest thing. Not that Nico would ever misuse his powers to get what he wants.” death to goody-two-shoes will solace 2k17

- off topic but CAN YOU JUST IMAGINE CHIRON THO. like. this happens and will and nico are just standing there. in front of him. telling him they have to sit together OR NICO WILL JUST HAPPEN TO PUT CRACKS INTO HIS CAMP. just imagine. him staring at them. sighing. deciding not to fight this one. agreeing & watching them giggle away bc they’re so SNEAKY & now they can EAT TOGETHER WOW 

-   lol when Meg was going to town on the hot dogs and “Julia and Alice watched her with a mixture of fascination and horror.” (111)

- “Will and Nico exchanged a look that might have meant, here we go.” (112) okay im sorry im just sO GONE FOR LITTLE MOMENTS LIKE THIS I JUST WANT NICO TO BE HAPPY AND COMFORTABLE IN HIS RELATIONSHIPS OKAY

- apollo refers to the seven as “the A-list” (112) same tho

- Jason, Piper, Coach Hedge, Mellie and baby Chuck are all in LA with Piper’s father like???? (113) THIS IS SOMETHING I NEED TO SEE? What’s the living arrangement? Is Jason living with Piper? OH GOD IS JASON LIVING WITH HEDGE AND MELLIE? DO THEY ALL LIVE IN SOME BIG PLACE PIPER’S DAD RENTED OUT???? do Piper and Jason babysit? do they have family dinners? how’s baby chuck doing??? how are they all adjusting to domestic life?? I NEED TO KNOW THIS IS ALL VERY IMPORTANT TO ME 

- lol nico’s just as pissed as eveRYONE IN THE FANDOM about Leo’s not-death and im living for it (113)

- also nico carries around Leo’s lil ‘IM ALIVE LOL’ letter\hologram\thing? like i get it was completely for the plot but?????? “i look at it whenever i want to get angry” (114) like ok nico u lil bean whatever u say u little emo shit

- apollo’s little ‘lol when u have a headache in olympus hephaestus just cracks open your skull and removes whatever brain god\dess u just birthed up lol it’s so much easier ugh’ (116) w h a t t h e f u c k 

- fact: harley is adorable no citation needed

- also you’re telling me chiron, basically as old as time itself tbh, doesn’t speak portuguese? k (120)

- “i am merely assessing how well paolo’s arms are functioning after surgery” (120) those are some big words william u nervous or something??

- “hmph” - nico di angelo, 2016 (120) 

- this isn’t really important but there’s a satyr named herbert and he’s my new favorite character sorry i dont make the rules (124)

- ok so there’s an unnamed random camper who mutters in Italian (127) and now i’ve got the BIGGEST headcanon that this random girl and Nico (omg maybe a few others????) meet a few times a month just to rant to each other in Italian so none of them get sloppy with the language and u g h im such a bitch for nico di angelo frienships

- “A boy in the crowd gasped, ‘she’s a communist!’” (127) i fucking hate this book omfg

i’ll do more later in order to mentally prepare myself for the dark prophecy but it’s 3 am and im tired  

transcript of the speech i gave at Vassar’s black baccalaureate service

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, honored guests, and the Vassar class of 2017.
Just saying that aloud made me feel old. Class of 2017? Most of y'all were born after dark-skinned Aunt Viv left the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. That’s wild.

I want to first thank you for allowing me to be a part of such a special moment in your lives. I am honored, privileged, and a bit in disbelief that you asked me of all people to give this address. I try not to have feelings, and I’m going to do my best not to cry today, but no promises.

I’m here to stand in the gap between you and your parents and guardians and any other elders in your lives that you stopped listening to because you thought they were wack and out of touch. I remember being in your shoes not TOO long ago, and it is my fervent prayer that something that I say here today will help you avoid some of the mess I went through.
To be honest I’m a little nervous, but I figured there was no way could this be worse than when Betsy DeVos went down to Bethune-Cookman, so let’s get started.

As you transition to life after Vassar the changes will be both inevitable and swift, so I’d like to begin by giving you some well-intentioned advice and warning you about the continued process of becoming an adult.

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Nursemaid

(Jimin’s crush comes over to his house to help him out after he suffers an injury that leaves him with limited use of both hands.)

Warnings: 6000+ words of smut, Jimin POV, I’ll let you guess what kind of smut takes place


“I can’t believe you managed to injure both of your hands on the same day.” Hoseok’s girlfriend, Sophie, stifled a laugh while she said it. “I can’t tell if you are dumb or just unlucky.”

 Jimin sighed.  He had been stupid and drunk when he and Jungkook went out into the street to play with fireworks.  One went off too close to his hand, burning his right palm requiring a trip to the emergency room where his injury was cleaned and bandaged.  The doctor gave him a lecture about drunk people and explosives and how fortunate he was not to have blasted off his fingers.            

While exiting the hospital, Jimin immediately tripped over the curb and landed with his full weight onto his left hand resulting in a small fracture and return trip to the emergency room to get a splint to immobilize his other hand.   Now, every time Jimin saw someone, he had to suffer the embarrassment of explaining what happened. People had a hard time not laughing when they heard how he managed to get hurt twice in one day.

