this is me wishing you happy holidays

Seriously though, the number of grown adults who pitch a WHINY HISSY FIT when I tell them that they can’t take an animal home is astounding.

My favorite one from this holiday season was a man with a young girl (about 5 or 6 years old) and a teenage boy.  The man approaches me and, without me even asking what I can help them with, says:

Man: So we had a goldfish in a bowl and my son changed the food and it died!
Son: (clearly offended, yet texting) It wasn’t MY fault!
Me: Actually the reason it more than likely died is because goldfish REALLY shouldn’t be kept in bowls.
Man: Well it’s a big bowl, like this! (mimes about a gallon-sized bowl shape)
Me: Yeah, that’s actually pretty darn tiny.
Man: Well anyway, we want to get another one.
Girl: I want three!
Me: Unfortunately I can’t sell you a fish today– your setup really isn’t going to work for a goldfish.  You’re going to need at least 10 gallons for just ONE and even then you’re going to have to upgrade within a month or so.  Goldfish really aren’t a beginner fish…

As I say that I brace myself knowing what’s coming up.  Almost every time I refuse sale of a fish, I get the same reaction: outrage and demanding to talk to the manager, etc.

Man: Well I HAVE a tank.
Me: …I really don’t feel comfortable selling you the fish since I really feel like you’re not going to give it the proper care it needs for a long and healthy life.
Man: What?! I said I have a tank!  Why won’t you sell me the fish?!
Me: How big is the tank?
Man: 10 gallons!
Me: I still don’t feel comfortable selling you the fish.  I’m going to have to refuse the sale, I’m very sorry.
Man: What do you mean?!
Me: I’m not going to sell you fish today, I’m very sorry.
Man: I demand to talk to your manager!!!
Me: -points to nametag- Sir, I AM the manager.
Man: -takes a full pause, not expecting this-
Man: So you’re not going to sell me a fish, really?  These 15-cent fish that you feed to turtles, you’d sell it for that but not to me??
Me: If you had the setup for it, I would be more than happy to.
Man: I told you I have a tank!
Me: You told me you had your fish in a bowl.  I honestly believe you are just saying this to get the fish at this point, sir, I’m sorry.
Man: What do you I have to do, bring in a picture to prove I have it??
Me: -calling his bluff in a cheerful tone-  Absolutely!  I would love to see pictures of your tank and I would be more than happy to help you stock it after seeing your setup!
Man: (He takes another full pause) I’m going to call the company and COMPLAIN about you!  This is ridiculous, what’s the number to complain??
Me: I’m afraid I don’t know that off the top of my head sir.
Man: You don’t know the company number???
Me: No sir, but I believe it’s on our website.

While this was going on, the teenage boy was in the reptiles aisle texting and the girl was watching the turtles swim around in our tank nearby.  The man then grabs his daughter by the hand and does this in front of other customers:

Man: Let’s go– the lady’s not going to sell us fish.  She’s a MEAN LADY. (he’s staring directly at me as I stand there with no expression on my face)
Girl: Oh we’re not getting fish?  -not even upset-
Man: Yeah because she’s a MEAN LADY. (he says these words at a higher volume and with more emphasis)

He continues to repeat that phrase as he exits down the reptile aisle, making customers uncomfortable and I just shrug and go back to what I was doing before this scene.

An hour later I get a call from corporate.

NC: Hi, this is the national center, we just wanted to ask about the conditions surrounding a complaint we received about you.  A customer has complained that you wouldn’t sell him a fish even after stating he had the correct setup.  We just would like to hear your side of the story.
Me: (I tell him about the fact the guy had a goldfish in a bowl and then changed his story saying he had a tank and that I refused sale because I didn’t feel he was being honest or would care for the animal)
Me: And then he left the store, calling me a “mean lady” several times in a loud voice and said he would call you guys.
NC: Ok Christina, I just wanted to let you know that we agree with you 100% and that you did everything you were supposed to.  We wish you a very happy holiday season and I hope your shift goes well!
Me: Thank you!  You too!

