this is just my brain being stupid

✰ * º ❛   that 70′s show sentence starters   ❜

‘  you know what your problem is? i’m too good looking.  ’
‘  god, what did you have for breakfast this morning? carnation instant bitch?  ’
‘  oh, is this what we’re gonna do today, we’re gonna fight?  ’
‘  because you’re breaking up the band, yoko!  ’
‘  an apple? where’s my candy, you son of a bitch.  ’
‘  she told me she loves me and then i told her i loved cake…  ’
‘  how’d you’d like to own a little bit of my foot in your ass?  ’
‘  look, if i could run across the beach into my own arms, i would.  ’
‘  you know he never liked phones. he said he could hear voices in ‘em.  ’
‘  when my time comes, i wanna be buried facedown so that anyone who doesn’t like me can kiss my ass.  ’
‘  you know what your problem is? you’re really cute… so no one ever told you to shut your pie hole.  ’
‘  god, we are such the… perfect couple?  ’
‘  you’re cold? well damn, i can’t control the weather!  ’
‘  the gym, or as i like to call it, the institute of things i can’t do.  ’
‘  well, i’d like to help but… not as much as i’d like not to.  ’
‘  don’t put me in your fantasies. i don’t even like being in your real life.  ’
‘  i don’t like people. i like rock n’ roll, sex, and pizza – in that order.  ’
‘  i’m not loving anybody that i’m not legally required to.  ’
‘  and if somebody doesn’t tell me i’m cute in the next five minutes, i’m gonna scream!  ’
‘  don’t hate me because i’m beautiful.  ’
‘  i can’t count on much in this crazy world, but i can always count on you.  ’
‘  i’m going to go out, meet some boys and crush their hearts one by one.  ’
‘  where zen ends, ass kicking begins.  ’
‘  you guys are fighting like cats and whores.  ’
‘  cake is good, but you cannot have sex with cake.  ’
‘  well, my head says no, but my heart says no.  ’
‘  the three true branches of the government are military, corporate, and hollywood.  ’
‘  hey man, if you don’t get caught, everything’s legal.  ’
‘  yeah, but god didn’t see that. i was in my van, and he can’t see through lead.  ’
‘  college is for ugly girls who can’t get modeling contracts.  ’
‘  college is for women who don’t want to marry the first idiot they meet and squeeze out his bastard moron children.  ’
‘  i was never happy. i was just less pissed off.  ’
‘  sometimes when i’m alone, i just love to cuddle.  ’
‘  i have a definite opinion on this… i don’t care.  ’
‘  when he’s unhappy, i know our relationship is in good shape.  ’
‘  all right, sleep tight and don’t let the bedbugs put their foot in your ass.  ’
‘  that’s your brain trying to comprehend its own stupidity.  ’
‘  we have some breaking news: i’m toasted.  ’
‘  but i don’t want to go outside. there are people out there.  ’
‘  oh, please. i’m a hot-looking, smooth-talking, frisky-assed son of a bitch.  ’
‘  no, i’m not pouting. that would upset our routine. god knows i wouldn’t want to move in a new direction and accidentally slip in a puddle of fun or anything.  ’
‘  i’ve just decided being sad is a waste of my time.  ’
‘  he called me ugly on the inside and the outside. i’m sorry, but he’s just wrong about the outside part.  ’
‘  i don’t really cook much. i just plan on getting by on my looks.  ’
‘  no, no, no, you just don’t move on from me. i’m like alcohol. you need a twelve-step program to break my smell.  ’
‘  you know, being here under the stars, sitting on the grass makes me really glad i’m not poor.  ’
‘  the person i love the most is me!  ’
‘  i was voted most popular, best legs, and now godmother? what can’t i do?  ’
‘  why am i alone and all of you less attractive people are happy?  ’
‘  it’s better to have loved and loss than to be butt ugly.  ’
‘  okay, i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: everyone loves me.  ’
‘  why get out of bed when you can read about people who got out of bed?  ’
‘  i got a lot of free time. i mainly use it to nap and cry.  ’
‘  i’ll just curl up in the fetal position and think about pancakes.  ’
‘  have you been in bed all day?  ’
‘  last night i only slept like… nine hours.  ’
‘  i pity you because you’re dumb.  ’
‘  responsible people don’t go around getting their nipples twisted.  ’
‘  they want to kill rock n’ roll because they know it makes us horny, man.  ’
‘  i would love car sex… or just sex… or just a car.  ’
‘  no, i don’t feel bad. i don’t feel anything.  ’
‘  man, think about it. we hold information that could crush the very heart and soul of one of our best friends… i live for days like this!  ’
‘  it’s like we’re too old to trick or treat and too young to die.  ’
‘  talking isn’t gonna help me, okay? what’s gonna help me is, like, drinking.  ’
‘  hey, yeah, that’s the worst idea i’ve ever heard!  ’
‘  i wish i was an octopus.  ’
‘  thanks, but i’ve gotta go to sleep because i have a big day of misery ahead of me.  ’
‘  life is too short to spend it with people who annoy you.  ’
‘  well, for your information, i’m already sorry i was ever born.  ’
‘  i don’t have a hickey. i was using a curling iron.  ’
‘  give me a reason why i shouldn’t set you on fire.  ’
‘  i’m a hottie, you’re a nottie.  ’
‘  prison is not an option for me, okay? i can’t pee in front of other people.  ’
‘  man, time really flies when you take two naps a day.  ’
‘  oh, no. now i have to act normal.  ’
‘  oh, i just remembered i can’t loan it to you on account of i hate you.  ’
‘  i’ve been diagnosed with a disease that makes me irresistible to women.  ’
‘  you know what the best thing god ever did was? boobs.  ’
‘  i’m like ketchup. i go good on everything!  ’
‘  when we were about to fool around and i said that i washed my hands, but i really just got done playing with like six dogs.  ’
‘  there’s a rabbit stuck in a tree and i want to return that rabbit to the wild so it can lay its eggs.  ’
‘  if this is about maturity then i want nothing to do with it.  ’
‘  a wedding without a trampoline? that’s crazy talk.  ’
‘  i don’t wanna blink ‘cause i’m afraid to miss even a second of your cuteness.  ’
‘  you seem normal around your family, but out in the real world, you’re kinda nuts.  ’
‘  i could get arrested. i could go to girl prison. this freakin’ rocks!  ’
‘  my parents are fighting all the time and they want me to choose sides, but i can’t because they’re both idiots.  ’
‘  why would sally sell seashells down by the seashore? i mean, that’s a terrible location for a seashell stand.  ’
‘  i’m not strong, but i know a lot of ways to destroy men emotionally.  ’
‘  i don’t have feelings for him. i just hate that bitch for making him happy.  ’
‘  i’m not jealous, i just want to pop that inflatable bitch and watch her fly around the room.  ’
‘  hello, it is me, the object of your desire.  ’
‘  i’m a beautiful girl with a shrill, demanding voice. i’m pretty hard to ignore.  ’
‘  a gold digger is what these idiots call a woman who knows that love eventually wears off, but money is forever.  ’
‘  you see, a more productive use of my time is revenge.  ’
‘  i cannot be held responsible for the things that come out of my mouth.  ’
‘  i don’t answer stupid questions.  ’