 “Does it hurt much?” you asked him.

“Not really. As long as I don’t bump into anything or use my fingers too much, it’s okay.” At least you seemed to be genuinely concerned about his well-being. That’s one of the reasons Jimin liked you, you always seemed caring and sincere.  The other main reason he liked you was because he thought you were incredibly hot.  There were plenty of nights Jimin stayed up fantasizing about what it would feel like to be with you.  He wanted to ask you out, but had been waiting until there was some indication that you were even the slightest bit interested in him.  He was starting to think that maybe he had a chance with you, but he felt neutered with his injuries, unable to do things like casually touch you and see how you would respond to his advances.  Jimin resolved to make a move as soon as he had full use of his hands again.

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anonymous asked:

Okay but wait if it was Lily's willingness to sacrifice herself to save Harry, why the hell did James's willingness to sacrifice himself to save both Lilly AND Harry not qualify???

ok but imagine it did save both of them and lily had to raise harry alone

  • she emerges from the rubble of her home, limping, her crying son in her arms
  • but otherwise they’re both ok
  • when sirius and remus find her sitting numbly in the front yard she can’t bring herself to tell them about the lifeless body she had to walk around in order to get her son out of the smoldering house
  • they do it for her
  • they pull james’ body from the wreckage, and summon a blanket to lay over him
  • with him laid out like that, lily wonders if harry thinks his dada is sleeping
  • distantly she can hear sirius and remus arguing
  • “i’ll kill him”
  • it takes a glare from lily to shut them up
  • “do you think” her voice is raspy- probably from how much she screamed when she heard james hit the floor
  • she holds harry tighter and reminds herself that, no matter how much it already felt like she’s dead without james, she isn’t and she has someone to live for
  • “do you really think,” she starts again, “that he would want you to do that, possibly get yourselves arrested, and leave harry and i alone?”
  • the boys nod
  • and slowly they sit down on either side of her
  • dumbledore and mcgonagall show up shortly after and usher them all to a new safe house
  • they explain james’ sacrifice 
  • how his love saved them both
  • they didn’t need to though- lily knew that was what saved them
  • they bury him in godric’s hollow, just a few spots away from his parents
  • and they try to continue living 
  • peter is found and sent to azkaban but it still doesn’t feel right
  • nothing feels right to lily
  • except harry
  • so she clings desperately to her son
  • she sends him to muggle school and gets a job at flourish and blotts
  • “i need to do something, remus, i’m so bored while harry is at school”
  • she reads harry stories before bed
  • they have play dates with the weasleys
  • sirius and remus come over every day and eat dinner with them
  • and teach harry how to ride a broom
  • marlene baby sits when lily has to work late
  • they go for walks in the park
  • they get a cat, much to sirius’ dismay
  • and when harry’s letter comes lily wonders if she shouldn’t send him
  • but for all that it took from her- the wizarding world gave her so much too
  • best friends, the wonders of magic
  • james
  • and harry
  • so she takes a deep breath and sends him to hogwarts because she knows it’s where he belongs
  • she meets hermione and the two bond instantly
  • harry writes her every week
  • she goes to every quidditch game 
  • and almost punches dumbledore for allowing her son, this little boy, to remain in the triwizard tournament
  • and finally, when she’s at bill and fleur’s wedding, lily sees- despite the polyjuice potion disguising him- a determined expression on harry’s face is so familiar
  • so much like james
  • so lily lets him go again
  • the next time she sees him is at hogwarts
  • and then again in hagrid’s arms
  • and her heart is on fire because she did not lose her husband, raise harry alone and go through hell just to lose him too
  • so she turns to the man who started all of this
  • but just as she’s raised her wand to finish him, who steps forward but neville longbottom
  • and soon after that it’s over
  • lily holds her son in her arms, strokes his hair like she did when he was little and cries because she truly thought she had lost everything
  • “there’s someone you all need to see” harry whispers
  • they find sirius and remus, he leads them into the forest, and turns a stone three times
  • and there’s james
  • lily is vaguely aware of choked sobs coming from behind her- remus or sirius or both, she can’t quite tell
  • james smiles at her and reaches out his hand to gently brush her face
  • she can barely feel it but at the same time it sets her world on fire just like the very first time he touched her
  • “hiya, prongs,” remus murmurs
  • “boys- you’ve aged well”
  • “shame you haven’t” sirius says
  • james smiles sadly at them before turning back to lily
  • “we never got our proper goodbye”
  • “don’t be a fool james potter- how can i say goodbye to you when you’ll never leave me?”
  • he gives her that look
  • the one that always meant “i love you”
  • “i love you too,” she whispers
  • and then he’s gone again
  • but lily leaves the forest with a small smile on her face because after all these years she knows that he never really was
Pack Mom - Derek Hale x Reader

Originally posted by hvproductions

Pairing: Derek x Reader

Prompt: You’ve always been the mother figure to everyone in the pack but when the pups start calling you mom they also start treating you as Derek’s mate, awkwardness and confessions ensue.

Warning: Smut! and other shit! :D 


ENJOY!!

*****

You hopped out of your newly bought Mustang, you knew the pack would be shocked at your new car but the moment you saw the sleek black vehicle you knew it was the one. Your last car got trashed in a car chase with the Calaveras but you dug into your inheritance and decided to get something nicer. The moment one foot stepped out of the new car Stiles was on you with a million questions.

