this is just so fascinating and so heartbreaking

anonymous asked:

!!! I didnt know you liked documentaries! i loooove them and im always looking for good true crime ones. would it be too much to ask if you could recomend me some good documentaries you like? <3

this is the hardest but the best question ever. i’ve been musing over it for the last several days, and i finally just decided to sit down and make out a list. this is by no means a complete list, nor is it a ‘best of’ list. just some that i wanna rec because i think they’re awesome. or at least, the subject is fascinating, and so the annoying narrator/bad quality/etc is worth enduring. let’s go!

♥ autopsy (tv series) - if you have hbo go, it’s better to watch them there because the quality is a lot better, but this is a link to a youtube playlist of episodes. autopsy is a show about (you guessed it) autopsies, but each episode is themed and focuses on several interesting stories about deaths/murders where the cases were solved through forensic evidence found during the autopsies. michael baden is the forensic pathologist who has done several of the autopsies, and he’s the host of the show. i could watch this every single day for the rest of my life. (expect lots and lots of gore)

♥ paradise lost: the child murders at robin hood hills - another thing i watched on hbo go, but here’s a link to a yt vid (there are two other parts to this doc; they should show up in the related videos to the right). this is the story of the west memphis three and the murders of three little boys in arkansas in 1993. it’s a fascinating, heartbreaking, and unbearably frustrating story about the conviction of 3 teenage boys for those murders. there’s another doc called west of memphis that documents the events that occur after paradise lost concludes. i think west of memphis is my favorite of them all. god, what a fucking story. (graphic crime scene photos and video of three little boys.)

♥ mommy dead and dearest - i just watched this doc today on youtube, but hbo already found it and took it down. SO! you can watch it on hbo/hbo go, but because it’s so new, i doubt it’ll be anywhere else for a good while. it’s the story of dee dee and gypsy rose blancharde, a mother and daughter in a toxic, manipulative relationship that is one of the worst cases of munchausen by proxy ever documented, and one that ends in murder.

♥ thin blue line - a doc made in 1988 that digs into the wrongful conviction of a guy named randall adams who ends up on death row for something he didn’t do. it set a precedence for the importance and influence of crime docs. because of this documentary, the case got reopened.

♥ the keepers - another new doc, but this one’s on netflix. it’s a docuseries that follows the story of the murder of a nun, sister cathy cesnik, in 1969, and the unbelievable sequence of events that lead to it. this doc has pedophiles, sociopathic priests, police cover-ups, and a tireless group of retirement-aged women, some of whom are survivors of rape and abuse by the aforementioned priests, who will not rest until sister cathy’s killer is caught.

♥ the witness - on netflix, too. i talked about this one in my last movie post, but it’s the journey of a brother to try and understand what happened the night his sister, kitty genovese, was murdered in nyc in the mid-sixties. it’s absolutely fucking heartbreaking.

♥ cropsey - (i hope this link works??) this is a doc about a boogeyman urban legend on long island. the reason it’s interesting is because the doc is made by two kids who grew up on long island hearing the story, and there’s a really interesting story about an asylum that gets unearthed while they dig around. this guy also made a doc called killer legends which talks about urban legends and the true crimes that may have inspired them. both are really good.

♥ who took johnny? - another one i’ve already recced, but i wanted to put it on this list because it’s a good one. it’s about a boy named johnny gosch who went missing in the early 80s and was never seen again. the pov here is mostly with johnny’s mother, who is still searching for her son. it’s so heartbreaking. </3

♥ most evil (tv series) - i loveeeee this series. dr. michael stone is a psychiatrist who has a ‘scale of evil’ from 1 to 22 where he places different murderers for various reasons, including mental illness, history, and motive. each episode has a theme, and i could seriously watch this show every day forever and ever and ever. <3

♥ karla homolka & paul bernardo aka ken& barbie killers - these two. jesus fucking christ. paul was a serial rapist before he even met karla, and together, they murdered at least 3 girls, including karla’s little sister. the most insane thing? karla basically gets away with it. i can’t watch enough about these two. they’re so fucking horrible.

♥ the black dahlia, aka elizabeth short - okay, i’m in love with betty short, so i’m gonna link to a bunch of docs about her. i don’t have a favorite, and there isn’t one that i would consider definitive. i wish there was more out there, and i wish there was a good doc that had a good budget and a lot of care taken in its creation, but alas. so here are a few docs that at least give you some good info, crime scene pics, and theories:

one | two | three | four

(please come talk to me about elizabeth short. any time. ask me anything. i love her.)

♥ luis garavito aka the beast - ohmygod. luis garavito. colombian serial killer who has admitted to the rape/murder/torture of at least 140 boys, though it could be closer to 300. there have been mass graves of his victims uncovered. what blows my mind is that this happened in the nineties. 

♥ just melvin, just evil - disturbing and sobering doc about a viciously sadistic, horrible pedophile who ruined the lives of so many children in his family. the lives of all his victims were forever changed and ruined by a single man, and what makes this doc so special and painful is that you get to witness them confronting him when they’re grown.

♥ david parker ray, the toy box killer - if you haven’t heard of david parker ray, omfg, are you in for a story. this guy. he built a torture chamber in a trailer outside of his home and kidnapped, raped, and tortured women for years in it. and it all takes place in a tiny place called truth or consequences.

♥ there’s something wrong with aunt diane - a documentary about a car crash in 2009 that resulted in the deaths of 8 people, including 4 children. the events leading up to the crash and the mysteries behind what went on in that car just before and during the crash itself are just… so, so bizarre. a really interesting doc. (graphic crime scene photos at the end)

♥ the boneyard: leonard lake and david ng - just… the story of how the police even found out about these two in the first place is so fucking amazing. what comes out of the ensuing investigation is just staggering. these two fucks tortured and murdered at least eleven people, probably more. and you won’t believe what it takes to get one of them brought to justice (and what happens to the other one).

♥ wild child: the story of feral children - feral children are one of my very, very favorite topics to research. i’m endlessly moved and fascinated and inspired by stories of them. this is a great doc that touches on several instances of foundlings and gives you some names to rush out and do research on and find more docs about. there isn’t enough out there on feral children. not even close.

♥ theresa knorr - okay, i watch a lot of crime docs. a lot. very, very little shocks or phases me at this point. but this woman? holy fucking shit. theresa knorr stuns me. there’s something about women serial killers that fascinates me, and i think it’s that most of them know their victims intimately or are related to them somehow. knorr is the worst. the. worst. what her children have to endure before they’re murdered is unspeakable and beyond what even my warped brain could imagine. my god. 

