this is from my car ride today

Blurryface Themed Asks
  • Heavydirtysoul: What are you afraid of?
  • Stressed Out: What are you stressed about?
  • Ride: Whats your dream car?
  • Fairly Local: Favorite place?
  • Tear In My Heart: Are you single?
  • Lane Boy: Dream vacation?
  • The Judge: Do feel guilty about anything?
  • Doubt: Do you have any doubts?
  • Polarize: Do you prefer hot or cold weather?
  • We Don't Believe Whats On TV: Whats your favorite show?
  • Message Man: Last person you texted?
  • Hometown: Where are you from?
  • Not Today: Whens your birthday?
  • Goner: Do you miss anyone?
Don't Tell Me What To Do

I work at what is essentially a hardware store. This particular store has a policy that all animals are aloud inside on a leash, so not only do we get dogs and cats, we also get tons of farm animals like goats and pigs and once in a while a mini horse. All the employees love it and carry treats in their pockets and management doesn’t care if we pet or play with the animals as long as we aren’t ignoring other customers and they actually encourage it because it’s good for building customer relationships

Anyways, I had a closing shift today and the store was dead. I literally only checked out 50 people, when the daily average is closer to 300, so everything was cleaned and put away and ready to go super early. My dad stopped by to say hi on his way home from work and he brought my dog with him because she loves car rides and gets super excited every time she sees me at work. So it’s 3 hours to close and I was petting my dog and deep cleaning the counters and talking to my dad and I literally had not had a customer in an hour.

Cue two guys marching in the store and messing stuff up. They walk through my dirt piles and track mud and manure all over the store and spill feed and mess up the bulk hardware. They mess up the clothes that I had just fixed and leave piles of jeans and shirts on the floor and walk all over them. They pick up a dozen bags of blasting grit (you know how when you go to the beach you find sand in your crevices days later? That’s basically what the blasting grit does) and they lug them around the store. The bags are always leaking so they leave a trail of grit through the entire store (and it’s a nightmare to clean up. It’s like glitter and sand had a child that was raised by Lucifer himself). After a couple hours they finally come up to the register and I start ringing them up. They are super rude and obnoxious and I’m trying my hardest not to lose my temper and they keep calling me ‘baby’ and 'sugar’ and standing too close and they keep touching me and being awful. All of this combined is making me super anxious, which my dog picks up on (I’ve trained her to notice and help when I have panic attacks) so she walks over and pokes her nose through the gap between the register gate and the back and whines. While I’m waiting for the guys to swipe their card I reach over and pet her nose to let her know that I’m ok and one of the guys glares at me and shouts 'Don’t you dare pet that dog! You can’t pet that dog!’ And I just lost it because wtf? I dropped my fake smile and my customer voice and said “That’s my fucking dog and I can pet her whenever the fuck I feel like it.” They huffed and left and they called the store after to complain. Fortunately my manager had seen the whole thing and he is really reasonable and knows that I never lose my temper like that ever so I didn’t get in too much trouble. He just said that if those guys came in again I had to call someone else to ring them up because they “never wanted to see my face again” because I had been so “incredibly rude and obnoxious” Cry me a river tick turds.

Our Grandmothers Had Abortions

Vice President Pence is marching today in the anti-choice protest in Washington D.C. 

I wonder if Pence knows he almost certainly has loved ones who have had abortions. 

Would he still love them if he knew? Would he listen to their reasons, to the pros and cons they weighed, to the thoughts with which they wrestled? To why abortion was the best choice for them? To how they felt on the car or bus ride to and from the clinic or hospital? 

Does he really believe millions of women worldwide are murderers? 

I’ve never had an abortion, but I’m forever grateful to Planned Parenthood and to the morning-after pill. In 1997, my then boyfriend and I had a condom break and I was at PP the next morning. I’ve never wanted children. And while that boyfriend later proposed, I ended the relationship for myriad reasons. If we’d had a child, I’ve no doubt today I’d be a single mom, and a disabled one at that. 

He’d just be a guy paying child support. 

Women tend to discuss abortion differently when men aren’t in the room. 

As such, I’ve heard so many stories from elderly women, some now dead, about abortions they had before Roe v. Wade was legal. 