“Ohh my god when did you get this!? How does it run!? How much was it!?” You rolled your eyes but answered all of Stiles’ question calmly because you adored Stiles he was like a brother to you.

“Wow that is one beautiful car.” You heard a gruff voice say from behind you, you knew who it was but you turned around anyway with a nervous grin.

“I know she runs amazingly!” You exclaimed cheerfully which made Derek crack a small smile.

“Did he just smile?” Stiles stared at Derek with wide eyes.

“Yes Stiles I have the ability to smile.” Derek deadpanned.

“How come I’ve never seen you smile at anyone except Y/N? Well unless you count that deputy at the police station who you flirted with. Why don’t you smile at me?” Stiles rambled his arms flying around in an exaggerating manor.

“I smile at Y/N because she is about 5 times more attractive and 100% less hyperactive spaz.” Derek replied easily but when he said you were attractive your mind went blank, your heart started racing rapidly and you knew your cheeks were most likely bright red.

“Ooo Derek and Y/N sittin’ in a tree K I S S I N G fir-”

“Stiles shut up before I rip yo-”

“First comes love!” Erica popped up out of nowhere and started singing along.

“Then comes marriage!” Liam exclaimed as he burst out the door with a grin on his face.

“Then comes a baby in a baby carriage!” The three of them shouted together, at this point you knew your face was bright red so you buried your head in your hands willing it to go away.

“Then comes a divorce because she finally realises how grumpy Derek is.” You heard a cheerful voice at which made you look up to see Peter.

“Derek’s not grumpy.” You huffed at Peter which made everyone turn to you.

“Oh so no divorce?” Peter smirked knowing he’s caught you red handed.

“No! I mean-We’re not…And he’s not-Fuck my life!” You screamed storming into the house the pups soon following behind you.

You sat down next to Isaac and Liam as soon as the pack meeting started, they were both sat very close but you knew it was because contact made them calm. As Derek went through everything he needed to you stared at his chiselled face, the abs that you could see through his tight shirt and his ice green eyes as they darted to and from each pack member who asked question.

As the meeting came to a wraps Liam already had his head on your shoulder and Isaac had his on your lap you glanced at both of them smiling but knew you had to move if you wanted to get started on making dinner.

“Liam honey I need to go start on dinner.” His head shot up, nodding before running off to play video games with the boys.

“Isaac sweetie I need to go make food.” You giggled when he nuzzled into your lap more, you ran your fingers through his hair softly before looking down at his face realising he was sleeping. You lifted his head gently and set it on a cushion once you had moved. His face twisted in one of a lost puppy and he reached for anything he could.

“M-Mama..” He whimpered as his hand touched mine. Suddenly you were aware almost all the packs eyes were on you. You wanted to be embarrassed but you couldn’t be because it didn’t feel weird to be called that by the pups.

“Can I ask why everyone feel like that is something to gawp over?” You snapped in a motherly tone which soon made them lower their heads. As so finally got round to making tea you could hear Isaac shouting at the tv which you assumed to be because of a video game, suddenly Jacksons voice cut through the conversation.

“Aww is mama’s boy losing? Why don’t you go-”

“JACKSON JOHNATHAN WHITTEMORE!” you screamed as you shot out the kitchen door straight into the living area. Jackson froze and dropped his controller.

“Apologise right now!” You shouted as everyone seemed to freeze. Derek seemed ready to jump in but you knew he didn’t need to.

“Sorry Isaac..” You dipped his head slightly as if he’d been scolded by his mother.

“Now who’s a mama’s boy?” Stiles snorted which made your eyes shoot to him.

“Mieczyslaw Stilinski! Get in this kitchen and help me make food!” Everyone stared at you wide eyed making Stiles flush.

“How the hell did you pronounce that so perfectly!? I can’t even pronounce it and I’m his best friend!” Scott exclaimed as everyone stared at you then Scott. You ignored Scott question and followed an embarrassed Stiles into the kitchen.

After you finished making dinner you had the pack set the table and carry the excessive amount of food to the table. You all sat down, staring at the various foods you had made. You sat to Derek’s left and Scott was on his right. You noted that everyone let Derek eat the first bite which was normal because he was the Alpha but when everyone stared at you, you looked to Derek for help.

“Why is everyone looking at me?” You asked confused by everyone’s actions.

“The first person to eat in the pack is the Alpha then his mate, then the Alpha’s second.” Lydia stated calmly as she smiled over at you.

“But Scott is Derek’s second not me?” You replied, your left eyebrow raised slightly.

“But your Derek’s mate. Right?” Isaac asked from the seat next to you.

“What?” You looked back to Derek who was staring at Isaac with the same confused look.

“Guys we’re not dating…” Derek shifted awkwardly in his seat as he spoke it made your heart clench painfully at the fact he was uncomfortable with the idea of dating you.

“Oh sorry the idea of dating me seems so farfetched to you.” You growled at him making everyone freeze for what felt like the millionth time tonight.

“That’s not what I was saying Y/N.” Derek stated softly as he stared into your Y/E/C eyes.