anonymous asked:

Can you do write smth along the lines of malachi/betty/jug?Like malachi interested in betty and also messing with her bc she’s jug’s girl?And jug becoming overly protective/jealous of her?I know its cliche but please❤️

“It’s really not a big deal Ronnie. It’s just a jerk being a jerk.” Betty adjusted the strap of her backpack as she kicked up dirt in the tiny trailer park on the Southside.

“A jerk? Really? Well does Jughead know that this jerk followed you home from school this afternoon ?” Veronica questioned, her voice lowering when her redheaded boyfriend and his beanie wearing best friend came into view.

Betty shook her head, cheerleading skirt swishing with the wind
“Malachi doesn’t know that I’m Jugheads girlfriend, I think.. I think he’s harmless. For some reason he’s taken to me but he’ll get tired of the chase soon, especially when he realizes I’m not interested.”

“Yeah, Okay, sure. You tell Jughead that.” Veronica rolled her eyes, dropping her bag to Jugheads makeshift porch before dropping dramatically into Archie’s arms

“Tell Jughead What?” The boy in question spoke,moving behind Betty and wrapping his arms around her waist , placing a soft kiss on the top of her head, his eyes curious.

“Nothing. It’s really nothing, there’s just this guy, he seems to have a bit of a crush on me. It’s really not a big deal.” Suddenly she was spinning around, Jugheads eyes dipping to her level

“Who’s this guy? Do I know him? Does he know me? What do you mean “crush”? Has he tried anything.” He rambled, just the tiniest bit of panic in his tone

“Yes, I… I would say you know him..” Betty whispered.

“Well Who is he? What’s his name?”

The beautiful blonde winced, her hands soothingly patting her boyfriends chest.
“His name is Malachi.”

Jughead pulled away, his eyes wide and filled with fire
“The Ghoulies?! Malachi the leader of the Ghoulies?! How the hell do you know he has a crush on you? How do you even see him, he doesn’t even go to Riverdale!”

Betty shook her head, her fingers gently gripping his cheeks
“He may have came to visit me after school and refused to leave until his friends met him halfway to my house, he asked me out but I said no! It’s really nothing to worry about!”

Jugheads has tensed, his teeth grit as he growled
“Did you tell him that you were my girl? That you were with me?”

The beautiful blonde crossed her arms defensively
“No I didn’t. I wasn’t sure if we were doing that.” She snapped.

Jughead mimicked her posture, copying her crossed arms and narrowed eyes
“And why the hell wouldn’t we be telling people that we’re together?” He challenged.

“I don’t know Jug, maybe because you still haven’t told Toni that we’re back together. I wasn’t sure who we were telling.” She bit out.

Archie cleared his throat
“Umm hey guys…” he started.

Completely ignoring the nervous quarterback Jughead fired back
“Oh come on Betty, it just hasn’t come up in conversation, I’m going to tell her as soon as we’re together. This has nothing to do with Toni, you just don’t want to tell that guy that you’re dating me. Plain and simple.”

“What?!” Betty hissed “why would I have to hide anything?! I’m not the one who thinks delaying the process is going to make it any easier!”

Veronica stepped forward
“Betty, Jughead, you might want too…” she began

“Is there a problem here Jones, you seem to be upsetting my girl Betty over here.”

