this is important you should know

anonymous asked:

I hate that I'm easily hurt by criticism. I don't want to care about everything everyone says, so how do I know when to care? Thanks (isfp)

It’s not pleasant to be criticized and it’s hard to go through life without having to hear some criticism, therefore, it is indeed important to be able to know when criticism is constructive. First, your attitude towards criticism should be one of taking an opportunity to learn something about yourself. Second, and this might be a bit harder, you have to know what the person’s intentions really are. For example:

  • Some people criticize because they genuinely care about you and have your best interests at heart. Perhaps they see you going down the wrong road and they really want to help. This doesn’t necessarily mean they are right but it does mean that you should hear them out, then reflect and be honest with yourself about whether they are making a good point or not. If they are, then listen and adjust. This is a great way to grow as a person when you have trouble seeing yourself objectively.
  • Some people criticize because they are trying to manipulate your perception/feelings for their own selfish (hidden) agenda. Obviously, you should be wary of these people as they might be trying to gaslight you in order to gain more control over your decision making process. Emotional abusers tend to do this because creating a state of constant self-doubt in you will slowly erode your self-esteem, which will give them a chance to take more control over you.
  • Some people criticize because they have an axe to grind. Perhaps they have some weird personal investment/vendetta/obsession in wanting to influence you, dominate you, or undermine you, or to avenge some perceived “wrong” they feel. Perhaps they are (subconsciously) acting out of envy or jealousy, which might only serve to bring you down to their level if you engage (thus proving their point in believing you’re not all that great and deserve criticism). You should be wary because they’re not thinking about your best interests, rather, they’re misdirecting/displacing their negative emotions and you just happen to be the unlucky dumping ground.
  • Some people criticize because they project their flaws/issues onto you and it’s easier/safer to criticize you rather than face themselves, especially if they view you as being inferior and an easy target (for example, some cases of homophobia). These people are rather pitiful and it’s a good idea to ignore them until they go away and bug someone else. Engaging with them is usually a bad idea because they will not be open to hearing what you say. Even if you speak the truth, they will see everything you say/do as an “excuse”/“defense”, which might only energize them to criticize/attack harder.
  • Sometimes someone you dislike criticizes you and you might be tempted to ignore them just based on your feelings about them. In such a case, you have to differentiate between “who” is saying it and the “content” of what is being said. Just look at the facts of what was said or imagine that it was someone you like saying it, then you can evaluate the criticism more objectively. This is a good idea during sensitive discussions about politics or religion. Remember that moral issues are rarely black and white, so someone can criticize you from a place of having conviction in their values and principles and it doesn’t necessarily make them a “bad” person though you disagree with them. Criticisms can be discussed openly and calmly if both people are emotionally mature enough.

There are other reasons why people criticize but I think you get the idea. Pay attention to HOW people criticize, whether they focus on an idea, a particular behavior/action/decision of yours, a correction of a mistake, etc OR whether they’re making an unwarranted and excessively personal attack to influence your emotions/self-esteem (the equivalent of childish name-calling or button-pushing) - if it’s an unwarranted personal attack, then it’s probably their issue, not yours. Be honest with yourself and you will know whether the criticism is valid or not. If it’s not valid and their intention is not to help or care for you (or, worse, their intention is to control or harm you), then you would be right to ignore or resist as necessary. However, if there’s something negative/unpleasant about yourself you don’t want to see and that’s the real reason you’re reacting against the criticism, then ignoring it would be detrimental to your personal growth.

you know i always thought it was a bit odd how people who are in love with the word q*eer and proudly identify as that refuse to allow the word lesbian the same kind of treatment. 

they’ll go on and on about the history of the word q*eer and how it’s important to let people identify as that, and how it should never be censored and called a slur despite it’s history but the moment they see hardships involved with the word lesbian it becomes “its a dirty sex word what do you expect :/”  and so much shaming/dismissing over the idea of ever trying to reclaim it.

 i see so much “well just use a different word” in response to lesbians venting over the censorship and sexualization of their identity from the q*eer community.  i see so much people who identify as  q*eer acting as if lesbian is a dirty word that should never be used.  it just sucks and i don’t understand how people who go “my identity isn’t a slur uwu”  will in the next breath go “well maybe you shouldnt call yourself a l*sbian if you want to be treated like a human being :/ “

4| Maux De Coeur

When you left to your apartment near the dorm, Hoseok and Jimin were left uncomfortable. They didn’t know if they should text you or maybe try to go at your place to help you… but when they turned at Taehyung that’s when they understood this was gonna be way more complicated. The boy’s eyes were empty, his face showed no emotion. The two others felt squeezed by the situation. You or Taehyung? It was a decision that was important enough to make them want to rip their hair off. 

