this is how slow today is i actually want to post this

Closet Softie

Or, How Bucky Barnes Nearly Ruined His Tough-Guy Rep

(On AO3)


The trail mix was gone. 

The nice, expensive trail mix, with twelve kinds of nuts and the big sunflower seeds and dried fruits, the kind Tony only rarely left sitting on the common floors for everyone to get at, was gone. 

Clint had been looking forward to that stuff all morning

All the way through a hellish morning “jog” with Steve, all through Nat handing him his ass on the training mats, all through firing the same batch of misweighted arrows over and over so Tony could take scans and fix the design, he’d been thinking, when this is done I get to go upstairs and hang out on the couch and watch Dog Cops and eat the good trail mix, guilt-free. 

And it was gone.

Clint was gonna shoot somebody.

Just as soon as he figured out who’d taken the trail mix.


kingofmemes posted:

yesterday i saw a sad duck in the park who kept getting picked on by the other ducks so today i brought some trail mix and we had a nice lunch together. also i think he might be the duck who pooped on sam last week. if so, he is officially my new best friend. 

Posted at 3:29 PM, 24379 notes

(Read More Below)


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I’m Not A Kid: Part 3 (Final Part)

I’m Not a Kid: Part 3 (Final Part) (m)

Word count: 7.7k

Genre/Warnings: angst, smut, dirty talk

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Summary: You finally face Jungkook after he moved away, three years ago.

Parts: one | two (3/3)

It had been three years since you had laid eyes on Jeon Jungkook. Not that you had been keeping count. It was somewhere near almost three. You two were going hot and heavy in secret for two years. Jungkook went to college while working for his father part time. Luckily for you Mr. Jeon had his son working with you most of the time. The two of you actually worked very well together. Then the day came where Jungkook graduated and he came and worked for the company for about half a year but then his dad decided to open and wanted Jungkook to manage another branch in another country.

You were devastated to say the least when you had to hear about it from the whole office and not even your boyfriend, Jungkook. Of course you thought the rumors were just that, rumors. But then you had went into Jungkook’s office and he wasn’t there. All of his stuff had been taken out and you just stood there. You remember the feeling so vividly, it made you sick to your stomach. 

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English Is Hard, Okay?! Langst Prompt Fill

For the anon who wanted a story where Lance had a hard time speaking English and the paladins teasing him for it.


Lance walked into the kitchen one morning with dark circles under his eyes. He trudged over to get a bowl and began filling it with food goo.

“You look like shit, Lance” Keith teased, trying to egg Lance into one of their normal fights. The other paladins ignored the banter, used to the Red and Blue paladins fighting.

“Yeah, I know. I don’t feel like fighting today, Keith, sorry,” Lance said, trying to get his food goo and leave as quickly as possible.

Keith frowned. Lance wasn’t playing along.
Usually this kind of stuff cheered the Blue paladin right up!

“Wake up on the wrong side of the bed? I was just teasing, you just look a little tired,” Keith said, trying, again, to lighten the mood.

“No, you know what Keith? I didn’t wake up on the wrong side of the bed I woke up in the wrong fucking bed after a dream where I had to watch my family die!

And I can’t even know if they’re actually alive because I’m not even in the same fucking galaxy as them and I didn’t want to fight and I thought I made that clear when I literally told you I didn’t want to but obviously I was wrong.

Hopefully I made it clear this time so I can go eat in my room and nobody will bother me,” Lance said calmly. The lack of emotion in his voice was unnerving. He took his bowl, grabbed a spoon, and left the room.

The other paladins glanced at each other with wide eyes as they watched the usually energetic and fun paladin walk off to his room.

Keith ate the rest of his meal with his head down, and nobody dared to break the tense silence.

After breakfast everyone broke off to work on their own projects or do whatever they needed until group training.

A few hours later, everyone was waiting in the training room for Lance. He walked in about ten minutes late, dressed in workout clothes the castle provided. He stared silently at the ground as Allura began to lecture him on his tardiness.

Training began with a few warm up laps around the room.

Lance visibly pulled himself together and worked a smile onto his face.

He nudged Pidge as he passed her, and high fives Shiro as he passed him.

Lance always enjoyed this portion of training since he was undeniably the fastest paladin (without their lions anyway).

When they slowed to a stop after five laps, Allura directed everyone to different parts of the room to work on things each were bad at.

Lance was shown the middle of the room, to fight close range with the gladiator. Hunk gave Lance a sympathetic glance.

Lance fought the gladiator for almost two hours. The other paladins had been allowed a break when they managed to finish whatever task they were given, but Lance had been at a stalemate with the damn gladiator.

The blue paladin began to slow down due to exhaustion, and the gladiator got in one well placed hit before it shut down.

Lance plopped himself down on a bench with the rest of the paladins as Allura and Coran talked.

Shiro leaned forward to look at Lance, whose eyes were closed as he leaned against the wall.

“Hey, you did good, buddy,” Shiro said, knowing that Lance had worked harder than any of them had that day.

Lance opened his eyes at the praise. He was sure he was going to get scolded for losing, and a smile worked it’s way onto his face.

“Thanks, Shiro. You did really well too. Hunk, you were really awesome with that thing you were running on.”

Pidge barked out a short burst of laughter.

“What was Hunk running on, again, Lance?” Pidge asked, barely concealed laughter coloring her voice.

“Um the thing where the ground moves so you can run in place?” Lance explained, frowning.

“Oh my god, Lance doesn’t know what a treadmill is!” Pidge shouted, cackling.

Her laughter prompted everyone but Lance to laugh along with her. Everyone had needed a laugh after a tense morning and a hard workout.

The laughter died down and Hunk looked over to see that Lance had tears in his eyes and his muscles were tensed.

“Hey, Lance, buddy, you alright?” Hunk asked, drawing the team’s attention.

Lance shook his head.

“I know it’s stupid and you guys think I’m stupid but it’s really fucking hard sometimes. I never learned the damn word.

Just like I don’t know what half the stuff Hunk and Pidge are talking about because I learned science and engineering and math in Cuba. In SPANISH.

I have to translate everything I’m thinking into a different fucking language because I grew up with no English at all!

And when I got to the Garrison I had to deal with people’s bullshit on my accent and how I couldn’t speak English correctly and I thought you guys didn’t care about stuff like that but maybe I just hadn’t messed up yet!

I’m sorry I suck at English and I forgot what a fucking treadmill is, but I promise you, I didn’t forget because I’m stupid. I remembered what to say in Spanish.

I’m sorry if my explanation wasn’t good enough, but I’m pretty sure you guys wouldn’t have understood it if I told you Hunk was running on a cinta de correr!!!” Lance yelled, taking a few deep breaths as he finished ranting.

Lance stood there, fuming for a few moments, tears openly streaming down his face. Everyone stared in shock, unsure what to make of Lance’s outburst.

The blue paladin waited for someone to say something, and when no-one did he bolted from the room, eyes wide and terrified.

Hunk ran after him after a moment. He knew exactly where his best friend would be.


Thanks for this prompt! Hope you like it! I’m thinking of posting a part two?

Taste The Sweet (Grayson Smut)

Summary: You’re a Youtuber, hanging around the H&M tent at Coachella. Grayson is your biggest fan.
Word Count: 2,861
Warnings: Fingering.
A/N: Thank you to the anon who sent this idea in! This is all your idea, I’m just writing it out. I didn’t want to post the request because it contains “spoilers” but this imagine is basically what the anon requested. Hope you like this one! (title from Don’t Be So Shy by Imany)


“Turn your head a little to the side…” The photographer gestured with her hand, cocking her head to the left so you smiled and complied. “Perfect. Now smile.”

The flash went off a few times as she snapped her photos, and you tried to stay still and let her do the work but you were feeling too excited. Earlier today you had arrived in Palm Springs, ready to head over to the festival and show off your outfit that you had spent three weeks planning beforehand.

You didn’t know how you had gotten so lucky. One minute you had been uploading your pictures on instagram and it had blown up, gaining over a hundred thousand followers the first few months. By the time you had reached five hundred thousand, you had started up a Youtube channel, and a year later you had gained over two million on your channel and been invited to numerous events. Coachella being one of them.

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nude wars — preview

pt1 | pt2 preview

pairings: yoongi x reader x jungkook

genre: smut, touches of fluff / frat!yoonkook

description: Okay sure, maybe having a threesome with two best friends from the same frat wasn’t the smartest thing you’d ever done. But hey, when the result was them vying for your attention in the form of scandalous snaps, breathy audio messages, and unspeakable texts, well then the decision definitely wasn’t that bad.

— Or alternatively, your phone getting caught in the middle of Yoongi and Jungkook constantly trying to one-up each other in a war of sexting (and just maybe romantics).

note: so I know pt2 was supposed to come out today, but I’ve been sick for the past week and a half and I actually ended up having to go to the hospital yesterday bc I guess I wasn’t taking it seriously enough. but yeah, I thought I could at least post a tiny snippet ;;


It took all of five minutes into your shift for the post-sexting depression to kick in. The only word you could use to describe today’s atmosphere at work being completely dead. There were barely any customers to keep you occupied, leaving you to watch the time tick by as your only form of entertainment, second by unbearably miserable second burying you deeper into a realm of inescapable boredom.