“So what were you saying Derek?” You sneered and everyone seemed to shrink into their seats.

“Well I didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable with everything they were saying…” He whispered his voice trailing off slightly.

“In what world would anyone be uncomfortable with dating Derek Hale?!” You screeched staring at him like he’d grown another head.

“Well if you wanna play that game fine! In what world would anyone be uncomfortable with dating Y/N Y/L/N!” He retaliated harshly.

“So then why aren’t you guys dating?” Liam spoke up softly, everyone turned to look at the youngest of the pack his head held high as if he’d knew he’d said something smart.

“Because Derek doesn’t like me the way I like him and you know this!” You whisper yelled to Liam but realised that you’d said it loud enough for everyone to hear.

“You like me?” Derek asked making you turn your attention to him, your face now bright red.

“Can we talk about this after diner please? I’d like to at least enjoy the food I cooked before you flat out reject me.” You mumbled softly before pushing the food around your plate. You looked up to Derek who was now out his seat. Before you knew what had happened you were yanked out your seat, one of his arms firmly wrapped around your waist and the other hand cupped your cheek.

“Do you like me?” He asked again with more heat and curiosity in his voice, his green eyes stared into yours making everyone else disappear. You nodded softly as your eyes flicked from his to his lips. His lips met yours in a soft yet passionate kiss, after a few seconds of small kisses that stole your breath away you were pulled out by the sound of Isaac’s voice.

“Ew it’s like watching your parents make out.” You pulled away flushing slightly before looking up at Derek who sent you a pantie melting grin which made your knees weak.

“Can we eat now I didn’t slave over a hot stove to eat cold food?” Stiles grumbled which made me turn to him with a raised eyebrow daring him to take all the credit.

“I mean let eat this delicious food mama made and then make sure to give her a foot massage later?” He grinned over at your cheekily.

“Stiles shut up or I will rip your thr-” Derek stopped mid-sentence as you shot him the same look.

“I mean let’s eat then put on Y/N favourite film?” Derek mumbled his eyes wide.

“See now you’re getting it. Okay time to eat.” You giggled pressing a gentle kiss to Derek’s cheek.

After dinner you all put on a film and cuddled on the giant L shaped couch. Everyone was touching in some way with and Derek in the middle of what could only be classed as a puppy pile. You could stop to scared thought that this could just be another one of your dreams about Derek but every time you count your fingers and thumbs you had ten altogether. You buried you head into Derek hard chest which was surprisingly comfortable. You drew shapes absently on Derek’s chest as your listened to his heart beat. Every now and then it would rise and become louder but other than that it was a calming tempo.

Eventually everyone started leaving until you were the last on left in the newly re-built Hale house. You shuffled about as Derek walked you to the front door. As you were about to put your shoes on Derek stopped you grabbing your face and kissing you with so much emotion and roughness you knew your lips would bruise. When he pulled away, you let out a small whine from the loss but opened your eyes to look into his.

“God I’ve wanted to do that all night but I felt like I’d scar the pups.” Derek sighed softly as he started regaining his lost breath.

“Derek…What are we?” You asked softly as his hands made circles on both cheeks.

“You’re mine and I’m yours.” He responded calmly, his hands slipping into your hair. When he gripped your hair slightly you let out a whimper now thoughts of him claiming you, his eyes glowing red as he made you submit, made their way into your head. You soon started to feel your panties grow damn which as soon as Derek took a deep breath through his nose you knew he smelt because his eyes changed from icy green to crimson red.

“Stop.” He growled as your arousal got worse as his red eyes stared into yours.

“I can’t stop the fact that you turn me on Derek.” You chuckled softly, biting your lip so stop another whimper escaping when you felt his hand grip your hair tighter.

“You smell so sweet.” His left hands moved to grip your hip as he drew you closer towards him.

“If you don’t leave now I’m going to take you upstairs and claim you.” Derek growled into your ear, his fangs grazing against the shell of your ear.

“Then do it.” You panted as his mouth moved to your neck.

“You sure that’s what you want I mean we only star-”

Before he could continue rambling you grabbed him by the back of the neck and pulled him down for a bruising kiss. Both his hands gripped your waist in a tight hold but you didn’t care if he left bruises it just meant that Derek wanted you that much he couldn’t control himself and to you that felt empowering.

“Yes I’m sure I want Alpha to claim me.” You whined softly as you pulled away from the kiss.

He didn’t answer with words instead chose to growl at my choice of words, there was something extremely attractive about his red eyes and growls that went straight to your core. You step back from him and pulled off your baby blue summer dress you were currently wearing, leaving you in your underwear, a strapless nude pink bra and matching panties. His eyes roamed over you hungrily as you made your way up the large set of stairs, swaying your hips seductively as you went. He was soon chasing after your almost fumbling like a horny teenager to get his shirt off.

Once you reached his room, you crawled onto his bed on all fours. He made his way over to you gripping your hips tightly. His right hand slowly made its way down your back pushing softly on your shoulder blades so you were face down with your lace clad ass in the air. You giggled shaking your ass at him playfully making another feral growl emit from his chest. He playfully slapped your ass making you playfully moan at him. You knew at this point you were so wet that your panties were likely soaked. His right hand made it way down my back to my ass before skimming over your lace cover pussy.

