this is dumb and ugly

4

On the third day of christmas my true love gave to me

three ugly sweaters

two stupid volleybirbs & the greatest brotp

Things I can't ever imagine

- People having crushes on me.
- Being someone’s last and first though through the day.
- People smiling cause I message them.
- People being in love with me.
- People wanting to be with me forever.
- People canceling plans to be with me.
- People talking to their friends about how much they like me.
- People getting excited to see me again.
- People fangirling over me.
- People thinking about kissing/hugging/cuddling me.
- People smiling/blushing when they think about me.
- People wishing I was by their side.

Ok but, really, did the general public ever get a decent explanation as to where Superboy came from? Do people even know he’s a clone? Wouldn’t they wonder how there’s another Kryptonian flying around when the whole planet has been exploded for at least 3 decades? Where are the answers people? So in my mind, it went one of two ways.

One, Lex absolves himself of any relation to Superboy to the people and Clark and Kara are forced to come up with some weird BS explanation for why there’s another Super around. Anything from “he’s my cousin’s-uncle’s-brother’s-great-aunt once removed’s-teacher’s son” to “He also crash landed in a ship that came to Earth from Krypton and it got lost in space and now he’s here” to, my personal favorite, the Batman approach. “We found him and he was cute and strong so we slapped a big ole ’S’ on his chest and brought him home.”

Or option two, Lex tells all. He was so sad when Superman died that he made a clone, his name is Kon and we love him. And he and Clark get in very public custody battles over poor Kon-El (“Hi honey, I’m home from work. Anything happen on the news?” “No Jeff, just the continuation of the Luthor/Superman court case.” “Golly gee Sue, ain’t it awful when parents can’t keep it together for their child?”) And of course you got those groups who are all up in arms about Superboy can’t have two dads, and you got people who are Team Lex or Team Superman over who gets Superboy and they all fucking end up on Jerry Springer to sort this out. It’s very bitter and ugly and the public loves it. Poor Kon, he just wants to Radical and Chillin’ Teen he knows he is and for his dads to get along. He ends up hiding with Tim and somewhere along the way while Clark and Lex are at each other throats, Conner gets absorbed into the batfam. Whoops, Bruce did it again.