Both sets of matching green eyes snapped to the long haired Ghoulie currently standing in front of them, a dangerous smirk on his face.

“Malachi..” betty whispered, rolling her eyes as Jughead puffed out his chest.

“You don’t belong here , this is Serpent territory. And she is not your girl.” The dark haired boy barked out, his fists clenched.

Malachi chuckled
“Well I’m just here to help a lady in distress, that screaming match you two were having didn’t seem too friendly. You okay sugar?” His eyes flicked to Betty.

“I’m fi…”

Jughead took a step in front of her
“Betty is my girlfriend, she is not your girl and she does not need your saving. Stay away from her and if I find out you ever stepped foot at Riverdale high again? It won’t just be me hissing at your front door.” He threatened, voice low and raspy.

Malachi grinned, his hands flipping up.
“Fair enough Snakeskin. She’s your girl… for now. When you get tired of reptiles come on down to the clubhouse and let a real man show you a good time.” He winked

Betty snorted in disgust
“I’m good thanks.”

“ Dont touch Betty, Don’t look at Betty, don’t even breathe in her presence.” Jughead reached for the blonde cheerleaders hand, squeezing her fingers.

As the chuckling Ghoulie dissapeared from view the couple turned to face each other

“I’m sorry.” They both spoke at the same time.

Jughead laughed, his hands moving to grip her waist
“Me first. I should have told Toni the day we got back together, I’m sorry I didn’t see it bothering you. And I’m sorry for snapping at you about Malachi, he’s just… I love you. I love you so much the thought of someone else taking you from me makes my chest hurt and my brain get fuzzy. I say stupid shit and I’m sorry.”

Betty brushed her fingers across his forehead, pushing the stray curl out of the way
“I’m sorry that I snapped at you, I know you don’t meant to hurt me, its just me being petty. I should have told Malachi we were together but I just didn’t think. I love you too and I’m not going anywhere.” Betty pressed a lingering kiss to Jugheads lips and smiled when she heard the relieved sigh slip from his mouth.

“As cute as this is, I do have a chemistry test I need to study for and Archie’s about two grades away from staying back, onward and upward love birds.” Veronica tugged a complaining Archie into the trailer leaving Jughead and Betty staring at the swinging door.

“Ready to enter the belly of the beast?” He grinned

Betty smiled back
“With you? Always”

you know what i love?

those silly, split second thoughts that you have that are SO FREAKING DUMB and you realize that a second later but by then you’ve already thought them and just groaned and/or facepalmed at yourself. 

for example, I just watched a gif/read a post about how a cat’s back paws always fall where their front foot already fell (good for hunting or something? idk) but my immediate stupid thought was “oh!! I wonder if people do that!”

… and then i realized. 

like it was less than .2 seconds after the first thought but STILL. boy howdy, can people be dumb sometimes. and i love it. look at this lil silly brain being a dummy. 

so i wanna hear more– reblog with your dumbest split-second thought in the tags. or in a comment. i dont care im not picky. 

Anonymous Hate - Bruce Wayne x Reader

So, lately, a lot of writing blogs I LOVE (though I probably don’t say it enough) received anonymous hate…It inspired me to write this piece. I hope you’ll like it, and if I receive anonymous hate for it, oh man, I’m so ready for this…Anyway, hope you’ll enjoy (forgive me if it’s not great, I slept only 4 hours in those last three days, and drunk too much coffee) : 

My masterlist blog :


Bruce Wayne’s heart is threatening to beat out of his chest, and he isn’t sure of what he’s feeling right now. 

Anger ? Worries ? Confusion ? 

Does he feel stun ? Or Furious ? 

Sad or scared ? 

Anxious or enraged ? 

He doesn’t know. 

And if there’s one thing Bruce Wayne hates, is to lose control over his own emotions. But he just couldn’t help it. 

He was used to it with you, and only with you did he not mind. 

When it was about you, he just couldn’t have any control of what he felt, and that was alright…Though it was always positive feelings. 

Love. Awe. Adoration. A strong friendship. Passion. Devotion. Respect. Affection. Tenderness. Yearning. Fondness. Adulation…

He was of course always worried about you because 1. since you became a Wayne you also became a target for people who’d want something from him or his company, or for those who wanted a huge ransom and 2. because he’s as much the Batman than Bruce, and if one day his secret identity was to be discovered by any of his enemies, your life would be in a life threatening danger…Well, more that it was already. 

This thought was already almost too much to bear (he broke it off with you in the first few months of your relationship, scared to lose you…until he realized that he would lose you anyway if he left you, and since you accepted him back with wide arms…). 

So now, faced with…All this. It was too real. It was too close from home. 

Both literally and figuratively. 

Because those “things” (he refused to give it the name he knew it actually had) arrived in your house. At Wayne’s Manor. 

He felt like a pregnant woman, as if his hormones were playing tricks on him, because it wasn’t possible that a single human being could feel all those feelings at once, naturally…Right ? 

And yet. And yet here, in front of your desk, reading all those terrible things…

-Bruce ? Are you there ?

Your voice makes him jump, and, startled, he whips around and is faced with you and all your Glory…Oh because you’re nothing but glorious, as the light of the sun going down hits you just right and makes you look like a goddess. 

His Goddess. And oh Bruce is glad that you cannot read minds, because if you could, you would mock him and his cheesiness right now. 