“Jesus you’re so wet.” He groaned as if this fact caused him and his dick physical pain.

“Mhm because Alpha makes me wet.” You gasped as he moved your panties to one side and ran his index finger through your wet folds.

“What does Alpha’s little kitten want?” He whispered as his lips gave small kisses to your ass cheeks which made you whine softly.

“Want Alpha’s tongue.” You managed to whisper, your hands gripping the sheets tightly in anticipation. Instead of responding he ripped your panties off, his tongue delving into your pussy as soon as the shredded panties were thrown away. You let out a breathy moan as his tongue dipped into your hole, fucking you roughly with his tongue before moving his attention to your clit giving slight kitten licks making you whimper before trying to push back on him. His hands gripped your hips keeping you firmly in place as he continued his ministrations on your dripping core. Soon his fingers entered the mix, his two fingers slowly pushing in and out making your moans louder. He started sucking on your clit making your orgasm start towards the edge.

“D-Derek am gonna’ cum.” You stuttered out barely able to even form the sentence but these words only made his finger go faster and his licks and bites get rougher. You finally felt yourself fall gripping the sheets, his name repeatedly falling from your lips over and over. Finally as you started to come down his attention stopped and you were flipped onto your back.

“Would like to stop now Y/N?” He asked as he hovered over your body his shirt gone along with his jeans leaving him in boxers with a very large noticeable hard on showing. He tucked some of your Y/H/C hair behind your ear, his actions soft and loving making you smiles up at him tiredly.

“No I want you to make love to me.” You smiled at him lovingly as he leaned down kissing your forehead. He nodded as he grabbed a condom from the nightstand, carefully rolling it on. He lifted your legs gently wrapping them around his waist, his tip now teasing your entrance. He looked at you one last time as if asking once again if this was okay but instead of answering verbally, you brought him down for a reassuring kiss. He entered you slowly your back arching softly as you gripped onto his bicep with one hand, the other gripping the sheets. You had only had sex once when you were 17 but he was a lot bigger than the guy who took your virginity. He stopped as soon as he was fully inside of you he looked down to make sure you were okay.

“You okay baby?” He asked softly caressing your face.

“Y-Yeah this is only my second time ever having…” You drifted off yours cheeks flushing tenfold.

“You should have told me I’d of prepared you more!” He whispered yelled his voice full of panic and apologies.

“It’s okay Der I’m fine now you can move.” You whispered bring him down for a chaste kiss.

He looked uncertain with your words but you moved your hips up letting out a gasp followed quickly by a moan. You moved your arms to rest around his neck pulling him down for a slow yet passion kiss as he began with slow thrusts that made you moan into the kiss. He supported himself on one arm and used the other to run his fingers through your L/S hair. He kissed the corner of your mouth as his thrust got harder but not faster. His lips placing a trail of kisses to your neck.

“Shit Y/N…Feels good.” He moaned huskily into your ear.

Your moans were gentle and worn out as you felt yourself building again. When you clenched around Derek slightly brought his hand down to draw circles against your clit. His panting and gasps getting heavier as his thrust became more uneven and messy. His other hand gripped the sheets as he felt you finally cum around his shaft.

“Derek!” Your voice shouted out as you felt yourself cum for the second time.

“I’m cumming…” He gasped as he thrust into deeper than before, making you rasp out a quiet moan. As he came his thrust became more uneven and slowed down before coming to a stop. You were both panting as he took the condom off. He tied it throwing it into the bin before he collapsed next to you. He pulled the covers from under both of you making sure your naked body was covered as he drew you in until your head was on his chest.

“I love you Y/N.” He whispered as he kissed your head, running his fingers through your hair.

“I love you too Der.” You murmured before you felt sleep take you.

I guess being pack mom isn’t so bad after all.

Hexed

Characters:  Dean x Reader, Sam

Summary:  Reader and Dean are…you guessed it…hexed.  Is it a sexual curse or something more?

Word Count:  2111

Warnings:  Lots of language, lots of smut (rough-ish smut)

As always, feedback is appreciated.  Tags are at the bottom.

Originally posted by holy-fucking-damn-shit

Hexed 

There is a time and place for everything, this is neither the time nor the place. Not for Dean to be looking at me like that, no sir. Had I always hoped he’d fix those ethereal green eyes on me that way? My mama didn’t raise a liar, so I’m not going to lie to you. Yeah, I want that man to fix those eyes on me just like that. Wanted him to for a long time now. There’s a lot of things I want from Dean Winchester.  That man is a walking wet dream, sex on bow-legs.

Things is, he’s not supposed to be looking at me like that. Sure as hell not right this very minute.  It’s not part of the plan. We’re working a fucking case for god’s sake. I’m not talking about research or footwork, interviewing and investigating. We are legitimately standing in this room right the fuck now and a motherfucking witch was just here with us. There is a blade in my hand and a gun in his. We had a job to do, one goddamn job.

Now that bitch of a witch is gone. Poof, vanished, adios amigos, just fucking gone. She mumbled some shifty spell work and now Dean fucking Winchester is looking like he wants to screw my brains out.

I’m looking right back at him and I got the same look in my eye.  

