this is getting to be a personal affront to humanity

More Humans are Weird

Because this hash tag is SO FUN and thought-provoking. 

No one can keep up with humans and gender. There are no easy signs to tell who is what, not clothing, not body morphology, not how they paint themselves or their grooming or vestigal hair. The humans themselves argue about how many genders there are. Eventually they quit trying and refer to all humans as ‘they’. Most humans are fine with that, even compliment them on their support (?) and progressive views (??). A few humans are offended, but are shouted down by their other humans. The other beings of the galaxy officially give up. 

Some humans want to have sex all the time. Others barely can stand to be touched at all, even casually. Some will have sex with their own gender, which does not produce offspring and is confusing to many. Some will have sex only with certain people, some will have sex with anyone. SOME will have sex with other species, occasionally challenging their own safety and everyone else’s. None of this is considered strange. Anyone saying it is strange is again shouted down and shamed into silence. The other beings of the galaxy officially give up. 

Humans adopt small predators as pets and kiss their “widdle faces” and giggle over their clawed toes (???) and fuss and are thrilled when the predators sleep with them (isn’t that UNSAFE? IT IS FULL OF POINTY BITS) and often sport scratches and bite marks inflicted when the animal was ‘playing’. 
“When were these ‘cats’ domesticated?”
“Oh, we never really domesticated them. We just let them move into the house with us. Aren’t they CUUUUUTE? Come here, baby.” -kissy noises-
The other beings of the galaxy again give up. 

Wars fought. Millions - probably billions, through history - killed. Crew members huffy with each other. Various holidays celebrated, none of which make sense, some of them celebrating events that are physically impossible and could not have happened. All for something that can’t be proved. 
The other beings of the galaxy would think this was all an elaborate prank if it wasn’t for the body count. 

Humans get INFECTED and act as if it is a personal affront, and cuss about it. They confine themselves to quarters so they don’t infect the rest of the crew - very kind, in that respect - and otherwise wrap themselves in bedding and bitch about it for three days while doing their work by remote - “It’s fine, just a cold.” followed by horrifying noises they call ‘coughing’ and ‘sneezing’ -  and HOW. HOW DO THEY EVEN. 
The other beings of the galaxy, for whom infection is always life-threatening, boggle from a safe distance. With respirators on. 

They come from a death planet, these naked apes with no armor, no fangs, no speed. They have the ability to conquer the galaxy, if they only agreed with each other long enough that it was their goal. Instead they poke their noses into other death worlds, ‘exploring’, they call it, adopting horrifying creatures and making friends with other predatory beings, brewing poisonous beverages from whatever they can scrounge, which they then drink for fun. The rest of the galaxy is relieved. If humans had an attention span, they would truly be in trouble. 

No one wants to know what a ‘shark’ is. Humans seem to be afraid of them, and if it frightens the humans, the rest of the galaxy is, to a being, terrified. 

Swerve X Reader – A Human Crewmate - Chapter 2

Chapter 2 - Changes

A/N – Based on a lot of @rocksinmuffin head-canons so extra special thanks to them for that. Special thanks to the commenters on the last chapter for being super awesome, @tranformers-4-life @lilysflowershop

Warnings – None.

Rating – T

After much debate between the four bots who knew of your presence, it was finally decided that they’d have to tell the crew about you; they couldn’t exactly keep you hidden like some sort of pet and you couldn’t live the rest of your life in one room, never getting out. However, with advice from Rung and Ultra Magnus, it was decided that the crew would only find out when you were ready. As such, Rodimus would visit your ‘room’, which wasn’t much more than a metal desk with a hastily crafted bed and toilet on top of it, to ask if you were ready on a daily basis daily. Each day for a week you gave him the same answer, ‘no’, before heading back to bed.

You realised it was somewhat pathetic that you were hiding away in your room, neglecting bodily care but you could barely come to terms with never seeing Earth again, let alone being stranded with an alien race. Fortunately, as far as thinking ahead and taking care of yourself went, Ultra Magnus had the food problem covered and while the food wasn’t amazing, it did sustain you. Rung meanwhile, also visited daily, repeatedly asking you to see him as a patient, whilst also trying to respect your request for space; when you wanted to talk, you’d ask.

Eventually, your bodily odour got the better of you. It served as a reminder that you had to help yourself or slip further into the bleakness of depression. With one more day to gather courage, you awaited the return of Rodimus.