Jimin got his phone out and gattered the courage to send you a text.

He sighed and closed his phone as him, Hoseok and Taehyung headed back inside where they would find all the other boys sitting waiting for them.

“What the hell happened?” Asked Yoongi in his normal cold tone, “we could hear (y/n) yelling from up here.”

Jin looked suspiciously at the trio.

“You didn’t do anything to her, I hope?” He said.

Hoseok and Jimin exchanged a look before looking at Taehyung.

“Well… It wasn’t really our fault…” started Jimin

In the end of a sea of explanation, they understood the situation and decided they add to do something about it. An idea was found, they knew you wouldn’t resist to go and so Jungkook texted you to know your answer.

-Jungkook point of view briefly-

っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ [Hoseok x reader x Jimin ft. BTS] Bangtan text serie where the reader is a girl member of Bangtan and she discovers her best friend, Taehyung, wants to date the person she dislikes the most. Adding to this, ends up she doesn’t get along with the other girlfriends of the boys. Her only supports are Hoseok and Jimin, but even with their help, she slowly starts to think she might leave the band.

Masterlist Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 5 (Soon) ♥

anonymous asked:

Hey can you make the hc for a stronger s/o but with Sanji, Law, and Marco? <33


  • Stronger or not he’ll always be there to protect you
  • He’ll still treat you like a soft baby
  • But he’s really happy to know you’re stronger, he know he can worry a little less
  • Even if he still worry anyway
  • He like to watch you fight. Looking at you kicking butt is really really nice


  • He don’t really care
  • He just think it’s nice to have someone strong in the crew who can protect them when he’s not around
  • You’re seen like the parents of the crew.
  • There’s day where he slightly get competitive and want to fight you
  • But he quickly remind himself that it’s not something important and he should focus on something else


  • He’s curious.
  • How much are you stronger than him ? There’s really no chance for him to defeat you ?
  • He’ll try to fight you. Several times. But it’ll depend of his mood
  • So this happen maybe once or twice a month
  • He’s really happy to fight by your side without worrying for you, he feel like his shoulder are lighter

anonymous asked:

How was the women's march pointless? There were thousands of BLM protestors there as well, me being one of them. I know y'all like to pull out the subtle misogyny when talking about racism, but y'all gotta stop. That march was important for black and other POC women too. Stop putting down women because you assume they're all white and therefore deserve this shit. You really show your true sexist colours sometimes you know that?

The march was pointless squared. If they wanted to do something they should have showed up to vote. You think holding white women accountable is sexist because of course you do. LOL I don’t give a shit about mainstream feminism and tears after the fact you can unfollow me how bout dat?

anonymous asked:

Empiricism is the only thing preventing people from solipsism.

if empiricism is the only thing keeping people from solipsism (which personally i dont reckon it is), then solipsists they should be if you ask me.

 empiricism is obviously very useful in the scientific sphere, and shouldn’t be in any way divorced from its importance there.

however, empiricism cannot provide certainty, which is exactly what you need to get out of solipsism. the solipsist doubts their sensory evidence, not to say it is necessarily false but just that you can never know that something you experience through sense is 100% true. you can choose to accept that yourself, sure, but solipsism makes a much more compelling argument from logical doubt against sense data, because how could we know sense data has truth value objectively?  