-Oh hey, here you are my heart. Say, for tonight, I was thinking…What is that ? Hey are you alright my Broosh ? 

You approach him, worried because he’s just so pale and he seems almost lost, as his eyes follow you as if it was just an automatic reaction. It’s only when you reach for his face, and stroke his cheek with soft fingers that he finally snap out of his strange haze. He leans in your touch, and, without saying anything, shows you what’s in his hand. 

You look down and…

-Oh. That. I knew I should have burn everything…But I always forget. I receive them with the rest of the fan mail and I just shove it in there promising myself to destroy it, in case you’d find them, and then…I forget, or get too busy with something and then forget. 

Keep reading

I Really Really Really Really Really Really Like You

[JayDick, AO3]

Dick blinked himself awake. Then he blinked again, just to watch the colors swirl.

“Hey buddy, how you feelin’?”

Someone was talking. Dick tilted his head, even though it was very heavy, to the right. Oh, there they were. Dick smiled at the man sitting on a chair by his bed. He was wearing a…

“Hat,” he supplied, feeling proud when the man laughed, dragging a hand down his face.

“Yeah, you probably feel pretty amazing right now, don’t you?”

Dick did feel pretty amazing.

“I feel,” he started, but then there was a door, and it was opening, and an actual angel appeared.

“Ah, you’re awake. About time, Dickhead, pretty sure Baby Bat was about to stage a revolution.”

Dick didn’t care about anything but this guy’s face, even when the man paused and just met his eyes for a long while. Not long enough.

“Why are you– why’s he staring at me like that?”

“Beats me, man.” Shush, hat. Angel was talking. “He’s on some serious drugs.”

Irritated, Dick flapped his hand (more like flopped it) at the man in the hat, shushing him. He wanted to touch that white spot in the hair. It looked soft.

“Are you soft?”

He had to know, it was vital.


Hat was laughing again but Dick let him. Hat didn’t matter. Angel looked good (he looked bewildered). He wasn’t answering Dick’s question though, so he tried to reach for the white but his arms weren’t long enough.

He expressed his displeasure (he whined like a toddler) and tried in vain to reach Angel who sat down heavily on the other chair in the room, immediately to Dick’s left. This meant that Dick could now reach his leg. It was a good leg.

“I like your leg.” 

Angel’s mouth was hanging open so Dick smiled at him. Hat chose this moment to fall off the chair and Dick’s head was so heavy but he still managed to turn it to look. He couldn’t see Hat anymore and got worried.

“Hat?!” He tried to sit up but everything was too heavy. A freckled arm held up the hat, waving it where he could see it, so he calmed down. Hat was okay. “He’s okay.”

“He sure sounds like it,” Angel remarked grumpily, almost too quiet to be heard over Hat’s gasping laughter.

“Oh man, I’m never letting you live this down, Dick.” 

Hat was getting up, but Dick had fingers. He had… a lot of them. Several. Many. 

“Aight, I can’t handle this. I’m gonna let the rest of the Batclan know that he’s awake, you’ll stay with him, right? Right. Bye, Dick!”

Hat was gone, but Angel was still sitting with him. Dick smiled besottedly at him.

“Are you gonna be here forever?” was what he tried to say but he started coughing in the middle of it. Man, his throat was dry.


A straw was in front of his face. He crossed his eyes to try to look at it but decided to put it in his mouth instead. The water felt good on his dry throat, and he made sure to tell Angel about it. Did Angel have a name?

“It’s… I’m Jason, Dickie.” Jason. Jason was smiling a little and Dick was in love, he was sure of it.

“Are we dating?” he asked, and Jason’s face turned red. It reminded Dick of the colors he’d seen when he first blinked. “There are a lot of colors, Jason.”

“Damn you, Roy, leaving me alone with this…”

Jason sighed, covering his face and Dick didn’t like that so he pouted. This time Jason was close enough that he could touch his hair. Startled, Jason jerked his head up from where he’d buried his face in his hands, elbows resting on his knees.

“You’re very pretty, Jason. I like you.” He grabbed his hand. It felt rough but he liked it anyway, even though he wasn’t sure why. He felt sleepy again. “I’d give you anything…”

“Go the fuck to sleep, Dick.” 

He liked the way Jason said his name so fondly, and drifted off with a smile on his face.

When Dick awoke again everything felt much less floaty. He gave a pained groan and lifted a hand to rub at the bridge of his nose. Damn, but his head ached.

“Are you with us?” 

Blinking against the fluorescent lights, he looked to his left where he found Barbara peering at him over her glasses. There was a computer resting on her lap and a mug of tea, still steaming faintly with heat, on the table beside his bed. He recognized the room as one of the surgery recovery rooms at the manor.

He opened his mouth to give an affirmative but only a dry croak came out. Setting her laptop aside, Barbara leaned over to grab a bottle of water from the mini fridge built into the side table. She put a straw in and he smiled gratefully at her when she placed it within sipping distance. Once he didn’t feel like his throat was made of sandpaper he replied,

“Yeah, I’m with you. What happened?”

Babs put a finger over her mouth, giving a meaningful glance to the window opposite her. When Dick looked over, he found Damian sleeping curled up on the window sill, mouth slightly open and looking his age for once. Dick sent him a fond look before turning back to a softly smiling Babs.