Rodimus was ecstatic to hear that you were ready, mainly because he was having a hard time keeping you a secret; the crew would be so excited. Despite his elation, you had a few requests to make of him first.

“Sure, sure,” he answered confidently, “whatever you want. If I can get it, I will.”

“Okay,” You said, thinking of your list. “First off, I need a proper room Rodimus, I’m talking one with a fully-equipped bathroom, and I won’t go out before that because I really need a shower. Then there’s the little things like a washing machine and dryer, a proper bed, not that this one’s too bad. Also, clothes, these ones need washing,” you tugged your shirt. “Oh yeah, food. Magnus isn’t doing too bad but he’s not human and putting peanuts in butter doesn’t make peanut butter so like, I need to see what stores he has to see if it’s going to last… are you even listening?”

Rodimus’ optics had glazed over and he was grinning broadly; he was actually planning his speech to the crew and getting to the ‘Til all are one’ part when you called him out.

“Sure I am, you said bathrooms,” he answered, affronted.


“And some other stuff too.”

You glared at him, “Rodimus, this is important, do I need to get Magnus for this or are you going to listen?”

“Alright, fine but we’re going to need someone else for this job.”


“(Y/N), meet Brainstorm, he’ll build all that human stuff you need,” Rodimus introduced a blue and white bot who had a scrutinous gaze or so you thought; the face plate unnerved you, it made Brainstorm’s emotions hard to read until he spoke, reflecting his personality in his voice.

“Magnificent,” Brainstorm marvelled, inspecting you.

“Oh, um thanks,” You replied, feeling awkward.

He laughed, “No, not you. It’s magnificent that you get to meet me. After all, I’m clearly the smartest being you’ve ever encountered.”

“And the humblest,” You added under your breath.

“Anyway, lucky for you, you get to spend your time with me while I build your room.”

“Ha, yeah, about that, I actually have to see Rung about something, unless you need me here.”

“Even better, now it’ll be a surprise.”

“…Right. Rodimus, can you sneak me to Rung please?”

Rodimus smiled cockily, transforming into a car before your very eyes. You stared, stunned and unsure of what to do or say. The door opened, inviting you in and making the situation stranger still. You weren’t concerned about yourself, for surely it would be like any other car ride but would it feel bad for Rodimus? Like a parasite that needed ejecting. Gingerly, you sat in the front seat, feeling out of sorts as a seatbelt wrapped over you. With a whoop of joy, Rodimus sped off towards Rung; you’d been wrong, it wasn’t like anything experienced before.

Fortunately, Rung was alone when you arrived, allowing Rodimus to let you out and transform back.

“Resident human here to see you Ring but first, how was that (Y/N)?”


“Speechless huh, so cute. Well I don’t mean to brag,” Rodimus crowed, clearly bragging, “but that’s definitely the best ride any humans ever had.” He didn’t leave time to respond as he left the room, whistling.

“I have a feeling he’ll be quite hard to keep up with,” You noted quietly.

Rung chuckled, “Never a dull moment, that’s for sure. Now, I’m glad you’ve come to see me (Y/N), is there anywhere in-particular you’d like to start? With Earth, perhaps?”

A dull throb of pain resonated within you at the mention of the home you’d never see again, leading you to retort, “Oh no, none of that psyche stuff, not today. I just came to ask some questions, if you don’t mind.”

“Absolutely, whatever you want to know, uh, would you like to sit?”

A quick glance around the room revealed the difficulty of finding an appropriate spot. You scanned every surface, smiling at the model ships, big enough to fit you in, and what you presumed were sweets for Cybertronians. After a minute, you spoke, “I’ll take the desk, if you’d give me a lift please.”

Rung obliged, lifting you to the desk, where you sat cross-legged; he sat opposite, on his chair, waiting for you to speak.

“I guess my curiosity finally got the better of me. First off, do Cybertronians have gender constructs? If so, are you all male?”

“We do pertain to genders yes but not all bots are male. After the war however, our females were scattered.”

“War? Hang on, we’ll come back to it in a minute. How long do bots live?”

“Billions of years, our bodies simply go on with the proper care and attention.”

Your mind reeled at the possibility of living that long; it was incomprehensible what you’d do with that much time. “How will the others re-act to me?”

“I’m afraid I can’t say, just like you couldn’t say how each individual human on your planet would re-act to me; only time will tell.”