I did a little happy dance and told the other manager on duty, who didn’t believe me when I said the company would have my back on the issue (he thought the company would bend over backwards for the guy and it would bite me in the butt)

BUT WAIT IT GETS BETTER

The next day I come in for work at 2PM to find out from my general manager that the guy had called the store (after the nat center told him I was correct, mind you) to complain about me and saying that my behavior was “irresponsible” and that I was “unprofessional” and that I should be reprimanded or fired.

My general manager just said “Well I’m sorry to hear that sir but you see, she has NEVER gotten a complaint as long as she has worked for the company and the national center has already stated that she has done everything according to policy.  Sorry you feel that way, man, but there’s nothing I’m going to do against her in this situation.”

Made my week.

So, yeah, my company defended the life of a 15-cent “feeder” goldfish.

I’m pretty damn happy about that.

Empowerment Spell Bottle

My craft is quite personal. I just follow my instincts and choose things that seem to call to me at the time, so you won’t find me posting spells very often. But as I was making up this spell bottle I thought I’d post it to inspire others to create something similar or to add a little magick to their holiday season.

This bottle contains:

-water (from my home)
-a few drops of sweet orange essential oil (to keep my family close)
-lavender buds (for less stress)
-rose buds (for love)
-bay leaf (for prosperity)
-catnip (for my kitty)
-sea salt (for luck in my craft)
-dandelion (so my wishes come true)

While placing this bottle under the light of the holiday full moon, I will chant:

With this elixir I ask the Earth
to be with me now
and in this year’s new birth.

I plan to dab the charged water on my wrists and behind my ears throughout the year to empower me and remind me of my goals from the previous year.

Wishing you all Happy Holidays, and a lovely new year (:

anonymous asked:

My partner is set to deploy next month. This will be our 3rd deployment since we got together. It has me thinking about Sterek Military fics. Marines, Army, Navy, Navy Seal, Spec Ops, whatever I will take them all. Bless you and this blog for getting me through many lonely nights.

Awwww, sending your partner good vibes and well wishes!  Tried to find you some completed fics with happy endings bb, hope they help <3  -Emmy

Originally posted by super-hoech

I’m Coming Home by redhoodedwolf 

(1,031 I Teen I Complete)  *military!Stiles

Prompt from Tumblr:
I’m not sure if your still doing prompts… but if you are I would love you forever if you could write a Military!AU, where Stiles surprises Derek be coming back early!! Very FLUFFY!!!

Everyday Will Be Like a Holiday by wirewrappedlily 

(1,395 I General I Complete)  *soldier!Derek

When Stiles woke at ten the next morning, Derek was curled tight around him, Erica’s head in the dip of Derek’s waist, and Isaac’s thin form thrown over their legs, Scott lying around both Stiles and Isaac while Lydia slept in as small a ball as possible on Stiles’s chest, Boyd’s hand on her head as if she’d had a nightmare. Stiles smiled to himself, going back to staring at Derek’s sleeping features. The curve of his eyelashes and the relaxed shape of his mouth. He wanted to trace his finger over the line of Derek’s nose, leave hickies over the straight edge of Derek’s jaw. It was new and old and so good Stiles wanted to cry.

Derek was home.

Coming Home For Christmas by Nerdy_fangirl_57 

(1,780 I General I Complete) *soldier!Derek, married!sterek

Stiles was trying to be the best dad he could be for his little girl after Derek was drafted into the military 3 months ago. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel like crying when Alex tells him that all she wants for Christmas is for Santa to bring her papa back home. 

What a Difference a Day Makes by the_gramophone 

(1,888 I General I Complete)   *soldier!Stiles

Derek is struggling not to feel lonely this Valentine’s Day, but he does his best to put on a brave and happy face for his daughter. Both their days take a turn for the better when they get an unexpected surprise.

Home Without a Heart by 138andcounting 

(2,145 I Not Rated I Complete)   *marine!Derek

Derek leave the Marines due to an injury, and finds himself in a small town in California, Beacon Hills. Not being able to stop helping others, he joins the police, where he meets 18-year-old Stiles Stilinski. A year of dating later, they moved to NY for Stiles to go to college. After dating for two years, Derek get’s an unexpected visitor.