And this continued on… For five miserable hours, until you finally managed to gain some relief. Your good friend and co-worker, Jimin, finally coming in to start his shift.

“Someone looks like they had a long night. Let me guess, another late night on greek row?” He snickered, making his way behind the counter to join you.

“Haha, very funny, but… Yeah,” You ended up admitting, causing chuckles to fall from both of you.

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Just got back from Voter Protection Training!

It went really well! We do it in odd election years before the primaries because there are historically a lot of shenanigans regarding people crossfiling to get in primaries for parties not their own and we tend to have election observers for the different candidates in place, but there was a lot of general purpose information I want to generally make sure everyone knows.

Polling Place Dos and Don’ts: Campaigning

  • Candidate Behavior in Polling Places: Candidates can enter, vote and leave. They cannot hang around inside to say “hi” to voters, even if it’s stuff that’s not technically partisan like “I just want to thank you for voting today!” Vote and get out.
  • Not a candidate? You still literally shouldn’t even speak a candidate’s name while inside the polling place. This extends to the poll workers - if you forget a candidate’s name and ask the poll worker what it is, they actually should not even tell you that much. If you ever see a poll worker suggesting a specific candidate or seeming to promote a candidate, it is a violation and should be reported.
  • Along similar lines: do not wear candidate paraphernalia inside. No buttons, no shirts, no hats, no weird fun themed socks. This is a bit of a gray area but generally speaking, err on the side of caution and don’t.
  • Pamphlets should be handed out outside the polls, not inside. Rules vary by state, but generally you can’t hand out literature for a candidate inside the polls or within a certain perimeter of the entrance. I’ve seen some argument back and forth as to what counts as the “entrance” if you have two sets of doors, with an outer one to the building and an inner one, but I’ve absolutely reported people for being inside the polling building and seen them dutifully standing outside afterwards, so generally assume they should not be in the building.
  • NO ONE CAN BLOCK VOTERS FROM ENTERING OR INTIMIDATE VOTERS, INCLUDING GETTING IN THEIR PATH OR DEMANDING IDENTIFICATION OUTSIDE THE POLLS.
  • I want to really emphasize that last point - if you are in a voter ID state, your ID will be checked INSIDE. If you are asked for your ID outside the poll, that is a violation and those people do not have legitimate authority.
  • If someone is intimidating or harassing voters, including demanding to see ID,  report them. Additionally AS LONG AS YOU ARE OUTSIDE THE POLLING PLACE - get them on video on your phone if possible. Post the video to social media, but also post it to your local news station’s Facebook page. That having been said, be veeeery cautious about doing this inside a polling place - there are definitely rules in some states about recording inside a polling place. I’m afraid I can’t give general advice for this situation.
  • If you are unable to get into your polling place due to accessibility issues, that is also a violation. Report it, same as above.

Reporting Violations: See Something? Say Something!

  • Spot violations? Report them ASAP so they can be stopped before the day is out. They might get one or two voters, unfortunately, but don’t let them scare people away all day! They can be blatant about this type of thing, too - we had a story in tonight’s training about a district where, for years, Latinx voters were turned away at the door and told that “Latinos don’t vote here.” It was finally uncovered three years later when a phone banker calling for a local candidate spoke with a Latina woman who asked “Will I be able to vote this year?” and “I haven’t been able to vote these past few years, do Latinos vote somewhere else?” This was uncovered in 2012. Keep a sharp eye out. 
  • Generally speaking, each polling place should have a Judge of Elections - if anything is wrong, go to them first. Ask a poll worker until you get to speak to them.
  • Is the Judge of Elections complicit or not cooperating? Then go over to their head to the County Board of Elections. This information, obviously, varies by County, but I suggest googling it for your County and putting it into your phone’s address book.
  • 866-OUR-VOTE also does voter protection services, but their reactions may be slower, so go to them only after the above steps.
  • Phone issues/phone anxiety/etc.? There may also be places to report online! As I was informed, state sites are often more reliable for that then county, but please try to file a report on both. 
  • But the most important thing of all? Report A.S.A.P. The day after the election might stop them from pulling a repeat act next year, but who knows how many voters they’ll be able to stop before then? Don’t let these clowns operate all day! 
  • Finally, just as a note if you do see someone actively intimidating voters: record and report, but do not engage. However, you can offer to escort voters inside if they’re being intimidated! 
  • If you see someone being intimidated, encourage them to come forward - if you’re being intimidated, PLEASE come forward. Reporting when it happens the only way to nip this kind of thing in the bud. Without people coming forward and reporting, we get Latinx people being turned away from a polling place for three entire years before someone actually alerts the authorities because apparently no one posted a competent election watcher in that entire frigging time.
  • (I’m still so mad about that story - just oh my god.)

Trouble With Voting? Name Not on the Roll? No Voter ID?

  • Again, can’t emphasize this enough: If you have any trouble voting, flag down the judge of elections if you need help, then call your county board of elections if that fails or the judge is complicit in the problem.
  • Is your name not on the rolls? If all they’ve done is flip the book open to your alphabetical spot, they have not done their due diligence. Voter registration can be slow: sometimes, voter registrations will be sent in as “supplementals” to the book, depending on when they arrive. Have them check back of book for the supplementals first.
  • Still can’t find your name? Are you reasonably sure you’re in the right place and have registered? Better yet, is the online voter registration checker telling you you’re registered? Have the Judge of Elections call the county board of elections to see if you’ve been registered but not yet entered in the book yet!
  • Also, live in a Voter ID state? Check to make sure of the requirements! Some states only require voter ID if it’s your first time voting in that polling place. The exact form of acceptable ID may vary but your driver’s license should always be enough. If they’re telling you it isn’t, they are lying. Report it.
  • And if all else fails? ENTER A PROVISIONAL BALLOT. If you can prove after the fact that you’re eligible to vote at that polling place -  say, if you forgot your voter ID - you can still have your vote counted! 
  • You may never be denied a provisional ballot, ever. If someone tells you they’ve run out of provisional ballots they are ALMOST CERTAINLY LYING - they have a truly absurd amount of those on hand and can call for more. If someone tells you this, call the board of elections and tell them “Hey, [x voting place] is out of provisional ballots.” That’ll be resolved real quick then.
  • In fact, was there a mixup about your polling place? Whenever possible, you should always get to your actual voting place, but if you can’t make it in time to vote there, try filing a provisional ballot at the polling place where you currently are! It may be counted for your proper polling place later! Basically only do this if you physically cannot get to your polling place before the polls close, though. 
  • If you or someone else needs translation services, they are legally entitled to them; however, the translator does need to be certified, generally; you can’t just bring a friend or family member in to translate in the booth.

Poll Watcher and Worker Responsibilities

  • Poll watchers are usually registered for a certain candidate. I’m not sure if this is true for all states but in at least some there is a limit to number of poll watchers per candidate. Sometimes they’ll let a generic political party have a poll watcher (E.G., ‘Poll watcher for the Democratic Party’, etc.), but it’s rare and may be thrown out, so don’t count on it if you have another option.
  • Poll watchers need to be registered and approved. You can’t just show up and ‘poll watch’. If someone is claiming to be a poll watcher without official papers, report them. If someone is trying to ‘poll watch’ inside the polls without official papers, definitely report them.
  • What can poll watchers do? Well, for starters, they can check before polls open that numbers are at zero! After that, their job is to sit at table and watch. 
  • Do NOT tell any voters what candidate you are pollwatching for. That is a violation. See that thing about “literally do not speak a candidate’s name inside of a polling place” above.
  • Poll watchers can also watch the votes being counted and can even watch as the write-ins and absentee ballots are counted.
  • Aside from the Judge of Elections, poll workers, and poll watchers, polling places may also have an inspector for each party. Poll staff can be elected or appointed, depending on the position - if your polling place doesn’t have anyone from your party, you can tell the judge of elections you’re interested in volunteering. HOWEVER, you’re there from before it opens to after the last vote is counted, so make sure you’re up for that because that is a loooong day.
  • Finally, just as a general note: Exit pollers can ask you how you voted, but you can refuse to answer - no one can force you to answer how you voted.

And that’s my absurdly long voter protection spiel! There’s a lot of other voting rights stuff to know in terms of registration, felon registration rights (varies by state!), homeless registration rights (I know in at least some states you can register even if you’re homeless and just need to circle the area you’re usually in on a map in order to register, but that may not be universal), but we just covered stuff at the polls themselves here.

Now, get out there and vote! Every year has at least a primary and a general election, plus sometimes special elections - please don’t just turn out for Presidential elections!

Imagine: making Tom relax on his birthday

To say Tom was a bit on edge would have been an understatement. With the recent GQ article talking about his previous girlfriend, and more rumors about how long the two of you would last or when you’d break up, he desperately needed a ‘lazy day’. So, you took it into your own hands, and made sure Thomas had nothing planned on his birthday until the night, when he could celebrate with family and friends.

The two of you had been long time friends, and after Thomas recovered from Taylor, you surprised each other by realizing you had buried shared emotions. You avoided the media as a couple, but the important people in your lives knew, and thanks to them, Tom Hiddleston got to have a relaxing birthday.