so yeah, ive got to disagree with you personally. i think there are plenty of other challenges to solipsism that are worth considering (such as people’s belief in god, which is easy to scoff at, but like their belief in god comes from a place of faith, as does belief in truth of sense data). i also think that the empirical challenge isnt a massively strong one. its not meant for challenging solipsism, because it just sort of begs the question. the solipsist asks ‘how can we trust anything outside out minds to be real as our senses are deceivable?’ the empiricist reply is ‘all knowledge comes from sense data’. solipsism is kind of a different order of thing. they dont really address each other, if you feel me. thanks for a thought provoking statement though dude. love conor xo

me: *has 83749 unfinished drawings, hasn’t learned more than two songs on guitar, hasn’t studied french or norwegian in weeks, grades are dropping at an alarming rate*

also me: huh… i wanna start writing again :)


my heart: but this stuff makes her happy and give her a sense of purpose and are good for her mental health! :// should we really value school over her wellbeing? just thinking about school makes me sad :(

my creativity: i agree wholeheartedly with heart!! we all know the most important thing about life is to pursuit one’s passions!! what even is the point if she’s not doing what she really loves!! honestly logic, i think you and anxiety are just mad cause you both know she listens to me and heart way more than she listens to you both. just face it, you’re the least valued side

my logical side: this is not a competition!! she needs to stop picking up all these hobbies and focus on one thing: SHE’S!! FAILING!! SCHOOL!! and if she does fail Anxiety will cry and we both will have so much work to do

my anxiety: *constantly tugging at her hair* *screaming in distress*


ALL my current WIP for Halloween! I am planning on having most my little preview photos be taken with other peoples sims if they allow me :) I asked on my other blog so here I am asking here- if you wouldnt mind your sim being involved in a kinda halloween party foth a few of my sims and some others, please let me know! I would adore having more around for the party. 

All kinds of sims are welcome, alpha, berry, or anything else because verity is important and no ones sim type should be left behind! I also need sims of different ages, since I want to have something for every age at Halloween time :) 

anonymous asked:

I just wanted to say, the person who said "Shame on you" should be ashamed. If there's only thing a littles should "untie" on, it's the idea of respecting and honoring boundaries and not crossing comfort lines. That is probably the most important part in interacting with a little, and to say one should be ashamed because you dislike the rules she sets for herself is terrible. I'm sorry you had to deal with such a rude ask.

It just bothers me because my blog is a safe place for EVERYONE yet so many people cant respect my rules. I have nothing against interaction with NSFW blogs. I just don’t like them reblogging my selfies. Everything else is okay. That isn’t asking so much. If NSFW bloggers really want to let me know they like my face or whatever as weird as that sounds, they can message me instead. I have no problem with that. I just don’t want my face on a NSFW page. Thats it 😭

I’m not really mean right? 😥

anonymous asked:

Doing stuff that is for your betterment doesn't not make you selfish. There's a difference between selfish and self preservation. Trying to save yourself isn't selfish, its what you should do. You need to live for yourself and hiding who you are to please people is not you being yourself

technically, i know this. i would tell this everyone else, that sometimes you have to take care of yourself first. but the thing is that i grew up thinking that everyone else was soo much more important than me and that my feelings didnt matter at all. I made big sacrifices for people without really thinking about how things could effect me and frankly, i didnt really care. i felt like a person in the background of someone else’s much more important life and the whole meaning why i exist was to make everyone else’s life easier/better. thats why i can’t handle hurting people. thats why i cant handle when people dont accept my help. in 1st grade i pushed a boy off a bench and he didnt accept my apology. i cried for days and i felt guilty every time i saw him until we went on different schools. when i was a kid and saw another kid that i didnt even know crying, i cried too. every time. because i just wanted to burden everyone’s problems so everyone could be happy. well, except me, but that wasnt important. anyway, i think you get my point. i hate this situation. i hate putting my needs in front of others. i can’t stand it. i just want everyone else to be happy. it doesnt matter that its for my health, I feel like the most selfish person on the planet.

❗️Things you should know about the Graham-Cassidy Healthcare Bill ❗️

• There is not enough time between now and September 30 to get an accurate CBO score that tells us how many people will lose coverage as well as what the bill will cost, and that is inexcusable.

• It ends individual and employer mandates, which will drive premiums up. It will also end federal subsidies for individual insurance. This is estimated to leave 32 million people uninsured.

• It takes the money going to the states that opted ‘in’ to Medicaid expansion and distributes it among all states, even those whose legislatures irresponsibly voted against expansion. In 2026, funding for Medicaid expansion would end entirely, and the shortfall would be left for the states to cover.

