this is goddamn bullshit

Like, I’m excited for the new Fire Emblem? But they damn well better hire some halfway decent writers this time because Fates was a mess. I had fun, but it was a goddamn mess of sloppy writing and plot holes and convoluted bullshit. Step up your game, guys.

me: i wanna grow my hair out really long….

also me: *hair gets my face One time* im gonna shave my fucking head this is bullshit i need a Goddamn haircut before i take the scissors and do it my own damn self 

Motherfucking Keith Kogane jesus christ fuck dude motherfucking Voltron bullshit jesus can you fucking believe this shit goddamn threaded the needle and fucking pilots and shit right fucking Holt siblings goddamn engineering the spaceship fuck yo shit i can’t even fucking believe this shit have you seen this shit fuck i just seen this shit fuck Keith Kogane man motherfucking The Tailor The Tailor you put in the time fuck put in the time motherfucking build shit with his bare hands fucking rival shit Keith Kogane no man i’ll just talk about Voltron all day shit man you have to be so interested in the shit i have to say about Voltron fuck dude i just formed it a year and a half ago fuck Keith Kogane man he fucked over The Tailor crazy Holts engineering trent resin or did the soundtrack fuck this guy who formed Voltron i don’t like dying i can’t think of who the fuck formed Voltron all i can think is the guy who has the role who formed Voltron who the fuck formed Voltron

THE RED PALADIN

things girls do that are attractive that are not dainty or typically feminine:

  • yell angrily about some shit they’re fired up about and make good points but really angrily
  • yell excitedly about something they’re excited about
  • accidentally hit things because they are Too Damn Excited
  • put their hair in a messy ass hairdo because it’s convenient
  • focus hella hard on some project or whatever that they’re doing
  • strong athletic muscle sports thing. i can’t personally relate because i’m weak but you keep going, strong muscle athlete girls
  • call out men on their bullshit
  • when they give a goddamn point-by-point speech to call men out on their bullshit and you can see it in their eyes that they are not fucking around today
  • sing while walking around even though no one is really listening and no one asked but they actually have a really good singing voice
  • flip their fucking shit when they see a cute animal
  • make terrible, terrible choices about nutrition and diet and have zero regrets
  • wear mismatched awful fashion that just looks bad. i genuinely love that tbh
  • wear fashion that looks Great but it doesn’t fit the setting like fucking cosplay or fancy dresses or suits in casual settings. like they just do not care it’s good
  • do something utterly silly that little kids do, like run to jump into a puddle or color with crayons, and are just happy about it
  • when there’s a class discussion and somebody says some wrong shit and they just say “actually!!! you’re wrong!” and don’t back down
  • talk about some thing that men make fun of women for caring about, like fandoms or cute singers or makeup or literally anything, and don’t hold back even though someone is rolling their eyes

anyway i’m worried some of this sounds sarcastic because tumblr is fond of mocking girls for bad fashion and things but i genuinely find all of this attractive. feel free to add

harry potter books rated by hinny
  • SORCERER'S/PHILOSOPHER'S STONE: ginny became the ultimate harry fangirl in .2 seconds. 8/10.
  • CHAMBER OF SECRETS: harry literally saved her life and also described her face as glowing like the setting sun what kind of poetic shit. 12/10.
  • PRISONER OF AZKABAN: the ridiculous "making eye contact and trying not to laugh when people do weird things" that they do started what kind of soul mate bullshit. ginny made him a goddamn singing get well card when will your otp. 9/10.
  • GOBLET OF FIRE: ginny started relaxing around harry and we all cried. had the opportunity to ditch neville and go with harry instead but like the Perfect Bean she is, kept her promise wtf harry marry her. 9/10.
  • ORDER OF THE PHOENIX: told off harry effin' potter like it was her JOB lbr he was attracted to it. ginny came up with the name dumbledore's army and also was never weird about harry and cho what a respectful. harry was totes in love with her but didn't know it yet. 8/10.
  • HALF BLOOD PRINCE: harry spends most of the book being an idiot and pining and we all cry. SEVERAL SUNLIT DAYS!!!!! WHAT KIND OF!!!!! GINNY JOKING ABOUT HARRY HAVING A TATTOO ON HER CHEST HAS SHE SEEN HIM SHIRTLESS TO CONFIRM?? TATTOO THIS CHAPTER ON MY CHEST!!!! they break up because they're both noble and stupid i'm gonna cry 50/10.
  • DEATHLY HALLOWS: making out in ginny's bedroom aka me sobbing. harry checking the marauder's map to make sure she's okay, hoping she can sense his gaze jesus CHRIST HARRY LITERALLY ALMOST DITCHING HIS ATTEMPTS TO KILL VOLDEMORT BECAUSE BELLATRIX TRIED TO KILL GINNY CHILL PLS!! they get married and ginny loves harry so much she allows him to make questionable name choices we all cry!!!!! 5745938467983476/10.