Said actor was currently in bed, boxers only, well past his normal waking time. His eyes eased open to the soft golden glow coming through the windows, and when he saw your heavenly smile at his side, he knew being 36 was going to be enjoyable.

“Good morning, love… What time is it?” He asked groggily, as he shifted to wrap his arms around your loosely clothed torso. You had taken to wearing Marvel pajamas as a joke with him, and currently, you just had undergarments and his Thor shirt, which was certainly oversized for you.

“9:26am.” You responded, after glancing at the clock. You heard Tom take in a sharp breath as his eyes widened, but you wrapped your arms around his neck and held him close, interrupting his worried thoughts. “Thomas, today is your birthday. You have earned a break, so don’t worry… That’s my job.” You joked lightly, running your fingers through his soft hair, letting your nails massage his scalp. He hummed contentedly at the feeling, letting his eyes close.

“Wh-What about-” he began, but soon felt your soft lips against his, prompting him to react in kind. His hands drifted to your waist and hair, but before he could lose himself in your embrace, you pulled back and smiled sweetly.

“Tom, it’s fine. Everything will be okay.” You reassured, before shifting so you straddled his waist and looked down at him, planting your hands to the sides of his head. “You deserve the world, but today, rest should do the trick. I’ll make some tea, pop in a movie or find a nice record, and we can while the day away doing whatever you want… except working.” You explained, your voice low and silky. Tom stared up at you with wonder in his eyes, as he let out a string of soft chuckles and reached his hands up to brush back your curtain of hair.

“What did I do to deserve you?” He asked, his voice wistful and loving. You chuckled lightly and leaned down, pressing your soft mouth to his in slow kisses. After a few seconds, you parted, but remained a breath away.

“You didn’t have to do anything… Now, any ideas for the day, birthday boy?” You asked with a growing grin. Thomas knew you were determined to give him a relaxing day, so he happily accepted that gift. However, he did have some plans of his own for you.

“Oh, darling… this is going to be the busiest day off we’ve ever had.”

FIC RECS

in honor of gaining another hundred followers on my twitter account @getsterREKT heres another rec list. 

This will just be made up of lots and lots of different types of fics. Make sure to read the warnings for each fic before reading. 

(fics with ** are favorites)


It Takes A Village by  Hypocorismm

Stiles’s used to yogurt handprints on his shirts from where he picked her up, and he’s used to snot on his shoulders and neck from where she cried after a bad dream. He’s used to her legendary tantrums when she doesn’t get her way, her eyes glowing ferocious gold. He’s used to being the village it takes to raise her, and the pack she longs for.

Except, he needs the pack’s help, and Derek’s protection when a particularly power-hungry pack wants his cub. And he isn’t used to sharing.

WORDS: 49227

RATING: Mature

CHAPTERS: 35/35

WARNINGS: angst, kidnapping, mpreg.


Night Stroll by  Marishna

“Is it night there?”

Derek chuckled. “Yeah, it is. How do you know where I am?”

“I don’t, that’s why it’s weird it’s night. That puts you in… Europe?” Stiles asked after some quick math.

Derek raised an eyebrow. “Spain. You haven’t lost that…” Derek waved his hand. “Stileness.”

WORDS: 3276

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTER: 1/1

WARNINGS: derek has insomnia??? is that a warning??? idk


****Prince Among Wolves by  tylerfucklin (Deshonanana)

Looking for full day/evening sitter. 2 twin boys age 4. Must have exp. w/werewolves. Must be human. No pedophiles. No teenage girls. Pay negotiable. 

WORDS: 101,000

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS: 20/20

WARNINGS: mild transphobia, derek learns acceptance, broken family, so much angst


Walking Into Darkness by  alenie

Derek hears Stiles before he sees him. There’s anxious, wheezy breathing coming from the next aisle over in the grocery store, accompanied by a racing heart and the smell of unwashed sneakers and hair gel. He turns the corner and Stiles is standing frozen in the dairy aisle, knuckles clenched around the metal of his shopping basket.

WORDS: 6342

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: panic attacks, anxiety, depression, post 3b, pre-sterek relationship 


****Ashes, Ashes by  ShanaStoryteller

The Sheriff gets a call at work - someone’s tried to burn down his home with his son inside.

“I thought of you coming here, and finding me dead, of another burnt out husk of a body, something else fire has stolen from you, of you having nothing left to grasp but ashes,” John can’t even call that a whimper, it’s clearly a whine as Derek’s hands tighten against Stile’s hips, as if his boy will shudder to dust at the mere mention of the possibility unless Derek’s hands can hold him into one piece, “and that thought was worse than dying.”

WORDS: 2699

RATING: Teen And Up

CHAPTERS:1/1

WARNINGS: so much angst, stiles nearly burns to death


Just Realize What I Just Realized by  literaryoblivion

He’s never noticed it before; it’s always just been second nature to him these days, does it out of habit, but it’s not until he stops to actually think about it that it becomes abundantly and embarrassingly clear to him that he is in love with Stiles and that they are practically dating without the actual dating part…

WORDS: 2529

RATING: Teen And Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: a lil angst, (but mostly fluff)


The Potential Fatality of Assuming by  crossroadswrite

The hair, the buttons and the general happy and slightly tired disposition with which Derek came back from his secret exploits were as obvious as a glaring neon sign flashing the words JUST GOT LAID.

A sign that Stiles ignored because he had a seven year plan god damn it.

(OR: in which Stiles assumes things, gets accosted by the sister he never/always wanted, discovers he was horribly wrong, almost dies via Derek Hale with kids, can’t handle all that collarbone action, uses tickling as the ultimate mode of revenge, and gets a boyfriend. In that order.)

WORDS: 2196

RATING: General

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: misunderstandings, because stiles is dumb, lots of pining


****If I Could Trade Mistakes For Sheep, Count Me Away Before You Sleep by  alisaj

“Thing is, Stiles,” Derek says, his voice hard and unfaltering. “I didn’t sign up for you. You just hung around until we got used to you being here.”

That stings. He hadn’t realised how Derek feels about him. They’ve been getting on quite well, teaming up on little missions and bantering back and forth without malice. Stiles sometimes lets Derek crash in his room after a big fight, trying not to let on how intriguing he finds the werewolf.

“Well now we can get used to you not being here. You’re a liability, Stilinski. You can’t protect yourself and we always end up having to help you when we’ve got more important things to do. You’re out of the pack.”

or

The one where Derek is a terrible Alpha and Stiles ends up walking into a big pile of shit.

WORDS: 33,383

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: stiles gets kicked out of the pack, derek is stupid, like, so stupid, stiles gets hurt, theres so much angst in this like wtf, stiles is sad, the pack sucks


Sour Kush (series) by alisvolatpropiis

Stiles mentally curses Erica, because in all of her warnings about how brusque this guy could be, she forgot mention that he’s also hotter than the fucking sun. If Stiles had any lingering questions about his sexuality, they’d be completely settled by what this guy is doing to him. In fact, he might not even be gay anymore. He might be in the midst of crossing into some yet-to-be-named sexuality that’s all about a scruffy black beard and alarming green eyes and muscles and tattoos and this guy’s everything ever.

The guy’s name is Derek, his lust-addled brain supplies distantly.

Well that settles it, then. Stiles is Dereksexual.

WORKS: 3

COMPLETE: it says no but they havent updated in like over 2 years so im guessing its done

WORDS: 15,392

RATING: Explict 

WARNINGS: everyone is stoned all the time, also in work 2 stiles is hurt because he thinks derek is getting it on with parrish, they’re dumb, age difference, derek has a beardddd 


I Just Want You For My Own (More Than You Could Ever Know) by  yodasyoyo

“What is with that sweater, dude?”

Derek ducks his head to look at it, abashed. “Uh- Mrs Hernandez knitted it for me. It’s an early Christmas gift.” He smooths it down self-consciously.

Stiles cocks an eyebrow.

“What? She’s my neighbor and sometimes I-” Derek trails off. Stiles’ other eyebrow rises to join the first, and Derek sighs. “Sometimes I help her carry her shopping.”

Of course he does. One day maybe Stiles will stop being in love with Derek Hale, but today is not that day.

WORDS: 16,065

RATING: Teen And Up

CHAPTERS: 4/4

WARNINGS: pining, fake relationships, they’re both idiots. 


Baby You’re Beautiful by  supernaynay

“God you’re beautiful.”

Derek hadn’t even realized that the words had left his mouth until the whole room went silent, including Stiles, who until about five seconds earlier was busy yelling at him for putting himself in danger yet again.

WORDS: 1089

RATING: General

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: derek is hit with a truth spell


****(Sacred) In The Ordinary by  idyll

The Pack, after college, graduate school and the starting of careers, comes back to Beacon Hills. Nothing’s gotten less complicated after all this time.

Based on a kink meme prompt that grew legs and got serious.

Note: This is a whole lot of pack!fic with a very slow build Derek/Stiles.

WORDS: 78,759

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS: 9/9

WARNINGS: violence, slow build


Cause I Built a Home (For You, For Me) by  noneedforhystereks

Mechanic!Derek and Daddy!Stiles

Derek Hale is a mechanic in the sleepy town of Beacon Hills, where he has lived all of his life. He spends his day in a simple routine: wake up, fix cars, go home, sleep. It’s what he’s good at, and it keeps things simple and uncomplicated. Derek doesn’t let people in and remains emotionally distant from everyone except his sister, Laura, and her daughter. This all changes when Boyd tows in an old blue Jeep that needs a lot of work and Derek meets the owner of said Jeep.