One nearly died from sepsis after the “doctor” (she didn’t know if he was a real physician) used dirty utensils. She was leaving a bad marriage and didn’t want to have a child with that man.

Another threw herself down her family’s long stairwell. She was pregnant with her sixth child and exhausted from tending to the five kids she and her husband already had. She miscarried, but was badly injured. 

One was grieving a horrific death in her family and knew she couldn’t raise a baby at that time.

I don’t know if my own grandmothers had abortions. 

Here’s what I do know:

My maternal grandmother nearly died giving birth to my aunt. Her doctors concluded she was at high risk for death with any subsequent pregnancies. But this was 1946. So instead of relaying this information to my grandmother, her male doctors told my grandfather. He didn’t tell her until years later. She became very sick after giving birth to my uncle. To the best of my knowledge, it was her fourth pregnancy that left her unable to conceive. She miscarried in the eighth month. He would have been a boy and she was going to name him after her father. 

She was 22 years old. 

My paternal grandmother died at 26 in Greece under Nazi occupation. She contracted tuberculosis and had to be quarantined. My father’s last memory of his mom: the paramedics dragging her away while she screamed his name. She died in the sanitarium and was buried in a mass grave. She left behind my father and his two brothers, each of whom were treated as orphans under Greek law (at that time a child with a deceased mother was legally orphaned because it was not a father’s legal responsibility to care for his children). My dad and his brothers were given to three different homes. War and famine had laid waste to Greece. Would my grandmother have had children if birth control were an option? If abortion had been available? 

I wonder about her last thoughts in the sanitarium, knowing her children would be alone then scattered like seeds.

If I could tell Mike Pence any of these stories, would he listen? 

One more tragedy:

We all know the answer.

Snorting Snowflakes

I hurt everywhere. I need sunglasses to sit inside on an overcast day. I struggle to ride in cars anymore, and I don’t make it much farther than my backyard. I’m not the same person I was - a part of me is probably gone forever, but I hope the “gone” took some of the worst.

Today, in that backyard, I inhaled a snowflake. And goodness! The snort preceded real, deep laughter - the kind of laughter that fills your stomach of all its empty nooks. Standing there, exhausted just being a few yards from my bed, I noticed it:

I’m miserable. But I am happy. You try explaining that.

VLD vs. DotU Personalities

I was having a conversation with @maplecat89​ today about how Lance from the Defenders of the Universe was a tame version of Legendary Defender Keith’s hot-headed personality (he picked a fight with a guy who showed up to ask Allura to marry him).  A little while later, I was watching my 2 year old playing with her Voltron lion toys and she was asking where the Red Lion is (her Daddy lost it “in the car”).  I joked that Lance was taking it for a joy ride…and then I had a realization…

I did a post about the characteristics the VLD lions look for in their paladins a while back.  As you guys know, the original pilots were switched up in VLD to match their lion colors.  If we apply the VLD Quintessence characteristics to the original Defenders pilots…

Keith: “The Black Lion is the decisive head of Voltron.  It will take a pilot who is a born leader and in control at all times, someone whose men will follow without hesitation.”

Lance: “The Red Lion is temperamental and the most difficult to master.  It’s faster and more agile than the others, but also more unstable.  It’s pilot needs to be someone who relies more on instincts than skill alone.”

Pidge:  “The Green Lion has an inquisitive personality and needs a pilot of intellect and daring.”

Hunk:  “The Yellow Lion is caring and kind.  It’s pilot is one who puts the needs of others above his own.  His heart must be mighty.”

Allura: Even though the Blue Lion’s Quintessence was never revealed in Season 1, it’s been speculated that it revolves around trust.  This post does a good job of explaining that.