“You got hit by some debris and had to go through surgery. Nothing major, by our standards. The doc’ll go over what you’re not allowed to do for a few weeks,” Babs explained in a quiet voice. Dick was about to ask her to elaborate when the door opened and Roy entered.

“The Hat is back!” he proclaimed with a grin, making Damian jerk awake with a startled noise. “Whoops, sorry, kiddo.”

“Tt. Your voice is grating, Harper.” 

Damian gave him a solemn nod and Dick tried his best to return it without giving in to the urge to coo at how cute his little brother was, all flustered and trying to hide it. 

“Grayson. It is good to see you awake, and in full command of your sensibilities. I shall inform Pennyworth.”

With that Damian left the room, leaving Dick mildly befuddled.

“My sensibilities?” 

He was not reassured by Roy’s answering grin. Quite the opposite. Barbara laughed and picked up her computer again, tapping away.

“Well, you see… when a certain love struck bird is on a rather high dose of painkillers…”

As Roy laid out Dick’s drug addled antics he had to struggle not to just roll off of the bed and straight out the window. He had hit on Jay? And like a complete idiot, too! Great! Fantastic!

“Ugh,” he groaned. “That’s it, I’m never gonna be able to look him in the eyes ever again.”

“Probably not, yeah,” Roy said, cheerfully. Dick groaned and shoved his head underneath the pillow, praying it would be enough to choke him to death.

If Jason came by the manor while Dick was bedridden he didn’t deign to visit, and for that Dick was glad. Maybe they’d be able to laugh the incident off, but as more time had passed, the blurry half hour he’d spent alone with Jason had come into focus.

He had been deeply embarrassing, and stupidly obvious, if one knew how to look. And Dick wasn’t confident that he could act like he hadn’t meant every single word he’d said.

“I’d give you anything…”

Yeah, no. Dick grimaced. That one would be hard to explain away, wouldn’t it? He pushed it out of his mind for later contemplation, preferably scheduled for never, and got off the elevator when it stopped on his floor. Fumbling his apartment keys a little, he tried to focus on deciding which prepared meal (supplied by Alfred, of course) he’d heat up that night.

He’d been released from his forced bed rest only three days previous, and was feeling a little lonely in his empty apartment. Damian had been not-so-subtly suggesting he get a pet for months before his surgery and had only gotten less subtle while Dick was confined to the manor. Or at least that was how Dick had chosen to interpret the fact that more often than not he’d woken up to Alfred the cat purring on his chest.

Still, the fact remained that Dick lived alone, and he kept such unreliable hours, what with his Nightwing persona taking up most of his nights, that having a pet would be selfish and careless. In fact, it was because of their shared lifestyle that he’d never suggested that Jason get a pet even if Dick thought it would be good for him and oh damn it, there he went, thinking about Jason again.

With a sigh, he placed his keys in their usual spot beside the door before toeing out of his shoes. He hung up his jacket, and moved toward the kitchen, not noticing at first that there was someone reclining on his couch in spite of having turned the lights on when he entered.


Dick spun around so fast he was distantly afraid he’d just reopened his wounds. Jason was sitting up, sans helmet and domino, and raising an eyebrow in incredulity. 

“What if I’d been an axe murderer?”

“Did you come in through the window in civvies?” was what came out of Dick’s mouth.

Jason shrugged dismissively.

“No one saw. Probably.”

He was putting on an air of nonchalance. Most people wouldn’t have been able to tell, but Dick had been trained in body language from a young age, by the very same man who had trained Jason to control his. Jason was faking, covering something up.

Dick latched onto that mystery with something akin to desperation, anything to distract him from his mind blaring alarms about how Jason looked so good it was criminal, and oh, wouldn’t he look just delicious in handcuffs? Stupid brain, being stupid and unhelpful.

“So, what brings you here, Little Wing? Something you need?”

And now Jason was also being uncooperative by having the audacity to blush. Adorable. Utterly inconvenient.

“Actually, I wanted to talk. About, you know…” Uh-oh. Involuntarily, Dick tensed as if to prepare for an attack. “I was talking to Babs about it, and then I talked to Roy, and, you know, they said things…”

Dick did not know. What the hell? The adrenaline ebbed away, leaving him mostly confused.


“Do you actually like my leg? Legs? Even when not on drugs?“ 

Jason scratched his head, looking equal parts confused and embarrassed. It worked for him though, and was that a hint of hopefulness he detected? Could it be? Emboldened, Dick couldn’t help but blurt out,

“Yes!” Well, alright. Time to face the music. “I like, uh, all of you. Actually.”

Timidly, he shifted his weight from foot to foot. What if he’d misread the situation? What if Roy was gonna pop out with a hidden camera any second, and his confession would go viral, open for mockery across the world?

Jason was staring at him. The moment stretched on, until Jason’s face broke into a grin. Was this going to be the hidden camera reveal? Dick tried to subtly check behind the couch. Could that shadow be someone hiding there?

“Dickie…” Jason’s awestruck voice drew his eyes back to his fellow vigilante. “I like all of you, too.”

Oh. Dick’s worries melted away as swiftly as they’d come. He started to grin, and Jason let out a delighted laugh, stepping closer.

“Well, besides your absurd love affair with that awful cereal, but I’m willing to overlook that.”

“Very big of you,” Dick laughed, wrapping one arm around Jason’s neck, pulling his head down into a soft kiss.