Because once Derek meets Stiles and his kids, he can’t stop himself from caring. And he doesn’t want to stop.

WORDS: 59,719

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS: 15/15

WARNINGS: angst, pining, emotional hurt, stiles has a lot of baggage. 


Waiting For Our Superman by  tearsandholdme

Derek knew the moment he opened the front door of his clean and pristine apartment to Stiles Stilinski holding a small boy, a cluster of bags, and a suitcase, he was screwed. In every way possible. Undone by the big brown eyes of a small child and his annoying, witty, and attractive father.

WORDS: 95,240

RATING: Mature

CHAPTERS: 22/22

WARNINGS: angst, mpreg, emotional hurt, overprotective derek


Adding You to My Future by  NekoIzumi

“So, I’m Stiles.” he smiled warmly once he had put his unannounced patient down on the exam table. “I will poke and prod you a little bit to check for internal injuries, those that I can’t see because they’re inside you, and some of it might hurt but it will pass, I promise. I will tell you everything I’m about to do and why I’m doing it so just stay calm and this will go like a breeze, okay?”

Now, Stiles wasn’t stupid in any way, shape or form, he knew a were when he saw one… although he had obviously never seen a werecat before, and definitely not one as young as this one.

WORDS: 42,252

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS:9/9

WARNINGS: violence, like, lots of violence, slow build, gore, emotional comfort, bamf stiles


Stars Plummet: a Christmas Story by  Peckishdragon

When Stiles left Beacon Hills, he never thought he would be coming back. Eight years later, he is coming home for Christmas, with a small passenger in tow. Old feelings, never forgotten, are rekindled.

WORDS: 11,589

RATING: Mature

CHAPTERS: 6/6

WARNINGS: a lil violence, like a tiny bit, 


All They Have by  Nival_Vixen

Single dads AU where Derek and Stiles meet because Derek’s daughter and Stiles’ trans son become friends at school.

WORDS: 4004

RATING: Teen And Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: trans child, which leads to ignorant adults being ugly fucks, protective derek 


love comes in all shapes and sizes by  trilliastra

“Daddy says that when I’m in trouble I should get the police because they always help us. You’re going to help me, right?” Stiles smiles at her, happy that today he decided to stop by the grocery store to buy milk after his shift instead of going straight home. At least now he’s able to help the little girl, who knows what would have happened to her if he weren’t around.

“Of course I will.” He smiles again. “What’s your name?”

“Rebecca Hale.” She answers proudly. “My daddy is Derek Hale.”

WORDS: 2207

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: kate argent


When You Wish Upon a Dragon by  lupinus

Stiles is at the Hale house, lounging on the front stoop watching Isaac, Erica, and Boyd wrestle, when the baby comes running out of the woods.
Derek becomes instant father to a magically appearing baby and falls in love. Stiles can’t take the cute and worries Derek’s heart will break if he loses the kid. 

or, a dragon gives derek a baby, stiles is oblivious, steve just loves his bright pink rocking unicorn and his da and ma 

WORDS: 13,739

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: none, but so much fluff


****Lucky That I’m Yours Every Day by  stilinskisparkles

Derek doesn’t see how Valentine’s Day can get any better than a normal day with Stiles.

WORDS: 6772

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: fluff. just. all the fluff. its disgusting how fluffy it is really.


Relationship Status: It’s Complicated by  kellifer_fic

Okay, I know this is a huge stretch for you, but can you please pretend you’re like, into me?

WORDS: 4010

RATING: Mature

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNING: mentioned stiles/omc 


***************Shot Through The Heart by  LunaCanisLupus_22

All they’ve given him is the guy’s head shot. And it’s terrible because now he is ridding the world of one more ridiculously attractive, instant pants dropping- take me now, if you please- regulation hottie.

Even if he has a scowl to rival Kirsten Stewart.

Or the one when Stiles and Derek work for rival assassin companies and are sent to kill each other. It definitely doesn’t go as planned.

WORDS: 64,833

RATING: Explicit

CHAPTERS: 12/12

WARNINGS: so much violence, they literally try to kill eachother, enemies to lovers pretty much


will to follow through by  owlpostagain

“It depends entirely on how you look at it, I guess,” Stiles shrugs. “On the one hand, instant healing and the apparently inherited ability to pull off leather at all times. On the other, serious attitude problems and a suspicious disappearance of eyebrows.”

“Even Derek’s?” Danny snorts, “that’s a lot of eyebrow to lose.”

“I know,” Stiles agrees. “You should see, it’s so weird. Every time I want to ask him where they go, except he’d totally eat my face off.”

“There are worse ways to die.”

WORDS: 42,411

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 2/2

WARNINGS: angst, mentions of violence, 


Professor D. Hale (series) by  har1ey_quinn


A series of outsider POVs on Professor Hale and his significant other (with some guest appearances from the pack)

WORKS: 7

COMPLETE: possibly

WORDS: 18,008

RATING: Teen and Up

WARNINGS: none


go on without me!!!! (or the one where stiles is cursed by witches and overreacts to everything) by  day

Stiles is cursed by witches and he can’t react like a normal human being.
Scott is a terrible best friend and can’t stop laughing.
Derek just wants it all to be over.

WORDS: 1396

RATING: General

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: crack


******For My Next Trick, I’ll Regret All of My Life Choices: a performance by Derek Hale and 80% of his eyebrows by  crossroadswrite

(978): I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
.
“What’s wrong with my eyebrows?”

Kira gives him a sympathetic look, and climbs up to sit next to him, “You kind of… don’t have one.”

“I what!” he shouts, wincing at the volume of his own voice.

Kira pats him on the shoulder and shoves a piece of toast in his hand.

“It’s not that bad,” she tries to console him with a smile, then glances up at his left eyebrow and winces, “It could definitely be worse. It’s not all gone. Just. Half of it.”

Derek considers crying into his orange juice but decides that would be a waste and because his mother taught him how to be a good guest he opts to drink it instead.

WORDS: 2566

RATING: Teen and Up

CHAPTERS: 1/1

WARNINGS: none buT THIS FIC IS AN ALL TIME FAV, THE FUCKING SQUIRRELS VIKING BURIAL GETs ME EVERYTIME, AND BATMAN OH MY

strawberry + banana ▹ jk | M

❝hello! i’m a new writer and this will be my first scenario on tumblr. it’ll be an altered request (that you can find the original for here) but i hope you like it all the same ;; i’ll be posting more soon though so please send in requests! ◉◡◉❞


jungkook | smut | enemies to lovers au | one thousand words | request


“I was being fucking sarcastic.”

“I know, mosquito. It’s one of your many charms and why I’m the only person who can stand to be around you.

"You can’t stand me, though.”

“I was being sarcastic.”

warnings: smut | graphic language | jk being annoying

gif credit: here.

“Hey there, mosquito tits.”

“Hey yourself, bubble butt.”

This was a common exchange between the two of you—from mortal enemies to best friends. It started when you were paired together for a science project. Not the best idea on your teacher’s part because his favorite class was lunch.

Lunch wasn’t even a class.

Keep reading

Mad Science

Finally, it was done. 8 years of research, months of preparation, and a menagerie of deceased mice, but at last he held in his hand the formula that he had sought for most of his adult life. Dr. Walker felt an incredible excitement building within him as he inspected the tiny vial. He was so close to realizing his dream that he could almost taste it, taking all his willpower to stop himself from downing the vial’s contents right then and there. No, mad scientist he may be, however he was not so mad as to administer a still as of yet unproven cocktail to himself without any kind of human testing.

Unfortunately for him, this formula was being done off the books, without any knowledge of the university, so he couldn’t just announce his findings to the world and start human trials. Jon also knew he couldn’t simply spike someone’s drink with the formula to observe the results. If it proved toxic he’d have to hide a body, a subject he had skipped in his mad scientist studies and had no idea how to handle. If it proved effective, the unwitting dupe would likely be largely upset at the outcome, and he wasn’t so sure he would be able to remove all evidence that would lead back to him anyway. He would have to find a guinea pig that was as enthused about his results as he was, but also willing to sacrifice some safety to achieve his goal.

Fortunately, the internet was a vast place, and home to many, many diverse interests.


Mikey was sauntering home after morning classes. The fall leaves were just beginning to turn red and brown, and he was already feeling slightly overwhelmed as assignments piled up at the beginning of his sophomore year. Things like cooking and eating healthy had long since gone out the window, as the freshly punched notches on his belt could attest. However, Mikey wasn’t exactly distressed at these developments, and he made his way back to his dorm already salivating at the thought of a frozen pizza lunch. Maybe even two pizzas, he thought, giving his small belly a pat.

Finally reaching his dorm, he kicked off his shoes, gave a courteous hello to his dorm-mates, dropped off his pack in his room, then made his way to the shared kitchen to pop the tops on two frozen pizzas. Safely set to bake for 20 minutes, he made his way back to his room to sit down, check his email, and surf the usual sites. Homework could wait until after lunch.

