this is never not funny!

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lmao yo i’m convinced melania just tryna outlive this man and collect them billions at this point

  • <p> <b>dreamworks:</b> so we could make keith's birthday either october 22nd or 23rd<p/><b>jeremy shada:</b> the 23rd<p/><b>dreamworks:</b> lol why<p/><b>jeremy shada, closing 38 tabs on zodiac compatibility:</b> no reason<p/></p>
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I’m Taehyung

Musicals By Their Best Insults
  • <p> <b><p></b> <b>Phantom of the Opera:</b> "Carlotta must be taught to act, not her normal trick of strutting round the stage. Our Don Juan must lose some weight- it's not healthy in a man of Piangi's age. And my managers must learn that their place is in an office, not the arts."<p/><b>Les Misérables:</b> "Master of the house? Isn't worth my spit! Comforter, philosopher and lifelong shit! Cunning little brain, regular Voltaire. Thinks he's quite a lover but there's not much there What a cruel trick of nature landed me with such a louse God knows how I've lasted living with this bastard in the house!"<p/><b>Wicked:</b> "I hope you're happy. I hope you're happy, too. I hope you're proud how you would grovel in submission to feed your own ambition!"<p/><b>Hamilton:</b> "Sittin’ there useless as two shits. Hey, turn around, bend over, I’ll show you where my shoe fits!" & "SIT DOWN JOHN YOU FAT MOTHERFUCKER!<p/><b>Heathers:</b> (<i>this entire musical is an insult</i>) "Freak! Slut! Burnout! Bug-eyes! Poser! Lard-ass!" & "SHUT UP HEATHER!"<p/><b>Love Never Dies:</b> (<i>this entire musical is an insult to humanity</i>) "Look at you, deep in debt. Stinking drunk, pitiful [...] Look at you, foul as sin. Hideous, horrible." & "Beauty sometimes goes unseen. We can't all be like Christine."<p/><b>Grease:</b> "Look at me, I'm Sandra Dee. Lousy with virginity. Won't go to bed 'til I'm legally wed. I can't; I'm Sandra Dee"<p/></p>

prospurr  asked:

its the dead of night and all i can think of in borderlands au is mccree and hanzo coming across a baby skag, (and this is me projecting a childhood memory) hanzo being like '... it's... kind of cute.' and mccree spending 20+ minutes after that making a >:0 face at him

oh my god dhgjdfgjfgjdf