I’m a little late but here’s my addition to the trend:
Aliens are super confused about the humans ability to make connections. Like, we can look at something that shows no resemblance to ourselves and say “same”. Or we have favourite movies and songs because they remind us slightly if a good memory, person, or experience. What if that trigger in our brain that goes off when we see something vaguely familiar just doesn’t happen with interglacial species?
Human: dude, look at this is so me!
Alien: that’s just a picture of a cat.
Human: but look at the cats face.
Human: I love this song! It makes me think of road trips.
Alien: this song is called “the man”, it doesn’t reference roads, cars, or trips.
Human: yeah but just listen to the tune, it has that road trip ~vibe~ ya know?
i’ve been binging on “humans are weird/space orc” posts and i love them all and on the topic of humans being terrifying predators -
human response - especially among the youngsters of today with their extreme nihilism - to a problem is smash it/hit it/destroy it/kill it
“human steve the machine isn’t working” steve looks at i for a minute, fiddles with a cable “idk man, just hit it, it should work”
*sees a spider* SMASH “HUMAN why did you kill the spider??? it did nothing wrong??????” “don’t tell amy she’s a nature-fan, but i don’t like spiders in my room and i’m not gonna show it out politely”
alien overhears a conversation between two humans “the whole thing’s like broken five ways to hell” “throw it out the window.” “… yeah. sounds fair”
“what if i just…. whoosh” “if you just what, human lily?” “just whoosh. into the sun. would that be rad or what.” alien stares in mild horror at the species with no sense of self-preservation that still is somehow alive and thriving on a death world that gives them so many opportunities to be killed. which they seem to have a fascination with.
There were about five fleets at a rest stop. Nothing out of the norm. Some were talking, some were just relaxing, and some were getting snacks. Just a regular rest stop. All the humans basically flocked together and started talking about everything going on in their lives. Being rowdy like their usual selves. But then they just… got quiet and started whispering and nodding. As if agreeing on something that they didnt want any other species to hear. Faul-iar found it suspcious. Everyone did but… who really wants to confront a uman and question them about their plans? Who? Exactly. No one.
Once the humasn seemed to have come to an agreement, they just… dispersed throughout the room. And then it was quiet. Prior to the humans, quiet was good. Quiet was tranquil. Quiet meant no fighting or war. But everytime a human is quiet… theyre usually up to something. Unless its a human who is quiet in general. But it wasnt just one quiet human. All the humans were quiet. All the non humans just started awkwardly and worriedly glancing at eachother. Trying to brace themselves from what was about to happen.
“Penis.” Oh, that was Marie who said that. Faul-iar was immediately confused. Saying the proper name for a human male’s genitals out of nowhere was really… weird.
“Penis!” Rosa said it this time, and they said it louder than Marie. They stuck their tongue out at Marie.
“Penis!” Lana yelled out. All of the non humans just looked extremely confused, but not worried. They only got worried when whatever the humans were doing escalated to all of them yelling penis at the top of their lungs.
Were they under attack!? Was this a warning?! Every nonhuman started scrambling back to their respective ships. The humans just kept continuing what they were doing til they noticed their respecctive crews rushing back to their ships. And then… they laugehd! All of the humans laughed! They were under danger of an attack and the humans were laughing!
One of the humans from Faul-iar’s ship, Ava, started explaining everything. SHe made sure to yell so everyone could here.”You guys calm the fuck down! Its just a game!”
Fau-liar was just… xe didnt know how to react. Xe just stared dumbly in confusion.
So humans… shouted out the proper name for a human male’s genitals…. just for fun?