Jason laughed into the kiss and Dick felt like he was full of bubbles, like the world had been dull and gray, but now it was full of swirling colors.

Wrote this on mobile, in bed, it’s almost 1 am, will clean up tomorrow!

Edited to add: it is now tomorrow and I’ve posted it on AO3 here.

This is a short piece from an AU I have where Bruce and Clark met during Bruce’s Batman training. Years later, they’ve been married since before they were heroes, but no one knows. Until Batman is caught kissing Clark Kent.

“You knew Jimmy was there!”

“I- You know how much of a distraction you are, and it was on top of a building full of reporters-”

“You.” Bruce whirled around, jamming his finger into the man’s chest. “Are lying to me. And you are still bad at it.” Kal was quiet for a long moment, standing in place. At long length, his shoulders wilted.

“I… I didn’t plan it, but- but I did notice him,” he admitted, pained.

“Before or after you kissed me?” Bruce challenged. Kal’s silence said it all. “What the hell were you thinking?!”


“What kind of PR can I spin about this?! Batman doesn’t do press!”


Don’t you dare make a joke about him ‘doing’ the press right now.

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Originally posted by gawston

(A/N: Originally named Untitled.)

“You want to learn how to read?’ Belle repeated, cautiously. As excited as she was at the prospect of having another reader in town, the beauty felt rather suspicious. After all, you were Gaston’s friend, and she wouldn’t put it past him to recruit you into helping woo her.

You bit your lip frustrated. The anger within you threatening to break free as you answered, ‘yes’ for the millionth time. Seriously? What did Gaston see in her again? Sure, she was incredibly beautiful, but other than that the two held nothing in common.

“But… why?” She questioned.

You about near lost it. “Look if you don’t want to teach me fine. I’ll find someone else to do it!”

That was a lie. The only readers in town were Belle, her father, Pere Robert, and surprisingly Gaston. The last two who you held too much pride to ask, and the third a most definite ‘no’ if his daughter refused you. “No. No, I’ll teach you. It’s just…. you’ve never had any real interest in reading before, (Y/N).” Belle replied.

Oh. Oh! Now you understood the reluctance. “Trust me, your the last person, I’d try to set Gaston up with.” You snorted. “I’m asking for this favor for my own personal gain. No matter how humiliating it is.”

“I see.” The sharpness of your tone threw Belle back a little, but you weren’t exactly known for being tactful of people. In fact if there was anyone considered funnier than her, it would be you…the town’s idiot.

“So are you going to teach me or what?” You huffed. Despite looking away Belle could see the bit of redness in your cheeks. It was actually kind of adorable.

“Alright, meet me by the laundry area later this afternoon. We’ll start then.” Belle instructed.

“Great.” You answered. A smile adorning your face for the first time during the whole conversation.

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Dating Jughead Jones Would Include...

Originally posted by aestheticsprouse

Request: “Could you please do a ‘Dating Would Include’ for Jughead? Thanks in advance!”

Requested by: Anonymous

Requests are: Open

(I do NOT own the gif)

Note From Author: Thank you so much for requesting, Anon! I loved doing this, Jughead is literally bae, so I hope you enjoy it! :)


  • Road trips.
  • Stealing his beanie to make him mad.
  • Never leaving each others side.
  • Movie marathons.
  • Being the first person he lets read any new additions to his novel.
  • Lowkey PDA.
  • Especially when he’s jealous.
  • Being there for him any time something bad happens with his dad.
  • Cuddles.
  • Really stupid ship names.
  • Veronica and Kevin are to blame.
  • Jughead always playing with your hair.
  • Study nights.
  • Him not liking the fact that you’re best friends with Reggie.
  • Him not letting you meet his father until months after you started dating.
  • He was afraid that he would scare you away.
  • Late night talks about absolutely everything.
  • Makeout sessions underneath the football bleachers.
  • “You’re lucky I love you. This is literally the only time I would ever step foot on a high school football field. I can feel the cells leaving my brain just thinking about it.”
  • Helping him and Betty investigate Jason’s murder.
  • You being the first one to say ‘I love you’.
  • Him always holding your hand or touching your thigh.
  • Forcing him to stay with you and your parents whenever you find out that he’s homeless.
  • Your parents love him thought, so they welcome him with open arms.
  • Being the only person he let’s wear his beanie.
  • “It looks good on you, love.”
  • “I know. Maybe you should let me have it.”
  • “I’d break up with you before I let you take that beanie out of my sight.”
  • Being just as sarcastic and sassy as he is.
  • Forehead kisses.
  • Crying with Jughead whenever he gets upset about his family issues.
  • Nightly walks.
  • Cutting off his worries or rants with kisses.
  • Never leaving each others side before saying ‘I love you’.
  • You never know when it could be the last time.
  • Always being there for each other, no matter what.

TAG LIST: @crazyrabbitslaughing

A healthy relationship while having BPD doesn’t mean you never have incidents or meltdowns or splitting or lash out.

That means having complete control over your BPD. While having a lot of control is important, complete control is fucking impossible. It’d be like requiring me to not have any fibromyalgia symptoms that could hurt or disrupt my partner in order to have a healthy relationship. It’s not possible.

What DOES determine a healthy relationship is how you communicate and do damage control and take responsibility and be accountable and LISTEN and ask questions.