♥ mary vincent (lawrence singleton) - this is a link to an episode of a show called ‘i survived’ which has two other stories on it, one that’s kinda boring and the other which is almost as astounding as mary’s story. but mary’s story is just… astonishing. she was fifteen when she was picked up as a hitchhiker and raped, dismembered, and thrown over a cliff. and she fucking survived. i love her. i want to hug her.

♥ catching a monster - peter scully - GOD. this fuck. peter scully is the most horrifying human being i’ve ever seen. his story is ongoing and not finished yet, but this doc talks about what he did and how he was finally arrested. scully ran a pedophilic red room/film studio where he tortured, raped, and murdered children for rich people who paid him to do it and film it. just. yeah.

♥ kidnapping of elizabeth smart - mindboggling. just… not only how she was taken, but also why and what happened while she was gone. and how she was found. stockholm syndrome is another thing that fucking fascinates me, and i wish this doc had focused more on that aspect of the story, but i understand why elizabeth is reluctant to discuss it. anyway! such an interesting story.

♥ the murder of james bulger - james bulger was a 2-year-old boy from merseyside who was brutally murdered by two 10-year-old boys. the violence they inflicted on this kid, and the way his body was found is just… a nightmare. there are two docs on this murder that i’ve watched and find interesting in their own rights, so i’m gonna link to both: 

one | two

(after you’re done watching these two, look up the two boys who murdered him and see what they’re up to now. one of them will stun you.)

♥ aileen wuornos - gonna end this with the lady dearest to my heart. i feel such an incredible amount of sympathy and heartbreak for this tragic woman. her life story is almost unbearable, and the journey of her lifelong abuse by men, the series of murders she committed, and how she found love somehow in between all of it will stay with me forever. there are two wonderful documentaries on aileen, both by nick broomfield, and together they tell the whole story, leading up to her execution:

 the selling of a serial killer

 the life and death of a serial killer

this is by no means a (complete) list of my favorite true crime cases! but these are some that i love a whole lot. i hope you find something you like here! ♥

Reasons 03 is a genuinely GOOD SHOW (without added critiques or comparison to BH): 

  • great commentary on racism and imperialism -realistic psychology of characters 
  • is really good with foreshadowing, thematic development, and ambiguity 
  • is extremely nuanced (one second of character content is worth a thousand episodes) 
  • the homunculi origins are damn brilliant -everything is so deep, you can write so much meta on pretty much anything. the symbolism of the homunculi’s sins? the way sloth and lust foil each other and manage to be super feminist and sympathetic villains? the degradation of al’s character until he ends the series with MORE flaws than LESS and how it’s actually BRILLIANT? the rule of entropy and how a pessimistic message becomes so freaking hopeful? 
  • the ending!!! im a sucker for hopeful, “the adventure continues” endings. obviously this is a taste thing, but the 03 ending made me so happy. cos was a satisfying conclusion to the characters 
  • there’s such a perfect balance between humor and drama, and the humor is so diverse and clever. 
  • ed is such a complex and realistic character, and he goes through such great development 
  • THE SYMBOLISM! like i said before. the plot is mini but because everything is so rich in life lessons, consistent themes, and metaphors, this tiny plot just THRIVES. 
  • despite it starring two brothers, it’s so feminist…for a shounen, but even in general it’s pretty dam great and underrated. it has amazingly developed female characters (AND THREE FEMALE VILLAINS WITH FANTASTIC MOTIVATIONS–well dante is arguable, but she’s absolutely a much more developed villain than she gets credit for) and the lead female character forms at LEAST six female friendships. the strongest female character (i will fight anyone on this claim), Rose, subverts what is commonly seen as “strong female” and is actually such a badass. 
  • is anything ever surface-level in this show? nope. tbh a lot of criticism ive seen can be refuted because it was made without taking the time to analyze. the writers take their audience seriously, and expect them to fill in the blanks, which makes the show interactive, fun, and timeless. 
  • the art style and animation is GORGEOUS. AND it’s from 2003. the animation at its best far surpasses tons of anime today. the characters are so expressive and it helps their emotions feel real. even its off model moments tend to add to the effect rather than distract you. it has FAR fewer fight scenes than BH, but the few major ones it has are SO beautifully done. 
  • the music is hella. Brothers is beautiful, and the lyrics are heartbreaking, giving us an explicit insight into the brothers’ states of mind. the music is varied, covering all spectrums of mood. they also included many classical pieces that were just so brilliant. 
  • i just find the difference in tone from the manga and BH so great? it’s a canon au that interprets the characters and presents its themes so uniquely that its almost unrecognizable. its fascinating and i respect all the people involved. 
  • the presentation/directing. cant count how many times that alone was what made a scene rise above and beyond. thats one thing i respect: making something exceed its potential. i feel from the series that the team had faith in what they were creating, and nurtured it from the start. it wasn’t just an adaptation with their own twist; it became their own story and it SHOWED

i find it so fascinating and interesting and telling that it’s the moments of tragedy and heartbreak where you see how much tony and steve really loved each other. bc trust and intimacy, caring so deeply for each other, risking their own lives to save the other person  ––  that’s just second nature. it’s instinct. it’ll always be a part of who they are and their relationship with each other, it’s not something that needs to be Telegraphed and pointed at to be real and profound and life-changing. 

they both know that the moment they met, the moment when steve opened his eyes and saw the avengers, when tony’s voice was the first one he heard after decades of the ice, that their lives would never be the same. there are Direct Quotes to illustrate that but tbh even if those didn’t exist they know.

because this is a friendship that’s been building on over a decade. ten years of fighting beside each other, inspiring each other to be better men, better heroes, better leaders, seeing each other at the best and the lowest. this friendship is one of the most long-lasting & significant friendships for both of them. the avengers liken them to mom and dad because this is literally the closest analogy there is in terms of the sheer closeness, understanding and compatibility that exists between them. when it’s been that long, everything becomes implicit, unspoken, it just is. you don’t need the constant affirmation – even though stevetony do that too – of the love and loyalty between you. 

so, it’s really only when they hit those Dark Times that it manifests in all this terrible conflict and anger and ugliness. people are constantly trying to characterise modern stevetony (e.g. 2007 – present) as ‘steve and tony are always at each other’s throats’ but like Again, As I Always Do, i want to point to the revolutionary concept that the only reason they can hurt this much and hurt each other this much is because of how much they loved each other in the first place. their love and hate at different periods throughout their wars or conflicts or civil wars aren’t mutually exclusive, the anger / betrayal / grief / heartbreak bleed into each other. 

these moments of conflict wouldn’t have as much impact as they do if they happened all the time. and they don’t. steve and tony have lead multiple teams, saved the world, endured one or both of them being brainwashed, and remained steadfast in who they are to each other throughout. marvel pits them against each other because of how significant their relationship is and the fact that tearing them apart means they can generate a universe-wide event, a film franchise, multiple spin-offs and essentially lasting (albeit unacknowledged) consequences for the rest of their comic universe.