“Rodimus… he told me about a co-captain, Megatron. Why won’t Megatron see me? He knows I’m here, Ratchet told me.”

“Megatron is… troubled, especially by organics. Once you learn of our war it will become clearer.”

The answer was dissatisfying, it left too much unsaid. “Alright then, tell me about the war, the crew, the ship and its quest, no matter how long it takes.”

After hours of explanations from Rung, multiple queries from you, and several questionable snacks brought in by Magnus, you had a decent knowledge on Cybertronian history as well as the answers you’d been looking for. It was almost terrifying to think about how one bot’s reasonable disdain against an unfair system led to the destruction of countless worlds and the citizens who lived upon them. Then again, humans hadn’t been so different within their own species; one should never forget the acts of power-hungry men such as Hitler, Stalin, and Mussolini. However, nobody was asking you to meet Hitler and treat him with indifference; how could you do so for Megatron?

Before you could ask more about then mysterious co-captain, a call came through Rung’s comm-link, informing him that Brainstorm was finished and Rodimus was on his way back to pick you up; something you were thankful for because exhaustion was beginning to set in. Politely, you thanked Rung for his time, assuring him again that you’d be back if you wanted to talk about life’s deeper matters. He saw you out with a smile, hiding his worry about your mental welfare. As a psychiatrist, he had to trust that you’d keep your word and come to him, though he wished, not for the first time that he could make you stay and release any bottled-up emotions that might harm you later down the line.

“So, what do you think?” Brainstorm beamed.

You gaped at the room before you. It contained everything you needed and more. It was still set on the table so nobody would accidentally step on you if they came to visit or went in the wrong room accidentally. There was a kitchen with all the sparkling, chrome appliances you could never afford on Earth, like the kind featured in glossy magazines or on TV. The bathroom was the only room with walls added around it to ensure your privacy. Many luxuries had been added, including a TV bigger than a cinema screen against a wall across the room. Another wall had been completely replaced with glass, showing the vastness of space outside. Even the bedroom was spectacular, including several wardrobes (yet only two other outfits), the new bed was a canopy bed, like something a princess might have. Yes, the room had everything you needed and more, there was only one problem. No matter where you looked, pictures of Brainstorm were printed on every surface. The bed spread had a full-body image of him finger-gunning, the shower curtain was him in a rather promiscuous pose, the table which served as your floor held different closeups of him; lamp shades, cushions, even a dress which had been brought in for you. Everything depicted him.

“Aww, who’re we kidding? You love it, I can tell. How could you not? I am after all, your favourite mech. Hmm… I do wonder if I should sign any of it, would that be too much?”

“I um, right now, I- I think you’ve done enough,” You said, finally finding your voice.

Brainstorm sagged slightly, “Oh.”

“No! I mean, I love it but I wouldn’t want to ruin your uh, artistic vibe, by asking you to do even more for me.”


“Uh, it’s just… I mean…” You sighed, “I suppose the bed wouldn’t be complete without a signature.”

Instantly perking up, Brainstorm signed the bed with a laser pen, making it permanent. It read, “From the mech you live for, Brainstorm.

Considering his sudden burst of energy, you realised quite how manipulative he could be; it was all an act.

“And now, as much as I’d love to stay, I have much more important science-y stuff to do, bye,” he let himself out, leaving you alone once more and very overwhelmed.

You were unsure of what to do first. Despite your need for sleep and a shower, you found yourself staring outside, to the vast expanse of space; looking out there, at the cold darkness that had come close to being your demise, you felt more alone than ever. The thought made you cry. 

Title: Prodigium

Pairings: Prinxiety (interaction) and Moxiety (familial)

Fandom: Sanders Sides
[Thomas Sanders]

A/N: This is set in an alternative universe where the sides are their own beings and not parts of Thomas’s personality. Also since we don’t know Anxiety’s name yet, he will be called Angelo here.
Not beta’d please forgive the errors


This was the fourth.. No. The fifth town they moved into in only a course of three months and he was getting pretty sick of it.
This town was near a beach and he and his brother managed to get a secluded place by the ocean.

It was admittedly a beautiful place, the sound of waves crashing to the shore was very calming and the air was a cool salty breeze.

No use getting attached to the place though, they’ll end up being ran out by an angry mob in a week.