• It institutes a one year freeze on Medicaid reimbursements for Planned Parenthood (even though federal law already prohibits federal tax dollars being used to fund or finance abortion services)

• It allows individual states to define what constitutes an “essential benefit”, which will likely result in a slash of coverage for maternity services, cancer treatments and services, ER visits, prescription drugs, and many more benefits. This could also further prevent women’s clinics from charging Medicaid for things like cancer screenings and birth control.

• It allows insurers to double their surcharge for elderly patients. (The ACA allows insurers to charge older customers up to 3 times as much as younger ones. This bill increases that to up to 5 times as much.)

• It allows insurers to charge higher rates based on health status, and it repeals language in the ACA which prevents changing insurance rates after a patient is diagnosed with a condition.

This is not a drill, friends. Call your senators. We have until the 30th.

202-224-3121 -> US Capitol Switchboard. This will connect you directly with the senate office you request.

ResistBot is another great resource. If you text 'resist’ to 50409, you can fax straight to your senators office by texting what you want to say.

TL:DR; the healthcare bill still sucks. Call your senators. Information on how above ^^

  • You are worthy even if you are disabled.
  • You are worthy even if you cannot work or hold a job
  • You are worthy even if you cannot support yourself.
  • You are worthy even if you cost your loved ones a lot of money because of your medical care
  • you are worthy even if you are homeless

How you are treated speaks to the people in power and their priorities, not your inherent worth as a human being. You are beautiful, special, and important & your life matters. I know you didn’t ask to be sick or disabled, and anything that happened bc of that is not your fault. I love you <3 

Okay kids today we’re gonna talk about Edmonia Lewis

Edmonia was a sculptor in the 19th century, and was half African-American and half Native American. She was one of the first people of colour from America to earn international fame and success for her artwork. She started sculpting during the civil war and trained under some of the most influential abolitionist sculptors of the time.

Not only was she a successful WOC artist, but she sculpted other people of colour in the neoclassical style:

Forever Free (1867)

Old Arrow-Maker and his Daughter (1866)

The Marriage of Hiawatha (1866)

Do you know how rare it was in the 19th century to have a piece of artwork show black people or Native Americans without them being ‘savages’ or half naked? Let me tell you, it’s pretty damn rare.

She would purposely leave her women more clothed than her male figures to desexualise them, and I probably don’t need to tell you why that was important at this time (if you really want to see how white artists saw black women, look up American Slave and The Virginian Slave).

Unfortunately she was made to make her female figures look more European as she got backlash accusing her of inserting herself into figures BUT they’re still hugely impressive given that most famous sculptors at this time had teams of people working on their work and adding all the details by hand, whereas Edmonia did absolutely everything herself.

Basically I think about Edmonia Lewis a lot and I think more people should know about her.


Its has been a pretty harsh week for me, I need more loving Jumin as father on my dash :P Will update this AU once in a while

Also if anyone confuse, Junha is my OC , daughter of Jumin and MC. && I believe Jumin will spoil his daughter (rotten)

More on this series:
Junha AU - Birth
Junha AU - Father’s Day

Unusual topics

One of the most important rules in language learning is to learn relevant vocabulary but when you are intermediate/advanced you need to know more than “usual” topics and while i was on holiday i started to write down topics that i have never focused on and i thought i should share that list.

  • Med terms
  • Computers 
  • Gardening
  • Flower names
  • Rock names
  • Cooking verbs
  • Synonyms for usual verbs (e.g. to laugh - to chuckle - to giggle)
  • Fabrics and patterns
  • Construction materials
  • Bones
  • Hobbies/Crafting (e.g. knitting)
  • Objects around the house (e.g. broom, photo frame etc)
  • More musical instruments
  • Idioms
  • Politics
  • Beauty products
  • Swear words
  • Face
  • Cake/ ice cream flavours
  • Driving terms
  • Sport equipment
  • Mental disorders
  • Slang words, abbreviations
  • Phrasal verbs
  • Hand (e.g. knuckles, pinky)
  • Foot (e.g. sole, arch, big toe)
  • Tongue twisters
  • Flirting 
  • Astronomy


The Code for the Ash Cap Pikachu is

At first this was confirmed for NA games only, but apparently it should work for PAL as well?
Please get on mystery gift and let me know!

Edit: IMPORTANT The date you redeem it affects which pikachu you will get!