tony spends a year in mourning, hallucinating steve and throwing himself into suicidal self-destructive missions during his tenure as director of shield after steve dies. when steve rejects any of his attempts to compromise and make peace during cw1, he literally prepares to die and let steve kill him. when steve thinks the illuminati has betrayed him and committed the most unforgivable act of erasing his memory, he only goes after tony. it’s tony he’s furious at, it’s tony he’s single-handledy hunting down, and it’s tony he wants to pay the most for what he’s done.

tldr, tbh, altho depressing and utterly typical of marvel to do so, i find it v. true to life and realistic that it’s only in moments of point-of-no-return tragedy that we get the big moments and confessions and ‘i loved him’. the tragedy of stevetony is that these two men do love each other, and they both know it on an instinctual, intuitive level. everything about the way they interact and trust and hurt each other is indicative of that love. they never expect there to be a moment where that love won’t be there in the subtext, they never Expect that there’s going to be a ‘this is my last chance to tell him’ kind of moment. (bc usually, lbr, it’s some kind of world-ending crisis where they’re in the middle of a war on opposing sides.) their tragedy is that they’ve spent so long loving and being in love w/ each other where the timing has never been right, or they keep convincing themselves they’re content with the status quo, or the other person isn’t in the right place or headspace to hear it, that they just never get their Moment.

so their moments end up being morgue-side confessions, hugs and speeches where one person all but tells the other person they can’t live w/o them, and y’know, the ultimate act of no homo where the only universe they’d ever be together is if they can become a heteronormative straight™ couple.

anonymous asked:

do you have a favourite homesteading passage from the books? one of my favourite aspects of the outlander novels is their depiction of early american settlement and subsistence farming, like the scenes from the first winter on the ridge in DoA. more than anything in book 9 i'm looking forward to more little snippets of that simple 18th c isolated farm life... which i realise is pretty weird!

What a fascinating ask! Not weird at all, anon - after all the pain and heartbreak that Jamie and Claire have been through, it’s so rewarding to see them leading a quiet, peaceful, domestic life. The life they always wanted to have together.

I’ve always loved this passage from The Fiery Cross - where Jamie is slowly kissing every inch of Claire, and tasting her. And in so doing, tells a story about how Claire spends her days - busy with domestic affairs - and we learn a lot about the simple pleasures that Jamie takes from their life together. And how much he appreciates just how hard she works to maintain that life.

He took my hand and lifted it to his nose, sniffing delicately. “Onions,” he said, “and garlic. Something hot … peppercorns. Aye, and clove. Squirrel-blood and meat-juice.” His tongue flicked out like a snake’s, touching my knuckles. “Starch—potatoes—and something woody. Toadstools.”  

  “Not fair at all,” I said, trying to get my hand back. “You know perfectly well what we had for dinner. And they weren’t toadstools, they were woodears.”  

  “Mm?” He turned my hand over and sniffed at my palm, then my wrist and up my forearm. “Vinegar and dill; ye’ve been making cucumber pickles, aye? Good, I like those. Mm, oh, and soured milk here in the fine hairs on your arm—were ye splashed churning butter, or skimming cream?”  

  “You guess, since you’re so good at it.”  


  “Damn.” I was still trying to pull away, but only because the stubble on his face tickled the sensitive skin of my upper arm. He smelled his way up my arm into the hollow of my shoulder, making me squeak as the strands of his hair drifted across my skin.  

   He lifted my arm a bit, touched the damp silky hair there, and ran his fingers under his nose. “Eau de femme,” he murmured, and I heard the laughter in his voice. “Ma petite fleur.”

– The Fiery Cross

Originally posted by jjks

Prompt: “Not to be edgy, but this isn’t good cop / bad cop. This is bad cop / worse cop, and trust me, you don’t want to find out which is which.”

pairing: jungkook x reader
genre: angst
type: badboy au
words: 654

When Jeon Jeongguk appeared in front of your doorsteps looking too good, too enticing with a smile that could trick you into love and colorful neon jacket, you knew tonight can go two ways: you can sit back and relax whilst binge watching Criminal Minds or you can find yourself  press up against the side of a Toyota parked on the edge of the road, grasping Jeongguk’s hand with a vice grip and him letting you cut his circuit off because he it’s the only reason he has to hold your hand.

“Not to be edgy, but this isn’t good cop / bad cop. This is bad cop / worse cop, and trust me, you don’t want to find out which is which.” Jungkook surmises after dropping down under the window after stealing a glace at the flashing red and blue lights. The silence is eerie as the footsteps get closer, his heart beating too fast, too erratically. Out of all nights, why does he have to cross paths with them while he’s with you? You’re going to hate him for tainting your records. Jungkook almost jumped out from your hiding spot, hands in the air as he surrenders, as long as your name’s cleared. Almost.

Then you laugh, the sound trickles from your mouth like chimes and for a moment, Jeongguk forgets about where you are and why you’re hiding behind a car again. He’s tempted to whip out his phone from the back pocket so he could record the angelic sound of your laughing but he decides against it and instead clasps a hand against your mouth as, in the process pulling you closer until your back is pressed flush against his chest. If you notice his erratic heartbeat, you don’t show it. You probably assume it’s due to the scuffing boots nearing the car you’re behind painfully leisurely as if the person is trying to prolong this cat and mouse game.

The tap on Jeongguk’s hand returns his eyes to you, yours looking like the stars and galaxy is trapped in them as they curve into moons. He’s reminded again of how you easily agree to his boyish smile and little sweet lies of a plain night out. In the end, the one who’s convinced is always him, convinced by your curious eyes as you tell him about the quieter side of town that the people from your lecture was talking about, convinced by your innocent amazement when he handed you the ivory spray can and told you with a proud smirk to go crazy as triumphantly rejoice in his head because he’s the one who you’re doing this with for the first time, he’s the one who fulfills your curiosity and the loves you will meet after this will never compare. He hopes.

And as he stares back at your devious gaze, he realizes how his actions were never his. He lets you guide his hand down, granting a view of your enthralling smile. The only thing he manages to do is swallow thickly, bracing himself as he lets you twine your fingers together. Your grip is firm, strong, promising; never let go.

It’s all a blur, how you shoot up, prompting him to do so from your connected hands, him almost tripping when you both pass the familiar crack in the sidewalk that he’s memorized easily in his head, the sight of your shoulder blades against your skin tight t-shirt. Jeongguk tries not to hold you both back as shouts echo from the spot you’ve just bolted from, flashlights flashing, footsteps closing in and he’s not sure if running is better than waiting it out and hoping for something out there to help the both of but then he meets your fascinating gaze. 