I didn’t include Sven because he only lasts 6 episodes of the original and Hunk didn’t have much of a personality outside of a fat guy obsessed with food so his is arguable, but everyone else fits.  And if anyone questions Defenders Allura being trusting, just look at the time she followed a white lion because it told her it was her reincarnated father.  Or the time she let Haggar into the castle while she was disguised as Allura’s aunt and didn’t believe the pilots, who had figured out it was Haggar.  The more I think about it, the more Defenders Allura’s personality matches VLD Lance.  Not the happy-go-lucky front Lance puts on, but he’s trusting, kind of naive, keeps bumping the Blue Lion into things…

…Lance is the new Allura.  I would so be on board if Lotor shows up and starts spouting about how beautiful Lance is XD


exercise 02102017

bike ride to the gym

  • 6 x 5 pec machine @ 135#
  • 4 x 5 dips
  • 6 x 5 row machine @ 160#
  • 6 x 5 low row machine @ 145#
  • 3 x 10 tricep press machine @ 125#
  • 6 x 5 seated press machine @ 210#
  • 30 minutes on the stationary bike

bike ride home

the gym workers (Madison and Emily and Robert) mini Hershey bars..

  • good day at work today / received positive feedback from my boss for the results from a phone conference that i set up and hosted this morning with 2 attorneys and 3 big boss people and some other people like me on the call
  • saw wrecked car above on my way home from the gym / praying that the people are ok / there was an ambulance in the nearby parking lot
  • that Steppenwolf is really good music
What Are You Afraid Of?-Stiles Stilinski

Teen Wolf Imagine:#3 Prompt:#87

Word count:1,227

Warnings: Talk of fears

A/n: So I wanted this to be up yesterday but I went to my moms for the day to help get ready for my sister’s birthday party today but it’s now 5:15am and I have finished this, hopefully I will finish the next one tonight when I get home from the party. I had no idea where it was going until I finished writing it, so I hope you enjoy it. (The response on the Brett imagine (and even the Isaac one) has been amazing. Remember you can request things, or just message me to tell me what you think about an imagine, I always enjoy opinions.


Coming Soon


Keep reading

I get so offended when I’m in the car in the middle of a long car ride just listening to music and zoning out and then have the person I’m with turn down the volume it’s like….. excuse me….. music is the only thing that’s keeping me sane and from actually ruining everyone’s day by running my mouth there’s nothing good that’ll come out of it today….. get out of my vehicle beep beep

I am having an unbelievably stressful week. Today, I got screwed out of therapy and cussed out a cab company because I’d called them with thirty minutes of advance and they didn’t arrive at my apartment literally until I needed to be where I was going. The place told me they will not see me if I wasn’t there by the approved time. I even tried both Uber and Lyft to get a ride, but nothing. I need my own fucking car already. I may have a shot at getting back into therapy if I go to the local place in town that also does my psychiatry, but they want to start me from scratch, so that’s another two months of waiting. Online won’t take me. The place today won’t take me. Another place doesn’t take people with eating disorders. Another place doesn’t take new patients right now. I’m getting pretty frustrated. Why do I have to be hospitalized before anyone will help me? Fuck. It would be easier if I had a way out of town, so that I could get to another therapists’ office, but currently no luck. I’ve got one more option here on campus, but it’s people who don’t have degrees. So… I’m pretty stressed. 

If I don’t get to questions right away, or am not terribly active, it’s because I feel a constant stress headache and my life is kind of imploding. So, sorry about that. I want to be there for you guys who ask me for advice, I really do, but I’m not 100% up to the challenge right now. I’ll reblog a lot of useless bullshit to my side blog, @awkwardkermitfrog, if you’re looking for updates. I basically just reblog stuff I like and think is funny on there. Oh, and there’s my art blog, @elloellerose. I wish I could do more art, but my work schedule makes that pretty difficult. I have no energy, I’m at work when everyone is free, my job is boring, my coworkers… I tolerate them but still, and I’m finding myself constantly on the verge of an angry outburst or tears. So again, if I’m not as active, I apologize. I just can’t do all of the things right now. 

anonymous asked:

How do you communicate with your spirits?? I've tried, but I just don't feel anything!

