this is hilarious.............

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the saga of linkin park getting kicked out at the ama’s by m_shinoda

so what if, Q is suddenly super not into takeing off his pants infront of james. becouse hes got a rash on his thighs. hes afraid james will think hes gotten an std from cheating but realy the rash is from his new pare of jeans. He got them to make his butt look fantastic but the tightness makes his thighs chafe and rash up - tobiismycat

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I really loved this prompt, hope you enjoy :) Jen.

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Q had no idea what to do with himself. None.

This was officially the worst thing in Q’s life ever. Ever. Quite genuinely. Q was trying to think through all of the things that had ever happened in his life to date and this, this was right up there amongst the Most Embarrassing Things Ever.

In his defence: the jeans looked stellar.

However, they had left him with a ridiculously itchy rash. A minor allergy to washing powder and overtight jeans was a bad things for Q’s skin, and it would take a couple of days to properly go.

“… nope.”

Bond blinked.

Q was always very touchy-feely, never really minded a playful grope or seductive kiss, certainly never minded Bond’s hands sliding under his waistband to cop a feel or twelve (horny git).

“… are you okay?” Bond asked instead, unsurprisingly a little concerned at Q’s reluctance. “You…”

“… I just, don’t feel like it,” Q replied, voice a little high-pitched, wondering how long this would last for.

As it happened, less than three hours.

“… okay no, what’s going on?” Bond asked immediately.

Q was wearing pyjama bottoms. Q never wore pyjamas, he professed to hating them; this was weird, this was wrong, and Q looked like a rabbit in headlights. “… nothing?”

“You’re a shit liar,” Bond replied drily.

Q thought through several thousand excuses, one by one by one, somewhat desperately.

“… okay look,” he managed eventually, “I’m going to preface this by saying that I have insanely sensitive skin, it’s why I always have fabric conditioner and hypoallergenic everything, but I managed to fuck up - you know those jeans you loved?”

“… yes,” Bond said slowly, somewhat perturbed by where this was going. “They’re excellent.”

“Yep, and they’ve also given me a…” Q was quiet for a moment, fidgeted a bit, “… a rash. And I didn’t want to tell you because it’s a rash and it’s my thighs so it looks really dodgy and I was worried you wouldn’t believe it was a rash from the jeans, which it is, but I basically sort of panicked and didn’t know what you’d think so I… why are you laughing?!”

“Because you’re being insane,” Bond snorted, with a strange look in his eyes that Q couldn’t understand. “Q, it’s a skin rash! I don’t care, I really don’t. Contact dermatitis, right?”

Q felt his jaw drop very slightly. “You…”

“I get it too,” Bond smirked. “Genuinely, I can’t wear suits without giving them a clean first, or it irritates my skin”.

“… oh,” Q managed.

A moment of silence.

“… so why are you still laughing?” Q asked, a touch defensively.

Bond stilled, smiled in a remarkably genuine way. “I just happen to love you,” he told Q gently. “Especially when you do things like this - I remember how much I love you.”

Q flushed from his cheeks down to his toes, more or less.

“Now get into bed,” Bond said fondly, “and wash those jeans - I want you wearing them again.”

Q’s expression shattered into a laugh, and he slid into bed, kissing Bond like the world was on fire.