He’d always loved food. He’d always loved eating, but more than that, Mikey wanted to grow, to become huge, the biggest he could ever be. Growing up in a very health-conscious household had meant there’d never really been the opportunity to truly pig out. Now that Mikey had left the nest, he was going to make the most of his new-found freedom and eat whenever and whatever he wanted, and finally realize his dream of becoming bigger. He’d already gained the freshman 15 and then some, and was well on his way to packing away the sophomore thirty. A few more weeks and he’d have to buy bigger pants.

Still, progress was too slow for his liking; he wanted to get big, now. Luckily the internet was a big place, filled with many diverse interest. After checking his email, Mikey logged into Gnosher to check his messages there. Mikey had stumbled across the gainer community some years ago, and was surprised to find out there were a lot of people that actually shared his desires. Gnosher was just one such site where people could congregate, share tips, and just generally encourage one another to grow as big as they wanted. Mikey was in touch with several inspiring individuals, and he scrolled through a few messages congratulating him on nearly outgrowing his belt.

The message that caught his eye today was something he’d never received before. There was the usual congratulations for his steady gains, but after that was the question, “How would you like to get much much bigger, much much faster?” It sounded like he was going to be given a pitch for some sort of new weight gain protein mix, something that Mikey had so far avoided on a university budget, but he was intrigued enough to at least reply back asking for the details. Already putting it out of his mind and finishing up his online perusal, he made his way back to the kitchen to begin scarfing his now cooked pizzas.

Upon re-entering his room, Mikey was surprised to see on his still open Gnosher page that he’d already gotten a reply. Curiosity won out over hunger, and he clicked the message open to read it. It turned out the writer was a local, working at the university, and he’d been working on a weight gain formula that was now ready for human testing. After reading Mikey’s profile, he thought he’d be eager to take part in trials, and was wondering if he’d like to sign up. It all seemed too good to be true, and Mikey felt a healthy dose of skepticism, but once again curiosity won out and Mikey replied with positive enthusiasm. Again, a few short minutes later, he was provided instructions to come to professor Jon Walker’s lab this afternoon and he’d be given further instructions.

Bewildered, but excited, Mikey quickly ate his pizzas, stowed his homework for later this evening, and made his way to the Biotechnology building where professor Walker’s lab was.


Now he wondered if he truly was mad. Test the formula here? Now? And with a student here at the university? What if something went wrong? What if the boy screamed and went to the authorities? Or worse, what if it killed him? How would he drag a body out of this office, in the middle of the afternoon? The more the professor fraught and fretted the more insane he thought his plan to be. How could he let his own ego get the better of him to do something so reckless?

Professor Walker sighed, and slumped back behind his desk, the image of a young sophomore still displayed on his screen. Brown hair, blue eyes, boyish looks, and a budding belly; who was he kidding? It wasn’t just his ego that made him message this boy. A life devoted to science had left the professor desperately lonely, and he had jumped at the chance of not only fulfilling his life’s work, but also actually meeting someone with the same desires as his own. He sighed again at his own folly, but at the same time there was the building fire of anticipation. What if it all worked?

“Professor Walker?”

The voice was quiet, coming from the other end of the lab adjoining his office. Steeling himself, he put on his best professor face, and walked out the door to greet his subject.


“Professor?” Mikey called out, wondering if the professor may still be on lunch, but after a few moments he heard a bustling from the small office next to the lab, and then a small, bespectacled, middle-aged man walked out to greet him.

“Ah, Michael, so good you could make it,” he said warmly, extending his hand in greeting.

Mikey took the hand and shook. “Thank you for contacting me. I was surprised that this was something the university even studied.”

“Indeed, the biotechnology laboratory has many concurrent studies being done.”

“I’m in computer sciences, so I had no idea. I’d have certainly signed up if this was a posted study! So, do I have to sign anything?”

The professor paused and them seemed to stammer nervously. “Ah, yes, well, this is something of a personal passion of mine. Off the school’s records, so to speak.”

Mikey raised a skeptical eyebrow. “So… what is it? Some sort of new protein powder?”

“No no no, nothing of the sort. What I have created is a chemical formula able to completely alter the subjects fundamental genetics in such a way that it’s almost like they’re a new person.”

“That sounds… a little dangerous? Look, I’d like to fill out, not become a totally different person.” Mikey said, taking a caution half-step back.

“Oh dear, I’m terribly sorry, I misspoke. The formula doesn’t change everything, like your hair or eye colour, but actually targets and edits some very specific genes. You’ve heard of course of certain ethnicities being more prone to weight gain and obesity?”

“You mean like, Samoans?” Mikey offered, still skeptical.

“Yes, precisely, very good! Polynesian men simply have higher percentage of adipose tissue than the general population. What my formula does is take those specific genome sequences and edits them into the host, essentially changing their heritage slightly, but without changing anything else like skin or hair colour.” Mikey was about to reply, but the professor exuberantly continued, “But that’s just one example of what the formula does; obesity is a much more complex syndrome than any one gene. There is also the hereditary genetics passed from parents and especially the mother, there is epigenetics when a child is overweight and carries that weight into puberty and then adulthood - all these things are contained and subtly changed in this formula. It’s truly a marvel, if I do say so myself!” Concluded the professor, clearly proud of himself.

“But you haven’t tested it on people yet.” Mikey added flatly.

The professor seemed to shrink bank in on himself. “Well, no, not as of yet, that’s why you’re here of course. However, studies on laboratory animals have been very promising.”

“Like, how promising?”

“98% of subjects have doubled their initial mass after ingestion.”

“And the other 2%?”

“Um, well most of the rest were simply ineffective, and a statistically insignificant percentage suffered mild cardiac events.”

Mikey’s eyes narrowed. “How insignificant?”

“It was one. Out of hundreds of subjects,” the professor grumped. “I have a defibrillator in my office. I promise you this will be perfectly safe.”

Mikey crossed his arms, but a coy smile crept into his face. “Doubled their mass, huh?”

The professor nodded. “Yes, that’s what my studies showed.”

“Alright then, how do we do this?”

The professor visibly relaxed, and then beamed enthusiasm once more. “Splendid! Well, first, we’ll take a measurement so we have a baseline comparison of course. Take off your shoes and jacket and follow me.” Professor Walker then made his way back to his office, and Mikey quickly kicked off his shoes and jacket and followed him in. “Please close the door behind you, would you?” Mikey did, and then lay his shoes and jacket on the floor near the door.

Once inside the professor moved to a physician’s scale and motioned for Mikey to get on. “Now please remove your effects and we’ll weigh you in.” This brought Mikey up short, but he brought his shirt over his head, undid his belt and slid out of his jeans, and lay the pile of clothes near the door with his shoes and jacket. The professor coughed slightly and waved a hand at Mikey’s groin, “and your boxers I’m afraid.”

“What- why?”

Wringing his hands, professor Walker replied, “well, you could keep them on, but it will likely become very uncomfortable quite soon.”

This made Mikey’s eyes widen, but he obeyed and woodenly removed his boxers, standing there naked, hands over his groin. The display of modesty made professor Walker chuckle. “Now now, don’t feel embarrassed. I am a doctor, after all.”

“Oh yeah? What’s your doctorate in?” Mikey shot back.

The professor shrugged. “Molecular biology, but I’d like to think I’d bring the same level of professionalism and courtesy as an MD.”

Mikey snarked, but removed his hands and made his way to get on the scale. The professor wasn’t sure what the young man had to be ashamed of; the boy was more than adequately hung. Impressively hung, even.

Moving behind Mikey, Dr. Walker moved the scale’s weights back and forth, slowly zeroing in on the young man’s weight, while surreptitiously sneaking glances at his subject’s form. An average frame, but possessing a certain softness and a rounded middle suggesting the boy had been skipping the gym and snacking a little too much during late-night study sessions. This, along with his shyness, made him absolutely adorable. It almost made the professor regret the circumstances by which he’d found the boy naked in his office. Almost.

“About 220 pounds, or thereabouts,” the professor announced, and then marked it down on a paper on his desk. Then, he reached into a drawer in his desk, retrieved a small vial of blue liquid and grandly announced, “Now for the fun part, as they say!”

Mikey gulped. He was really doing this. If this worked, he’d put every other gainer on Gnosher to shame. If it didn’t, well, it probably wouldn’t kill him. Hopefully. “Do I just drink it?”

“Indeed, my boy, indeed,” he said handing the vial over to the young man.

Mikey sighed, “Well, here goes,” and drank the vial in one gulp. He stood there for a few moments, not sure what he was expecting to feel, before finally asking, “so how long does this stuff take?”

“Well, in mice it was metabolized in approximately 5 minutes or so. There’s no rushing science,” the professor added, waggling his finger for scholarly emphasis.

Mikey was beginning to wonder if the professor put on this much of a show during his classes, when he started to feel a wave of warmth build up inside, before gently crashing over him, only to do it again moments later. “Uh, professor? I feel something.”

“Yes? How do you feel? Describe the sensation.”

“Uh, warm? Like I have a fever, only it’s in my stomach. And something- urgh!” Mikey doubled over, clutching his stomach in pain, but while he did he found there was more stomach to clutch, and after a moment there was more still. His belly was rounding out more and more, the flesh expanding beneath his fingers like an inflating ball.