Coming Home by Ella Dean Pendragon 

(2,277 I General I Complete)  *soldier!Derek

It’s been three hundred and seventy six days since he left and Stiles has been living each day as it comes but all that is about to change. Non werewolf AU. Army AU, Sterek, Slash. Other pairings Scisaac, Dethan and Lydia/Aiden.

A Soldier Surprise by Eburn 

(2,765 I General I Complete)  *soldier!Derek

The one where Derek is a Soldier and Stiles is at Uni, and they’re engaged. Derek surprises Stiles by coming home early.

Traveling Soldier by Angelwithwingsoffire 

(3,006 I Not Rated I Complete)  *soldier!Derek

Stiles works in a diner when one day a soldier walks in, dressed in army greens and sits down at one of Stiles’s booths. They end up talking and soon enough Stiles is sending letters off to one Sergeant Derek Hale, until one day, the letters stop.

Thank God Your Heart is Too Close by hoars 

(3,469 I Not Rated I Complete)  *soldier!Derek

There’s a boy, (“Fuck you, dude. I’m seventeen. Not fifteen.” Stiles laughs in his memory) waiting for him back home.

Coming Home by WyldeWombat (orphan_account) 

(3,766 I Teen I Complete)  *soldier!Derek

Derek joined the military over four years ago, and Stiles doesn’t get to see his mate very much. In fact, he hasn’t seen Derek in over a year. Little does he know, Derek is coming home.

In the Air, On Land, On Sea by enthroned 

(6,443 I General I Complete)   *marine!Derek, marine!Stiles

In which Derek is a marine on his way home.  He meets Stiles, a marine on his way to war.

Marine Sergeant Hale by Angelwithwingsoffire 

(6,258 I Not Rated I Complete)  *marine!Derek

Stiles has been bullied for years and it gets worse when the Sheriff is deployed one last time. One day, in the middle of the daily beating, a Marine comes to his rescue. A very hot and muscular Marine who also happens to be in uniform. And unbeknownst to Stiles, they’ve met before. Stiles can’t remember but Derek remembers it all.

If You’re Not Here to Turn the Lights Off (I Can’t Sleep) by losingmyangelgrace 

(7,234 I Explicit I Complete)  *marine!Derek, teacher!Stiles

“Honey! I’m home!” Stiles shouted into the empty apartment as he moved quickly through to the kitchen, dumping his backpack onto bench before crossing to the fridge and crossing off another day on the calendar. A month and a half. That was how long was left until Derek came home, until he was safe. Everyday felt like a lifetime to Stiles.

Grace - Prologue by Venchaser 

(9,655 I Explicit I Complete)  *historical au, WWII au, soldier!Derek, doctor!Stiles

Twoshot - Prologue (Complete) . It is the 1939, the world is on the brink of a second World War. Stiles is the son of a wealthy high ranking ministry official. His friend and childhood protector Derek Hale is off to the same medical school as he is, with the financial help of his own father, something Stiles is not too happy about, though he won’t admit it to himself that there might be feelings involved. Yet.

The Last Time by clawstoagunfight

(10,874 I Explicit I Complete)  *Soldier!Stiles

Stiles is leaving in the morning and Derek can’t find the words to say how he feels. Instead, he shows him.

Secrets of Suburbia by GiaUrsula 

(17,338 I Mature I Complete)  *historical au, Soldier!Derek

Lydia Martin was the Queen Bee of Beacon Hills so it was her job to welcome her husband’s nephew, Derek, and his new wife into the neighbourhood. Derek has returned home after service in Korea to settle down and marry his sweetheart, Gen, who Lydia becomes fast friends with. But after stumbling upon Derek cheating on Gen, she isn’t sure what to think. But who was the man she saw him with? Who is Stiles?

Air Mail by Handsofred 

(20,229 I Not Rated I Complete)  *soldier!derek, dad!derek, teacher!stiles

‘’Oh my god’’ Stiles breathed out as heavy booted footsteps faded away down the hall. ‘’oh my god’’

‘’Stiles?’’ Allison asked as he scrambled around the desk searching for the last letter before he was thrusting it at their faces.