It’s dangerous, it’s insane and it’s oh so exciting setting himself up for the heartbreak of a lifetime as he falls more in love with you.

Isaac Lahey/ Derek Hale | Mine not yours.

Count of words: 930

Warnings: none

A/N: Sorry it takes me so long to update it’s just that I am on vacation and going to the beach everyday, all day long, until late at night takes too much of my time and too much of my energy….

Requested?: Yes

Anonymous asked:

Hi could you do issacxreaderxderek where the reader and issac basically like bff and the reader broke up with derek while issac have to deal with alisson died. And because of that they’re like closer than before and the reader said ‘do u know whats the common between us? People that we love they left us while we still crazy in love with them" and issac realise he fall in love with her but he have to deal with derek that still not get over from the reader? Thanks!!❤

Author: Katerina ( @littlealphawolf )

requests here

masterlist here

“But De-” “No! Get out of my house!” Derek screamed at the small framed girl in front of him. She carefully gathered all of her belongings from the two’s bedroom and then reached for a big suitcase hidden in the back of one of the closets. Thankfully everything fit in there so she wouldn’t have to come back and face this, now, broken relationship again. It had been toxic for quite some time but none of the two wanted to admit it, it would be too painful to do so. So, they just let it envolve, grow and hurt them even more. Once again, Derek had gotten angry; no scratch that, he got livid, thinking his beloved girlfriend cheated on him with the powerful new Alpha in Beacon Hills, Scott. Truth be told, Y/N, was simply helping the boy that was determind to succeed.

Isaac, on the other hand, had a whole different story of heartbreak. A boy that had never really felt loved or wanted, had finally found someone to do so. It was the Argent girl, Allisson, the bad ass archer of the small supernatural town. He was fascinated by her, her confidence; a trait she didn’t have when she first moved to Beacon Hills, he was lured by her beauty and her need to help, as well as the need to love him. It was a dream come true for Isaac, despite all the dangers in the town, that new enemy that no one knew how to defeat, it didn’t matter to him. It was by far the best time of his life. Unfortunately, the boy’s happiness didn’t last long. Allisson’s death broke him even more; it devestated him. He had loved her so much and now he just had an empty spot in his heart that she had fullfilled not so long ago. The only one for him to turn was Y/N, his best and only real friend.

The two were always close, but now, on a time when both were going through heartbreak, they were closer, heving to be each other’s rock and hold them when they cried. It was somewhat comforting that they both were going through the same pain together, it was like these stories of couples or best friends that were fighting to lose weight together. Both were there to motivate the other to fight this, to be stronger and it got easier as time passed by, but it wasn’t over yet.

It was a cold night, Isaac and Y/N were sitting by the balcony in her house, gazing at the stars gracing the night sky. It was quiet, slight sniffles coming from Y/N sometimes, until a bitter laugh escaped her lips. “You know what is common between you and I, Isaac?” She questioned, eyes still red, puffy and weary. They boy nodded in negation. “It is the fact that people we love left us while we’re still crazy in love with them.” Isaac nodded in agreement, this time, only to change his mind, a whole new thought roaming his head as realisation hit him. “You see, you are mistaken, bun butt,” he started, pausing and allowing for the girl to chuckle at the commonly used nickname. “I was never crazy in love with Allison. I loved her, yes, but I was mostly infatuated by the feeling she gave me. She made me feel loved. But, love, I think I’m in love with you.” 

Silence took over that moment as the girl was still proccessing Isaac’s words. He had started to get worried that everything was ruined, until a pair of soft lips crashed on his. It was a gentle kiss, full of love and need for compassion. It was beautiful, all the feelings kept hidden in their wildest thoughts puring into it. It was then that Isaac felt that hole in his heart slowly fill again.

“What do you want from me this time, Derek? I took all of my things when you kicked me out in the middle of the night.” Y/N voiced, quite irritated by the presence of the man in front of her. “That’s the thing, I want them all back in my loft. I want you back in my loft, with me, in my arms.” The man confessed, stray tears escaping his eyes. “I’m sorry, Der, but it’s too late now.” “Please, give me another chance-” The door was slammed at his face for the first of the many times that were to come. The girl had slowly gotten over that toxic realationship with that toxic man, but as the time passed by that man realised that it was the biggest mistake of his life, and he had done many.

Isaac started to grow mad and tired of this situation. Derek would come and knock on the door, Y/N would answer and then shut the door at his face, but that never stopped him from coming back. This time Isaac would open the door and face his former Alpha. “Y/N thank God I-. Isaac?! What are you doing in my girl’s house.” “That’s the problem, Derek, she is not your girl any more. She is mine! Mine! So stop bothering her. She is over you. You broke her bad this time, but I was here. You realised what you gave away a little too late, Derek. So leave!” Said the younger boy, a sudden rush of confidence running through him, as the man seemed quite taken by surprise. Despite that, realisation hit Derek. He had lost what he once had, he gave it away and he didn’t deserve to get it back. 

Ragethirst highlights: Legend of the Fist

This movie was actually really good? I mean, Donnie Yen singlehandedly won WWI, so that was fun. But the plot was fascinating, the characters were great, it was heartbreaking and lovely and just an overall good movie.

That being said, there were some definite highlights.

  • The costumes. Holy fuckballs, the costumes. Donnie needs to be banned from wearing waistcoats, it does terrible things to us. Also he is blocked forever thanks to that fucking bomber jacket.
  • Kiki. We are all. So gay for Kiki. 
  • This film was basically a mashup of Casablanca and Batman.
  • Donnie is Kato.
  • I looked away from the chat for two minutes to try and focus on the movie, and when I glanced back, they were gleefully discussing rimming, felching, and snowballing. 
  • The weird cut when Donnie left the girl and the score began to play and we legit all thought the girl had just burst out into operatic music. 
  • Torture Butt™
  • So many emotional whiplashes. Sad to funny to heartbreaking to action to more sad.
  • I still don’t even understand how it happened, but Jo and Sarah outlined a High School Musical AU of Rogue One. 
  • Donnie’s mustache was an experience. Donnie taking off the mustache was a sexual awakening.

You’re welcome.

anonymous asked:

hey! so im the person who asked for musical recs and im hella new to musicals so i've only listened to hamilton, tgc, deh, and heathers. thanks!

okay, awesome. i think the best way to do this would be to break it up into a few categories. and of course, there’s tons of shows out there that i can’t possibly all mention here! so keep that in mind. these are just a few of my personal faves. (and don’t think you need to listen to all of them! think of this as just a list of possibilities.)

1. THE OLD-SCHOOL CLASSICS–pre 1970, very traditional music, relatively straightforward plots, resolutions, etc

•west side story! you’ve heard of this one. romeo and juliet, but nyc gangs. classic tragic love story with some damn good music.