I don’t know what that piece of shit did to us, but my breasts are heavy, achy. My nipples are straining against the fabric of my bra and if somebody doesn’t touch them right this very instant and relieve that pressure, I’m going to scream. Or come. I don’t know which.  

There’s a burning in between my thighs, I’m squeezing them together hoping to ease some of the pressure but it’s only making it worse. Times infinity. My skin is all heat and fire, I’m consumed by need and lust.

Dean is a mirror, his eyes reflect back at me the same fever I’m feeling. I can see his cock - Jesus fucking Christ - swelling and straining against those blue denim jeans. In three short steps his crossed the room, a strangled sound leaving his lips before his lips press to mine. Our weapons clatter to the ground making one hell of a racket, but I give no fucks.

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Let Me Protect You - Mitch Rapp

Author: @mf-despair-queen

Characters: Mitch Rapp/Reader

Word Count: 11,337

Warnings: WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN? 18+, NSFW, Oral (both receiving), Orgasm Denial, Multiple Orgasms, Daddy Kink, Shower Sex, Wall Sex, Bondage, Mitch’s Scruff, Mitch’s sexy ass arms and muscles and abs and face and MITCH’S ENTIRE BEING

Notes: Holy. Shit. It’s long overdue but THAT WORD COUNT??? I am dying inside from this. I hope you dirty people like this. Please let me know because this literally killed me inside to write. 

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Butterfly wings

Allura:
When Lance was a kid his mom would say his skin looked like the wings of a butterfly.
Something that was beautiful in how the colours stood out over the base.
She would tell him that he was her little butterfly painted by the angels.
She would tell him this everyday he came home crying because of the teasing from the other kids and the pitying looks from the adults.
When Lance turned ten he stole his sisters makeup and used it to cover the pale areas that were visible on his face, neck and arms. Just to see what it would be like he went to town and for the first time ever blended in. He felt absence of confidence coming from the makeup. But he didn’t want to upset his mom. However getting makeup off is much harder then putting it on.
That’s why hours later his Mom found Lance in the bathroom desperately scrubbing at his skin as she called him for dinner.
He broke down and began to cry begging her not to angry for trying to cover up.
His mom just smiled and kissed his temple telling him that if he wanted to cover up he could or if he wanted his skin on show that was fine too, that he was perfect ether way.
So Lance started wearing makeup and gained a new kind of confidence that he never had before. He was louder and happier even flirting.
When he went away to the Garrison he took enough makeup with him to last until Christmas telling himself as long as he had makeup then everything would be ok.
But the night they found Shiro, Lance didn’t have his makeup with him.
He went to space without it.
With every day that passed the small container he always carried for touch ups became emptier and emptier. He knew it wouldn’t last forever but tonight of all nights to run out.

Lance stared in the mirror at the pale splattering that stretched over his eyes as he desperately rubbed at his skin praying to be able to cover up.
But it was no good.
He was out of makeup.
He wondered if Allura had any and if she would mind him borrowing some. But if he asked then she would see.
What if she laughed?
What if she told the others and they treated him differently?
He couldn’t take the teasing again he just couldn’t.
He put his hands on the sink trying to will himself to calm down. If he could just get to Allura’s room then he could steal her makeup and look normal.
Wrapping his blanket round his head allowing it to trail along the floor behind him Lance tip toes through the hall way.
At this time in the morning most of the other paladins were usually in the kitchen having breakfast or for Keith getting in some training before grabbing a quick bite to eat. This didn’t do much for Lance’s anxieties through. Just the thought of being outside his room without makeup on caused his chest to tighten with panic.
This was so much worse.
He felt like every cell in his body was on edge, vibrating with fear of being caught.
When he reached Allura’s room he had to wipe the sweat off his hands before getting the door open.
Allura’s room was huge.
Much bigger then all the paladins rooms combined and filled with various alien nick nacks and photos from Altea.
Lance felt bad about being in her room without permission, but he told himself it would be worth it in the end.
However after almost an hour Lance had found nothing.
No concealer.
No powder.
Nothing.
He felt his chest tighten as the tears began to fall.
What was he going to do?
The team already thought he was nothing but a pretty face, he’ll be even less then nothing if they realise he’s not even that.
As his breaths came less frequently and quicker Lance slowly slipped down to the floor holding his throat with his hands.
He didn’t hear the door slide open.
He didn’t hear the gasp or the sound of footsteps running over to him.
But he did hear his name.
“Lance?” Allura asked panic clear in her voice. She put a steadying hand on his shoulder trying to get him to look up at her. “Lance tell me what is wrong! Are you hurt? What happened?” She asked sounding like a worried mother.
Lance’s only response was a slow shake of the head.
Allura recognising the panic attack hugged him in her strong arms humming a calming tune.
After a while the tears stopped and Lance found himself able to breath normally again. He stayed in Allura’s arms letting her rock him gently back and forth closing his eyes and listening to the calming sound.
“Pretty song” Lance whispered.
“My farther would sing it to me when I was young.” Allura answered a note of pain to her voice. “Ready to tell me what’s wrong?”
Lance shook his head earning him a sigh from the princess.
“Well…is there anything I can do to help?
Lance was quiet for a moment “do you have any makeup I could borrow?” He asked nervously playing with the hem of the blanket.
“Of course. But I do not understand, you often boast about how perfect your skin is.”
A bitter laugh escaped Lance’s throat. “My skins ugly.”
Allura was so surprised by this answer she pulled back just to try and see if the blue paladin was joking. He had to be joking…right?
“Lance why would you think that?” She asked gently.
Lance slowly, very slowly looked up. The blanket falling off his head and showing his face to the older woman.
Allura couldn’t stop the gasp that escaped her lips as she stared at Lance.
His face began to crumble “I knew it! I knew this would happen!” He sobbed curling in on himself.
“No no lance I didn’t mean anything bad!” Allura rambled quickly. “It’s just I did not realise humans also had marks of beauty like Altean’s.”
Lance sniffed looking up at her “marks of beauty?” He asked.
“Yes” she tapped the pink marking on her cheek “on Altea it was a sign of beauty to have markings such as yours on your face. They called them marks of the Drioborn bug… I believe you have something similar on Earth. Butterfly I think they are called.”
Lance smiled for a moment “yeah butterfly is right.”
After his little heart to heart with Allura, Lance though still self conscious didn’t outright hate his skin anymore. He borrowed her makeup as to feel more confident but eventually he opened up to the team allowing himself to love who he is as much as his team does.