I tell my partners when my brain is being an asshole.

“Hey, I keep thinking you’re stupid for this. I don’t actually believe this, or feel this way, but I’m BPD splitting. I thought u should know. It’s not u, don’t worry. I’m sorry if I get impatient or split or lash out. Let me know if anything bothers you, okay?”

It’s not that you never split, you never say stupid shit or hurt each other or lash out or fight (even if it’s just because your brain wants a fight). It’s that you accomodate that and account for it with communication. It’s hard to learn and no one teaches you it. But you can do it.

And that’s literally ANY relationship, whether someone in it is sick, or not. Almost always, relationships get hurt and fuck up and heal, just like the people in them. Like everyone.

Healthy relationships don’t require being healthy.

Cedric Diggory x Reader: Stolen

Warnings: Swearing, crude humor, mention of knives but not threateningly

Requested by: Anonymous

“Yannatos, Wilkins.”

“Griswold, Hale.”

“Diggory, Armistead.”

“Y/L/N, Malfoy.”

Snape finished the list with a drawl, and the potion’s class scrambled to find their assigned partners. Hoping to be placed with her boyfriend, Cedric Diggory, Y/N sighed and tried to catch his glance from across the room. Cedric placed his bookbag on the table and cast a look at Y/N, his golden eyes glimmering in the dim dungeons. He looked relatively sour, but trying to keep in good spirits.

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Accountable: Arrow 5x14 Review (The Sin-Eater)

As Anatoly explained, a sin-eater is someone who consumes a ritual meal to magically take on the sins of another person, thus absolving the person and saving their soul.

Christianity has another name for this person: Jesus Christ. The son of God who died for our sins. The concept that superheroes are Christ like figures is nothing new, and is certainly one I’ve written about before. However, “The Sin- Eater” is as close as Arrow has ever come to a literal comparison.  Oliver Queen has a history of taking others’ sins upon himself. Essentially, blaming himself for their wrongs. As if somehow taking responsibility for them will save them.

If Christ died for our sins, if that action of selfless love is our salvation, then why do we ever need to be held accountable for our sins? Aren’t we already forgiven?

Sorry, but that’s just not the way it works. There is nothing we can ever do that will stop God from loving us, but that does not prevent us from seeking His mercy. Yes, Christ died for our sins, but we must be held accountable for those sins. We have to seek forgiveness. We have to desire salvation in order to truly achieve it. The door to God is always open. There’s nothing we can ever do to close it, but we still must make the choice to walk through it.

So, is Oliver Queen really saving anyone by being a sin-eater? Or maybe the better question is…  is Oliver even worthy of the title?

Let’s dig in…

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Cross Them Lines - Part 2

Summary: Reader and Chris Evans have been childhood best friends. She wakes up the next morning in his bed.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Part 1

A/N: I admit I am a very slow writer. For which, I do apologize. Anyway…I’ll do my best to get this fic out as much as I can. Your feedback is always welcome :)

I am not sure what it was exactly that woke me. I felt a little disoriented so I remained still until I could get my bearings.

I was covered up, all warm and cozy. My throat was dry and my head throbbed a little, clearly indicating I’d had a night of drinking. There was an arm wrapped around my waist. The palm rested on my bare stomach. Was I naked? I sneaked a peek and was very much relieved to find that I was not.

The body attached to the arm was happily spooning me. Ugh. Dave. But then I remembered. The blonde. The “accident.” I had broken up with him right after. Unless…unless I was too stupid for my own good and had actually gotten back together with him.

Cursing myself internally, I glanced around the bedroom, trying my damnest to decipher clues as much as my disoriented brain could manage. It was too uncluttered to be Dave’s bedroom. That dumbass would leave literally everything everywhere.


This was Chris’s bedroom. I was being spooned by Chris’s warmth.

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I’m just a cunt.
I am only a set of holes.
I have no brains.
I have no other use.
I am just rape-fuckmeat.
A dumb cock-sleeve.
A pathetic cum-dump.
For Men to use.
For Men to abuse.
I’m worthless.
I am a slut.
A filthy whore.
Desperate for cock.
Starving for cum.
I deserve to be beaten.
I need to be degraded.
Please use me as a public urinal.
A public whore.
Rape me.
Destroy my fuck-holes.
Tell me how it’s all my fault.
For being so dumb. For wearing what I’m wearing. For being so drunk. For being stupid. For being such a whore. For leading you on. For being too fat/thin. For not being prettier. I’m a whore.
A slut.
Unless I’m servicing Men.
Pleasuring Men.
Like the good cum-dump I am.


Originally posted by imaginesofthings




“Have you ever even heard of a brush?”

“I should be asking you that. My hair is flawless, yours looks like a bird’s nest!”

“At least I can get birds! You like to think you’re soooo smooth with the ladies. News flash: You’re not!”

“Coming from the woman who hasn’t had a date in 4 years!”

“I’ve had offers!”

“Yeah sure you have. It’s more believable that I love Lucius Malfoy than you being asked on a date.”

“It’s because I’m a nice person. A term you’re NOT FAMILIAR WITH.”








The screams of Sirius Black and Y/N Y/L/N could be heard from down the corridor. Young Gryffindor’s scarpered away from their common room as fast as possible, they decided it’d be safer to just go to their next lesson without their books.