•the sound of music! don’t watch the carrie underwood version lmao. takes place in 1930s austria. a young aspiring nun isn’t quite fit for the job, so her convent sends her to work as the governess for the seven children of a widower. cute love story, but also they flee from nazis. julie andrews is everything.

•seven brides for seven brothers! this isn’t quite as much of a true classic as much as those first two are, but it’s a personal favorite. a mountain man in 1850s oregon sets out to get a wife; when he successfully returns home, she realizes she’s meant to take care of his 6 uncivilized brothers, too. she whips them into shape, and eventually they all fall in love with 6 of HER friends. shenanigans ensue. questionable gender dynamics but w/e.

2. THE NEW CLASSICS–more recent shows that have established themselves as Important Musicals, may be more experimental or innovative, may just be super popular, either way ought to be remembered down the line

•wicked! a musical prequel to the wizard of oz that explores the relationship between the wicked witch of the west and glinda the good witch…as college roommates. crazy popular show, you might know “defying gravity” or “popular” already.

•rent! be prepared to cry and want to rage against society, dude. centers around a group of artists in new york city near the middle/end of the AIDS epidemic. about half the main characters are lgbtq, and about the same number live with HIV/AIDS. focuses on the artists trying to fight against gentrification and society while also dealing with personal struggles.

•fun home! a very recent show, won the best musical tony in 2015. explores the life of lesbian cartoonist alison bechdel (ever heard of the bechdel test? she inadvertently created it) through three perspectives: her as a young girl, a college student, and an adult reflecting on her life. follows her journey with regards to her sexuality as she grew up and her relationship with her father, a gay man who committed suicide when she was in college. so heartbreaking, so amazing. a personal favorite.

•in the heights! lin manuel miranda’s first show. it follows a close knit community of black and latinx people who all live on the same block in washington heignts. the plot focuses on how the community is rocked by 1. the revelation that one of them has won $96,000 in the lotto and 2. a massive blackout. super funny, super emotional, amazing music.


•hairspray! it takes place in the 1960s (super cute costumes/musical styles) and follows an overweight teenage girl named tracy turnblad who wants to dance on her local tv station’s after school teen dance program. it also addresses the racial struggles of the time as the black dancers fight for the tv station’s integration. super funny, really fun music, lovable characters.

•legally blonde! yes, there’s a musical adaptation of the movie, and i love it. you might know the plot; elle woods, a sorority girl from california, is dumped by her trust fund boyfriend who wants to find someone more “serious” at harvard law, so she decides to get into harvard law to prove her worth to him. along the way, she finds out she’s worth a lot more.

•the book of mormon! i’m not exaggerating when i say this is probably the funniest show i’ve ever seen/listened to. like, the music is laugh-out-loud hilarious. it was actually written by the dudes from south park, so there’s that. it’s about two young clueless mormon missionaries who get sent to uganda and have to try to spread the word of god while trying to fight back against a warlord. so. fucking. funny.

4. AMAZING SCORES–like, i don’t necessarily mean here that i love every single individual song, but if you like incredibly intricate music with beautifully recurring themes (like great comet), these you might like.

•les miserables! one of my personal all-time favorites. it takes place in the early nineteenth century in france, and it’s about this dude named jean valjean, who went to prison for years for stealing bread. he gets out and decides to basically remake his whole life. later, he becomes a successful factory owner and adopts the daughter of one of his former workers, then the daughter grows up and falls in love…there’s a lot going on. just watch the show.

•into the woods! you like fairy tales? well, here’s ALL of them mashed into one show. seriously, sondheim is sorta a crazy genius. it’s about a generic baker who, to lift a curse, has to get jack (and the beanstalk’s) cow, some of rapunzel’s hair, little red riding hood’s cape, cinderella’s shoe…a lot happens, yo.

•sweeney todd! sondheim again, and this one is pretty dark and crazy, lmao. a vengeful barber named sweeney todd starts cutting the throats of his clients, and his accomplice/friend/lover(?) mrs. lovett, who runs a pie shop, starts baking the clients into pies to help get rid of the evidence.

5. WEIRD SHIT–broadway can be weird and experimental, idk.

•spring awakening! based on a german play from the late 1800s, i believe. german farm teens discover the strange wonders of sex for the first time, accompanied by mid-2000s indie rock.

•avenue q! it’s like sesame street rated r. it’s all puppets, except the puppets swear and fuck and stuff. the music is catchy as hell, though.

•little shop of horrors! a classic, tbh. a mild-mannered nerd works in a flower store, comes across a weird-ass alien plant. the plant can talk and stuff. turns out the only thing that can satisfy it is human blood! lots of murder by plant. really funny, though.

6. PERSONAL FAVORITES–things that didn’t fit in any other category precisely but i still like, idk.

•newsies! there’s a movie with baby christian bale lmao, but the stage show is better. newsboys in 1899 go on strike when newspaper suppliers raise prices. VERY dancey. very catchy songs.

•falsettos! oh man, i love crying. a gay man, marvin, leaves his wife (and son, a bit) for his lover, and after everyone finally gets sick of his shit, is forced to reckon with his own maturity and problems. then, in the second act, more stuff happens, but i don’t want to spoil it. PLEASE listen to falsettos. it’s one of my favorites of all time.

•the last 5 years! this show actually has only 2 people in it. it tells the story of a relationship from both people’s perspectives. the thing is, her songs go from the end of their relationship backwards to the beginning, and his go chronologically from the beginning to the end, and they meet just once in the middle. it’s just songs going back and forth, and the songs are pretty wonderful.

•next to normal! it’s about a woman with severe mental health problems and her family trying to make it through as she struggles to find a treatment that will help keep her “balanced.” kinda heartbreaking, kinda wonderful, raises some fascinating questions about mental health and if treatment is right for everyone.

•heathers! you’ve already listened to it. i just love it so i’m gonna say it anyway.

this is, well, TONS of shows, so i think i’m good! happy listening!

I think I finally figured out what’s so adorably tragic about Thrawn

So like, I was reading Outbound Flight and just finding myself constantly going “awwwww” at Thrawn’s adorable tendencies to get over-excited about everything. Because no matter how excited he gets, it’s always like, contained under a suave exterior.