9/19/17 – 9/25/17: Original hat (Kanto and Johto regions)

9/26/17 – 10/2/17: Hoenn region hat

10/3/17 – 10/9/17: Sinnoh region hat

10/10/17 – 10/16/17: Unova region hat

10/17/17 – 10/23/17: Kalos region hat

10/24/17 – 10/30/17: Alola region hat

Are you sure?
  • Harry: You don't have to do it... I mean-
  • Draco: No, I want to. Are you sure it's what you want?
  • Harry: Yes, absolutely. I just don't want you to feel like I'm pressuring you into this.
  • Draco: No, no! You're not. I just don't want you to regret it afterwards.
  • Harry: I would never!
  • Draco: Are you sure? I feel like-
  • Ron: Oh my god, will you two just pick a dessert and be done with it already?

a-sisi-universe  asked:

i love your blog, could you do a drabble in which draco is really obviously flirting and harry is super oblivious, and the draco gives up and kisses him? thanks in advance!!

((I hope you don’t mind, I combined your prompt with one very vague anon prompt…also, I accidentally wrote 1.2k instead of a tiny drabble so I figured you may forgive me.))

“You don’t understand!  After the end of the year, I don’t really see us being around each other much.  I feel like I’m running out of time.  If I don’t do something soon, I’ll lose my chance with him forever!” Draco said.

“Poor thing, can’t imagine what it’s like to lose your chance with a crush, forever, only to be stuck in a toilet, forever…” Myrtle sobbed.

Draco was very used to navigating the ghost’s moodswings, “Of course you can. That’s why you are so important to me.  I didn’t go to any of my other friends, did I?  And I didn’t start talking about myself until after I fixed the lock on your favorite stall?”

Myrtle sniffled. “I guess.  But maybe he just doesn’t like boys.”

“I asked Weasely if he did,” Draco said, “and it wasn’t a pleasant conversation. I only asked if Harry liked boys and he started shouting at me. ‘He can like whoever he wants. You got a problem with that?’ Then he stood up like he was ready to fight me.”

Myrtle almost laughed, “Well, if he turns you down, just remind him that he can come see me any time he likes.”

Harry was his potions partner, his roommate since the eighth year rooming assignments were posted, even his friend.  But Draco wanted more.  He had always wanted more.  Draco had admitted that to himself almost at the beginning of the school year.  Harry never exactly turned him down, either.  That just made everything maddening.

He invited Harry to Hogsmeade the month before.  When Harry accepted, Draco was over the moon.  He came crashing back down to Earth when he grabbed Harry’s hand.  Harry had just stopped walking and looked at Draco.

“What?” Harry asked, pulling his hand out of Draco’s.

Draco panicked, “I, er, do you mind if we stop in to the quidditch supply shop? I need some polish.”

“Well, yeah.  I thought that was what we were here for,” Harry said.  

“I guess I thought we were multitasking,” Draco said.

A week later, in Potions, Harry was leaning over the cauldron to see if it smelled like burnt cinnamon yet as the assignment indicated.  His hair had gotten longer than Draco had ever seen it and he just couldn’t keep his hands to himself.  He reached over and ran his fingers through the thick, black tangle of hair, tucking it behind Harry’s ear.

“I wasn’t going to get my hair in the potion,” Harry said. “It’s not that long.”

Draco let out a deep sigh. “I know.”  He made himself look away from Harry only to make eye contact with Weasley who promptly made an I’m-watching-you gesture.

The following weekend, someone asked the house elves to bring cappuccinos and lattes up “as study aides, obviously” and Draco tried to care about the cappuccino in front of him, but he couldn’t stop watching Harry.  He almost choked on air as he watched Harry run his tongue along the rim of his mug, licking the chocolate from the edges of his cafe mocha.  

Draco couldn’t keep his eyes off Harry’s lips.  Draco reached up and brushed his thumb over Harry’s bottom lip.

Harry pulled away. “Do I have chocolate on me?” Harry asked, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

Completely crestfallen, Draco just shook his head. “You’re good.”  Before he went back to his Transfiguration essay, he caught eye contact with Weasley who was trying very hard not to laugh.

Earlier this week, Draco walked into their room to catch Harry dancing quite ridiculously to some muggle love song.  Harry blushed beautifully, and Draco grabbed his hands and danced with him.  By the end of the song, they were a bit closer than just hand-in-hand and both laughing.