Screaming matches between the two were a common occurrence and it usually ended with objects and hexes being thrown. Usually James Potter and Remus Lupin stepped before it got to violent but sometimes even they were unable to calm them down.

However, it was difficult for people to say that Sirius and Y/N hated each other because half the time they were teaming up to prank people and they always had the others back. On the other hand, they argued just as much and would take any opportunity to belittle the other.

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BTS Reaction to Your Bad Korean Language ~Jin & Yoongi~

Anon asked: Hello can I ask BTS reacting to you spelling or writing something wrong in korean (which is not your original language)? ily, thank you 😘

A/N: For this one I changed it, only a little bit, to you saying something wrong instead of writing. I hope this is what you’re looking for. If not, I will rewrite it. 

( ˘ ³˘)❤

kim seokjin

“I just don’t understand, I thought I was saying the right thing. I’m so sorry.” You apologized to Jin for what seemed like the thousandth time.  Today was supposed to be a perfect day, but it turned out to be the opposite. You & your boyfriend Jin had been dating for a few months now, & he wanted to finally introduce you to his family. You were already nervous because Korean wasn’t your first language & now he wanted you to meet his family. It was a huge step in your relationship & you wanted to make sure that you didn’t do anything that could possibly jeopardize your relationship with him. You wanted to impress his family so much that you spent hours trying to learn various Korean phrases & words to say to them. When Jin finally arrived to your house to pick you up, you were a nervous wreck. You were having a mental battle, about to tell Jin that maybe you should meet his family later, but it was too late. His car was already parked in front of their house. Your heart dropped in your chest, but with a reassuring smile & kiss, you gained little confidence & was ready to greet his parents. 

When the door to their home opened & you were standing face-to-face with them, all of the Korean you learned, or attempted to learn, went out the window, like completely vanished from your mind & you were a mess. During dinner you were asked several questions & you tried to answer them as best you could, but your nerves took over & you said whatever came to mind, much to Jin & his parent’s horror. Which is why you were currently in his car, after an awkward dinner, nearly crying your eyes out. “It’s okay honey, I know you didn’t mean any harm.” he said trying to soothe you by rubbing small circles onto your back. “B-but Jin, I called your mom an old goose & I told your father I love to eat your d*ck! Your d*ck, Jin!” You cried into his shoulder as he tried to keep from laughing, remembering the terrified look on his parents face after you’d said that. You were trying to tell his mother she looked beautiful in her dress, but instead you told her she looked like an old goose. And you were attempting to tell his father that you loved to eat Jin’s meatballs that he cooks with noodles, but you told him you loved to eat Jin’s d*ck. It was an absolute nightmare. You couldn’t possibly face his parents again after saying such things. “Listen, they weren’t completely upset. I explained to them that your Korean isn’t perfect, so they understand. Don’t worry your pretty little head.” Jin reassured kissing your forehead, hoping to make you forget about your little mistake.

min yoongi

Hours before Yoongi was to pick you up to meet his friends, you sat in your bedroom practicing your Korean, which was nothing more than you googling certain words & phrases from Google Translate. You wrote down some words that you assumed would be correct to say when you would greet them, onto the palm of your hand. When you felt like you were prepared enough, Yoongi finally arrived to your house. You were so scared, you wouldn’t let go of his hand until he had to unlock the door of the dorm they all lived in. He walked you into the living room where two of them were, playing video games & shouting at each other. Yoongi coughed & immediately got their attention. They turned to you as the room filled with silence. You looked nervously at Yoongi who just eyed the boys, annoyed. “Seriously V, Jungkook, I tell you Y/n is coming over & you make a huge mess of this place.” he groaned. 

“Sorry.” the two boys mumbled. Just then a boy comes prancing in with a huge smile on his face. “Hello! My name is Jung Hoseok, but you can call me J-Hope. I’m your hope. I’m your angel.” he says excitedly.  You smiled politely at him & mustered up the courage to speak, taking a quick look at your palm & to your horror, the sweat from your hand caused the writing to smear, making it barely readable. You nearly had a mental breakdown. You tried to remember the Korean phrase that meant Hello my name is… but your brain was so scattered, you said the first thing that came to mind, much to your horror. You accidentally introduced yourself as Yoongi’s pet dog instead of his partner which caused the boys to burst into laughter. “I think Min Holly is not going to like this.” the boy whose name you learned is Jungkook, said with a grin on his face. You hid behind your boyfriend with an embarrassed look on your face. At the moment you just wanted to scream at yourself for being so stupid. 

The rest of the members will come soon! I just decided to break this one up. JH & RM will be the next. And then the maknae line. :) 

~Love, kissesfrombangtanatnight 💋

The Suit Doesn’t Make the Man

For @jlsadphoenix, who wanted platonic hurt/comfort between Peter and Tony

Send me a request! List of fandoms and ships here

A/N: I wrote Trans!Peter bc I love the idea of Tony being super supportive Iron Dad who loves his Trans Spider Son soooo

The wind felt nice against Peter’s cheeks. They were hot, and wet, so the wind chilled his skin. He sat crouched at the top of a building. He had been sitting there only for a few minutes, trying to get himself to stop crying, to stop choking on sobs, telling himself over and over “come on, Peter, it doesn’t matter.” But the tears kept coming.

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