Spill Your Guts
A/N: I really wanted to write an LGBT reader so I came up with this little one shot, enjoy! Reader is Bi (or Pan!)
Word Count: 962
Warnings: overall grossness if you’ve ever watched the Spill Your Guts segment on The Late Late Show.
Dedicate this to my bisexual queen and fellow Cara lover @harry-writings 🌈
“…And for the last two, we have bird saliva and bull penis.” You can hear the crowd around you making shocked and disgusted sounds. You cover your mouth with your hands trying to hide the growing smile but also disgusted look that crosses your face. You honestly have no idea how you ended up in this situation.
You were absolutely flabbergasted when your manager told you that James Corden wanted you on the show to help promote your new movie. It would be your first time on the hit talk show and to say you were nervous, would be an understatement.
It’d be fun, they said. It’s a great marketing experience, they said.
But now here you were, staring down at the lazy Susan that was littered with products that would make even the strongest stomach queasy.
The first question was given to James. You were relatively a new and up and coming actress and didn’t really have anything to hide or be embarrassed about but you’re stomach still flipped with nerves at what he might ask.
“Alright…let’s start off with…” James turned the table around trying to land on the most disgusting thing. If you were being honest with yourself, there wasn’t anything on the table you would ever want to eat or drink before answering a personal question.
“Ah yes, a salmon smoothie. My personal favorite.” You couldn’t help the way your face contorted as you looked at the chunky smoothie that radiated an overwhelming scent into your nostrils. You laugh along with James as you just shake your head and wait for his question.
“You have been connected to both Harry Styles and Cara Delevingne.” James pauses his reading as he looks up to see you reaction. You can feel your cheeks starting to heat up as the crowd woos around you.
You had met Cara while filming the movie you were currently promoting and things had sort of moved pretty quickly between the two of you. You weren’t expecting the media frenzy that came along with dating one of the world’s most beautiful woman. It was a fast romance that had ended along with filming. Luckily, there were no bad feelings between the two of you and promoting the film together had not been awkward at all, no matter how much interviewers try to choke you both up.
You placed your hands on the table and leaned forward as you waited for him to continue.
“So my question is…Who is better in bed?” You try to stop your eyes from widening because you know the camera is trying to get the best close up of your reaction. The crowd’s hollering is almost deafening as you rack your brain for some answer that will get you out of this without saying too much about you ex girlfriend and your current, and still new relationship with Harry.
You look down at the salmon smoothie, which had chunks floating around the top, then back at James who has a smirk on his face that you want so badly to slap off.
“Okay so we’re getting right into this.” You whisper to yourself which causes James and the audience to laugh. ”You know…I actually just became a vegan so…” Your voice gets lost in the sound of the crowds shouting.
“No, no, no, I asked you if this was okay and you said yes!” You mentally slapped your past self, who only thirty minutes ago, agreed to do this segment.
“Well, I don’t—They’re both—I don’t know!” You hid your face in your hands as you stumbled over your words. You didn’t want to reveal too much information about Cara or Harry but you also didn’t want to drink the smoothie. You were still trying to come up with a way out when you’re mouth opened and began spouting out words before you could second guess them.
“I mean, um, they’re both good at—they’re both good at different things and—“ You were caught off guard again by the sound of the crowd screaming.
“Good?! You describe sex with Harry Styles and Cara Delevingne as only good?” You see the producers in the corner of your eyes raising and lowering their hands in an effort to quiet down the crowd.
“No! They’re both great it’s just—I don’t know! Oh my god!” You wish you never opened your mouth because know you were just saying things you would regret.
“Answer the question or drink the smoothie.” James replies smugly.
“Okay, my answer is,” The studio is suddenly eerily quiet. “They are both great in bed but—“ You get cut off again by the sound of the audience.
“But!” You raise your voice to be heard over all the noise. “But, they are both good—amazing, in different areas.”
Again, it takes a few moments for the crowd to settle down. Worry washes over you as you wonder how Harry will react to your revelation about your sex life with him. You knew Cara well enough to know she would think this was all hilarious but you weren’t quite sure how Harry would respond given that he was always such a secretive person, especially when it came to relationships.
“That wasn’t the question, so I’ll have to repeat myself.” James tried to keep a straight face but you could see a smile peeking through. “Who is better in bed?” He repeated.
“Fuck it.” You say as you lift the glass up to your lips, holding your nose so you don’t accidentally inhale the scent.
Laughter fills the room as you fill the chunky content go down your throat. You quickly spit it back up into the bucket next to the table before chugging down a glass of water as the crowd cheers around you.
Thank you for reading! I may do a little snippet of Cara’s and Harry’s reactions so let me know if you’d be interested!