Personally? I really don’t know. It’s all intuition and a sensing feeling. I always have a pendulum on me to ask if it’s real or imagined.
I find spirits you are the companion of are easiest to communicate with. With P, I can feel her when she’s on me or within a few feet. This is mostly helped by her vessel which aids in communication. If I really focus and am in tune, I can tell where she is at any given time. Car rides are great for this type of practice. Once in a while I’ll get a thought or feeling from her that I can understand, or at least ask for clarification.
With other spirits, it’s harder. I can’t feel B at all unless I leave my body. Then I can only feel where he is, but can’t see or hear. Well, up until today, when I heard him screaming. (When I asked what was wrong, P said he was bored and did this often so-)

If you just start off with spirits, I suggest meditating very frequently. Fifteen minutes a day if you can manage. I’m bad at this, because I just can’t keep my head clear for that long, but just go as long as you can. If you know how to astral travel, go to your own personal section of astral and invite your spirit friend in. There it’s easier to communicate because there’s less of a physical barrier.

Some people are just naturally gifted than others too, so don’t compare yourself! My friend had been working with spirits for less than an hour. All he did was open his astral eyes and he saw a bunch of spirits in his room. He can communicate and see them with ease. I, however, have been working with spirits for well over six months and can barely since those I’m bonded with. It just takes more work for people like me! That doesn’t mean to give up though! try using a pendulum, tarot cards, or Ouija board for communication and clarification!
Good luck and don’t give up!! I’m here if you have any other questions!

ooc: Updated on how I am doing with the whole med situation!i feel like i’m going to puke, i feel like there is someone punching me between the eyes, i am getting hot flashes and cold sweats and at random times during the day. i get drowsy. Med changes are a son of a bitch I’ll tell you that. (It should be noted that while I’m adjusting to a new med I am also withdrawing from a lowered dosage of a very powerful med I’m taking. I was on a very high dosage for a long time and since it’s been suddenly reduced my body is doing that thing.So yeah..) Also remind me not to go on car rides ever again while changing meds because holy shit. it makes me more nauseous. RIP (on the bright side today i had an anxiety attack today but it didn’t spiral, it just stopped abruptly? So that’s good right…..) Anyway sorry to bore you all with that, I will try to answer things whenever I can, thank you all for your support and patience with me as I push through this tough time!  Seeing you all on the dash makes me smile !

To continue the theme from @lovepotsie’s post about How a Spoonie Says I Love You,
let’s do:
How to say I Love You to a spoonie!

“I remembered you’re allergic, so I made you something else”

“Do you need me to drop anything off while I’m out?”

“How did your doctor appointment go?”

“Do you need a ride?”

“Let’s just stay in tonight”

“Why don’t you go to bed early?”

“Stay in the car, I’ll just run in”

“Take my seat, I don’t mind standing”

“Don’t worry, I already said I didn’t want to go”

“What can I do to help?”

“Do you want to leave early?”

“I already did the chores”

“What should I pick up for dinner?”

“I already opened all the new jars in the fridge for you”

“I wanted to let you sleep in”

“I understand.”

Feel free to add your own! I’m loving all these posts.

C: While riding along with a friend today, four Latino men proceeded to call me a “stupid nigger bitch” and throw a beer bottle at the car, all b/c we allowed a car, who had the right away, to cross the intersection…

Yeah, I may be a nigger, and I admit I can be a bitch here and there, but this Psychology B.A. hanging on my wall lets me know I am far from stupid 😊🤗😊

Today after we had voted, my boyfriend & I went out for lunch at a raw cafe a few towns over from us. My bike was in the back of the car and I really wanted to get a quick ride in as it is my designated rest day.

While I was riding my boyfriend stopped me & got me to recreate my before photo.

Photo on the left: November last year @ 127kgs / 279lbs. (Size 22)
Photo on the right: July 2nd @ 94.3kg / 207lbs. (Size 16-14)

Down 33.5kgs / 73.8lbs

Still another 14.5kgs to go!
Roller Coaster AU

AU: We are sitting next to each other on the ride and I’m obviously terrified and oh look your holding my hand
From this post:
Pairing: Solangelo (bc I’m Solangelo trash)
Note: They are not demigods in this story

Will’s POV:
Holy shit. What was I doing? Why did I agree to this? I swear I’m going to kill Lou Ellen and Cecil for making me go on this ride. My best friends and I had gone to a theme park today and they were forcing me to go on this huge coaster. Even worse, they were going to sit next to each other, and since each car only had two seats, I was going to sit next to some random stranger

I must have been shaking because Lou Ellen put her hand on my shoulder. “Calm down Will, the worst that could happen is the coaster breaks down.”