‘’It’s him…my soldier…it’s him, it’s Mattie’s dad’’ He told them, his eyes wide as Allison took the letter from him, ‘’oh my god, oh my god and I fainted in front of him…oh Jesus Christ’’

Protecting Home by countrygirlsfun 

(38,400 I Mature I Complete)   *soldier!Stiles, Teacher!Derek

Stiles Stilinski is now an ex-army sniper and engaged to kindergarten teacher Derek Hale. All he wants is to leave his military service and experiences behind him so he can move on and build his life with Derek.

But it isn’t always easy when the battlefield follows you home.

I’ll Be Seeing You by thepsychicclam 

(81,489 I Explicit I Complete)  *soldier!derek, WWII au, historical au

In the summer of 1941, with the country on the brink of war, diner waiter Stiles meets Derek Hale, an army soldier just passing through Beacon Hills.

❤️

Happy holidays!

This year for me has been a very special year, I have achieved goals that I can’t even imagine being able to reach, not only about my works but also in real life. I still have a lot to improve, but for me it is already a great start. But the thing that filled me with pride is that I managed to inspire people to improve through my work, to be determined and never stop when faced with difficulties. And this is also thanks to you who have supported me since I started, that not only have driven me to continue but have also helped me improve. And I know that I thank you very often, this is because I’m really grateful to all this, and I feel that what I realize, what I write is not enough to express it. Well, I conclude by making you my warmest wishes for happy holidays and making a summary of all the projects I’ve done this year! 

anonymous asked:

so mothers day is coming up in a couple weeks, so i was wondering what is the most memorable (best worst doesnt matter) mother's day the pta moms have had

what are you all getting me for mothers day btw? hmm? (jk!!)

Hakeyon - when hyuk wished him a happy mothers day 4 months after mothers day

Jin - when jimin got him a cake with his face on it and then the two of them ate it together while holding hands 

Jeonghan - when vernon said “happy mothers day” and jeonghan was like wow! thanks! but vernon was like “im not talking to you, im talking to joshua our real mother.” 

Kihyun - when hyungwon actually remembered to thank him for dinner and kihyun was like ,,,,,,omg you’re learning your manners and teared up,,,,,,but hyungwon was like lol no this is a holiday where im forced to be nice to you. chill

Suho - when tao posted a meme about mothers day and suho liked it and tao blocked him 2 seconds after 

Winter starters because I still can't help myself 🌨❄️🌧

“I’ve never been ice skating before…”

“I hate winter.”

“It’s supposed to snow today!”

“We’re snowed in…”

“We can spend Christmas alone together if you want.”

“What do you want for [holiday celebration]?”

“Santa just scares me…”

“Do we HAVE to watch Elf again?”

“Hot chocolate?”

“Bring a jacket!”

“I wish it was summer…”

“The power’s out.”

“That’s the dumbest looking snowman I’ve ever seen.”

“Here, take my jacket.”

“This weather is depressing.”

“Happy holidays!”

This isn’t really relevant to anything art related but I want to say that if you don’t have anyone to wish a happy Father’s Day to, reach out to your close friends, family, and the other people in your life that have been a guiding hand to you. It doesn’t have to be your biological dad, but tell someone who has been just as good to you as a father could be that you love and appreciate them!

Oh, and one more thing. I don’t feel like this gets brought up very often, but for those of you who have strained relationships with your fathers or father figures, hang in there. If you’re trying to repair a relationship, if you’re trying to cut ties, or even if you’re just trying to get to the next day and don’t know whats ahead, hang in there. Take a step towards a change or don’t, but don’t let this holiday get you down. Things will get better in time, trust me. Don’t be ashamed to reach out and talk to someone if you need it.

A Blind Path Home, part 3

Steve Rogers x Reader

A/N: I obviously took some liberties with the storyline, but I tried keeping it as true as possible to the canon history. No beta used this time around, so excuse my mistakes.

Summary: It started with a blind date. A date you had skipped out on, but fate had led you right to the man you stood up. Steve Rogers, a man small in stature but big in heart. A chance meeting set everything in motion, but decades later when he is unfrozen, he has been told you have died. But when a mission to retrieve Hydra plans turned up some interesting information, Steve’s left to wonder whether you are still alive. Or is this all just false hope?