“Michael, are you alright?” Dr. Walker sounded genuinely alarmed and took a step forward, however Mikey waved him off and slowly righted himself. As he did he took a slight stumbling step backwards, causing the newly formed flesh of his belly to jiggle slightly. The completely alien sensation of a part of him moving well after he had stopped made his eyes widen in astonishment.

“Oh man, this is happening! I’m getting bigger!” Mikey exclaimed, ecstatic, all pain forgotten as he grabbed his belly to bounce and jiggle it in his hands. In moments it was large enough to have a fold over his waist, and he could lift and drop it with a faint slap of flesh meeting flesh. Then, another wave of heat, this time diffuse and all-encompassing, but without any pain at all. Mikey let it wash over him in rapt anticipation.

For his part, Dr. Walker was even more ecstatic than Mikey was. It was working! This boy was blimping up before his very eyes!  First in the gut, but he could see the rest of him was slowly catching up. His previously flat chest was budding into a pair of perky man tits, tiny areolas stretching wider as his new mammaries inflated with soft flesh. His entire chest now began to rise outwards like inflating dough, the skin softening with adipose as it accumulated beneath it. The softness then spread to his shoulders, down his arms, then up his neck and face, all of it becoming noticeably thicker with growth. In moments the boy had a double chin, round moon cheeks, and a fold of flesh at the back of his neck just where his short brown hair tapered off.

Soon It seemed as though his body was reaching capacity as folds and creases were appearing beneath his chest, arms and arm-pits, the billowing fat unable to be contained beneath the skin. It was then that the growth changed tack, now causing his frame to visibly broaden. Dr. Walker could almost hear the creak of bones as his hips, shoulders and torso enlarged and expanded, making him wide, heavy-set, and barrel chested. The folds of flesh disappeared momentarily as the fat spread out to cover the enlarging canvas, but soon reappeared as the expansion of his skeleton slowed, only now much further apart. With wider hips, Mikey was forced to shuffle his feet and widen his stance, thicker feet now splayed diagonally in order to balance the heavier load.

Mikey could not have been happier feeling each new curve and roll, each new bounce and jiggle as his frame packed on more and more and more. He rubbed his hands over his torso over and over, each time the sensation bringing something new, and becoming intensely erotic. He could tell between his much wider set thighs and beneath his protruding middle he was becoming aroused in front of an audience, but he was too turned on to care. He was getting everything he’d ever wanted all at once, and he was more than happy to ignore a spectator and simply enjoy each new sensation as he grew.

As incredibly erotic as the whole scene was for Mikey, it was even more so for Dr. Walker. The adorable young man was becoming the hunk of his dreams right in front of him, and it was becoming increasingly obvious as the well hung cock began to stiffen and rise to it’s full length, almost slapping the belly hanging above it. It really was impressive, and the sight of this hulking tank blissfully rubbing his chest and belly while his huge cock bounced beneath was more than enough to get the good professor hard as steel in his slacks.

“Oh god, this feels sooo goood,” Mikey moaned, hands never leaving his torso, and the professor could see a drop of pre began to form at the tip of his now turgid member. Doctor Walker was working up the nerve to reach out and touch the leaking organ, when he noticed Mikey’s growth was now redirecting south, his legs, ass and feet puffing up and filling out. Within moments each of his thunder thighs were the size of a normal man’s waist, but unlike the billowy flab of his torso each lower limb was a near solid ham as Mikey’s musculature became better able to handle the heavy burden he’d be carrying from now on. The only exception to this seemed to be his glutes, which not only blew up to this size of two basketballs but also retained a certain wobbliness, the massive globes fighting for space on Mikey’s backside.

Another moan brought the professor’s attention back to the young man’s groin. As each thigh grew thicker they began to press together, leaving less and less space for Mikey’s nuts. Each ball was now stretching the scrotum so thin the veins were clearly visible, and the professor was concerned if he didn’t do something the skin might tear. However, his concerns were expunged as just like the rest of his skin it stretched and grew, letting each teste rest lower and lower until they dangled halfway to his knees. It was then the professor noticed each teste not only sagged lower in a far more loose and dangly scrotum, but seemed larger than before, having gone from quail eggs to those of large chickens. This was certainly not something he had programmed into the formula, however he wasn’t complaining.

Fat began to accumulate in the boy’s groin, swallowing up more and more of the leaking spire, making it appear inches shorter than when he had walked into the office earlier. Yet as the professor leaned in to better observe the changes, he noticed he’d been wrong. Not only had the fat of the man’s pubis swallowed much of his length, his cock had indeed lost a fair bit of circumference, seeming much less massive than before. In moments the young man’s member was much more modest in size, and with the rest of him having grown so large it seemed seemed almost small. Mikey’s burgeoning middle prevented him from seeing this new development, and judging by the blissed out expression still painted all over his face he didn’t seem to notice, or care, about his loss in manhood. The professor hoped the expansion of the boy’s testicles would make up for it.

The complete alteration in frame, shape and the arrangement of fat on the body was all expected and shown in previous testing on laboratory mice, but the changes in his genitalia were never something the professor investigated in his previous trials. With these unexpected developments, the professor began to look out for other unintended side effects of the formula. Stepping back, he took stock of the much larger man Mikey was becoming. He was easily over 350 pounds, and while the growth of his skeletal structure and musculature seemed to have stopped, he could see the accumulation of adipose was still going strong. The boy’s face was nearly circular, chubby cheeks rounding out into a prominent double chin, that seemed to flow into the inflating chest, the young man’s neck having been swallowed up by the expanding tides of flesh. His chest had expanded from perky breasts to much larger man-mammaries, now sagging under their own weight, each eraser-head capped peak propped up by the tremendous tank below it. And what a tank it was, having gone from mere cask to barrel in the intervening period. Framed by love handles as thick as bread loafs and beginning to surge over the boy’s waist, it was a sight to behold. Mikey was more than enamoured with it as he jiggled and grabbed his wobbling middle, oblivious to the world and all that was happening around him.

“Eyes up here, professor.”

Or so Dr. Walker thought, but now Mikey was staring right at him, hands cupping each breast so they would squish into a provocative bosom. Above them the round, boyish face was just as provocative, a sly smile painted on his lips. “I see you’re enjoying the show,” he remarked, eyes pointedly looking at the obvious tent in the professor’s slacks.

For the first time that afternoon it was the professor who felt embarrassed, like a child with his hand in the cookie jar. He floundered, mouth moving but no words coming out, only stopping once Mikey swayed much larger hips. He gulped, frozen, his entire being overcome by lust. Finally Mikey walked towards him, his gait now an odd swagger as each titanic thigh was forced to move circularly around the other with every step. His entire body shook with each lumbering foot fall, an earthquake of flesh growing larger with each passing moment.

Mikey reached him and just stood there, belly mere inches from bumping the professor backward, seductive eyes still staring into his. Then the professor felt something soft and warm pressing into his torso and groin; it was Mikey’s belly. It had surged forward in the few seconds he’d been standing in front of him, and now his belly sagged enough that the lowest portions were rubbing against the professor’s hardon. Mikey tittered and then swayed his hips again, the soft flesh seeming to caress his aching cock.

“Why don’t you touch it?” He asked, grasping the professor’s arm to bring it to the warm flesh of his side. It was so soft, so smooth, his hand sinking in as he pressed further, encouraged by the now colossal college student. After sinking in an inch the two moaned simultaneously, the professor unable to hold himself back any longer. He brought his mouth down to smash into the young man’s chest, lips and tongue seeking the enormous nipple atop the pendulous moobs, slathering saliva all over the pale expanse before finally latching on to suckle with abandon. The professor’s free hands grasped and fondled the yielding fat of Mikey’s belly while he stood there, an unmoving edifice, moaning appreciatively as the older man worshipped his voluminous form.

Had the professor been paying attention he may have noticed the change in tone that had come over Mikey. His manner towards Dr. Walker was mostly ambivalent earlier, but now he was gratefully accepting his unbridled lust with eager enthusiasm. However the professor was beyond thinking rationally at this point. He licked and nibbled and bit the meat of Mikey’s chest, groping at his belly and love-handles as far as he could reach, noticing how hard it was to reach the entire circumference of his waist. He licked lower and lower on the mountainous middle, mashing his face as far into the yielding fat as it would go, eventually descending to his knees, a worshipper having reached mecca. Finally, he reached up to lift the tremendous belly to view the prize now hidden beneath the cascading tide of flesh.

Mikey was already hard as a rock from the professor’s attention, however even at full mast, and even considering the exorbitant flesh that surrounded it, he could tell that Mikey had lost much of his impressive length and girth. Even with his hand pressing against his now impressive fat pad, Mikey extended perhaps 4 inches at best. Resting the behemoth belly on his forehead, the professor leaned into the hot, humid groin to swallow Mikey whole.

He wasn’t sure how the professor was able to deep-throat him, but Mikey couldn’t deny it felt amazing. While the professor eagerly took his entire length over and over, Mikey stood with legs splayed, playing with each doughy breast and the huge nipples at their ends. He knew he was enormous now, larger than he’d ever thought he could gain naturally, and it felt so good to push and fondle and mold his own body, the feeling of size and weight and power. He began to thrust into the professor’s mouth, each movement causing his entire body to quake while sending his pendulous balls to slap into the professor’s chin.