Out of a U.S. population of 250,000,000 eligible voters, roughly 30 percent actually voted for our president-elect – and I’m willing to bet a great deal of those did it only because they hated Hillary’s guts as much as the left hates Trump. For the American people, this was a battle of spite – the political equivalent of the ending of Se7en. And now that we’ve purposefully failed this Jigsaw trap, the “victors” aren’t exactly whistling “We Are The Champions.”

In short, no matter who had won, they were going to start as the least popular president in a long while. Only here’s the one key difference: Unlike Trump, Hillary Clinton has endured 30 goddamn years of grade-A American bullshit … whereas T-Money can’t handle so much as a SNL sketch or reasoned plea without a 12-hour Twitter whine-and-jeez party.

I hate to break this to you, future-President Trump (we both know you read all my work), but even popular presidents get booed a whole lot. Obama was a brainy personified bear hug of a man, and even he got 30 death threats a day. Because no matter your charm, there is always going to be a large group of people getting triple-screwed by the system. And policies and party completely aside, Donald Trump has no charm. In fact, Donald J. Trump has all the social and sexual appeal of a maternity ward fire. He’ll be the first president with less charisma than the foam puppet version Gwar slaughters on stage.

And as he desperately attempts to rectify this, that 30 percent who were invigorated by his fringe message will no doubt hate his attempts to appear moderate for the other 70 percent. And while he could turn this all around with a smart and caring political support system, there’s one little problem …

5 Signs Donald Trump Is Going To Hate The Next Four Years

Fluffy Bees~ for bibbityboppitybullshit.

“Yang don’t you dare! Don’t do it! Don- AIKAFLABAARG!”

The blonde’s hysteric laughter could be heard alongside her girlfriend’s shrieking and sputters. Yang had just dumped and entire pot of water over Blake’s head. Predictably, Blake was not amused. 

“Y-You’re the one who said it was hot in here, Blakey!” Yang said through her giggles. “So your solution is to pour freezing water all over me?!” the faunus yelled.

“Oh, c’mon! It wasn’t even ice in there!” Lies. The water was melted ice, so it was still pretty freaking cold. Yang decided to poke the bear a little more. “I guess its true kitty-cat. You hate water” The brawler bursted into guffaws again.

That gave Blake an idea. “Hmm. I wonder then. If I hate water…then are you really fire-proof, Dragon?” Yang was confused and expressed as such, tilting her head to the side. “Huh?” 

Quick as a flash Blake whipped out Gambol Shroud and switched to Burn Dust. Aiming at Yang, she allowed a small smirk to fall onto her face. “Let’s test it, shall we?”

“OH SHIT!” At this point Yang had figured out what was happening and turned around to try to run and escape- of course it didn’t work and Blake opened fire. Litterally. 

“OW! BLAKE STOP! OUCH! YOU’RE GONNA HURT SOMEBODY!” Her Aura was protecting her from damage but it still hurt like a bitch!

Of Course her girlfriend didn’t listen. 

“Get back here Yang! Your Kitty-Cat’s feeling Curious!” The brunette exclaimed.“OW! CALM DOWN! BLAKEY C’MO-OUCH! DON”T SHOOT AT MY ASS!” Yang shouted.

———————————————————————————————————–

“Should we stop them?” A certain crop-weilding witch asked her boss and colleague A loud slurp was his response. “No need, Glynda. Let them have their fun.” “Okay, but Im not cleaning this up.” she said walking away.

———————————————————————————————————–

“OUCH! MY BUTT IS SENSITIVE BLAKE! OW! OW! OW! STOP IT!”