Masterlist (if it works - links have been shity lately)

Keep reading

Well, I failed my challenge this month, the flu knocked me down and it was just impossible to do anything except sleep ! : /
Here is the only sketch I draw this month and sadly this will be my last drawing of 2016.
I wish you a happy Holiday Season, see you in 2017 :)

10

To every person I can reach with this,

I wish each and everyone of you a huge MERRY CHRISTMAS from the bottom of my heart. ❤️🎄
MAY ALL YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE. 💖

This year brought so many changes for me, I can hardly imagine how it used to be before.

I’ve been on Tumblr and Twitter for about half a year and I’ve already met so many WONDERFUL and HEARTWARMING people here! 💕💕💕
I’ve found so many friends, supporters and followers and I wouldn’t like to miss a single one of them. You guys are AMAZING!!

Most of all, I’d like to thank @barakei84. I know she would deny it (😉), but she’s one of the most heartwarming and beautiful persons I’ve ever met.

And my last and probably biggest THANK YOU goes to the person I’ve had the pleasure to draw in this about 35 drawings - MR. MICHAEL FASSBENDER. Without him, I wouldn’t have met all those nice people. I’ve spent hours, days and weeks with “him” in my room and I’ve never had so much fun. 😄 I’ve practised and learned so much by trying to draw him in so many of his wonderful movies. I’ve I could make a wish for Christmas, I’d like him to see my work. Not only for me, but also for all of his and my fans, who helped me out with advices, pics and encouraging messages. I don’t know where I would be without you. ❤️❤️❤️

I am sorry for this very huge post, but I think there should always be space for a THANK YOU!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO ALL OF YOU! 💗💗💗

@klassyfassy @michaelfassyfastbender @michaelfassbenderisbeautiful @michaelfassbenderonline @magnetobsessed79 @soulfulmags @bacooperworld @tara-ngx @mrassbender @fassbender-m @fassmebender @hughxjackman @tedystaleva @fuckyeahfassbender @fuckyeahfassavoy @fuckyeahcharlesanderik @fassandavoy @0phei @messedup4good @dearfassbender @fassbender-x-mcavoy @fassbender-mcavoyobsessed @cherikinlove @fassynated @fassyforever @thatfassy @kiss-my-fass @fassysource @shadow-of-cherik @magneto-was-right @magneto-was-left @charles-francis-lehnsherr @xavierstea @cumbermelikecrazy @realfassfans @fassinatedhiddlestoner @fassytheshark @fassythelegend @lenaoffassy @lokimaxiejackie @mcfassytime @mcfassy-hiddlesbatch @chookier @ellatheolivemoth @glendathegoodone

Hello! This is secret santa for @mellifluousbable!

Their request was for “ereri fireside chats; Eren, Levi, and friends have a secret santa gift exchange” and well… here you have the precious boys exchanging gifts by the fireplace with Hanji and Armin (and let’s just pretend that Mikasa and the others are grabbing drinks and food from the kitchen or something, haha).

I hope this is to your liking, and I wish you and everyone a warm, fun, safe, and wonderful holiday season!

MERRY CHRISTMAS! ♡

Christmas Miracle

(Sebastian Stan x Reader)

A/N: Guess who’s back, back again! Hello everyone I know I haven’t posted in months and I am so sorry! I have been so overwhelmed with school and everything that I’ve had no free time but that’s life. I’m happy to be back, at least for now, and can’t wait to talk to you guys again. I wish you all a happy and safe holiday season, lots of love! (Ps please send me requests!!)

“It’s the most wonderful time of the year!” Sebastian sings joyfully as he prances down the stairs.

You raise your eyes from the newspaper to see your goofball husband posing in front of the breakfast table, dressed in none other than a Santa Suit.

“Hello Mr. Claus, how are the reindeer?” You ask jokingly, playing along with whatever is going on right now.

Sebastian chuckles in his best St. Nick impression, “Well hello there young lady, I heard you’ve been very good this year.”

You simply laugh and shake your head before returning to your bowl of cereal.

“Don’t you remember Y/N?”, Seb questions while removing his curly white beard, “Today’s the day of the neighborhood Christmas party?”