“Why can’t all of my friends be so forgiving when I’m caught doing something silly?” Harry asked. “Hermione danced with me, but Ron never would.“ 

“I wouldn’t say ‘never,’” Weasley said from the doorway.

“Glad I could keep your dignity intact.  I only came in, for, er,” Draco looked around, “this,” he said, grabbing an ink bottle off his desk.  Weasley stared him down as he left the room.

Tonight, they sat in the common room celebrating the end of the first round of exams.  Draco couldn’t keep his eyes off Harry.  He laughed at Harry’s jokes, gave him a friendly shove when those jokes were at Draco’s expense.  Draco melted every time Harry’s leg bumped his own.  He intentionally moved a little closer when he thought it would make Harry’s shoulder brush his own. Then a conversation started taking over the group as a whole.

“I think a first kiss should always be discussed,” Pansy said. “It’s too presumptuous to assume an eye flutter and a smile would mean it’s okay to kiss.”

“It’s just because you’re a massive flirt,” Blaise said.

“Pots and kettles,” Hermione said. “I don’t know, I think it’s important to get consent, but implied consent between two people, depending on the people and the situation, could be okay.”

“I guess that tells you where I stand,” Weasley added. “How ‘bout you Harry? Negotiate kissing or surprise kissing?“ 

Harry shifted in his seat, "I don’t know.  It’s kind of hard to imagine anyone really wanting to kiss me.  Especially now, I mean, I don’t even know any other guys who prefer guys.”

Weasley stared at Draco before looking back at Harry, “Question still stands.  If one of us,” he said, waving a hand at the men in the group, “decided we fancied you.  Would you insist we asked permission?”

Draco’s head was going fuzzy.  Maybe he needed to remind himself to breathe.

“You trying to admit something there, Ron?” Harry laughed.

“Answer the question, dude,” Weasley said.  More than a couple people were looking at him like he’d sprouted a second face.

Harry threw his hands up in defeat, “What is the deal? Why are you getting so worked up over this? No. No. No I’m not opposed to surprise kisses! No, kiss consent isn’t something I insist on. No.  Okay. No-”

Before he realized he was moving, Draco had Harry’s face in his hands and his lips on Harry’s.  

“Thank fuck!” Weasley shouted.

Draco kissed Harry roughly, months of oblivious rejections be damned. When he felt Harry’s hands on him, he worried for the briefest moment that Harry would push him away.  It didn’t happen.  Harry’s arms circled his waist, pulling him closer as he kissed Draco back.  And, oh sweet Merlin, he moaned against Draco’s lips.  

Draco pulled away enough to ask, “How the bloody hell did you not know I like men?!”

Harry laughed, “Too much to hope for, I guess.”

Weasley, one of the few who hadn’t left while they were practically devouring each other, said, “He’s only been throwing himself at you for years, mate. And, Malfoy, I’d say it’s about bloody time you made a move but in your defense, you’ve been putting moves on him all year.”

Harry started to say something, but Draco cut him off with a kiss.

“Want to go discuss this, privately?” Draco asked.

Harry nodded. “Please.”


Attention: spoilers below!

Remember when, in season 3 episode 1b Moon the Undaunted, young princess Moon made a “Queen deal” with Eclipsa and violet spirals envolved on the arms of the two queens?

Okay, now, Eclipsa has the characteristic violet veins and, when Moon use the Darkest Spell to cut Toffee’s finger, she gets violet veins too.

Eclipsa revealed to Moon the Darkest Spell but the deal also says that when the immortal will be dead, Eclipsa will be free. Now, focus on the end of Toffee (s03ep04): Eclipsa is still frozen in the crystal (even if we can see that is gonna cracking) but more important the violet veins on the Eclipsa’s arm are disappeared, instead on Moon they go up to the elbow and further!

Now, my theory is that the “freedom” requested by Eclipsa weren’t getting out the crystal but erasing traces of Dark Magic from her body. I think Dark Magic is gone definitively from Eclipsa to Moon. But why Eclipsa should have done something like this? Beacuse when you use the Darkest Spell, even only one time, you gonna die, and more you use that spell, less is your life course.

Repost to let know to others!