For Mikey each thrust was the barest jerk forward, but for Dr. Walker it had the momentum of over 450 pounds of man bearing down on his face. The first thrust nearly knocked him over, causing him to lose his grip on the colossal belly, smothering him in a tidal wave of fat. He recovered though, and redoubled his efforts, both hands now holding up the prodigious paunch while meeting the next thrust with his open and accepting mouth.

The slap of Mikey’s balls on the professor’s chin filled the office, and while Mikey found he was able to thrust as easily as he could when he was thin, he was working up a substantial sweat after only a few minutes. Liquid dripped on his nose and forehead to gather into rivulets formed on the vast expanse of chest and belly, and he could only imagine how the pressor felt beneath the horizon of his middle.

The professor was more concerned with simply holding on, and only noticed the taste of precum on his lips as Mikey’s thrusting picked up pace. Each battering of balls and groin meat left him covered in the fat man’s sweat. However, the enormous, dangling orbs (that would surely leave bruises once this was over) were beginning to pull upward, and he knew Mikey’s climax was imminent.

Mikey knew he couldn’t last. The professor’s magic mouth took him to the root with each thrust, and the feeling of his entire body jiggling in tune with his lovemaking was simply beyond words. With a bellowing moan, Mikey squeezed each of his love-handles as hard as he could and came.

Even though he could feel the twitching of the dick in his mouth and the ascent of the gigantic balls, the professor was completely unprepared for the torrent of cum that gushed forth from Mikey’s diminished manhood. The first gush filled his mouth completely, while the second overfilled it, and the third made jizz come sputtering out comically from his nose and mouth. The sound of Mikey’s seed splattering on the linoleum floor of the professor’s office was more akin to a dropped cup of coffee than the missed remnants of an impromptu blowjob, and the professor wondered if this was yet another side effect of the formula or if the young man had possessed this ability all along.

After what seemed an eternity, the gushing of Mikey’s geyser slowed to a trickle, giving the professor time to swallow and, more importantly, breathe. He fell backward on his ass, the propped-up belly falling forward and jiggling Mikey’s front while the last drops of his orgasm fell to join the small puddle that had formed beneath him. He calmed down and took stock of his enormity once more, and sighed a deep, satisfied sound.

“Looks like your formula worked, professor.”

Still catching his breath, the good doctor could only manage, “Evidently.”

Mikey wobbled back to the professor’s desk, his lumbering gait somewhat more awkward than a man of his size already would be as he was getting used to his vastness. Noticing something, he bent sideways and picked up a distinct blue vial. “You know professor, there seems to be enough formula left for one more.”

The professor thought about it for a moment, acknowledging mentally that neither he nor his young charge had any clothes that would fit and would have to trundle home, jiggling and naked. He’d have to provide some sort of explanation to his friends and colleagues, and he could even be subjecting himself to the same sort of bizarre mental changes and even possible alterations of his genitalia as the deity of excess that was beckoning him onward.

He downed the vial without a second thought, and as he grew and burst from his clothes, Mikey fondling and groping each new roll as it appeared on his body, he knew without doubt that this was the climax of his professional career.

Bora Bora - Auston Matthews (smut)

Requested by anon: Idk if you’re taking requests rn or not but I would love love love an auston matthews smut. The longer the better. That boy is hotter than sin and I feel like he’d be glorious in bed.

A/N: I’m actually quite proud of this, like I actually like it. Let me know what you think! The seventh part of Casino Night will be up tomorrow.

Word count: 2355

Warnings: Smut. Explicit content. Probably some bad words.

Master list

Originally posted by martinfrks

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One-Sided

  The things that happened weren’t in order, but maybe in a pattern that you didn’t understood. Maybe it was a puzzle you solved long ago but chose to forget.

  Maybe it was the final show. Maybe it was the last time the curtain would close and you would bow.

  Maybe you were afraid of something you didn’t know all along up until now.

  Maybe it was the end right after it started.

  “Are you okay?”

  You greeted Harry the moment you walked into his office, his head bowed down before looking at you tiredly, a small smile on his face.

  His phone was mere inches away from him, his breathing slow and steady but there’s more to it, heaviness of emotion on the way he looks.

  “Tell me what happened.”

  “I’m okay, really.”

  You sighed, grabbing a stool and sitting beside him, your hand on his.

  “Tell.”

  “I — I have this friend. Named Alex. From Holmes Chapel.”

  He said suddenly, the words coming out of his lips with his hesitation, careful not to rush them because he was still racking his mind for the right words.

  “He had his girlfriend, together for three years to be exact. Told me every chance he could get that he’s completely in love with her. Even wanted to marry her.”

  Harry sat up, his eyes scrunching and intertwining his fingers together before clearing his throat to lighten the mood.

  “Then, at their 3rd year anniversary, he called me. Told me that she broke up with him. Already packed her things days prior and left on the day of it.”

  He closed his eyes, trying to remember every single detail that’s relevant.

  “Told me that they don’t talk anymore. Maybe not directly, but still kind of do. Like for example, through mutual friends, posts, captions, tweets and all that stuff. Then.”

  Harry dragged out the last word, making you wait.

  “Then, he called today. Said that she has a boyfriend, right on the day of their supposed 4th anniversary.”

  He rubbed his eyes that were slightly filled with tears, yawning. Your hands immediately in his shoulders as response.

  “Guess I’m just affected. Played a big part on my life, actually.”

  “What happened?”

  You said as soon as you bursted into the door of Harry’s office since his cries alarmed you, frustrated cries and groans and sobs were heard all the way downstairs and hearing him do all those pained you.

  He shook his head, his hands rubbing his eyes and his shoulders going up and down, his mind and self far from being okay.

  “Love, tell me. Shhh. Shhh.”

  You tried soothing him but it was no use, if anything, his cries became more violent to the point he was gasping for air, his heart hurting.

  “Look at me. No, no. Look at me.”

  He squeezed his eyes shut, a hand forming into a fist as he tried to take it all in, inhaling shakily.

  “She — she’s engaged.”

  You felt your heart dropping and your stomach twisting, the concern coming out of your chest since you didn’t know what to feel, feeling all the pieces come together.

  “You’re the Alex you were talking about?”

  You said it in a whisper yet you didn’t have a reason to, eyes stinging with tears that were threatening to fall.

  You finally cried after everything made sense but still didn’t, bringing your hands to your face and choking back a sob, your chest rising back and forth quickly.

  “I was a rebound?”

  Harry was unable to form his words since he found everything all of a sudden, all at the wrong time but even if it wasn’t, it’s still wrong and it made him upset even more, making him shake his head no weakly.

  “Then tell me, for fuck’s sake, just tell me where I stand in your life.”

  Your words were now broken and stuttered out, your mind racking for the reasons of how come you deserved this, frustrated when you didn’t find one.

  “I tried to fix you. Got broken in trying to.”

  You held up a finger to Harry, your breathing unstable and so is his, his eyes trained on the floor.

  “And this is what I get?”

  You gripped your hair, letting out a sound that was a mix of anger and sadness, more tears coming out by the second and a look of despair on your face.

  “I know I’m not her but why do you make it feel that I need to be?”

  You closed your eyes for what felt like seconds, the knot in your heart getting tighter with talking getting harder to do, the feel in your hands numbing.

  “After all this time, you couldn’t bring yourself to love me?”

  You weren’t particularly looking at anything, a fixed expression of straightness in your gaze overcoming you.

 "Even for a single moment?“

 You felt your all crash down, the stillness of your mind being completely interrupted with what you didn’t know, rendering what you feel useless.

  “I see you in everything. Every single thing. And I don’t know how to feel about that.”

  You chuckled humorlessly, feeling anything but happiness.

  “Guess I’m the only one who does that.”

//

2 | https://pendantstyles.tumblr.com/post/163003070976/one-sided-2

All My Friends Are Heathens, Pt.5

Summary: In an alternate universe where monsters roam freely among humans, eight of these creatures group together under one roof. Their newest member, a dark vampire, comes to meet their reoccurring house guest who may be more than what she seems.

Pairing: Bucky x Reader
Word Count: 4135
Genre: AU
Warnings: Mild language, sexual tension.
A/N: HEY IT’S BEEN MONTHS I KNOW BUT HERE WE ARE!! So remember how I lost the original 2000+ words I had written for Pt.5 before the file got corrupted? Well in this rewrite, I somehow doubled it so get comfy! Also, as a show of gratitude for your patience with me, I’ve been working really hard and I’ll be posting Pt.6 tomorrow and Pt.7 the day after! Three parts in three days, look at you! Just a heads up, Pt.8 will be the final update and then that’s it for this monster of a fic! I love you all so much and thank you for sticking around with me. ❤

P.S. I am such a little shit for extending the slow burn and I’m not even sorry about it…okay I’m really sorry, please don’t lynch me ILYOKAYBYE!

| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 Prequel | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5Part 6 | Part 7 |

Originally posted by taliesyne

Originally posted by hoaxvault

[Previously]

“I’ll see you tomorrow, James,” you said, blushing at the way he smiled back. Admiring the way his lips still looked full and plump as he grinned, and the way his long lashes fluttered against his cheeks.

Bucky passed his tongue over his fangs as he watched you walk away, just one more day and he would have you again.