“And you’re playing Santa, I remember now!” You grin reaching out to hold his hand, which was covered by big red glove.

“And I’m playing Santa!” He exclaimed enthusiastically, “I can’t wait to see the looks on the kids faces when I walk in.”

A few hours and a lot of red velvety material later, Sebastian was ready to give the neighborhood kids the best surprise ever. The Christmas party was being held just a couple houses down from yours, so the two of you decided to walk.

“Seb did you feel that?” You gasp looking up at the sky.

“Feel what?” He inquires, his voice muffled slightly from the added facial hair.

“I think it’s snowing”, you whisper as a small snowflake lands on your nose.

“It’s an almost Christmas miracle!” Sebastian laughs as you approach the brightly decorated home.

The minute you walk through the door Sebastian is spotted by young children.

“Oh my goodness Mommy it’s Santa!” One girl exclaims commencing a burst of happiness and chaos from all the others.

You knew from that moment on that Sebastian was no longer yours for the remainder of the evening so you went and spent time with some of the other adults.

“Man he’s really good with kids, you’ve got yourself a keeper Y/n.” Your close friend says as her child sits on your husband’s lap. “Do you two plan on having kids?”

You always get flustered when people ask that question, but tonight was cause for extra flusteredness. Little did anyone know, but the two of you had been trying to get pregnant for months and the pregnancy test you took yesterday came out as positive. You were waiting for the perfect time to tell Sebastian all day, but you had finally decided to tell him after the party. It was getting late and all the kids needed to go to bed, meaning the party had come to a close. ‘Santa’ wished everyone sweet dreams before walking home.

“Seb I have something to tell you.” You state when you’re about halfway home.

“Is everything okay Y/n, what is it?” Sebastian asks you with a worried tone in his voice, stopping to face you while grasping your hands.

“Everything is fine, actually everything is better than fine. We’re finally pregnant!” You exclaim looking into his beautiful eyes.

“Are you serious? I’m going to be a Daddy!” He yells with tears in his eyes, dropping to his knees to kiss your belly after pecking you on the lips.

“I’m very serious, and very excited.” You say happily tearing up as well, helping him back up off the ground.

He can’t wipe the grin off his face the rest of the night, “Now this is an almost Christmas miracle if I’ve ever seen one.”

Terrible Pick-Up Lines Meme
  • "Do you know what would look good on you? Me."
  • "Excuse me, I am about to go home to masturbate and needed a name to go with the face."
  • "Fuck me if I am wrong, but you want to screw me, don't you?"
  • "Hey, want to play house? I could be the door, and you could slam me all night long."
  • "How do you like your eggs: poached, scrambled, or fertilized?"
  • "I do floors, doors, windows, and you."
  • "I wish you were a screen door, so I can slam you all day long."
  • "If I flip a coin, what are the chances of me getting head?"
  • "Is that crotch sweat, or are you just happy to see me?"
  • "If I was a skateboard and you were a ramp, I would grind you all night."
  • "If I was your coworker, I'd sexually harass you."
  • "If your left leg was Thanksgiving and your right leg Christmas, can I visit you between the Holidays?"
  • "I’m tired. You’re tired. Let’s sleep together!"
  • "Let's bypass all the bullshit and just get naked."
  • "Let's have a party and invite your pants to come on down."
  • "Life is like a dick. When it gets hard, 'Fuck it'."
  • "My face is leaving in fifteen minutes. Be on it."
  • "Remember my name. you'll be screaming it later."
  • "Roses are red, violets are blue. I like spaghetti, let's go screw."
  • "That dress looks very becoming on you. Of course, if I were on you, I'd be coming, too."
  • "Wanna play some football? We can both be skins."
  • "What are you doing tonight? Besides me?"
  • "Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under."
  • "You are what you eat, and tonight I want to be you."
  • "You must be a cold shower, because I'd love to be inside of you."
  • "You must not have air conditioning because I'm your fan and you're turning me on."
  • "You remind me of my pink toe; you're small, you're cute, and I'm probably going to bang you on my coffee table later tonight."
  • "You wanna go skinny dipping in my water bed?"