But then I realized how tragic this is. I mean, like in almost every scene of this book Thrawn is just like “OTHER CHISS COME HERE LOOK AT THESE HUMANS! ISN’T IT FANTASTIC THEY ARE BEINGS FROM ANOTHER GALAXY THEY CAN TEACH US SO MUCH ABOUT OURSELVES! OMG HUMANS, COME HERE AND LOOK AT THIS ART!!! HEY BRO, LOOK AT THESE HUMANS LOOK HOW WONDERFUL THEY ARE JUST LOOK AT THEM LOOOOOOK” and yet his culture makes him keep all his excitement contained. And it’s so heartbreaking because it’s clear that Thrawn is just desperately looking for validation that it’s okay that he’s like this. Like, litearlly reread almost everything he does - everything he likes (art?) everything he plans (preemptive strikes!) he literally ALWAYS asks everyone around him their opinions because he is ALWAYS LOOKING FOR SOMEONE ELSE TO VALIDATE HIM like “PLEASE ALSO ENJOY THIS WITH ME/TELL ME YOU ALSO FIND THIS FASCINATING/ I’M SO TIRED OF BEING ALONE.”

Which is why I think Thrawn and Eli Vanto make the best pair - Eli generally thinks what Thrawn is doing is clever as heck, downloads art so Thrawn can look at it, and just totally supports him and is utterly loyal to him.

@devouring-time asked me about my take on Anders, and 2k words later I’m still pretty sure I’ve failed to explain myself.

Short version: Do I like Anders? Yes. Does he break my heart? Hell yes. Do I think everything he does is perfect and that blowing up the chantry was an acceptable action? No.

Long version under cut. Please proceed with caution, particularly if you are sensitive about reading unflattering things about Anders.  

This is kind of a mess because it’s been a while since I’ve gone into deep analysis about him.

Keep reading

So, Rogue One isn’t that far away, but it’s not here yet and so I may be chewing on the walls just a little bit, so, okay, here, have a bunch of STAR WARS fic that helped me pass the time. I EXPECT A SURGE OF YOU TO JOIN ME AGAIN WHEN THE MOVIE COMES OUT BECAUSE I NEED MORE FIC ABOUT THE ORIGINAL TRASH LORD DUMPSTER FIRE, I just love him so much, okay. p.s. the Catalyst novel is delightful, you should definitely read that, too. (Fic recs every Wednesday.)

shelter by tangeton, obi-wan/anakin, 16.1k wip
   A Jedi and a slave walk into a bar. This could be a setup to a terrible joke, and it is, because Obi-Wan really hadn’t meant to free all the slaves on this blasted planet. Tatooine AU.
space dementia by wellwhiskey, eventual obi-wan/anakin/padme & dooku, sith!obi-wan, 30.7k wip
   AU - Darth Maul survives the Battle of Theed. Obi-Wan succeeds in his quest for vengeance but fails to escape The Dark Side. Anakin goes along for the ride.
all the words you cannot say by wreckageofstars, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka, 1.6k
   Obi-Wan Kenobi is dead. Ahsoka and Anakin struggle to pick up the pieces.
Chase the Sun by Syphrosine, kanan/hera & rex & ocs, 25.4k wip
   Low on funds, Hera and Kanan are relieved when a well-paying salvage job falls into their laps. But what starts out as a simple retrieval will soon put the secret of Kanan’s Jedi past at risk.
Completely Irrational by deaka, luke/mara & ben skywalker, 2.1k
   Ben overhears his parents arguing about his training. Luke, Mara, Ben, before LotF.
Soldier, Poet, King by Glare, obi-wan/anakin & qui-gon & mace & cast, 77.4k wip
   Second chances are very rarely given, but the Force smiles upon two of its favorite children and returns them to a time before their actions have met their consequences. Anakin Skywalker, also known as Darth Vader, seeks redemption while Obi-Wan “Ben” Kenobi, disillusioned with the Jedi Order and its Code, falls to the Darkness. Trapped out of time, Master and Apprentice must once again work together to stop Sideous’ plans from reaching fruition and bring Balance to the Force—all the while dodging the Jedi, the Sith, and their feelings for each other.
Deja Vu by SkippingSteppingStones, obi-wan & anakin & luke, 2k
   When Darth Vader is roused from sleep by a sob he feels strangely connected to, he is compelled to find its source.
Don’t Look Back by Valairy Scot, obi-wan & anakin, 26.7k
   ObiWan Kenobi doesn’t believe in luck. It’s one choices and training, not luck, that determines one fate. When he and his padawan are stranded in the mountains, he faces a life or death decision and Anakin Skywalker faces a lesson he never wished to learn
A Walking Shadow by lilyconrad, obi-wan & anakin & luke & leia & padme & ahsoka & cast, 57.3k wip
   It is five years into the Empire’s ascension, an order built on the blood and bodies of the Jedi. None survived, they say, and the handsome, icy profile of Lord Vader plastered across every Imperial city leaves no room for doubt in the minds of many. But Vader knows there is at least one left, one that escaped him on Mustafar all those years ago.
From a Certain Point of View pt 1 / pt 2 / pt 3 / pt 4, obi-wan & anakin & padme & ahsoka & sidious & cast, 7.5k
   Or, how Ben Kenobi’s boldfaced lie prevarication saved the Galaxy (but not in the way he thought it would).
Ask Me No Questions by XtinethePirate, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 4.4k
   Anakin and ObiWan. An interlude between the Jedi Boys in the shower leads to a pointed question… and an unexpected, but very emphatic, answer.
A Personal Matter by ruth baulding, obi-wan & cast, 3.4k
   Angst-ridden epilogue to CW Episode 5.1 “Revival.”
They Are by Charmisjess, dooku & qui-gon, 1.7k
   This is their moment, their eternity. They think its going to be like this forever.
dusk before sundown by thegoddessinzerogravity, anakin & ahsoka & shaak ti, 1.3k
   Shaak Ti gently ran her fingers over the still-sleeping Ahsoka’s forehead. “Master Skywalker, I’m going to be honest with you. When Ahsoka first reached the age where she was to be assigned a Master, I was very close to requesting that she be assigned to me, not anyone else.” Anakin tried to ignore the sudden ache in his chest, and managed to ask, “Do you regret it?”

full details + recs under the cut!

Keep reading

arbuscular  asked:

Do you have any Voltron fic recommendations? You write so well I figured you probably have good taste in fanfic or good bad taste in fic (I think you're great and I wanna know what you think is great).

Hiya! Sorry it’s taken me a while to answer this. I definitely do have recs. My bookmarks on AO3 have some, but I’ll try to pick out some favorites. These are all gen unless otherwise noted.

Ubiquitous by kiafeles
Words: 10,434
Author’s Summary: Lance turns away and fiddles with his bayard to hide his thoughts. He’s always been expressive, but he would like those expressions to be chosen by his conscious mind, thank you very much. As he stares down at the gun in his hands, he flexes his fingers, relishing the warmth that comes from the tool. It’s a different sort of warmth than he’s used to, unlike the warmth of a mother, of fire, or of blood, but warm all the same. In fact, it reminds him of Blue.
My Comments: This is a wonderful character study of Lance and Shiro and their place on the team and their thoughts on themselves and each other. Featuring sniper Lance and his bond with the lions, and Lance being able to pull out a cool new ability to save the day. Apparently now part of a series?? I need to read the next one!

