Andre Burakovsky, Washington Capitals “Trotsy tried to get Burakovsky to be Burt. We all call him Burracuda. Everybody calls him Burracuda. Nobody calls him Burt. I haven’t heard one player call him Burt.” - Eric Fehr (Meanwhile, Burakovsky says that nobody on the team calls him Burracuda).
INSTEAD OF GENE AND SIMMONS HAVING WEIRD GRIF TENSION
TEMPLE AND SIMMONS LITERALLY FIGHTING OVER GRIF
LIKE, IT DOESN’T EVEN HAVE TO BE IN A ROMANTIC WAY?? TEMPLE JUST MEETS THIS DUDE AND HE REMINDS HIM SO MUCH OF HIS BEST FUCKING FRIEND AND HE’S JUST LIKE, “DIBS. I JUST CALLED DIBS. THIS IS MY FRIEND NOW.” IN TRUE CHURCH-ESQUE FASHION.