“Don’t be so negative.” His brother scolds him in a gentle voice, “things will be different this time. We just have to be careful.”

“No matter how careful we were we always end up being found out” he scoffs, “why don’t you just kill me and rid yourself of this misery.”

“Angelo,” his brother’s voice was soft.

“Please don’t talk like that”

Angelo breathes out a defeated sigh, “I’m tired Patton.” Another sigh, “I’m so tired of hiding and running”

Patton sits next to him proceeding to pull the younger man into him.

“I can’t begin to imagine how hard things are for you” Patton speaks running a hand through the other’s hair, “but all I can give you is this. Fingers soothingly massage scalp ” just me being by your side.“

Angelo closes his eyes allows that to be enough.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

What changes would you make to dragon age if you could?

Massive Disclaimer:  I am not looking to hold a public conversation over Tumblr.  I am presenting my opinions because that is what was asked of me.  If people want to share their opinions with me or have a discussion, then I would invite them to do so privately–i.e. through unanonymous asks/fanmail/or through contacting me on Skype/Steam.  

Keep reading

Fuck you Scotland.

I am furious and disgusted by my countrymen… no, by just over half of my countrymen, those who voted to remain under the heel of the British empire, bought off by a promise of extra power over your destiny at the price of ABSOLUTE power over your destiny.

You voted for austerity, for the bedroom tax, for secret courts, for welfare cuts, for national service bills, for nukes, for wars for tyranny and for the mountains of dead this revolting establishment is built upon.

Every disabled person who gets worked to death by the state, every pensioner who freezes in their home, every affront to human dignity brought to bear against the poor by the rich is on YOUR conscience.

You voted away your chance to be something beautiful, and do you think they’ll thank you?

You won’t even get to lick the gravy from their chin.

anonymous asked:

Out of curiosity, are you against veganism itself or just against vegan activism? Like I'm against making any law prohibiting the use or consumption of animal products but it's also not my personal choice. (But that's because I think the government and basically everyone should get out of everyone else's way.)

Humans are natural omnivores. To be vegan is an affront against God. To be vegan is to deny human nature. If you’re vegan, you don’t love yourself. Do I think it should be illegal to be vegan? No, certainly not. But I don’t condone it. And if you force your child to eat a vegan diet and he or she is malnourished or behind the growth curve, you’re guilty of child abuse.

anonymous asked:

Hi! First, I want to say that I love your blog. It's so informative and funny and supportive. I am a pre-med sophomore majoring in Medicinal Chemistry dreaming of becoming a neonatologist. However, sometimes I worry because I care a lot about what people think of me and I worry that I will run into hard-ass teachers, attendings, (or patients for that matter) and it will run me down. How do you balance taking criticism constructively and remaining confident in your ability as a doctor?

Criticism comes in one of two ways:

1. constructive - the kind that is encouraging, or at least has the goal of making you better at what you do.

2. destructive - the kind that exists only to make you look stupid and your criticizer look good.

Every time you encounter criticism, decide for yourself which type you have encountered. If it is meant to be constructive, even if it comes across a little harsh (or very harsh), you have to take it in stride and work towards bettering yourself. If it’s the second type, you can blow it off. Criticism for criticism’s sake is not helpful at all, and thus you shouldn’t pay any attention to it. 

The constructive criticism that is delivered in harsh words is the most difficult. With that type you just have to remember that some people’s methods might not be the greatest even though their goal is the same as yours. The most obvious example of this I can think of is surgeons who swat hands or pimp mercilessly in their ORs. Some do it purely to embarrass. But for the most part they do it to make you better.

As for maintaining your confidence—ultimately criticism should build your confidence. If someone critiques you, fix what they pointed out and rest assured that the next time it comes around you will be able to stand up confidently against their test. The more you do that, the better doctor you become. 

You also have to remember that truly constructive criticism is not personal. Your attendings don’t criticize you because they hate you (usually). Actually, some attendings tend to be harder on the people they like because they have higher expectations of them. It’s not an affront to you as a human being. It’s to make you better at what you do. 

I used to get really upset when I got nitpicky criticisms from attendings (still do, to some degree), but then a friend pointed out that my criticisms were nitpicky because I was doing well on all the obvious stuff. When you’re doing well, they have to work harder to find things to critique you on. So remember that when you get faced with criticisms that seem petty or small. Let that boost your confidence a bit.