A Cure for Boredom by JED1
Words: 3,194
Author’s Summary: Visors darkened in another training exercise, Lance and Blue must find a cure for boredom in the canyons of a planet devoid of any forms of life.
My Comments: Super cute little fic and about Lance being a goofball and playing around with Blue. I love Lance and Blue’s bond here, how playful they both are and how much they enjoy each other’s company. Meshes with my headcanons very well.

Just Breathe by Merilindir
Words: 866
Author’s Summary: Shiro may have escaped the Galra, but the Champion is still their captive.
My Comments: A much too short little story about Shiro having a flashback and Coran helping him get through it. I love their dynamic, and it is realistic and heartbreaking. The author is also writing a really good fic, currently WIP, about the lion kids becoming a pack (alpha/beta/omega dynamics, but based on real wolves, not the kinkverse that that concept usually refers to).

Shadows of Our Dreams by KUG
Words: 10,185
Author’s Summary: -There comes a time and place where you don’t stand so tall-
The Paladins of Voltron have been reunited and are now resting and trying to heal, but nightmares tend to stick around longer than physical injuries. Time for a good ol’ fashioned sleepover with the team.
(Post-episode 11)
My Comments: It has literal cuddle piles and I honestly don’t know what else you need to hear. No seriously, it’s well-written and extremely cute, and it makes me fuzzy and warm inside.

A Simple Game by RenaRoo
Words: 6,226
Author’s Summary: At the end of the day, the paladins are kids facing life and death in a daily struggle. It’s a good thing then that they find just the right way to feel their ages again.
My Comments: The kids figure out how to do video games in space, and team bonding and shenanigans ensue. It’s a really fun read and it made me happy. I hope we get an episode with something similar, just showing them all goofing off and enjoying each other’s company.

the fear of falling by amillionsmiles
Words: 3,949
Author’s Summary: Keith can pull off a downward spiral. It’s the kind of maneuver he does in his sleep.
My Comments: It’s pre-series Keith at the academy and afterward, and it’s a really, really excellent, heartbreaking, and believable exploration of his character. I will be sad if his canon backstory is not at LEAST this good.

bruise of being by astrainclinant
Words: 6,845
Author’s Summary: Keith didn’t want to know why Lance was dreaming about spaghetti chasing him.
Alternatively: Keith and Lance end up with a mind bond and they’re all doomed. Probably.
My Comments: I’m so, so glad the author took this in a gen direction instead of making it a shippy fic, which it totally could have been, because I actually just find it so FASCINATING to explore ways in which Keith and Lance could overcome their difficulties with each other and become FRIENDS. Like actual, real life friends who appreciate each other and enjoy each other’s company, despite their differences. This is a really fun scenario, and I enjoyed reading it very much.

Okay, well, there’s a few. Feel free to reblog this and add more. I will probably have to do more rec lists in the future, too. Good gen fics are a little difficult to pick out of the enormous sea of Klance that is this fandom on AO3, but they exist, and I’m always happy to find one.

“Why should I watch Carmilla?”
  • it is one of the few media representation of LGBTQIA+ people that doesn’t focus on their coming out story
  • annie briggs
  • it’s about a bunch of kids trying to save their school 
  • LGBTQIA+ diversity 
  • kaitlyn alexander
  • it doesn’t only focus on the romance 
  • it’s fucking fascinating
  • we are called the tampon fandom
  • the actors are so amazing and they are so open with fans, answering questions, taking pictures and just being incredibly nice in general
  • it manges to have a story that is mysterious, fascinating, moving, heartbreaking, hopeful and thrilling in two episodes a week that are less then 8 minutes
  • sharon belle
  • you can ask the charecters questions on social medias???? isn’t it the coolest thing ever???? where else can you do that?????
  • natasha negovanlis
  • elise bauman

anonymous asked:

i'm not too much into the fandom, but i loved s1 noora, and was really disappointed how they destroyed everything she stood for in s2 for willydicky. but i can't really understand why people hate s4 noora? like she was the only one trying to connect to sana, everyone else were rolling their eyes at her. of course the s4 willydicky part but i wouldn't blame that on noora, more on julie and her fascination of forcing unhealthy w/m relationships down our throat. and the yousef part was just cheap s

shock value tbh (to create unnecessary drama)

first of all it’s wise that you’re not too much into the fandom so good job, but like i think the reason everyone hates season 4 noora is mostly because of how much space she took up in a narrative that was meant to be about sana, but also how she didn’t listen to sana either and said insensitive things like “you’re so lucky you don’t experience heartbreak because you’re muslim”
a prayer for which no words exist - written by Eliane
By Organization for Transformative Works


“Louis is a few seconds away from blowing up a rather important section of the New York subway when he sees Harry for the first time.”

Author - Eliane          Tumblr - @cleminism

Chaptered - 8/8 - 34,313 words

Review - 10 out of 10 Larry Thumbs!!!

Wow. Just… wow.

This fic is incredible. It took my breath away and brought me to tears so many times. It’s somber and powerful, raw and filled with love. I really connected with Louis, and experiencing his journey through the story was so special.

At the heart of it, this fic is a character study. The author skillfully looks at what it means to be a part of war, to fight next to friends, and to fall in love during terrible circumstances. It’s fascinating, heartbreaking, and rewarding all at the same time.

This fic is truly a human story. The emotions and complexities of humanity play out in the foreground of dystopian New York City where there’s potential danger at every turn. Louis and Harry have each other to lean on throughout the journey, but the changes from “normal life” to “war life” are something they have to deal with on their own.

I can’t recommend this fic enough. Give it a read when you’re looking for something introspective and somber but also filled with love and compassion.

the-girlinthemirror  asked:

So I'm assuming that in-world all the inseparables live cast and not just Dorothy right??? So I was wondering when Dorothy is in the comments what is her screen name???

That’s right! (So presumably in-between Dorothy’s excitement and heartbreak last episode, breton live cast a fascinating story about cheese).

Since the series follows Dorothy’s story, we don’t get to see what Dorothy’s screen name is this season but it 100% has the phrase “fight me” in it.

Newt and the beasties take three

I pretty much love it more every time I see it. I notice more things, think about what it’s trying to say more, just have a richer experience. And it’s just fun. I love it. Things I thought about in particular this time:

1. The MACUSA is paranoid as hell. You enter the British Ministry of Magic and you see (or at least you did pre-DH) a giant gold statue of magical people lording it over creatures. The centerpiece of MACUSA is a dial showing how far away wizarding society is from disaster. Seraphina Picquery mentions the possibility of war almost every time she speaks. They are terrified of Muggles, to the extent–and from what I’ve read this is intentional JKR’s part–that you almost kind of see Grindelwald’s point (aside from the mass slaughter, of course). I find this fascinating in the context of UK history vs American history.

