saying that a “straight woman” can’t comment on an excerpt from a book about compulsory heterosexuality to discuss her own life and how she, as woman, is affected by what the author is describing, because it’s somehow hurtful to wlw, is extremely thoughtless. the book was written to underline how women, and specially gay women, suffer because of the societal indoctrination permeating our early life that teaches us to learn to need and crave a constructed notion of love that is dependent on men. is it truly feminist to draw an unsubstantiated line between which women are and are not allowed to relate to an experience? what if the “straight” woman reading this now, glad to finally be making sense of her own experiences and feelings, discovers herself to be gay later on? fuck her, then, because she isn’t allowed to “make it about her”? in what world is this positive for women in general and for the gay and bisexual community specifically?
i can’t believe this needs to be said, but straight women aren’t the enemy. instead of feeling empathetic toward women who also struggle to deal with their attraction to men, and how that attraction almost always results in their having to relate to men who are abusive, sexist and dehumanizing toward them, why do people find that treating them as some Other and depriving them of possible life-saving information is a desirable course of action?
a woman reading a book written for lesbians about compulsory heterosexuality and finding aspects of it that she relates to isn’t a crime. you don’t know what she has gone through, you don’t have first-hand experience of her sexuality and how she relates to it, and you cannot possibly know she isn’t a lesbian or will not come to be one in the future.