My dad is currently being a jerk, so do you have any cute Bruce being a cool batdad headcanons? Thanks a lot. :3
- At some point Bruce decided that carrying his smaller children around is basically another form of weight-lifting (and therefore something that he should definitely do), which is convenient considering that Damian kinda likes to hang out on Bruce’s shoulders. The high ground is tactically advantageous, you know, so it’s good strategy. Also it’s really easy to kick people in the head from that height, so there’s that too.
- Every time Bruce says something even vaguely positive about another kid, his children start in with the adoption jokes. Tim carries around a blank adoption form so he can sarcastically offer it to his dad at regular intervals. Every once in awhile, Bruce pretends he’s really considering it, just to freak them out. They’re like… reasonably sure he’s kidding, but also? They’ve been burned before.
- Ninja: a “training” game with very simple rules: get to Bruce while he’s not expecting it, without letting him see you. Tag him and you win. Nobody has ever won Ninja, even though they’ve been playing it since Dick was little. Bruce always catches them; he won’t, however, just end the game when he does. He always waits until the laaaast possible second. He thinks it’s funny.
- Bruce, calmly, from the couch: I really would have recommended an attack from above
- The small child underneath the couch: NOOOOO I WAS SO CLOSE
- Bruce, straight-faced: You sure were
- Y'all know those Facebook games where it’s like “type @b and the first name to appear is your new dad?” The entire city of Gotham tags Bruce as their new dad. Congrats, Bruce.