2. Newt. Other people have written about this already, but I just can’t thank JKR enough for giving us another hero who is heroic beause of his heart and his fierce kindness, rather than because he’s a kickass fighter. SO BORED and weary of violent super heros. Newt’s devastation at the loss of his creatures is heartbreaking. He loves them so much. He talks with such sadness about his attempt to save the Sudanese Obscurial girl. And his “They’re not going to kill it” line before going off the try and save Credence. He doesn’t even think twice before throwing himself into danger to help someone in distress (which reminds me of Harry a bit). And yet I don’t think he used a single non-defensive spell the entire film. Maybe he did when he was facing off with Graves/Grindelwald in the subway? Mostly he was trying to protect Credence and shielding himself, though.

3. I think we do actually see Chastity’s body. There’s one body face down when Graves first enters, but Mary Lou’s is on her side. So I think the face down body is Chastity’s.

4. I also find the commentary on American culture made through the execution scene really interesting. And man, that scene is so chilling. The white-coated executioners are so kind. They’re smiling and gentle. They show no signe whatsoever that that they’re taking someone’s life, someone they know on a first name basis. It’s so horrible.

5. Queenie doesn’t take Jacob’s memory with her wand in the rain scene. Her wand is buy holding up the umbrella charm. I looked carefully and she doesn’t. I still think Jacobs gets at least some of them back in the final scene, though.

6. It’s actually really obvious that Credence survives? The camera focuses directly on the little flame which doesn’t so much float out of the wreckage as swim through the air like a little fish. Meaning it looks like it has intent. And Newt 100% sees it and knows.

7. I don’t know how anyone involved in that film can expect the audience not to read the alley scenes between Graves and Credence as sexual. I know what Colin Farell and Ezra said. Nah. Those scenes were blatanly erotic in a really dark way. imo, of course.

I’ve never seen a TV show with a better build-up than Shadowhunters. It’s winding its viewers up and up and UP, more and more so with each ep. And not action-wise, but character-wise, hitting all the buttons in every ep. I have never seen anything like that before. Yes, the first few episodes were mostly just so-so, some great scenes but overall a little unbalanced, but once the setting was done and they finally started focusing on the characters… wow, you could drop me with a feather, I’ve never been more wound-up O.o

For me personally, it’s the character of Alec that just takes my breath away. Before the show started airing, @tinaliatum rated his character A+++, as the best written character on the show, and I completely agree. The way he is slowly falling to pieces on-screen is fascinating, heartbreaking, incredible to watch. His relationship with Jace, with Magnus, with Izzy… with Max and his parents, every one of them is so nuanced, every step perfectly calculated by the writers… wow.

I’m used to shows with a lot of action, empty jokes and very little EMOTIONAL pay-off, most series on the big five are all “No homo, bro!” and whatnot, so, Shadowhunters? That they chose to make the most fascinating, deepest relationships to be between men who genuinely love each other, show it and say it? And that they cast actors with burning hot chemistry for those parts? Thank you so much, Shadowhunters, thank you!

dhaarunispeaks  asked:

Like the question is, in Cersei's position, how nice would you be? Her ableism and internalized misogyny and killing of innocent children is blatantly wrong, and I'm not justifying it, but the scariest thing about Cersei Lannister is that I think I'd be just as terrible as her with her upbringing/life experience/lovely marriage (major sarcasm). She honestly makes sense as a villain and makes me sad more than angry or vindictive when she suffers. Ramsay Snow? Not so much. Dude creeps me out.

Cersei is a product of Westeros society. She’s a heartbreaking character, and a fascinating one, and she’s strong, because I’m not sure I could handle the life she did. 

You know what’s sad about Jaime and Cersei, they were twins, and they looked so much alike they could pass for each other when they were kids. But one day they started getting treated different just for their gender. Suddenly she has all these rules and restrictions placed on her because of her gender, and Jaime has freedom, and power. And she wants that. 

Cersei wants power, Jaime never has. If Cersei had been born the man, she would have been that son Tywin wanted so badly. But she was a daughter and he passed her over, placing all his focus on Jaime who couldn’t have cared less. Her entire value is boiled down to two things: she’s a Lannister, and she can marry the family into a better position. Her dad will make her queen goddamn it. 

And you know what, for a point in time there, even while Cersei was dealing with the bullshit that is the patriarchal Westeros society, she was also Sansa. She believed that she would be Queen and her King would be good, and valiant and noble. Surprise, he’s a drunk who beats and rapes her. Which is why of course, she has no sympathy for Sansa. Clearly she thinks she’s delivering some wise life lessons to her, but that’s because she was her. 

Here is Cersei, the only agency and choice and power she can exercise is in her relationship with her brother. (Which is damaging to Jaime no doubt, but it’s not like Cersei forced him to have sex with her. He could have said no. Jaime’s identity issues are for another day though.) And she loves him, and he loves her, and he doesn’t hurt her and he gives her three beautiful golden haired children who are her purpose for living. 

And people threaten these children, our beloved heroes Ned and Tyrion threaten her children. Of course she’s going to do anything she can to stop them! She didn’t kill Ned, but she did conspire to kill Robert, because if Robert had found out he would have killed her children. (What ASOIAF mother wouldn’t have done the same?) 

Her treatment of Tyrion is a complex mater, it’s really hard to dip into without writing another paper just on that - but he did threaten to have Tommen (Tommen!) raped and killed. He threatened Joffrey. Of course she thinks Tyrion killed him. Of course she thinks he’d hurt her other children. He’s never given her a reason to believe otherwise. 

Cersei’s desire for power (which is as valid a choice as Jaime’s desire for love) reads as Tywin’s daughter wants power, but on the other hand is it so crazy for an abuse victim to want to be in control? To finally have power? Maybe if she’d had it all along, Robert never would have hurt her. 

But at the same time, she doesn’t really like other women. She’s got a lot of internalized misogyny  (some women could use a good rape), ablism (Tyrion / Lollys), and she re-enacts her abuse on Taena. 

Cersei isn’t a good person, by any means, but who gives a fuck? (Cersei doesn’t) She’s strong, and powerful, and and yes smart, and wonderfully deliciously complex. And she’s only going to become, honestly I think she might be one of the best literary characters of all time. Maybe I’m biased, I do hav a solid Lannister filter, but what we will see in the next two books will be incredible. Watching her descend into madness only to be killed by the one person she trusted. I don’t know if I’ll actually be able to make it through her death without crying. 

God this got long. 

TL;DR: Cersei is a fabulous bitch, a wonderful character, and more alive than your faves.