Being part of the 'Sad Breakfast Club' would include:

Originally posted by theblueandsilver

• girl’s nights with Betty and Veronica when you get to relax and talk about normal teenage things

• helping solve the murder of Jason Blossom

• letting Betty run her articles by you and always coming to you for advice when she’s unsure

• Archie messaging you at 3am because he just thought of a song lyric and he’s not sure if it’s genius or he’s just really tired

• going shopping with Veronica but you know it makes her feel like everything’s the same as it used to be

• going on dinner dates with Kevin because he likes to dress up and just talk to you, it makes him feel grounded

• sorting information into folders for Jughead’s novel because he doesn’t keep it organised

• he l o v e s you for it

• meeting Archie for late night runs because you don’t want him to be alone

• hanging out at Pop’s practically everyday

• somehow you end up paying for everyone’s shakes half the time

• cheering them all on at their respective events i.e. Betty giving her speech, Archie and Veronica singing/performing together

• going to homecoming with all of them because you we’re the only one without a date and that wasn’t good enough

• so you showed up with five

• Veronica and Betty encouraging you to try out for the Vixens and buying you cupcakes to celebrate when you’re officially put on the squad

• letting Archie teach you how to play football because he’s nervous about his big games

• having a love/hate relationship with Cheryl

• inviting all of them over for sleepovers when your parents are out of town

• forgetting the world and all it’s bullshit when you’re together for a night, watching movies and eating pizza

• playing spin the bottle except whoever it lands on has to pay for takeout

• all of them ganging up to interrogate every single boy/girl who asks you out

• “I just want to know who thinks they’re good enough for you?”

• everyone protesting when Reggie asks you out

• everyone except Kevin, who loves to hear about your romantic exploits

• “of course I’m interested in your love life! You’re the only one who is fishing outside of our sad little murder mystery pond.”

• “well… That’s true.”

• helping them all when they need help,even though it gets hard sometimes

• constantly having to fix problems between your friends because none of them communicate properly

• being the first to find out about Kevin and Joaquin because you went to look for him after he was gone for half an hour just to get snacks at the drive-in

• being the first to find out about Betty and Jughead because Betty let it slip on the phone to you ten minutes after they kissed

• being the first to find out about Veronica and Archie because of a series of drunk dial voice mails he didn’t think he was intoxicated enough to send

• “GINGER JESUS GOES IN FOR THE KILL! TARGET: LODGE”

• “Y/N guess whooooo kissed Ronnieeee?”

• receiving another message the next morning from the boy himself

• “can you die from embarrassment?”

• being the resident cheerleader, making them smile even when they think they don’t want to

• somehow ending up with five valentines gifts because you deserve it more than anyone

• “I don’t know what we’d do without you,Y/N.”

• “Probably starve seeing as I pay for everything we eat.”

• “It’s fair! We let the bottle decide!”

• constantly trying to hold it together because you don’t want to let anyone down

• all of them being there, in their own way, when you finally breakdown

• becoming your own little family, because everything else is a mess

By Way of Spontaneity (Part 6)

Summary: On a whim, Bucky declares you to be his girlfriend to his grandma and mother. They’re eager to meet you and he asks you to pretend to be with him for just one dinner with his family. But is that really all?

Word Count: 717

Warnings: None.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

A/N: You’re allowed to come scream to me in my inbox.

Originally posted by dailyteamcap

Despite feeling a little down by Tony’s cold attitude towards you, you couldn’t help but to smile as Bucky knocked on your door, his face hidden by a large bouquet of flowers.

“W-What?” you gasped out.

He peered from behind them before lowering them, his grin wide and elated. “Wanted to say thanks.”

“Bucky!”

He shoved them forward and into your arms. “We’re kinda late, though, so—”

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The Bronze

Summary: You and the team decide to trick Bucky and Steve into watched The Bronze for your movie night. Bucky teases you about your crush on Lance Tucker after noting your reaction to the sex scene.

