this is lame and rather uninteresting

hi girls, this is what i want for you when you are open to getting into a relationship with a guy. i want you to set the lame boys free. i want you to not be afraid of singleness. i want you to build powerfully fulfilling friendships. i want you to see right through the nonsense so you don’t waste a single minute with a lame guy that thinks you should feel honored to have a chance with him. i want you to stop being magnetized to the needy whiney boys as well as the self-absorbed ones. i want you to not put up with emotional whip-lash. what’s so strange about girls getting called “moody” or “crazy’ is that it’s usually after the girl gets fed up with the guy not knowing how to communicate, not being honest about who he is or what he wants, and doing that lame up-and-down of whining when he feels neglected and then acting like you’re clingy as soon as you give him your attention. when you’re ready to be in a relationship, look for your equal. you don’t need to be someone’s mama. you don’t need to rearrange yourself to fit into anyone’s life. compromise comes after commitment, not before, and you don’t need to commit your awesome self to anyone who critiques anything about you. no guy has any business giving a review of who you are. if he doesn’t like who you are, then he shouldn’t still be hanging around. if a boy ever makes you feel insecure, uninteresting, or over the top, tell him bye. there’s a difference between being picky and having standards for yourself. this is what i want for you–to learn and value yourself, to share moments with people who are kind and make you feel safe and appreciated, to explore the topics and places that make you feel passionate and purposeful about living, and to not waste your time with any lame boy because you fall into the misconception that having a potential love interest is the key to happiness, or that it’s better to have some mediocre guy rather than no guy. learn yourself so you can trust yourself so you can love yourself by knowing what you want and knowing when someone isn’t a good fit for the kind of life and love you want and deserve to cultivate. the kind of partnership you deserve has no business letting lame guys overstay their welcome when there are so many wonderful, loving men out there that want the same simple, beautiful partnership that you do. let the lame boys go so they can mature and figure out who they are so they can become more emotionally secure and mentally available. you can be gracious and realize that they’re still figuring it out, but that doesn’t mean you need to keep them around while they do. no more whip-lash, no more games, no more boring, confusing, frustrating flings. that’s what i want for you. 

L, From Her, To Her