Motherfucking Jacksepticeye Jesus Christ fuck dude Motherfucking green hair bullshit Jesus can you fucking believe this shit?  Goddamn hair dye and fucking Markiplier and shit right fucking Watermelon Twins goddamn dyeing their hair fuck yo shit I can’t even fucking believe this shit have you seen this shit fuck I just watched this shit fuck Jacksepticeye man.  Motherfucking Markiplier Markiplier you put in the livestream fuck put in the livestream motherfucking promise shit with his pink hair fucking best friend shit Jacksepticeye. I’m very tired.  No man I’ll just talk about the pink hair all day shit man you have to be so interested in the shit I have to say about the pink hair fuck dude I just watched it last night fuck Jacksepticeye man he fucked over Markiplier crazy Watermelon Twins dyeing their hair Jack did the green hair fuck this guy who agreed to this I don’t like dyeing I can’t think of who the fuck chose pink hair all I can think is the guy who’s friends with the guy who chose pink hair who the fuck chose pink hair?

MARK FISCHBACH

I hate when people tell me “only you can change your life for the better”, um excuse me, like have I not been trying to do that for years? All I’ve ever fucking done is try make my life better, and is it? No it’s a big pile of fucking shit. So just fuck off with your “positive” fucking bullshit. It’s all a load of goddamn bollocks!

also i really fucking resent the amount of influence america has over the entire goddamned world like i don’t ever recall any bullshit about the french prime minister’s vice president or whatever having such a gigantic hold on the very lives of the children of france but maybe that’s because america’s selfish ass has to be the center of attention and nuke everyone who doesn’t compliment their new hairstyle

“Well just Steven didn’t agree to Bismuth’s ideals and doesn’t make it okay to get mad about that because he’s just a 14 year old kid”

I mean? The problem wasn’t really just that?? It was that they used a 14 year old child who has no experience in war to spout liberal bullshit?? OFC he’d be horrified he’s a goddamn child and Bismuth most likely didn’t understand and how their thought processes work.

People later acknowledged that Steven was allowed to disagree with Bismuth and it makes sense for him to have a more pacifistic approach but because of bad writing the writers needed a reason to shelve her even though Rose later killed Pink Diamond and did exactly what Bismuth wanted… and yet bismuth was still bubbled

*traditional 1960s white christian family sits around the table for dinner*

Father: thank you lord, for this bountiful m-

Mother: *jumps up, rips the table cloth off, shoves a handful of mashed potatoes in her mouth, rips off her pearls* No! God did not spend 3 fucking hours cooking your goddamn meatloaf and casserole bullshit in heels! I did, motherfucker! Fuck you guys, I’m going to start an all-womens commune and I’m never curling my hair again! You little fucking… Mumble Mumble …

When people say they don’t think computers will ever be able to be conscious in the same way that humans are, I just hear, like. “It is impossible for computers to be sentient!”, says sentient albeit biological computer, somehow thinking that this is convincing despite it apparently being contradicted by their own existence.

I’m so glad that the human brain exists in order to show us what’s possible. You can bet that if we didn’t all have them in our heads there would be people setting some arbitrary marker based on current technological trends and saying, “it is impossible for technology to get any better than [this point that we’ll reach 40 years from now].” Not that people don’t do that anyway, especially in other fields, but even in computing. But like, the existence of the brain allows that to fairly easily be called out as bullshit.

The brain is a goddamn miracle. You know those movies where the alien spaceship crashes, and people reverse-engineer the alien tech and utilize themselves? Well, that’s essentially what we have with the human brain, and other complex biological systems, except we’ve hit the jackpot with something so far beyond what we could even conceive of in those science fiction movies if we didn’t already have it to look at. It takes the scientists what, 30, 40 years to figure out how to reverse-engineer and replicate the alien force field tech? Well, we’ve come packaged with this computational bolt from the sky for upwards of 200 millennia, and we’re just now starting to figure out how it probably works. That’s how long it took for the human race to catch up to our biology, and we are powered by these selfsame incredible machines.

And we’re still not even there yet. Right now, scientists can look at the brain through a microscope in as much detail as they want, but they still don’t really fundamentally understand how it works. Sure, they know how individual cells function, but on a macro-scale? It’s still largely guesswork. We are far from having reverse-engineered it yet. But we’re getting there. We’re getting close to getting there, which is why this is such an exciting time to be alive, with our technology finally beginning to, at least marginally (and largely thanks to the exponential acceleration of its development), starting to catch up with our biology.

It’s been a long time coming, folks. 200,000 years in the making. Personally I’m excited to see what lies at the end of the road, when we master our own hardware and can start improving on ourselves.