“I made a promise, didn’t I?”


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Bughead from Archie Andrew’s POV, small fic

Before I post it, I just want everyone to know I am in no way insulting Archie’s character! His character is definitely still developing in the show for me. I do love him, and this is just my interpretation of how he would feel upon discovering Betty and Jughead. Rated T or even M for some heavy make out, body touchin schtuffz. No nudity or sex. Post Episode 6.  Disclaimer: I do not own Archie characters!

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anonymous asked:

Headcanons for Kakashi, Madara, and Tobirama with an s/o who's just rlly affectionate. Like, smiles at them a lot, tries to hug em a lot, says "I love you" a lot

My three favorite babes, and the ultimate hot trio! I hope you guys enjoy these, I had to cut myself off to keep this post from being too long. ~Admin Shadow

Kakashi, Madara and Tobirama with a S/O that is really Affectionate

Originally posted by sarapyon

Kakashi Hatake

• He doesn’t care if his partner is more affectionate; he actually would find himself enjoying it more over time. Even though he can get lazy in a relationship, having someone that is more lovey-dovey makes him want to be more physical. He will generally kiss them more, or says sweet and natural compliments to feel he is evening the score.

• Kakashi loves when his s/o hugs him, and he isn’t intimidated by the idea of returning the favor. Be warned, Kakashi is the type of boyfriend that will often sneak up on his partner and give them a surprise hug, while he whispers in their ear about how beautiful they look today.

• Loves if they play with his unruly hair – the feeling of fingers running through every silvery strand – and the occasional tug on his scalp feels warm and reassuring, especially if it’s right before they pull him into a kiss. It feels like something he would read out of a Icha-Icha book.

• He isn’t too big on public affection, but if him and his s/o are alone in a public area, he will hold their hand or attempt to steal a lchaste kiss. But other than that, he prefers to keep the romance private and intimate. If they beg, he might consider holding their hand in a market place or store for a brief amount of time.

• Kakashi has a teasing streak in him, and sometimes he will refuse to take off the mask and his s/o has to try to kiss him through it. He thinks it’s cute and he finds himself craving the feeling of their lips even more. Impatience will overtake him, and he will pull down his mask tantalizingly slow so he can kiss them fully on the lips. It’s worth the few second wait to feel his lips on yours, because Kakashi is a good kisser.

Originally posted by shisuithegreekgod

Madara Uchiha

• It would be very different for Madara at first, he wouldn’t consider it a turn off, but it would be harder to accept someone that was more open and mushy. He doesn’t want them to ever try to hug or give him a kiss in public because he has a stern reputation to uphold. Madara would thwart any public advances and he might have to even say something rude to them if they get too handsy.

• Madara would never mind his partner smiling at him. It means they are focusing on him, and not anyone else – and he can’t deny that his s/o has brilliant eyes. He might even try and stare them down, and he definitely isn’t afraid to allow his eyes to wander as he traces the fine contours of their body. Madara will basically try to undress them in his mind and eye fuck them.

• This man would have a hard time adjusting to hearing the phrase ‘I love you’ frequently. Those words have always been foreign to him, even from a lover. They would have to really get used to Madara refusing to reciprocate on those sentiments. It would be very rare to hear those words from him, mostly because he thinks his actions will speak for him as he proves his devotion.

• He will allow them to hug him or kiss him in private, and he will be more hands on himself. Madara can be domineering behind closed doors and he will approve of their normal attempts to kiss him or grab his hand. He will not be afraid to grab their ass, or run his hands up and down their sides trying to claim every piece of their flesh for himself.

• Even if he doesn’t mind being with someone more ardent when it comes to their affection, Madara still needs a break from such treatment. He will escape to the training grounds and hone his skills further or hid in his office and bury himself in his work; he just needs a break from the attention because he finds it overbearing at times.

Originally posted by sh1nob1

Tobirama Senju

• He is also someone that might not adjust well to having someone so affectionate. It will even take Tobirama some time for him to even accept small gestures of interest such them trying to hold his hand or cuddle up next to him in private. Hugs also made him go rigid at first, because the idea of close contact with another person was such an alien idea to him.

• He does expect kisses before bed and when he gets home from his duties at the Hokage’s office. Tobirama won’t settle for anything less than the most fervent kisses either. After a few kisses, and he had pulled them close, he might be worked up. He would talk about pinning them to the wall and having his way with them, as he feels them struggle to control their breathing.

• Tobirama will be strict about no public affection; it makes him uncomfortable. He does like when their gaze lingers on him. When his s/o looks at him he will sometimes send these glances that could just smolder their skin off because of the suggestive intensity.

• He does swell with pride when his partner tells him they love him. Tobirama only saves himself for someone he thinks is worthy, so every time he hears those words he can hardly contain his already inflated ego. He doesn’t say ‘I love you’ much, but with someone who is more open or affectionate he is likely to say he loves them more often than he is almost aware of.

• Tobirama also would be the type to escape from romantic attention, because he finds it cumbersome. He will first ask them to slow down on their affection, if that didn’t work, Tobirama would get a little distant just to avoid too many hugs or kisses, that would be the only way he would know how to cope.

what’s mine is mine.

Originally posted by jjks

requested by anon.

Can i please have a rough smut where one of the members get extremely jealous 🙈🙊🙊

genre: smut smut smut

a/n: it’s 6:51am as I’m posting this and idk why I’m posting this early but oh well :)

You were some fancy dinner with no other than Taehyung, it wasn’t just the company, it felt as though the whole world had been invited. These big, fancy parties were never your thing, nor Taehyung’s but the two of you had to attend for the company’s sake. You had to wear formal clothing and had assigned seats - now that wasn’t too weird, the weird part was that Taehyung was acting 103% serious which was highly unlike him, even if this was some big thing Taehyung would still joke around with you to make you feel more comfortable.

“Babe, are you alright? You seem a bit tense.”, you told him as you sat down in your assigned seats, where you found other BTS members and their partners. “I’m good, just Mr. ‘I Think I’m The Best’ over there keeps staring at my girl. I want to teach him a lesson or two but this is a really important dinner.” “You’re jealous?” “Sure, whatever you wanna call it; just don’t go near him? Please, it’s not that I don’t trust you, I just think he’s gonna do something to you if you do.” “Don’t worry, I’ll avoid him at all costs.”, you chuckled at his jealousy but knew deep down that it worried him when other guys looked at you, he was afraid of losing you to someone else.

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For @potato-fan-girl [loud whispers] ily!

Victory tastes sweet along Peter’s tongue. His muscles relax as he stares on at his handiwork where he’s tied up five jail escapees who were in the middle of robbing a convenience store. All he has to do is contact the police, and he gets to swing home along the high of another win for the heroes. 

He’s just pulling his phone out, still vibrating from excitement, when he feels it, something sharp and cold pushing into his side. His mind is slow to catch on for the pain is delayed, but then he feels it all at once, a knife being driven into his side by a sixth jail escapee who’s sudden appearance is a mystery to Peter’s wavering mind. 

His knees buckle, and he collapses to the floor with a pained gasp. “That wasn’t,” he starts around panting breaths, “nice.” The second the words leave his lips, he’s falling forward and crumpling in on himself while paralyzed by pain. 

The free criminal smiles down at him, and Peter can only watch on with darkening vision. 

He’s going to die. 

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CUDDLE BUDDY

Request by Anonymous: “Hi I would like to request a Bucky x reader where the reader is an avenger and is very touchy feely and hates sleeping alone so she ends up randomly sleeping in other team members beds and they’ll just wake up and she’ll be in their bed and they’ve all just accepted it. Buckys new and she ends up going to him and he wakes up with her in his bed and is all confused and has to go ask Steve about it and Bucky just ends up being all fluffy with the reader.”:

A/N: Thank you for the request!  Finally got my writing mojo back!  Hope you enjoy!

Bucky x reader

Word count: 1397 (yeesh, this turned out way longer than expected)

Summary: You are in need of constant physical touch, everyone on the team knows this.  But when Bucky joins the team and no one tells him about your craving for touch, things get a little awkward.

Warnings: none, I think

(GIF not mine)

Originally posted by 107th-infantry

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my holy jikook fic rec*₊˚ pt.2

here goes the list of almost 30 jikook fics that won my heart ♥ i hope you like them as much as i do :)

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Relentless | Calum Hood Series Pt.9

Originally posted by ifyou-takemyhand

                                                 Part N I N E 

Request: Being the cousin of Ashton Irwin was exciting, especially when invited to their tour to hang out with his best friends. You found yourself becoming fond of Calum Hood, who finds you annoying from your constant appearance. But what would happen if you stopped giving him that attention?

Word Count: 3k+

A/N: hi hi!!! gabs is back with another part. im so, so happy that everybody is enjoying this series. i made this part a bit more intimate, so i hope that makes everybody’s day (lol). tysm for all the support n love. 100 notes is the goal, but ik yall know this ! x

Parts: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty. [DONE]

                                                      I M A G I N E 

Arrival to Ireland, 13:02 P.M.

“We’re actually going to a party today,” Calum told you as the two of you started unbuckling your belts. People were already rising from their seats to scoop up their carry-ons and exit the plane. “We’re to head out in a few hours, but we’re leaving from the hotel.”

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