“Well that’s helps!” I say.

“Oh please it won’t break down and your NOT going to die,” Cecil tried to reassure me. No matter how hard they tried I was still terrified. I put my hands in my pocket to keep them from shaking. I looked up at the coaster. God, it was really tall. This was also the first looping coaster I would go on. The closer we got, the more nervous I was.

We got up to the front and made our way to the seats. “Good luck,” Cecil said. Then Lou Ellen and Cecil walked off and sat down next to each other. I sat down in an empty cart in the middle, still skiing like crazy. The gigantic hill looked so much taller from here. I could feel the drops of sweat on my forehead.

I felt someone getting into the seat next to me. It was a boy who looked about my age. He wore a black t-shirt and black jeans. His long dark hair hung in his face almost covering his dark eyes. The boy’s eyes looked like a dark pit. You could eaisily fall into them and get lost.

“Hi,” I say, my voice still shaky.

“Hello,” The boy replies turning to look at me. I realize that I’m still skaking and run my hands through my hair nervously.

“Scared?” He asked.

“How could you tell?”

“Well you’re shaking, running your hands through your hair and before I sat down you were staring at the hill with a terrified look on your face.”

“Well roller coasters aren’t exactly my thing. My friends forced me to go on.”

“You know you have a higher chance of getting injured playing sports than you do on a roller coaster.”

“Huh. What’s your name?”

“Nico di Angelo. You?”

“Will Solace.” I say. I looked at Nico’s hair again. It looked smooth. I wondered what it would be like to run my fingers through it. Woah, woah, WOAH. What was I doing? I just met this guy, and what were the chances of him being attracted to boys as well? My focus changed from Nico to the coaster when the worker came and pulled down our lap bar. I stared at the coaster, shaking again.

“Oh my god oh my god I’m gonna die!”

“You’re not gonna die,” Nico said.

“I’m gonna die!” I started breathing faster and my pulse got faster. The roller coaster started moving, which made me panic even more. As we climbed the first hill, I gripped the lap bar as tight as I could. I felt the sweat on my forehead. Once we were almost at the top I felt something slip under my hand. I looked down and Nico was holding my hand. At first I was startled. I looked up at him and he smiled. I smiled back and gripped his hand. We got to the top of the hill and suddenly went down.

“AHHHHHHH” I screamed. I must have been screaming like a little girl because Nico was laughing his ass off. Once we got to the loop I screamed even louder, probably breaking Nico’s fingers. Once the loop was over I got used to the coasters and started laughing and having fun. I never let go of Nico’s hand though. The coaster ended too soon.

“That was…. Exhilarating.” I laugh.

“Yeah. You scream like a little girl,” Nico smiled. We walked off the ride together. Once we got off Lou Ellen and Cecil caught up with us.

“That was awesome!” Lou Ellen cheered!

“Come on Will!” Cecil gestured to me to come to another ride.

“Ummm,” I looked at Nico. “I’ll catch up with you.” Cecil shrugged and went off. I looked back at Nico. “Thanks for that,” I say. “Helping me, I mean.”

“Uh, No problem,” Nico said. I looked at Nico’s eyes, then his lips, then his eyes again. And then, without thinking, not caring about the people around, I leaned in and pressed my lips against Nico’s. At first, Nico was shocked but he then kissed back. We both broke apart, staring at each other. I smiled and then so did Nico.

“Race you to the next ride,” I said.

“Oh you’re so on!” Nico replied. We ran toward the next ride, laughing like crazy.

So today I was really excited to watch the first episode of Stevenbomb, and came home from work early just so that I would be on time. I got to my house and my brother came to me and begged me for a ride to his cross country practice. Sure, no big deal, I drove him to the high school and dropped him off.

But when I got back in the car and put the key in the ignition it wouldn’t start. I rummaged through my purse and I couldn’t find my phone. By this time it was 5:45, and SU would start in 15 min. It was also raining.

So guess who ran home in the rain in flip flops just to see “Sworn to the Sword”? This fuckin’ nerd. And what did I have to gain from it? HUGE FUCKING TEARS OHMYGOD PEARL MY BABY