Warningsteasing, masturbation, smut (reader receiving oral sex)

A/N: Wanted to write a Bucky smut. What’s new? Totes not my best work but I wanted to write a short fic for you guys because I haven’t in a while.

Originally posted by vintagefangirll

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No One’s Roasted Like Gaston.[Oneshot].

no one writes FANFICS LIKE EMILEE.

Originally posted by luuuuuke-evans

Title: No One’s Roasted Like Gaston.
Pairing: Implied!- Gaston x Reader.
Rating: T.
Words: 2,231.
Summary: Gaston thought he was undeniable to women and even some men. Has he finally found his match?


There was nothing particularly notable about the early mornings, at least, not anymore. The sky above was it usual mixture of pinks, purples and some lighter hues of blue as the sun rose and lit up the clouds, giving them a rather unique looking glow. There was a small wind, but not chilling, and brought in the lingering scent of meadows and trees. You got used to those aspects and they slowly became the norm. You began to not notice them at all, and remarked them as being every day life. If one wanted to really shake things up in a morning routine, they would count the cobblestones that made up each walkway in the village. But, that’s the thing. No one ever wanted to shake things up. They wanted things to stay the same for that is the way they had been living for as long as anyone could remember. With change came the unprecedented fear that something terrible would happen as a result.

It was the hustle and bustle of such a small village did leave one breathless and forgetful on occasion if you didn’t pay attention to where you were going and why you were going there in the first place. If one was aimlessly walking in the morning time while the sun peaked into the valley, one might be trampled by those selling goods and merchandise. Some too expensive, and some not expensive enough and left you wondering whether you had been scammed or if you had gotten a good deal.

Aimless and mindless were surely your vibe this beautiful morning. You had nowhere to be, nothing to do or see and so you actually took your time to walk through the village during one of the busiest times of day. There was a variant of smells, some of which you happened to thoroughly enjoy. Fresh bread, springtime air, a small caddy on the corner before the village square that was selling freshly picked roses. Contrary to the flowers smelling divine, the actual vibrancy of the colors caught your attention and dwindled you to stay and admire them for longer than you had intended . Vivid reds, pastel pinks, yellow whites. It looked as if these flowers belonged immortalized in a painting for the entire world to enjoy.

Smiling at the vendor who was a few feet to your right, you plucked a light, dusty pink rose out of one of the buckets full of water. It dripped down your fingers onto your wrist causing a small shudder to shoot down your arm. Miraculously, it looked as if a skilled painter had dipped their brush in the sky during dusk, mustered up enough color to splotch onto the petals of the flower. Some parts were darker than others, but all around, it was a very delicate and soft appearing flower.

“Beautiful.” You could hear someone behind you say. And without the need to turn around and see the speaker, you were already well aware of who it was. Probably looking at himself in the reflection of a window again, you snickered quietly. It was as if you could see the bright red uniform from your peripheral vision and it was already giving you a headache. Setting the flower back into the metallic bucket, you gave the vendor one more glance over and polite smile before drawing your attention to your left, with the unsuccessful hope of getting out of there without Gaston being connected at your hip.

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for you pt. 7 [m]

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Genre: Badboy!Taehyung, angst

Word Count: 5.3k

Originally posted by vminv

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

Six Months Later

You walked down the hallway of the academic building slowly, the weight of the paper in your bag causing you to drag your feet. Each footstep bringing more and more uncertainty about the next chapter of your life. You noticed that the door to your professor’s office was locked, and a small sigh of relief escaped your lips.

You didn’t want to have to explain to him how all your interviews had turned to dead ends. You didn’t want to have to explain how you were still going to be stuck in this town. Stuck in the memories of the past year when all you wanted to do was move forward. There was nothing that you wanted more than leaving. If he could leave, so could you. But instead you had gotten hired at the coffee shop in which you first met him. Left to repeat the same memories over and over again.

And as you left the building for the last time, you didn’t feel any different. The emptiness that had filled your chest the day he left was still there. You held your phone up to your ear, the familiar number having been dialed like clockwork. “We are sorry, but the number you are trying to reach is no longer in service.” seared through your ears after the first dial tone.

You kicked at a rock while waiting to cross the street. There was no reason for you to continue to call that number. But there was still a large part of you that hoped he would come back. That when you called his voice would saying hello on the other end. But no one had heard from him. Not you. Not the boys. It was like he had erased himself from your universe.

Taehyung crept into your mind during your most vulnerable moments. Like when the sun hit your skin in the middle of the afternoon, reminding you of the hours you would spend sitting next to him in the front seat of his car. Driving the two of you around while blasting old music and singing along so out of tune that everyone else would stare at you from their cars.

You missed him when you couldn’t get a jar open, not because he was strong enough to open them. But because you would hunch over in fits of laughter as you watched him turn red in the face while trying to open it. He wasn’t much of a muscle pig, but you thought his effort was the cutest.

He was in the worn out t-shirt hidden in the back of your closet. A piece of clothing you didn’t know you had until your nose caught the smell of his cologne the first time Mina came over to your apartment to do your laundry since you hadn’t left your bed in weeks. You had her put it down, worried that if she held it for too long you would forget what he smelled like when he held you.

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